Mufti Menk – Dawah Between Leniency And Harshness!

Mufti Menk
Share Page

AI: Summary ©

The importance of leniency and respectful communication is emphasized in Islam. A softer approach is necessary when dealing with people practicing Islam, as it is necessary to gauge the person one is talking to and ask them to remind them of their actions. The importance of learning and practicing certain behaviors is also emphasized, as it is necessary to avoid harming one's Islam or causing negative consequences. The speaker emphasizes the need for a balanced approach, avoiding harming one's Islam or causing negative consequences, and acknowledging and reminding people of mistakes made by others. The importance of culture and shaping behavior is also emphasized.

AI: Summary ©

00:00:04 --> 00:00:27
			Assalamu alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh. My brothers and sisters Bismillah Alhamdulillah wa
Salatu was Salam ala rasulillah, Allah, Allah, he was happy as mine. I'm not too sure if the sound
is going to be clear, I'm using a different gadget this afternoon. And the topic is, as you can see,
		
00:00:28 --> 00:01:28
			the dour calling towards goodness calling towards Allah calling towards the dean, should it be
lenient? Or how hard? Should it be? Should there be a soft approach? Or should it be harsh? And we
need to understand that there are definitely different ways of calling people towards Allah subhanho
wa Taala. But the message is one, the methods are always going to differ. My beloved brothers and
sisters, we need to realize that Allah subhanho wa Taala has asked us to convey the message. And
it's our duty to call people towards goodness, when we call people towards goodness, we must be
lenient. That's the awesome and awesome, also meaning the original teachings, you know, you see
		
00:01:28 --> 00:02:17
			someone, you meet someone, you hear about someone you want to call someone, you must speak to them
with great respect. And with leniency with a soft tone in a beautiful way, the evidence of it is
filled in the Quran and the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. So each person has a
different temperament, both the color, and those who are being called, they all have a different
temperament. So if you take a look at the people who are the colors, the scholars that do arts,
someone who wants to call others towards goodness, not everyone has the same temperament or the
character. Some people are hard and harsh by nature, naturally, they are hard. The way they talk is
		
00:02:17 --> 00:03:10
			harsh. They will get across to different people, those who are impressed by a hard harsh message,
you know, there are some people, if you were to talk to them very softly and leniently. Perhaps they
may not take heed. So they would need a harder message, who are those people we're going to get to
that. But they originally were taught to speak to everyone number one with respect, that's never
compromised. Even if someone disrespects you. We as Muslims are taught to, not to disrespect them in
return, but rather to respectfully express our dissatisfaction, our anger, or whatever else, it may
be our disagreement, we must do so in a very respectful way. So if you want to call people towards
		
00:03:10 --> 00:03:57
			goodness, leniency is one thing, but being respectful is another. So risk, being respectful is never
going to be compromised. But when it comes to the issue of being soft, the issue of being very
lenient, that is the the way it should start. And then as you progress, you're beginning to get the
feel of what response you're getting. And sometimes people may not respond. And sometimes it depends
who you're calling. If, for example, there are people out there who have never harmed Islam, they
have never attacked the Muslim meme. They have never blast themed, any of that which is sacred to
the Muslim mean, obviously, they're literally innocent people out there who perhaps don't know about
		
00:03:57 --> 00:04:47
			Islam or are waiting for clarifications, waiting for a lot of other teachings and so on from you.
And I, that would be something very, very interesting and important. If we were to speak to them in
a correct way we would clear their misconceptions or their ignorance, we would actually inform them
of what is right and what is wrong. So that should happen in the most beautiful way. Then you have
someone who is showing you greater interest perhaps they have come a little bit closer. In that
particular case, you will notice a change in your approach in a certain way not to say your
character or conduct is going to drop in terms of level nor your respect. The respect you have for
		
00:04:47 --> 00:04:59
			yourself as well as for others needs to be maintained. But sometimes you might speak to them in more
detail. You might have you know, an approach that is slightly different ways.
		
