Maryam Amir – Sincerely Yours, @yaqeeninstituteofficial
AI: Summary ©
AI: Transcript ©
For joining us for another episode inshallah of our live stream Talk
Show. I'm your host. Ibrahim Hindi, my co host Sheik daladuru,
he's having a little bit of
technology issues. His camera's failing him. Just you know, you
know how it is when you need something, and then the time you
need it, it just doesn't work for you. So Inshallah, he'll be
joining. He's just getting it all ready Vietnam, but we're happy.
We're here. Alhamdulillah, we're joined with all of you. And you
know, as you were with us last week, you saw what this program is
all about. Alhamdulillah, for us to come together, to have a great
guest on one of you know, the scholars or the teachers and the
preachers of Islam, the ones that you know and that you learn from,
they'll join us, and we'll get to talk to them and learn a little
bit more about them and who they are. And have you get to know them
better. You know, I think sometimes we want to know the Imam
or the Khatib or the Khatib or the speaker a little bit better. And
sometimes we don't get that chance. So hopefully this is going
to be that chance for all of us to get to know them a little bit
better. Inshallah, I want to hear from all of you both right now and
throughout the session Inshallah, the live session that we're going
to have. So let me know in the comments where you're from, where
you're coming from. Alhamdulillah, we have sister Fatima from North
Carolina, Salama Alaikum. Let us know where you're coming from.
We'd love to hear it Inshallah, and let us know your questions,
your feedback, your comments. There is a link in the description
where you can send us your your feedback and suggestions. If
there's a topic you want us to talk about, if there's a speaker
you want us to have on as a guest, you know, let us know we want to
hear your suggestions, and in the chat, let us know if you have a
question for our guest. Inshallah, so that we can, you know, know a
little bit better, be at the about you know what you guys want, so
that we can hopefully be able to get it for you. Inshallah, I see
Brother Ali buchari from Ottawa, mashallah, good friend of mine.
Thank you for joining us. I see Tahir Zakaria from Egypt, from
Bangladesh, Shoah,
jazakamakir, salaam, Alaikum. Thank you for joining us all over
the world. Alhamdulillah, we have people joining us. And we love to
have it. We love to have so many people from so many Muslims all
around the world. Michelle from Toronto, Canada, which is where
I'm coming from, Alhamdulillah. It's good to see other Canadians
and Torontonians on this platform. Alhamdulillah. So
you know, we're going to have a great program. We have a great
guest as well. Inshallah, we're going to be able to, you know,
have a great conversation. We want to know the questions that you
guys have.
You know, we have a question already about martial arts. I
know, Alhamdulillah, our guest is an expert in that. So that's going
to be great. I see Brother, brother Ali from New Zealand,
salam alaikum, masha Allah, all over the world, UK, Malaysia, the
US, New Zealand, Egypt everywhere. Alhamdulillah, we have people
coming and tuning in United Kingdom, Ghana, masha Allah, so
may Allah, you know, bring our hearts together, may Allah allow
this ummah to feel, you know, genuine love for each other, no
matter where we are in the world, that we all love each other for
the sake of Allah. Subhanahu wa so. Inshallah, you know, we're
still waiting on my co host, Sheik Abdullah dura. He's letting me fly
solo, which is not usually a good thing. I'm waiting for him.
Inshallah, hopefully you'll be able to join us during this
session Inshallah, but I think without further ado, Inshallah,
we're going to have introduce inshallah our guest,
Mariam Amir, who received her master's in education from UCLA,
and she holds a bachelor's in child and adolescent development
and a second bachelor's in Islamic Studies from Al Azhar University,
and has memorized the Quran. She also has a second degree black
belt in Taekwondo, masha Allah. We're great to have sister Mariam
with us as our guest. And you know, I've been following you
online for a while, and actually think you've been doing amazing
work, and that's where we're really happy to have you. Jessica
alchem for joining us, it's such an honor to be here. Mashallah,
I've been following your work and yaffin's work for so long. It's
such an honor and a privilege to be here. Monica, lofiko, wafiko
mahameen, so you know a question I like to ask people when we start
off, because I think it applies to everyone you know, sometimes our
brothers and sisters who are new Muslims or converts, you know,
every time they walk into a room, somebody's like, you know, how did
you convert? What's your story? And to the point that they
sometimes like, stop asking me this question over and over again.
But you know, had a lot whether you converted to Islam and our new
Muslim, or whether.
You've been Muslim, you know, and your parents are Muslim, and your
grandparents are Muslim, everybody makes a decision in their life at
one point in time to say that I want to be Muslim, I decide that
this is something I'm doing. I'm not just following what my parents
were doing or my grandparents were doing. I'm actually owning this.
This is something that I believe in. This is something I want to
follow. So let me put this question to you. You know, when
did you make a conscious decision in your life to become a Muslim
and to really believe in Islam? So that means, what Islam?
Alhamdulillah, I'm very fortunate and very, very blessed, hamdullah,
to have such a diverse family, or, Alhamdulillah, the majority of my
relatives converted to Islam. Hamdullah, sohamdulillah, he's
working on his microphone.
He's improvising, yeah, he's trying mashallah, can you hear us?
Chef, Bismillah.
Okay, hamdullah, we can see him. May Allah, bless him. Okay,
I'm going to make this not awkward and keep
talking. Hamdullah, I'm very blessed that my parents were very
intentional about the way that they wanted to raise me and my
brother raise us in a way that you know would focus on the love of
Allah and focus on this connection with God, but being born and
raised in California, being surrounded by Hollywood and the
messages that come with Hollywood, Islam, for me was like piety and
spirituality and Olivia. I didn't think any of those things. Hello,
oh, I have to go on there. It's going to disrupt us. Sheik, we
hear you.
You're good. Alhamdulillah.
Default with speakers. So go ahead, sister. I think you should
continue.
And you know, I think his son is probably helping him with the
technology.
I think this is a real really good time to ask, okay, oh, man, we
lost this problem. Um, alright, so basically, the point is, I wasn't
really sure whether or not I wanted to be Muslim, and I didn't
know if I believed that Islam was the truth. And even though
hamdullah, like my parents, had, you know, really found Islam in
college, and it was very intentional to choose living as
Muslims, and
it was something that I was not sure I wanted. And I had these
thoughts and these questions as I was going through school and in
high school, my parents decided that we were going to go take a
family trip to Mecca and go for Amra. And I remember the very
first thing that I said to one of my friends when I got back to my
public high school was, I don't want to change. I was so scared
that I would become pious or religious or somehow spiritual
after going to Mecca, because I heard that's what people do. I
heard they go to Mecca and they become pious, and then they just
pray all day. And as a high schooler in California, that was
not something that looked appealing to me. And Subhan Allah,
when we went to Mecca, I remember my parents both became very
emotional, and my dad, mashallah, he's like already a very like. He
is an he shows emotion, and it's a beautiful thing to see. But
Subhanallah, the first thing that he did when he saw the minarets of
Mecca as he just started to weep. And then my mom, as we were
walking into the Haram, she started to cry. And I remember
being a high school student and thinking, This doesn't feel like
anything to me, like I felt nothing as we were walking through
the outside haram before we got to the Kaaba. And my parents were
like, don't look until you get to the Kaaba itself. So that will be
the very first thing that you see inside of the haram. So I was
keeping my eyes lowered, hearing my parents weeping and thinking, I
don't feel anything. Am I supposed to feel something? I don't feel
anything. And then right when we get to the area where the cabba
is, and my dad said to look up, Allah,
it was like something just grabbed my heart and just SubhanAllah. It
is the feeling. It was the feeling of, there's this ayah in the Quran
and circle, and I am how Allah talks about the one isn't
the one who was like dead, and Allah brought them to life. And
that's how I felt, like my heart was dead and Allah brought it to
life. It was the first time that I actually felt my heart, and I
didn't even know that you could feel your heart. It was the first
time that I felt my heart, and I just immediately, I just started
bawling and begging Allah to to guide me, to forgive me, to to
help me know him. And that moment for me was so, so transformational
that in that moment, I was like, I want to know who Allah is. Like, I
want to know and my parents, may Allah bless them, they taking me
to the masjid all the time. I had learned how to read the Arabic
script. You know, my family is not Arab, and so I didn't speak
Arabic. We didn't know what Arabic, you know what I'm reading
in Arabic. But I had learned how to, how to just read the general
Quran. But it had been years since I opened the Mustaf. I.
