Muhammad Hoblos – Divorces are Increasing Too Much

			I'm sick of it. Every second person wants to get a divorce. I'm getting divorced. I just got
divorced. I'm thinking about divorce, divorce is becoming like a trend. Is this what we've come to?
And yes, there's no denying that divorce is permissible in Islam, but only as the last resort after
exhausting every possible avenue, then divorce is mentioned. And again, there's also no denying that
some people need to get divorced ASAP, because they're in an extreme, toxic, violent relationship.
But this is not what I'm talking about. What I'm talking about is people that are getting divorced,
have a trivial problems, problems that could have been solved very easily. People that are getting
		

			divorced after a week of marriage after he was still in teething stages, baby stages. People who
there the after divorce is actually longer than the marriage was. What are we coming to divorce is
not a Get Out of Jail Free card.
		

			It's not something we threaten your spouse with day in mind. My brothers and sisters, marriage is
not all rainbows and lollipops. That's just the reality. So get off your phone, get off Facebook,
stop looking at other people's glamorous marriage, or so it's perceived to be and start worrying and
focusing on your own problems. You know, Imam Muhammad, one of the great scholars of Islam, when he
was asked after a 30 year marriage, when he was asked, How did you do it? He said when I was angry,
my wife was patient. And when she was angry, I was patient. It's how it works. Do not be shy to seek
help. No harm. There's no harm in asking Allah. There's no harm in going to someone, actually, we
		

			are advised to seek an arbitrator, get someone from your family, someone from her family, or even
someone from the community. If you guys are having problems. It's not the end of the world. It
doesn't mean you guys are bad people, but seek help. The Prophet of Allah used to bring in an
arbitrator, when he met his wife would have an issue. This is the process to fix things to make
amends Allah, Allah guides us again and again in the Quran, to fix things to make peace. Allah says
no, if you really want to fix things, then I will fix them for you. But you got to want it. And if
my brothers and sisters, after exhausting every avenue, you guys have decided that divorce is the
		

			only resort.
		

			Then To you I say,
		

			Make it as peaceful as possible.
		

			Allah orders us that if you are to divorce, divorce in the best, honorable way possible.
		

			With love and compassion, not with enmity and hatred and spite and animosity towards each other. I
feel like the kids, kids have become like collateral damage when it comes down the horses. No one
cares. It's all about me, and how you hurt me. And because you hurt me so much. Now I'm going to do
everything possible to hurt you back. Is this how we deal with each other? Is this how I'm gonna
deal with the mother of my children? You be the better Manber. You give her more than what she
deserves. You be a better woman.
		

			You be someone that's of honor. And you deal with him better than what he dealt with you. When we
got married. It was in the masjid and we wanted the Imam there. And we want the blessings of Allah
knows all cute and dandy. But then when we get divorced, the * with all of this stuff, man. And
now it's your mayor versus my lawyer. And I'm going to squeeze you for everything I can, and you are
going to try to do the same. What's this?
		

			What's this, and then nothing burns me more than this. Right? People will stand in a court and take
an oath, standing in front of a judge and they will lie to get full custody of the child again, just
to spite and they will say that, you know, this person is a terrible father or terrible mother. Why
are you lying? You know, she's a good mum. She was maybe a bad wife. But you know, she's a good mum.
You're prepared to deprive your children of a mother want to prove a point. Sisters are doing the
same. You're depriving your children of a father, you know is a good bed. But you prepared to lie
out of spite to get full custody so I can prove a point. This is not Diem and this is not Islam.
		

			I swear by Allah. This is not Islam.
		

			The Prophet of Allah says this.
		

			He who does not show mercy and compassion to others. He will not be shown mercy and compassion. Bye