Mikaeel Smith – Power of Dua & Positive Thinking
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Hey, what's up Nouman Raja, welcome everybody to the Safina
society Podcast. Today we got one of our good old friends. Mikayla
Hamid Smith. He's not old. He's very young. But hamdullah we have
a longtime friendship. He's a very young man. He's at a Buffalo, New
York, but he was swallowed up in the in the vacuum. For Muslims,
that is Texas. Like,
every two years, every two weeks, something we know, somebody we
know, is Lord to the I guess it's the taxes or something or the land
cheaper or something. And they all go out down to Texas, but
could hamdulillah he's with us, though, and we're probably going
to bring him back to the east from Buffalo, New York. Gonna bring it
back eventually, right? Because nobody stays there forever. They
stay there to save up some and then they got to come back to real
life and real civilization. So inshallah We'll bring him back.
And we're going to talk today about the prophets of Allah when
he was typically his habit of listening. Now I want to just say
one observation, that's an amazing observation to think about. Allah
subhanaw taala says, Oh, the laminator I'm going to Jim
Sundaram and that by the semi Allah Who cola Lottie to judge
DeLuca fee, zodia, which is Chucky, Lola, just to show you the
rank of the prophets I sent him, Allah reveals the surah in which
he says, Allah has heard the one who, who complains to you about
her husband, or not, or discusses with you, her husband, and
complains to Allah.
Allah in this area has linked going to the prophet is going to
Allah subhanaw taala. In the respect of you, you only go to the
person of Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, because he's
Rasulullah. Right. And this is almost like jet Okafor stuff where
jet Oka stuff for Allah was stuff for llama Rasool La Jolla to Ebola
Haven. All right, so for those who want to understand the rank of the
Prophet peace be upon anytime that a Muslim directs attention to the
Prophet peace be upon him, Allah of use it as that he is coming to
me. Why because he is the human Messenger of Allah, Allah. And we
would not have otherwise gone to the messenger, except if it was
for the sake of Allah. Right. And that's very much like, anytime
that someone complains to an imam. And I remember some while back, a
young man came stopped me said I need to talk. We sat for 40
minutes talking. And he was in tears because he was addicted to
something. And he's talking to me, because that's just like the
person that he associates that who could help me in my struggle,
right, who could help me my struggle between me and Allah, his
struggles between him and Allah, but he's just going to the person
that in his mind symbolizes. So Allah is telling us that whoever
goes to the messenger sites, wherever devotees, his time to the
Prophet, whoever devotes his decurrent so the words to the
Prophet peace be upon any of that is in fact,
traveling to Allah. So I just wanted to open with that because
it's an area that many people recite off and don't realize that
Allah has linked the fact that she went to the Prophet. And he says,
she's complaining to me, because anyone who devotes any time to the
messenger, in fact, he's devoting that time and that energy to Allah
Himself.
That's the only reason you would go there. Just like someone who's
going to Mecca. You can say, I'm going to Allah. Right. In other
words, so that's just an opening statement. And now, our our guests
if you don't know who should Mikhail Hamid Smith is converted
to Islam when he was just a young youth in
it's one of my favorite personal expressions, young youth. It's
very Wu Tang.
I don't know about what what is the reference to it's
it's one of the songs. Okay.
So
he's from Buffalo, he becomes awesome, and very young age. And
then he ends up studying data loom in Buffalo. Yeah.
Not many converts are told, okay, first thing you say the shot the
second thing you enroll into sixth year and of course,
be the Koran first man. First year, three years of that man,
three years
hamdulillah and then he graduated, so seven years later, and then he
then he discovered Oh, you mean doing that seven year and of
course was optional. Beautiful.
So in any event, he ends up becoming Mashallah. It's a love
fast track. And he then was still worked as an imam in Baltimore.
Yeah. And then he got another teaching position in Texas where
he works in the Columbia Institute. And he wrote a book
called The prophetic with the heart in mind, with the heart in
mind, but it's the emotional intelligence of the Prophet, the
moral and emotional, the moral, good moral and emotional
intelligence of prophets. I send them and he's coming out with a
second book, a follow up on that. And this podcast is going to talk
about that follow up. So I'm done talking. Let's turn it over to
you. Tell us about your book. Bismillah R Rahman, r Rahim, Al
hamdu lillah wa Salatu was Salam ala Rasulillah,
JSOC and long haired man, you know, I'm so you know, honored to
be with you guys, man. Just as a fan of the podcast, you know, I
mean, just someone who always benefits. You know, I feel like,
you know, just my friends that I would ride back to home ride home
with, you know, on the bus and kick it with, you know, I think a
lot of American Muslims around the country. They feel like they know,
y'all, you know, I mean, it's like these my boys, you know, and I
just want to say, just talk them a little higher, because you're,
you're providing a service, you're providing community, for those who
don't have community, right. And it's grounded community to its
prophetically grounded, you know, I mean, so it's not some like, you
know, crazy community, it's grounded in prophetic ideals. And
so, it's great to be, you know, here with you guys, this evening.
Hamdulillah.
And, yeah, we're gonna be talking this evening about the book that
I'm working on right now, which is kind of like the follow up to the
emotional intelligence book. And, you know, we never got a chance to
kind of unpack the whole concept behind emotional intelligence. But
I just kind of briefly want to just put out there some aspects of
emotional intelligence within the prophetic concept of ocular
intellect. So the basic premise of the first book is that there's the
the messenger has a message, but the messenger was also given the
understanding of human beings in order to pass on that message to
other human beings. And so I think one of the impetus behind writing
this book was I noticed that Dawa had become very robotic, very,
like, I would say, like, programmer language type stuff,
like, this is it this the Huff brooch, take it like, you don't
get it, like, like, like, That's it, like, I'm like, Jota, Jota,
Jota, you're dealing with rational, you're dealing with not
just rational human beings, but emotional human beings. And so
this led to me going deeper into this emotional intelligence, and
eventually, hamdulillah like the book came together. And the idea
is that the prophets of Allah, who it was selling them was divinely
endowed with deep understanding of human beings on an emotional
level, in order to facilitate and make it easy for him to unlock the
hearts and pass that message on. Now, there are obviously still
going to be people who choose like, Nah, I don't want it. But
for the most part from our side, the the Hoja, as we say, is time,
right. So that means basically, like the proof of accountability
has been established. And so my premise is that if the prophets I
send them had not been given that high caliber of emotional
intelligence, then it's fathomable or conceivable to say that people
could come on human land, but I didn't get the message. Right?
Because giving that message requires more than just dropping
it at the doorstep. You know, it's it's a, you know, it's a certified
package, you know, I mean, is the joint you got to sign for it. I
mean, it's not the one that just gets dropped at the door. And so I
began to like, you know, research go deeper into this emotional
intelligence. And, and side by side, as I've my my knowledge,
whatever little knowledge of the shitty I have. I'm like, Yo, look,
this is beautiful. This, this is the prophet already. And so that
first book was basically just presenting to the Muslim audience,
that this is a new way for you to appreciate the brilliance of
Muhammad sai Senna. That's it. This is a new way for you to
appreciate the brilliance of Muhammad sighs Selim. I think, I'm
sure everyone in this group can kind of resonate, you know, I was
the type and I'm the type you walk through Barnes and Noble, you pick
up a nice book or whatever, and borders and then you have to
Islamophobia that you know, I mean, you got to make it Muslim.
You know, go ahead. Yeah, shake. So one of the things I was looking
at how to classify this knowledge is a
How to deal with people is an observable, it's observable
knowledge. It's experiential knowledge, right? And so that's
also one of the things that the that Allah inspired his messenger
with, because it's needed as you said, to transmit the message and,
and to be likable is a condition to be listened to.
And says, Without quantification of ideological being a fundament
how thick, you are harsh and hard hearted, they would have left. So
it's not just about
the proofs, such as, okay, I split the moon, I bring you this, you
couldn't bring me the Quran. These are the rational proofs or the the
miraculous proofs of prophethood. But it's not just that it's the
Prophet was very likable. Yeah, yep. Can I ask you that? Oh, go
ahead. Go ahead. God, it's among the conditions the the, the truth
of being a prophet is attractiveness physically,
freedom from from, from discussing diseases, right. eloquence and
speech. These are these are required. These are among the
attributes that are necessary for prophets. Yeah. So Allah would not
make that the case. If it wasn't important. If it was just the
message is good enough for you? A subpanel. That's beautiful.
That's, you know, you mentioned Dr. Shadi about the experience. So
Imam Suha de you, okay, Imam so how what to do, he has this
brilliant quote,
where he basically um, say really quick, he basically says, Whoever
studies the prophesy synonyms life, and how he interacted with
the atoms, and he explains how the atoms were at that time. We're
talking really hood people, I mean, all due respect, like, and I
hope that you know, our listeners don't misconstrue what I'm trying
to say, but like, these were rough people, man. These were rough.
These were rough cats man like they they their hearts were hard.
Hearts were heart. And in order to make them an empathetic people, in
order to make them messengers of the messenger, there had to be a
complete revolution. Now Imams know how to do says if you just
study his management of the audit, this is exactly what he says.
We're more armella to him our home, he's like, You will come to
the conclusion that he's the most intelligent of God's creation.
Now, you said something deep. You said, this is a knowledge that's
learned through experience. So I grew up in Buffalo, New York,
which is not you know, it's not the Bronx, but it's still hood.
You know, I mean, it's not New York. It's not jersey. My bad.
It's not north. It's not North Jersey.
Is not North Jersey, you know, but it ain't you know, it ain't you
know, South Jersey either. You know, I mean?
Yeah, I mean, it's somewhere in the middle. So, I learned street
smarts, I learned how to walk past a drug house, I learned how to
walk paths up, you know, someone trying to, you know, just you poke
at you. I learned that through experience, you know, I mean, but
here's the deal. Where did the prophesy seldom get private, prior
prior experience? He didn't have one on one management class. Let's
learn this before you get your own Ma. Now, and he didn't ever learn
from mistakes? Definitely. Yeah. Like, if it's something it's about
experience. Then you could say like, whenever there's someone
who's really successful, say, Oh, he's an overnight sensation. And
then someone says, No, he's been at it for like 10 years, making so
many mistakes. And you know, the lower levels of things like an
error, what's at trial and error? Yeah, trial and error. Like the
Beatles, they worked in some grungy bar for four years. No one
ever heard of him, but they got good there because they learned
that right. So but with the messenger, his life is an open
book.