So when we came back from Mecca, I was trying to read the Quran every
day. I was like, You know what? How can I know Allah by reading
his book? That's how I could know him, because it's his book, it's
it's his words. So I started to read the Quran every single day,
but I didn't understand it at all. I had no idea what I was reading,
and I was super slow. It would take me, like, two hours to read
five pages. So my mom, one day, she was walking past my room, and
she's like, why don't you read it in English so that you understand
what you're reading? And Subhan Allah that that moment, again,
changed my life. So now, why they go shave? Why
they come sit down to like, Kat, y'all can hear me, right? Yes, we
can hear you. It's an honor and blessing to meet you. Chef
barakash,
continue, came back from Mecca. You said, yes, yes, Alhamdulillah.
So I was reading the Quran in the English translation, and the more
that I read, the more that I felt like Allah was talking to me, I
would go to high school, something would happen. I'd come home, I'd
be like, bawling open the Quran to like a random person that I was
exactly what I was going through. And the more that this happened
Subhanallah, the more I just thought, I don't just want to I
don't just want to read this book. I want to know what it means. I
want to memorize it. I want to learn it in Arabic. I want to
learn the Arabic language. And so the more that I read the Quran,
the more that I change internally. I change externally, my goals, my
motivation, my objectives in life, the way, the way I saw the entire
world shifted, because the Quran is so powerful, so
transformational. The more that we the more that we connect with it
Allah, just because of the barakah of the Quran, Allah blesses us. So
it was such a gift from Allah, to first be moved by the Kaaba, but
second to just access his words. And of course, reading the Quran
in Arabic is the language of Revelation. But people always ask
me, like, well, what if I don't understand Arabic? And I'm like, I
didn't either, and it changed my life in the translation, even in
the translation, it can change your life. So really, through the
process of reading Quran, is when I decided that I just want to know
this book, and I want to know this religion. And that is the
beginning
of my journey. You know, it's kind of like that moment of seeing the
Kaaba. It's, it's, you know, nobody warned me about it, by the
way, like nobody said, my parents, Alhamdulillah, you know, they're,
they're very religious, and they had been going. They'd been
leading a Hajj group for a while, and
so they had gone many, many times. And then finally, one time I was
able to join them. And nobody, like, really said anything about,
like, seeing the Kaaba and, you know, just in general, like,
everything about Hajj and going for Umrah and et cetera is good.
But I just remember, like, the first time I went, we got to the
hotel, and I said, Okay, I'm gonna go do my Amra, and I get into the
the bus that's going to drive you closer to the Kaaba, to the
masjid. And I just remember like as he's churning and coming down
the valley on the on the road. And I just saw the Kaaba for a glimpse
for a moment. And it just shook me too. And, you know, I know so many
people have had similar experiences. I think, you know,
Allah Spanner with Adam, he talks about the cat, right? Calls it
meth attended us like it's a it's a place of retreat, right, for the
people. And one explanation, I just wanted to offer it, because
somebody mentioned it, and it really, you know, stuck in my mind
was that, like if you lived somewhere when you were a kid, and
then you've been gone for so long, and then one day you go back to
your childhood home, right? And so you're driving on the way there,
and you start to recognize, I remember this street. I remember
when I was a kid there, and I remember, you know, this area we
used to hang out. And I remember that area. I remember that's my
house, that's where I used to live. And all these like emotions
come back to you. That's what the Kaaba is to the believer, even
though they've never been there before. It's like your soul
recognizes it and realizes, Oh, this is, this is somewhere that I
get recharged. This is the place of retreat for me, subhanAllah,
and I think, like, your story is so powerful because it's just it's
on that message where it's like you knew something once you went
there, like your heart became alive. Subhanallah, oh, that's
very beautiful, and that reflection is especially of, you
know, these feelings where you have this like connection from a
very primal place. And I just want to also mention that I know many
people who have gone to the cabin and they haven't had these
feelings, and I know people who've had very difficult childhoods, and
so being reminded of their childhood brings a lot of trauma
for them. So I also want to make sure that this message is shared,
that one you know, the Kaaba is for the believer that weeps and
the believer that doesn't, but the believer that believes in the
sanctity of the Kaaba, we are all the same. So I think that is so
important, because sometimes when this expectation of I'm going to
have some sort of like emotional reaction, and that doesn't happen,
people then really begin to wonder, does this mean Allah has
closed my heart? Does this mean that Allah doesn't love me? And
the reality is that Allah asks us to take the action he never
requires us to have a particular emotional reaction, and Allah such
a gift to have that. But even if you don't, it's still blessed
anyway, the Kaaba is still blessed anyway you're going to.
The cab, but it's still blessed anyway. Subhanallah, yeah.
Subhanallah, firstly, I apologize for my little technical
difficulties. My producer slash director slash mentor. My son,
he's on his it was all set up world Shaka to Mario. I apologize
really, for
camera just shut off for some weird reason, so we're on my
laptop, but you know, mashallah, I'm so glad you mentioned that,
because a lot of times we as instructors and as as as leaders
or influencers in a community, on the member, particularly sometimes
we'll mention, you know, and if doesn't, this doesn't happen to
you, then you need to check your Amen, right? I'm so glad you
mentioned that, because I remember a sister was asking me, you know,
when I went to do this ceremonial practice, I didn't feel anything.
And they really felt bad that they didn't was I supposed to feel
something?
So that, that caveat that you mentioned is very, very important
into zakila for that, because everybody's different, you know,
and everybody has, just, as you said, subhanAllah Allah, you know,
people have had traumatic experiences, and you don't know
what they've been through and what they're currently going through,
or what they fear in the future. So they may be preoccupied with
something that could really alter or just tamper with, or even, you
know, be mixed with their their emotions and their feelings to
where at that time they may not be crying when everyone's crying in
the salon, you know, why don't you cry? Or why didn't you that sold
here for that mashallah,
absolutely so Stella, on your path, like you, you make this
decision in the Quran become so important in your life. Was there
ever a moment you know, during this time where maybe you
experienced some doubt,
where you you know, was it always just that moment, just you took
off after that and really immersed yourself in Islam? Or were there
moments maybe of doubt that you had to overcome? Yeah, so I get
really, really excited about Islam, and I am, like, so
passionate about Allah. And I just like, I remember one time I was in
college, and I was driving with one of my friends, and I we were
at a crosswalk, and there were like, maybe 30 people crossing the
street, because we were at by university crossing. And I was
like, Do you see that? She was like, what? And I was like, all
those potential Muslims, and she always reminds me of that, because
I was just like, so full of hope and Dawa and excitement, and then
the more that I studied with May Allah bless you know, random
sisters, whom I decided were probably knowledgeable because the
way that they dressed, they didn't have degrees, they didn't have any
sort of particular background in Islam. But I was like, they must
be knowledgeable, because they dress like they are. And so I
started taking, you know, Holocaust with them, and going to
classes with them. And Subhan Allah,
their messaging was particular, particular messaging, messaging
about how a woman should be and what a pious woman looks like and
sounds like and acts like, and all of that was the exact opposite of
my personality. So I am naturally an extrovert. I was told being an
introvert as piety, I am naturally very outgoing. That was totally
haram going out. In general, I should never leave my home, ever.
I mean, I was in college, but, okay, that might be a necessity,
but never for anything else. You know, you're supposed to never
give lectures. I used to give, I used to give lectures to, like, I
gave a lecture to the Governor of California, like I used to, I used
to make Dawa on, like, big stages with tons of people, like
politicians and like community leaders and trying to, like change
the perception of Islam and help people see that a Muslim woman in
hijab is confident about Islam. This was after September 11.
People were constantly asking about Muslim woman and hijab and
and all of a sudden it was like, no, no. The most, highest thing
would be for me to never be seen, to never be heard and for nobody
to ever recognize me. And so I went through this time where, one,
I wondered if Allah created me with my personality, because he
hated my personality, Abu DHA. And so I was so scared that I was
constantly making him angry by simply existing. So one, I went
through extreme doubt of myself because I was terrified of who I
was and how Allah created me, and I thought my greatest test in life
was just to be the opposite of how Allah made me. And then that's
different from the qualities Allah gives you, and you use them in a
way within the principles and the guidelines of the Quran and
Sunnah. That's a very different message. You have these qualities.
Let's figure out how we can bring them to align with your best self,
according to the Quran and Sunnah. And then secondly, when I was in
college, I took a course about woman in Islam, and I was going to
defend Islam from all the things that the professor said, but she
brought in one, you know, one Hadith, one statement of the
scholar, another statement of the scholar. And I had no idea how to
reply. I didn't know anyone who knew how to reply. At that time, I
didn't speak Arabic, I couldn't access the text at that time, I
didn't know how to reply, and instead of me feeling confident, I
started to worry that if I continue to study women's issues,
I'm going to become someone who's doubting these things. I just knew
that I had to close that door, because if I didn't, I was afraid
for my email and now a.
