Mirza Yawar Baig – Friends
AI: Summary ©
The speaker discusses the importance of friends in life and how they are the ones who are closest to one. They stress the importance of monitoring conversations and seeking out information to determine the best way to spend one's time. The speaker also touches on the importance of avoiding empty promises and finding good friends in a blind woman who died after her date was removed from her date store. They emphasize the need for people to be aware of their friendships and find opportunities to make friendships successful.
AI: Summary ©
My brothers and sisters, I want to talk
to you today about
an extremely important aspect of our lives which
is our friends.
Now today the interesting thing is that thanks
to
social media, even the word friends have become.
You have Facebook friend, then you have this
friend, that friend, and many of the there's
a joke, which is that this guy,
he dies.
And,
in his funeral, there are 3 people.
So his mother says, but on Facebook, he
had 15,000 friends.
And his funeral is 3 people.
The reason I'm saying friends is because Allah
mentioned friends
in the Quran.
Friends are so important that Allah
himself mentioned friends in the Quran. Allah and
in in terms of friends, Allah used the
word
Now in the Arabic language as you know
there are many words for friends. There is
Zamil and there is and there's, you know,
many things. And but Khalil
is
a friend who is so close
that,
literally there are no secrets between these two.
And they're very, very, very close. They they
are they protect each other. They
know each other's secrets.
That Allah,
is like Ibrahim
gave this this title
And Rasoolullah sallam said that Abu Bakr would
have been my khalil or the but
Allah has taken me for a khalil.
Right, so this is the level of friendship.
Now Allah says
in the Quran
al akhilah which is the plural of khalil.
Now the point is
look at the wording of this. First of
all, Allah is talking about.
He's saying these are the people
who in the life of the world were
not simply friends.
They were the closest, the dearest.
Right?
They literally see each other every day, and,
you know, you can't live without the person,
and you miss that person if you don't
see them and so on and so on.
Those people
on the day of judgment,
they will not simply ignore each other. They
will not simply refuse to recognize each other.
They will not simply say somebody says salaam
alikum. They will not say I I will
not say. No.
They are enemies to each other.
Okay.
Enemy. Now what's an enemy?
An enemy is someone who wants to harm
you. Right? I mean this is this is
like
extreme. This is not somebody okay. I mean,
I I knew you now. I don't know
who you are. No. No. No. No. No.
This I want you to die. I want
you to be destroyed. I want you something
bad to happen to you. They will be
enemies.
People who are that close
will be enemies to each other on the
day of judgment.
Except the people of Taqwa.
Now what does it tell us? It tells
us that one of the most important things
to do in this life
is to look at our friends list.
Who are my friends?
Rasool said you are on the faith of
your friends. You are on the iman of
your friends.
You will be like your friends. You know,
people say you are the you are the
you are the you are the total of
the 5 people closest to you.
So do your own thing. Who are the
5 people you see on a daily basis?
Who are the 5 people? Just out of
the like you're sleeping, somebody wakes you up.
Name 5 people who will love the most.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Who are those
5?
Right?
You are the sum of those 5 people.
Now imagine if those 5 people are people
who are not the best people.
Now who are the best people? Alhamdulillah. This
is a
the thing that, you know, that that strikes
me and over and over and over and
for,
Alhamdulillah, you know, many, many years now. Is
how complete this deen is?
Allah has completed.
There is nothing in this deen which is
left vacant for someone to come and say,
well, this is my piece. I'm going to
stick it here. No. Everything is completed. You
you ask a question, the answer is there.
So you say, okay. These friends are so
important.
What should my friend be like? Who should
I take as my friend? Rasulullah mentioned this.
Rasulullah
said a friend
must be somebody
who
when you see him, you remember Allah. That
means the friend reminds you of Allah Subhanahu
Wa Ta'ala.
The friend must be somebody who reminds you
of your meeting with Allah.
The friend must be somebody who you learn
something from, something beneficial.
Right? So when we look at our friends,
we must
look at them in this context. This person
I'm meeting on a daily basis,
does he remind me of Allah or does
he take me to Hainulah? Does it I
mean in the worst case, of course, he
takes me to it takes me to sinning.
But even if it does not take me
to sinning, what is my conversation?
Monitoring conversation is a very good way of,
of assessing friendship. When you're talking to somebody,
what I would I'm not saying
necessarily that you have to recite Quran to
each other all the time, but I'm saying
what is the general conversation? Are you talking
money and this and that and you're chasing
this and chasing that or whatnot or is
the conversation at least some part of the
conversation to say,
where is my life taking me? What is
the direction I should go?
What is the best way of spending my
time?
Right? What is the the I I'm I'm
engaged in certain some activities. What is the
benefit of this activity?
What is this conversation?
Are you talking about people? This is
may Allah protect us. I mean, for for
a lot of us, the is social life.
Right?
Our social life is social conversation. It's about
people. This one, that one, that one. If
it's not individual, then it's it's, it's politics.
Right?
This is what so and so should this
king should do that and that Biden should
do this and this one.
What is the good of that? They don't
listen to you. You don't know them. What's
the point? You're wasting your time talking about
things you have no control over. Nothing. So
what's the what's the point of that whole
conversation? The
best is it's a waste of time. That's
the best.
And the worst is that it is it
means your deeds are going to somebody else.
So monitor conversations.
Monitor silences. Some of my best and closest
friends,
I don't speak at all. They don't speak
at all.
