Iqbal Gora – Friday Khutba 23-08-2024
AI: Summary ©
AI: Transcript ©
In
Alhamdulillah, when Abu lahimi, sayati, Amali na Udal falahade
Allah oshawala, ILAHA,
Illallah Hua sharikala, Oshawa, annamal,
a
he narrates in a particular story that once he was with an Absalom,
and while he's with the Prophet sallallahu, sallam, Abu Bakr
Assad, he approaches when Abu Bakr Sadiq approaches to Annabel Salem,
he uncovers his knee, and perhaps he was indicating by this that he
got into a fight. And he goes on, and he mentions that between me
and the son of Al Khattab, we had an issue, we had a quarrel, we had
a dispute, we got into an argument. Abu Bakr. Salihala Huan
after this, he goes on explaining the situation which took place
between himself and Amr, and he says that a situation occurred
between the two of us, and I cursed now Amr, when this happened
to him, he became upset, and then he walked off, and he stormed off
when he did this. Then I felt bad. I felt that I said something
wrong. I should not have said so I went and I sought an apology, or I
sought to apologize to Omar, hoping that he would forgive me.
So he goes and he approaches, and he goes towards Omar, trying to
chase him down, hoping that Omar would accept his apology. Omar,
khota, radiah Quran, he slams the door in the face of Abu Bakr as
Sadiq radila. Now, when this happens, Abu Bakr, he felt bad.
Number one, he felt bad about the fact that he cursed Omar to begin
with in this argument between the two of them. And number two, he
felt bad, and he felt that Omar didn't accept my apology. What is
going to be of my situation? So he complained to the Prophet
sallallahu, alayhi wa sallam, when in Nabil Salallahu sallam, he
hears this, he smiles, and he turns to Abu Bakr Sadiq Rahila
Huan, and he says, sayyahu, Phil Allahu, sayyalfiyyahu Allahu. He
repeats this three times that Allah subhanahu taala, he will
surely, he will certainly forgive you. Now, when you look at the
perspective of the story from that of ahmedab, he also felt that, you
know what, I should have accepted the apology that Abu Bakr offered,
and I also did something from my end, because rarely do we find a
conflict in which only one person is right. There are two sides to
every story. So he felt bad about the fact that he slammed the door
in his face. He also felt bad about the fact that when Abu Bakr
apologized, he refused to take that apology. So then he went to
the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, the Prophet sallallahu
Sallam when he sees RAM because um, prior to this, in fact, he was
looking around and going to the house of Abu Bakr Siddiq, looking
for where he is, and he was informed of the fact that he's not
home. He's with the Prophet sallallahu alayhi salam. Now when
he goes to an abhi salaam, he finds that the Prophet sallallahu
a Salam is angry and he's upset. Now when Abu Bakr he sees this, he
starts to defend Amr. He says that I was also wrong. He starts to
regret, and he says to say that I was the one that escalated more. I
was the one that in the situation did worse. The Prophet sallallahu,
Alam, he turns to Amr, and he says to AMR that Abu Bakr Al Sadiq, he
supported me when nobody else did with his self and with his money.
He supported me when everybody rejected me, including you. And
then he makes a famous statement where he says, Fahl antum tarikuli
sahabi, fahal antum tarikuli Sahabi. He repeats this twice,
will you not leave my companion alone? This hadith is found in the
Sahai habimam. Now, when you look at this hadith, there are number
of lessons that we can take. The first lesson that we derive from
this narration is the fact that the Prophet sallallahu sallam's
love for Abu Bakr, Sadiq surpassed that of everyone else. We
understand that when the NABI salaam was asked about those that
he loves the most, from among the men, he mentions number one, Abu
Bakr, number two, he mentions honor. But nonetheless, his love
of Abu Bakr was so high that despite the.
