Mufti Menk – How can it be better for me?

			Salam Alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh
		

			Smilla Rahmanir Rahim Al hamdu Lillahi wa sallahu wa sallahu wa Salam o Baraka, Allah Mallanna, BIA
Biden, who Allah, Allah, he was happy, he urged my my brothers, my sisters,
		

			sometimes you could have a business where you've worked very hard. And you know for a fact that
you've tried your best, and the customers are generally happy with your service. And it happens that
you're a human being, that will be that one guy who comes to your business perhaps. And maybe he
feels he had a raw deal. And so what he does, he gives you a very bad review. He bad mouths you, he
goes around in society saying the nastiest things about you and your business. But between you and
Allah, you know that the 10,000 people that really love everything that your business stands for,
and your ethics, morals, values, service, etc, are actually way beyond just this one guy, but the
		

			damage he is causing is severe, and so much that it's unbearable.
		

			And this probably happens to every single one of us, whether you're a school teacher, whether you're
working for someone, sometimes you work for a person,
		

			and you find that you've done things right for 20 years, and one mistake you've made, and suddenly
your own senior or boss perhaps might not even consider that you've served dedicatedly and helped
towards the growth of the business beyond measure. And they would never look past that one thing
that you did, that was a blunder or not even a blunder, perhaps human nature a mistake. May Allah
Almighty grant us ease. I give you another example. Sometimes you have a relationship, and people
think that okay, you know, I'm gonna give it my best shot. And I'm never going to do anything wrong.
And mashallah you develop over years, 10 years, perhaps five years, 20 years, etc.
		

			Then one small blunder, some misunderstanding, a little bit of anger, temper, etc. And you know
what, suddenly, your spouse or your family member or a friend of yours doesn't want to give you
another chance. I am not an advocate of giving another chance when What was done was so severe that
he doesn't deserve another chance. But I am an advocate of giving 20 Chances are more to those who
have heard in a way that it's not that serious, it's not a matter that you should break an entire
relationship over a lot of the times we break relations with our brothers, with our fathers, with
our children, with our family members simply because of a little bit of money, it happens. There was
		

			a misunderstanding, you got more than I did, and so on, and the relationship is gone forever.
Wallahi the value of your relationship is beyond the 10 million that you're fighting about
Subhanallah
		

			the value of the relationship, it depends who it is. I'm not saying let it go. I didn't say that.
Some people say, well look at this guy preaching just let it go. No, you can stand up and fight for
your rights. But do it respectfully. You can stand up and ask and demand for what is yours, but do
it respectfully. However, to let go of an entire relationship all for you to become abusive and
vulgar would actually make or perhaps create a bigger problem.
		

			Ask yourself
		

			for the sake of Allah, we have to be forced to gather in the masjid on a Friday like it or not, you
have to come why wh otherwise you're not a Muslim? Why why? What's the big deal about it? Why does
Allah forced me to come to a masjid with people I'm not related to they don't even belong to my
classroom I category that's what some people think. Well, Allah He they are more than your class and
category. They are your brothers and sisters. They are the part of the test of Allah for you. That's
the whole reason why you're sitting in this Masjid here and now. That's the reason why the guy next
to you is the guy next to you. That's the reason why there's going to be an irritation. I came up
		

			and rigged up my little tripod in front of me and I told myself you know, I'm going to inconvenience
the brothers here. But I'll say a quick prayer for them. May Allah bless you guys for the patients.
You're going to be with me in sha Allah. It's a broader benefit. I know some of my buddies as I
walked in here, they must be thinking Subhanallah Look at this guy. I have to do it on my own.
People think you have a huge team. Yes, I am my team. I've got 10 people in my team it's called a
finger 10 fingers it
		

			may Allah grant you all ease but the point I'm making is sometimes you will always get people who
misunderstand. I had a brother as I drove in and I was parking my car my window was down. Lovely
brother amazing, handsome looking guy. You
		

			He walks to me, and I'm trying to wind my window, park the car, look at the time get into the masjid
before the time. I've got 1,000,001 things on my mind and he wants to greet me through the window.
And I'm busy trying to shut down. I said, Look, brother, hold on. And then as I'm closing the
window, I don't know he may have felt brother, I know you're sitting somewhere I love you. He may
have felt or not felt. And then as the window is closing, and I and he wanted to walk away, I opened
my window. I said, I opened my door. I said, Brother, come back. Don't embarrass me. You're going
away as though I chased you. I didn't chase you. But consider the fact that I'm also a human, I am
		

			doing something I'm in the process of something extremely important. I made it to the masjid making
sure that I come here before 20 past well, for example, in order to give me 10 minutes to rig up and
set up and then what happens? By default, you have a person, the brother was lovely enough to wait
for me.
		

