Maryam Amir – AntiBlackness, Accountability, Healing thru Quran Hafitha Layla Graham
AI: Summary ©
AI: Transcript ©
Subhanallah, Alhamdulillah, Allah, ILAHA, illallah, Allahu Akbar,
subhanAllah, you Alhamdulillah, ILAHA, illallah, Allahu Akbar,
Alhamdulillah, mean Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah,
Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah,
Alhamdulillah.
Alhamdulillah,
Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah, WA, Alaikum as salaam.
Warahmatullah Subhanallah, WA, Alhamdulillah, WA, salaam.
Warahmatullah,
walaykum as salaam. Warahmatullah Subhanallah WA, Alhamdulillah,
Allah.
Alhamdulillah.
Alhamdulillah.
How are you?
I don't know, I love you so much. This
is what happens friends do lives. We just gush about each other. Oh
my gosh. I'm so honored and grateful that you are here today.
Let me introduce
everyone to you. This is hafida, Layla, Graham, masha Allah, she is
a Quran coach. She's a founder of a Montessori curriculum that
actually infuses decolonization and the concept of self with
Quranic healing. Inshallah, today, she's going to speak to us about
so much. I'm, actually, I'm, you know, I'm, well, we'll just get
started with what speak about.
You
have mashallah and you also, Hamdulillah. You also founded a
Montessori school with decolonization as part of the
curriculum. Tell us about your journey to this to the space that
you're in right now.
Well, I'll try to be concise. Inshallah, so I memorize the Quran
back in high school. Alhamdulillah, I had many, many
Quran teachers. I pray for them all the time. May Allah bless them
for their work with me and for being patient with me. But I did
finish my half of a little bit before graduating high school. And
then, basically, when I was around 23 i i decided to train to become
a Montessori teacher for early childhood. So that's for ages two
to six years old, okay? And subhanAllah, as we were going
through the course, I realized that the philosophy spoke to me as
a Muslim, like I just felt like the philosophy was the Sunnah.
And I talked to my trainer about this, my mentor, and I told her,
how, like, is it okay for us to incorporate this in, into our
religion? Like, to incorporate our religion into this? And she's
like, Absolutely, she said, You should not be separating your
religion from from what you're teaching the children in the
classroom and so, and she's, she was a Christian. She wasn't. She
was a Muslim who taught us so SubhanAllah. That's when, like, I
started thinking,
you know, there is a holistic way to educate the children, our
Muslim children, and according to the Sunnah, but also according to
what we know from science and child development. So Subhanallah
last year, I pre launched prime learning resources. I did not get
to launch it yet, but Inshallah, I'm hoping this year
sometime in the spring or early summer. So what I hope to do is,
like you said, provide a curriculum that decolonizes
education where we can, we can, we can. We can talk honestly with our
children, without without whitewashing, without white
centering, without bringing our history from a like a colonized
lens. So Inshallah, like I feel like that will empower our
children and give them the confidence to navigate the world
as a Muslim, like growing up, we, we. I grew up a Muslim.
Alhamdulillah, I grew up a Muslim. But did I have the confidence that
I see in my children today? No, with Subhanallah like I feel like
they're unapologetically Muslim, like my my son, you know, when he
was attending the public school, he would take his must have to
school. And I was like, What are you doing? Why are you taking the
must have to school? And he was like, because we have silent
meeting time, and I want to read the Quran. And like, for me, that
was just, that's something I would have never dreamt of when I was an
eight or nine year old SubhanAllah. So this is, like, my
whole i.
I guess you could say my whole mission is to foster the love of
Quran in the hearts of children, and also to really
take back our our story. Take Back Our story from from those who have
been telling it for us, basically. And I'm talking about not only
from a Muslim standpoint, but also indigenous people, black people,
you know, people of other other cultures, like I remember, you
know, one thing that I loved so much as a child was geography. I
was, I was in love with geography. I used to memorize country names
and capitals and everything. Like, by the age of nine, I had already
memorized all the states and everything.
Yeah, I started early, but, but, but Subhanallah, like when I
started my my own education, like, by myself, because I homeschooled
for a while in high school, I realized that, you know, what I
see on maps is not what is the truth really like? I remember the
first time I realized that the map that we see, the world map that we
see, is a distorted version of the world and the distorted version of
the planet. And it disturbed me, because, you know, someone who
loved geography so much. Why is this? Why is this a thing? Why
aren't we teaching the children
the reality of our of our world? So until now, I have not. I have
yet to buy a map for my children, even though I love, I love, love,
love having like maps and stuff on the wall. But I'm hoping to buy
the
there's a version of a map that is less distorted. I forgot the name
of it, though, maybe, you know,
maybe you've heard of it, but Inshallah, this is, this is what I
hope to do,
and take just, just to just decolonize our education.