00:05:00 --> 00:05:50
			comes to a person who, who has harmed Islam who is attacking, and who is maybe blaspheming, etc.
Initially, very respectfully, we've got to remind them in a very polite way. Look at the pharaoh
when Musa alayhis salam was sent to him, he was told to remind him in a beautiful way, maybe Allah
says, We attend a workshop, perhaps he might take heed, or he might be conscious of Allah fearful,
or he might change his ways, yet Allah knew that this man is never going to change a lot already
knew. But he instructed his messenger May peace be upon them all, to be very polite and very kind.
So initially, if you were to look at the message that is given to these people who are hurting
		
00:05:50 --> 00:06:35
			Islam, harming Islam, or engaged in grave injustice, it needs to be a firm, polite, beautiful
message evidence based, which is actually convincing. And at the same time, we're not going to just
submit, you know, defeat and so on, or pretend like we're the downtrodden underdogs weaklings, no,
no, no, no, respectfully, and yet very politely put the message across. However, when you find
someone on the offensive, and they're really attacking, then you may you may choose, you will have
to choose what is the most appropriate at that particular time. So, you will find some people might
tell you that,
		
00:06:36 --> 00:06:43
			to use an approach with this person that you are using is very, very light. In fact, it's not going
to have an impact,
		
00:06:44 --> 00:07:36
			you have to be a little bit harder, a little bit more firm, you have to perhaps counter their attack
with another attack, you know, that would do much more help in up in particular cases. So you need
to study the cases, how will your message fare with this person whom you are delivering it to, and
at the same time, respond to their, you know, attack on yourself or on Islam? Mainly, if you look at
the prophets of Salaam, he never responded to attack on his person, but rather attack on Islam on
Allah subhanho wa Taala those who bless him the message etc. They will respond to but anyone who did
a personal attack, I shall the law says in the Hadith, that Manta karma Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi
		
00:07:36 --> 00:07:48
			wa sallam, Molina, never did he take retribution for him for himself, but it was more for the sake
of Allah, or where Allah subhanho wa Taala, actually
		
00:07:50 --> 00:08:12
			was being insulted and so on. Then he chose a different approach, which was harder, he even issued
warnings, and he went to war at a certain point, not once, but several times. And that was after
warnings and for for many, many reasons. So we need to understand the approach that is being the
approach that is,
		
00:08:13 --> 00:08:58
			you know, used, the method that is employed, needs to be in line with, it needs to be in line with
the person that you're talking to what they've done, and so on. So we ask Allah subhanho wa Taala to
grant us ease sometimes, especially in today's world, there are so many people out there who are
confused, Muslims who don't know much about Islam, people who haven't been practicing people who
don't know much, and so on. So, if you take a look at those, how to talk to them, I would prefer a
softer approach because initially, you're calling people towards Allah subhanho wa Taala, reminding
them and guiding them. a softer approach does not mean you don't want you want them of Hellfire, you
		
00:08:58 --> 00:09:41
			want them of the everlasting Hellfire, you want them of all sorts of things, but you make sure that
it is done in a beautiful way that is going to be digested by people. Now, if you see someone who is
more practicing To be honest, your approach can be a little bit harder with them, because they're,
they're already coming through. So a person who is practicing and you want to remind them, Hey,
don't go back on whatever you have and you need to polish x, y and Zed all we need to study this and
study that etc. With you know, if I enter a machine and I see all people who are I'm going to give
you an example. A whole lot of people in the machine all bedded and what and you know, you have
		
00:09:41 --> 00:09:59
			people who relatively look like they're practicing, I promise you the tone of my lecture would be a
little bit harder. But if you're walking into a university where people are, some are Muslims, some
are not a lot may not appear to be practicing. And we're just talking from appearances. Not to say
we're judging them, but
		
00:10:00 --> 00:10:41
			Just to try and gauge the approach that is required in that particular case, if you're going to Doom
everyone and kick them out of the dean and make like, they're all going to * anyway, it will, you
will not be able to get across to the bulk of them. But if you were to use a softer approach, talk
to them, you know, someone who's not practicing, try to help them come, inch by inch, step by step
closer, closer, closer to Allah. And that would be much more beneficial than to just go in and use
the same approach with everyone. The prophet SAW, Selim himself never used that same approach with
with different people, when they were different people use different approaches. In fact, he even
		
