Maryam Amir – Quran Recitation, Tafsir, Women’s Roles, Emotional Reg and Quran Ustada Kaltun Karani
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The speaker discusses various speakers, including Subhan reminded them of their desire to be a Muslim and their belief in Islam. They also talk about their experiences with Islam and how it has helped them become more qualified for a degree. The importance of learning the Quran and practicing the tafsir in their life is emphasized, along with the importance of practicing the tafsir and sharing experiences with others. The speaker also discusses the benefits of studying Islam and the desire for women to participate in academies. The "monster" culture is also discussed, along with the importance of men in their roles.
AI: Summary ©
Subhanallah, Subhanallah, Alhamdulillah, ILA, Allahu, Akbar,
subhanAllah, Alhamdulillah, wa la ilaha, illallah, Allahu, Akbar,
Allah, alaihi wa sallam, wakam, Allah, Salaman, Subhanallah,
Subhanallah, Subhanallah, Subhanallah, you will be handed
Subhan Allah, you Han. Subhan Allah Hani wala Kum salaam,
warahmatullahi wa salam authority. Thank you all so much for joining.
It's super excited, chala, to see him all this money so I can Sumaya
Allah SWT,
Masha, Allah, may Allah, bless you. That's awesome. Jala, you
prayed for us too, like a Salaman. We are going to be starting with a
set of kiltoon right now this Rahim,
how?
I'm
doing wonderful. How are you doing great? It's such a gift to have
you with us today. Thank you so much for making the time. Thank
you for making the time, for doing this, for the interviews, they
have been so beautiful. I've been enjoying all of them. And may
Allah, bless you for this beautiful platform you created.
Bless you for the platforms you created. Karani, Masha, Allah, she
has done so much. So just
to introduce her, before we get started with our conversation,
masha Allah, she is the founder of Academy, which is an institute
that teaches Quran and science and teacher of tafsir. She's lectured
with alum and with other patients that serve the Muslim community.
Mashala, she also has a bachelor's degree, not only from Ohio State,
but also from
and she's a student of the Quran, and she's a mom Masha Allah. And
with all of this, still is an author of a book, intentional
rising, which is incredible. You coach woman, you bring this power
to this. You know, woman already this, but you help amplify and we
need that
you've done so much work which
also had personal
like with what you're doing
a
little bit About
what, what has,
yeah, Hang on. Let me
some Subhanallah, Alhamdulillah.
Subhanallah, Alhamdulillah,
okay, I'm not sure if you can still see me, or if we froze for
everyone. Are you back? I'm here. Can you hear me now? Yes, okay,
Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah. None of it is something. I feel like
it's all from Allah. I sitting, I'm sitting here and thinking,
like, wait, I did all that. And she's like, it sounds nice, but it
all started
when Allah, like allowed me to learn and be guided. You know,
towards
him, I lived. I was born, I'm Somali. Originally, I was born and
raised in the United Arab Emirates.
I grew up in a home where, like my brothers. I had a lot of brothers
who were older than me, and they were just very passionate about
the deen. So I grew up in a home that was Muslim, with my religious
brothers, but somehow I felt distant from Islam, like you know
how my my brothers, they were nice and loving, but they were also
young, and so the way they went about like feeling it was too
passionate,
and I just wanted nothing to do with it. So when I was 23 years
old, I was a student at Ohio State, and my friends literally
forced me to take my first Alma class. It was light of guidance.
Michelle PADI, um, and I tried my best to get out of it. I said, I'm
not going. I said, I have no money. I said, I'm going to take
you guys and I'm just going to leave. And one of them said, I
will never I will forgive you for what you did, because she was kind
of upset with me. Another one said, You have no choice but to do
this.
And then the third one looked at me, and she said, I'm paying for
the class, so you're going
and I was so upset. So I sat there, and this was a class, and
Wallahi, it felt like he was speaking a foreign language. Never
did I hear about Allah's compassion and mercy, and La ilaha
illallah is the key to Jannah. And I remember, like, shifting the way
I was sitting at some point and leaning in, because he got my
curiosity. He got me to think. He got me to say, Wait, like this is
my Deen, you know. And I never knew this. And I remember Mariam,
I asked that question, because he was talking about saying, La ilaha
illallah is the key to Jannah. And I grew up with the belief that if
you don't pray five times a day, you're going to hellfire. And
there was no ifs and no buts like Tariq Salat. So I raised my hand
and asked that question, and he said, you missed last weekend. We
discussed this, go back to the, you know, resources. And I was
like, Wait, like, this belief was something is wrong with that.