Decolonize it, and make the integration of Islam into our
children's education seamless so they don't see a difference
between studying their religion and studying science and studying
math and studying geography. Yes, that's that's the real that's the
real goal, Inshallah, because our dean is relevant across the board
in every facet of our life. So that's that's the goal for Prime
inshallah.
Can you share a little bit more about math? There are a few
questions where people might have never heard of this concept
before. Why is it that maps that we typically see are distorted.
Okay, yes, so the maps that we typically use in school, that we
use in school to learn the continents and the countries, what
I found was that the northern hemisphere is
is like disproportionately bigger than the southern hemisphere, and
this was due to, I believe, the Roman Catholic Church,
who commissioned map makers to, like, create this, this sort of,
this sort of distortion, to make it look like the the Christian
world was Bigger than the non Christian world, basically. And so
North America is looks huge, and Europe and Russia and like these,
like predominantly Christian nations, they look so much bigger
than like South America and Africa, and like Southeast Asia
and and so like that, I think is so damaging for our children, and
not only for like children of color, but even for white
children, because it it messes up their their perception of who they
are and what the world is. So that's that's something that I
realized also, even in Monster curriculums, which I mean, like
predominant, predominantly are produced by, you know, by European
companies or American companies.
They, they also follow this standard, unfortunately. So I'm
trying to basically introduce something different. Inshallah,
hopefully, if I, if I manage to get the resources for that. But
like, for instance, you know, Asia, there are so many like, I
can't even explain you, there's, there's, there are puzzle maps for
every continent in the Monte curriculum, and for North America
and Europe,
every single country has a puzzle piece. But then when it comes to
Asia and Africa, they got puzzle pieces like put together in one
or, you know, just like the whole ISRAEL PALESTINE thing, like, why
is it? Why is it called Israel? And then.
Like, just the the pieces itself, some of them are much smaller than
how they should be if they're, like in Asia or in Oceania. So
actually Oceania, they don't even include Hawaii and the Polynesian
islands. They only include like Australia and like New Zealand,
really. So that's something that we don't realize until we really,
really look at things from a critical lens, SubhanAllah. So I'm
very, I'm very, very careful about what I introduced to my children.
I don't want them to have to unlearn so much like like I did,
and like we did, like all of us did, SubhanAllah. So that's one
thing that that's just one thing. Though there's so much more
impacts your psyche as you grow up. Just so it's the impact is
tan, absolutely.
Why are you what? What brought you to critically considering
of race and in the lens of them,
I think, I think that would have to start when I was in high school
SubhanAllah. I didn't have a traditional schooling. So like for
one year of my high school, I was actually in Canada in a madrasa, a
boarding school for girls, SubhanAllah. It was one of the
best years of my life, one of the best years of my life Hawaii. I
know some of those sisters are watching now, and I can tell you
guys like it's been over 15 years, and we have created such a bond in
that school, subhanAllah, so the so like one year I was there, and
the rest of the high school I homeschooled, so I had a lot of
time on my hands to just, you know, read what I want to, watch
what I want to and and, just like, look into things. I used to stay
up all night, just just researching history and
researching things on the internet
about, about our people, about, you know, black people, about
Muslim people,
about our government also. Because, I mean, let's face it,
you know, we're, we're taught a version of, like, civics and US
government in school. That is not really true. So I think that's
when I started to become, you could say,
for lack of better word, radicalized, because I just, I
just realized, like just so much of it is a lie, so much of it is a
lie. And
so from then on, basically I never stopped. I never stopped reading
and researching and looking for the truth
and just just realizing that, especially for black people in
this country,
we've internalized a lot of our self hatred. We've internalized
it, and we don't realize how much hurt we're holding inside of
ourselves until we come across something different,
the concept of loving yourself,
you know, I understand. We understood, okay, yes, you have to
love yourself, you know,
you know, Allah created you, and you're a special human being and
all of that. But, but, but for black people, there needed to be a
different kind of self love, because we were taught for so many
years to despise what makes us us, and that's something I think when
I was around 20, I started to really Like
heal from, I'm still healing from Subhanallah, I mean, until now.
But one of the first things I think, for most black women in
general, is their hair, really their hair. And it does. It
doesn't seem significant to most people, but, but black hair is
such a sensitive topic and such a topic of strife in the black
household and and even in mixed households where one parent is
black and the other is not.
You know, it's like for years, we're just trying to shape
ourselves into the standard of beauty that we, that we are
exposed to. And so when I came to the point where, you know what, my
hair isn't ugly, it's, it's just African, it's just African. It's,
it's not ugly, it's just African, you know, and and that's, that's
like, I just, I remember that day when I decided, no more, no more
chemical relaxers,
no more flat irons, no more, any of that. I'm just going to,
I'm just going to be happy with the hair that Allah granted me as
as, as a woman, Alhamdulillah, like that's my Zina. You know? I.