			And I came out I gave him a little gift. I told him my brother, I'm so sorry, shook his hand and
tried to ask him, What's your name, et cetera, et cetera. And mashallah, then he probably realized
that you know what? Yes, the man came out and greeted me, but you had to wait for those few seconds,
isn't it? May Allah grant us ease. The reason I say this is because sometimes you can't do that the
person went away with a wrong perception of who you are. The first interaction that you had with
someone and they really think you're a disaster, not realizing that my man 10,000 times I've done
this the one time that I didn't know I'm judged, Allahu Akbar. I started off by saying it happens to
		

			every one of us at some point in our lives. You're a lovely person. You give so much weight to so
many people. And you've really been so polite on the road that you're late for work all the time,
but the ones that you did not give someone way and you cut someone up, it happened to be your boss,
Allahu Akbar. Now what you get to you and say, You know what, this guy here you so shameless, you so
discourteous on the road relax, I've given if you knew my life, I give more away than you my man,
but I'm too shy to tell that to you because you my boss, may Allah grant us ease. I tell you, human
beings are required to do their best. And remember, it's between you and Allah, people will hate
		

			you. Even though you're a much better person than they are. People will hate you even though you may
be closer to Allah than they are. It's okay. It's one of those did you try your best? Did you give
it your best shot? Did you try to resolve matters? Did you try like I said, we are in this Masjid.
Now, different colors, different races, different nationalities, different people have different
social backgrounds and financial backgrounds and whatever else and so on.
		

			Why did Allah make it compulsory? Joomla. If you haven't made it for Joomla are five times a day, at
least you have to make it for the Joomla. Otherwise, like I said, you're not a Muslim. Allah wants
you to mix with people who are not exactly like you. He wants you to talk to them to greet them to
interact with them. He gives you an opportunity you see a man from a different place. Are you going
to at least greets as salaam aleikum, my brother how are you? If someone is for example, with a tire
that might need changing? Do you actually offer assistance or I clothes are gonna get missed in a
relaxed slavery can brother Good luck changing your tire? I'm gone. Does a Muslim do that? No. No
		

			matter what your dress like, the minute you see someone needing help, what are you taught? What am I
taught? Rush to help them and Allah will rush to help you at a time of your need. That's the reason
why the Joomla is so important Jama together. I've spoken about this a few times. And it's a
reminder to me because you know what, even in my life, sometimes we feel I don't need to interact.
Why should I interact with people whom I don't even know. Moments ago, my phone rang and I'm
thinking you know what? I don't recognize the number it could be someone phoning and swearing
sometimes it does happen. People just get your number and they want to demoralize you it happens by
		

			the way, it does happen. They phone you they sway you from A to Zed until you put the phone down.
What have they done? They tried to assassinate not just your character, but your personality, and
they want to drop your morale if you don't know and if it hasn't happened to you, thank Allah. So I
thought to myself, You know what, I will call this number back after salah I am in no position to
change my mood and mode prior to the prayer Allahu Akbar. But sometimes you feel why should I even
answer this phone? Why do I Why do I even need to bother? I tell you why you need to bother. Because
the Hadith says a person who interacts with the people and bears their
		

			what
		

			a person who interacts with the people and bears their negativity is better than the person who
doesn't interact with them at all. SubhanAllah. But if you cannot bear someone's negativity, you're
not compelled to interact because if it gets to a point where it's affecting your mental health and
your well being, trust me to take a step back from whoever it may be, is actually permissible.
Sometimes you have a person within the family, a person within your circles, and it's become tough
and I've tried and I've tried and every time it's getting worse, and it's getting even worse, and
it's becoming more and more toxic. I can stop
		

			Salam aleikum Wa alaykum wa sallam and I'm out. I don't want to talk too much because you know what?
Every time I speak, it's heading in the wrong direction. It gives me stress and anxiety to talk
Allahu Akbar. You're a human so am I. It happens to us. Step back nicely. You see them, give them a
nice opportunity to solve the matter by this greeting, salaam alaikum. Peace be upon you. You may
not be at peace with me, but guess what? I am at peace with you. It's okay. My brothers, my sisters,
you cannot please everyone. I want to take a moment to share with you something amazing. You see at
the time of the Prophet salallahu Salam.
		