There's no room for error once those 23 years begin.
And that's what I said. Now, boubakeur said I went to Persia, I
traveled to the Byzantines, and I've seen the most sophisticated
people. I know that we don't have that here in Arabia. So how did
you learn this? Exactly? Right. That's one of his biggest proofs
of profit. Yeah, amazing. Amazing. So so that was kind of it. You
know, I there's a lot behind that. There's a lot to discuss. Because,
you know, there's body language, there's nonverbal communication.
Well, my daughter said nominator Azulon, Illa, Billy Sani, only he,
I think we could really discuss what does it mean Billy sign he
called me, right? That that that means that emotional level of
understanding because the sun, you can know Arabic and not understand
any jokes or poetry in Arabic. You don't know that. Lisa? Right.
Because emotion is the deeper level of language like so. So, so
So there's so much back behind there. And one more thing, I think
when we say there is no room for mistakes, I think some of our
listeners may think about Abba Wella. And I think what we find is
there were small lapses in the emotional intelligence that were
fixed, and, and and corrected as they were
other mistakes, there were other mistakes like the prisoners of
budget, right? So whatever was not a major aid, it was an HD hottie
mistake. Then there was room for the for the Prophet to make a
mistake there and be corrected. Right. So, you know, just I know
we use a lot of terms sometimes listeners they're like What do you
mean opposite what the Wallah I'm referring to the time when the
prophesy Salam was giving Dawa to some of the, you know, had leaders
of the Quran and then a poor blind man came
talking to the prophesy, Salam and he kind of, you know, focused on
those he was trying to give Dawa to, um, you know, that may be an
example of a lapse someone in the Quran is calling that out in a in
a way. I'm just trying to say it with as much respect as possible,
right? Because nowadays, people take it lightly to not give the
Prophet size and the respect necessary but Well, one of the
ways to that that's looked at is that the Prophet peace be upon him
was choosing and he wanted to do the harder job,
which is to convince people who are rejecting you.
To pay attention to the sahabi Abdullah bin Omar Maktoum tune was
the easier job, right? He wanted to do the harder job, Allahu
Akbar, Allah azza wa jal says Allah says La la cabeza en necec.
You are
working so hard, you're exhausting yourself and upsetting yourself.
Right? That's actually
can be interpreted as being for the profit. In other words, saying
you are doing so much. Leave this difficult one. All right. He's
difficult. Whoever it was Abuja had that he was able to
remember who it was he was sitting with. From the Quraysh. Yeah.
Leave him. All right, and turn yourself to the one who already
believes in you.
So that's actually one way to view the opposite way. That's a
beautiful actually.
And anything that we ever see in the life of the prophet sallallahu
alayhi wa sallam, whether it's still one time when he he woke up
close to the end of the time of so
all of this is all teachable. Yeah, and every single incident
that Allah created in his lifestyle, Allahu alayhi wa sallam
was so that we would have the knowledge of what's better, or how
to deal with whatever circumstance comes up. So like an Abba toilet,
right? The there's lessons there. There's tremendous lessons,
there's the focus. There's also the fact that the believer no
matter how, apparently dunya, we seems lowly, has a higher rank
than even the highest ranked person of disbelief. That's right.
And so there's lessons throughout all of it. And all of it is good
for us, in that we get from his life, and now that he's in the
versa as well. And do you ever noticed that?
When it's a regular day in the masjid, everyone's fine. But as
soon as there's some kind of local person, or maybe someone's
interested in Islam, they're not Muslim. They come in all the vibes
change, right? Usually, against those types of people come to the
masjid who are really devoted, but they're scrub, like, every when
the politician comes to ask you for a vote, it takes the men bar,
and then they tried to hide away the miskeen in the community.
I always think about, that's the most appropriate analogy. Yeah.
Which taught us from eternity. Okay. Yes, it may be very, or not,
from eternity, from the time of the Prophet peace be upon him, but
in his eternal speech, is that, yeah, it may be very beneficial if
this person has a good view of Islam and becomes Muslim, right?
Or even just has a good rapport with the Muslims, but not at the
costs of pushing aside. So if you want to accept Islam, this is the
idea. If you like us, and you want to be part of it, you will accept
all of us, including our poor, who don't, they don't know how they
don't have the wealth to dress up, they don't even know how to dress
up. Right? You have to accept them. They're part of the team,
right? And they're part of the family, and we're not hiding them
away, so that you can be happy, right? That's essentially one of
our messages. That's, I mean, that's a lesson that you can
pretty much directly apply to today, right and seeking it in
people who seek acceptance from those who are never going to
accept them at the expense of you know, tending to the community
that does except you, right, a lot of you see you see that a lot
today and it's like you can take that lesson and pretty much
wholesale apply it today. If you can get things through that lens
and the other beautiful
Whatever it is, it also lets us know that this is human nature
though. Yeah, like the inclination is to do that is to try to reel in
the big fish who's giving you a hard time Yeah. And focus on that
and this is it's so it's such a natural human inclination so we
don't have to chastise each other over it just remind each other
gently about it. Yeah, yeah although I will say that there's
one exception and in which when the is not too often too big of
attention but when when we get people from outside domestic
coming in, man I really wish there was an an eloquent solution an
elegant solution to the shoe cubicles man. I have the solution.
What is it and remember when we talked to Sharif and we we spent
like we spent like an hour of the podcast that we cut out discussing
solutions for shoe shoe companies because I don't get what the
problem is though. So you should even New York he wanted to make
this great view big beautiful museum, right? So I said well,
there's going to be masala there. What are you gonna do about
tissues? The point being is that you walk into a masjid the
immediate Association visit visually, and olfactory really?
Your nose and your eyes immediately. It shoes.
The solution? We all know the solution very well, because I
spent all my youth in rinks. Where do they put the shoes? Why don't
you see shoes in hockey rinks? We have an attendant ocarina there
all the way in the back. Right? And you you put your shoes there
in the back and it's in a closed space. In New York City. If you go
to Rockefeller Center, one of those skating rinks in New York
City, where are the shoes, there's like a building a little building
in the back, or a bowling alley, or building up behind the rink.
It's closed off. It's ventilated. It's the shoe area. Right? You
have to have an attendant though, you do need to have an attendant
so well. I guess you do need to have an attendant, right? No,
maybe not. I guess people could walk all around the corner. Do it
and then come back out. Exactly. You walk there. So when you enter
the master, you should have a masala somewhere. You should walk.
Shoes should be tucked away somewhere in a separate room
completely men's room and women's room. Right. And that should an
entrance and an exit. Yes, exactly. And then those reverse
after the Scylla. Exactly. That's it. They got a few spots like that
down here in Dallas. Y'all should come through. Yeah, I mean, you
guys have room for everything, right? Everything is bigger in
Texas.
Space up in the Northeast.
Every inch of every inch of real estate is valuable here. Well, you
know, you know how I knew they had space. Here's when I realized they
had space in Texas government driving down the highway and miss
your exit, right? Or you get off on an exit and you try to go back
the other way. Right. So you go on southbound, right? And you need to
you need to go northbound. So what do we do up north northeast, we
get off the exit, go to the stoplight, turn left, then turn
left again and get back on down here. They got one lane just for
that you turn? No, no light, no nothing. I'm like, that's how I
knew I was like y'all got extra space, you're just playing with
space.
Now shift, okay, I want to bring up a point for you here. Maybe you
can expand on this. I actually believe that people gravitate to
whether it's political leaders, or friends, or religious leaders,
spiritual leaders, not by their arguments, but by like emotional
vibrations, or emotional states. So if you're angry,
no matter what you actually believe, if you're an angry
person, for some reason, for something happened in your life,
you're gonna gravitate to an angry religious personality, not the
religious personality that's preaching your message, like your
belief system. But let's say
I'm in let's say I'm an angry. Sad, right?
I'm messed up. Right? Hypothetically, right?
I'm not going to gravitate to a peaceful sad. I'll probably spend
more time listening to another angry speaker. Right? Because I we
match emotionally. Right? And I might say, Yeah, I know, he's, you
know, this that are other beliefs. But he's got a point. Right? And
those guys, yeah, there are people, but they don't even know
what there's, you know, third, living in some other worlds. So
emotional states. It's like matches with like, more so than
rational position. That's actually my observation in life with
people. So I just off the top of my head. I never thought of it
from that perspective. But as you were explaining, there's one thing
that came to my mind from the Prophet size of them's life. This
narration there's multiple narrations from the story of the
conversion of Omar bin Fatah, the Aloha, there's multiple if you
read
And he shot me in other places you'll get a few different
narrations right? But anyways, one of the narrations tells us that
when asked me to help Bob came into the house, right?
When he actually came in and Hamza was like, let him in, I'll kill
him with his own sword. That's my most epic lineman Masha Allah. But
anyway, so Hamza are the lungs, like Letterman, you know, they
grabbed on women club, Bob, and the prophesy sounds like let them
go. And one of these narrations is a rather strong narration, the
prophet comes up to him, and he grabs him by the collar. Yeah. And
an agenda, the agenda, the who he kind of like, shook him up a
little, you know, I mean, and, and he's like, when are you going to
accept Islam? When are you going to accept Islam? And I think
there's a there's something to reflect upon there. Because I
mean, you guys are well read. When did the prophets I seldom ever
grab someone's collar? Yeah. Dawa. And so I get where you're going.
But I think what we can learn also as well, is that what I learned
through the emotional intelligence is that mirroring and knowing
someone's state emotionally, and responding to that state, is the
way you kind of open that receptivity. So what I mean is,
why did he do that to only been cut off? Well, you talk to people
in their language.
Hmm, what's that? And you talk to them in their language and in
their emotional state, too. But also, I mean, the same when I say
language, I think as I was mentioning, I think it was
probably probably prior to the podcast language and emotion are
intrinsically connected. There's no you can't separate the two. The
deeper you understand emotion, the more you actually speak the
language of another person. And what I find actually brilliant and
I'm going to digress for a moment. There's a hadith in Abu dilute
where the prophets I send them is walking through Medina with a
group of Sahaba and a camel calls out like makes this loud noise.
