Mufti Menk – Finding Excuses for others!

			Kamala Khan, I'm just starting this live session again, okay, because we were interrupted earlier,
the topic was finding excuses for someone when they've done something. And I was trying to explain
that having a good photo of someone when they've done something that's not criminal is actually an
act of worship, it's a duty that you have, you know, regarding someone else, for example, and I was
giving this example, if you see a person coming out of a pub, for example, the first thought that
crosses your mind should not be a dirty one. And that's where we A lot of us fail. The first thought
we have is dirty, filthy. You know, you see someone, for example, helping a woman or traveling with
		

			a woman, etc, you don't have to think that they're, they're in bed, you know, you don't have to
think Stanford, that they're doing something Haram. But the first line of thinking should be clean
thinking. And if it doesn't concern you, you can forget about it and stop at that clean thinking and
let it be, that's called who's no one, you know, to have the good perception of someone else. But
if, for example, it concerns you, then you can take it deeper, you can actually find out and you can
go a little bit deeper until you you're you confirm whether it was actually that good intention, or
that goodness, or it was something deeper, if it doesn't affect you, and you happen to to see
		

			another sign that proved to you beyond any doubt whatsoever, that it was a bad thing, then it takes
it to that level. But if there is any doubt whatsoever, we're taught that you need to give the
person the benefit of that doubt, remember this, you need to give them the benefit of that doubt.
Now, like I say, this is not to cover up abuse, it's not to cover up criminal behavior. But it's
generally when a person has done something that doesn't hold a lot of weight, and it becomes gossip,
it becomes evil thoughts, it becomes bad in terms of the way you thinking of someone, then you need
to rectify that you need to correct it. It's my perception. When I see you say something, I
		

			shouldn't think the worst things you know, unfortunately on Earth right now, we love gossip. And
it's something juicy that we we just want to spread we want to be news breakers. So if you can't
break the news, if you cannot break the news, you get bored, and you start creating things and you
start making mountains out of molehills. Now, that is terrible. It's not the quality of a believer,
you need to know that. As a believer. You don't have to break news you don't have to start
gossiping, talking about people and making it out that you're the person who knows the latest of
everything that doesn't even concern you. The Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him has said the sign
		

			of the true submission of a person who calls himself a submitter is that he or she does not engage
in that which does not concern him or her. They leave it it doesn't concern me it's gone. If you can
help someone you help them, if you cannot help them, leave them alone, pray for them think good of
them. But don't think bad of a person. So then the ration that some people quote saying you need to
find 70 excuses for someone. It's not an aeration of the Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him. It's a
statement of some of the scholars have a full time, it's even taken back to some of the you know,
the the great generations. But
		

			yes, what it means is that you need to think good of someone, you know, you do find an excuse for a
person, when it's not something criminal or abusive or hurtful, etc. Someone swears you and they
keep swearing you and you say oh, I must find 70 excuses. I must wait until they swim is 71 times,
then I can say no more excuse. That's foolish Come on. So what you have to do is make sure that you
have a make sure that you have a clean heart, and you look at others with that clean heart, just
like you would like someone to look at you with goodness, you need to look at them with goodness,
the problem is, a lot of the times we do things without good intention. So therefore, we
		

			automatically look at others and think that they don't have the good intentions just because we
would have been that bad way. If it were us. Now that's a weakness, that's a weakness. So to work on
ourselves first and make sure that you have clean intentions, you will automatically believe that
others have clean intentions as well. Very interesting, right? So this was just a clarification
because people have been asking me about the so called hadith of finding 70 excuses and they say
look, doesn't it cover up abuse? And isn't it that you know, we would suffer if we kept on thinking
good if people know if it's connected to your suffering, you don't even have to think any good. You
		

			need to tackle that. If someone swears you abuses, you stolen your wealth done something wrong to
you, usurps your rights and keeps on you know, exploiting you. You need to make sure you don't just
look for excuses for that exploitation. You deal with it. So Hannah law, may Allah grant us ease.
But if a person happens to be
		

			doing something else, you know, you don't
		

			have to think the worst of them. Like I've given you one or two examples, there are a lot of other
examples, you know, someone gets 100% in the exam, you don't have to think they cheated, look for
something which they worked hard, even though they don't normally get that result, but they've got
it. If people have scored goals or played cricket and won, you don't have to think that there was
match fixing. That's what we mean, when we say, you know, think good find a good excuse to think
good about people. So they played it and they want, you know, people have a lot of money Don't say
that they dealing in drugs. That's what people do. Are they doing something illegal? It's not
		

			necessarily that that would happen, the first line of thought should be the cleanest line of
thought, If after that, it is proven beyond doubt that indeed, they did something that was
clandestine. In that particular case, you may then, you know, go to that level, like I said, but
this the moral of what I said this evening is, let's think good about each other. Let's try and
learn to love each other. Let's try and learn to think good things, even if someone's made a
mistake, are you going to correct them or you're going to make matters worse, and this is why when I
have a problem with someone, I promise you if they're dear to me, even if they're in another city or
		

			country, I sometimes would travel to them, I would listen them, Listen from them, hear them out, so
to speak, clarify and maybe give them advice, and let them know what I feel about it as a friend as
as an acquaintance, someone who cares for them. And then I'll go back. That's it. That's Islam.
		

			The difficulty with us, we think the worst things, we remove people from faith based on something
that we haven't even spoken to them about. We haven't clarified things, but that's what's happening.
It's a disease. We claim that it's it's part of what Allah has taught us and Allah expects from us,
but that's not true. We need to understand if it affects you. And if that your right has been
usurped, and you're being abused. In that case, yes, indeed. You may want to claim that right? You
may want to question etc. But if it's not concerning you leave it alone. And if it is concerning the
oma at large, you may clarify it firsthand, not secondhand, never, ever secondhand. first hand
		

			clarification, if you're not prepared to make a first hand clarification, you should not even
comment. Maybe Almighty bless us all. And may we be protected from the harm of our own tongues, and
our own systems because we do it to others, it's done to us and that way we're failing. Allah bless
you all. Have a lovely evening for those of you who might be where it is evening, and those of you
who are aware it is morning, Australia and the likes. May Allah bless you with a beautiful,
beautiful Sunday. And those of you who are still going to, you know, still having the afternoon of
Saturday, or the day of Saturday, America. May Allah grant your blessings as well. In a nutshell,
		

			maybe you will be blessed. I mean, salaam aleikum wa Taala