That's That's my beauty as as as a woman. And one thing that I wanted
to point out was
a lot of a lot of girls, and I see this still happening till today,
when they when they finally are awakened to their natural beauty
as a black woman,
sometimes they react in ways that are not,
are not loved by ALLAH SubhanA like you know, it's a trauma
response, really, but I don't want to excuse the disobedience to
Allah. So what happens is, like some Muslim girls, I've seen it
black Muslim girls, they decide, finally they feel proud of what
how they look. And for for so many decades, they've been they've been
told that they they're ugly. They take off their hijab, right? And I
remember that moment where I finally felt beautiful as a as a
black woman. I was like, I can't show it off to anybody, but I
don't want to begin this, this journey of self love with
disobedience to Allah, right? That's something that like, that
really like, was really important for me to to
to understand inside of myself, like, no matter how, no matter
where this healing journey goes, if it takes me to a point where
I'm starting to go against the word of Allah and his razor, then
I don't need it. And it's not good for me. It's not healing. So
that's something that like
I I hope my black brothers and sisters, they,
they understand this. They because we, like I said,
there is a lot of anti blackness, especially in the Muslim
community, a lot of it and and it makes you feel
a hatred in your heart, just for Allah alim. It makes you feel
hatred in your heart, and it makes you feel jaded towards the
community. But it's very important that we don't take our healing as
a justification to abandon the word of Allah and the Sunnah of
rasulallah. It's so, so important
like so that's that's one thing like that i i keep in mind as I go
through this journey and as I continue to teach my children
about
our people and our history, whatever happens, you always stay
on the on the path of Allah, no matter what, no matter how hurt,
no matter how painful it is, you stay on that path. And
that's just, I don't know
so panel,
yeah,
I'm at a loss for words for a minute, but
thank you so much.
You know, addressing these, these very real, very tangible pieces of
your identity, which are different from my identity, are very helpful
and healing. People who a identify with it, with you or like me, can
come to a place of allyship, Inshallah,
Muslim community and the trauma and the pain. Can you share with
us
how you navigate this where people, especially wearing the you
you were in a club and someone might not know how to react in the
as in a hub in and of itself, in the community. Yeah, that's,
that's a whole nother struggle. I it also perhaps made people
choose a wording not have chosen had they
felt like they could perceive you in a different way. Oh,
absolutely, absolutely. So, you know, just for the the benefit of
the audience, I am, my mother is yemenia, and my father is African
American. And so I navigate the world through these two
identities. Alhamdulillah, and it's not, it's never like half and
half. I feel like, sometimes I feel more black and sometimes I
feel more Yemeni. It's, it's, it's interchangeable, and it really
depends on situation. But Annie, of course, this is something that
has been
such a source of confusion for me, because sometimes I'm around black
people, and they don't know I'm black, and they just, you know,
they perceive me in in the way a black person would perceive a
person, and that you are a threat because they have a history of
being belittled. Mm.
And discriminated against by out of people. It's very it's very
well known. I mean, the out of communities sometimes won't admit
to it. It's very hard to acknowledge that sort of pain that
you inflict on others. But it's there. It's there. And then
sometimes I'm in Arab circles, and they don't know I'm black. And now
I have another issue where, you know, I would hear things being
said about black people,
and I'm in the audience. I'm in that company, and I have two
options. I either react as if I didn't hear it, or I say something
and and invite, you know, open this can of worms now where I have
to talk about how this is racist, and Yani Allah doesn't is it
doesn't condone this type of speech and all of this stuff. So
it's like,
it's like, always having to choose, you know, what am I going
to do? What should I should I engage? Or should I not engage?
It's,
it's very confusing. So kind of, but one thing like, I do try my my
best to,
I do try my best to basically
Think, think about my own, like peace, my own inner, inner peace,
because I can't, I can't change everybody, and I can't do the work
all on my own. Everybody has to come to that conclusion on their
own, right? So, like, you know, black people, they they have to
realize Black doesn't always look the same, you know, like, I'm
black, but I don't look the same as everybody else. And out of
people, they have to get over their anti racism. I mean, they
have to get over their anti blackness. I mean, because, you
know, even if a black person is not there, why are you saying
these things? Why are you thinking these things? Right?
And especially as a Muslim,
you are at risk of
corrupting your heart and corrupting your soul with that
kind of arrogance, SubhanAllah. So did. It froze for a second wave.
Yeah. I Yeah. I froze a little bit.
