Mirza Yawar Baig – What’s a Life Goal 2

Mirza Yawar Baig
Share Page

AI: Summary ©

The importance of researching and narrowing choices for a job is emphasized, with a focus on social media and empowering people to show up and stay true to their values. Consistent behavior is also crucial for a lifetime career and personal success, and affirming one's feelings and emotions is essential for happiness. The speaker provides advice on collecting and sharing data to determine a course of action, and emphasizes the importance of being mindful of one's behavior and not giving up on one's expectations.

AI: Summary ©

00:00:00 --> 00:00:04
			So, we're talking about the coming at or
		
00:00:04 --> 00:00:05
			deciding on your lifeboat.
		
00:00:06 --> 00:00:09
			And as I mentioned to you yesterday, or
		
00:00:09 --> 00:00:12
			not yesterday, I recorded yesterday but the last
		
00:00:12 --> 00:00:17
			episode on this, the first one, that I
		
00:00:17 --> 00:00:22
			suggested to you that you should narrow down
		
00:00:22 --> 00:00:27
			your choices to not more than two, two
		
00:00:27 --> 00:00:28
			different voices.
		
00:00:29 --> 00:00:34
			So, after that, what you do is as
		
00:00:34 --> 00:00:39
			much in-depth research about those choices as
		
00:00:39 --> 00:00:40
			you possibly can.
		
00:00:41 --> 00:00:46
			Research on different careers and so forth has
		
00:00:46 --> 00:00:52
			become now, thanks to the internet, thanks to
		
00:00:52 --> 00:00:55
			social media and so on, has become much
		
00:00:55 --> 00:00:56
			easier than it was.
		
00:00:58 --> 00:00:59
			So, utilize that.
		
00:00:59 --> 00:01:03
			Social media is generally harmful or negative but
		
00:01:03 --> 00:01:05
			in this case it's useful.
		
00:01:06 --> 00:01:09
			So, utilize that and we do as much
		
00:01:09 --> 00:01:11
			research as you can and find out about
		
00:01:11 --> 00:01:15
			the two career choices that you have narrowed
		
00:01:15 --> 00:01:16
			down to.
		
00:01:18 --> 00:01:20
			Once you have done that, part of that
		
00:01:20 --> 00:01:22
			research you should have come up with the
		
00:01:22 --> 00:01:27
			names of the top people in that profession
		
00:01:27 --> 00:01:29
			and they should be part of your research.
		
00:01:30 --> 00:01:31
			So, you would have...
		
00:01:31 --> 00:01:31
			you would have names.
		
00:01:33 --> 00:01:36
			Pick three top ones of that.
		
00:01:36 --> 00:01:39
			Now, these are people who are in effect
		
00:01:39 --> 00:01:40
			living your dream.
		
00:01:41 --> 00:01:43
			They have been there, done that, they have
		
00:01:43 --> 00:01:46
			achieved what you are setting out to achieve.
		
00:01:47 --> 00:01:50
			They are at the goal and you are
		
00:01:50 --> 00:01:53
			starting out on the path to get to
		
00:01:53 --> 00:01:53
			the goal.
		
00:01:55 --> 00:01:58
			Now, I'm not suggesting to you that these
		
00:01:58 --> 00:02:03
			people will give you, you know, their life
		
00:02:03 --> 00:02:07
			is exact copy or exact model of what
		
00:02:07 --> 00:02:09
			you should do with your life.
		
00:02:09 --> 00:02:09
			No.
		
00:02:10 --> 00:02:12
			But it's the closest that you're going to
		
00:02:12 --> 00:02:16
			get to that and you're looking at a
		
00:02:16 --> 00:02:17
			success model.
		
00:02:17 --> 00:02:19
			So, you're looking at somebody who's had done
		
00:02:19 --> 00:02:24
			that, who's struggled and who was successful.
		
00:02:24 --> 00:02:29
			So, obviously they will have wonderful things and
		
00:02:29 --> 00:02:31
			potentially they will have a lot to teach
		
00:02:31 --> 00:02:32
			you.
		
00:02:32 --> 00:02:33
			So, value.
		
00:02:34 --> 00:02:43
			So, take that and then contact them and
		
00:02:43 --> 00:02:46
			request to be allowed to shadow them.
		