00:10:41 --> 00:11:25
			told us to be careful of how we speak to people, everyone must be spoken to, according to their
level, I live in Abu Dhabi, about the Allahu anhu also echoed those teachings. And he said, You
speak to people according to their understanding what they know. So sometimes people tell me, I'm
too lenient? Well, I tell you what, leniency is a very good quality, it is an awesome, it is the
original quality to be soft in your approach. But you need to know when to be hard, I can be really
hard at times. But with whom? That's the question with who that is the question. So it depends.
Nowadays, like I say, because we are witnessing so much of change across the globe, the bulk of the
		
00:11:25 --> 00:11:48
			people out there literally want to know what's right and wrong, how are you going to be able to
teach them when there is nothing that is going to inspire them towards listening to what you have to
say, if you begin with abuse, and you swear their mothers and fathers and you actually think that
that's the dean, you call them, whatever other names you want. And there is a lot of this type of,
		
00:11:49 --> 00:11:58
			you know, name calling that is happening at the moment, which is chasing people away from the team.
So for myself, What I do know is,
		
00:12:00 --> 00:12:29
			when we are speaking to people, we have to make sure that we employ the best possible approach the
best method, and where it is required to be hard. You need to be a little bit hard and even a little
harsh at times. But you need to know that you must study every individual and every case, what works
in one community may not work in another community, you find certain communities are very, very,
		
00:12:30 --> 00:13:09
			you know, practicing, for example, you may have to be very hard if you go into those communities,
and you just have a light speech where you're telling people you know, and by the way, you know,
guys, don't worry, you can relax, take it easy, you guys are good. You guys are praying anyway. So
everything is good. And Mashallah, it's nice, you know, in that case, you have not done justice to
them, Your duty is to help them gain even greater closeness to Allah. So you need to be harder,
speak about more detailed items with them speak about that, which is more than what they are already
doing. You know, the five daily prayers are there, let's speak about the sooner and the nothing,
		
00:13:10 --> 00:13:32
			because you're already doing the follow up. But when you're speaking to someone who is not on the
phone, and they're not fulfilling their basic duties in that case, how can you start speaking about
the novel and the sooner when you know that that hasn't even, you know, they haven't even arrived at
that level. So my brothers and sisters, it's important for us to actually
		
00:13:34 --> 00:13:55
			understand this, you know, the community, you're speaking to the people you're speaking to, and
speak to them according to that particular level that they're on. And the idea is to get them better
and better. You know, when someone comes to you seeking help, and you see that they're in the top,
and you know, they already have
		
00:13:56 --> 00:13:58
			very modest outward dressing.
		
00:13:59 --> 00:14:48
			And if there is another person who is nowhere near that, I mean, to be able to use the same approach
with both the idea is to get everyone including ourselves to a much higher level to the best
possible level we can but you won't be able to get across to the one who is further away when you
talk language that they wouldn't even comprehend or understand. So we need to strike a balance and
to be honest, the bulk of it needs to be filled with leniency and softness in approach, and
goodness, kindness, tolerance to a great degree, and a lot of patience. You need to have a lot of
patience. But when it comes to the harshness look at the Pharaoh, as much as Mousavi Salaam prayed
		
00:14:48 --> 00:15:00
			against him. He never ever insulted him. He never disrespected him even though he claimed to be a
god. The same with the Prophet Mohammed Salah Salah as much as he disagreed with Abuja.
		