So like, one thing that I just
like, I just wish my, my other brothers and sisters would would
heed and would listen to, is that
kid or arrogance is a form of
of of shk, according to, you know, what we learned in the deen
and shirk is the worst, the worst crime committed that a Muslim can
commit, but also it's like
it's dangerous in a way that I can't really describe with words,
because it's insidious and it takes place in the heart. And
it's, it doesn't leave unless you do something about it. Unless you
do, you act something about it. You can't just think to yourself,
black people are not bad. You can't do that. It's, it doesn't
work like that. You have to like really. You have to actively do
something to eradicate this disease inside of your soul, you
know. And like I talk, I talk about this sometimes, like, as
someone who is both both Arab and black, I can, I can recognize the
arrogance that that, you know, my people have. My other people have,
and I can also recognize the internalized anti blackness that
black people have, which is so hard to eradicate. You're you're
black, and you're trying to unlearn anti blackness. That's
hard. So I can't imagine someone who isn't even black trying to
eradicate anti blackness from their heart. That is a it's a
tremendous feat. It's a tremendous feat because it's so embedded and
ingrained in our society. It's systemic
in a way that, like
all I can call it, is that it's such a great fitna. It's such a
great fitna. Because it's not. It's not only about a fitna to for
black people. It's a fitna for everybody. Because unless, unless
something happens, and unless we do something to eradicate it, you
don't want to die in a state of being arrogant or like in a state
of having these sort of feelings towards another human being.
Because, you know, we already know what Rasul saw them. He said that
if you have an Adam's worth or a muscles mustard seeds worth of
arrogance in your heart, you know you won't enter paradise. So like
for me, when I talk about these things, I talk about it from a
place of.
A deep concern for my for the Ummah, deep, deep concern because
rasulallah, he was Arab, and
the Quran was revealed in the Arabic language. And at the time,
the people of the Arabian Peninsula. They were,
they were basically drowning in in tribalism, and whatever you want
to call it nationalism. They didn't have nations, but they had,
they had very deep seated tribalism, which caused them to
to kill each other and to, you know, do horrible things to each
other. And for me, I just feel like, okay,
it's been over 1000 years later. Like, where are we now? Like,
right? Can we? Can we evolve? Can we get past this now
Subhanallah, like it was before it was, you know, Arab against Harab.
And now it's like, everyone against everybody, everyone,
everybody against everybody. Um, you know, SubhanAllah. Now you you
have a whole, full fledged slave trade in Libya, and that's
something that, like, you know, not a lot of people are talking
about, a lot of people are aware of, but it's like, it's just so
overwhelming to think of, because when we think of slavery, we
automatically think of, you know, chattel slavery from the
transatlantic slave trade and like that was probably like the most
horrific form of oppression that has taken place in modern history.
So like for me, I automatically shut it out when I see that kind
of news. I can't, you can't process, I can't handle it because
to think of that happening right now, still, you know, still,
like, and in a Muslim nation, right? Like,
how, how. How is this happening? Yeah, I mean SubhanAllah.
But one of the things that
has always been a source of comfort for me through all of all
the injustices that happen in the world is going back to the book of
Allah and also reflecting on his names and attributes Asmaa Allah
has now,
because they are such a comfort. You know, we take comfort in the
name of Rahman, the Most Merciful of Rahim, the Bestower of mercy.
We take comfort in names like a laplif, the gentle and what do the
most, loving
the light. But I also take comfort in names like
like dun Dukan as using them to come the Avenger and Al hakam the
ultimate judge, Al AZ the most, just a Shaheed, the ever
witnessing. He sees everything, and he knows everything, and he
hears everything. There's nothing that is happening in this
universe, let alone on planet Earth, that that Allah is unaware
of. And so like
watching all of this injustice, it can harden the heart. It can
desensitize the heart.
But it's so important to hold on to the book of Allah and to
continue to understand who Allah is really like that's that's the
that's the essence of faith. Because I feel like, if I came
upon this awakening, as, as you say, like this re education before
having established a love and understanding of a law,
that would have been really bad for me, because kind of low, like
I said, some people, they react in a way that is very displeasing to
Allah. They react with kufr. Well, like they I, I've read about so
many black people who have apostated Because they they feel
like, you know,
this is the religion of the Arab you know, this is the, this is,
this is the religion of the slavers, they say, and I And
subhanAllah. This is like our, our Salah Salam was sent as Rahman. I
mean, he wasn't sent to just the Arab and even though he was
Arabic, he didn't behave as someone who was
above it all, or, or, or, or special because he was Arabic, he
was special because he was the best human being period
SubhanAllah. So, like,
that's like, that's something that I,
I really hope that.
My community, both communities, both communities can heal from
because it's just like
our Ummah has so much work to do, and we are stuck,
uh, we're we're regressing,
and we're not developing the way that we're supposed to be in the
in the speed that we're supposed to be, because we're stuck with
this stuff, right? Racism, really,
like, it is so pathetic to me. Like, can we get back to, like,
developing the cure for cancer or something, like, Can we do
something about hunger? And, yeah, any racism, really, that's, that's
the thing that we're stuck on. So that's the thing that, like,
really, it frustrates me, because, like, get over it. Get over it.