00:02:48 --> 00:02:50
			Now, this is very important because you want
		
00:02:50 --> 00:02:53
			to get as much of a hands-on
		
00:02:53 --> 00:02:54
			experience...
		
00:02:54 --> 00:02:58
			as much of a hands-on experience of
		
00:02:58 --> 00:03:02
			the profession before you actually get into the
		
00:03:02 --> 00:03:02
			profession.
		
00:03:03 --> 00:03:05
			And the way to do that is to
		
00:03:05 --> 00:03:08
			shadow somebody who is in that profession.
		
00:03:09 --> 00:03:12
			So, if you want to become a, you
		
00:03:12 --> 00:03:15
			know, bus driver, for example, or say a
		
00:03:15 --> 00:03:18
			long-distance 16-wheeler truck driver.
		
00:03:19 --> 00:03:20
			So, before you actually get a truck license
		
00:03:20 --> 00:03:25
			and whatnot, ask one of the truckers if
		
00:03:25 --> 00:03:27
			you can ride with him.
		
00:03:29 --> 00:03:34
			And my experience of people is that most
		
00:03:34 --> 00:03:38
			people who are successful are very open to
		
00:03:38 --> 00:03:43
			sharing their lives and their struggles and their
		
00:03:43 --> 00:03:49
			goals with anyone who is genuinely interested in
		
00:03:49 --> 00:03:50
			listening to them.
		
00:03:50 --> 00:03:52
			And please notice my words.
		
00:03:53 --> 00:03:54
			Genuinely interested.
		
00:03:54 --> 00:03:56
			Not somebody who is sort of passing by.
		
00:03:56 --> 00:03:57
			No.
		
00:03:57 --> 00:03:58
			Genuinely interested.
		
00:03:58 --> 00:04:01
			So, you need to convince that person that
		
00:04:01 --> 00:04:05
			you are truly interested in learning from them.
		
00:04:07 --> 00:04:09
			Once you convince them, and it doesn't take
		
00:04:09 --> 00:04:13
			long, anyone worth his salt will figure out
		
00:04:13 --> 00:04:17
			in the first, you know, thirty seconds of
		
00:04:17 --> 00:04:18
			your conversation whether you're serious or not.
		
00:04:19 --> 00:04:22
			So, then request to shadow them.
		
00:04:24 --> 00:04:26
			As I mentioned, people are very willing and
		
00:04:26 --> 00:04:27
			open to that.
		
00:04:27 --> 00:04:30
			And once they agree, then you shadow them
		
00:04:30 --> 00:04:32
			and do it for a few days, maybe
		
00:04:32 --> 00:04:34
			a week or so, because otherwise you don't
		
00:04:34 --> 00:04:39
			get a clear idea of that profession.
		
00:04:39 --> 00:04:41
			Especially if it's something you want to do,
		
00:04:41 --> 00:04:44
			it would seem very exciting and nice to
		
00:04:44 --> 00:04:47
			begin with, and before you can come to
		
00:04:47 --> 00:04:50
			the painful aspects of it, which every single
		
00:04:50 --> 00:04:52
			profession has, you would have got out and
		
00:04:52 --> 00:04:54
			you would have got out with a wrong
		
00:04:54 --> 00:04:54
			impression.
		
00:04:54 --> 00:04:55
			So, you don't want to do that.
		
00:04:55 --> 00:04:58
			You want to make sure that you understand
		
00:04:58 --> 00:04:58
			it fully.
		
00:04:59 --> 00:05:00
			And to understand it fully, you need to
		
00:05:00 --> 00:05:01
			be…
		
00:05:01 --> 00:05:02
			to have enough of an experience.
		
00:05:03 --> 00:05:04
			One week is still not enough, but it's
		
00:05:04 --> 00:05:05
			the best you can do.
		
00:05:06 --> 00:05:08
			So, ask for that.
		
00:05:09 --> 00:05:14
			And then, that one week must be the
		
00:05:14 --> 00:05:17
			most serious week of your life.
		
00:05:18 --> 00:05:23
			Be very, very serious with them and with
		
00:05:23 --> 00:05:27
			their time, because their time is valuable.
		
00:05:28 --> 00:05:31
			And for you, it's something which is even
		
00:05:31 --> 00:05:32
			more valuable.
		
00:05:32 --> 00:05:34
			So, don't treat that lightly.
		