Like, that's not true. And for me,
it was really painful, because I could never pray, you know, I
would, like, there would be a moment. I remember one time I
almost got into an accident. My car was rotating in the highway,
and I was like, I'm going to start praying. So I started praying the
next day, but I could never keep up. Even in Ramadan, I would fast
and I could not pray.
And so my thinking was, you're going to hellfire, you're going to
hellfire, you're going to hellfire. And he undid that,
And subhanAllah, I started praying. And I I never missed a
prayer intentionally after that day.
And I never, and the thing is, like, I never said, Okay, I'm
going to start praying. It just happened from Allah, like, two
weeks into it, I remember thinking, like, wait, you never
you did not miss Allah. So I created like, a punishment for
myself. That's all I knew. Like, punish, you know, like, if I miss
a prayer, I'm going to pay $5 donation. It just never, I never
had to. I never had to because I was so scared I'm going to go back
to the way that I've always known myself to be. And it didn't
happen. Alhamdulillah, and that thinking of I felt like the class,
and this is what I love about studying Islam, is that there is a
lot of things when we grew up in a home that is Muslim, or the
culture that is Muslim, there is things that are not correct, that
we actually believe, and it sort of damages the relationship you
have with Allah, subhana wa taala. You know, you're thinking like
you're not thinking about Allah's kind and merciful, and He will
forgive you, and he's already blessed you. You're thinking he's
going to punish me. He's so angry with me, I'm so messed up, right,
right? How does that serve our relationship with Allah? Yes, you
know.
So that's where it started. I'd become consumed like that was my
first class, and I think in the next five or six years, I had
taken all the classes required to graduate.
I would travel everywhere I went. I lived in Columbus, I would go to
Michigan, I would go to Windsor, I would go to Toronto, I would go to
Virginia, Maryland, and Virginia, I'd go Chicago, Texas. I've gone
everywhere to take a class,
and it really like changed me from the inside. I remember how I felt
taking every class and what I've gained from it, and what how it
changed me as a person. And that was a gift from Allah. Subhanaw,
taala, Allah, nothing that I ever set to say like, oh, I'm going to
start practicing. I'm going to start taking this path to Allah.
It was just this desire to want to know more and practice it that
just
continued me until this day, you know, and I ask Allah subhanaw
taala that he continued this, you know, that that guidance is a gift
from him, and I appreciate it so much. Yes, subhanAllah, and so
you went on a path for your
relationship with Allah and whatever
words.
So, okay, so I actually, like, I remember Sheik Yasir Khadi, when
he ended, like, the last thing he told us in that class was take the
exam, because the exam is followed, you know. And he said,
the real exam is when you stand in front of Allah and you have to
talk to Allah.
Never did I think about that, never. And I was like, whoa. Like,
this is real, and ever since that feeling is with me, but I also
continue to take exams, not thinking, you know, like I'm gonna
get a degree with it. I just never thought about it. But one thing
that did help,
I had a friend who was Masha Allah, like, younger than me, but
so much wiser than me. And.
He, like, basically volunteered me to do a Halakha Adam, as Jen I did
one day, and I ran away because I felt like I'm not qualified for
this. I can't young girls, but I felt like I can't, I can't answer
their questions. I need to know. So after maybe a couple of years,
there was another class that I took that torch bearers, and it
was all about, like, what are you doing to service, you know? And I
remember making that intention, like, I'm just going to do my
best. I love this. I'm going to review my classes by teaching a
masjid. And Alhamdulillah, the Masjid was like, they, they, they
wanted me to do it. So I started a weekly youth halakah,
and that was maybe in 2008
Okay, or 2009 and ever since, I have been doing halakas, or some
sort of teaching, maybe the pandemic has kind of, you know,
it's gone up and down, but I've been teaching somehow, somewhere,
like, yeah, so that, I think, solidified, because, you know,
when you Study, you receive it's for you. You forget a lot of it,
right? You forget a lot of it, right? But when you're teaching,
you go back, you review, you read, In that process, you're like so
you're you go through your own spiritual experience, yeah, right.
And then you come back and you teach it, and through the
questions and the discussion, you learn more.
And so the whole teaching was like, even when I started hikma
Academy, it was I started hikma Academy in 2014
I'd become a mom in 2013
and I realized that it used to take me about 810, hours to
prepare for the two hour Halakha that I used to do. And with
working and having a child, I was losing my mind, you can imagine,
right?
I could not, I could not do it. So I remember making dua that Allah
let me continue to teach without it being so like anxiety inducing
and stressful. And I was just an anxious mom with my first child.