Human beings, we have work to do
and and, like, we know that
the last hour is very close. Everybody feels it. Everybody
feels it. You watch the news. You are aware of current events. You
feel that the end times are here. You feel it. But and you know
about the fitna of a dajjal, which is said to be the greatest fitna
that human beings will ever face in the history of any time.
But we can't get over the thickness of racism, really,
right? Like, you know, it just, it just astounds me, which astounds
me and, and one of the things that, like,
I have to bring this up because it's been in my mind for a long
time, one of the things that I remember thinking in the wake of
George Floyd
and everything that happened after that, and the response from the
Muslim community in like, trying to educate the Muslim community
about the great black people in our in our history, like the Great
had the scene and scholars, and there's great people, no doubt, no
doubt. But I felt like that was so
misguided. Mm, because what was happening was we were, we were
trying to place black people on a pedestal, like, look, black people
could be good too, you know.
And that was something that, like, just killed me. It killed me.
Because, why? Why do we have to,
I lost the word basically, why do we have to make black people seem
like angels and like heroes in order for us to to give them just
basic respect and like decency, right
as Annie, like, you know, just the whole, the whole entire thing,
some people were just questioning, like, why are we upset over George
Floyd, you know? Like, yeah, he was, like, you know, they were,
they were just saying, like, what, what did he do to earn our,
our outrage and stuff, it was because he was a human being. Yes,
he was a human being, period. And he, like
Allah says in the Quran so many times, like the the sake, the
sanctity of the humanness, like the the soul of the human being,
and to take a soul without justification is so wrong. So like
for me to have to hear people
tokenize Bilal and our great scholars, you know, and great
people in our history, like Mansa, Musa and and all of these people
and najashi, all of these amazing uh, pillars in our history. It was
like, Y'all are missing the point, right, right? There's a big
concept of tokenization in our community, where we point to like,
five figures that we know, and then, yep, look, there's no racism
in Islam and then rahimahola. But how much that is part of our how
much of that goes beyond just tokenizing,
and it's so belittling. So it is belittling. It is belittling
because, like, you know, anybody,
anybody sees, like,
a black person doing like, the most basic thing, it's like, wow,
you know, that's amazing. Like, they, they survived slavery and
they managed to become great. It's like, we didn't manage to become
great. We were always great. You great.
We were always great. That greatness was was stolen from us.
Yes, was stolen from us. Yes, like SubhanAllah. And one of the things
that really like, I don't know if other Muslims feel this way, but
maybe, maybe Black Muslims will relate to.
Is that there's a deep
sorrow and emptiness in not knowing our lineage,
you know. And that's something like,
you know, when we're so like, when we're when we're made fun of, or,
like, you know, belittled because of our culture
or the way that we speak or the way that we interact with each
other, it's like,
what do you want from us? We were stolen. Our our forefathers were
stolen, our foremothers were stolen. We cultivated this culture
that we have here in the Americas, and as long as we're not doing
anything haram, it should be it should be celebrated. It should be
encouraged, because we don't have the lineage like Allah. He was
very clear in how we interact with the orphans and those that we
adopt, the Abba Akasa, in the law, Allah says, Don't, don't let them
adopt your your your last names or your surnames. Call them according
to their fathers. That is what is. You know the best you know with
Allah. But we don't even know our, our tribal names. We don't even
know our our father's names. You know, our father's names are the
names of of our white kidnappers and so like, you know, these are
the things that
I feel like when
the rest of the community, they are critical. They're critical of
the Black Muslim community and how things have gone like I'm talking
about since, since the Civil civil rights movement until now. I
They're, they're not, they're not,
they're not looking at it from a very nuanced perspective, right,
right? It's, it's so much more complex than than they're giving
us credit for, right? Subhanallah, and
yeah, I just,
I just rattled on for 37 minutes to Panama, but yeah,
rattled on for 37
honoring with being so you're, you're you're taking the time.
You're being vulnerable, and you're educating when it's not
even your place to educate. So thank you so much.
Like I said, like I said before, I just come, I come from a place of
deep concern, very deep concern, for our people and for our Ummah,
and especially because I do want to see better for our next
generation, inshallah. And I do have hope. I do have hope. I'm not
like 100% like pessimistic, even though sometimes I do come across
that way,
social media and stuff, I think I do.
Everyone here knows, but
Layla is actually a bit of a star. I'm not a star.