Fact that he says, Logan Umar, if there is to be a prophet after me,
would have been Omar. Nonetheless, his love of Abu Bakr Sadiq
surpassed other people of a level that cannot be comprehended. But
that is not the lesson that is the topic of today's hotba. The topic
of today's hotba is the fact that as human beings, one of the tests
that we have in this dunya is the issue of how we deal with others
and how we deal with conflict. And today's hotbah will discuss the
issue of conflict resolution. We find that in this story, we have
the best of people after the ambiya, Ala musalat was salam,
nonetheless, they got themselves into an issue, in issue and
situation, and it could be for you as a Muslim, you might have had an
issue with a brother in the parking lot. It might have been
that you as a Muslim, you had an issue with a brother in the
masjid. It might have been that you as a Muslim had an issue with
a co worker. It might have been that you as a Muslim had an issue
with your father or with your brother or with your children or
with your best friend. This is one of those issues that as human
beings, we need to deal with in this dunya before the ahiro,
we also find that often times, in situations, a person might also
have differences with their wives as well. And for the wives with
their husbands, they might have a situation in which there's a
conflict which takes place. And for this, remember another Hadith,
when Sahib musad was once asked, in the time of Marwan, one of the
later leaders of the Muslim ummah, about the most beloved name given
to Ali radilawan, the name Abu turab, the father of dust. He was
asked that, how did he receive this name? And he mentions the
fact that once the Prophet sallallahu, alas, he went to the
house of Ali radilawan and thaltima radila. Again, here we
see who Fauci, one of the four women who was given the glad
tidings of Jannah. Ali, radila, one, one of Allah. Ashna, these
people were given Jannah. Nonetheless, when the prophets of
Allah says that, where is the son of your uncle? Where is the son of
your uncle? Where is your cousin? Fauci, Murad, ILAHA, she says that
can be beni wabana, who she horaj That there was an issue between me
and him. He got angry and he left. And NaVi Salaam is then informed,
and he asks around, and he sees that Ali radila is informed of the
fact that he is in the masjid in Masjid Nabawi, and he goes there,
and he sees Ali Rawan on the ground sleeping with his shirt
uncovered. And then he sees that he is covered with dust. And he
tells and he dusts him off as a sort of consolation for him. And
he says, pumya about Rob stand up. Oh, father of dust. We might also
find a situation in which that is not simply a human being and
another human being. But rather it might be groups of Muslims, one
contingent of Muslims, against another contingent of Muslims. It
could also be that a certain group of Muslims, that he have a certain
interpretation of Islam, and another group of Muslims, they
have a slightly different interpretation of Islam within the
acceptable limits. And yet these groups of Muslims might find
themselves into conflict, as we see when the Prophet sallallahu
Sallam passed away. Then shortly thereafter, when when Othman is
murdered and married, the Battle of the Camel takes place. What do
we find in this situation? We find Ali radila, one of Allah Ashna,
and we find more obey Allah. And we find subway in RAM on the other
side, and they're fighting each other. And Allah mentions this in
the Quran when he says, When, for us, the hub, when groups of
Muslims fight each other, it's incumbent upon them to make Islam.
In the context of these verses, Allah Ali mentions this three
times, for us, the hubaina, Huma, make Isla and reconcile between
yourselves. The Prophet sallallahu alashi mentions in one narration
as well that among those things that this ummah will not be
safeguarded from is conflict from among ourselves. Now, what is the
reason for this and why is this so important? The reason why this is
so important is because of the fact that our entry into Jannah is
contingent upon the fact that we resolve issues with people that we
had in this dunya before we are allowed entry into Allah's
paradise. What is the proof of this? And Nabi Sallallahu alashi
mentions, in the last phase before a person gets to Jannah Allah, he
has a second bridge there. We all know of us, Sirat, but there's a
second bridge as well, and Nabi SallAllahu, sallam. What does he
say? He says either now for hobbi sulm, he
mentions in this narration that when the issue of hellfire has
been concluded, then a person would be imprisoned at a second
place called now, imagine this situation. We all know that life
is difficult. We all might have conflicts with others. We all have
to deal with the situation. We might.