			Everyone knew that the prophets of Allah Allah Salam is the most truthful, the most trustworthy,
something amazing. He never ever was known as a liar. He was people were asked, does this man tell a
lie? They said from the time he was born, there was not a single lie that we know that came out of
this man's mouth. Why did that happen? Allah was preparing him for something very high. Met in a guy
in community comes here preaching to you, and he's Elia and everyone knows this guy lies left right
and center, does he?
		

			Does he actually stand the chance of people believing him? But when a man is known as truthful and
honest and really upright and good character and conduct if that man comes to you and warns you
about the Day of Judgment, you need to know if he didn't lie to you about money matters and worldly
matters? Why would he lie to you about matters of the hereafter? Subhanallah so in the beam Muhammad
Sallallahu Sallam when he came through, they knew he was honest. They knew he was upright. They knew
his wives were as chaste and as pure as ever. Still, there was a man who created a rumor about Aisha
Radi Allahu Allah, what happened? They saw her coming back from a journey. But the caravan she was
		

			riding in something had happened. And now she was she was coming on the camera that belonged to a
man What was his name? His name was software and Apple or the Allahu Allah. And so, guys, and this
happens a lot of the times where guys see something, and they believe their eyes and sometimes it's
not a matter of believing eyes, it's mischief. I got the chance to nail this guy. That's exactly
what happened. It happens to you and I and now with the age or in the age of social media, it's,
it's gonna happen more. You hear something you see something it's not as you think it is. It's not
as you think it is. And so what did they do? A man called Mr. Hypno Assata also wrote the Allahu and
		

			he was related to Abu Bakr, Siddiq Radi Allahu Anhu. And he was a poor person, and he was being fed
and looked after by Abu Bakr Siddiq Ravi Allah Who, quietly behind the scenes he started spreading
rumor. She's having an affair stowford Allah. In fact, it was worse than that.
		

			Speaking about who, the most pure of the pure, if they could talk about her, imagine how painful it
must have been for the messenger SallAllahu Sallam to hear something about his wife. If you had to
hear about your wife in public circles among the men. How would you feel? I know we're in South
Africa. I don't want to say what would you do? But Subhanallah you know how you would feel to say
the least. Right? Talk about my wife. Wait, let's see what happens. Subhan Allah Hara will Allah
mean am I right or wrong guys? So if we can't bear that someone says something like that, about a
woman who's not a wife of a messenger or a daughter of a companion, may Allah's peace and blessings
		

			be on them? What do you think was the condition there? The prophets Allah Allah Salam says money
alone if he urged in Kabbalah Allah who feed
		

			80 of you
		

			who will excuse me regarding this man here, who's harm has reached my own household now meaning
Enough is enough. What's this guy trying? There were a few people who kept spreading rumor, and they
kept kept saying things but the point is, they came a time when Allah released revelation from the
heavens. When Allah subhanahu wata Allison revelation, what was the revelation? Allah says, in a
loving Naja been if Chios button come Kamala Sabu shall run lecom button who works on calm the CO
Lemare in
		

			tesab Amina it will lead the Kibera whom in whom love or other Boon name, Allah Almighty speaks
about the the amazing clarification that is mentioned in the Quran Allah says those who came with
the false accusation. The minute the term false accusation is mentioned. You already know there was
all alive.
		

			They are a part of you don't think it to be bad for you. In fact, it is good for you. That's the
title today. How can that be good
		

			For me, how can it be good for me 10,000 times. Like I said, at the beginning of this lecture 10,000
times I did the right thing. And people were satisfied. One guy who walked into my business,
something happened, his motor vehicle, or whatever your business is, his something went wrong. I
gave him something and it went wrong. And he came in and tried to portray my entire business as
something that is a fraud or something that is bad. So you find the ratings, the rankings go down,
you find all the
		

			references around have started becoming negative because of one guy. And now Allah is telling you,
it's a different story, but I'm throwing the example, that it's not bad for you, it's actually good
for you.
		

			You believe you're a good person. You know, I remember seeing a little video they did as a social
experiment where there was a man who was cleaning up a certain field at a school after a party.
		

			And he was picking up all the litter among the leftover beer bottles.
		