Talks about these issues, and I think it's really important
because, like, when you say, I rant a little bit, or I come off
pessimistic, like, No, you are actually addressing issues, the
way that people feel them and and the way that people are not
acknowledging them at times. So I think that's a very huge for for
for the people in our community who have the hurt, but also for
people who are looking for how to who are looking for the language
on how to address these you're giving people language. I think
that's very Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah. And I want to
acknowledge that I'm talking from a place of extreme privilege,
because I am in the black community, considered a light
skinned black person. I don't, I don't experience the extreme
oppression of being a dark skinned woman, because that is a type of
hatred that is just I've never seen anything like it before, and
I haven't experienced it. I haven't experienced it, but it's
the most
insidious and most vile, the most vile type of hatred I had ever
seen in my life for just skin color me like I said, It's so
pathetic. Why? But um, like I said, I'm, I'm for all of my black
brothers and sisters who are, who are watching like I do, come from
a place of privilege being that I am considered light skin and that
I am Arabic, I am Arabia at the end of the day. So
while I do try to
call out my people, though, because I know things,
I feel I know things about the community that
none out of black people don't and and they I try my best to to come
to their
it's a come not not to like I
don't want.
To, I don't like to make it sound like I have some sort of like
savior complex or anything. But if I hear anything wrong being said
about my black brothers and sisters, I don't hesitate to
embarrass a person. Basically, that's the way that I feel is the
only it's only way effective. I know, you know, a lot of people
talk about calling in and private, privately saying things, but when
some someone is saying something
that has been
systematically like any ingrained in our society, and that you know
now better, like you now know better. So if you don't change,
then you deserve to be embarrassed. Sorry, if you don't
change, you deserve to be humiliated. That's that's the way
I feel. That's the way I feel, because we live in the in the era
of the internet and social media, if you don't know things, it's
because you're not looking.
You're not looking so that's, I know it's very like
confrontational and and, you know, some people might think like, you
know, I'm I'm looking for conflict. I'm actually very non
confrontational person. I'm an introvert. I hate fighting. I like
the peace. I don't like to start things with people, but there
are certain types of injustices that I just can't stomach. Yeah, I
can't stomach it. Sometimes I really can't. Public
accountability at times is the only way in which people will
think twice, because even if they're not going to themselves,
at least before being put in a position you might be embarrassed
that again, right, right, right, exactly. That's exactly what I'm
thinking, and especially if they're a person of influence,
right? You don't have an excuse, no, you just don't none, yeah,
and, you know, I do talk about, you know, issues pertaining to the
black struggle a lot, but
if you follow this account, I do like to highlight the struggles of
indigenous people as well, because I feel like it's so so critical as
Muslim people who believe in Justice and who continue to fight
for indigenous rights overseas, right to fight for indigenous
rights here in the land that we are currently living in, residing
in, we have, we have, you know, a system that is occupying land
right now, right that we live in and that we consume from. So like,
you know, I do take the time I try to learn as much as I can. I don't
know everything about about this struggle, even though my family
have, they've told us that we have indigenous blood, but we don't
know things because, you know, our family tree is just
it's a mess. It's a mess. On the black side, we don't know things
Subhanallah, but they but even if I was not
aware of any indigenous lineage, I still think as Muslims, it's it's
a must.
As a Muslim,
yeah, it's a must, because these people have been disenfranchised,
and their land has been stolen, and they are the only ones in this
country who actually care about the environment. They are the only
ones. And so as a Muslim, I mean, we're told not to leave EDA like,
not to leave anything that is harmful in the in the Tariq, in
the way, and then you have, you know, you see how it is now,
pollution and everything. These are the only people fighting for
our right to clean water, and for, you know, Holding, holding big
corporations accountable.
And I just feel like we Muslims, we should be on that front. We
should be on that front. Why are they doing it by themselves, you
know? And why aren't we amplifying their voices? Subhanallah, so
that's something that I also, I'm very like,
insistent about, because it's important. It's really critical.
You've mentioned before that you you, you've mentioned father
seeing Malcolm X when he was a child on the street, Rahima hula,
and even about how as Muslims, we have a responsibility to to the
environment, to the world, to other communities,
and how our own community. We take some Malcolm X, or he will not,
and we talk about him as great figure, but we're not practicing
the the the ideals, is not the right word, not practicing land
that he that we quote talking about.
Right, right, right. What would you recommend for someone who is
approaching the Quran? Can you recite some verses that talk about
what our role is as a community in terms of how we should be
all of these different types of very, very critical issues that we
should be participating in absolutely inshallah.
It's like
the one thing that I think of when I think of our beloved black
American Prince Malcolm X Allah, I think of how he was
of ullul Al Bab.
He was of someone who used his critical thought. He used the
facilities that ALLAH blessed him with and blessed all of us with.
