Muiz Bukhary – Tired of Being Taken for Granted- Do THIS to Take Back Control

AI: Summary ©
The speaker gives five ways to improve one's life without over-explaining, including owning decisions, owning decisions, and owning decisions. They stress the importance of consistency and investing in one's growth, health, and happiness. The speaker also provides practical tips for those who want to own decisions and emphasizes the importance of elevating one's standards and values.
AI: Summary ©
As-salāmu ʿalaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh My
dear brother, my dear sister, are you constantly
feeling unappreciated, overlooked, or at times taken for
granted?
Does it seem like no matter what you
do, no matter how much you give, no
matter how much you try, people still don't
respect or value you enough?
Let me tell you something important.
It's really not about them.
It's about you and the standards that you
set for your life.
You see, the truth is people treat you
the way you allow them to treat you.
But here's the good news.
You have the power, with the help of
Allah, to change that starting today.
So in this video, I'm going to show
you, with the help of Allah, how to
raise your standards, how to stop being taken
for granted, and how to reclaim your worth.
We're going to be talking about setting boundaries,
to mastering the art of saying no.
You will inshallah discover powerful ways, powerful strategies
to elevate your life and to also enhance
your relationships.
So given that 2024 is coming to an
end and 2025 is around the corner, if
you are ready to stop settling and start
thriving, then I need you to stick around
because this could be the life-changing message
that you need.
So number one, I need you to know
your worth and embrace it.
You see, high value individuals, they know their
worth.
They are not afraid to acknowledge their unique
qualities, their talents, their skill sets, their contributions.
You see, understanding your worth is the bedrock.
It is the foundation of setting healthy boundaries
and also building meaningful relationships.
Think about it.
When you walk into a room with confidence,
you're oozing with confidence.
People notice.
But you see, confidence begins from within.
It is about knowing what you bring to
the table and refusing to let anyone devalue
it.
You are not defined by someone else's inability
to see your worth.
Recognize your value and stand firm in it.
I want to give you a practical tip.
I need you to write down your strengths
and your achievements.
Now this is quite subjective because I have
unique strengths, unique talents, unique abilities.
You have unique strengths, unique talents, unique abilities,
a unique skill set.
So you need to write them down and
you need to reflect on them regularly.
Remind yourself that you are deserving of respect.
You are deserving of love.
You are deserving of fairness in all aspects
of life.
Number two, I need you to raise your
standards, not just your boundaries.
You see, boundaries are important.
They are essential, very important.
They are about what you will not tolerate.
But you see, standards are even more powerful.
They are about what you actively expect and
deserve.
For example, it is one thing to set
a boundary that you won't tolerate any form
of disrespect.
It is another thing to raise your standard,
to expect kindness, to expect consideration, and to
expect mutual respect in all your interactions.
Boundaries protect you.
Standards transform you.
Standards are transformative, very powerful.
So a practical tip, take a moment to
reflect on areas of your life where you've
been settling and ask yourself, what do I
truly want and deserve?
You've been settling for, at times, you know,
some of us, we settle for mediocre.
May Allah protect us.
You need to set your standards accordingly.
Set your standards high.
Number three, I need you to recognize and
communicate your value.
Here's the truth.
If you don't recognize your worth, I doubt
anyone else will.
You see, when you show up unsure of
yourself, it is a clear invitation for others
to treat you the same way.
Show others your value through your actions, through
your words.
Speak the language of confidence.
Speak with confidence.
Speak with clarity.
This is a sunnah.
The prophet used to speak with clarity.
He did not mince his words.
He did not mumble in his mouth.
He spoke confidently and he spoke with clarity.
So speak with confidence.
Speak with clarity.
Avoid language that diminishes your worth.
You know, stop sounding so meek.
Stop the constant apologies or, you know, humor
where you make fun of yourself.
You mock yourself.
Why?
Because you lack the confidence.
No, you must be confident.
And bear in mind, confidence does not mean
being loud or overbearing.
It means standing firm in who you are.
You see, you can even be quiet.
You can be confident and silent.
Subhanallah.
So here's a practical tip.
Practice confident communication.
For example, instead of saying, I think I
can do this.
Say, I can do this inshallah.
You see, subtle shifts in language make a
big difference.
Think about it.
You go into a room, go into a
presentation, a meeting, and you're like, I think
I can do it versus I can do
it inshallah.
You see, the latter conveys you know what
you're talking about.
You can execute.
You can deliver.
The confidence in you, it speaks volumes.
All right, moving on.
Number four.
Avoid overgiving in relationships and becoming a stepping
stone.
Ask yourself, are you someone who constantly gives
without expecting anything in return?
You see, generosity is a beautiful trait.
It is a prophetic trait, but we are
humans and overgiving can lead to burnout and
also being taken for granted.
Again, it is the prophetic teaching that you're
not supposed to cheat, nor be cheated.
You're not supposed to take advantage or be
taken advantage of.
You're not supposed to take people for granted,
nor should you be taken for granted.
One-sided relationships drain you.
They drain your energy.
