Maryam Amir – Hijab your questions, your struggles, the reason
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When
I would go to the masjid and hear different khutbas and attend
conferences and listen to lectures about Islam, very often the
examples that were given in all of those lectures were about the
amazing men companions roll the Allahu Anhu. I wanted to be like
Khalid Ibn walidilahu, Anhu as he was the head of the military. I
wanted to be like Bilal roll the Allahu Anhu as he would give the
ADAT. I wanted to be like these incredible men that I kept
hearing, all of these men who changed the world and were
revolutionaries and did all these things to help with this ummah.
And then I would also hear, in very specific scenarios about the
woman companions. I would hear about Ayesha Radi Allahu Anhu and
how she was extremely modest, masha Allah. And I would hear
about Khadijah Radi Allahu anha and how she was the most amazing
wife, Radi Allahu Anhu. And I would hear about Fatima Radi
Allahu Anhu and how she was the most amazing mother, and may Allah
have mercy on all of them and enter them and enter them into the
highest paradise and honor us with being with them. Ya rab Amin,
absolutely, these were incredibly important roles and examples that
they set for us, all of which are critical and important. But at 16,
I didn't know how to explain to people modesty and hijab, and I
didn't know how to take Khadija and Fatima as role models in
motherhood and in marriage. When I was not thinking about those
things at 16 in high school, I needed to know how to navigate
being asked to a dance or someone making fun of me wearing hijab, or
being too embarrassed to pray on campus when other people could see
me, I didn't know how to navigate when someone would tell me, you
can't be like Khalid, Raleigh, because as a woman, you need to be
more quiet. As a woman, you are too outgoing as a woman, that is
not modest. It wasn't modest that I was a secondary blackball. It
wasn't modest that I love to be on skateboards. It wasn't modest that
I love to play basketball. My entire personality was immodest,
according to the messages that I was receiving, and that really
affected the way not only did I see hijab, but also myself in my
relationship with Allah. And I'd like to ask all of you to name for
me in just a few seconds, companions who are men. I want us
to honor our men who have taught us Radi Allahu Akbar. And let's
see how many names we can come up with in a few seconds. Yes,
Muhammad,
sallAllahu, alayhi, wasum. Yes, the Prophet, sallAllahu, sallam.
But there was actually a companion who was named after the Prophet
swam. So I'm going to count that as a companion who was named
Muhammad. Give me another one. Abu Bakr radila, North man, Earthman,
Ali Abu
Asmaa,
yes,
we mentioned North men. Okay, so maybe that was 20 seconds and we
got to 12 names. Let's do the same thing for a woman. You can't
repeat the same one twice. Yes, what
did you say?
Malala, radila. Anna, thank you, faulty. Matt. Rodilla. Anna Asmaa,
there were so many Asmaa, so let's count that as like five.
Okay, yeah.
Who did you say? Aisha. Aisha,
no, Slava
om Salama,
so, Maya um Habiba, Fatima,
Allahu, Akbar, Allahu, Akbar, Allahu. Akbar. Mariam was not a
prophet, a campaigner. The Prophet saw them. But maybe there was
someone named Maryam amongst the companions that I don't know of.
Zainab Ali lafayana, there were multiple Masha, Allah, Tabarak,
Allah. What I want you to understand is that so many of you
grew up in my generation where we didn't really hear about women,
and you chose to learn about who they are so you can teach your
daughters and your sons. So many of you realized where the problem
was for you and your faith. And instead of saying, I'm not going
to stay connected to this, you said, I need to teach my children
something different. And in teaching your sons and your
daughters, masha Allah, your daughters who are here and
shouting out the names with such pride and such honor, you have
shifted a narrative generationally for us. Inshallah, where I pray
that none of these young girls who are here will ever have my story,
or maybe some of your stories, where you would go to the masjid
and you wouldn't see yourself in the companions of the Prophet
sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. Now, of course, all of your experiences
are different. Some of you grew up in different countries and
different cities, and so maybe this is all you heard. Maybe woman
scholars was all you interacted with. Maybe a woman were in every
aspect of Islamic history for you and for all of you, Masha Allah,
what a privilege. And.
Gift to have had that experience, and that experience learning that
this exists is something that shifted my entire focus when I
started really focusing on studying Islam and women's issues
within Islamic law, but this idea of not knowing who the woman
companions really were made it very hard for me to connect to
hijab specifically, because I knew we weren't for modesty. But what
did that actually mean? What does what does that mean modesty? And
because I couldn't see who the woman companions were in their
personalities, I just thought I wasn't a very good Muslim. I mean,
I I had a very outgoing personality. I was a very
assertive person. Does that mean that I can't be pious too? Does
that mean that I also cannot follow the true piety of a Muslim
woman? Because all I was being told is that true piety is someone
who is very calm, who is very quiet, and who only speaks when
necessary. That was the message that I was given in certain
religious spaces that I attended.