Have health issues, we might have financial issues. All of this is
part and parcel of this life, as Allah says, wala qadah Insan, EFI
kebab, Allah created us in a state of difficulty now towards the end
of our life, what happens saturat al note and the Beast of Allah,
rasalam In this moment, although he was a Prophet, sallAllahu,
alayhi wa sallam, he is the prophet of Allah. And he takes a
vessel of water and he wipes it over his forehead, and he says,
Allah in nali, Moti, la satnarat, indeed, in the stupors of death,
indeed in death is a type of stupor and pain all of us will
face this without exception. We ask Allah to make this easy for
us. When he passed this stage, there's a squeezing of the grave.
The Prophet sallallahu, sallami said that every person will be
squeezed. And if there was anyone to be saved from the squeezing, it
would have been sad, the one for whom the Throne of Allah, shuk, if
he was squeezed, what about us? Then we have the resurrection.
Allah says either Salman, satarat, Wahid, Al kawaki,
skies will be split asunder. Then we find the planets, they will
fall apart. You will find that a person would be everything would
explode as well. The oceans would explode, and everyone would come
out of their grave. In this type of horror, Allah describes the
saying they Asmaa who ham Sina, 50,000 years long.
Sina al fasina, This alone should make us think he says about it. Yo
mana Abu sang come toriro, a day in which a person will be
frowning, a person would be frowning, a person would be in a
state of this extreme distress. You go through all of this. You go
through all of this. Then at a certain point, Allah, for the
disbeliever, this prayer, these individuals would be sent in
groups to jahannam. Was Jahannam asmaara, and their issue is
concluded once this happens. Now there are three groups of people
left. There are three groups of people left. Number one, you have
the sinful Muslim. Number two, you have the righteous Muslim. And
number three, you have the munafiqun. These three people will
be asked to cross a lot, which and Abu Salah Salem, he says,
ahadumina safe. Ahadumina safe, wa daumina Shara. It is one that is
sharper than a blade and thinner than a hair. And people would go
at varying speeds across a lot, some like a blink of an eye, some
like a fast horse. Other people would be crawling, other people
like the munafiqun, they would fall in in then munafiqun, if dark
and the sinful Muslim, would also fall in, because they will not
they will have to have some purification of their ill deeds
before they're eventually allowed entry into Jannah. The righteous,
righteous Muslim, through all of this, throughout 50,000 years, in
all of this pain they would be at Al qamtora. Now, when they are at
this stage, they can see their place in Jannah, and the Hadith
mentions they know their place in Jannah better than they know their
home in the dunya. What happens to us? We have a long day from work,
then at the end of the day, we had the intention to go shopping, and
we find ourselves on autopilot. Were at home. Why does this
happen? Because our homes are so engraved in us. This hadith
mentions, when you're at Torah, you will know your place in Jannah
better than you knew your home in the dunya. You can see it right
there in front of you, but you cannot enter until what happens
this hadith either now you're done from the issue of hellfire, then
Allah says that you're going to be at this place called Al qantara.
You're going to be at this second bridge by the call so nama. Valley
mechanics, being a humidunya, you need to alleviate this issue you
had with this other brother. Either you resolve it in this
life, or you're going to be stuck there and you have to deal with
this person. Sometimes he wants to avoid them. I don't want to see
them again. And you just avoid them. You don't make eye contact.
They die. You die, but your entry way into Jannah is contingent upon
this. What does Allah say in the Quran about the perfection of
Jannah? He says that when azaana, Matthews Allah, what you
will do in Jannah is he will * away any animosity, any
hatred that you had between yourself and another brother, and
this is from the perfection of Jannah. You will be reclining on
couches towards each other. This is from the perfection of Jannah.
Allah. Jannah is pure. You will not allow anyone to enter Jannah
until you have a pure and a clean heart. You can either do it here,
or you can trade the castles that you see there. You built for
yourself. You built for yourself, ahasu, Jannah by building a masjid
or by other, any other means, reciting ul ALLAH 10 times. You
see all of these. You can tell this person, forgive me, I'll give
you that. That will be the type of trading, but you cannot enter
until this issue is resolved. And this goes to show the importance
of this also. We all want Jannah in this dunya. We all want a nice
house with a nice lake behind it, with a huge mansion. We all want
this Jannat in tajriment har in this dunya. We can also build for
ourselves a house in in this dunya, or a Jannah for us in this
dunya through our thoughts when you have a grudge against someone
else.