00:15:00 --> 00:15:02
			And as much as he,
		
00:15:04 --> 00:15:50
			you know, disagreed with the cronies who had attacked him, he did not issue insults. And he did not,
you know, rub salt on the wound, so to speak, because the idea is this message is higher than those
characteristics. But there were times when the hypocrites who had damaging Islam who were causing
damage from within the approach was much harder with them. And the professor seldom actually warned
them. And Subhanallah it was it was a very different approach from the Prophet sallallahu alayhi
wasallam. So let's try and understand this. I know there are people who say a lot, and who speak a
lot I personally believe and this is what I wanted to say that everyone's approach is applicable, if
		
00:15:50 --> 00:16:33
			I am soft by nature, don't expect me to have a hard approach, if someone is very hard by nature,
don't expect them to have a soft approach. But there are some who are who have both qualities from
Allah, we all have different qualities, some of us are more patient than others, some of us have a
greater tolerance level than other than others. So if that is the case, then we definitely need to
acknowledge that Allah made us with different characteristics. Not everyone were the prophets of
Allah. So not everyone is going to be able to have a quality that you think they need to have.
Sometimes they will be soft in their approach. So what would happen is, you will have others who
		
00:16:33 --> 00:17:19
			will be hard in their approach, who will then create the balance, you see, sometimes the balance is
in one person. And sometimes the balance is in a number of people put together. And this is why I
see those in the demo who are harsh and hard, we need them. But they will have an impact on a
certain category of people, those who are more lenient and patient, we need them, and they will have
an impact on others. Today on the globe, we're going through so much people are doubting their own
beliefs, people are questioning things, we need to have answers, not everyone is actually going to
be on your level or mine. May Allah subhanho wa Taala, grant us good Miss and ease. This is just a
		
00:17:19 --> 00:17:40
			session I thought I would go live for. And perhaps if the sound is good enough, maybe we can do a
few more lives at some point. Otherwise, we'll have to stick to the premiering of the pre recorded
videos. Instead of doing a live the opportunities we get to actually read your comments.
		
00:17:41 --> 00:18:31
			Much better than if we were to read comments posted later on. So this is why May Allah subhanho wa
Taala grant every one of us ease and goodness. Remember, when you speak to people, make sure you
know who you're speaking to. And make sure whatever method you're going to employ is going to be
effective, it's going to actually have the desired impact on the person or the people whom you're
addressing, be respectful, I don't see why a person should not be respectful and try and understand
that others who have a different approach are not necessarily wrong. Those who have a different
approach from yours, are not necessarily wrong. They just have different nature given by Allah, they
		
00:18:31 --> 00:18:42
			perhaps would impact on different categories of people. And I still do believe that Allison and I've
confirmed this with many scholars, many people,
		
00:18:43 --> 00:19:32
			and even, you know, Reddit, throughout the CLR, throughout the Koran etc. And so, you know, the the
original method, the first the way to start, the methods of the original method is that which is
filled with a soft approach with leniency with kindness with tolerance with goodness. And then as
time progresses, and you're addressing different people who have reacted in different ways, or
people who have done different things, in that particular case, you would become a little bit harder
and at times even harsh with those whom that harshness is required. And that is what would impact
upon them more. So I pray that we understand this. I think it's the third time I'm repeating it, but
		
00:19:32 --> 00:19:39
			perhaps the reason is because I see more of us are joining this live session. In the meantime, my
brothers and sisters,
		
00:19:41 --> 00:19:43
			we need to pray for those who are
		
00:19:44 --> 00:19:48
			going through difficulty and hardship. There are people who are
		
00:19:50 --> 00:19:59
			losing faith because of the hardship that they're going through. And they are people who for
example, someone who is leading others astray.
		
00:20:00 --> 00:20:15
			Generally, the approach with them would be a little bit harder, because they're leading others
astray. A person who is just trying to learn a person who is trying to ask questions a person who
themselves might be, you know,
		
00:20:16 --> 00:21:01
			a stray, but they're not leading us astray. In that case, you would actually be the most lenient,
softest person to them, when someone is causing damage, you're going to have to stop that damage
somehow, you know, if someone is going around shooting people, you're someone is going to be have to
be brave enough to come and stop that person somehow. And that's, that's not gonna happen with a
soft approach. Hi, how are you, they will shoot you as well. So remember, this, my brothers and
sisters are each of each person and each situation requires its approach to be to know which
approach to employ is actually wisdom. And that wisdom, very few people have it. Sometimes a lot of
		
00:21:01 --> 00:21:23
			people have a lot of knowledge, but they don't have the know how, which says which method should I
employ, and they begin to attack and they begin to create more damage. The same would apply among
the scholars themselves, sometimes you find, we all know scholars are not prophets of Allah, okay?
scholars are not prophets of Allah.
		