But as I learned about who the woman actually are, I realized
that that is a very culturally influenced concept of what it
means to be a Muslim woman, because when you look at the names
that you mentioned, tabatak Allah, we had over 30 women companions
who participated physically in battles with the Prophet
sallallahu, alayhi wa sallam. There were also women who went and
cared for those who were in battle, who were nurses and who
were helping the wounded, and who served food and who gave water.
Those were other women too, but over 30 who participated
physically in battles. That means they were visible. That means they
were they were there. They were very strong.
And then a specific example, like nuevo the Allahu anha, who's
probably the most famous warrior. Many of you have heard the name
nusleiberal di olahu anha. Did you know that she's one of the
narrators of a hadith related to wearing hijab.
When we talk about the woman companions and how they interacted
with hijab. Their understanding of hijab developed over time, because
hijab was not revealed until between the 12th and the 14th year
after the Prophet saw them received the revelation, which
means for the first part of revelation for every 10 years, 12
years, up to 14 years in Mecca in the beginning of Medina, hijab was
not a requirement. What were they focusing on? Instead? I shadow,
the Allahu ad has said that, had the Quran come down with just
obligations from the beginning, Do this, don't do this. Do this.
Don't do this. No one would have done
it in the beginning, all the focus was, was mentoring the men and the
women around the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam, to
develop a depth of connection with Allah and to have a yearning and
understanding of accountability and for the hereafter.
So when we're talking about rufada, or the Allahu anha, and
how she was the most skilled surgeon amongst the companions,
and that's why the Prophet saw them, chose her to be the one to
take care of Saad rodi Allahu aku when he was injured in the Battle
of ahzad. We're doing this with an understanding of a mentorship that
she's not just doing this for the moment. She's doing this for
everything that represents taking care of her brother as a surgeon.
When we look at Hansa Radi Allahu anha, and how the Prophet saw him,
praised her poetry, she's not just doing poetry for fun. She's doing
poetry for the sake of Allah subhanahu wa and she's talking
about loss. She's talking about the loss and the mourning of those
that she loved who had died. When we look at um Hiram Radi Allahu
anha, the Prophet saw them, would visit her, and he would take naps
at her home. And there's different discussions amongst the scholars
on how she was related to the Prophet saw them. But one time he
woke up and he was very, very happy. And maybe you know this
narration, what happened when she when he woke up so happy, so I
said them, and he had a dream. And in this dream, he dreamt that his
companions were going to be sailing on a boat and wearing
crowns like kings. What did she say? In response,
yes, she asked him, so I salam to pray for her to be a part of them.
This expedition is one which is going to include fighting. And she
didn't say to the Prophet, saw,
Wow, that's amazing. Which it is. She said, How can I be there? What
can I do to be there? And this is one of the miracles of the
Prophet. Saw them. It's a prophecy of the Prophet sallam, because he
not only made to offer her in one narration and another narration,
he told her, so I Salam that you will be amongst them. Do you know
how old she was when she joined?
She was 75 years old. Decades after this moment, the Prophet saw
them had already passed away. She and her husband, arbad and Ibn
saw.
It were with the army that were part of opening Jerusalem, that
were part of Muslims going in with peace, with the keys handed to
them from the head of the Christians, who was in the Old
City of Jerusalem, looking up Subhanallah over the wall. He's
whole. He's the one holding the key, saying that this key belongs
in their books to someone who was described exactly as AMR the
Allahu Anhu. So he gave the key to AMA RadiAllahu, anhu, and they
entered mashallah, Aqsa om Hiram, RadiAllahu, anha. After this in a
prophecy that came true this dream that came to of the Prophet saw
them, she wanted to join, and she did, and no one said, you know,
you're 75 now, that was like a while ago that you wanted this
maybe reconsider, because no age, either young or older,
is one which shouldn't serve Allah, subhana wa Taala in every
capacity possible.
So um Hiram had a sister named um sulaym, and um sulaym was standing
one time at a battle, and she had a dagger, and the Prophet saw him.
Is like, Why do you have a dagger? And she's like, so I can be here.
She wanted to be there to defend she wanted to be there to be a
part of supporting the Muslim community and supporting the most
vulnerable, because it's not just about Muslims, it's about anyone
who needs justice. And when I learned their stories, I started
realizing that these women also were women that I could see myself
in. Some of them were quiet and some of them were loud. Some of
them were shy, some of them were outgoing. Some of them worked.