00:05:35 --> 00:05:38
			They have taken the trouble to share their
		
00:05:38 --> 00:05:39
			life with you.
		
00:05:40 --> 00:05:42
			So, take it seriously.
		
00:05:43 --> 00:05:43
			Now, what does that mean?
		
00:05:43 --> 00:05:46
			In practice, it means that you show up
		
00:05:46 --> 00:05:47
			before they show up.
		
00:05:48 --> 00:05:51
			So, if their working hours begin at, depending
		
00:05:51 --> 00:05:53
			on who you are shadowing, if you are
		
00:05:53 --> 00:05:57
			shadowing, for example, a surgeon, most surgeons begin
		
00:05:57 --> 00:06:01
			their surgery very early in the morning, 5
		
00:06:01 --> 00:06:03
			a.m. So, if the surgeon is beginning
		
00:06:03 --> 00:06:06
			at 5 a.m., you make sure that
		
00:06:06 --> 00:06:10
			you are there well before that, and so
		
00:06:10 --> 00:06:11
			on.
		
00:06:11 --> 00:06:12
			And then, stick in there.
		
00:06:14 --> 00:06:16
			Don't say, I'm feeling hungry, or I am
		
00:06:16 --> 00:06:20
			tired, I need to take my afternoon nap,
		
00:06:21 --> 00:06:22
			or I need to run to mama for
		
00:06:22 --> 00:06:23
			my milk.
		
00:06:24 --> 00:06:24
			No.
		
00:06:26 --> 00:06:26
			Stick in there.
		
00:06:27 --> 00:06:28
			No complaints.
		
00:06:30 --> 00:06:33
			Where you need to, where you are with
		
00:06:33 --> 00:06:36
			them, for example, the surgeon takes you after
		
00:06:36 --> 00:06:39
			surgery, takes you to the cafeteria, pull out
		
00:06:39 --> 00:06:42
			your wallet, and pay for the coffee, or
		
00:06:42 --> 00:06:44
			pay for the lunch, or whatever you are
		
00:06:44 --> 00:06:45
			having.
		
00:06:45 --> 00:06:49
			If he stops you, then you might gracefully
		
00:06:49 --> 00:06:54
			accept his hospitality one time, but otherwise, always
		
00:06:54 --> 00:06:55
			be the first.
		
00:06:57 --> 00:07:00
			Open their car doors, pull out chairs for
		
00:07:00 --> 00:07:01
			them to sit, right?
		
00:07:02 --> 00:07:05
			Treat the whole thing as that this person
		
00:07:05 --> 00:07:09
			is doing you an enormous favor, and for
		
00:07:09 --> 00:07:11
			the duration of that week, you are their
		
00:07:11 --> 00:07:15
			servant, and you are honored that they took
		
00:07:15 --> 00:07:18
			you into their service.
		
00:07:18 --> 00:07:20
			So, you're not doing them a favor.
		
00:07:20 --> 00:07:22
			They are doing, and they have done a
		
00:07:22 --> 00:07:25
			favor to you, and you're trying to pay
		
00:07:25 --> 00:07:29
			it back to the extent possible, knowing full
		
00:07:29 --> 00:07:31
			well that you can never pay it back,
		
00:07:31 --> 00:07:34
			because they, it was their initiative, they agreed
		
00:07:34 --> 00:07:35
			in the first place.
		
00:07:35 --> 00:07:37
			Otherwise, you wouldn't be having this conversation in
		
00:07:37 --> 00:07:37
			the first place.
		
00:07:38 --> 00:07:39
			So, treat it with respect.
		
00:07:40 --> 00:07:41
			Treat them with respect.
		
00:07:41 --> 00:07:42
			Treat their time with respect.
		
00:07:43 --> 00:07:44
			This is very, very, very important.
		
00:07:47 --> 00:07:52
			I've had many cases where people ask to
		
00:07:52 --> 00:07:56
			be mentored, they ask to be coached, and
		
00:07:56 --> 00:07:59
			then they try to call the shots.
		
00:08:00 --> 00:08:03
			I have this very important thing that I
		
00:08:03 --> 00:08:04
			need to talk to you about.
		
00:08:04 --> 00:08:05
			Okay, fantastic.
		
00:08:06 --> 00:08:08
			Can I see you at 6 p.m.
		
00:08:08 --> 00:08:08
			on Wednesday?
		