00:21:24 --> 00:22:05
			So they will have weaknesses, they will have sins, all of them, they would have sins minuses mostly.
And so handler sometimes mistakes they would definitely make I make mistakes. I know that, and I
would never call myself perfect. I'm very far from that. But imagine what you're teaching is one
thing when you're teaching that which is wrong, yeah, you need to be called out for what you are
teaching that is wrong. And when you've done something within your private life that is wrong, then
people need to help you and guide you as a human being. If you have not taught that it's not their
teachings, for example, you find the person who teaches Koran, he teaches lovely Quran and so on.
		
00:22:05 --> 00:22:51
			And then you see him skip a red traffic light, may Allah protect us, what would you do? That doesn't
require a refutation? He didn't teach people to to skip a light he did. Let me give you another
example. A person who tells people to fulfill salam, and Mashallah, he's a guiding light. And one
day he misses his Salah, oh, he, you know, he didn't fulfill it in the proper way. say he missed it,
does it mean now I need to make a video to say this guy doesn't pray, you know, yet he only teaches
people about praying five times a day, because you notice something in his private life, that needed
correction, you don't go out in the public to correct his private personal mistake, where he is not
		
00:22:51 --> 00:23:18
			preaching and teaching that particular thing that is wrong. If someone tells you don't read the
Quran, they would be wrong. But if someone were to were to say, read the Koran, and understand it's
the word of Allah, and understand that it is sacred, and so on, and then you find they themselves
did not read it at a specific time. You know what you might want to remind them, Hey, brother,
you're not supposed to be doing this, you're supposed to be doing that. They might say, look, I made
a mistake. And you know what, it's not a public teaching.
		
00:23:19 --> 00:24:05
			But sometimes the way some of the trigger happy, refuses, come out and hunt for something in
someone's private life, to take out and bring to the fore. Nobody even knew about it, they exposed
it, thinking that, you know, we're going to nail this person or do justice to this particular
matter. When they didn't realize all you did was took a private matter that this person doesn't
teach doesn't stand by doesn't believe themselves, they might have fallen as a human in one or two
mistakes or sins. And now instead of helping them, you've actually come out and reduced the respect
that people had for them. And they're going to do it to you and to everyone else. So you're going to
		
00:24:05 --> 00:24:46
			be left with no scholars. I don't know a single scholar that has not been spoken bad about not even
one, name them from the east, to the west, from the north to the south, every single scholar they
have to be refuted, no matter who they are. They have to be spoken against no matter who they are.
Why? Because obviously they would be all sorts of people who are prepared to say, what opposes what
you're going to say they have to be people who don't like there are people who don't like the poor
and the sooner they don't like a lot of things. So you will have that but to be very fair, if a
person has not promoted that which is wrong, and they have not taught that which is wrong, and
		
00:24:46 --> 00:24:59
			whatever their they've made a mistake regarding if it is not the ingrained habit and quality. There
is absolutely no benefit at all. In fact, there is a harm in coming out and trying to expose
		
00:25:00 --> 00:25:41
			Things What did you expose? I mean, come on. That's crazy. So Carla, you brought to the fore
something, say, for example, you were walking in the mall, and you saw a scholar, and he happened to
slap his child. Or he happened to, you know, to say a bad word to his child or to his family member
or to sample. Surely, rather than create a video and get excited, which is not right. You know, this
person, teachers, goodness, they teach a lot of respect. They teach kindness, they must have had
their bad moment, or they might have, you know, made a mistake or fallen or whatever it may have
been. It's your duty, if you really care for them to go and remind them, and to tell them, You know
		
00:25:41 --> 00:26:21
			what, I heard what you said, and you know, I really felt it, because I wouldn't have expected that
from you. That's enough for that person's correction. But if you're going to make a video out of it,
and you're going to come out and say I saw so and so they were in the mall, and I saw them with
people, and he spoke very badly. He slapped his child, and he did this. Look at the hypocrite he is,
look at the time, you're obsessed with the guy. Leave him alone, may Allah subhanho wa Taala, grant
us ease, that doesn't solve the problem you've probably the brother has taught, or the shape or the
sister, whoever it may have been, has taught millions of people a lot of goodness. And what you try
		