Some of them worked at home. Only some of them were full time
mothers. Everyone is a full time mother, but some of them were
working mothers. There were all different circumstances, and I
finally started to see that I am actually one of those types of
women, a woman who is nuanced, a woman who sometimes wants to be
out there and other times needs time alone with my lord, a woman
who gets scared sometimes like they sometimes did, but they were
steadfast. We see their examples tangibly in the woman of Reza
today that those women are wearing what many of us wear at home, our
prayer garments when we don't want to put our whole hijab on that we
go outside with we throw on our prayer garments. I saw a woman in
I wonder always, is she still alive, that she was sitting in a
room with her young child, and this is in the beginning, before
every building was just completely decimated. And she's sitting and
she says, We wear our Salah clothes, ready at any moment to go
back to Allah,
that type of dedication, to wear it 24/7, in your house. Of course,
it's an honor to our hijab, obviously, but don't you get hot
in it sometimes, aren't there? Times you go home and you
literally rip it off. I do. I'm tired of wearing it. I just need
some space. I need a moment to breathe. They're wearing it 24/7
knowing that it might be their last breath. That level of
dedication is something that we see embodied today from the
example of the woman companions rule the Allahu anhu, when they in
their culture, used to dress. It was common for men and women to
cover their hair, culturally, on a cultural level, and
one of the questions I'm often asked is, why doesn't the Quran
say, cover your hair. Why isn't the word hair in the verse?
But look at the reality. Culturally, men and women actively
covered their hair. You can imagine it's super hot. Haven't
you ever been or maybe some of you have been to Saudi or to a country
where men wear long thobes And then they wear something on their
head and from the back, have you thought that they were a woman?
It's happened to me so many times. I'm like, Oh, that's a woman. I'm
like, that's actually not a woman.
That culture where men and women dressed in very modest, baggy,
loose clothing was also something that was part of the culture pre
prior to the revelation. But what would the woman used to do? They
used to cover their hair a bit here, not fully, and then they
would throw back their garments. So this whole area was exposed,
their neck, their chest, all of this was exposed their ears. So
what does the Quran say? There's two different verses talking about
hijab, and neither one says the word hijab. Hijab today is a
cultural understanding of how we call what we wear over our heads,
but the Quran uses the word khimar,
and khimar is basically a synonym for hijab as we use it today. But
the himar in the verse that's being described is telling these
women companions to take what they already have over their head and
to bring it forward, to cover this area, to cover this area, and it's
mentioned in the description of the verse, What to cover. Now, if
I'm going to ask you right there to put on your hat, can you stand
up for me for a second?
You you.
You know you, but also you, both of you. Yes, both of you, yes.
Take a stand. Oh, all three. Everyone, everything, anyone who
wants to take a stand. So I'm gonna ask our dear sister right
here, okay, sister, who's wearing a blue hijab, what's your name?
May Allah bless you or mother for choosing, literally, the best name
in the world for women. No offense to everyone else. May Allah bless
you and your family and everyone, I mean, and the one next to you,
Sadia, is your name? Beautiful name too, mashallah and Sarah also
beautiful. MashaAllah, okay, I want you to watch Mariam. Maryam,
you're going to pretend to have a hat. Pretend you have a hat in
your hands. Hold your hold your hat. Can you put your hat on?
Perfect. Sadia. Sadia. Can you put your hat on?
Okay, Sarah, can you put your hat on? Okay. Why did all of you put
it on your heads? I didn't specify put it on your head. Why did you
do that? That's
what you use it for. You put a hat on your head.
Okay? Thank you may Allah. Bless you all so much. Thank you, three
different people. Therefore, it's proven in the whole entire world
that I wouldn't need to tell you to put your hat on your head,
because you're not going to put it on your elbow. You are not going
to put it on your knee. When you're holding a hat, you will put
it on your head. And the people who are learning the Quran in that
moment are being told to take what's already on their head and
cover the parts that are not covered. They understand what that
means. Now, if we're going to say, okay, but that's not clear enough,
we can talk about a hadith that address it too. But the point is,
when they heard this verse, their response, as described by Aisha
Radi Allahu anha and um Salama radiAllahu anha, which is very
important, the people who are explaining to us what happened
when hijab was worn are women. Every narration, many narrations
that we have that describe what people did when the verse was
revealed were narrated by women themselves. So we have to
understand, how did woman understand hijab when that verse
was revealed, the woman narrated that. The woman responded by
taking clothing, including the curtains on their windows, and
just grabbing it and covering their hair. Now you're going to
see in some translations of the Quran that it says everything
except for one eye. Maybe you've come across a translation like
that before that is a translator putting their interpretation of
what hijab is into the verse in parentheses, which is very
confusing if you don't know that, and you're reading a translation,
which is what happened to me as I was reading a translation,
especially because the narration that this particular translation
is based on is not an authentic narration in the first place. But
the point is that sometimes when we are talking about hijab, we are
going to see people share their personal understanding of what
hijab is. For example, there are other verses in the Quran talks
about Jill bab. I grew up thinking that a Jill Bab, which is, you
know, a dress that's kind of just worn in one overflow dress, is the
form of dress that I need to dress in as a Muslim woman, because the
Quran says, Jill bab. But the Jill Bab we see today is not the Jill
Bab that woman would wear in the time of the Prophet saw them.