You know, I asked Allah to let me do it in a way that would be easy
and
and so after a little bit, I quit my job. I just focused on hekma
Academy, and it was the best gift from Allah. Again, Allah,
it was the best thing of i Words are not enough for light to
describe how Allah would just that intention, that dua he opened
doors that were bigger than me. Truly, they were bigger than me. I
never thought
I would have like I was thinking, I'm going to teach youth. I'm
going to teach young girls, teenagers, you know. And then a
friend of mine asked me who was an adult. She like Somalis. We have
this culture. We love the Quran, and we memorize the Quran from a
young age. So my friend had memorized the Quran from a young
age, right? But like, we don't. Arabic is not our first language.
So many, many people don't know the meaning of the Quran. So she
was like, why don't you teach us as well? And I was like, What am I
going to teach adults like you already know everything I know you
know. And it wasn't like it was,
it was beyond powerful. These women we still meet till this day,
like we had a halacha at seven o'clock this morning on Zoom, you
know. And I was telling them like, they have become my sisters. They
have become the woman that started this journey with me to like I was
saying. I wasn't saying, Hey, I'm so knowledgeable. Let me teach
you. It was I want to get like I want to understand the Quran at a
deeper level, and I want a community that will wants to do
that with me. Huh? So
beautiful. Alhamdulillah.
Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah.
So
how did you choose to focus in teaching tafsir first?
So okay, that's a good one. Because,
well, I There's so much I think that
I we have this love in the in our hearts for the Quran, right? And I
knew the Quran is the source of everything, and I knew the power
of the Quran in emotionally, regularly, the power of the
Quran I can like. So, yeah, that was a term I used this morning
because we were talking about our journey with the Quran. So I
remember
I would feel certain way. I'd listen to Quran, and then I feel
better.
I'm calm, I'm content. I remember I long time ago, I did a Huda for
some time. I didn't finish it a Huda like in Canada, and I was
having a really bad day at work, someone said something to me that
was so hurtful, so hurtful. I was crying. I was just miserable that
I came home, and then in the evening, my tafsir started, and it
was sayaku sahas,
and the way she reflected on that, ayah.
Ah, my, my, everything I felt was gone, huh? Oh, Allah, literally,
yeah, Allah is literally, like, telling us what we need so that we
don't like, we emotionally regulate ourselves. And I was
like, I want that. I want that in my life. And because I'd never
finished al Huda. I always wanted to recreate what I learned with
like so I didn't continue with Al Huda, because I knew the Arabic
like I was telling you. I was born and raised in an Arab country. I
like I went to, I didn't, I didn't speak English until I came to
America, you know. So the Arabic part was very easy, but not very
easy, but easier. But then the reflections that the the tafsir
part, what does it mean, and what does it mean for you in your life?
What does it mean for you today, and what you're experiencing
today? So the tips here, that I did was very like, we would do the
tips here, but then there would be opportunity to like, I'd give my
students four minutes of silence. Just process what happened. Write
down your thoughts, and let's talk about it. And then everybody would
bring what they're going through and what's happening for them. Can
you imagine, like, what we were learning in the discussions we
would have, like, it was just and some of these women were, like,
they were so knowledgeable in their own way. Like, like, my, I
remember one of them, she was, she was, she had a PhD in public
health. So the perspective she was bringing was something I know
nothing about, right, right? So, your, your,
it was just deep. It was just super deep that I'm like some of
the things you continue to process it till this day. You know,
absolutely, do you
mind for us in giving up
just that? Yeah, yeah. Okay, so,
okay, I'll listen to team, because when we were talking, I was
thinking
this was a powerful Sura that even today, when I think about it, I'm
like what Allah is telling us is really like. So panel is so
important and it, it was what inspired me to write intentionally
rising, okay,
Um, a Shay upon your rajim, bismila, hirah man
who
the feeling
them. You
could be buchaba doobie Dean. La, some more. Humveni,
beautiful.
Alhamdulillah, so and surati like so, the way I would do the tafsir,
it would be like, we would talk about the purpose of revelation
with makisura, and then we would talk about, like, the meaning the
word for word translation. And then what does it mean? So,
something that always came up, especially in Jose Amma, because I
asked them, just that I like repeated multiple times to
different classes.
Allah, subhanaw taala starts a surah by swearing, right? So he
swears by what teen was they tune? Watsini, wahad, al Balad. I mean,
there's four different oaths in the Surah, and an oath tells you
this is so important, what's coming after it is really
important, right? And not that Allah doesn't do it once or twice.