This little, this hatred, this grudge, doesn't hurt them. This
person is living rent free in your head. It hurts you before it hurts
them. And the happiest people are the ones let let go of grudges.
Let's build for ourselves a house in Jannah in this particular way.
So this is the importance of how we need to understand this point,
that we need to have and resolve these issues before allowed entry
into Jannah in the last part of this khutbah and the second part
of the khutba. Let us discuss some ways that we can achieve this,
some practical steps by which we can achieve and become people that
don't have hatred number one. And in fact, how do we resolve
conflicts? What are some methodologies to resolve
conflicts? First, let us discuss, what should you do to not be one
who instigates conflict? And we'll mention three reasons, or three
things we can do. And number two, if conflict is instigated against
you, what are the steps you can take to ensure it does not go out
of control? We'll start with the first one. How do you become a
person that does not instigate conflict? The first step is to
think about this. Al Ghazali, Rahim Allah, one of the scholars
of Islam. He says, in one narration, something for us to
think about and ask yourself as a thought experiment. First, is it
possible for a person to backbite without saying anything? Is it
possible for you to backbite without saying anything? Al
Ghazali, he mentions, he says, suvan rebell, thinking negatively
of somebody else's backbiting, of the heart, all of our conflicts.
He started in our mind, we're driving somewhere, and that
conversation or that argument we had from someone, it comes into
our mind, and we start thinking, we start ruminating. And then this
turns into what watch our thoughts because our thoughts will become
our words. Watch your words because your words will become
your actions. Watch your actions because your actions will become
your habits. Watch your habits because your habits will become
your character. And watch your character, because your character
will eventually become your destiny. And Nabi SallAllahu, he
mentions in many Ahadith,
this thought, or the idea of watching and and Allah from his
mercy will not hold you to task until you actually say something.
But every single haram started from a thought Allah, what does he
say in the Quran? Yeah, the Roman. All you who believe abstain from
much suspicion in the bad of one some of these are sin, and they
will turn to sin. You are in your car, you have these thoughts. When
this happens, what should you do? What Imaan nakamina, shaytan Inez,
run faster as soon as you
can. He mentions, in one narration, he says that it's not
permissible for you to interpret the words of your brother in a
negative way. Sometimes you see somebody and automatically you
don't like them. You don't have a reason for doing so. It could be
that you send someone a message on WhatsApp, let's say, for example,
and you get two blue ticks so you know that they saw your message.
Then you start to make all types of accusations. This person is
lazy, doesn't want to respond. What's wrong with him? Each then
you will get Theo Mina one make an excuse for this person, as best as
you're able to do so, a Shafi raham Allah, one of the great
scholars of Islam. He mentions that towards the end of his life,
while he was sick, one of his students, a rabbi Abu saliman, he
came and he visited him, and he said to a Shafi, he said, Allahu,
darf, while a Shafi is sick, may Allah strengthen your weakness.
Now he had a slip of the tongue, and what he meant by this was, may
Allah strengthen you against your weakness. Sometimes you have a
slip of the tongue. Sometimes the words that we can say are can be
interpreted one of two ways. Ashay he responds by saying, if Allah
strengthens my weakness, I'm going to die. So Rabbi said, Iman, he
says that Wallahi, I only intended good by this. And sometimes we say
this to somebody else, and they insist on our initial statement,
their version and interpretation of what they what we said, or we
do the same, our version of how we understood it. Give the person
some slack. And if they defend themselves, allow it. Say, No
problem. ASHRAE said, even if that is what you intended, I would have
only taken the positive interpretation, that's the first
step. It's tennibukiro Mina bun number two be one that always says
that which is good, as Allah tells in the Quran, he says that
Wakulla, ibadi, yakulu Lati here ASAN say that which is the best.
