Maryam Amir – Pious women wear hijab only

Maryam Amir
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The speaker discusses several examples of women wearing incorrect clothing, including wearing it as a protection from trauma and a desire to be fit for their role as leaders. They emphasize the importance of acknowledging the community's responsibility to teach the message of love and women should not be treated as fit for their clothing. The speaker also mentions a woman who was taught to wear hesitantly by her parents and is now finding it difficult to fit in.

AI: Summary ©

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			I had a friend who was very active
		
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			in the Muslim community, always wore very large
		
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			hijabs and jibabs, organized Quran programs, attended every
		
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			lecture. At one point, she was sexually assaulted
		
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			by a community member, a community elder. She
		
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			spent years working to process the trauma, and
		
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			she also attempted suicide. She removed her hijab,
		
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			and one of the reasons is the next
		
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			story that I'm gonna share with you inshallah.
		
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			I had another friend who we used to
		
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			wear together. She used to fast every other
		
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			day and would pray to Hajjul, like, every
		
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			night. She also was a victim and a
		
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			survivor.
		
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			After a suicide attempt, she was hospitalized. And
		
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			when she was hospitalized,
		
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			the hospital refused to allow her to wear
		
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			hijab because
		
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			they said that it could be used as
		
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			a tool. When she left the hospital, she
		
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			removed her hijab. And it wasn't because she
		
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			was obsessed with the dunya or because she
		
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			was worried about what people would think about
		
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			her as she was walking down the street
		
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			and judging her. She was worried about herself
		
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			and her own safety
		
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			when it came to having
		
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			hijab on. The third example is of a
		
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			young woman who started wearing hijab in middle
		
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			school because her parents told her that hijab
		
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			is a protection from men.
		
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			I want you to consider what her feelings
		
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			towards hijab may have been when
		
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			form of protection
		
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			from assault
		
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			did not protect her. She was not taught
		
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			that abuse
		
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			is about
		
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			power and control. She was taught that abuse
		
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			is about her dress and that messaging is
		
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			one that I have heard 100 of times.
		
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			There are lots of reasons why women do
		
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			not wear hijab. This is simply a few
		
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			examples
		
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			of ones related to trauma. And we could
		
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			say that it's so sad that these sisters
		
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			were taught to center men when it came
		
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			to hijab instead of centering Allah
		
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			That had they been taught that hijab is
		
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			this, you know, deeply connected form of worship
		
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			to Allah,
		
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			maybe their navigation
		
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			of that trauma may have been different. But
		
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			if we are going to make that statement,
		
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			then we should also
		
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			look at the community
		
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			that is responsible for teaching that message. And
		
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			when we don't
		
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			bring that conversation in to the conversation on
		
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			hijab, we perpetuate this idea that women who
		
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			do not wear
		
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			not pious. When we don't even understand the
		
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			also, I realized I should have said this.
		
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			This is obviously not encouragement to remove hijab
		
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			when someone is processing trauma. I'm just sharing
		
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			with you the reality
		
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			that maybe many people are not aware of,
		
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			which is why we continue to perpetuate these
		
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			ideas of piety being tied to hijab. Of
		
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			course, hijab is a beautiful obligation, and we
		
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			should look right now especially to the woman
		
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			of Gaza who wear hijab. Women who wear
		
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			hijab and Gaza are wearing it 247
		
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			because they do not want to be martyred
		
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			without their hijabs on. Looking at that framework
		
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			of hijab as an act of worship to
		
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			Allah and building that connection, but also accountability
		
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			as a community,
		
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			providing access and mentorship and support without the
		
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			stigma and the taboo and the guilt. Helping
		
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			women see themselves
		
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			as who Allah
		
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			created them to be instead of constantly forcing
		
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			down our throats the idea that women are
		
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			fit now for just existing are all parts
		
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			of the conversation that need to happen before
		
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			we make blanket statements like pious women always
		
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			wear hijab.