			Among the litter beer bottles, so this guy is picking up the beer bottles and it's throwing them
into the wind. In the meantime, we living in an age of social media, mashallah tick and tock in
order to tick and tock that particular app. You need to put something interesting right? Because
people flick they'll keep on flicking. You want to draw their attention to stop the flicking What do
you do show them a guy with a big beard and a bottle as soon as he sees that he stopped. Now we
found something man, what's this? He's got a bottle Look at this guy. He doesn't know the context
that this man was doing such a noble deep to clear out a field where there was litter and part of
		

			the thing was perhaps they might have been whatever they were beer bottles, he picked them up and
threw them away. Is it haram to pick up an empty beer bottle and throw it away when it is litter in
your own yard or in the yard of somewhere where you are responsible? It's not it's part of picking
up litter it doesn't even have the alcohol in it
		

			so now the guy's got a lovely picture. And guess what? He's making a killing out of it and he's
enjoying it in the meantime, people are starting to say stop for Allah this guy stopped God Allah
this guy for innocence man comes to the masjid with such a lovely heart and people look at him as
though he is the fraud of frauds. Look at this hippo crypt. He's coming to the first step but he's I
got I got evidence against him with photos. That is handling the bottles La Ilaha illa Allah part of
your story is actually a tale and the other part is all false love Akbar what a great guy What a
lovely person you need him in your society actually, he'll help clear up everywhere around. So Allah
		

			tells you it's not bad for you. It's good for you. Allah told our Isha the Allahu Allah and Abu
Bakr, Siddiq Radi Allahu Allah and the Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Sallam Lata Cebu who shall run
the company who were Pharaoh, look, I don't think this is bad for you. This is good for you. Why?
Why? Why when people spread rumor about you and I, it's good for us. Allah is saying it's good for
you. Don't worry, it's not bad for you. But how am a human I'm struggling and suffering as a result
of all of this. How can it be good for me? The question is, what do you want? What is ultimate
success? You're a believer, right? What is ultimate success? Is it not Jana? Is it not paradise,
		

			your ultimate success? Yes. Well, if you're going to get paradise through negatives that might
happen to you on earth, at least you arrived at the price that you were looking for, for the
hereafter. You've got Janna, maybe not because you were so regular with all the good deeds but
because someone wronged you to the degree that Allah says don't worry, it's good for you. We'll give
you Jana. Then on that Day, what will happen? You can have the last laugh.
		

			The Quran speaks about how the kuffaar laugh at the muslimeen and Allah says familia woman levena
monomial conferring him hugging Allah, or
		

			go on that day the men in the muslimeen will have the opportunity to laugh at the kuffaar while
reclining on their little sofas mashallah declining on the sofa, hahaha, to who? To those who did
the HA in the dunya against you, Allahu Akbar. And Allah says, Look at what's happened now,
Mashallah.
		

			A lot of us might say, well, you know what, it's not a matter of me laughing or not. I just want
Jana. I tell people, I need one meter squared in paradise if I got that burger, the world Allahu
Akbar, they goes so never mind what they are saying. They will continue saying they have to be if
they speak about you, they spoke about better people than you worse things than they are saying
about you. So if you think you've got the wrong end of the stick, trust me, they got it even worse,
but what what How did they manage it? They managed it with faith. The moral of what I'm saying today
when people think negative of you as a decent person, and you know, you're trying and you know,
		

			you've tried to make amends and you know,
		

			You've tried to reach out and you've tried to bend this way in that way to accommodate as much as
you can. But you're a human Don't worry, though you tried your best Don't worry leave it to Allah
it's good for you it's good that they don't like you know not everyone needs to like you if they
didn't like the Prophet peace be upon him Where on earth do you think they're gonna like you and I
they look at you and they just judge you based on your clothing Hey, this guy looks a bit extreme.
Just stay away callous. It's okay, it's fine. But when you get stuck down the road, the only guy is
going to come to help you is the same guy you thought of that? negative thought? That's what
		

			happens. It happens by default. A lot of the times that's Allah's way of doing things don't worry.
We judge people today Wallahi we judge May Allah forgive me Wallahi we judge May Allah forgive me
remember I said that because I'm also a human. You look at someone and you look at the way they look
and immediately you've already got so much happening a close your windows, man relax. I know in
South Africa, you gotta close your windows anyway. Mashallah, but if you're looking at someone and
automatically giving them a judgmental look, you need help.
		

			These people here that we have next to you and those you interact with on a daily basis. They are
your brothers and sisters, Allah is testing you. That's why he made it compulsory for all of you to
come to the masjid Friday, you have to come you have no option and you're going to sit next to not
who you choose. You're going to sit next to him. Allah chooses go easy on them. Allah placed them
right next to you.
		