That's not what they would dress like. Our concept of Jill Bab has
evolved, and now Jill Bab is a very cultural dress with a
particular culture. So when we see someone from Malaysia or from
Pakistan or from other parts of the world not wearing that in
their cultural dress, does that mean all of these millions of
people are wrong in the way they wear hijab? No, it means we have
not understood that jabab does not mean an Arabic cultural dress. It
just is talking about what needs to be covered, in general, in
these areas of the body in a loose way that is not transparent. Part
of, again, the concept of bringing in interpretation that's based in
culture in Islam is that many times we have been taught that
very muted colors are more pious, or, for example, black
specifically, is more righteous because it is a dark color that
doesn't attract attention. Have you ever heard something similar
to that before? What color did I shadow the Allahu anha wear when
she was in ishram? Tell me
sorry.
It wasn't white. It was red, very similar to our dear sister and
what she is wearing, yes, our both of these dear sisters, masha
Allah, and a number of other women, including me,
Aisha, radiAllahu anha and Ihram, she wore saffron. She wore the
color of saffron. There's another narration of um salamat al di
Allahu anha wearing the.
Color of saffron. So when we're talking about hijab and what it
looks like in the Ideal Muslim woman and a particular image comes
into our mind, I want us to have a conversation with ourselves
internally and recognize that that image may have been one that
someone else has painted for us, but that's not necessarily the
image that the Quran and the Sunnah have left for us and the
women who were because color, for example, is varied, is defined by
culture, is defined by Urf and Islamic law. If you go to a
country where every single person is wearing black and you choose to
wear red, it may not be haram to wear red, but it's not advisable
to wear red because you may send a signal that other people
understand in a different way than everyone wearing black. Does that
make sense? So cultural context is very important. Islam always takes
into account the culture of a region, as long as it doesn't
interfere with specifics in Islamic law, or especially, of
course, no doubt in aqidah that cannot be changed. So when looking
at these general rules, when it comes to Islam, and it comes to
hijab, we see that one time there was a narration of Asmaa Radi
Allahu anha, and she came to the Prophet, saw them, and he told her
basically that she should cover in clothing that's not translucent
and she can show her face in her hands. Have you ever come across
this narration? It's like the narration that was taught for
hijab. What's the problem with the narration?
What say it's so loud for me. Okay, sorry.
Apparently we did not have the same childhood. What
happened in my childhood, in my teenage hood, is that this
narration suddenly everyone knew that it was not fully authentic,
and we had learned it to be the only narration in which hijab was
established. And so all of a sudden everyone was confused.
Well, the Quran doesn't say, the word hair. And all of us who are
not native Arabic speakers and were not Arab and didn't know how
to tram use other things, anything other than translation, would come
across this one narration that's no longer authentic, and we would
say, Okay, does that mean hijab is actually not what the women
companions did. But we have other narrations like nusleva The
Warrior, and she's talking to another woman named Hafsa, and she
is saying that she witnessed that a woman came to the Prophet
sallallahu, alayhi wasallam, and the Prophet saw them.
She asked him, saying that she would go to battle, and she
accompanied her husband also in battle. I think something happened
to the mic, and when they would go. She didn't have a hijab to
wear, like a whole thing to wear, so she didn't know what to do.
Now, what's so interesting about this narration is that Hafsa, rodi
Allahu, Anta, when noseiba is telling this to her, when noseiba
is telling this to her, thank you. I'm just gonna try. When noseba is
telling this to her, the way that she reacts, the way that she
responds is,
well, the Prophet SAW them's answer is not to say, then stay
home. The Prophet SAW them's answer is to say, borrow something
from her sister, because she still should witness the good. She
should still come out and participate the good. She should
still be involved. Over and over the Prophet saw them focused on
how women are going to be involved in different spaces, different
ways that works for you, your circumstance, and how you can
contribute to the community.