00:08:10 --> 00:08:11
			I'm saying, what?
		
00:08:12 --> 00:08:14
			Can you see me at 6 p.m.
		
00:08:14 --> 00:08:15
			on Wednesday?
		
00:08:16 --> 00:08:18
			Now, whose need is it?
		
00:08:19 --> 00:08:20
			Your need or my need?
		
00:08:20 --> 00:08:22
			And you want to call the shots?
		
00:08:23 --> 00:08:25
			You want to tell me when I must
		
00:08:25 --> 00:08:26
			make myself available to you?
		
00:08:27 --> 00:08:28
			Come on, give me a break.
		
00:08:28 --> 00:08:29
			I wasn't born yesterday, right?
		
00:08:31 --> 00:08:34
			You ask me, when can I see you?
		
00:08:34 --> 00:08:37
			And if I tell you that I can
		
00:08:37 --> 00:08:39
			see you at 9 a.m. on Monday,
		
00:08:40 --> 00:08:41
			don't tell me, oh, but you know, that's
		
00:08:41 --> 00:08:42
			my working day.
		
00:08:43 --> 00:08:43
			Tough luck, brother.
		
00:08:44 --> 00:08:45
			I didn't ask to see you.
		
00:08:46 --> 00:08:47
			It's your working day?
		
00:08:47 --> 00:08:48
			Big deal.
		
00:08:49 --> 00:08:50
			So, take it off.
		
00:08:50 --> 00:08:54
			If it's so important for you, take a
		
00:08:54 --> 00:08:54
			day off.
		
00:08:55 --> 00:08:57
			Take two hours off, right?
		
00:08:58 --> 00:09:02
			Whatever, but don't dictate to me when you
		
00:09:02 --> 00:09:04
			want to be with me, when you want
		
00:09:04 --> 00:09:05
			to see me.
		
00:09:08 --> 00:09:10
			So, be very careful with that.
		
00:09:11 --> 00:09:13
			Don't blow it before it even begins.
		
00:09:15 --> 00:09:15
			Shadowing.
		
00:09:16 --> 00:09:20
			Now, one extremely important thing with shadowing, apart
		
00:09:20 --> 00:09:22
			from these things which I told you already,
		
00:09:22 --> 00:09:27
			what this is, that keep notes.
		
00:09:28 --> 00:09:30
			You might think you have a great memory,
		
00:09:30 --> 00:09:32
			you might even have a great memory, but
		
00:09:32 --> 00:09:34
			don't trust the memory.
		
00:09:35 --> 00:09:37
			Keep notes, because you want to take these
		
00:09:37 --> 00:09:39
			notes and you want to go over these
		
00:09:39 --> 00:09:44
			notes in detail, reflecting, like I mentioned the
		
00:09:44 --> 00:09:48
			last time, reflection, introspection, conceptualization.
		
00:09:48 --> 00:09:49
			So, you want to be able to do
		
00:09:49 --> 00:09:50
			all that.
		
00:09:50 --> 00:09:52
			And for that, it's essential that you take
		
00:09:52 --> 00:09:53
			copious notes.
		
00:09:54 --> 00:09:56
			So, keep a…
		
00:09:56 --> 00:09:56
			don't…
		
00:09:56 --> 00:09:59
			don't record conversations, because it is even illegal
		
00:09:59 --> 00:10:00
			in many places.
		
00:10:00 --> 00:10:02
			Don't take photographs without permission.
		
00:10:03 --> 00:10:05
			Just write down on a pad.
		
00:10:06 --> 00:10:08
			And that also, seek permission first.
		
00:10:08 --> 00:10:11
			I said to them that I would like
		
00:10:11 --> 00:10:13
			to make sure that I remember everything you
		
00:10:13 --> 00:10:14
			tell me, everything I see.
		
00:10:15 --> 00:10:17
			So, with your permission, can I take notes?
		
00:10:18 --> 00:10:19
			And everybody will say yes.
		
00:10:20 --> 00:10:21
			And then take notes.
		
00:10:23 --> 00:10:23
			Write down everything.
		
00:10:24 --> 00:10:24
			Don't…
		
00:10:24 --> 00:10:27
			don't think, oh, this is easy, this is
		
00:10:27 --> 00:10:27
			not important.
		