Prophesy Salam goes over to it, he touches it. Now I bring this up in
the book, the prophesy Selim, you seldom find any interaction with
another human being, except that he touched the person. Physical
always physically touch the person, he always physically touch
the person.
There's tons of examples, and I'm not going to digress to that.
That's a huge topic. But he leans into the camel, he listens to the
camel. Now this is crazy. Now, you know if someone's listening to
like, oh, well, how does it how is the prophet of God listening to a
camel? Well, let's just wait for a moment. He comes back. He's like,
Where's the owner of the camel? Somebody's like, someone comes
running really quick. He comes running on a yacht. Rasulullah
it's me. He's like selling me the camel. He's like, you could have
it for free. But it's the only one I got. I mean, he trying to give
it up the profit side sell them understood that and so the
prophets I send them says to him, you know, this camel complained to
me about you not feeding it well, and you working it too hard. It
took a laugh he had hid behind Elmore Gemma fear Allah regarding
these mute these mute animals. Now, well, the reason I brought
that up is is this that language of emotion that's being understood
by our heart that is awake. It's a heart that is awake to emotion and
and this is what I think our community is lacking man we we get
so caught up in the in the the fact that we're forgetting the
emotional aspect of human existence, man, you can't just
drop how can people we are emotional beings, there's so much
to me and so much to you. So when he leans into the camera and
listens to it, that he has a heart that's aware of the pain of
another. And what he's doing is he's passing on the
responsibility. Now Now let's talk about this word respond ability,
right? He's passing on the possibility of being aware of the
pain that others are going through. And he even says those
who can't communicate pain, like I was on, I was on a panel with one
of the dias, mashallah, man, she was amazing. I forget it, forget
her name. She's amazing sister. And we were talking about this
topic. And I was talking about this point right here where the
prophets I send them says, Fear Allah regarding these animals that
can't communicate their pain. And I was saying that as we reach
higher levels of emotional wokeness will reach a level where
the heart understands pain and emotion that isn't even
communicated verbally. And that's the level the prophets eyes son
was that with, with with animals, and that's the level he was at
with trees. And the mortgages. The mortgages of the crying tree is
that the rest of the people were lifted to his level of awareness
for a moment in time Subhan Allah fill me now let me ask you
something, but zoo
So it's heavy. Go ahead. Go ahead. Go ahead. The you think that this
is more of a male problem than a female problems Hamdulillah. So
listen, let me tell you, Dr. Shadi, I'm writing this book man.
Yeah, right in his book back in the day, or it's like three years
ago, and I'm listening to your podcast. And I'm like, yo, this
book is going to become ammunition against every brother in the in
the States.
Joint is gonna be on every Instagram Instagram page. Gonna be
I saw one young comedian brother Muslim brother. Oh, no, I forget
his name. He was like your brother's be buying with the heart
and mind breaking your heart with with the harder mais cracking
jokes. But So honestly, when I wrote this, I was worried about
that. I was deeply worried.
Because my one of the premises that I present is that
he had to create an emotional revolution he was doing things
that were really not normal for men at that time. Let's be frank
man, him hugging and playing with his grandchildren was weird.
Now it's for me and you we get it we're Whoa, we understand that
level of emotion who's gonna deny that? Well, they did. So So is it
a male problem? Some Yes, it is. But does that mean well Allahu
Allah man. I just was very careful and that's why the first part of
the book is the moral intelligence because I wanted to ground the
very fluid nature of emotion with something that's not fluid at all
it's very
concrete you know it's that the moral intelligence
being tested on your theory as we speak
Yeah, Sol sol, sol sol.
Sol so
who is that little creature
what's your
what's your name? madmen.
Mohammad Qasim? I'm a costume Smith. Our costume Smith, masha
Allah, that's a beautiful name.
Can you let daddy finish teaching?
You
what, what taught you when we're done in sha Allah
will wrestled later on. Maybe he's got some good ideas on the topic
as well. Yeah, he wants to wrestle. He wants to wrestle. He's
a boy. He wants to wrestle. Yeah, that's it, bro. That's all.
So that's it. He doesn't want to talk to us.
So okay, go ahead. Go to mommy. Okay, thank you so much. So
much show love. So I'm kind of lost the train of thought there.
But basically, I agree. Dr. Shadi that this could it be? I want it
brothers to see. I want it men to see the prophets I send them from
giving us permission to emote. Um, you know, we all know the Hadith
in the line of TEDMED. Well, Kalba hasn't like the eye cries and the
heart hurts, but we only speak what is that? Right? There's
emotional intelligence. In a nutshell, that hadith literally is
emotional intelligence. Because emotional intelligence can be
broken into five things. By the way, this is actually really good.
The acronym ruler covers all of EQ, ruler, recognize, understand,
label, express, regulate. That's it. Recognize emotion. A lot of us
we struggle like is Wi Fi in a bad mood right now. Like we don't even
I can't even tell. Understand. That's under the etiology of the
expression. You're like, do I understand where this is coming
from? That's understanding labeling. If you can't name it,
you can't tame it. They say like, You got to be able to highlight
what you're feeling or what someone else is feeling in order
to move on to the further steps of regulation. expression in L Aina,
Tedman. The prophets like, Yo, I cry, it's okay. Like, man up, it's
okay to cry. And then the last one was regulate, which is when
there's an expression now, don't let that expression or that
emotion control you but rather you control the emotion. So, yeah. Did
you ever be with somebody and you're in an emotion, and they
labeled that emotion? I think like, you might need to label it
theoretically, but you can never tell them. Oh, you're having this
state right now. Right? Well, I will. A little I would push back a
little.
When when I Aisha tipped over the dish that was sent from Sofia's
house without the hola Juan home to mommy. So for our audience, I
don't want anyone to feel left out. So Omaha Omaha did not mean
you know they were human beings as well. So theater the low and high
was a great cook amazing cook
She sent over food to the prophesy Salam on a day that he was at IHS
house, or the Allahu anha. And she kind of, you know,
she got she got a jealous bout, you know, a fit of, you know,
jealousy. And she, she hit the hand of the servant carrying it on
purpose, and knocked it on the ground. The food's spilled the
glass, the plate broke. And the Prophet SAW Selim, he looked up
and he says, God, it's omec. Yeah. It's like, ah, your mom got a
little jealous right there. You know, she got a little jelly, you
know, they say, you know, so I think there's ways to do it so
that you're not like attacking the person. But if you notice, he
didn't tell her. Yeah, that's true. It didn't say it to her.
Right? Because I mean, I maybe once or twice, well, definitely
all the time. You know, people in public, they psychoanalyze other
people all the time. And they've never seen the other person,
right. Nothing is more aggravating than that. And sometimes it might
be true. And of course, there's the gold there. You never heard of
the Goldwater rule. No. All right.
Alex, you heard of it? No. Okay. Mark this ad tell ya, this is the
first time I've actually thought of anything else that x Alex
didn't know about it.
So when Barry Goldwater was being was running for president, all the
Democrats, they had psychiatry, psychiatrists, and psychologists
diagnose the guy, right? He's this, this must have happened in
his youth, blah, blah, blah, well, he loses the election. And then he
turns around, and he sues them all.
Right, and he wins the lawsuit, because none of it was true. And
their diagnosis was totally wrong. And their own code, the
psychiatrists code is that you cannot diagnose someone you've
never met. Right? So they made basically a they've altered their
own internal, you know, rules in the psychiatrists world that can't
do this anymore. can't diagnose somebody who's a positive thing.
That's interesting. That's why during the Trump administration in
the in the campaign before he got elected, there were people coming
on TV saying, you know, he's not my patient, and I've never treated
him Yeah, so this is not a diagnosis, but he seems to be a
megalomaniac.
Yeah, so that's the idea there that
labeling it might be really important for the for the person
involved.
But just when you actually say it to somebody it almost feels like
I'm getting diagnosed or doctors of like, you know Doctor sub
Mashallah.
Hindi
Egyptians think of Pakistani by their
look like in Egypt, okay. So Imam, Imam, doctor, whatever, you know,
my boy, so listen, hear me out on this stuff. When we talk about
labeling,
that the labeling has to happen, all of these things have to happen
internally first. Yeah. And that's where I think we as as not goofy
Sufis as your column, right. But you know, people have to So woof,
we understand the importance of regulating modulating the self
identifying the sicknesses of the heart, after you identifying
understanding where they come from, this is Lazada 101,
understanding the etiology of the sickness, what brought it about
within you, and then regulating the sickness, whether it be
Hassid, or whatever it may be. So I think the first place with all
of these skills with all of these skills of emotional intelligence,
they all begin within, they all begin within the self, and then
only after a person has begun to master the self, and started to
crack the code of themselves. At that point, do they become a
leader and a guide to help other people understand themselves as
well? So the labeling, I think there is a level of labeling when
you're dealing with another person, but labeling doesn't mean
calling it out. I think there's a difference between speaking it and
just knowing Okay, that's anger I'm witnessing right there. Yeah,
you gotta know it. Exactly. Exactly. And not just know it, but
pinpoint, like,
Yeah, but be able to be precise in identifying what the emotion is
that I'm experiencing at any given time. So what is samples of, oh,
go ahead. You're gonna No, no, no, I was just, I was just gonna try
to transition this into, like something that I was I'm recently
working on now. So that's emotional intelligence. Right.
That's basically what it is. And I think the thing to understand is,
that ajaokuta, Suliman and posi come Aziza
I think he might add it to the quality that he had to create in
these very, very hard hearted people was the quality of empathy.
And I know it's kind of cliche and all of that. But it actually is
very interesting because these were people that had callus over
their hearts. Yeah, I mean, you take the bearing of daughters
alive.
In order for that to become a socially acceptable thing. Yeah,
it's not a one off. It's a socially acceptable thing. It's
like, you're where you come from, oh, I was just out the, you know,
I was just bearing, like, think about the level of callousness and
hard heartedness that had to be there. Yeah. Now, the prophesy
centum, within only 23 years, is now trying to take these people
and really break down. And you know, carve away at that the rock
that had become the heart, and bring that soft heart out again,
so that it became something that could be come alive again. And so
as he's on it, he managed to miss a huge part of understanding how
he was so effective in causing a change within the people that he
interacted with. And I think that nothing can change a hard heart
more than someone harder, right? Namely, what I mean by that is,
someone who has no fear of anything, can only change through
the language of fear. And we can't underestimate the role. And the
verses about xh, urbania and jahannam.