And one of the ways that the woman companions navigated this
relationship with Allah, how they felt this ability to do what the
woman in alza are doing is their interaction with the Quran.
Many times here we focus on hijab as the most important act of
worship that's ever existed. I was in a masjid where a woman came and
wanted to convert, and she said that she wants to take her
Shahada. We all made a circle around her, and she wasn't wearing
hijab. She had just walked in to give her Shahada. And a woman went
and she had gotten a hijab there from the Masjid. She came and just
put it on her head.
I thought this was so rude. Number one, she's about to give her
Shahada. Let her focus on her moment of Shahada. But to what
message does this give to this dear sister before even witnessing
that Allah is your Lord and that the Prophet peace Yohan is a final
messenger of the revelation hijab
more important than you even coming to Allah hijab before you
even come to Allah hijab.
Do we have 12 to 14 years of mentorship for our sisters?
Do our sisters feel like they can walk into a masjid space and be
who they are, navigate who they are, bring our concerns and our
worries and our fears and our trauma and all of it?
Say this is who I am, or do we hide parts of ourselves because we
know we may not be accepted? Do we hide parts of ourselves because we
don't know how people are going to react to who we really are? And
sometimes that's natural. Sometimes you don't know everyone.
You're not going to share everything. But do our children
have a space that they know that they can fully explore the
questions of their identity and still be welcome. Abdullah MCC is
an excellent example of a masjid that does do all of those things,
masha Allah,
but the fact is that the Prophet saw
his Companions would learn the Quran, and they would live the
Quran, and they would think and interact with the Quran outside of
the space of hijab,
but they had their struggles too. The companions of the Prophet,
they struggled with things like drinking. They struggled with
things that were major, major sins. And what we see in their
time period is something interesting. There's a statement
of Aisha Radi Allahu Anka, where she says that if the prophet saw
them were here today, we're seeing women today, that he would not
have said that women should not be prevented from going to the
masjid. She would have said, he would have said, so I Salam, that
women should be prevented from going to the masjid. Have you
heard that statement before some of you have
so this is Aisha, a scholar, a scholar as a woman, saying, what
women are doing today is so bad
that the Prophet saw someone would have said, prevent women from
Going to the masjid. Here is my question, are we worse as a
society now than we would they would have been at the time of
Aisha, aldilo, Juan ha would you say yes or no?
Yes, generally Yes, because we say the proximity to the Prophet saw
them would have changed things. But
were people in Medina engaging in every type of relationship that
was not Islamically acceptable in the time of the Prophet saw them?
Yes. Did they commit major sins in the time of the Prophet saw them?
Yes. Did women dress in particular ways or act in particular ways
that women do today every day? Culturally? Yes. So what was it
that the woman in the time of Aisha did that was so different
from the time of the Prophet? So I sent them that she would make this
statement, we don't know. We don't know what it is. It was something
specific. But why that's important is because when talking about
hijab and woman and modesty. Oftentimes a statement of a woman
companion will be used and will will be used as the example for
this is what Aisha, your mother, said about woman. But our question
needs to be, would she actually say that today? Because maybe
whatever they were doing then is not being done, being done now,
because what we see today was during the time of the Prophet. So
I said that all those things existed. So maybe instead what she
would have said, which is what Abdul Halim Abu Shaka said, Maybe
instead she would have said
that, considering the time now, considering all we are exposed to,
we are expected to do. We are judged for all we have to carry on
our shoulders, all we have to go through. Maybe instead of being
prohibited from the masjid, in her statement, it would have been it's
an obligation for women to go to the masjid, because we need a
space where we can fall apart. We need a space where we can seek
refuge with Allah, no matter how we walk in that this is a space
for Allah and that Allah knows all of our journeys with hijab and
every other aspect of Islam. Hijab is very physical, and that's why
it's so difficult. A lot of judgments are made on both
directions based on it, but only Allah knows the reality of what
someone is going through internally, and because the
Prophet saw them focused so much on building a nation of people who
connected to hijab, because it's just one of many aspects, many
aspects of Their relationship with Allah, the focus wasn't hijab. The
focus was you and your relationship with Allah. What we
see from the Companions is the way they interact with the Quran was
very actively many times, especially Inshallah, with Ramadan
coming up, may Allah bless us with seeing it. May Allah protect the
people of ghaza and Sudan and all over the world, and bless them
with complete justice before Yoruba Amin, what we see often in
Ramadan is reading the Quran as quickly as possible. But what we
have from Asmaa, for example, Radi Allahu anha. She's the daughter of
Abu Bakr.
She would recite one ayah over and over again.
She would say, what Abu.