Sometimes the tone that you use is more important than what you said.
How you say something is more important than what you said.
Every single Jum our do we say yaw and sadida be one that says
something sadida Be ready in hiraf, wala Raj, something clear
cut to the point something which, if you do it, you come, all of the
affairs in your life, in your relationship, are going to be
fixed if you do this. One thing about only saying that which is
good, or, as in the bisalami says, when someone, the one that is
quiet, is saved. Man, can you mean of Allah? He will, you will
khairan Abu asmaath, the one who believes in Allah in the last day,
say that which is good, or remain silent. Number three, the third
step of.
You should do is that if you are a person that said something wrong,
then there's a step that you need to take. Once a man came to the
Prophet sallallahu Alam, and he says that Alim niwajis, he said,
Teach me something, but make it short and concise. And Nabil Allah
Salim, he said, let a call them. Vikalamin, tadi rumin. Don't say
something. Going to have to apologize for later, because what
happens is, if you say something, you said something wrong, or you
said something and you need to apologize or retract it later on.
Now you need to deal with your ego. As human beings, we don't
like to apologize. It's something really hard for us, but if you
find yourself in this situation, actually go ahead and apologize.
It's not easy, especially for men, to say you're wrong when you know
you're wrong, you can't say because of your ego, and if you
said something and you have to retract, it's going to be hard for
you. What does the Prophet, sallAllahu sallami, tells us in
one Hadith, three things which seem to be a contradiction, but in
actuality, they are not. Number one, man sadaqah, when you give
charity, your money will not decrease. It seems it might, but
it actually, actuality, won't number two, waman Tawa, da alahi,
Rafa, the one who humbles himself for the sake of Allah. You
apologize. Allah is going to raise you in the eyes of people, and,
more importantly, in his eyes as well. We ask Allah for this.
Finally, let us discuss what we should do if conflict is now
instigated against us. It was not our fault. The person was wrong.
The first step is to be one that is forgiven, as we hear in the
last part of his Hadith of the third thing is Allahu, Abu Asmaa
Ali will
not increase a person, one who forgives, one who overlooks wala
Athena, Anath as Allah. Describes about a person who gets a Jannah,
who's with us out of the heavens and the earth is who a person who
overlooks the faults of others. When you have this quality of
overlooking, then you find that what's going to happen. You think
that if you overlook and you accept somebody else's apology,
I'll never accept his apology. He doesn't deserve me to accept his
apology. You think by having the situation, your ego's up here, and
you don't want your ego to get lowered you. You feel as though
it's going to decrease you in some way, so you can't do it. But in
actuality, what happens when you accept the apologies of others,
when you overlook the faults of others, when you don't insist on
getting every single part of your right? What happens is that your
honor increases in this dunya, and, more importantly, in the
akhira as well, that is the first step. The second step, if a person
finds themself and another person is instigating conflict against
you, the next step is, don't become defensive. When you find
relationship coaches from a secular, non Muslim standpoint,
they talk about the four horsemen in a relationship. These four
things will destroy your relationship. What are they or one
of one of them is, don't get defensive. Now, this is important.
