Mufti Menk – You Might Face This Dilema
AI: Summary ©
The speaker discusses the importance of standing for justice even if it is against one's parents. They stress that while one may be wrong, it is important to stand for justice even if it is against one's own family. The speaker also emphasizes the importance of not being oppressed and not trying to correct anyone's behavior.
AI: Summary ©
Then Allah
says,
And when you speak,
you must be just.
You must be just even if it is
against your own relatives.
Now
in another place in the Quran, Allah tells
us to be just even if it is
against yourselves or your parents or your relatives.
This echoes that where Allah is saying in
verse number 152 of Suratul An'am that when
you speak, when you judge between people, be
just, be very, very fair and balanced, even
if it is against your own relatives.
So sometimes people have problems
and their parents are on one side
and justice is on the other.
Sometimes we're blackmailed by a verse or a
hadith, a statement of the prophet peace be
upon him, where we know we have to
be kind to our parents and we must
make sure that we are good and dutiful
and respectful. So people say, well, if heaven
lies in the service of my parents, then
how can I side against my parents
when this is a matter of dispute?
Well, Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala overrides all of
that by the verses of justice
and he says justice comes first whether it
is against you, your mom and dad or
your relatives.
So those who achieve the greatest comfort are
those who stand for justice
even if it is against their own parents.
That does not mean you shouldn't be kind
to them. It does not mean you should
not be respectful,
but you need to stand up for justice.
What is right is right even if
it were an enemy
and what is wrong is wrong even if
it
were your own parents, your mother, someone whom
Allah has really encouraged us to be so
kind to.
At times her human nature can take over
and perhaps she can say or do something
wrong, especially
those who are married. Sometimes you have your
own children and so much is happening in
the house. Don't think that your mom, for
example, or your spouse or your children are
all angels.
We're just human beings.
I make mistakes.
You make mistakes. And sometimes
the human nature or the habits begin to
show.
If those habits are oppressive,
you need to stand for justice in order
to comfort yourself in that crisis.
If you'd like to achieve the comfort, stand
for justice.
But if you were to oppress those who
are right,
just because on the other side is a
relative or a parent, mother or father or
a child or a sibling,
then you would create
a huge crisis.
And in fact, you would not be able
to come out of that crisis and you
won't know why.
But it's as simple as a b c,
something that is happening in front of your
eyes that is wrong and you are not
prepared to correct it. You're not even prepared
to say
this is wrong.
Very respectfully,
very politely with utmost kindness, you've got to
tell your mother or your father or your
relative,
my beloved mother, I love you so much
but in this matter, you are wrong. SubhanAllah.
The mercy that will descend,
the blessings that will envelope you are amazing
because
you've stood up for justice and be firm.
And yes, she may be hurt, but you're
my son. You're my daughter. How could you
tell me that? You've got to go back
to the story of the prophet Abraham, may
peace be upon him. You've got to look
at that and see how he corrected his
father with utmost respect. He told his father,
look, I know something you don't know. Listen
to what I have to say.
So this is something we learn a great
lesson. Many people are struggling in their homes.
They are suffering in the marital home. They
are suffering within their own circle simply because
they have not stood up for what was
right in a respectful way, in a very
polite way because they found that their parents
were
on the other side. May Allah
grant us the steadfastness.