They drain your self-esteem.
True connections, on the other hand, are full
of reciprocation.
If you are always the one giving, whether
it's your time, your energy, your resources, your
money, then I think it's time to reassess
those dynamics.
A practical tip here, set boundaries around your
giving of your time, your energy, your resources.
Ask yourself, am I giving because I genuinely
want to or because I feel obligated or
I feel pushed against a wall?
You need to let go of those relationships
that are like leeches that only take without
giving back.
Number five, I need you to own your
decisions without over-explaining.
You see, when you make a decision, own
it.
You don't need to explain or justify every
decision, every choice of yours to others.
Over-explaining weakens your position and it opens
the door for unnecessary criticism.
For example, let's say an invitation comes your
way and you are not in a position
to go for it.
So, you choose to decline.
Now, a simple, I'm not available is more
than enough.
You don't need to go out of the
way to provide a detailed schedule of your
entire day, you know, trying to over-explain
why you can't make it for something.
Confidence in your decisions shows others that you
value yourself, you value your time.
Here's a practical tip, practice saying no firmly
and politely without having to over-explain.
Remember, always remember, your decisions do not require
validation from others.
Number six, make consistency your superpower.
Consistency is one of the most, I'd say
one of the most underrated qualities of high
-value individuals.
It is the secret sauce to building trust,
building your brand, building respect and a strong
reputation.
When you show up consistently, whether it is
for yourself or others, you demonstrate reliability.
People know now that they can count on
you and that's a powerful thing.
Consistency, by the way, does not mean perfection.
You can make mistakes.
Consistency means showing up even when it's hard.
So the practical tip here, start with small
things, small commitments, whether it's sticking to a
workout routine, completing tasks on time, avoiding procrastination,
following through on promises.
You say you're going to be somewhere at
a certain time, follow through on that promise.
You say you're going to make a payment,
follow through on that promise and work towards
making consistency a habit.
Number seven, I need you to understand the
power of saying no.
Saying no is one of the most liberating
things you can do for yourself.
It's not about rejecting others.
Don't misunderstand this.
It's about choosing yourself.
When you say yes to things that don't
serve you, you are saying no to your
own priorities, to your own well-being.
Learning to say no protects your time.
It protects your energy.
It protects your mental health.
It protects you from being taken for granted.
The practical tip here, use polite but firm
phrases like, for example, I appreciate the offer,
but I am unable to commit to it
right now.
Or simply even saying no, thank you.
You see, a simple no is a complete
sentence.
We shy away from this word, almost like
a taboo word.
But once you start to understand the power
of no, it's very powerful, very liberating.
Next on the list, number eight, number eight,
you attract what you deserve when you raise
your standards.
You now will start to naturally attract people
and opportunities that align with your values.
The law of attraction is real.
What you expect, you invite into your life.
So high standards create a filter, ensuring that
only the right people and the right opportunities
enter your life.
You will find that the relationships and experiences
that you attract are of much higher quality
because they match your elevated expectations.
So the practical tip here is that you
should surround yourself with people who uplift, propel,
and inspire you.
Let go of all of the negativity.
Let go of those who drag you down
through the mud.
Let go of those who disrespect your boundaries.
You must let go.
Number nine, break the cycle of people-pleasing.
People-pleasing is a surefire way to be
taken for granted.
It's really high time to stop prioritizing everyone
else's needs over your own.
Again, yes, generosity is a good trait.
Prioritizing the needs of others is a good
trait.
So long as you are not used as
a stepping stone, so long as you are
not taken advantage of, so long as you
are not used as a stepping rug, saying
yes to everyone and everything often leaves you
feeling drained and unappreciated.
So this is something that you need to
be careful about.
The practical tip here before saying yes to
something, ask yourself, is this truly what I
want?
If the answer is no, or if you
are in doubt, give yourself permission to politely
say no to decline.
The last action item, if you will, invest
in yourself.
Raising your standards starts with you, my dear
brother, my dear sister.
You need to invest in your growth, invest
in your health, and invest in your happiness.
When you prioritize yourself, you send a powerful
message to the world that you value who
you are.
So therefore dedicate time each day, each week,
each month towards self-improvement.
It can be learning a new skill.
It can be taking care of your physical
health.
It can be practicing mindfulness, taking care of
your mental health.
Every small step counts.
So in conclusion, I need you to start
today.
Raising your standards is not just a one
-time decision.
It is a lifestyle.
It is a work in progress.
It is about consistently choosing respect, value, and
self-worth in every area of your life.
Remember, the way others treat you is a
reflection of what you accept.
Don't settle for less than you deserve.
Don't settle for mediocre.
Take action today.
Start small but start strong.
Raise your standards and watch how inshallah your
life transforms.
You are worthy, my dear brother, my dear
sister, you are worthy of a life filled
with respect, filled with value.
But it starts with you.
When you elevate yourself, you propel and inspire
others to do the same.
Thank you for watching this video of mine.
Do follow me on my socials.
I look forward to talking to you in
another video inshallah.
Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.