Mufti Menk – Harm of Being a Perfectionist

			Salam Alaikum, my brothers and sisters, those of us who like perfection, and we want to see
everything in a specific order, smart, clean, neat, and orderly. Remember, not everyone is like
that, in fact, very few people are like that. So it would become very difficult to live with others.
Because a lot of the people may not be as particular as you are for those things. So, remember to
adjust don't take these things too seriously because one, people will begin to dislike you. Number
two, you will become so agitated and irritated. It may make you say words that are hurtful, or it
might even stress you and depress you. So from time to time, no problem. If things are all strong,
		

			if things might not be orderly, if things are not neat, if things might be a little bit dirty, if
the children come in with a lot of mud and sand and dirt. Once in a while. That's okay, it's fine.
And SubhanAllah. When you want to live with people, you need to understand that they may be
different, different temperament I know of people who get married, they were perfectionists, but
their spouses are not. And then they begin to have a problem out of nothing. You need to realize not
everyone is going to be on your level. So don't be hard and fast. You may continue to be neat and
clean. Obviously, we all are to a great degree, but not everyone is upon your level of meekness and
		

			orderliness. So, take it easy. You don't want to create enemies you don't want to come across as a
person whom no one wants to live with. No one wants to interact with, you might find yourself
yelling and screaming everyday, people might dislike you with a passion. Those who live you who live
with you may not want to actually live with you in reality, but they're forced to. So take it easy.
Take it easy relax. When you marry when you have your children when you're living with your
siblings, with relatives, with perhaps a roommate, whoever it may be, they will be different from
you learn to adjust. And if you want to teach someone you want to guide them, you can lovingly
		

			remind them but remember, it's not wrong not to be a perfectionist so Han Allah, so therefore take
it easy. I thought I'd say this because many people are struggling. They want everything to be
perfect. There are so hard on their children, sometimes on their spouses, it creates mental health
issues in some and Subhanallah we could avoid this life is not all about having things in a specific
way all the time. Sometimes you just have to let it be. May Allah grant us is a Salam aleikum wa
rahmatullah