He does it four times in the Surah, right? So Allah swears by,
what team was a two and what Adil. I mean, the scholars talk about,
is he swearing by just like the olive, the fig and the city like?
Is he sparing by those specific things, or is there another
meaning? So even Abbas, he's talking about how Allah shantana
is swearing by the locations where those things are known for. So
when Allah speaks about Wati, he's speaking about the city where NUHA
salaam was at, was they too? Where Isa alaihi salam was at? Waturi,
Sini, Musa alaihi salam, and the message that was revealed to him
had a belac So Allah, subhanaw, Taala is bring and Ibrahim alaihi
salam, right? So the five prophets that we know to be ulila, you
know, the the ones with the strongest resolve, or the hardest
message, or the like they were, I guess the Allah reminds the
prophet to be patient, like they were, right. Um, Allah, Subhanahu,
taala, swearing by all that. Why? What is? What is this thing that
is so important that he wants us to bring us attention to in.
This is the purpose. Why Allah's feet? Why is Allah swearing so?
Allah is telling us, we have definitely, for sure, created the
human being in the best manner, in in the most straight way, with
like straight, right? Or like up, upright or upright, not just like
your standing, but upright in everything, right? So when I
thought about like, or, or you studied the tips here, like,
deeper, you see, like, what, what is a human being made on? You're a
spiritual being. You have a physical creation, you have
thoughts, you have intellect and you have an emotional experience,
right? So Allah is telling us that all of those are supposed to be
upright, right? Then he says that there are a group of people that
will be the lowest of the law. Why, if Allah had created me in
the most upright way, am I going to be at the lowest of the law,
right? And so Imam Al qurtubi, he says it is misguidance that makes
us the lowest of the law, right? It's that misguidance. It's that
shifting away from the fitrah that Allah, subhana wa taala, like that
innate nature that Allah has given us, we're shifting away from it,
and we're falling into things or where we are living in a way where
we're no longer upright,
and so Allah, Subhanahu Tala makes an exception. You know, who are
those people that are like, who have the exception, amen, except
for those who believe wa ani La Salle had they have done good.
They have a reward that will never end. And you know,
there's so much that can be said about that, but the one thing that
came to my mind today, if I am not upright, I'm a mother, I'm raising
children, right? If I don't keep fixing myself, what happens? We
talked today about generational trauma. Yes, very real. How do we
end generational trauma?
You know, if I'm not upright in my thinking, I'm not seeking
knowledge, I'm not changing the way I'm thinking, I'm not if I'm
not upright in the way I take care of my health and my body, and I'm
not upright in the way my connection with Allah subhanahu wa
and so I have behaviors that are not serving me, so I'm in the
like, I'm going to recreate that, right? So the part about ajuna,
can you imagine if I fixed myself? What is that reward that I could
get by all the people around me that I'm able to influence because
of me working on myself? Subhan Allah, Subhanahu, we see what I
mean, like ajruman Moon means, like a reward that is like, you
can't even count it, right, right, right. You can't even count it.
So,
so I guess
Allahu Akbar mean the last verse like, Isn't Allah the wisest of
the wise, right? So humanity is basically looking for wisdom.
Who is the source of wisdom,
Allah subhanahu wa and the Allah subhanaw taala has, out of his
like mercy, He has given us the Prophet sallam, so that we could
emulate him and look and learn from his life, right? So when you
think about the life of the prophet Sallallahu, alayhi wa
sallam, what do we learn? Like the way he ate, the way he slept, the
way he talked to people, the way he dealt in relationships with
people, the way he was so forgiving towards people, the way,
like everything about interactions with human beings, right? And then
the way he was connected with Allah, what kind of a schedule did
he have? If you look at that, you realize that this person who lives
according so let me, let me stop here. I
have a Master's in Counseling, school counseling, right? So,
trauma and something that I focus so much on because I was trying to
heal my own trauma. It was part of my courses. And then so there was
this book that I read by Nadine Burke Harris, and she's talking
about the deepest. It's the name of the book is the deepest. Well,
when she talked about trauma and what it does, and how it hurts,
and how like like the damage humanity is facing because of
trauma, and then she gives you six different things to heal. And I
was thinking, if we did all those, if we follow the singer, we're
doing those six things.
If we follow the singer, we're doing those things. What are they?
The things that she recommended. Um, I hope I remember them.
Um, meditation, or like, you're like doing doing, like, doing
meditation, you know, or yoga, my mindfulness, she calls it doing
talk therapy, you know, you could see where all those things like
talk therapy, like having somebody you talk to you, having a teacher,
having a mentor. What was the other thing? Like a physical,
physical like exercise.