Hamilah, after studying for 15 years, I can say that the very
same a hadith, their very same ayat, the very the very same
statements, bring me so much healing. I can say, without even a
moment of a breath, a moment of hesitation, that the Prophet
sallallahu, alayhi wa sallam said this, but Allah said this, and I
know that they're for women, and they're powerful for women, and
that they're healing for women, and that there's wisdom in
everything that we don't understand. I can see that without
even a shred of doubt, but it took time for me to get there, and it
took mentorship, and it took learning Arabic and being able to
access so many texts and memorize the Quran. It was a process, and I
had mentors, and I think that these are some of the most common
questions that I received today from women. Constantly receive
questions on this line from women, and a lot of times it's because
there isn't the mentorship. There isn't the same sort of messaging.
The same sort of messaging I went through hasn't changed. It's not
gone. It's exactly the same. But I had processes mentors to help me
go through the process of learning what that means in my life and
understanding how that's going to change from place to place, or
reality to reality. And subhanAllah, so many,
unfortunately, don't have the access right now, but with Masha,
Allah, Yaqeen, and with Roberta, and with Jannah Institute and SLM,
there's so many online options now, Alhamdulillah, that people
can be based with these questions and learn about them. But
definitely that was one of the most challenging times in my
Imaan. Because one, I struggled with knowing even if Allah would
accept me as who I am, and two, I struggled with the messages that I
heard for women, and I didn't know how to process them. But
alhamdulillah, I'm so grateful to Allah. I'm always grateful to
Allah now, because if I hadn't gone through those tests, I
wouldn't be interested in studying women's issues and speaking with
women on the issues that they have doubts on. And two, Alhamdulillah,
I am just, Inshallah, releasing an app. Here's my shameless plug.
It's called Kariya. It's the woman Quran reciters app. Alhamdulillah,
we have women from all over the world reciting AMSA, masha Allah,
women from every area. Masha Allah, we have converts.
Alhamdulillah, three of our women have disabilities. Four of our
women, three of them are blind, actually, Alhamdulillah, now we
have five. Three are blind to have Down syndrome. Alhamdulillah mean
women from all ages and backgrounds and everything. And I
wouldn't have had the drive to go to like even ask about how to
create something like this if it wasn't from Allah, but also, if it
wasn't for the pain that I went through at that time because
hamdullilla, that Allah has kept me on the path. But I know so many
women who went through the same thing with me at the same time,
and now they're very they're they are living very different lives,
and they've made very different decisions. And I don't blame them.
I quit making dua for them, but I'm so grateful that Allah has
allowed me to go through that pain, to be able to see what I can
do with it now. And unfortunately, that isn't the case for every
single person, but I pray that Allah keeps, you know, blesses
them, heals them, helps us all go back to him. Because, you know,
honestly, that's, that's, that's something that's SubhanAllah. I
shouldn't have, I don't, I don't have any more words. I'm just
going to stop. But anyway, if Claudia is coming out inshallah.
Inshallah, you can download it by Ramadan, and if you would like to
sign up for the form so that you can register. It's on my
Instagram. It is at the Miriam Amir and the R, Y, a m, a m, I R,
there's a form in my bio, and you can sign up for Angela.
What is the sorry, just for me to know the app is for Muslim women
to memorize Quran. Is that how it works? Or So right now, when you
go on any, really, any website, when you look on YouTube, it's
really hard to find women's recitation unless you know who
you're looking for, and you know myself when I was memorizing
Quran, I was always listening to like, Abdul basits or min shall
we. And so when I recite, have a very deep recitation, and it's
because I was trying to mimic their recitation, because of their
the type the, you know, the sound of their voice. So I always have
women asking, like, where are, where are recitations that sound
like the pitches of our voice? Because we can't, we can't mimic
the pitches of the men, just we have different voices. And so
hamdullah, that was one of a million reasons. The biggest
reason, I will definitely say, is there's a huge shift in our
community where we are asking, Where are women? And there are
more and more women present, and there are so many women scholars
that Masha Allah, like we can list 20 off the top of all of our
heads, I'm sure. But I think for a long time, a lot of women grew up
without seeing women, and so they've wondered, can women be
scholars? Are women scholars. Where are women who are set Quran?
Can women even memorize the Quran? And when I was reciting Quran at
events where there were women only events, and we were leading salah,
like, like leading, I was leading a Salah. I was reciting Quran,
Subhan Allah. I would have, I mean, so many women come to me and
say, You are the first person I've ever heard as a woman reciting the
Quran. And the shift was so powerful, because it was like a
sister in her 50s who came up to me and she said, You are the first
person in my life, the first woman I've ever heard recite the Quran.
And I am in my 50s. And if I had known that I could have done it, I
would have done it too. And what do I do to do what you're doing,
like Subhanallah, the impact of someone who is.
You know mothers, young mothers, who are telling me that after
seeing other women, we say Quran, after hearing me talk about women
recycling Quran, instead of singing lullabies, now they're
reciting Quran for their children. And subhanAllah, a woman who's in
her 40s, told me that for the first time ever, she told her
parents that she's going to recite for them, and she recited for
them, and she said, my parents cried and said, This is the
greatest gift you've ever given us, like SubhanAllah. These
messages so many women saying, I had no idea. I couldn't remember
his Quran. I didn't know Quran was for a woman like it is for men. Do
you know how many times I've heard that I didn't know that the Quran
is like, the same for women, for women as it is for men? Why? Why
is that even a question? How is that a question? And some people
are like, oh, you know, that's ridiculous. Of course, the Quran
is for everyone, but there's a difference. When you see women
reciting, and all of the women, masha Allah, have memorized the
Quran they have, or they have ijaza, which is a certification in
Quran. They've been winners of international competitions. They
recite on television in their countries, some of their
countries, for example, some of the women, it depends on the area,
sometimes. But for example, the woman in Nigeria, in Tanzania and
Yemen in Morocco, in Algeria and in Tunisia and in Morocco,
Singapore, Malaysia, those countries have women in Quran
competitions and on television. We site in Quran and teaching Quran,
and they have it in different ways, but other women see that,
children, girls see that, and then they think, SubhanAllah. That's
someone I can aspire to be like. Our little girls have Hollywood
just like I did, and who are they going to aspire to be like? So if
we give our little girls examples of women who are Quran reciters
Inshallah, they are going to be able to say that's who I want to
be when I grow up. And I've heard that from so many women
SubhanAllah. I've been interviewing women on my
Instagram. So many mothers have said their eight year old kids
keep asking me, when is when is your next Instagram Live, because
they want to see the next woman. And they say, I want to memorize
the Quran too. So the impact is generational. When we invest
masala Allah in these areas, it is so generational SubhanAllah. So
anyway, that's some of the reasons why. But this is very long topic,
and I'm sorry that I took
it over. I think that's that's definitely, you know, something
that's needed. And you know, Alhamdulillah, Allah blessed me
with three daughters, and
I want them to also memorize the Quran. And it's true, subhanAllah,
like in general, the drive amongst young girls to memorize Quran is
less because they they don't get the same encouragement because
they're not told you could lead the prayer you can recite in front
of people you can and they don't see the examples of anyone else
doing so so they don't get that same drive. So for there to be a
community of women that they can connect to that are reciting
Quran, that's going to be a huge motivation for them, for sure.
No doubt about it. I mean, what I saw this whole time and what
really matters,
I'll say the most is passion. That's all I'm hearing from you,
is passion. You're, you're passionate about this. You know,
you're, you know, some people say passion. You have to be
borderline. What is it? Obsessed through that level of obsession?
Because you see a problem, and it is a problem, you know, when it
comes to cultural nuances regarding the female in general,
and then the females voice in the Quran, we know the Messiah, and
what people say about this, or what certain cultural nuances can
impose upon other cultures, not taking into consideration where
people came from and where they're trying to go. I mean, they're
trying to read Allah's word Karima, salamuha. There's no Hata
in it. I mean, this is tanzil and Beni Ademi rabala. Means this is
all from Allah, subhana taala. And for someone to initiate the
effort, to try to memorize, to just read, we should never, never
belittle that. We shouldn't, you know, we should never delay that,
or ever hold someone back from making that effort, whether
they're eight or 80. You know, because anyone can make a change.
And mashallah, hats off to you. And I'm, I'm really, really happy
that you're passionate about this, because that's what, that's what I
think people are seeing now, people that have known you before,
they see that immediately, mashallah may also make this
endeavor soon that is blessed
inshallah means of so much
that's
true what you said about, you know, the women and the Quran,
because, You know, I have my wife. She me writes the Quran as well.