			I remember one day I was in the masjid. Allah may Allah forgive me.
		

			And I went into the SFX and the brother next to me had a strong smell of two things that came out.
One was cigarettes that I picked up myself. It was too strong. It was like, perhaps chain maybe it's
so many boxes a day, whatever it might have been, oh, maybe he works at a store. In fact, let's
think positive. Okay, maybe he works at a store. Where the the it's a smoking lounge, ALLAH forgive.
But secondly, I later got to know that that's the smell of weed. Allahu Akbar. It was this we call
it a clunk. You know, it was a smell. It was so far all Allahu Akbar. You know what I'm saying? It
was so foul. And I'm thinking what should I do? I'm saying Allahu Akbar. I broke my salah. And I
		

			walked off, and I went away. I did the other side of the stuff. I felt so bad. Later on later, on
some time later, when I started talking, and I started addressing people and so on. I actually went
back to this brother and said, my man, do you remember the day I went? He said, Well, Allah, he was
the best thing you could have done because after that, I quit smoking.
		

			I'm going to apologize to him to say I felt bad that you know what, actually, I had to walk away. I
couldn't stand the smoke. You know what he told me? You're not the first guy who did it. Allahu
Akbar. So I'm busy thinking to myself that as much as we say we have to interact with the people
next to us in a beautiful way. As much as we say we have to interact with them. Ask yourself, Am I
in a position that those around me would actually be pleased to interact with a guy like me Majan I
come to the masjid I'm smelling. If the Hadith says onions is a problem. Garlic is a problem and
that's some top food man. That is some top food. If that is a problem and the Hadith says you've had
		

			that go and wash your mouth. You know why you're going to harm the angels before the rest of the
people. You come into the masjid wash your mouth, clean yourself. You know, I tell people use under
arm I'm a human being. You have a shower and you don't use under arm and your person who sweats
Wallah, you're going to create a disaster in the masjid in the house of Allah. Because you're going
to come and you know what people might not want to stand next to they can't wait for the salah to be
over. That's the Hadith speaking about onions and garlic. And I'm telling you that it also goes
beyond that to perspiration. Imagine we talking about it from the house of Allah. The reason is, we
		

			need to gather we need to get together we need to love each other, give people reason to love you
not to hate you, then if they want to hate you, it's okay. It's better for you. It's not bad. But if
you were the reason then come at let's address the matter. Let's address them because sometimes we
are the problem I'm the problem sometimes. May Allah Almighty grant us ease and goodness, may Allah
Almighty help us so that whenever people judge us in whatever way and whatever they see the
negatives, May Allah help us go through it. Because when Allah He it's a challenge. Everyone goes
through it on their level. And I'm sure like I said, every single one of us, I'm sure we've been
		

			judged wrongly by this one and that one, so go easy on others as well have a good perception of
people. Not everything that you see is actually the way you see it before we used to say Seeing is
believing. Today, you've got to find out because when you see things online, it can be totally
artificially created completely, the voice and the video, it can be totally artificially created.
And then you're using that against an individual or people are using it against you. It's going to
be painful. I want to end off by telling you the reason why Allah says it's better for you
		

			When people do this for you, is because the supper and the patience is good, it will refine you, you
get Jana, and at the same time Allah Almighty softens your heart and elevates your status to the
degree that you will already have such a beautiful magnificent presence in this dunya and those who
are willing or those who are going to appreciate it will definitely feel that may Allah subhanahu
Attallah use us to do good in our homes. We are coming into the run up of Ramadan as I close I just
want to say let's purify ourselves before Ramadan normally to seek forgiveness before Ramadan is
actually very important because we want to enter the month as pure as possible. Don't think because
		

			Ramadan is a month of forgiveness. I can commit my lessons right up to the end the moon is sighted
and I'll stop No no no. From now we we turn to Allah. You will have a blessed Ramadan, you will have
a beautiful month May Allah bless us. Remember, bear in mind, just recently, we were unable to even
sit the way we are here right now in the masjid thank Allah a billion times and one of the means and
ways of thinking him is to make sure you make the most of it because we know how it feels when it
was not there. We had almost two Ramadan where we struggled and we suffered one of them was worse
than the other. But at the same time, here's Ramadan coming. Let's plan for it in a beautiful way.
		

			And we fill up the masajid and we ensure that Allah Almighty is mercy descends on us because we're
seeking His forgiveness. Day and night Akula Kohli had also Allahu wa salam ala Nabina Muhammad