And how important it was. Um, cartoon, come on, come on, come
on. I read this so many times.
There was other ones. I can't remember them, but there were six
of them, okay, and all of them, oh, nutrition mind, like mindful
eating or healthy eating. Like, what nutrition are you taking in?
How much does Allah talk to us about, like, fruits and vegetables
in the Quran, I guess
so to me, it's like Subhan Allah, like my wisdom, what I need to
live a good life and to take care of myself and the hurt that I
might have experienced. And so many of us have had traumatic
experiences, right? The false assalam has had traumatic
experiences. So how do you heal yourself? It's through Allah has
already given it to us in the Quran, and so that's why I
approach the Quran and tafsir, and I hope that my dream is to be able
to finish the whole Quran, but so far, solidified,
amazing start.
Yeah,
so when you talked about generational trauma and your own
background,
why did you choose to write a book
rising intent, intentionally.
Where do,
where did they to merge, right? Okay, so when we think about,
like,
there was a verse that I actually thought about
Allah subhanahu wa wants us to rise to see how, like, their
stairs, yeah, like, where it caught, what a call, right?
Like in get working on yourself. You're rising up to Allah subhanaw
taala. You're going up to Allah subhanaw taala, right? Whether it
is like when we die, I can't remember, there was
a verse that I was like, the verse, But basically, the book
took these parts that I'm telling you our spirituality. What does it
look like to have
a relationship with our like with Allah subhanho wa taala, where
we're rising to him. We're pleasing Him. We're going up to
him in the in a way that is pleasing to Allah and meaningful
for us, right? It takes into consideration there's like, the
different chapters of spirituality and then emotions. You know? We
don't, we don't realize how much our past experiences could hinder
us from having a relationship with Allah. Yes, you know, so if I were
like, something that I've we've talked a lot about coming from a
Somali community, we love the Quran. We have a very strong
relationship when it comes to, like, memorizing the Quran. Our
kids start duxi. You know, duxy is like the name we give it that it's
like the weekend school, our kids started, like, as young as three
or four or five years old, right? It's, it's beyond amazing. It's
the gift that Allah has given, like, to Somali people, right at
the same time around there, there are, there are,
there's this
hitting kids with the Quran like for so they can memorize the
Quran, the forceful way to go about it that has left many people
traumatized because of this way that you have been taught the
Quran, right? And I don't want to say to everyone, there have been
great teachers in Alhamdulillah, people who haven't had that
experience, or people who did have that experience, but because they
lived in a country where that was the norm, they didn't develop
negative association with the Quran because of it. But then the
reality is, there are people who had
a negative association with Dean because of that upbringing, right?
Um, there is also what. There was also like, I remember one day my
mom's neighbor, her kids had all memorized the Quran, so I was
standing at the elevator, waiting for the elevator, and then I see
her son, and I said, you know, oh, like, auntie, you've memorized the
Quran. Masha Allah, like, do you enjoy it? Do you enjoy reading it?
Because I'm thinking, I can't wait for the day that I memorize all of
it. I can just sit there and read it all right? And he was like,
What are you talking about? I don't understand a single word.
What do you mean? Enjoy it, you know. So I guess for me, when I
was writing this section in the book, I was thinking about the
spirituality Allah subhanho wa Taala meant for us,
you know, and what is getting people to reflect how the book is
actually a workbook, so it asks you questions, to get you to think
about your own personal relationship with ibadah, your own
personal relationship with the Quran and with Allah subhanahu wa.
Is it aligned with what Allah wants for us, or does it still
carry
the negative experiences we might have had when we were younger, or
the lack of guidance that we might have experienced so it allows you
to work on that and fix it and then pursue a path that is
meaningful for you. Does that make sense? Yes, you so, oh, sorry.
So the book, I guess you asked me about the book. The book is like,
so it takes every chapter is like, spirituality, emotions,
like contribution, or like, what your career and your what is it
that you're contributing into this world. There is a chapter about
worth and who you are, because that stands in the way before we
even try to work on our life. There is a section about your
health, your physical health and your fitness. There is a section
about
your relationships and a section about your finances, all of which
take into consideration what we talked about, what Allah wants for
us. Where are we at and where do we want to go?
So intentionally, rising has different sections. Have to do
yourself,
individual and yes, focus in counseling. And
really, I've heard a lot of
about emotion you've been discussing, yeah, how do you
how do you
going through depression or going through relationships, They have
trauma?
What is your response?