Right, where the prophet is not just coming and softening. He's
also warning that if you don't start treating people the way you
want to be treated, there is a Bania they will take you by the
forelock their iron your your face, right took a big battle
right there. And if you want to talk about like you said, some of
these were akin to the like before their Islam, they were akin to
like gangsters today. Now, you cannot tell a gangster let me tell
you about in a boat of rivers, and cartons of milk, right?
But if you if he reads the verses of Jahannam Yeah, many people are
like, Oh my gosh, why so harsh? Because some people need that
language.
Some people need that language. And they're like, like, let's just
think about just this one a if it took a big battle, we will iron
out your forehead because foreheads like bumpy a little bit
right now we'll iron it out. Imagine that.
Right? Zephaniah noses urbania. All right. But he had own ideas.
And that was when you call your people we'll call our angels of
*, the angels that their job is to torture people. Now you're
thinking what kind of God created that? Well, what did humans do?
Humans made gangs, humans made governments that destroyed other
nations. Humans did a lot of bad things. So they actually need
angels their whole job. If you're scary, we're far more scarier than
you. Right? And we'll so so in the same thing I always say like,
requires to mat must match with like, right, like, has to convince
like, there are people whose hearts are that hard. But Allah
has angels whose I wouldn't say their hearts are hard in the same
expression. But they have no empathy, no sympathy. No, I would
even say hard. There's, there's narrations that say, some of the
angels of how are our blind and deaf Subhan. Allah, yeah, blind in
the bottle. They don't. Because if they saw what they were doing to
the people being given that punishment, they wouldn't be able
to Subhanallah that's amazing. So that idea here is that the
prophets I send them did come with that too. Because that's sometimes
the only motivation for person to behave.
Right? And just say, like, why would I treat a chicken nicely, or
cheat a camel nicely or treat a stranger nicely? Because one day,
I'm going to be standing in front of Allah on the day of judgment
and need to be treated nicely, because there are bigger tortures
than me out there.
Yeah, of course, it's important to mention that Arpita of Gehenna
Yeah. And what goes around comes around either in this life or the
next. That'll really quickly soften someone's heart. Hmm,
definitely. Definitely. Definitely. So I was thinking
about, you know, as you guys were talking about this was
you know, the idea that, you know, what, what hardens a heart to
begin with right is indulgence and being surrounded by by sin, yes,
to a certain degree. You know, you can call somebody away from sin,
but at some level, they also have to give that up in order to soften
their own heart.
And to be able to be receptive to understanding emotion, feeling
empathy, these things, as long as they're engaged in those things
that kind of keeps them in that state of
emotional stupidity.
In those terms, yeah. Yeah, definitely. I mean, even famous
Josie in julabo Caffee, when he he has a whole section on the effects
of sins. That's a very good read very, very beautiful. The whole
book is amazing, but just that part, he specifically mentions
that the hardening of the heart as a direct consequence of of the sin
and so I'm just echoing what you're saying. I think it's a
beautiful point to highlight that, you know, he was also distancing
them from the things that we're going to add. Right so the
sickness doesn't get worse. But now we have to treat the present
sickness we have to treat that in order to create that softness, but
there's no point in creating softness, if you're going to just
add on to the more things that cause the rust on the heart, right
so it has to be preventative and therapeutic at the same time.
Right so it doesn't get worse. Yesterday
when we to did a talk on Sheikh Mohammed Sahara Yan.
He, the his top student, his really his first student when the
Sheikh was teaching started teaching in message see to him and
did
he said that the ship had men hedge of four things. The first
was it last for only for Allah sake. Second thing was to solve
biller ditch which is to solve without any hoopla around it.
Okay, and then the third one was that we never change Allah's law.
We never change the Sharia, no matter who it pleases or
displeases. And the fourth thing was Jabril Khawaja
take being considerate of people's emotions. Now I thought that's the
recipe of a true Rabbani prophetic, godly scholar is that
those two things coming together are very rare. And let me tell
you, a lot of people, I believe that they have an axe to grind
with the world's may be against Allah, even when I was a biller.
And against OMA, they take it out by finding, what is it in the
Sharia, that the people don't like to hear? Hear it? Right, can't
practice it. And they want to pound you with that ruling. Right?
And make you feel so small and so bad and so wicked, right? But in
reality, it's using religion. And the idea of, I'm going to stand up
for the hop that nobody else is gonna stand up for. It's almost
like using that to hurt people. But he, he says, No, we do stand
up for everything in the show to
make sure nobody leaves our circle, feeling less feeling small
feeling in pious feeling dirty feeling like they're on the
outside. And I thought that's truly the combination of a real of
a godly scholar, as beautiful as someone who's about to say
something, you will say some sad. No, no, no, you'll just oh, there
was a lot right there. I mean,
right. I don't want to digress. But Dr. Shadi, I think that jabber
co author Yeah, you may be able to look at that from another
perspective, too. If we look at co opted from the perspective of
thoughts, yeah. And what you think about one of the things that was
really focused on by see the Amazon rulebook and also even
claimant, Josie is controlling of thinking, Yeah, so what Allahu
Allah, I just thought about that as the connection between the
ability to control thinking as a part of the reformation of an
individual, one of the things that is really an extremely important
part is it meant payment, Josie, he says, like, the brain is like a
mill. It's like a mill that's always going and never ever stops.
The idea of controlling what you think, in order to modify behavior
and even habits is something that goes all the way back to Jose
Belfry in the third century hegemony for cognitive behavior or
well being. So so well, I was just thinking about the concept of
controlling what you think about and controlling the thoughts and
regulating him and a majority he has this this deep thing he says,
bad bots, coauthor are not moving. They're like a mammography trick.
He's like, they're like people you walk past in the city. So you walk
in through you know, I don't know whatever city and there's people
that walk past you. The only time they will cause harm to you
generally, is when you stop to engage them. Yeah. You know, you
learn in the city just to walk past
As people, you know, I mean, and so he says thoughts are the same
way, that if you learn how to walk past a thought,
and keep it rolling, as we say, keep it moving, you know, then 90%
of the thoughts that you'll get, you won't be bothered because you
learned how to walk past them. He's like, the problem is we
stopped, I started talking to the thought, my Why are you here,
y'all? What you doing over here, and
and here's the thing, and time negating a thought it grows. So
what you just have to do is you have to say the opposite. And you
have to repeat the opposite and keep repeating the opposite.
Actually, I think that, so they need to start teaching this stuff
in schools, right, fine, but because I find, like, so much of
the world is suffering from, they're not suffering from
physical torture, like the Western Hemisphere, we're all stuff,
they're all suffering from this negative, you know, thought
patterns, and they just everything they uttered that comes out of the
mouth is negative. And they mistreated me. And it's this is
toxic, and that's toxic. It's all negativity. And it's almost like
they repeat it and, and they fight it. When you fight something, it
grows, right? Whatever you're paying attention to positive or
negative, it grows. I remember listening one time in radio, and
there was a guy who was so hated in the radio, but he was like,
you know, really successful. So like, how were you successful?
He's like,
because my employer doesn't care if people like me. He only cares
if they're listening. Right? So if I know that I can get people to
listen, all he needs is listenership. They don't have to
like me. Right? So as long as there in the audience is engaged,
his his ratings are up. The commercials are expensive, right?
So he says, If I can't get people to listen to me, because they like
me, I'll get them to listen, because they like to hate me.
Right? So I love to say something. And it'll make them all hate me
and talk, but they're talking about me. They're calling my show
yelling, right? Yeah. And I pissed them off even more. So anything
that you focus on? Positive or negative. And one of the things I
always try to teach like my son, I remember we were in a soccer game
one time. And it was a last minute we had fought for a tie. Right?
Against the best team. Last minute, we got a penalty shot
against us. So he's like, Oh, that's it, we're done. I was like,
Don't say that, say the opposite. Say, we're gonna do something good
is gonna happen, right? I made him say it right. And lo and behold,
the guy blasts it off the crossbar. Right. So we survived,
he couldn't believe it. So it's the reverse speech, self speech. I
think that's so important reversals. And I think it's so
important to do this with others.
Someone could be talking to you, and they're mentally and
emotionally going down, you actually have to stop it real
quick. And say no, say the opposite. and force them to say
the opposite. And, you know, reverse how they view. So this is
this is i We're not going to, you know, hamdullah it goes where it
goes. But I think this is really interesting point to bring up the
relationship between the cognitive and immaterial, and the material.
I think this is important. And I'm I'm piggybacking or, of course,
backing off whatever you just said, Right? Which is, like how
you can you said to your son, don't say that, right. Now it's
the opposite. Now check this, this is deep, this is deep. Do we have
within our religion, this idea that you can and please take it
within its context, you can manifest through speech. Now when
I study the shooting, and I look at multiple things, but first of
all, let's look at non trivial if you look at what is it what is a
placebo effect? What is an Acebo effect? What is a self fulfilling
prophecy? All of these are aspects of the cognitive affecting the
material, the biological material or the actual other person. So So
really quick, I know everyone knows already self fulfilling
prophecy. You know, I'm meeting Dr. Shadi for the first time I'm
like, Oh, this guy is act. He's arrogant guy, right. And so now I
project that arrogant feeling onto him. And now he feels those vibes.
And he actually starts to fit that role. He starts to go that way due
to my impression of him and how I thought and so then I see exactly
what I thought I was going to see if I did that. So there's multiple
studies. I mean, we've we've seen teachers that have been able to
make a certain segment of the class become more successful in
life because that group, they specifically said, You're so
smart, you're so smart. You're so smart. And so we have studies to
show this right. placebo effects well known the SIBO effect as
well. Yeah. What is that? The SIBO or placebo? placebo? Placebo is
the opposite where you think you're sick, and then you become
sick. Placebo is like, you know you taking the medicine for
something. So I bought a sorry to cut you
off, but it's funny because I thought you invented that word to
be no CIB. Were you saying I'm a C? It's minus C? Because that's a
good mental trick. Oh, it's minus seem to succeed. I'm trying to
highlight so check it out. Okay, cool. Where are you going with
this? All right, how about this? The prophets of Allah Azza wa
Salam is traveling for Hajj and let's just use this one example.