In a number of Ahadith and Nabi Salah Salem. In many Ahadith, he
talks about the best words we can say, yad, yar, the Quran Allah. He
loves this. But in one narration, he talks about what he hates. In
the Abu Kalam or in the law ajuli Raju, lakula Ali can have *. You
tell your brother, fear Allah, what does he say back, no, you
fear Allah. Allah hates this. Take the advice, be humble, and Allah
will love you. In fact, if you say this in reverse, Allah Ali hates
this, but our ego, we like to argue. Waka Nilan, we have this
quality. We love to argue. Unfortunately, also, we find in
one narration, Abu Bakr Sadiq RAM. He was once with the Prophet
sallallahu, alayhi wa sallam. And while he's with the in the company
of the Prophet sallallahu, alas, a man. He is cursing him. He is
reviling him. He is saying all sorts of things to him. And he is
sitting down, and Abu Bakr Sadiq, he says nothing the Prophet
sallallahu sallam, he starts to smile. Then eventually Abu Bakr
Siddiq being a human being, the best of human beings, after the
prophets, yet, nonetheless, he was a human being. He couldn't take it
anymore, and he had to say something. Back when this
happened, the Prophet sallallahu sallam, he got up and he left. Abu
Bakr Sadiq, being deprived of the company of his best friend. He
went to the Prophet sallallahu sallam, and he said that, why did
you leave? And Nabi Salas said, while you were quiet, shayton was
defending you. Or while you were quiet, Na, shaytan, when you while
you're quiet, the angels were defending you. And the moment you
said something, Waka ash, shaytan, walam, Akun li ako aur, Oda, Ma,
Asheton, when you started to say something back, shaitan came, and
I do not sit with shaitan as for the reward of this. And Nabis,
Allah Salim what does he say? And as Jannah kalmiro, I will be a
guarantor. I will guarantee a person a house in Jannah for whom
that person who leaves argumentation, even though you're
right, we want to have the last say. We know we're right, leave
the argument for the sake of Allah, will get a house. In
Jannah, the prophet is guaranteeing for you Don't be one
that gets defensive. And finally, the last point is, don't escalate
and repel with what is better. What does Allah say in the Quran,
he says, Well, at this good and evil are not the same aid fare a
repel with that which is better for.
When you do this and there's an issue between yourself and another
brother, then you're going to find yourself to be friends at the end
of it. We all know a situation which we had an argument with
someone. The next time we're in a room with that person, we can't
make eye contact. He's there, we're here. We can't look at each
other. What happens? Sometime passes one person, he says, salam,
Alaikum. Salaam. Then next time, salaam alaikum, some small talk.
How's your family? How's your day of the person, same situation. Go
back and forth. What happens? You became friends because one person
you repelled with that which is better. What does Allah Ali say at
the end of this? He says, wama, you look Koha, Illa, Larina
sabaru, you can't do this unless you have patience. Wama, Ula,
Koha, Illa, do halved. Alim, the one who does this has a great he
has luck. He has he's a great fortune. From Allah, subhanho wa
Taala and the mufasarum, they say this fortune is a number, number
of things. One of them is happiness in his dunya and the
akhirah, if you have this quality within you, and Lu Han alim,
according to MUFA sirun, some of them, they say this is Jannah,
this quality of being one that repels with what is better. One of
the qualities is one of the what did you get out of this is Jannah.
And another final point related to this as well. And Nabi salami
says, Al mustaq ban Makala, Al Badi Malam Yat Dilma, that when
two people revile each other, the the sin is upon the one who
started, as long as the other person doesn't escalate. So, for
example, you said something rude to someone now they decided to
curse you. The other person curses your mother. The other person
punches him. The other person slashes his tires. The one that
escalates the sin is on that person. Leave the sin for the
other person and take a reward from Allah subhanhola, as in
ummah. We need unity. This unity starts from our brothers and our
sisters who are within our own inner circles. Allah says in the
Quran something that we need to remember of where our anger should
be directed to, to these dictators, to these people that
are committing genocide, the Prophet sallallahu, Sallam and
those that are with him. What does Allah say? Muhammadun, rasulallah,
the Muhammad is a messenger of Allah. Wanda in a mahu, Ashe Dawa
Ali kufar, these oppressors and tyrants. Our animosity and hatred
to should be towards them that fight us on account of our
religion, fight and kick us out of our homes and do this to our
brothers. But among ourselves, where is this compassion? We ask
Allah to make us from those that has this compassion. We ask Allah
to make us from those that is real. This hatred is removed from
our hearts in its entirety, so that we can enter into Jannah
without being stuck Alhamdulillah for a long period of time. We ask
Allah to make us from those who can lower our egos for the sake of
him and for the sake of our akhira and Our dunya Ada was still Muslim
at first.
Mustafa
so
Muhammadan, Abdullah Muhammad, WA Allah Ali,
Muhammad, Ali, Allah
mu,
I will
Carry on.
Allah,