But
I'm yeah.
So Subhanallah,
to your My daughter is two years and three months old, and right
after I had her, I experienced, not right after I had her, like a
little bit after, I experienced postpartum depression, and it
actually went up to postpartum psychosis. It was a like, I got
really, really sick, and for a long, like, for a big part of it,
I had the depression, and it was,
it was the most difficult thing I've ever, like, dealt with
Alhamdulillah. Like I felt like Allah was teaching me, how would
you how are you going to work with people who are, who you maybe do.
I never experienced depression, but now, when someone talks to me
about depression, I get to feel I get it, you know, because there is
this level, there is this thing between mental health and
environmental depression, like someone could have a chemical or
hormonal imbalance that is causing them to be depressed, right? Um,
or it could be environmental. So the way you're thinking, the
lifestyle you're leading, the the the nutrients that you're giving
your body, you know, because mental health is is, is a reaction
of your body and your mind to what is happening. Right?
One second.
Take a break.
Okay? I'll remind you in three minutes, because you've been
sitting there for two minutes. Teacher gave him a break. I'm
sorry.
His teacher gave him a break, and he's telling me, help me count
five minutes. Okay, okay. But
your aunt.
But when you can,
then you take on your main role, and then,
yes, I love it. I love being able to multitask it.
That's it, right there.
And I love I mean,
so I guess
so there is, there is that part where you do have to work with
someone who qualifies to talk to you about the the illness in such
a way that they take into consideration your faith as well.
Because when you look at the DSM, or the one that I use is for our
school counselors, when you're working with someone who has
depression, anxiety, any mental health, spirituality has a place.
Meditation and mindfulness has a place, right? But then there are
other treatment like tools or skills or strategies, like your
thoughts or the routines that you have or sleeping, all of it, I
feel like does fall into our deen. We can find resources in our deen.
I wish we had more people being specialized in both, like have
your Islamic knowledge and mental health knowledge to.
Bring both together. But even if you don't have that, it's a
like there a non Muslim therapist is using can help you use your own
spirituality or your own faith to help you heal?
Does that make sense? Yes. Yes. How
you're breaking up. I mean, here. Why does this happen?
Allah Subhan, Allah wa Alhamdulillah, okay, am I back?
Yeah, yeah, you are Inshallah,
I'm reading your flips.
Yes,
I can hear you, but I don't know why it's I don't know if it's me
or if it's okay. You talked about that. I'm really somebody else
that you're breaking up. So I don't know. Are you connected to,
like, Wi Fi? No, I'm on data now.
Any better?
Yeah, I like hype well in
is this okay?
Yeah, okay, you talked about the Quran.
Uh huh. Quran regulating my emotion. Okay,
so when someone tells you
for their mental health.
All right, let me try typing this out.
Okay,
all they're doing for their mental health.
How do you
Oh, all they're doing for their mental health? Yeah, they're
healing
with,
Okay, let's try. Yeah. When people tell you they're reading Quran as
others they're doing for their mental health. How do you feel
about their healing when they're still struggling? Yeah? Allah
Alam, like, yeah. Allah said there is shifa in the Quran. It can't be
everything you do, it can be, what about, you know? What about vicar?
What about exercising and being outdoors and what about the
nutrition that you're eating? What about the thoughts that you have
that you're not really expressing, but they're contributing to how
you feel? They're contributing, and you're not. You're not talking
to someone so that they could say, Wait, that thought that you said,
How is it aligned with the message of the Quran?
How is it aligned with what is good for you? How are they
creating the illness that you're, you're you're experiencing, you
know, or when you've tried all of that,
I do believe that you know, like medication can be helpful right
now, that it is the first thing that you would jump to, but that
you are speaking with a professional that can tell you you
really have done everything, maybe it's time to include That's right,
maybe it is. It's going to help. I remember,
after Ramadan, couple of years ago, I went to my doctor and I
said, I don't want to be on this medication, like my whole room
alone,
medication. And I tried, and I would, like, I was depressed
again.
And so you, you gotta, like, trust this, that Allah subhanahu wa has
given some wisdom to this person and to the to what they're giving
you, so that it will help you as well. And that's part of my Imaan
in Allah is not shaken. Actually, I'm taking the steps to help
myself, according to our day. You know, that's so powerful. The fact
that
taking you're taking this is part of taking the steps.
Yeah, absolutely, absolutely. And you know, like the Prophet
sallallahu sallam, went towards the end of his life, when he was
getting sick, he would ask different people what they did and
what was their healing methodologies, you know? Well, you
just keep trying. Just wait for him. He'll come back. So they he
tried. He would ask different tribes, what did they know? You
know? And he is a prophet.