He's coming to Medina. There's a bounty on his head. Yeah, anyone
that capture him gets paid bourree the Islamic he's like I'm getting
that I'm getting that money. He takes 70 People with them. They
meet the prophesy some little bit outside of Medina.
Now you got to picture it, man. They got their weapons, they got
their whole crew. They roll in 70 deep and the prophesy Saddam was
walking with you know Abubaker guide and dis going. They meet
each other.
The prophets I send them asked him his name. He goes What's your
name? He goes bowrider now this is crazy. This is crazy. Alex Yo,
this is crazy. The prophesy salams looks at Abu Bakar and smiles. And
he said Bharat Allahu Allah. So Allah Subhan Allah, so for the
audience, but ADA has a root word of Baraka, which in Arabic means
cold. And so the Prophet took his name, one material thing one thing
from the world, and he's making that the reality so he looks at
aboubaker and he goes see Barnardo Allahu amarena Allah has cooled
down our affair Yeah, so then any smiles as if like it's hard to see
told you. Then he asked him again he goes what tribe you from? He
goes Benny Aslam. The prophets he looked at me he's like Salim na
made it we made it now there are multiple examples where the
prophet teaches that the way you think or speak is what will affect
the reality and what you believe is not now hold up hold up let me
connect it do ah how do we make dua oh god please give me this if
you want know what was Brother brother was like if you don't do
this, y'all Allah Yeah. Like in the Prophet said, Ask as if you
can't implore God. So as with everything you got. So what I'm
trying to say is like, the belief, and the belief is so powerful.
This has altered completely my interaction with like, my kids, my
wife completely, because if I walk in the room thinking she's in a
bad mood, it that's gonna happen. And I know it sounds tricky.
Everyone's like, Oh, what are you saying, man? Like, come on, man.
No, we the province. isonem is actually showing this in multiple
ways that the way you look at it is how it becomes
a difficulty. Yeah, now I was bouncing you stopped me. I was
literally tell him Alex, let him know what's good.
I'm with IMS. My servant thinks of me. There you go.
Guys into having a good opinion of a lot. Right? And what he has in
store for the future? What's best for you and the people around?
Yeah, that's right. Three levels. Three levels hold on the CBOE and
placebo means how I think of myself, my body will react to
that. The self fulfilling prophecy tells me how I think of other
people my they will respond to that. And then and then the Hadith
so you know what I always say man.
The Prophet sighs sometimes teachings are like, the software
without knowing the code language.
Like we don't know the code behind the relationship between the
cognitive and the immaterial and the material. We don't understand
that completely. Is there a connection between observation and
matter? Well, the Hadith tell us there are. Aisha literally is
taken out of the bag of dates. And she's like, I opened it up. There
were two left.
And the prophets I send them said, if you've never looked at it, you
would have kept eating from it. So Ron Allah, okay, okay. Okay. So
what does that tell us? Observation affects matter. What
do we know now about how light travels? Yeah. So hold on, but do
we really understand it? No. But do we have a prophet? Yes. We have
the software. We don't have the code language. Yeah, it's a great
point. Okay. We're looking at a shallow you know, I'm saying like,
it's deep matte. And so what I've been, this is some trippy stuff.
Because, you know, if you if you take manifestation too far, you
can obviously get into some Shirky type stuff. You know, I'm saying
like, even you and I, hopefully our audiences is short enough to
understand like, you know, yeah, so So I guess what I'm trying to
highlight is, I think it has come to me after studying this, that I
really can control and impact people now, there was a there's a
saying of I think his name was, uh, I always pronounce it wrong.
It's Goshi Gocek. It's like goeth II GO, GO tech right?
There is almost like an artist gotta gotta okay. So he has a
saying, which is beautiful. It's like, treat people as they are.
And they'll say that same the same way, but treat them as they can
be, and you'll see what they become. Yeah. And what I learned
from that is what aided us Let me was a criminal, a bounty hunter,
but the prophesies sort of treated him as what he could become he, he
can become a believer. And that's what he became. That's what he
became. So I think often we deal with people in a way that kind of
determines how they're going to interact. So now let me say one
more thing. You know, you have a friend that's sick. What did the
prophesy said? I'm saying when you go visit him.
Oh, you're getting better already, man. Yo, you got mad years ahead
of you, bro. Yeah, you're looking great. Why? Because once he starts
thinking that Subhan Allah you know, what you bring up a great
point is that there's an incident of the Prophet peace be upon him.
He's he visits a man in Medina, he's an older man. And he visits
him and he says, Learn to hold on inshallah. No problem. It will be
it's a purification for you. And the man says, No, this is a severe
fever that has come to an old man that will take him to his grave.
And it killed him and the prophesy centum said that that's what it
is. That's what it the Surat Allah. So.
And I always wondered, you know what the worst thing in medicine
is that they know that placebo effect works.
Right? But they've never translated it into the behavior
and the words of the doctor. So they know that placebo effect
works. It makes people sick or not sick. Just by belief. Why don't
the doctors now and the nurses like literally put on acts of
positivity for the patient? Aloha. Come in, congratulations.
Unbelievable. What kind of test results you produce for us. You're
gonna get they're gonna get so
this is what you do. This is what you do. You gotta they gotta find
a way right? To merge the two because I can guarantee when you
talk to people like that. Any any father kindergarten teacher
something if a kid comes with a little gash on his hand.
If you get nervous, it bleeds more right? And the kid cries the kid
cries for sure. I don't know about the blood but the
abuse better that's why
I had to call y'all my bed. If you shoot them off, wash it. Right and
put a bandaid he's out playing
another one he thinks like Oh, I got I'm gonna I'm really hurt you
start limping
even though it's
so true. Yo, this is so so go ahead Alex. Super great. So this
this this concept is this why the brothers in Texas are shoulder to
shoulder with no mask and you're doing fine
because they just they just have a good opinion of their immune
system you're that's up north man in the in the I ain't gonna call
out No No, I ain't gonna call out the axe you know I say we have we
have one of our guys down there Maureen is down there right now
and he reported back
Yeah, got the workload checked.
He said it was so he said it was so straight down there that so
what what our goal was like, oh, no, I don't wear masks regularly.
I forgot to take it off. I'm sorry.
You're on No, he's up in Plano. Oh, no, maybe I ain't seen it like
that. Yeah.
Well, check this out. For the listeners out there I checked out
manifestation and law of attraction and all that stuff. I
guarantee you you have more when you know the Creator Himself is
far more powerful. Because these guys you cannot take the analysis
of how the non believers in Allah do things right and how they view
the world and how they achieve and then apply that when you do have
the creator on your soul. You do know the creator is it's an
insult. I'm in my opinion right now you can look into it and
examine it. But if I want to get from point A to point B, all
right, the non believer has said I got the shortcut. And that is keep
thinking it. Keep repeating it. Cheers.
So you will get there. All right? That's might be true. But how can
I accept an equation that does not have a line? Right? I can't accept
it. Not only I can accept, Allah will not accept it. I guarantee
you is you have me. Why are you going to take it from them? You
want to achieve something? And I'm, and Allah is there in the
last third of the night coming to you waiting
for that language, but I'm sorry, I say I'll say this only because
it's necessary to say I think because it's the wife. It's a
broad audience. Anybody that does something like that, absent, you
know, that goes, I'm going to do manifestation or I'm going to do
the secret or whatever that is, right? Yeah. Even if you find some
successes, only olam is guiding you. It's only a law granting it
to you. You're not doing yourself Allah is granting it to you as a
means of further misguiding you because you've you've abandoned
your Eman. Yeah, yeah, yeah, guys, I think it's important. I love
what you're bringing up because you like I tried to indicate to
like, you don't take this too far. We believe everything happens by
the will of God. But let me add something. So there's this concept
within Islamic causality discussions called trajet. The
dual Antheil. I hate to get too deep for a moment, but you got an
educated audience somebody loves to genital unsolved means this
every moment instance. Every moment, in instance, in the
creation is a new man of is a new reality that God creates. And so
the example is a rose isn't continually read. I'm sure you
guys probably had podcasts on this before. But a rose isn't
continually read. But in every moment, God creates Allah subhanaw
taala creates that redness in it. And so we have this as as Muslims,
we have this understanding, like the fire burns, by the permission
of God, the knife cuts by the permission of God, right. And so
there is a bit of a difference amongst theologians and stuff like
that. But generally speaking, this is kind of an accepted
understanding, right, generally speaking. And so when we're
talking about manifestation, when I bring this up, I'm just trying
to show you some things that the prophets I sent him as highlighted
about how you need to be a positive thinker, and how those
things can influence seem to have an influence. Now let me go a
little deeper.
The prophets I send them used to do to play to fire old but not to
tell you what does that mean, he would not take bad omens, but he
would take advantage of good omens as we just saw. So whenever there
was a bad omen, a bad something, it can be anything like, you know,
for us a black cat or, you know, I don't know, glass breaks, I don't
know something, you know, he would never recognize those. Yep, it's
nothing. Stock Finola, that's sheer, what do you talk about?
That thing's not going to do not me. But whenever there's a good
omen, he would take that as a sign. See, Allah help us with
this, Allah has helped us with this. So it you know, it needs to
be said, everything I'm saying goes back to that by the
permission of God, these things will happen in sha Allah to Allah.
And so I'm with you, 100%. We definitely want to make sure
people understand that point. Let me add something else.
If let's say we can hypothetically say that law of attraction
manifestation is a means it's a setup, maybe it's not as concrete
because it's unseen. It's like mental. But let's say it's a
creative means to an end, right?
The moment Allah cares for him his dunya and is accurate.
Okay.
That's the difference. So money is a means to an end. If I got a lot
of money, I can do what I want. If I learn the law of attraction, I
can achieve what I want, right? But does Allah want us to achieve
everything we want? Sometimes we may want something bad for us.