00:10:27 --> 00:10:28
			Write everything.
		
00:10:29 --> 00:10:30
			Write absolutely everything.
		
00:10:30 --> 00:10:33
			And then, request again, and this is part
		
00:10:33 --> 00:10:37
			of your, what I call the mentoring contract.
		
00:10:38 --> 00:10:42
			Request the person for some time, at the
		
00:10:42 --> 00:10:46
			end of the day, at their convenience, where
		
00:10:46 --> 00:10:50
			you can sit with them and debrief.
		
00:10:51 --> 00:10:53
			And you can ask them questions, ask for
		
00:10:53 --> 00:10:56
			clarifications, and so on.
		
00:10:56 --> 00:10:59
			So, at the end of the day, get
		
00:10:59 --> 00:11:00
			time to do that.
		
00:11:00 --> 00:11:01
			Debrief.
		
00:11:03 --> 00:11:06
			So, once you've done all of that, now
		
00:11:06 --> 00:11:09
			you are at a point where you have
		
00:11:09 --> 00:11:11
			enough data to be able to decide.
		
00:11:12 --> 00:11:14
			And this is also a time to decide.
		
00:11:15 --> 00:11:18
			Don't fall into the trap of trying to
		
00:11:18 --> 00:11:19
			get more and more and more and more
		
00:11:19 --> 00:11:22
			data, because you will just get confused.
		
00:11:23 --> 00:11:28
			There is a value in collecting data, and
		
00:11:28 --> 00:11:30
			there is a value…
		
00:11:30 --> 00:11:32
			and there is a negative value in collecting
		
00:11:32 --> 00:11:33
			too much data.
		
00:11:33 --> 00:11:36
			So, you need to have enough data, not
		
00:11:36 --> 00:11:37
			insufficient data.
		
00:11:37 --> 00:11:40
			But if you have too many things, then
		
00:11:40 --> 00:11:41
			it will only confuse you.
		
00:11:42 --> 00:11:44
			Accept and understand the fact that there is
		
00:11:44 --> 00:11:50
			always, no matter what, going to be uncertainty
		
00:11:50 --> 00:11:52
			in life.
		
00:11:52 --> 00:11:54
			This is the nature of life.
		
00:11:55 --> 00:11:57
			There is no certainty in life.
		
00:11:57 --> 00:12:00
			And the sooner you get used to ambiguity,
		
00:12:00 --> 00:12:03
			the sooner you get used to dealing with
		
00:12:03 --> 00:12:07
			uncertainty, the sooner you get used to not
		
00:12:07 --> 00:12:11
			allowing uncertainty to phase you or to freeze
		
00:12:11 --> 00:12:13
			you, the happier you will be.
		
00:12:15 --> 00:12:18
			So, and that's what excitement is about.
		
00:12:18 --> 00:12:22
			Excitement is uncertainty with…
		
00:12:22 --> 00:12:26
			about which you have a happy thought, something
		
00:12:26 --> 00:12:28
			that you hope will end well.
		
00:12:28 --> 00:12:32
			And you try to assure that ending well
		
00:12:32 --> 00:12:33
			by doing your homework.
		
00:12:34 --> 00:12:37
			So, it doesn't matter about the uncertainty, then
		
00:12:37 --> 00:12:40
			you take a decision of the career that
		
00:12:40 --> 00:12:40
			you want to do.
		
00:12:41 --> 00:12:47
			Final point, the question of consistency, which is
		
00:12:47 --> 00:12:50
			that once you have decided on the career,
		
00:12:51 --> 00:12:53
			now go ahead, do what you need to
		
00:12:53 --> 00:12:53
			do.
		
00:12:54 --> 00:12:59
			Your, you know, thoughts and ideas and do
		
00:12:59 --> 00:13:00
			what you need to do with regard to
		
00:13:00 --> 00:13:05
			applying to colleges, universities, depending on what it
		
00:13:05 --> 00:13:11
			is, apprenticeship for skills, whatever it was, and
		
00:13:11 --> 00:13:14
			get on with it and do your absolute
		
00:13:14 --> 00:13:15
			best.
		
00:13:15 --> 00:13:19
			Remember, when you are studying and preparing for
		
00:13:19 --> 00:13:23
			a career, you are in a lifetime project.
		
00:13:24 --> 00:13:26
			It's not about that one exam.
		