He was not like more intelligent than the rest of us, but he used
it. He used it to think beyond what he was told, you know,
you know, like the most amazing story was when he went to Mecca
and he he realized that Islam was the solution to everything, that
everything, not only racism, but But literally everything, our,
our,
our religion, provides us with with a book that has the answers
for everything, and we take that for granted. You know,
that's what like that like in sort slot. Whenever I read it, I do
think about that like it says,
now
he,
he revealed to us a book that is blessed and so that we may reflect
on it and on its ayat. And so that ulu Al Bab, those with
good thinking and those with brains can can reflect on it. And
so,
like, I just feel like, as
as people who have been born to Islam, I've been, I was born to
Islam. And I feel like I can't really like speak to the to the
Revert story, but being the daughter of a revert, I think I
can kind of like picture it a little bit
just
how much thought has to go into to really admitting to yourself that
Islam is the right way and that Allah is the true God. It really
needs a lot of humility and and critical thought, because Islam is
a logical religion. It's not something that we,
you know, we're just, we're we're just parrots, like we just, you
know, repeat what we are what we hear. It's so logical, and it
makes sense. And so Subhanallah, that's something that my father,
he said, when he was looking for a religion. He grew up Christian. He
was looking for a religion, though, because that wasn't
answering something inside of him.
He studied many religions, Judaism, Buddhism, all of these
religions. And then, you know, subhanAllah, my uncle, was the one
who gifted him a Quran when he visited Morocco, and then he
decided to take his own trip to Africa, and there he embraced
Islam amongst the people who looked like him, SubhanAllah. And
so that's why, like, another thing that we mentioned, is sometimes,
you know, feeling that, Hua, that, um, that brotherhood with with
people who understand you culturally. It does, it does
bolster, once a man, some at times, you know, I'm not saying
all the time, but at times, it does help. You know when,
especially when that person has felt isolated for a long time. You
know, so Subhanallah, that's something.
It gives me hope. Because hope is not lost on people, if they only
use their brains. SubhanAllah.
But I told you that I have some ayat from sort of fusulat,
going back to the message that I said in the beginning of this live
where
I think it's important for us to hold on very tightly to the rope
of Allah, no matter our trauma and no matter our hurt,
we use that hurt to we Use that hurt to channel our iman and our,
our, our bond to Allah. Just like, yeah, salam, when he said in the
mouth, help
me out. Mariam, the the AYA source, use of in the mash gubani
in Allah. Like I, I complain.
And I tell all of my sorrows to Allah, you know. So that's one
thing that I hope that,
like my people, they understand, because no matter how hard it gets
and how like angry and sorrowful you feel about the treatment that
you've that you've been subject to from from your own people, from
the Muslims, you have to hold on to Allah. You have to hold on to
the hope of Allah and to the Promise of Allah for justice.
That's so important. So I'll just recite some Ayas From
swords
inshallah.
Master, Calm,
Bin, Jan AMA?
Wala, Kum fi ha Mata he
mated down
New Zealand.
Woman San ka Lam,
has
an ability.
You mean,
the
1
million
Fiji,
Those Ayat are so powerful, and especially after this
conversation, just talking about the angels being to give you this
comfort and this relief and glad tidings.
Subhan Allah, it fabulous. It's fabulous.
Subhan Allah is just,
how do you translate that?
It's like
push. I struggle to translate it because it doesn't the English
does not do it justice.
Well, give
push forward with good with what is better,
which is good,
right?
Would that be a good translation, or your voice cut out? Can you say
it again? Oh, you I cut up a little
bit. Yeah. Strive for with that which is good. Thank you so how?
Yeah. Subhanallah,
Allah, thank you so much for sharing that with us. We better
yes. Yes. Mashallah,
it was so beautiful your recitation, and more importantly,
for you to share this conversation and tell us about how the Quran
source of healing that regards the type of abuse or trauma or pain
that we've experienced, even if it's on the tongues of the people.
That's not the message Quran itself, and we can find healing in
it. Absolutely, it's my biggest source of comfort every day.
Hmm, every single day I don't know what I would be or who I would be
without Al Quran. Yes, I can't imagine a life without it. And
that's why, like I I become so, um,
so distraught, because I feel like if, if, if black people found
Islam
like everything, like nothing else would matter, nothing else would
matter. I think they have. Our people have suffered so much, and
Islam has the comfort and the wisdom to grant them their peace.
That's something that I feel really like I, I hope that more,
more and more come to Islam, Inshallah, in Allah. And you know,
from someone who's not a black Muslim, that that when someone who
is black finds that peace and healing in Islam, that myself,
people who are not Black can actually reflect messages and
create communities. Absolutely, absolutely. It's just so
incredibly
infuriating and painful to witness, what
to hear, to hear about what it's like to be a black Muslim woman in
our community,
and
absolutely get you having this conversation with me and sharing
with us, is that the last night Mariam, for you know, offering you
this platform and for sharing it with what they do, I'm so grateful
humbled that you would think about such such a personal issue on a
public space, And you do it powerfully in your Tiktok video.