Hmm. So that's why even if hypothetical, let's take it to its
logical conclusion, in a positive sense that it is all true, that
your mind does move the universe? Does that necessarily mean it's
good for you? That to use it how you want? No, you have to use it
by first asking Allah through is Takata. Is this good for me? Not
only my dt in my dunya? Is it good for my echo? So that's one thing.
Let me tell you a second thing. We do have our own way of
understanding what they've experienced what people who are
not Muslim have experienced by repeating something having
positive thoughts. First of all, it's all hosted on villa. Right?
That's number one. But number two, there's a story we have in our
about the benefits, right? It has no Senate in Islam, right. But we
do accept we transmit it and the meaning of it is sound. And I
asked my own Sheikh Sheikh Mohammed about this should be the
story goes as follows saying the Musa alayhis salaam was approached
by a woman from the venue so he says I want
A baby.
ask Allah to make me pregnant because they couldn't get
pregnant.
Allah He walks away and he says, Oh Allah, this servant of yours,
she wants to be pregnant. She wants a baby. Allah says catch up
to her, Athena. I wrote that she's buried in the Book of Destiny,
she's barren. So he says,
Allah wrote that you are off team, so I'm sorry, you can't have a
baby. So she comes back to him and the next gathering. And she said,
Ask Allah again. Because her emotion was so strong, it override
this theology of right, that your Prophet just told you. Allah just
told you, an Arab Baron. You should give up at that point but
her emotion, emotional tied to having a child was that so strong,
it just override it that that that?
She said, No Musa goes and Allah says Again, gets up to half demon.
I wrote the cheese burn. This happens a third time. On the third
time.
Allah says Ye Musa catch up to half demon. Now it's almost like
I've said it three times, right? She's barren.
Later, one year later, Satan, the moose is walking by a group of
people. And he sees that woman carrying a baby.
And he says, oh, whose baby is this? Yeah. Matala. She said, Oh
Musa, it's mine. Allah gave me a baby. He said, It's your baby. He
said, Yes. She said, Yes, it's my baby. He walked away a little bit,
and said, Oh, Allah. What happened? You said she was Akeem.
He said, Yes, I had written her to be Hakeem. But she kept repeatedly
saying yes to him. And every time she would say yes to him, it would
wipe away my destiny that she's yet she is again because my mercy
outweighs everything.
Well, so I asked my shit, explain this Senate wise and meaning was,
he said, As for the Senate, it has no Senate, but it is not Moldova.
It's not fabricated. Which means that it's one of the stories of
Venezuela that has come down probably from the early Jewish
Muslims like Cabot Akbar, right? Who was wonderful Tabby, everyone
loved Cabot. And he used to tell the all these stories of Ben
Israel. So he said, so I said, Can we narrate it? He said, Yes,
because none of the automat said is fabricated, so you could
narrate. It's not a lie made up. So I said, Now explain it to me.
He says Allah has a low hanging fruit. Nobody has access. Oh,
sorry. Um, well, ketchup. Nobody has access to that except Allah.
Nobody could say what's in it.
Then there is a local muffles Aloha, my food is for the all the
heavens to see. Right? And it's what's going to happen. However,
at low Helma food can be altered with dua,
and it may be altered with sins because the problems I sent him
said a man can be deprived some of his risk because of sins.
And I said, Okay, he said, Now you may be asking, what's the point in
having a Book of Destiny that can be changed? He said, to show His
mercy and to encourage dua. Oh,
this woman was told by the greatest prophet of Allah, she
witnessed him at the time, he was the greatest of the messengers of
Allah to be on the earth. And she witnessed the Red Sea open in
front of her own two eyes. Okay. She witnessed, okay.
Musa going to speak directly to Allah, directly. And Allah said, I
wrote her barren yet her.
She kept pushing, she kept persisting, right, and Allah to
grant it to her and the amount of cod and you teach in the Jetta
lane, right? He translates this or he gives it up see it in yam who
love Oh my gosh, that was between the woman Kitab so when the when
the manifests and Law of Attraction people say we're co
creators with God.
They misunderstood. Okay. And um, they're not even speaking
theological language anyway, right? They're just saying what
they, so they have experiences like this, maybe not like this,
but the experiences where they keep thinking something and it
happens. But we have our own understanding that Allah to Allah
does alter what's in the low Helma food, when a Muslim proves Himself
faithful and believes that Allah can and his cards are adequately
shape.
And that story of Musa and the woman is the best example of that
beautiful, that in and of itself is like you be tested by a lot,
right? Yeah. Is when you are put into a position where, you know,
you're asking for something, you're asking for something.
You're asking for something. And, you know, if somebody gives up and
says, Well, you know what, this is not going to happen. Yeah, that's
when it's not going to happen. If you add it right, and if you're
consistent with their dua, then we do believe
If that that, you know, in one way or another, Allah will answer your
DUA. And let me tell you something, how many times did you
make dua for something, someone's making dua for something and then
peep. Someone will say, Well, maybe it's not good for you,
right? And they say, oh, yeah, you're right. So I should stop.
But wait a second. You don't know what's destined. Why don't you say
maybe it's very good for you. It's the same because you don't know
the what's in Allah's book anyway. So all you have to do is qualify
it, right? And from the adab of dua, is to qualify. And to
summarize, you know, that it's people don't know this, but I
someone sent me a DM I can't I have to get back to him because I
but I can't find it. There's so many different channels. He says,
I very specific with my dog, I try to look for the loopholes. I try
to close the loopholes. Right. And he's nervous. But the Sahaba used
to teach their children when they one of one side of whatever your
car saw his son saying, I want in Jana, it to look like this, and I
want this and I want that. And then said his son said no, no, we
never did this in the time of the Prophet. As for Jana, and it
includes all that, right? It includes everything that you
imagine you don't have to say it. Dua should be minimal, which means
summarized, right? Summarized, and general and qualified, if it's
good for me, right? That's the right way to do dua. And Alex, and
then I'm going to ask she can McHale about locus of control?
Yeah, so So I just while we're on top of that, I just want to say
something that I'm sure it's not original, but I didn't hear it
from anybody else. Yeah, but I'm sure I'm not the first person that
this occurred to.
You know, one of the one of the things about that, and we all know
this is one of the basic things you learn when you first become a
Muslim or when you're growing up as a Muslim is that your dies
either answered immediately, it's delayed, or it's delayed until
Jana, right? Yep. Silly until until they
just make dua all the time, always sincere God following all the adab
of dua, but make dua all the time, because even if you don't get it,
don't give up because it just means you're gonna get it in
paradise. And in the Hadith, the people in Jannah, when they see
the die that's answered in the afterlife will say, I wish I had
never had a single guy answered in the dunya. But why would you stop
making that build, you're just adding up good for yourself. And
you continues continuously remembering Hola, so you have to
state some of the MSA, you know, either indikatoren roughly. So if
you're making your own zip code, and you're avoiding being roughly,
let me tell you something else, too, when they say that dog can be
something better, or something different or protection from and
something bad. And people think, well, I don't really want that. I
want the thing itself. Right.
Right. So because but but let me tell you that when Allah answers a
DUA, in whatever way answers it, you will be happy. Right? Because,
and many people don't realize when this happens. So whenever you go
to visit someone sick, or you hear a calamity, and like, you get a
message and you say, oh, so and so just died of brain cancer, so and
so just had this accident. Someone shows kid, like is going to lose
their leg or something like that. Yeah, right. And then someone
utters a comment says, Man, Subhan Allah. We never had a lot of
money. But 100 Our kids are healthy, right?
That's you just uttered the answer of your DUA, human, that is the
replacement of all your failed business ventures. You said it
yourself.
You just said it. You said, well, we don't have a lot of money. But
hamdulillah I'll take the trade off. Why would you bring that up?
Yeah. Like why would you bring that it was a trade off. It came
from you, because that's from Allah telling you I didn't answer
those. I answered that I gave you this instead. So you uttered it.
Another one. And I'm actually writing a release article about
this tomorrow post about this tomorrow or the day after is that
I remember one time there was a youth in the community. He was all
crazy about soccer, goes to a soccer tournament. And he bombed
as it did terrible. He was so distraught, so upset, right? So
happened, it was like NBA Playoffs. Someone said to him, we
got these extra tickets, right? You want these extra tickets, it's
like, was like a day later. He gets these really good, very close
tickets into a playoff game. And he gets there. And he says, Man, I
take these tickets over a soccer tournament any day of the week.
Which made me think again, why did he link those two together? That's
just Allah to add to bringing it out to show you. When Allah to
Allah does that to a person you utter it? Right. And that's the
sign that he didn't give you that he gave you something else. Yeah.
And you said it yourself instead of yourself. Wow. Yeah. So what is
this locus of control? Oh, yeah, yeah, so I just
So I sent you the article and Shala, you guys are going to be
publishing the article soon. That one of the topics is, it's related
to what we're talking about, because we started talking about,
you know, a little bit into tuck did and one of the consequences of
being a very tuck not took a DD people but people who believe in
other is you can develop what's called an external locus of
control. And so there's two types of people generally speaking, the
internal locus of control versus external now, the internal locus
of control people, these are people who are go getters, they,
they, they think that it's all up to me to get the job done. And
they every obstacle is not an obstacle, they immediately think,
How can I get around this? No, we got to do this, we got to do that.
And so the benefit of having an inner locus of control is you're a
go getter. And the end because you're so much of a go getter,
you're tend to be more successful than the other people just because
of ratio like you tried more than the other person.
And so that's a great positive side. Now, when you read modern
psychology, they'll make you think that the best thing in the world
is an inner locus of control, but from a chronic perspective, and
this is all in the article from the Quranic perspective.
And the prophesy some undoubtedly had a very deep inner locus of
control. But what's the downfall of the inner locus of control?
When a person fails? Who has a very deep inner locus of control?
They take loss heavy Yes, because I failed I messed up now where do
we see that with the profit like a bath to nuts like a like you just
brought up he took his not failure but in his eyes he thought he was
failing and it's very heavy on him. Very heavy on what I couldn't
do it and Allah is like no, yeah, Muhammad Yeah, so many verses I
teach him de la jolla lane by Allah Tofik you know how many
times my holy and so ut have to say, to sell Yelena betta Salim
Linda betta Sunderland, maybe this is consultant for the Prophet
consultant for the Prophet consultant for the Prophet.