00:13:26 --> 00:13:28
			It is a result of that exam.
		
00:13:28 --> 00:13:30
			That result of that exam, if it is
		
00:13:30 --> 00:13:32
			good, it will open doors for you, which
		
00:13:32 --> 00:13:34
			will be open for the rest of your
		
00:13:34 --> 00:13:34
			life.
		
00:13:35 --> 00:13:37
			And if the result of that exam is
		
00:13:37 --> 00:13:40
			bad, and you don't need to fail in
		
00:13:40 --> 00:13:43
			the exam, if you don't have a decent
		
00:13:43 --> 00:13:46
			GPA, then it means that more than likely,
		
00:13:47 --> 00:13:51
			some very important doors in your life will
		
00:13:51 --> 00:13:53
			be shut, usually forever.
		
00:13:54 --> 00:14:03
			There's nothing more pointless and hopeless than to
		
00:14:03 --> 00:14:06
			have to say, if only I had done
		
00:14:06 --> 00:14:07
			this, if only I had done that.
		
00:14:09 --> 00:14:12
			Today we live in a world where we
		
00:14:12 --> 00:14:20
			have been fooled and beguiled into believing that
		
00:14:20 --> 00:14:23
			our feelings are the only thing which matter.
		
00:14:24 --> 00:14:25
			Nothing else matters.
		
00:14:27 --> 00:14:32
			My feelings matter, and my feelings supersede everything
		
00:14:32 --> 00:14:32
			in the world.
		
00:14:33 --> 00:14:36
			My feelings supersede everyone else's feelings.
		
00:14:36 --> 00:14:39
			My feelings supersede social norms.
		
00:14:40 --> 00:14:43
			My feelings supersede ethics and morals.
		
00:14:43 --> 00:14:45
			My feelings supersede everything.
		
00:14:46 --> 00:14:50
			This is the complete and total falsehood.
		
00:14:51 --> 00:14:54
			This is the big lie, which somebody called
		
00:14:54 --> 00:14:58
			the tyranny of feelings.
		
00:14:59 --> 00:15:03
			We have allowed our feelings to tyrannize us.
		
00:15:04 --> 00:15:06
			You are not your feeling.
		
00:15:07 --> 00:15:08
			You feel the feeling.
		
00:15:09 --> 00:15:10
			You own the feeling.
		
00:15:12 --> 00:15:16
			In my book I have said that my
		
00:15:16 --> 00:15:19
			feelings are my feelings because they are my
		
00:15:19 --> 00:15:19
			feelings.
		
00:15:19 --> 00:15:21
			It's like saying my dog.
		
00:15:21 --> 00:15:23
			It's my dog because I own the dog.
		
00:15:24 --> 00:15:25
			I am not the dog.
		
00:15:27 --> 00:15:28
			So stop being the dog.
		
00:15:29 --> 00:15:29
			You own the dog.
		
00:15:29 --> 00:15:30
			Now what's the benefit of that?
		
00:15:31 --> 00:15:38
			The benefit of understanding the true position of
		
00:15:38 --> 00:15:41
			your feelings is that you put them in
		
00:15:41 --> 00:15:41
			their place.
		
00:15:42 --> 00:15:43
			What is the place of your feelings?
		
00:15:44 --> 00:15:47
			The place of your my feelings is as
		
00:15:47 --> 00:15:50
			somethings that are in my control.
		
00:15:51 --> 00:15:53
			I choose to feel this way or that.
		
00:15:54 --> 00:15:55
			Watch your conversation.
		
00:15:56 --> 00:16:00
			Anytime you are saying things like, he made
		
00:16:00 --> 00:16:00
			me angry.
		
00:16:02 --> 00:16:03
			She broke my heart.
		
00:16:04 --> 00:16:09
			He, you know, is responsible for I'm feeling
		
00:16:09 --> 00:16:11
			bad and he's responsible.
		
00:16:12 --> 00:16:16
			This external affirmation, the need for external affirmation,
		
00:16:18 --> 00:16:23
			affiliation needs, the need for somebody else to
		
00:16:23 --> 00:16:28
			affirm that I am a good human being,
		
00:16:28 --> 00:16:29
			that I am successful.
		
00:16:30 --> 00:16:31
			Think about that.
		