Omen
one time, be very aware of the day that you are going to be returned
to Allah, and then she would say it again
over and over and over, every time it has a different meaning, you
apply it in a different way. There's a companion of the
Prophet, so I send them who prayed Maghrib behind the Prophet. So I
send them. Have you ever been going through all of Ramadan and
you haven't shed a single sweet Ramadan tear, and you're like,
what's wrong with me? Has that happened to you? Have you been to
Mecca or Medina and not been emotional? And thought, maybe you
don't have strong Iman. Have you been in Arafat and not really
focused in your DUA? And then thought, Maybe I'm not actually a
believer. Many of us as human beings have had those experiences,
and we often think it means that we're not good enough in our
relationship with Allah,
but there's a companion of the Prophet saw them. His name was
jubir, and he was standing in Salah behind the Prophet,
sallAllahu, alayhi wa sallam,
and he said he heard the verses that the Prophet saw them recited,
and they were
Shay in a
were they created from nothing, or did they create themselves?
Subhanallah,
this ayah, he said for the first time he felt he met in his heart,
he felt like he was going to fly in the sky
a companion who's already converted, a companion who's
praying with the Prophet. So he said them, who said it wasn't
until this moment that he truly tasted faith. It is okay for you
not to feel like you are in love with Islam. Sometimes it is okay
for you to struggle. It is okay when you make a mistake and you
hate the fact that you do it, but you keep doing it, and it is okay
if you wish that you used to be who you used to be. You wish that
you were who you used to be. But the fact is that Allah's Panama
Taala isn't seeing you only in the moment where you're telling
yourself, I wish I was better, I'm not good enough. I wish I was
better. I'm not good enough. Allah sees the moment from the time you
were in your mother's womb, and even before that, he knows every
single struggle you have had in every capacity and all of that
journey has been one in which you have still chosen to be here.
The fact that you've still chosen to be here is a testament to your
love for him, but even more so, it's a testament for his love for
you. It
is a testament of his love for you. The way that you feel about
yourself is not the way that Allah sees you. You don't have a right
to tell yourself Allah doesn't love me, or Allah will not forgive
me, or Allah doesn't think I'm good enough. You don't have a
right to tell yourself that you know what Islam. Part of Islam, an
act of worship, is having hope in Allah,
having good thoughts about Allah. It's an act of worship for you to
believe that Allah loves you and that he is with you.
And that perspective is one that we see that the Prophet sallallahu
alayhi was sent them deeply embedded in his companions.
Because when we look at interactions between the
Companions,
sometimes they would make mistakes, and the Prophet sway
Salam could have easily blamed a woman, because one time, a woman
who was known as a very beautiful woman, came and spoke to the
Prophet sway Salam, she had a question. She came. It was after
Hajj. It was during Hajj, but after the days of Ihram. So she's
no longer in Ihram, and this is a very important point to know,
because otherwise, many say she was in Ihram, and that's why she
didn't cover her face. No, Ihram was already out, she just didn't
cover her face. She wore hijab without covering her face, and she
was very beautiful in mashallah, Islam does not condemn Allah
creating woman beautifully. We should be beautiful in our hijab,
whatever that beauty means to you.
She comes and she asked the Prophet, saw them a question, and
behind her is his cousin, alfad, who was a young man. There's two
different there's a few different narrations on this, but there
happens in two different ways. In one, he sees her, and he's like
tabatical Allah, tabatical Allah, and so the Prophet saw them, sees
him looking at her, and he gently turns alfadel face away from
staring at her. There's another narration.
There's another.
Narration when he keeps looking and she's looking at him, and he's
looking at her, and she's looking
turning his face away.
Now I want you to understand that when the Prophet saw them, talks
about hijab, talks about women's roles, teaches all of these
realities for us, it was never done in the space of shaming or
blaming woman for existing. Her beauty was not asked to be
covered. She was not asked to leave and have someone else ask
the question. The Prophet saw them, didn't tell her that she
should have someone else be in this space. The Prophet saw them,
addressed him and taught him how to respect a woman in front of
him, mentored him. So I said them on how to be respectful, and
allowed for her to ask a question when she's not being stared at
SallAllahu, alayhi wa sallam. And another narration in the masjid,
this is a narration in Imam Ahmed. There was a another woman who's
described as a beautiful woman, and she would come to the masjid
to pray, and she would stand in the front lines of the masjid.
And there were a group of young men who would come later to stand
in the back lines of the masjid, so that in Salah, when they go
down in Ruko, they could stare at her.
These are men who are going into Salah in the masjid of the Prophet
saw them. Of the Prophet saw them to look at a woman who's praying
in the back row.
