Lobna Mulla – Am I a jealous person

Lobna Mulla
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The speaker discusses how people can overcome their jealousy and feelings of sadness when they see something that is not their fault. They suggest making a "good deeds on the day of judgment" to stay focused on the situation and count your blessings. The speaker also advises people to avoid social media and stay focused on their situation.

AI: Summary ©

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			Am I really a jealous person?
		
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			Dear Osteda, it feels like everyone around me
		
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			is getting married, having kids or moving up
		
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			in their careers.
		
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			I'm struggling to be happy for them when
		
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			I'm just stuck where I am.
		
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			How do I get over my jealousy?
		
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			You know, first I think it's really important
		
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			to acknowledge that it is really tough to
		
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			be the only one amongst your friends or
		
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			sometimes your family and you're the only one
		
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			that's not getting married.
		
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			You're going to all these baby showers, you're
		
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			going to these weddings, you're watching people post
		
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			on Instagram they're bad, you know, they just
		
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			got promoted or they're getting into this program
		
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			and you really feel stuck.
		
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			That can be really hard.
		
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			So how do you prevent those feelings from
		
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			jealousy of entering your heart?
		
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			You love those people.
		
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			You don't want to feel angry towards them
		
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			or worse, angry towards Allah.
		
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			So what's the best thing to do?
		
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			The best thing to do, of course, when
		
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			you see something that somebody else has or
		
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			a situation that they're in and you wish
		
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			that you can be in that situation, make
		
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			dua for them.
		
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			Then make dua for yourself.
		
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			And I know you're saying, look, I've been
		
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			making dua the same one for years.
		
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			How can I keep still making dua?
		
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			Why should you still make dua?
		
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			Because Allah swt loves to hear when you're
		
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			repetitive in your duas.
		
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			He doesn't get tired of it.
		
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			You might be getting tired of it, but
		
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			he doesn't.
		
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			And when you acknowledge that this is a
		
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			test for you, that okay, the fact that
		
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			I want to have a partner and I
		
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			don't have a partner or I want to
		
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			have children and I don't have children or
		
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			I want to get a job and I
		
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			can't find a job.
		
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			When you find yourself those feelings of jealousy
		
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			creep into your heart, the best thing to
		
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			do is to stop and make dua for
		
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			that person.
		
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			Why?
		
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			Because when you make dua for somebody and
		
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			they're not around you, the angels will say
		
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			ameen to that dua for that person and
		
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			they will make a similar dua for you.
		
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			That's absolutely beautiful.
		
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			Every single time that you are making dua,
		
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			Allah swt is answering it for you, even
		
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			though you don't see it.
		
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			It may come to you now, it may
		
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			come to you in a different form, it
		
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			may come to you in the form of
		
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			good deeds on the day of judgment.
		
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			The other thing that you can do when
		
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			you're starting to feel overwhelmed with those feelings
		
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			of jealousy is to really count your blessings.
		
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			Say, you know, Alhamdulillah, I have time on
		
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			my hands.
		
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			I'm able to maybe start a project.
		
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			I'm able to better myself in a certain
		
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			way so that your mind doesn't go towards
		
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			the things that make you jealous.
		
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			And last but not least, sometimes it's really
		
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			helpful to stay away from social media for
		
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			a bit because those pictures, those lovey-dovey,
		
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			you know, handholdings, those announcements, all of those
		
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			things that you see, it can really become
		
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			like daggers into your heart every time you
		
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			see it.
		
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			And it doesn't mean you're a bad person.
		
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			It's normal.
		
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			You don't have those things and seeing them
		
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			over and over and over again and people
		
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			smiling and laughing, it really just sometimes adds
		
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			to your pain.
		
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			And you will find that you'll have more
		
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			time to count your blessings and feel better
		
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			about your situation, Inshallah.