But it's wonderful you are in their company.
You have to say something. You say something
useful. That person will say something which is
you you enjoy that. You enjoy something together.
We don't talk.
Companionship is in silence. You
don't have to chatter all the time. You're
not chickens. Right? You're human beings.
There's no need to chatter all the time.
There's
companionship in silence.
There are some friends of mine, almost
check which what book are you reading now?
What book are you working on now? Which
means which book are you writing now? Which
book are you working on? Standard question. If
I if I meet the guy, I must
have an answer. I know this person is
gonna ask me, what book are you reading
now? So either I tell him a lie
or
I should be reading some book, some useful
book.
Alhamdulillah, I mean, I Those are the kind
of friends who are good because they they
stretch you. Right?
So you you you If you you know,
you're gonna meet the person. He's gonna ask
me these questions.
What's my reading list?
It's very, very important.
Some of the closest friends, let me end
with that, which is you take so say
the Abu Bakr Siddiq Adal Anhu and say
the Omar of the Fata.
Right?
2 of the closest and dearest friends.
Also 2 of the greatest rivals.
Actually I don't think
was in that rivalry.
What's his rivalry? I must try to do
more than Abubakar Abidilam.
Something better than him.
It's a beautiful rival. You know you are
you are your rivalry is in.
What can I do better than Abu Bakr?
And there are so many of these
of the different kinds of stories
of how they did this rivalry.
Like when
Nabi was collecting funds for tabuk. He says
Rama comes and he says half of my
wealth I have brought.
And
comes with 1 small bag.
And says
what is this? See, Rasulullah, this is all
I have.
So what did you leave for your family?
He said, Allah for
my family.
I mean, there's more to this story, but
we leave it at this point.
The story of Sahid
al Khattab
going to that when after Saiedid Nawar passed
away,
they told him they told Saiedid Nawar who
was the Khalifa
that Sahid Nawar who used to go to
this place, this this, outside of Madina. There
was this hut camp
and they said everyday he would go there.
He would spend some time. He would come
back.
And what did he do? We don't know
what he did.
He goes there and he finds there is
this old woman who's blind.
She's almost bedridden
and she's in this tent. She has a
couple of goats and so Sareen Nava realizes
that, you know, she has he has to
clean and whatnot. So he cleaned up the
thing and so on, takes care of the
animals,
cooks her food,
and then
he leaves it there.
And there are various aspects. So they said
somebody said he gave her a date to
eat and she said, you are not the
person who comes before.
You are a new person.
She said, why did you ask? How do
you know that? He said, because he used
to remove
the date store, the seed from the date
before giving it to him.
In another version, they said he cooked the
food and he left it there. She said,
you are not the person. Why? Because he
used to feed me.
He knows I'm blind.
So what happened to him?
He said he passed away. So she said.
Sir, do you know who he was?
He said, no.
He never told me.
Sir, the number says he was the Khalifa
He was the Khalifa. He was the ruler.
And Sahid Nama sits down and holds his
head.
And he says, yeah, Babakar.
You have made it very difficult for us.
And the final story and think about this.
In
Saeedullah, Saeedullah is walking.
And he overhears some people sitting and talking.
And these those people, they look at Saeedullah
and they say there has never been a
ruler like this.
Is the best ruler and he's better than
Abu Bakr.
Somebody
says this.
Say that now imagine if if if you
are in that place, right, what would you
feel?
Somebody who passed away before you and somebody
is praising you and saying, you are the
best, you know, the greatest one.
Says, turns around and he comes back and
he says, what did you say?
They said, yeah. We said this because, you
know,
he says, says,
Omar's entire life and every deed
and every deed and and the life of
the whole family of Omar
is not equal to one day in the
life of Abubakar.
So don't say this.
All my life and all my deeds and
all the deeds of my family, everybody together
is not equal to even one day in
the life of Abu Bakr.
This is the meaning of friendship.
This is the meaning of friendship. I realize
we don't
have friends like Abu Bakr, Hanuman, or Al
Anwah but
there are good people in this world and
life.
And I remind myself when you let us
be with such people.
Has given us such company in this
place itself. Allah bless all of you.
Let us find such people. Be with such
people. Spend time with such people.
Because that's where we learn and that is
where we make dua for each other and
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala accept these dua's.
You ask Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala to bless
us with good friends who will be a
good influence for us, who will guide us
to the right path and keep us on
the right path and who will correct us
when we go wrong because this is another
part of friendship.
Said a friend is like a mirror. You
look at your face in the mirror, you
correct your beard and you correct your your
hat and whatever and, you know, you look
good because that's the friend. He's giving you
this feedback.
So
this is a huge blessing. We ask Allah
to guide us, give us friends like that,
who support us, who protect us, who will
take care of us, who
correct us when we need correction, who will
support us, who will who will, you know,
guide us and who will
will praise us when we need that encouragement,
who will encourage us, and who will most
importantly will make dua for us before Allah
because this is the last point he said
if you make a dua for your friend
Allah
appoints an angel to make the same dua
for you and he said the dua of
the angel is better than your dua. Angel
is better than your dua. So we ask
Allah to give us friends who would make
dua for us. I request all of you
to make dua for me.
And
And we ask Allah to accept our dua
and to forgive us and to
to forgive our shortcomings and to,
be pleased with us and never to be
displeased.