And do you know how the Prophet saw them addressed it, Quran was
revealed for it. And the Quran simply says, We know those of you
who go to the back and we know those of you who go to the front.
It didn't address the woman being told that she shouldn't come to
the masjid,
the Prophet says, didn't build a barrier between men and women so
that her beauty was not distracting the men.
It was self accountability
when we talk about hijab, teaching that perspective, that hijab is
not for men. Hijab is for Allah, that we wear hijab for Allah, that
we wear hijab even when we pray in the middle of the night in our own
room, that it is for Allah subhanahu wa,
it allows for hijab not to be weaponized. I taught a haloka of
young girls, middle schoolers. There was like maybe 10 of them.
I asked they all wore hijab, and I asked them why they wear hijab?
Every single answer was one of two.
I wear it so that I can save myself from my husband,
and I wear it to protect myself from men.
This was maybe 15 years ago,
and I saw one of those women
years later, and now she's out of college,
and in her experience. I'm not
going to go into details, but you can imagine things, and because we
have different ages here, so I just want to be a little careful.
But she was questioning hijab. She was questioning Islam, because all
she was told is going to protect her. It
didn't happen. All that she saved herself for was destroyed. And
I've heard that message over and over and over again
when we teach ourselves and our girls and boys that hijab is not
for our boys. Of course, boys have to wear hijab in their own way,
and we teach our girls that hijab is not for boys. We teach our
young girls that we're wearing hijab for Allah,
that Allah is our refuge no matter what we are going through. Then
that connection, keeping that connection, maintaining that
connection, no matter what we go through,
is one where we don't start resenting hijab because we were
taught that it is the ticket to everything that will never happen
in a bad way to us, or that we will be protected in some way. The
Quran does say that hijab is a protection, but it doesn't specify
how
hijab is a protection. In the many different wisdoms of hijab, for
every single person's experience. Hijab can be a protection from
someone being extra focused with their outside to the point that
they can't focus on other aspects of their life, or maybe spend that
time or that money in a different way. Hijab can be a protection in
the ways that maybe some of us have conventionally thought of it
can be hijab can be a protection in lots of things, but I'll tell
you how I thought of hijab being a protection. This week, Kamala
Harris came here to the bay, and I was at a protest outside of the
building. Her program was for reproductive rights for women, and
she's going around trying to re campaign. It's so ironic.
It because we know that women in Alexa are giving birth on the
floor with no clean water, and they're having C sections without
anesthesia, and we know that we are funding it with our tax
dollars, with her support. So we're standing outside protesting
and inside the building. A number of women who received the
invitations to go in, some of them were hijab. Some of them didn't
throughout the event, they would stand up and they would scream,
ceasefire now. And her event was interrupted so many times. The
next day, she had an event in another state. And did you see
what happened when two women with hijab tried to enter? They didn't
let them in. They said, You disinvited from this event. And I
immediately went to protection. I go to protection. Do you know why?
Because they can't racially profile every single person. If
they do, no one is going to be at their event, and they need the
optics of diversity so they can't just say no, no one can go. They
don't know who's going to stand up. Because at our event, there
were people from the Jewish community, there were people from
the Native American community, and we know that Muslims can be so
many different races. There's no way to be able to specify. And we
know Muslim women wear hijab. Muslim women don't. There's no way
they'd be able to tell. But for these two women, they were able to
be racist, very boldly Islamophobic. And do you know what
I thought of as protection? I said Allahu, Akbar,
a woman in hijab is so powerful and such a threat that they see
her and they don't even want to have her come in, because they
assume that she is going to vocally speak for justice.
It is a protection that someone would see you and say she's not
going to stay silent. It is a protection that they would see you
wearing hijab and say she is a threat. She is so powerful that
her voice is going to disrupt us. That is a protection. The last
thing we would ever want to be is have an opportunity in the face of
someone who's an oppressor and stay silent
when we though think about that. Sometimes that's a lot of
pressure. I know I've had days where I don't want to be the
billboard walking for Islam. I've had a bad day. I'm very, very
tired. I'm just in a bad mood. And then someone's like, oh, Islam is
so oppressive. I'm like, No, I am exhausted. Aren't you so hot in
that? Yes, I am. I'm very hot in that. And you know what? I'm hot
for the sake of Allah.