00:16:31 --> 00:16:34
			You know, there are people in the world,
		
00:16:34 --> 00:16:41
			and I'm really talking to myself, who have
		
00:16:41 --> 00:16:45
			enormously successful careers.
		
00:16:46 --> 00:16:48
			You know, I mean, they're absolutely tops.
		
00:16:49 --> 00:16:49
			Number one.
		
00:16:51 --> 00:16:54
			And they have these amazing careers.
		
00:16:55 --> 00:17:00
			And yet, they get very unhappy if they
		
00:17:00 --> 00:17:03
			don't get somebody or the other to affirm
		
00:17:03 --> 00:17:04
			that for them.
		
00:17:04 --> 00:17:06
			They don't have somebody praising them and saying,
		
00:17:06 --> 00:17:08
			oh, wow, you are the best.
		
00:17:08 --> 00:17:09
			They get very upset.
		
00:17:10 --> 00:17:11
			Now think about that.
		
00:17:12 --> 00:17:13
			The reason I took this picture of these
		
00:17:13 --> 00:17:17
			beautiful, beautiful hibiscus is this.
		
00:17:17 --> 00:17:20
			Here's this flower being the best it can
		
00:17:21 --> 00:17:21
			be.
		
00:17:21 --> 00:17:24
			And it doesn't give a damn what I
		
00:17:24 --> 00:17:24
			think.
		
00:17:25 --> 00:17:26
			It's not doing it for me.
		
00:17:27 --> 00:17:28
			So I'm appreciating the flower.
		
00:17:29 --> 00:17:32
			By appreciating the flower, I'm showing that I
		
00:17:32 --> 00:17:36
			have a good aesthetic sense that I have
		
00:17:36 --> 00:17:39
			the sense to appreciate something which is beautiful.
		
00:17:40 --> 00:17:44
			So by appreciating the flower, I'm really affirming
		
00:17:44 --> 00:17:48
			my, within quotes, good sense.
		
00:17:48 --> 00:17:51
			The flower doesn't give anything.
		
00:17:52 --> 00:17:54
			The flower doesn't care whether I appreciate it
		
00:17:54 --> 00:17:54
			or not.
		
00:17:54 --> 00:17:56
			The flower is being itself.
		
00:17:57 --> 00:17:59
			And that is the mindset to cultivate.
		
00:18:00 --> 00:18:03
			To say, I will be the best that
		
00:18:03 --> 00:18:04
			I can be.
		
00:18:05 --> 00:18:07
			And I'm being that because of who I
		
00:18:07 --> 00:18:08
			am.
		
00:18:09 --> 00:18:11
			Not because of what anybody else might think.
		
00:18:12 --> 00:18:14
			Not because I'm not playing to any gallery.
		
00:18:15 --> 00:18:17
			I'm not doing it because somebody else is
		
00:18:17 --> 00:18:17
			watching.
		
00:18:18 --> 00:18:21
			I'm not, you know, stopping midway to listen
		
00:18:21 --> 00:18:22
			for the applause.
		
00:18:23 --> 00:18:23
			Who is clapping?
		
00:18:24 --> 00:18:24
			No.
		
00:18:24 --> 00:18:26
			I am going to be the best that
		
00:18:26 --> 00:18:27
			I'm going to be.
		
00:18:28 --> 00:18:32
			So it's very, very important to keep this
		
00:18:32 --> 00:18:33
			thing in mind.
		
00:18:33 --> 00:18:36
			Work to do the best.
		
00:18:37 --> 00:18:40
			Because as far as you are concerned, there
		
00:18:40 --> 00:18:41
			is no other way.
		
00:18:43 --> 00:18:45
			Because in the end, it's about you.
		
00:18:46 --> 00:18:47
			It's not about them.
		
00:18:48 --> 00:18:49
			It's not about somebody else.
		
00:18:49 --> 00:18:50
			It's about you.
		
00:18:51 --> 00:18:52
			So we do the best we can do,
		
00:18:52 --> 00:18:54
			because it's about me.
		
00:18:56 --> 00:18:58
			I wish you all the very best.
		
00:19:00 --> 00:19:03
			Follow this advice and inshallah you will, you
		
00:19:03 --> 00:19:04
			will be the best.
		
00:19:05 --> 00:19:11
			And questions, comments, post them, ask them, and
		
00:19:11 --> 00:19:11
			I'll do my best to answer.