Actually, before we give your information, how people connect
with you? Can you end with a job?
Yes, Inshallah, I have a job for everyone in English so that
everyone can comprehend what I'm saying. Oh, important. I really
appreciate that you were intentional, because I've been so
many jobs and Alhamdulillah, now I speak Arabic, but before I didn't,
and people would be like resetting Jaya for like 10 minutes, and I
gonna sing, but I know, I know.
Yes, thank you. Go ahead. You're welcome.
Oh Allah. We praise you, and we rely on you, and we ask you for
guidance. We ask your forgiveness, and we repent to you, and we
attribute all that is good to you. We thank you, and we never
disbelieve in you, and we reject and extract anyone who abandons
you. Oh, Allah, send your salutations and peace upon our
beloved prophet, Muhammad and upon the family of Muhammad, as you
have saluted and granted peace to Abraham and the family of Abraham.
Indeed, you are the most praiseworthy and most honorable.
Oh Allah. Send your blessings upon our beloved Prophet Muhammad and
upon the family of Muhammad, as you have blessed Abraham and the
family of Abraham. Indeed, you are the most praiseworthy, the most
honorable Oh Allah, penetrate our hearts with the light of the
Quran, with the blessings of Al Quran, with the wisdom of the
Quran and with the guiding compass of Al Quran. Oh Allah, grant us
the mercy through Al Quran. Establish it in establish it in
our hearts, as our leader, our light and our refuge. Oh Allah,
indeed, we are your slaves, Daughters of your male and female
slaves. Our existence is in your hand. Your judgment upon us is
assured, and your decree upon us is just we ask you with every name
that you have named yourself with or revealed in your book or taught
to any of your creation or kept with yourself in the knowledge of
the Unseen that is with you that you make the Quran the spring of
our hearts, the light of our chests, the banisher of our
sorrows and the reliever of our distress. Oh Allah, cause the
Quran to be a pleading witness for us and not a case against us on
the Day of Judgment. Oh Allah, grant us shifat From all that ails
us physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Oh
Allah, protect and preserve the hearts of the believers from doubt
and disbelief. Grant us steadfastness and conviction and
allow us not to deter from your straight path. Oh Allah, on this
blessed day of Friday, we ask you to rid us of the poisonous
diseases of racism, nationalism and tribalism. We ask you,
almighty Lord, strip us of any and all arrogance and superiority we
may hold in our hearts towards our fellow human beings. We ask you,
our Lord, to grant relief and victory to the oppressed those
whom we are aware of and those we are unaware of. We ask You, Lord
of the universe, to pour to pour upon your oppressed slaves your
infinite and boundless mercy and heal them from the wounds of
hatred, corruption and mistreatment.
We ask You, Allah, to bless our lovely go our lovely hostel,
Mariam Amen, and to grant her the piety, serenity, devoutness and
humility of her namesake. May our sister in Islam be elevated and
used to spread the love of your noble book to the very corners of
this planet. Oh, Allah, blessed her, preserve her and.
Her steadfastness in her endeavors to serve you. Ya Rabbi alamin and
Allah grant us goodness in this life and goodness in the
Hereafter, and spare us from the punishment of the fire. Ali, he
was happy. I was cinematira
in that and you and every single one of us and our loved ones that
was so kind of you to include my name in there. I have to I love
you so much for the sake of Allah, madam, and they always love you,
and I love my witness of Allah. I feel so grateful and so blessed
that Allah has honored me with no and within your friend, it is like
your friend I told I told everyone I could die happy now I'm getting
his friend
the other way around. Girl somehow.
Oh, nofiki enti, can you share with us all the different ways
that people can connect with you as we end
right? Okay, so the best way to connect with me is through this
account, time learning resources. And Al Kitab. Al Munir is my Quran
account where I share reflections on teaching and learning the
Quran, when I try to I will, yeah, on your igtv, I'll tag it
inshallah.
And then on tick tock, I go by Lulu, G bot, but
whatever.
But yeah, I'll tag that too if you want, I guess. And of course, you
can email me as well. I'll, I'll put, I'll put all those down
Inshallah, Inshallah,
uploaded on time.
Include all of her handles on there so you can follow her.
Inshallah. Inshallah, Layla, for the conversation. Thank you. Thank
you, Stella. Thank you so much. I love you for the sake of Allah.
May Allah love you, and I love you for the sake and may allow us to
be reflection of love in our communities. I mean, I mean the
allies to one another and all the things that we face. Thank you
everyone conversation in the comments. Yes, thank you. Thank
you everyone for joining. Thank you so much. Such a gift to have
all of you and such a have your voice that Aleah SubhanaHu, I'm
the
condition I