But the point is, sometimes I don't want to be someone who has
to stand up for everything, because I can't emotionally. I
don't have the capacity in that moment. Or maybe I'm not an
introvert, but maybe if you're an introvert, I've heard from many of
my friends who are, they're like, I don't want to have to explain a
hijab all the time. It's very overwhelming. And I didn't mean to
specifically say introverts. I mean anyone, maybe sometimes, at
some point, you just don't want to talk to people all the time. And
this is when I think it's important for us to look at the
example of Meriam alaihi salam, and we're going to close with her
story. Inshallah, Meriam Alaihe Salam. Many of you know that
Virgin Mary was the first woman ever to be entered into beitel
muqdis, to be entered in to this space, which is now Masjid Al
Aqsa. It is the place that so many prophets, every prophet, every
space of Masha, there has been a prophet or an angel that has
walked upon it. There's not a single space this big in which a
prophet or an angel hasn't walked there. And many was the first
woman to be entered there as someone who's worshiping and
serving the masjid now, she spent her days in worship. She spent it
quietly in worship and praying and fasting and doing good. She had
her time that private contemplative time with Allah.
But she also turned that into action in that when Angel Jibreel
alayhi salam came and told her the news of her having a child.
Before he gave that news, he was in the form of a man, and the
description of him is that he was a very beautiful man standing in
her chamber. So she walks in and she's like, why is a man in my
chamber? And you can imagine this is probably the first time ever a
man is in her chamber, other than zakiriya, the prophet who was her
uncle, taking care of her alias.
So the way that she responds. Do you know what she says? You know
some of you know who can recite the verse for us?
Please. We want to hear you.
A okay, what were the two names that Allah spent on Tala is called
by by her.
Yes, sorry, one name, yes, exactly, exactly she reminds him
of a Rahman, a Rahman the Most Compassionate, the Most Merciful.
She didn't say the one who is the Punisher. She reminded him to go
back to Allah. He's the most merciful and SubhanAllah. What is
the response? Angel? Jabil is so overwhelmed by the power of her
voice that he flips into the form of an angel. He goes from man to
Angel. Flips.
Yes. And he says, I am here. I'm just here for a messenger. I'm
just a messenger here to tell you you're gonna have a baby, which,
of course, is terrifying for her. And I want you to know her
reaction is not to say, Allahu, Akbar, I've been chosen. It's to
be terrified. And then she gives birth again, terrified. The Quran
keeps recording how scared she is, how worried she is. It's human,
even when an angel, the angel, comes to you and gives you news,
glad tidings from your Lord. Allah called it a gift. She didn't see
it as a gift in the moment. And what did Allah tell her to do
after she had given birth and she had eaten and drink it drink and
rested? What did he tell her go to the people that she needed to go
to the people with the baby. She needed to be the one to go to her
people, to show them the baby to be there physically. He could have
told Angel Jibreel to go Allah. Could have told zakiria, are they
his salaam to go a baby speaking from the cradle, saying, I'm here
with Prop to zakiriya. And my mother is Mariam. She's Virgin
Mary, and she's actually a miracle. My birth is a miracle.
You're going to believe a baby that was just born if they're
speaking and saying they're from God, but Allah wanted her to be
there. Alayha Salam, just like Allah wants you and me, us to be
there, he has chosen us to be here, in this moment in
California, for a reason, in this year, whatever we think that we
are going through, and when we feel like we're not enough, he
knows you're enough, and that's why you're a part of this ummah.
And that is why Allah SWT tells us, in the end of Surah Al hajj,
he says, wa
jahila
al
Ali Kumu
WA Sulu Shahid, Analy kumuta, kono
wata Kun,
Swann
FA
this first starts with, keep going, keep striving, keep going,
do the act, do the work.
And then it ends with, he is your ally.
He is the best ally. He is the one who will give you victory. He is
the one who's going to support you. He sees every single one of
you. And what did he put in the beginning of that verse? He has
chosen you who would?
He's chosen you for a quality he sees inside of Meriam, inside of
every single one of you. He chose you for a reason, that we are here
for a reason in this time period, in this ummah, for a reason. So
know that he sees you, specifically you, and all that you
go through and in the journey of hijab, that the reason we either
wear this the wisdoms change, sometimes it helps us feel all
these different things. But at the end of the day, whether we hate it
and we're struggling with it, which is so real, or we love it
and it's our favorite thing, and it's never, never a test, wherever
you are in between, in that,
that we wear hijab for Allah, and
that every single second that you wear it, every single second that
you wear it, of course, it's one that's blessed. It's one that's
rewarded, of course, but also in following the footsteps of the
woman companions, rodi, aloha and Hun, it's us sharing their
narrative, continuing their story, and Inshallah, being able to be
those who the next generation says, I was inspired to come
closer to Allah. I was inspired to keep going with the Quran. I was
inspired to feel close to my Muslim identity because of the
woman who came before me, and that inshaAllah is all of us.
Subhanallah, we have nickna.