She's from Edina, and memorizing the Quran. And being around Sheik,
like, when I first met her, was like, okay, She memorized the
Quran like, two years at the age of, like, 12. So then she had a
sheha from Sudan and a sheha from Egypt, and a sheha from Maurya.
And then this is the first time I was really exposed, because I
converted to Islam as well. So the first time I was exposed to just
like mashallah, Tabata kala there's a plethora of sisters,
girls, you know, females that memorize the Quran, like you said,
Quran competitions. And you just see the zeal and the examples that
set for the young girls when they see people, when women, women and.
Win Quran competitions. It creates a whole different feel and
experience, absolutely different outlook shift. It's an absolute
cultural shift. Subhanallah, I think that's so, you know, even
when you were talking about your wife and Masha Allah, may Allah
bless her and protect her whole family. And then she has like
this, she, I mean, like, even like being able to find a she being
able to, if your shed doesn't have time being able to find another
one, it's so difficult sometimes. But when you're able to create a
culture where it's like, oh yeah, I know all these women, and all
these women have done it, and I want to be like them, like we talk
about so many times. You know, the the things that are wrong with the
woman of the ummah. Unfortunately, we hear so much of that, and so
much of the guilt and the blame and the shame. They're supposed to
be doing all these things, and they're a these things, and
they're obsessed with the dunya and Okay, well, what is their
example? What are we doing? What are we doing to solve the problem
that we you think is a problem? Okay, do something about it. We
close the door of mentorship. We close the door of access, and then
we say that they're the ones with the problem. And then, at the same
time, your most important role as a mother, you need to raise the
next generation, but they're struggling with access in the
first place. So Subhanallah, I mean, what a gift that your wife
had, that that that that that environment, that environment to
nurture, nurture her growth as a 12 year old. Masha, Allah, may
Allah, may Allah allow ya clean to be that for all of the the young
and the elder and everybody of this text,
I want to remind everyone in the chat, you know, we do have a
portion of our session today of questions and answers, so if you
have questions you'd like to for us to ask us. Madia, please put it
in the chat. Inshallah, we'll hopefully, you know, we can't get
to everyone's questions, but hopefully we can choose your
question Inshallah, be able to
to flag that for usadhya Mariam to answer later on. So put your
questions inshallah in the chat. We are monitoring it via so when
did you feel when did you decide to then pursue knowledge and go
down that path? When I was in high school, and I was reading the
Quran, and I was like, I want to know this, and I want to know
Arabic, and I want to memorize this book. And at that time, may
Allah bless my parents. They were all very, always very supportive.
And especially, they were like, you know, we need women to be in
the space. And so hamdullah, even at that age, they were like, so
supportive of, what, what do we need to do to support you in this
path, especially because our community needs more women. And at
that time, there was a like a college in the US that was an
Islamic college, but shut down, because after September 11, they
were shutting a lot of things down. So Subhan, a lot I went into
college, and every year I was looking for a way to go study
Arabic. And this is pre online learning. This is pre like
institutes online so it was really hard to find ways to learn. I was
trying so hard to study with women locally, but I could only find one
sister who would teach me Arabic once a week, and only for 30
minutes, and that was it. And I would go to these halakhas in
Arabic, and I would just stare at a woman speaking in Arabic, and
just try to, like osmosis, learn Arabic. And it didn't work. So
alhamdulillah, eventually, I was so blessed to go to Egypt the day
after I graduated from college, and Alhamdulillah, that's when my
formal, I mean, I was taking classes here, And Alhamdulillah,
I'm studying here, but my formal like
doors of opening Arabic, and the studies of Arabic started come to
that.
So that's, that's beautiful. As soon as you said, uh, you know,
I'm sorry, but when you're mentioning these, it's very
similar to my story as well. Like, that's what made me want to
memorize the Quran as well. And I remember with Subhanallah when I
first saw
and
the brother was a convert, and he spoke Arabic and English. And I
was like, Man, I want that. I don't know. I'll do what it takes.
Like I just embraced Islam. And then I sat with my chick from from
Kerala, India, and he, he was, you know, teaching me to read and
things of this nature. And then he used to shut, he used to shut the
book every day. And she said, One day you will memorize the Quran,
and you will lead people. And I'm saying they're
like,
mine, I'm like 20, but yeah, no, masha Allah, that that was the
what made me want to just really memorize the Quran and just tell
my mom about it. I just really want to just tell her about it,
about Islam via the Quran. So when you mentioned that, it just
sparked
something. Sorry about that. May Allah, bless you, bless your
Mother, bless your Sheik. Oh,
so I think you know you wanted to reflect on a Aya inshallah. Today,
we ask all of our guests to reflect on ay or hadith of their
choosing inshallah. So something that will bring you know inshallah
benefit to everybody who's watching Vietnam. So if you can go
ahead and let us know you know what aa you'd like to speak about,
and what benefit all of us can gain inshallah. So I'll be
responsible.
And almost want to says in the Latino call Mr. Homo tetanus,
whatever you
generate. And the general translation of this is those who
say that our Lord is our
Lord is Allah, and they are firm on that the angels will descend
upon them. And they say, Do Not Fear and Do not
grieve, and glad tidings for Paradise, for the promise of
paradise. And the reason that I wanted to share this reflection
with you is because I think all of us, probably everybody in the
world, have this like thought at times about the shortness of this
life and how there is a time when it's going to end, and I think
there's a lot of fear that comes with that for many of us. And
panel law, my mom, when she was a kid, she said that she had a
friend whose sister had passed away from cancer, and she was a
little girl, and she was in the hospital room, and the parents had
been told that she only has a little bit of time left, and so
she was sitting with her, with her parents in the hospital room, and
she said that suddenly,
the little girl says to her parents, who just came in the
room, and her parents didn't see anyone, and she said they are the
most beautiful people I've ever seen, and they're holding the most
beautiful white dress I've ever seen in my life. And those are her
last words, and she passed away. And Subhan Allah, I've heard so
many stories like this, so many stories from someone who talks
about their grandparent or their or their loved one who's passing
away, and in that moment as they're passing away, they say
something about seeing a beautiful being in the room, and that's,
that's the very last thing that they say. And I remember, I was
talking to one of my teachers when I was sitting in Egypt, and I was
like, No, I'm so scared of that moment. I'm just so scared. And
she was like, you don't know what other people are seeing in that
moment. You don't know what's happening in that moment. They're
seeing angels. You're seeing the outside. They're seeing angels.
And whenever I reflect on this verse and on life in general, I
think about SubhanAllah. How many times has Allah shown us His signs
that he is with us and we may not exactly see what,
what is happening that, for example, we may be making dua
about something in particular. We don't see the answer to that in
the way that we're asking. But Allah protects us in another way,
and we see that protection or Allah we just in our heart, we
wish we're like, oh, I'm really craving those particular cookies.
And randomly, a friend of ours will drop it off and be like, Oh,
got these cookies for in your list, Pamela. I was just bathing
those. I'm sure all of us have some story like that, where Allah
answers the wishes of our hearts without us even making to offer
them, and he protects us sometimes by not answering exactly what
we're asking for. And it's a form of our it's a form of answering by
averting, averting, averting the pain and the punishment. And
subhanAllah, I think about how the angels have such a strong role in
our lives, such a central role in our lives, of protection, of a
means of barakah and and like mentioned that if the dua of one
angel, the dua of one angel, the I mean, of one angel, could be
enough for the whole Ummah, for everybody. And yeah, Allah has a
whole legion of angels making dua for us all of the time. So
whenever I think about this verse, I think about the comfort and the
hope whenever I'm feeling unstable, or whenever I'm feeling
nervous or anxious, or I just think about this ayah and Abu
Bakr, he asked some of the companions, or he asked some of
the Tabia, what do you think this verse means? And they were like,
Oh, these are the people who never commit sin. And he said, you've
given it a meaning it doesn't have. You've given it a meaning it
doesn't have. These are the people who believe in Allah, and they're
firm on that belief. And that gives me hope, because I know that
I could never deserve Allah's mercy. But how merciful is he
anyway? Because he is Al Rahman, he is a Rahman anyway, whether or
not I'm deserving of His mercy. And subhanAllah, there is a Hadith
that's related to this verse. It's actually the Prophet saw some
recited a different verse, but related to the angels. But it
just, it's, it's one of the most motivating,
one of the most motivating statements for me, and it's Sarah,
and he talks about a person who goes into Jannah and they're
looking around and they're in Paradise, and they're like, but
where's my grandpa? Where's where's this person? Where's this
person? Where's this person? And they're just at a loss because
their loved ones are not there. And it said to this person, you
worked that they didn't, they didn't do the same work that you
did. You worked for they didn't, they didn't do the same work. And
his response is, I worked for them, and I worked for me, I
worked for me, and I worked for them. I didn't just do it for me.