Didn't do that. And why am I going to do that? Right? Why did I know
that?
They didn't know
like
California
is so, like, I'm always telling people, therapy is you just having
somebody to listen to you, to hear you out, and it's not for like,
yes, a therapist does more than listening to you. They take what
you said, and they also teach you skills and strategies to show you.
Like, how is that helpful to you? But sometimes in you expressing
yourself, you hear yourself, but when I'm not talking it out, or
I'm not talking it out in a constructive way with someone that
gives enough space,
right? Right. Yeah. So when, when I
thought like the therapy, or the counseling that I do with people,
it's listening to them and saying, like, is that really what Allah, I
use that a lot. What do you think Allah will tell
you, stop and it's what we
say to ourselves, but what I am, what honey, what is Allah saying
to you about that situation? Subhanallah, that's so true.
Times we we feel like Allah
hates us, and it's actually a reflection of how about ourselves
and we project
Allah is not
angry with us. He might be angry at some things, but if I'm not
doing those things, Inshallah, if I'm asking,
he's loving he's compassionate, he's merciful. He's saying, come
to me and I'll forgive you. He's warning towards you as you are
trying to some people think like
and I wish we talked more on that. That's what I was telling you
about, what the power of studying Islam is that you hear from Allah
what He said
the Prophet,
because things, it's like things of God, have got mixed up,
culture, experiences, what I bring to the deed and no, we gotta, we
gotta get back to the sources. You know, back to the sources. Yeah,
let me hear a little bit,
and teaching as a woman and as other
challenges, and working in the community in those roles while
still
learning and trying to speak up.
Easily acceptable.
Yes.
So
to be honest with you, like
I've I've felt that I was telling you earlier about when I when I
had my son, it was hard to continue certain things, right?
But I also believe in the fact that Allah subhanahu wa like this
is important. If Allah put the love in my heart, and it's
important to me, I'm going to find a way to do it. So when I used to
teach at the academy, believe it or not, like my mom always told
me, I'm never going to be a morning person make fun of me
because I would miss work. I used to wake up at two o'clock in the
morning so I can lesson
plan and where there's a will, there's a way, and Allah subhanahu
Taala will give you that way. You know, there, I don't believe that
there's a barrier. If we're going to, if we ask Allah to help us,
he's going to show us the way, right? I do think, though there is
like, we got to be creative. We got to figure out ways that work
for us. So I used to teach on the weekends, like every Sunday, I'd
be gone the whole day, I would have multiple classes. And
the year that my son started kindergarten, he was in school
five days a week. So it felt hard on me that that year to also be
gone on a Sunday, you know. So the next year, when those classes
ended, I started doing a class online. Did I like the whole
experience? No, but I felt good that I could teach and then go
upstairs, and he's there, you know, they need or he could come
around and I could just be like, sit over there, and he would just
listen to me, you know. So it's, there's our kids. They are, they
are part of us. They're going in this, you know, if we see them as
a burden, it becomes a burden, you know.
Now I'm thinking, like, after the pandemic, what is the way that I
could still.
Teach in the community, because I love the power of being in the
same room with people without it taking a lot away from my kids and
the weekends and the evenings that they are with me when he's in
school the rest of the time. My daughter is too little, so I'm not
really thinking of her yet and her schedule,
but I think that as women, where there is a will, there is a way.
Another thing that I think a lot about is,
I see this with a lot of women, that we're creating our own
academies of institutes, you know, instead of going to the masjid and
doing it at the masjid and continuing at the masjid, and what
I what I'm thinking is, are we giving the space to do things
like, to teach and to offer what we want to offer to the community
in a platform that is already there, you know? So I wish Mrs.
Were a little bit more welcoming and open and saying, like, we need
the voice of women. We need, and not that. I've all like
experienced that like a little bit, yes, but Alhamdulillah, for
the most part, I've also felt there is this desire to say, come
in. But it's not, it's not the way we imagine it. So we end up
creating our own places, like, Oh, I know so many women that have
taken their talents and their skills in the deen, and instead of
creating it in the masjid, they're doing it on their own because they
didn't feel welcome in this place. And that, to me, like long term,
how is that serving the Masjid? How is that serving our youth when
the Muslim community automatically goes to the masjid? Right? Right?
You know? Yeah. What was the other part of the question you said?
What
was reading as a woman? I think
I know I go through this, and so
we leave the message, because we
don't.
But what other
the woman
as a woman so that that's a good one.