There's another downfall of inner locus of control when you're
successful, in them out will Tito who Allah Illman in the
it was me, it was me, it was me. Now, let's switch over. What are
the what are the cons of outer locus of control? And again, what
do we mean by this? For the listeners? These are people who
generally think that they don't really affect the environment
around them. They're kind of resolved, they're like, yeah, it's
gonna happen. It's gonna happen here. Inshallah, people like me
inshallah. Inshallah. Inshallah. Inshallah, you know, now, what's
the con about that? They're not go getters, they don't any type of
obstacle is a confirmation of the fact that I have no control. Any
obstacle, so you told you, it wasn't gonna work? No matter. Some
stuff. Some studies say like, with your children, if you don't give
them responsibility, you can create a very outer Locus of
Control person, you got to really put responsibility on them. Like,
that's very important. But anyways, but what's the positive
of the outer locus of control? When they're successful? They
don't take all the glory. And when they fail, it doesn't hurt as
much. But they'll big.
They fall off the curb, they don't fall off the 10 foot building.
Yeah, yeah, it will try to go up. Yeah, exactly. So here's the deal.
When you read, you know, current understanding of psychological
like, like ideal states, they're gonna they make it like, enter is
the best thing in the world. Like, it's everything, your more, you
get more, you know, everything, okay? But when we look from a
chronic perspective, what I find is, the ideal is called an
oscillating locus of control. The oscillating locus of control is
the ability to move your locus left and right as per your need in
the situation. And so when we look at thought, if that is the ideal
example of an oscillating locus of control, he's doing everything he
can, everything he can, that means he's in or motivated. Every
obstacle he's going around in are motivated. And when he fails,
quote, unquote, fails, we know what I mean by that, guys don't
take it out of context. When he's unsuccessful and what he thought
was going to be success. He collapses upon himself. And he
says, in lemmya, can be good or bad.
I don't care about the outcome.
That is the that is the the highest point of an external locus
where you're like, I don't care do what you want to do. I submit now
that is good when it was coupled with a
action. And I have one more Hadith to prove this, I will dilute
Hadith two men come to the Prophet with an argument the Prophet sighs
Saddam decides for the favor of one person the one other one who
he decided against walks away he's like hospital Allah winyah Mela
que Serato the prophesy some causing but this is a second
generation it's an almost all the prophesy some says bring them
back, bring him back.
And then he says in the La Jolla Lumo Allah lodges
in the La Jolla, Lumo Igea Lu, Allah finds it blameworthy for you
that you're not able to do something. When you try your best,
and then you fail, then you say hospital, Allah would not matter.
Because Thank you, it's literally literally talking about an
oscillating locus of control. You're literally talking about the
ability to be self motivated, and truly believe that you can change
your future
before the action, but then you got to be able to let the brakes
off. You gotta be able to like,
it's very tricky, and you have to be very spiritually deep in order
to make that pivot at the right time. And I'm telling you to
there's Yeah, good. I'm sorry. I'll just say one point is that
many people don't realize that if someone was to come and bring
something to you, you said, Oh, Allah brought it right. That's he
used that seven. You two are seven.
Right? Your desire is a seven, your movement is a seven. Right?
So why don't you think like that? Yeah. What I was gonna say is that
it is a very, it is a very subtle concept. But there's also a very
simple, like, speaking as the A wham. And for the WAM, there's a
you know, this hadith of the camel. Yeah, everybody knows,
right? Even the little kids know, tiger, camel and trust in Allah.
This is exactly that, right? So you take you do your part, right?
This is the locus of control, I have to make sure my camera is
securely tied to the post. Yeah, but then I give that up. It's no
longer in my head. I did my part. And now I trust in Allah. And
whatever happens is Allah's manifestation of Allah's power and
will, Alex, you find that a lot of people use that hadith. Like
obviously, we know everyone knows it. I find it's overused. For me
not having control.
It's not, I don't know what we know the prophets into Inshallah,
to Allah. It just, it seems to me that sometimes
we'll have one and so maybe my personal observation, no, no, I
find that I find that hadith Hadith period, are misused almost,
almost almost 99% of the time that anyone caught a hadith they're
misusing it. But I mean, it returns to like the statement of
the of the of the great Maliki automatic Eman. Wow. Right. Yeah,
that I would have been destroyed. I knew I learned Hadith and would
have been destroyed by it. Had I not known the faculty member.
Like without sick without a teacher to tell you what these
things mean. hadith is always misused. And this these are all a
man that knew the language. Forget about what people in America in
2021 or two it? Let me give you a different take on.
Yeah, sad. Go ahead. You talk first. But your mic is so low.
What happened to your computer? I don't know what's going on. I
don't know why it's so low. But probably a Mac. Yeah, that's
likely to answer I'll speak louder. Okay, I was gonna say,
though, is that what you find with you know what shipmate McCauley
was saying about the outer locus of control is that you see a lot
of irreligious people tending towards an outer locus of control
when it comes to something other than God, right? Like, oh, it's
because of this group, or this group that nothing's going right?
It's because of that guy that just didn't work out. Versus look,
these things are out of my hands. And it's in God's control. Yeah.
It's not in any man's control. It's not in any human beings
control. Ultimately, all of these things are in a loss control.
Yeah. tendency. And I think maybe that's the observation that some
of us have is that people tend to put everything on an external
force other than God as the reason for their suffering. Yeah. Are you
saying that this is why even atheism turns into actually shook
and worshipping other gods?
Yes. Wow. Well, you know, I think one thing one extra real quick,
Dr. Shetty real quick.
The reason I found this idea in reverse outer locus to be very eye
opening for myself, is because I started to ask myself and go
through different tests. There's different tests you can do to
assess my locus of control, like how do I normally how am i right
now this morning?
Hmm, I don't need a test. I'll tell you what it might
know but you know, there's days when I've I
Wake up and I'm lack of motivation. Not really. I'm like
I'm in the dumps, you know? Yeah. And I think this discussion can
help a person, kind of discover where that lack of motivation is
coming from. And for people who are in a position to help and
guide other people, even if it's your children, and you see a lack
of motivation, you should use this knowledge to say, you know, you
could do whatever you want to do in life. Yeah, no, I mean, we know
what that means, guys, right? Yep. You see, your son has no
motivation to do anything. This person now is showing signs of a
person with a very external locus of control. They feel they have
no, what's the word when you have agency, no agency whatsoever. So
now, I know based on these studies, and like, okay, this
person now needs to be empowered, you need to let them know the
sky's the limit, what you say matters, what you do matters. You
leave a footprint in the snow, whatever you want to say you're I
mean, I think that's where I find this to be beneficial for my own,
like, I gotta be my own motivation. And no one's gonna
come here and be like me go, Oh, come on, you could do this, I
gotta do myself, but for my children, for my wife, for my
brothers and sisters around me. I can use this to help me understand
how to, and then and then if someone's successful, that's where
I'm like, you know, you didn't do that, right?
That's what it has to be.
Alex, I just I just wanted to say that one of the big downfalls of
having this lack of agency that she was talking about is when you
make a terrible mistake, sometimes when you put your foot fully in
it,
and things go way down south, you feel like you've just been
victimized, whether it's by it's your fault, like you did it, you
made a huge mistake, you made a choice. That was terrible. And
something bad happened and you go, this is what this is what's
happening to me, because it's happening to me, right? Because
you don't feel like you had any control. You don't feel like you
had any agency, you don't feel like you were able to do anything
about what the result would be. So even though it's a result of the
choices that you made, you didn't think about it, you rolled with
your instincts. You ignored the warning signs. And now you find
yourself in a mess and you go I'm a victim, victim of this scenario.
I'm a victim of this society. I'm a victim of this person. I'm a
victim of my own
poor education of a victim of my parents know, rearing me, right?
You know, Alex that goes with the Quran. What for that to lose
money, we're losing one full circle. Like that whole concept of
blaming someone other than you know, multiple times. There's at
least five times in the Quran, where someone in the Hellfire is
like, it's your fault in the Yeah, yeah, it's like it's your fault
external locus of control. I'm telling you, this is like really
interesting. Go ahead. Here's another one. It's people are
afraid to be disappointed. Why they have this blame of others and
the lack of drive and desire is because if I have a drive and if I
have a great desire for something and I aim big and I jump high
Okay, and I jump for a you know, a high branch or a high fruit the
fall that'd be really bad. Possible I might get the fruit but
people are afraid to be disappointed and I have heard so
many was I don't set yourself up for disappointment but why don't
we talk about to what good reliance on Allah on that matter?
Because we know that you know, either CentOS and engine right if
you ask ask for Paradise and and automate I've said likewise,
automat have said if you steal steal gold right
it's just a saying it just heard it. I've heard it articulated in a
different way to me that's that's off the recording
I just have said that other articulation I've said that
numerous times in life it was goes I don't get it.
The the comments was all going to be what is what is it? We're not
I'm not saying? Well, I'm gonna say if you if you know it, you
know it and if you're not hearing it from me. So what they're saying
is even in matters of this world, if you're going to shoot for
something, because it's an act of faith and reliance upon Allah that
you take a big leap and say here I'm going to take the big leap.
Because you just said in Allah Yeah, loom in Allah Illuma idol. I
just Allah blames someone who is weak and puts no effort, right?
Because it's a lack of faith. So here it is pretty adventurous.
Something far off. I'm gonna go for it. And here I'm going to rely
on Allah. If I fall, I need Allah to pick me up. Because it's
probably not going to be pretty and that's why I said this stuff
needs heavy doses of spirituality that mean
Need to really know, have be able to physically and you have to have
the muscle memory to recite three, four or five joules of Quran.
That's the healing that you're going to need when you if you
fall, and you can't say if I fall because if you keep saying it,
it's going to happen.
Right? If you fall though, that person needs to have serious
spiritual experience in waking up for to hedge it doing serious
Allah on the messenger, we're sending a lot of Quran because you
will need that to heal yourself from that fall. But if you do heal
yourself from the fall, you're like, wait a second, that far
wasn't so bad wasn't so bad. So I can actually jump a lot further.
Like we get to do it and do it again. Finally, you have no fear
now, right? You have no fear. And so when you have no fear,
remember, I told you the story the first time I got punched in the
face?
Tell me that story. Oh, I said it. They're gonna make fun of me again
on the podcast, but I was it was one to eight, right? I was one on
eight. Oh, okay. And I was like, and the guy comes up, and he gives
me a, he's basically punch him in the face is that was that bad? I
thought it would be far worse. It's really not that bad. I'm
telling you. That's the best. That's one of the best things that
ever happened. Because you're always afraid to get hit in the
face, right? When you finally get hit in the face by a vicious
person, right. And you're like, it wasn't that bad. You still talk
around with your head, you start walking around a lot freer. You
see you have a lot freer because it wasn't a big deal. Right. Same
thing. We want to talk about trust in Allah to what good Allah Allah
is oftentimes used by the cowards, right?
When we do something, let's use our creativity to see how this
thing could go wrong. So we could do to work on and fill in those
holes. They don't see how it could go right? And then rely on Allah
if I fall off the cliff. I hate to be redundant, but I and again, not
to male bash or anything, but I think young men 16 1415 up to the
20s adolescence is getting into the 30s I think now, but
men young, they don't block it.
Oh man, it's crazy. I just got
in, like there's a there is a problem with lack of motivation,
right? Lack of drive, lack of motivation. And I think what we're
talking about here, you know, is really, really encouraging to
young people in general. And it sounds cliche everyone thinks is
cliche, but I mean it from the core of my heart, man. If failure
wasn't an option, what would you try? What would you go after? You
don't like and I know it sounds like all you know you are you
coaching us whatever. No, I I truly feel that we have the
prophesy sentiment so many narrations has hiked have high
Azhar em. Yeah. You know, even thema Josie wrote a whole like
article on Oluwole hemma. Yeah, he writes a whole article on he's
like, I had been afflicted with Oluwole ima. What is Google him?
He's like, I want the best of everything he wrote this article
is absolutely amazing. It's literally called Google him and
you can look it up. But even tainment Josie, I believe it's
even came as Josie not the other Josie. Even Josie. Josie? If you
don't Josie, isn't it? It'd been a joke thought so yes. It's not even
claimed matches with Josie. I know we'll hit my matches. Exactly.
That's why but this is not even a male Josie. This is even on Josie.
So those who want to look it up. I read this when I was a student,
and you read it and it's just about how he's like whatever I
study or read. I want to go all the way in that. And and maybe
there's people that would you know, nowadays, you know, someone
who's a specialist, a general specialist, they call them right
or something like that. Yeah. I just think it's important to
encourage the, you know, people in general, you got one life, man,
you got to really push yourself to what God is there for your
ascension, not for like Dr. Shadi was saying like to what goes on
the back end of stuff no to what will appeal to what goes up to
what go as you climb, man. And I have a theory and it's might sound
disgusting to people. But I think it's really true. I think we were
talking I was talking to Alex yesterday, the other day about
this. And I was saying that so much human drive. Right is or
human energy is driven by the desire for intimacy with a woman.
Yeah. And I believe but as a theory, if people are getting that
out through *, it's deflating that energy. Right. And
that may be why they simply don't care because why would they
they've deflated that need for intimacy through a false intimacy
that they just get whenever they want. Have you read Dr. Leonard
Sachs on this or No, no, no, no.
After Leonard Sachs says there's two more aspects of them. One is
the financial burden to there's no more financial burden on young men
at all. Like, there used to be this thing. Like, if you don't get
the job, then there's no breadwinning in that family and
you're not going to. And now it's like, no, she's she's, she's sure
she'll she'll take care of it. Right. She's got it. So he
mentioned that this is our mind, this is going straight from him.
The third thing, so it's the desire for intimacy, the desire to
be a breadwinner, and the tribe, the sense of honor of the tribe.
Yeah. You know, like, I say, to my boy, like, I started doing this,
I'll be like, Yeah, we Smith's we don't do that.
Yummy. We're Smith's, we don't do challah, you know, and I got it
from I can't remember where I read it, whatever. But there's just
kind of, like, I'm making it up wherever. But like, honor to our
name. Yeah. And I'm American guys. I don't have no like, no, like,
honor.
Y'all feel me on now? No, if you know what I mean, but but I'm
creating that with him. I'm like, yo, we're Smith's we don't lie.
Anything. We don't know. That's really that's really good. One
day, he's gonna come to us like, but we create fake religions in
Utah, though.
So difference with
that's the other side of it.
No, but so there's, there's this thing about, I can't be I don't
want to say a loser. That's a harsh word. But I can't be someone
who doesn't strive because I'm putting a bid to my my name and my
family. But we've destroyed family. We destroyed any
institution that you owe anything to. And we literally say you don't
owe anyone anything. Yeah, you come into the world. And the
moment you come in, everyone owes you everything. But no one owes
anyone anything. It's kind of really a weird oxymoron. But
anyways.
This I agree 100% with Dr. sexes, analysis there. I mean, one of the
big things is, and you know, I'm ready for the hate mail, I don't
care. The
fact that men don't have to get married anymore. It has destroyed
so much of what made society good.
Like, it used to be like you had to have a good job, there have to
be a master's degree in a you have to have a good job you have to be
able to provide, and then a worthwhile woman would marry you.
And then you could have a relationship with her and build a
family. Now you're just doing whatever from like middle school.
Yeah. So by the time you become an adult, you go, why would I even
get married, I can live in my parents house, they'll die
eventually I'll inherit, I'll inherit the house. I don't have to
buy a house. I can play video games as much as I want. And I can
swipe on an app. And you know, do what I got to do and be back home
in an hour to catch up with my boys. Yep. And this is heavy. We
don't have time. Maybe we do. So one of the things I told you like
I'm working on the book on listening, right. So one of the
things I'm introducing is Dunbar's social.
SubhanAllah. What's it called? Social mind theory, social mind
theory. This is crazy stuff, guys. So Dunbar basically has this
theory that there's layered interaction levels, layered
interaction levels of networks, we have a layered network. So
basically, he says, like you have a core group of your immediate
family, right? And then he's like, multiply times three, it goes out
a little bit. So you have like 15 people there, then you multiply
times three, that's another core group. All right, then it keeps
multiplying till he gets to 5000. And these are people who you know
their face, but you don't know their name or something like that.
This is interesting. He basically says that one of the reasons we
the human mind has grown and evolved to be so large is because
we are a mammal that has a very complex, a very complex social
system. Yeah. Any animal that has a smaller brain, he's shown how
they have partner hookup relationships. This is crazy. Like
reptiles, they don't have lifelong partners. It's hookup it's
literally hookup culture. So
it's crazy. Like the studies are literally saying, like a sign of
the human evolution to a having a large brain was our ability to
have life long partners and intricate relationships and core
groups of people. And so what we find interesting is people
reaching into the furthest layer of associates and people for the
deepest levels of intimacy and not providing intimacy within the core
groups, what do I mean by that? My little costume who just came in,
he needs me for intimate dialogue and discussion and wrestling and
playing. But if I'm spending time on the external layers, then I'm
neglecting that core unit.
So the reason I'm bringing this up is because, you know, our
discussion on our discussion on listening and our discussion on
the family, it goes back to understanding the needs of that
core group. And now once you break away that core, I'm just alone
molecule like just going around, interacting with whoever's going
to interact with me, I still need intimacy. So I'm gonna swipe
right, which means I'm going to get the deepest level of intimacy
in the most casual manner. And that is actually a sign of less
evolved in their language. creations are nearly one say
creations but less evolved animals have that tendency. Yeah. So it's
just mind blowing that you know, these things are studied and
understood. And at the end of the day, it just makes you so grateful
to honestly be a Muslim man.
You know, it just makes you so grateful to just say like Allah,
Allah, Muhammad Rasool Allah, because again, we have the
software, but we don't know we're still discovering the code. Yeah,
yeah. messenger of allah sallallahu sallam, he is the
messenger of the eternal. What will be learned for him is also
eternal. What will be gleaned from the messenger sunnah will never
end, Allahu Akbar. And you know that one of the edges of the Quran
is that you can never stop taking a benefit from the Quran because
it's Allah's word, right? And it's pre eternal and it has his
attributes. Because Because Knapp has his attribute, His Messenger
sallallahu alayhi wa sallam although is not his attribute is
his delille right and therefore, so long as there are Muslims to
take from the messenger they will find what is deleted to Allah to
Allah through that messenger size and meaning what is they're seeing
in their own lifetime, they'll see the solutions for that and the
brilliance of that in the messenger so the lies are deadly.
The Living shadow of the Quran if he is the shadow of the Quran, and
the Quran can never stop discovering something new
therefore the shadow will always be also producing something oh la
semana hamdulillah Dakka Dakka we kept you a long time
yeah, this was great and hamdulillah and thank you for
coming on and jolla not the last time after you're done with the
book let's do it again so that you maybe have some we didn't even get
into the topic so no, I know I'm gonna but this was really good
stuff. This was really
a lot of people will benefit from this video.
Thanks for having me guys. Just talk them a little bit. To all the
listeners you know keep good company that means physical
company or in just an environment of good words. And letting the SME
owners l o Fayette tab you want to ask those who listen to good words
and follow that which is best. That's that's what we do until we
meet Allah subhanaw taala so listening to good podcasts
listening to good things here and there. I don't know if Dr. Shadi
is on clubhouse yet.
Oh, they asked me to make an account but I never got it. I know
I'm with you. I'm a conscious consumer of social media conscious
consumer you know.
You know you don't bite on every hook they put into you know, yeah,
frankly, to be honest with you the graphics were not impressive. So
I've been getting the aesthetic and a lot about the makers to be
honest. That's true.
The graphics were bubbly and they're just it didn't look like
effort was put into it so
it's interesting since you made it that's another podcast you know.
So
look forward to the book please give ourselves the possum and you
know put them in a leg lock for us. Definitely definitely. Nelson
if he's still awake he's gonna get it
alright man go ahead Subotica
in into the stock photo connected with a class in a
Latina m&r
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asking God for good luck
he'll be there in the moment
his bird says no we're
magnificent
yeah
yeah
yeah
yeah
How
to be the
user
be.
Enough