I did it for them and Allah because he doesn't want this, this
servant of his to feel sadness in paradise that he brings those
people who believed in Allah, but their actions didn't reflect that
belief. He brings them to that level to be with the servant And
subhanAllah for me every time I think about the hereafter and.
Them anything related to fear and anxiety. I just think about how
Allah is so merciful, and that he revealed an ayah that brings
together fear and sadness, the two things we feel about anyone, any
loved one, any of our own life, fear and sadness. And he and he
specifically had the angels tell us it's going to be Don't, don't
worry. Don't be sad. Don't, don't worry. Don't be said Your promise
paradise. Subhanallah, how He knows our souls. He created our
souls, and he gave us an ayah that would comfort our souls, not just
in the moment, but also through life, as we, as we, as we every
second approach that moment, subhanAllah, and that's a verse
that brings me so much comfort and steadfastness.
I us. It's such a powerful verse. And just like you said,
subhanAllah, there's so many people who have similar stories
where they talk about seeing something before they pass away,
or people were smiling Subhanallah, like a very
undeniable smile as they pass away, that they're seeing
something that we can't see. And I thought, you know, exactly like
you said, there's,
there's so much power in that, in that verse, for us to reflect on
and to think about.
You know, even as you were talking about how, you know, sometimes you
want something, and Allah brings it to you without you even asking
for it. And I'm thinking about say that Meriam Ali Salam in the
Quran, when you know, Zakariya enters upon her, and he sees she
has these fruits, and it's not even the time for these fruits for
her to have it. And she says in Allah gives to whoever, whomever
he wills, provides for whoever whomsoever He wills without any
account. And it's so true, Allah will give us, sometimes without us
even asking, gives us exactly what we want in the time that we want
it. And just like you said, sometimes we want things that are
not good for us, and we keep asking for it and it's not good
for us. Like Allah says, We had a shadri Dua, right? Like man is
praying, making dua for evil, thinking it's good, right? We
think it's a good thing, but it's really an evil thing. You know, Oh
Allah, let me marry this person. Or, Oh Allah, let me get this job
that. Let me get this. It's actually, you know, not a good
thing for you. And so, you know, just, it's beautiful, like you
mentioned, like Allah is giving us in that moment exactly what we
what we need on the deathbed. And the angels are coming, and
they're, they're telling us not to grieve and not to fear,
subhanAllah, the way you put it, actually just so beautiful. And I
think something for everybody's hearts to feel stronger just just
reflecting on that verse,
inshallah means SubhanAllah. Seeing some of the messages here,
some people mentioned they lost some loved ones. And you know,
it's going to be hard for them to cope, but it's interesting when
they send that message, you mentioned the I think it was in
other you know about the person that they didn't see their
relatives when they got there, but then their actions, Inshallah,
would be something that would be serve as an incentive or a means
for them to be with them. And subhanAllah, again, that verse is,
you know, subhanAllah, just to remind all of us. You know the
angel series as well. You know, it's just something that is, is
beyond our our scope. And that's what's so beautiful about Islam.
You know, the fact that you mentioned this verse is something
so profound that always remembering the angels, that we do
not see them, and that Subhanallah, they may appear in
certain forms, that we may see them indirectly. And we should
never give up hope on that, because it can happen at any time,
just as you mentioned with the great example of something that
you've desired, Allah knows al Alim knows you desire it.
Therefore with this Hikmah and Hakim, he brings it when you least
expect it, you know he provides for them when they don't even have
any sab they have no no thought they even didn't expect it. So
jazakila on that beautiful, beautiful verse and reflection, we
all need a Milas without bless you, mentioning that it was an
upper Yes, it was mentioned in the tafsir of the ayah, walaina amanu
what it's mentioned the popsula Salam mentioned this in relation
to the ayah. I'm so grateful that you specifically mentioned that it
was enough. I think that's actually so important that when we
talk about especially things related to the hereafter, that
it's very clear. Thank you, Chef me, Allah, bless you. I mean,
you know, actually, it reminds me of a similar or a different from
Al has he said, you know, subhanAllah sees humility. Is this
great scholar, but he was worried that Allah would not enter him
into Jannah. So he said, I I'm trying to make sure all my friends
and my companions are righteous people, so that if I end up in the
hellfire and they end up in Jannah, they will say, Oh, Allah,
where's our friend, and that they will bring him out of the Hellfire
into Jannah. And it's just had Allah beautiful statement, because
it shows us how important our friends are. And then the people
we spend our time around in our family, right? Just one person in
your family, really worshiping Allah might be able to bring us
forward into Paradise, and we might be able to save our kids,
just from our own practice and Allah being generous to us and
just for our practice to help save our children, we ask Allah to
protect them. I mean, we have a lot of.
Uh, questions, and I want to put some of them forward. Um, here's a
question from Layla. She's asking, when our iman is lower, when we
have doubts, how can we be sure that it's not Allah sealing our
hearts?
Subhan, Allah, when Ibrahim, when Prophet Abraham, peace be upon him
and the Quran. And it's mentioned that Allah says, Excuse me, Allah
SWT quotes him saying,
Robbie at any case, that to him, Mota, show me how you raise the
dead. And Allah SWT responds and says, Don't you believe, of
course, Allah knows the heart of Ibrahim, and Ibrahim, alai Salam
responds, and he's like Bella, of course, I of course, of course, I
believe. But just to have strength in my heart, just to let, let my
heart feel that like complete, you know, complete firmness. You know,
subhanAllah, it's very interesting, because
this is a prophet who's seen so many miracles in his life,
literally, like a fire has become cool. Um, he his, his elderly,
barren wife has a baby. There's like major miracles that Ibrahim
alaihi salam has seen, and yet Allah still chose to include this
statement. Allah didn't have to include this statement, but Allah
chose to include it, which I think for any of us who has doubts,
which, honestly, I think everyone does. I mean, you have doubts
sometimes, as a human being, then you go back and like No, for sure,
this is the truth. Then you maybe have a doubt. For sure, this is
the truth. That's the nature of being human and realizing that No,
Allah is the truth, and I believe in this. So first, the fact that
you have a doubt and you're worried about it, about it, is a
sign of your sincerity. It's a sign of the strength of your
belief. Your concern is a sign of the strength of your belief. And
what did Ibrahim alaihi salam do? What did Allah do? He answered him
by telling him what to do with the pieces of the bird and where to
put them and how Allah brings it back. So it's proof. Look for the
proof. After you have the doubt, ask the question and look for the
answer. It's so important not to let your doubt sit and fester and
then just let it fester because you're too embarrassed to ask
about it, because maybe you'll be shamed for asking about it. Ask
someone who's qualified and who knows who you are and who's not
going to dismiss your question about your question, and when your
iman is low, know that that's part of iman, the Prophet sallallahu,
alayhi wa sallam, taught us this Iman is going to go up and down.
We're not always going to be in the same position. And if you
didn't live in Mecca or Medina or in Meshal oksa, and you had the
opportunity to go, and it was Ramadan, and you were fasting, and
you were in a spiritual state, and your kids were not pulling on your
clothes as you were trying to pray, and your parents are not
asking for you to do something. You have nothing to do but
worship. Your Imaan would probably be in a different place. So is it
really you that's the problem, or is it? You're human and you have a
lot going on, and that's okay. You're still trying to worship a
lot, regardless, a woman told me that she's been praying for 40
years. She didn't miss a single prayer that was obligated upon
her, and she only felt emotional a few times in 40 years. She didn't
miss a prayer that she was obligated to pray. She felt
grounded in her prayer, but she didn't cry out of emotion in her
prayer, but she kept praying. And that's the point, even if you
don't have the spiritual high every time, you still maintain the
action. Because Allah told us in a hadith FTSE, that we come closer
to Allah through the obligation. That's how we come closer to him,
and then through the voluntary so he didn't say in any part of that
the Allah never tells us that. You know, if we weep for seven hours
straight, that's when he loves us, or if we were running through the
streets screaming with joy, I love God, that's when he loves us. No,
it's the action. Be sincere about the action and keep doing the
action. And maybe when you are terrified that Allah swt is
sealing your heart. One, it shows how much you love him, because
you're so afraid of that. And two, it also reflects a need to learn
about the names of Allah. Because if you know who Allah is, you
would never ask maybe Allah, lesam, Allah, God forbid, is ever
sealing your heart, because why? You know that you're trying and
you want to love Allah. And if Allah put in your heart the need
to know him, that's from him. That's a gift from him. So you
could read the names of Allah. Series reflecting on the names of
Allah by Jina and Youssef. It's a new book that she's recently
published Mashallah. It comes with a journal that you could write
your reflections in and listen to scholars talk about their
reflections. Reflecting on the names of Allah. Take one name of
allah a week. It's like a two minute read to read the chapter,
read the chapter, make dua to Allah by that name throughout the
week, and then go to the next chapter. And Inshallah, once
you're done with learning more about Allah and realizing that
it's okay to be human Inshallah, the next time you ask this
question, it'll just be, how can I keep my, maintain my Iman, when or
not even maintain my, maintain my action, despite the difficulty
that's going on in my life. And may Allah bless you and give you
the bad. May Allah fill your heart with his, with his will, fill your
life with his blessings and give light in the way that you.
See your life.
Beautiful answer.
We have a few other questions as well,
some of them related to memorizing the Quran.
So I'll just put this one up where sister Sahar is asking, Can you
please suggest your guide, some good resources to start with hips.
The biggest thing I would recommend is starting with a
teacher that's so important. When you find a teacher Inshallah, they
can help you have a specific schedule that they work with you,
and they often have a particular book that they want you to start
with before you start your memorization. So you could look at
Jannah Institute, or Swiss suhaibweb.com, or you could look
at robleta, gems of light. These are all institutes that also teach
Quran and Inshallah, you'll be able to find resources to start
with their
teachers also just filling it out there, tortilla, T, A, R, T, E, E,
l.com, isn't or it's an app. It's an excellent app where you can
just recite a portion of an ayah, and it will immediately figure out
where you are in the must have. So that's really helpful as a
resource. Another really cool app is Quran reflect. Quran reflect is
an is an app where, you know, scholars have reflection on Quran,
or people have reflection on Quran, so it can help you with the
contemplation part of your memorization. Quran.com has a lot
of positive resources. Masha, Allah and Inshallah, those were
all happy with your memorization. And if you're a woman, which I
think you are, Sahar, may Allah, bless you, then Inshallah, oh,
yeah, we'll be here by Ramadan to help you. Inshallah, somebody's
asking, Well, what was the book that she just mentioned? I think
it was the names of Allah by sister Jina and Yusuf, right? Yes,
right? J i n, a n uses beautiful, beautiful book Mashallah.
Here's a question. I'm a single mom and who just lost my dad, mom,
brother and sister, basically my whole family. Recently, I feel so
low, like Allah hates me, and this is bringing my Iman down. I can't
deal, of course, so much tests and trial that this person is going
through. What advice could you give her? Like it's not I wish
that I could ask you if I could give you a hug. I'm so sorry for
the loss of so many of your family members at one time. May a lot
enter them into the highest paradise. I can
only imagine your pain and your shock and your internal dialog,
and maybe at times you have regret or guilt or so much that you may
be feeling and sometimes you may be feeling numb. And I'm not going
to tell you anything of what you, quote, unquote, should be doing,
because there's no way I can understand your reality. I just
wish that I could be physically with you to let you know that
you're not alone. And I know that all of us are listening reading
this, and all of us are in pain knowing that you're you're a
single mom who's just lost some of the most important people to to
support you in that journey. Your child or your children have lost
their loved ones, I beg Allah to enter them into the highest
paradises martyrs and to make it easy easier. I don't I ask, I ask
Allah to replace the extreme pain and grief with ease and with
comfort. And I understand why you would say that you feel like Allah
hates you. I completely understand why you might say that? Because
sometimes when we are in a place of such devastation, we can't
understand and so we think that that must be the reason,
especially because some of the messaging about Allah is so
related to our action, and we may not feel like we've done enough
action, and so therefore it's a reaction to our lack of action.
But I just want you to think about the fact that some of the most
beloved people to Allah lost everyone. I just want you to
remember that that the Prophet Noah, Noah, peace be upon him. His
own Son rejected him, his own wife. I want you to remember how
the Prophet, peace be upon him lost every single person, every
single one of his children, except for Fatima, before he passed away,
peace be upon him and how he lost his wife, his his parents, his his
his grandfather, his uncle, sallAllahu, alayhi wasalam. None
of that was a reflection of Allah's.
None of that is a reflection of Allah not loving a person. So I
just want you to know that, of course, I understand why you may
feel this way, but it doesn't mean that Allah hates you, and I
understand why you might, you might feel like you can't even
approach him,
but remember that
even if they're in a Wisdom, we can understand the most pious and
those closest to Allah experience the exact same pain, and sometimes
he gave us their stories just so that we would know that he was
there for them, just like he is there for us.
So please know that you're not alone and that so many people so.
Much of this, Allah cares about you and is in pain because you're
in pain, and that Allah sees that, and he sees you and the pain that
you're in and that he is with you. And also it's so important to go
to therapy if you are able to maristan, M, A, R, i, s, t, a
n.com/resources,
has a list of resources for someone looking for therapy,
sometimes speaking with someone who is professionally trained, I
can help you just have a space of listening. Can be so helpful in
even your spiritual state. So may Allah bless you and give you the
the the the strength to be able to carry on and bless you with
support, to be able to support you as a single mom and bless your
family and let you come through this pain in a way where you feel
like you are held and almost mental, is with you.
Another question I thought was important. Sister gada is asking,
What advice would you give to someone who used to be very
religious but stopped praying and find it so difficult to come back?
The fact that this person wants to start praying again because
they're finding it difficult means that they've tried. The fact that
they are finding it difficult is a, is a, is a sign that they've
attempted even internally, it might even be an internal
discussion, and they haven't been able to do so. So the first thing
I would recommend is really look at why they stopped, because you
may hear that it's because they're committing sense, but maybe it's
because they've gone through trauma. So first, did it happen
when a person was going through trauma? Was there something that
they've experienced in their life that caused them to feel like they
cannot go back to praying or reading Quran without feeling
anxious or numb or or shaking? Was there a reason unrelated to simple
motivation, and if that was the case, again, therapy is so
important. Maristan.com/resources,
it's a resource that Sheikha Dr Rania began, and it's so important
to take this seriously for your spiritual health as well as your
mental and physical health, of course, of course, like
altogether. But secondly, if you maybe haven't gone through some
sort of trauma, this person hasn't gone through some sort of trauma,
but they just feel like they kind of, for whatever reason, drifted
away. All right, so what is, what something that they used to be
passionate about when it came to is that maybe for them, it wasn't
like, oh, they loved going to finish it every day. Or they loved
being able to make Salah every day. Or they love fasting every
day. But maybe they loved working with animals, and there is so much
information in Islam supporting working with animals and caring
for animals and caring for the creation of Allah, so maybe they
could start working in an animal shelter. But their intention is
that they want to worship God through this action. And so how do
we worship God, of course, in so many ways, with our intention, but
also actually through Salah. So you tie Salah to something that
you love. For the sake of God, you love working with animals. You
want to give your time to the animal shelter. And also it's the
hard time before you walk in for your shift. So you tie the whole
with something that you pray the whole, and you connect it to
something that you love. And that way you build, you rebuild
feelings related to religion. Because sometimes we've simply had
experiences that haven't left us feeling that nostalgia that was
mentioned in the very beginning by shift by shift, right? So, sorry,
um. And so when you are in that moment where maybe you don't have
those feelings, but you need to create new ones. You build new
ones. How can you create new experiences with worship, so that,
just like a friend in the beginning, you might be kind of
awkward, you may not really understand each other, but the
more you hang out, but you know each other, and the more you miss
them. And then you start to long for them. And then even if you
don't long for them, you just want to make sure you stay connected
with them. And so you get through that patch, but then you miss them
again, and then you go back again. And you're still connected. You're
still you're still connected every day, but there are times you
really want to connect with them, and you have the you already feel
like you have the channel to do so because you've been consistent
with your relationship, with that, with with a friend. So in the same
way, how do you build a relationship with worship? You
start by recognizing it might be awkward at first, but we're going
to build these new experiences together in a way that we both
that you cherish, that you cherish and that you know that Allah loves
every single action that you do for his sakes.
Even be talking in front of both of you, we have no idea. Every
time someone asks a question, I'm like, they're not even answer, but
I feel like I'm with me, saying, What do you think? What do you
think? No, what do you think? No. So then that's why it's free
everybody. I'm like, super embarrassed to talk in front of
you, like.
You, I feel like we've given you, like, a lot of tough questions
too.
What's the
you tell us? Yeah,
you know, this question actually, like it. It's kind of hit a nerve
with me a little bit too, because, like, we've seen this a few times.
I'm sure all of us have seen this in our in our daily lives, like
people we know, who used to be, you know, very practicing, and
then maybe made other decisions for whatever reason. Like you
said, maybe there's trauma, maybe there's, you know, really bad
circumstances in their life, whatever it is, they made
different decisions, and now they kind of want to come back, but
they don't know how. And sometimes it's, I don't want to say ego, but
because everybody's different, to be honest. But sometimes it's
like, I used to be that now I'm no longer praying, no longer fasting,
no longer doing this. And it's almost like, I
don't know. It's like somebody had, like, a really important job,
and now they lost that job, and it's like, I can't start in this
company all over again from the from the entry level, like,
literally, that's a conversation I had with someone.
And, you know, it's important to to just, you know, realize in the
end of the day Allah, that the Ibadah that comes from someone
with sincerity is more important than, you know, the how impressive
it is to human beings, right? So, the person used to be able to pray
and recite Jos and Jos of Quran, you know, maybe Allah didn't
accept that at all, because there was a lot of showing off in their
heart, right? And then now you've, you've gone away from Islam for 20
years, and now you're trying to come back, and maybe you can't
recite, you know, hold just anymore. Maybe you can only recite
a few verses, but that might be more accepted in Allah than what
you were doing before, because now you're coming with humility. Now
you're coming with sincerity, whereas before you weren't, you
weren't bringing that even though you were, quote, unquote,
practicing just something to think about. You know, and I know,
everybody's path is different. Everybody's situations might be
different. But just wanted to throw that out there.
Another good question here. Like I said, people are asking really
tough questions. Today, we're grilling you a little bit. What
advice would you give someone who keeps on going back to a certain
sin and always feels so bad because they have disobeyed a lot
but they forget to get tempted again? I feel like Chef Abdullah
hasn't even an answer yet. So, no, no, please, please, please. No,
ladies,
first.
So the first thing is recognizing what Allah says about this
himself, like he, over and over, tells us that he don't, don't
despair in the Mercy of Allah. Don't despair in the Mercy of
Allah that You know, and Hadith hutzi that even if our sins were
to reach the you know, the the even if our sins were to reach the
heavens, and we don't commit partners with Allah, that he'd
forgive us, and he wouldn't mind that no matter how many times we
make the same mistake and we feel bad about it, we go back and we
ask for forgiveness, then we we make the mistake again, and it's
not because we are we're not playing a game. We're not like,
Oh, I'm gonna ask for goodness and just do it again. No, like we mess
up. We're human. Okay. So one recognize that Allah loves our
repentance, that if we didn't sin, he would replace us and replace us
with the people who did sin and ask for forgiveness. So first of
all, he loves to hear your voice. He loves when you go back to him,
and sometimes when we keep committing the same mistake, we
may feel like, oh my god, like pan Allah, he's probably so tired of
hearing it from me. He's probably so tired of seeing me do the same
thing. Why would he accept me? And I want you to remember, panel,
there's a companion named Abdullah, but the Prophet
sallallahu alayhi wasallam loved the Prophet sallallahu alayhi was
telling this, this Abdullah will be Allahu Akbar. He would be
publicly punished because of the amount that he would drink. He
would keep drinking and keeping punished for it. And then the
companion started cursing him. And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa
sallam is the one who stopped them. And do you know what he did?
The Prophet sallallahu alayhi salam testified for this man's
love for Allah and His Messenger, someone who consistently drank.
He's been punished for drinking, and the Prophet sallallahu, alayhi
wasallam is attesting for the love that this person has for Allah and
His messenger. So first of all, maybe your love for Allah and His
Messenger is so strong, but you keep going back to him, and that's
a sign of your love. But you just need help. You have a trigger that
is causing you to keep going back to sin. What is that trigger? Is
it an addiction? Because saying a silk fiddle 100 times a day should
be something that we do also, but additionally, it's not going to,
let's not gonna, it's not gonna be the cold turkey that gets a person
off of, off of a particular addictive sin. So say 100 times,
yes. But also, work with a professional if you have an
addiction, make sure that you seek professional support. That's one
thing. The second thing is, maybe it's not something that is an
addiction, but it's something that you know isn't appropriate, and
there is a certain environment that it's created in, like maybe
you know if you if you are in a particular area, or if you.
Talk to a particular person or something, it's going to trigger
you to go back to that thing. So you need to not stop at cold
turkey. You need to give yourself an alternative. I'm going to give
you a nonsense example. What if I have an obsession with ice cream?
I happen to have one. I really do. So let's say I want to have ice
cream for breakfast, lunch and dinner, which I do, but I know
that's not going to be okay for my body. I can't just say I'm not
going to eat ice cream. What else am I going to eat? I need to
replace it with something that I also enjoy, maybe not as much as
ice cream, but I enjoy it. So what are you going to replace it with
that you can actually feel like you have this energy going towards
something else and recognize that could be really so much. Sports
are worship. Brushing your teeth is worship. Hanging out with your
friends can be worship. It's about your intention and the action that
you're doing, of course. So what would you replace it with? Going
backwards, making sure that you see a professional if you need
help. And also, obviously, in the example I gave, ice cream isn't
haram. So I mean in general. But I said in general. Why did I say
that? I think the point of what I'm trying to say is that if you
were to also encourage yourself with some sweet
associations, it could be helpful. And I am not talking about you
should reward yourself every time you do something. But for example,
maybe you can have you know when you do worship, you know you make
it a sweet experience. You light candles or you you have some some
coffee you enjoy beforehand. You make worship sweet so that when
you think about not wanting to go back, or thinking about the scent,
you have something so much greater, internally and
physiologically, that your body wants to do, so that even if your
your reasoning isn't enough,
and your illogical, illogical part of you will still go towards it,
because you've built those connections,
I guess, and they could probably, you know, to reward themselves,
Maybe have some sugar free ice cream. Is that, ultimately,
it's okay to have sugar sugared ice creams. I mean, if you're
gonna have ice cream, might as well just go for it, like why? Why
not?
In moderation,
no keto ice cream.
Yes.
I keep saying, like, Okay, this is the last question. You know, we've
taken a lot and we've asked a lot of you, but then somebody else
asked a good
question. I mean,
so this question says, What advice would you give someone who wants
to learn more about Islam and the Quran in depth, but don't know
where to start, maybe both of you can take this question. Inshallah,
Abdullah, this is 100% where you should, we should please plug in.
No, no, I'll go after you. Inshallah, I, I would say, I would
say, look up lectures by Sheik Abdullah, guru. That's what I was,
literally the advice I would give. So please, please go ahead.
He has a great series on basics of a Salam. It's on ya clean
Institute website. And you know, it's all the basics that you want
to learn about the DNA. He does a great job, Michelle on that video
series. He's not going to praise himself, so we have to do it for
him.
But are there other resources by someone who is wants to learn
more, wants to learn more, especially about the Quran as
well, in depth,
for me, honestly, I've the one thing that I would suggest is
actually reading a translation of the Quran, and I would suggest
starting with certain chapters. So for example, I would suggest
starting with chapter 19, the chapter on Virgin Mary, and also
named after her, which is why I always recommend that. But I would
always recommend starting with chapters like chapter 12, chapter
19, chapter 13, chapter 14. There are certain chapters that I think
people when they open them and go through, through it as kind of
like
it's I feel like it kind of may be
relatable depending on the person I'm speaking with. So sometimes I
also just give that, that guidance based on whom I'm actually
speaking with. But that's really where I would start. But after
that, the the sources that I, the resources that I, that I give, are
places like Hilton, or are places that focus on, convert care.
And unfortunately, none of them are coming to my head at the
moment. But yes, please fill in, please. A million times. I mean,
like you said, mashallah, like how you mentioned certain chapters
that deal with the reality of people, or whatever they're
facing, or they, you know, what they've had or currently facing
previously. I'll never forget when I was in Jeddah,
one of my old mentor, shebrahim, in Jannah, mashaAllah, he, he
looked at me and he said, re.
Sort of to nur read the chapter of Noor everything's going on in
America. If you're going to go back and give dawah, make sure you
read the chapter of North and you look dead in my face. And I was
like, I've read it. Ah. Now, like just so many I can for people that
think Islam is not practical or doesn't address issues, you know,
the the way that Allah SWT addresses these issues and how to
how to deal with them, is so profound. And like you said, USADA
Meriam really having an USA someone that you can go to and
seek knowledge from, whether it's a coach or a mentor, you know,
someone that you can sit with and talk with and ask questions with.
Inshallah, I think that's, I think that's profound as well. And as
far as you mentioned with the Quran again, you know, just
reading and pondering over the verses and taking your time, it's
not, it's not a race, you know, it's really about just
understanding what the book of Allah is articulating, what he's
saying, and asking people of knowledge if you don't know. And
just that's the process. That's the process of Taliban and of
seeking knowledge. Inshallah will bless you, and you won't even
realize it until someone tells you how far you've gone, you know. So
that's the advice that I would give. Yes, that's let me give a
specific resource on your advice on mentorship. So Robo Club, which
was founded by a scholar who's a convert. Her name is shefa, Doctor
Tamara Gray, R, A, B, A, T, a.org, and she has not just an institute
which focuses on specifically, if this person is asking about a
woman asking so this is a more like a woman, woman specific
resource. But they have, you know, they have a group specifically
addressing convert care that is a that's like an entire group of
support, supporting you in the journey, supporting you in the
process. And she also wrote a book, which is called Project
Lena. Project Lena, which is she, she, she wrote with also Zed and
ajia maxville Maxfield. And they have, they have a whole program
for someone who is considering Islam or who's converted to Islam,
about how to really process Islam in their lives and in their
families. So those are, those are a couple of resources that are
helpful because they're very practical. They're written by
converts, and also having a system in place, like Sheik Abdullah
mentioned, like, yes, it is so helpful to have a teacher, but
where exactly does someone find a teacher? Sometimes online. Hamza,
I know that we have this resource. Rebels, a great one.
So so we have questions for you. Inshallah, before we wrap up, I
know we're ready well over the hour mark, so we've taken a lot of
your time, Alhamdulillah, but you know, I want to ask you. And you
know, as Muslims, of course, we don't live in the realm of regret.
The Prophet salallahu Salim said to us, you know, don't say no. And
if only I did this, if only I did that, because this is a door of
shaytan. But at the same time, we can reflect over the past to get
wisdom and lessons and muhasa, but take ourselves to account and give
advice to our brothers and sisters in Islam. So if you can go back in
time, you know what advice would you give your younger self
that Allah made you exactly like you because that's how he wanted
you to be, and that your goal or your your path needs to be. How
can you most align what he has how he has created you to be in a way
that he loves the most. And how can you use those qualities in a
way that Allah would be pleased with and that would be beneficial
to the Ummah, and that you don't need to constantly look for
legitimacy outside of
outside of someone who knows what your reality is. And the reason I
say all of that is, one, because as a woman, and the messages I
received, they just destroyed me. And two, because I think a lot of
times, I've spoken with so many women in the community who are
activists or who are leaders and who are scholars, even, and
they've had times where they just feel like they've struggled with
some of the messaging that they've heard or that they've experienced
personally, and that our ultimate goal is with Allah to Panama
taala, and that our effort is for the OMA for his sake. And so we
don't need, you know, we don't need a particular
we don't need a stamp of approval from Hollywood. We don't need a
stamp of approval from, you know, some sort of, you know, political
organization. We don't need a stamp of approval from someone
else. We just need a stamp of approval from Allah. Well, I don't
say that. We say we want all approval. So when we, when we seek
that, and we search for that, we when we go towards that, that that
his, his, he, as the end is the end is the ultimate goal, is the
only one who actually matters. And so all the other noise, and even
sometimes that noise might come from within the Muslim community,
who can sometimes be very painfully harsh, we just need to
realize that maybe we don't need to listen to them. We can just
focus on our goals and keep going. For the sake of Allah, and I would
also give her a really good.
That actually, that was beautiful advice. And I think so so much of
us, so many of us need that exactly is we can get, you know,
drawn into so many distractions, and like you said, the approval of
Allah, the acceptance of Allah, that's, that's the important
thing, and everything else is, you know, sometimes drags us into the
wrong direction.
Sheik, did you want to add anything to that? No, no. Masha,
that was very profound. Mashallah, I mean, really just staying
focused and understanding your purpose of life, you know, the
macro purpose of worshiping Allah and being sincere to him, but
looking at what you have and being content with that. That sometimes
can be a struggle, but the fact mechanic right at your struggle is
that is something that Allah swt is gracious for. So just always
taking that step back and looking at what you have and what people
do not have, what you may have, and being thankful for that. So
Subhanallah, that's that's a beautiful thing.
Before we conclude, there's another comment here from our week
one guest, Sheik.
I just want to put it up there.
Mashallah, you know, he's, he's great, and he supported us by
being our first guest. And, you know, launching this series that
you know we're coming every Wednesday, Alhamdulillah, live on
YouTube. And you just put this funny comment here.
You know saying mashaAllah, tadakala, Sister Mariam is making
moves that are foundational for our English speaking Ummah May
Allah protect your home family, dawah from Hasid and corruption.
Amin is a longer, I don't know if it shows up on the screen, but
I'll just read out the rest of it. He says, The
best of you are those who learn the Quran and teach it. Muhammad,
sallAllahu, alayhi wa sallam,
as the prophet Salim, said, May Allah make her and all of us from
amongst them. And then he asked Shaykh daladuru, do you lift bro?
Yes,
you know, I just had Allah. One thing we didn't get to talk about
him as your taekwondo Of course, we're going to talk about Sheik
Abdullah and his lifting, and I'm the only one who's lacking in the
physical sports area.
But, you know, we never got a chance to talk about it. Maybe we
just want to address it quick. How did you become the taekwondo
master? Well, of course, I really appreciate that was, I'm so beyond
honored. I literally had, like a whole moment a minute ago,
subhanAllah, may Allah, bless you. I grew up listening to Shaykh
Yahya. I mean, subhanAllah, you have no idea this. Just like major
shock to have a scholar who you grew up listening to say my name.
Oh, my God, may Allah, bless you. Shay I mean to your Allah, mean
for every single one of us, Yahoo, but I mean Allah, Amin, you said,
I have to tell you my Quran teachers. You have my who's
literally the best Quran teacher in the world. Lesson, he knows the
Quran so well, like he never even needs to look at the must have. He
just, he just, like, you know, when he looks, when he looks at
the most happy, it's only because he's helping someone understand
how to read it, like he will be have the must have open and he's
reciting from shul, from that Ida, but social Baqarah is open. And I
remember one of the first times I went, I studied with him. He was
like the way he said
that hadith. Well, I love just like so passionate. Every time I
hear that hadith, I remember chef Mohib. So I had to mention, please
pray for my teacher, Chef Mohib, and his family. And I lost my
child. Bless him and raise his ranks and every single one, every
single person that he lives, I mean. And as for Taekwondo, so my
whole family, our taekwondo martial artist. My mom has a
second degree black one taekwondo. So it is my aunt and my uncle. And
uncle has, like a ninth degree. My other uncle has blackout. My
brother has blackout. We are just a family of martial artists. So I
started when I was very young, and when I started wearing hijab, you
know, martial arts, it really depends on the type. I did Take
one dough, but it depends on the type. It can become a very
physical, a physical sport. And so when I started wearing hijab, I
stopped training in a in a in a studio or in a dojo type place. I
started training with my family. I had the extreme fortune of being
surrounded by martial artists, so we were able to train together,
Alhamdulillah. But that's not a reality for literally everybody
else. And I don't, I wish I could say that I know this resource that
will work for other women who want to learn more, and you know how
to, like, have, like physical wrestling and but I don't,
unfortunately, know that here that might exist. And I just don't know
about it. I have the extreme blessing from my family, and so
please pray for all of my family. And I mean, Allah, that's
beautiful, because it just shows like how your family gave you this
great support system. And Alhamdulillah, you've been able to
achieve so much. May Allah Azza, bless you and bless your family, I
mean, and allow all of our families to provide, you know,
great support for our children and for the children of our community.
I mean,
I know asking for an hour of you know, any of the guests we've had
their time is always very difficult, but Alhamdulillah,
we're so happy that you chose spend an hour with us or now.
Actually,
we really appreciate it, and I hope. Inshallah, it was beneficial
for everyone who was watching. Again, a message everyone, there
is a link in the description if you want to give us feedback,
guests you want, want us to have on in the future, questions you'd
like us to cover in the future. You know, just put in that link.
Inshallah, we're back next week, Wednesday, 7pm Eastern Time, live
on, on yacht Institute, YouTube and Facebook. Inshallah, we'd hope
Inshallah, everybody's able to join us and come back to see our
next guest. I'm blanking a little bit about who our next guest is. I
think it's Sheik. It's
either chef Naveed Aziz or Dr or William and Jim, one of the two of
them, we're going to have fun next week Inshallah, and the other one
will be the week after. So we'll get to see all of them inshallah.
We hope all of you will be able to join us then. And sheikhan,
anything else to add? Anything else you'd like to add? Oh, wait.
Oh, this is just a shameless plug again, uh. Claudia app is coming
out. The women put it on reciters app Inshallah, by this Ramadan,
and you can sign up inshallah. It will be a free app through the
link in my bio on Instagram at the maryamir, P, H, E N, A R, Y, a m,
a m, I R.
So panickelham will be having a event itself has come into it. It
was such an honorable from seriously, such an honor to be
here. Thank you. Any salamarita.