You know, we
the culture I grew up in.
I remember a few years ago, the first time I was invited to speak
at a conference. It was there was there was going to be both men and
women. And my mom, who's in her 70s, who's, you know, like,
traditional Somali mom, she said to me, Are there no men to teach
this? Yes, are there no men to do this? And I was like, What do you
mean, like,
like? So I come from that culture, right? So I'm doing what I have
learned and I have internalized and doing it in a way that it is
aligned with the dean. So I remember the first time I took of
love with shakas. I was that woman that was dispelling a lot of the
things that I have read, because I was thinking, wait like you're
speaking about women in a way. I have never heard women being
spoken about. I remember when I was younger, there was a book at
my house called Nisa. I read that book so many, so many times. It
was like jokes about women, like, look at the humiliation, right?
And one section basically was talking about how
said, listen to what women say and do the exact opposite. Their words
are meaningless, you know? And I grew up with this and realize
this, like, there's no worse to a woman. And so when he's like, Yes,
I remember he said,
this is like, this basically, is not authentic. It's not real
example of um. And what did like, he consulted um. You know, look at
the giants that we have in our team. Someone in my family sent me
a video of how women should not be teaching and they should be doing
it in their home. And this was what the first time that like, I
was invited to speak at a conference, and my my picture was
in a flyer, and I was thinking, if I were to listen to this shaykh
who's speaking Quran and Sunnah,
and I take that like, of course, I'm not going to get anywhere. But
alhamdulillah for the fact that Allah had taught me otherwise.
Allah had taught me otherwise. And I look at other women examples,
actually, how I show us was who lives here in Minnesota, and said,
Tamara gray doctor, hikpa, you as well. I'm like, these are women
who studied the dean. Did they study wrong Dean? Like, what kind
of Dean did they study? And what kind of Dean are you talking
about? You know? So I think that
as women, the biggest tool we have to get rid of those challenges is
to study our dean and see how did the process talk about us, how did
he talk to us, and what platforms did he give us as women? Because
if I just sit and say, I'm going to wait until someone gives me
permission. No, guess what, nobody's going to give you
permission. Oh.
Nobody's gonna come and give me permission. You know, the
permission came from Allah, and I took it, and if you have anything
with it, show me an eye of the Quran. You know, I'm so grateful.
Like this gets me heated up. I remember, you know, this phrase
that we used to always hear about so the voice of a woman is awra,
right? And those things were all filled in my head, because I grew
up in that culture, right? And I remember listening to Shaykh al
Bani, and he said, So Mara is not awra. Like, how is the hour? How
can you talk to her? It's just our like way, like when we study the
deen, we relax so much so I'm not going to let you. You're not.
You're not the ambassador between me and Allah, no,
you know what I mean. No, yeah.
Allah, yes,
yeah. No one, sorry, no, please, please, please,
keep I think that there is like there are. And I think now maybe
we live in the West, and I'm forgetting that part that I'm
assuming that everybody knows this, but maybe there aren't,
there aren't like, maybe there are still women that struggled with
it, of one, yeah, maybe there are. And
so many women are very,
very like go getters, you know. But still, this, this type of
rhetoric is also in our culture, SubhanAllah. It is so prevalent
and so many cultures, yeah, finding examples of women who are
who teach the Quran and
use that boy,
the woman, the the permission,
yeah, how can people classes?
Yeah, man, I'm not teaching right now. Um,
it's so heavy on my husband's and I am not teaching right now. I
just have a halaka where we discuss things, and it's like an
old halaka, but Inshallah, like people follow me on Instagram or
Facebook, and that's where I share my thoughts, my reflections, and
Inshallah, if I'm doing a class, I'm going to share it in there,
you know? Yeah, I'm still thinking about online, face to face. Oh, my
God, I miss this. I'm still in that place in my head, and I'm
working full time, so I'm trying to be align my schedule again,
right?
Spelling, so people,
yeah, cartoon Karani. So maybe I'll type it in here, um, cartoon
Karani. And while you're typing it out, if anyone can hear,
which is, but if clarifying a term,
oh, other
than they deserve label women that, and that's so real. Label
woman who call for
you're breaking up. Sorry. Well,
I'm so sorry.
It's been such a gift.
Thank you. Thank you so much.
Motivated.
Bless you,
I mean, and you as well. Allah, hey,
you to learn.
Oh, sorry about my connection.
Yeah, it's okay. Inshallah, I'm reading your lips. I'm going
better at this.
It's all good. It's all good. This has been so beautiful.
Three words,
I love you too.
I.