00:26:21 --> 00:27:04
			to do now is you just wanted to create a blemish in that people will start doubting the good
teachings just because you created a video about the slapping or about whatever else it made a
personal mistake rather than address it so that it's not repeated again, or it's dealt with in a
beautiful way. This is something you need to think about. And I have seen some of I have seen some
really uncultured refute tests. And I can tell you, they have not had a good upbringing. Those who
have had a good upbringing, and they have their cultures, people, they would always do things,
thinking of a lot of factors before they say things or do things. But when you have someone who's
		
00:27:04 --> 00:27:45
			uncultured, probably they've just got guidance now than the other day. They used to be in the clubs
in the ghettos and they came on to the dean, they probably in a lot of cases will lie. I've seen it
and I can I am compiling stats to actually see how bad this has become. They would go to town with
the way they refute people and talk about reasonably good people in such a derogatory way. That it's
it's just it leaves a bad taste, to be honest with you. It goes to prove that they don't have a good
upbringing. They've come from the ghettos. When I say ghetto, I mean, they've come from not even
ghettos, they've come from a terrible life.
		
00:27:46 --> 00:28:28
			We need to understand this. culture is very important for as long as it does not contradict the
dean. In fact, the character and conduct taught in the dean, we're talking about harshness, and
we're taught people say no, you must be harsh, not at all. You must make sure that you know when to
be hard and harsh, you know what to expose, when to expose it. And when to correct a person. You
need to know the damage of what you are trying to do. You need to realize the damage of what you are
trying to do you really care for the deen in this way. I definitely doubt some people who would just
go on a refuting campaign. You know, recently I heard someone say, Oh, you must refute anything and
		
00:28:28 --> 00:29:09
			everything. Yes, I agree where there is deviance that is being taught you refuted without a doubt.
All of it, without a doubt. But when you come to an individual and the person, and you want to get
personal about them, be careful, because then on the Day of Judgment, it could just be the other way
around. When you want to get personal about people and make personal attacks on others. Be very,
very careful. This is what I'm talking about. You need to know if they've made a blunder if they've
said or did something. And that's not what they preach and promote. That's their own private error.
And if you would like you really care for them, you need to make sure you come reach out to them,
		
00:29:09 --> 00:29:52
			help them guide them. They're human, if I were to make a mistake, I wouldn't. I mean, I wouldn't be
happy if someone just you know, started creating a big video about something that was within my own
private life. Unfortunately, the world is full of cuckoos and you know what they do that so guys
like us have to just enjoy the video that's it and smile about it. Because there's nothing much
you're gonna do a May Allah subhanho wa Taala grant us goodness and ease and open outdoors and May
Allah subhanho wa Taala help us in every single way. I think I've spoken quite a lot. inshallah. I
hope to meet with you guys again at some point. I'm done in my half an hour of naziha that I wanted
		
00:29:52 --> 00:29:53
			to
		
00:29:54 --> 00:29:59
			give myself to begin with and then everyone else is done. And I'm not referring to anyone in
		
00:30:00 --> 00:30:25
			Particular I'm referring to everyone, including myself. This is the naseeha. There are so many
people serving all sorts of agendas, our agenda should be aligned is rational. And we should
carefully think of the damage that would be caused by what we do. And if we don't people have reason
to doubt us and our motives, and what we're actually trying to get to, because I'm finding more and
more
		
00:30:26 --> 00:30:39
			loss of respect of all scholars, all of them, loss of respect of all scholars across the board,
simply because people are spending their time doing all sorts of things and they're actually
		
00:30:40 --> 00:30:47
			attacking one another left, right and center without speaking on the point itself. Rather, it's
becoming
		
00:30:48 --> 00:30:58
			rather it's becoming personal and it's becoming really ugly. Now not bless you or does that Kamala
Harris akuto calmly Hello Salam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato.