Hosai Mojaddidi – Women in Islam Myths Versus Reality
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AI: Transcript ©
This is really, this is something I've put together for, you know,
for college students really, but I do feel that everything that I'm
about to present is so relevant given all that was discussed that
we're living in such contentious times, times where these topics
are so politicized, and I've worked with youth, I hear all
about it all the time from sisters and young girls that I work with.
They're very curious and confused about what Islam has to say about
a lot of topics that relate to women, but also just gender, this
concept of gender. So whatever conversations we can have around
this topic are so relevant, I want to really again, thank you, Mr.
Muhammad for being so thoughtful and you know, having the foresight
to put together such a wonderful presentation and then bringing it
to us. So may Allah bless you and of course, your beloved father.
And may Allah return you to our community again and again. And
again. This is just the beginning and shot love it.
humbler so with that said, this has worked for me too. Yeah, it
does. Okay, great. Thank you. Alright, so Bismillah let's
start do oh, do I do down? Okay. Oh, no, sorry. Okay. No,
no, you're, you're right, you were right. It's down tomorrow, I think
when I hit down at work. Okay. So the first thing I wanted to share
is actually a quote that was posted in The Daily Beast. And
this is just for us to really understand why we have to talk
about Women and Islam and really have be in control of the
narrative because this is the reality that we're up against,
right? Muslim women have been wrongly painted for decades in our
country, as universally oppressed, and silent. Partly that's because
of the outrageous Real Life policies of Muslim nations, like
Saudi Arabia, but also it's due to Hollywood feeding us a diet of
Muslim women depicted in movies and TV shows, as fearful, timid,
and covered in a burqa whose only sound is all the leading, you
know, this is the sound that women from different Arab countries make
when they're, you know, celebrating.
I'm sorry.
Yes, I'm not familiar with Okay, I'm gonna thank you for that. Yes.
So, you know, they themselves recognize that, you know, Muslim
women have been depicted wrongly for so long. And it's important
again, to depict or to, to help us to discern what what is true and
what isn't, and, and to address those myths. So let's first start
off with the facts, what we should know about Muslim women and this
is, across the board, men should know this women should know this
young girls should know this boys should knows we should have no
difference of opinion on these matters that Alhamdulillah Muslim
women absolutely have many rights in Islam. The fact that I'm
sitting up here is a proof of that the fact that there are so many
beautiful sisters here, sitting here all came with their own
agency, their own, you know, they were able to come here, it's a
proof of that. But there are many other proofs. Another fact is that
many Muslim women's rights are actually violated across the
world. And we have to be honest, we have to have honest
conversations around this, we can't just gloss over the
realities that our mothers, our grandmothers, and even women
today, of course, are dealing with in terms of the oppressive nature
of certain cultural beliefs, right, that perpetuate
misogynistic rules, customs, or unjust laws and policies, all of
which directly conflict with Islamic principles about women's
inherent values and rights. So we have to be clear that that's a
that's a truth. And then, and that Muslim women disproportionately
suffer more consequence consequences from Islamophobia
than Muslim men. And that's because we're more visibly most
Muslim right? People can see us so a man can has that privilege of
being able to move through society and nobody would know whether he's
Muslim or not. Because now for example, the beard is trending
right? There's a whole other it's what is it? The the, what is it
called? I forgotten now, but there's a whole movement, right?
Where that the hipster the hipster movement, right?
Like you. My name is Catherine. So there you go. So yeah, he could
get away with pretending to be just another hipster, millennial,
you know, Latino, getting, you know, following a trend, we don't
have that luxury work unless you know me certain sure you can style
your hijab differently. But most of the time people understand that
you are a Muslim, and that's your faith. So
and then the, you know, the other things that we also have to be
mindful of is again, the rights that the women have world, you
know, in Islam are not always given and they are violated, as we
mentioned. But let's talk about other things that, in my
experience, just hearing from women from hearing from young
girls, that they also feel is missing as a missing piece of the
conversation that we openly address that yes, there are, for
example, double standards, right. So there's a mistreatment that a
lot of young girls and women experienced due to the gender
disparity. So in households, you know, boys will for example,
will be given preferential treatment, they'll have more
opportunities, they'll be able to have more social mobility, less
household chores, right? Raise your hands, am I talking to two of
the girls? Right? All of this is a real, a lot of us experiences
growing up. And I could, you know, spend a lot of time telling you
about my chore list versus my brothers, which there was not
basically. But delayed curfews. Right, and then girls are also
held to a stricter code of conduct. So that's true, that's
just a real experience that a lot of Muslim women have. There has,
in some cases denied access to education, Islamic and or secular,
I've lived that reality. And I know others have as well. forced
marriages without their consent and prevention from divorce, lack
of employment opportunities, and or financial abuse from family
members, or spouse, or forced labor without compensation, lack
of basic civil liberties, or the right to participate in public or
social life force, cultural practices related to female
sexuality, like FGM, forced to jab or in a club, physical, mental,
emotional, or spiritual abuse from relatives, including parents,
siblings, spouses, extended relatives would go on and on.
These are the lived experiences of women. And this isn't, you know,
exclusive to Muslim women, but we have to be real, that these things
absolutely do occur. Now, with that said, we also have to
understand that Muslim women in the US are experiencing
unprecedented challenges, right? So when we look at the research
here, for example, 57, the majority of Muslim women versus
43% of men, Muslim men say that it's become more difficult to be
Muslim in the US in recent years, because we are bearing the burden,
right, we are the ones that are attacked. And I mean, I've had
I've written if you follow me on social media, plenty of Facebook
posts over the years about the different, you know, either micro
aggressions or actual attacks are perceived, you know, very, very, I
mean, clearly examples of Islamophobia towards myself, that
I've had to deal with, but I know many others who have had very
similar experiences. So that's one thing. And then 83% of Muslim
women versus 68%. Look at the numbers, look at the difference,
said that there was a lot of discrimination against Muslims,
because they're on the receiving end of that. And then 55% of
Muslim women versus 42% of men say that they've experienced at least
one of several specific types of anti Muslim discrimination. So
these are, again, we have to familiarize ourselves with this,
because we need to empathize. And also just have, again, honest
conversations around the experiences of Muslim women in the
world, and you're at home. Now,
to the real stuff, because this is what we have to do, we are again,
living in times where there's a lot of people want to speak on our
behalf. But it is so important for Muslim women to be empowered to
have their own voice and to basically take back the narrative,
right, so that we don't have people just using us, which is
what they're doing. In many cases, they use our, you know, our, our
status, right, as a marginalized community or as a member of
society that is often and in many cases, as we just read, sometimes
mistreated, so they will use that to their advantage. But it is it's
very important for us to have our own narrative and to assert our
own truth. So this is where you know, Marshall, again, in my mind,
this presentation was so comprehensive, but it's so
important for us to address what it means to be a woman not from
the lens of modernity and politics. But to go back to the
ultimate source, which is the Quran, and Allah subhanaw That
tells us right, what I said.
And the male is not like the female. And I think that wording
is so beautiful, right? Because, you know, just I mean, of course,
Allah knows, in his own wisdom, the way that it was phrased what
the implicit implication is, but I do think that there's something
beautiful about it, that says that there are unique traits, right,
which again, you
mentioned that we have to honor and to, you know, fall into this,
you know, idea that we should all just be the same and to negate
those beautiful differences is again, against what we are taught.
And then again, everything we've created pairs that you may
remember the Grace of Allah meaning another powerful voice,
verse that reminds us that there is a binary, right, and we are
living in a time where this idea of a binary is completely being
erased. And you know, something that should comes a mentioned,
which I think is really we have to keep in mind that when you affirm
this idea that everything is fluid, and that there's no you
know, that there is no binary and that you allow for that. Who is
the only non binary?
Right, who's the only non binary? Allah subhanaw taala. So we have
to be very careful to fall into that same language, right? We
believe in a binary this is absolutely fact. We believe in
that. And the idea that someone can be non binary or that we don't
need to, we need to reject these notions is again, akin to allowing
for people
To define themselves on the same level or as as though they are
like godlike. And that is not our worldview, right? We reject that.
And so there, Islam, again, the framing around men and women is
complimentary, it's not contentious, but we're living in a
time where it's, we're being pushed into that direction to just
see each other as enemies. There's this constant power grab between
us, that we should feel threatened as women, by men and men should
feel threatened by women. And that's why we have all these
movements. Now we have in cells and red pill, then we have
feminists and others that are, you know, going in the direction
where, you know, again, it's just constant infighting and looking at
each other as enemies. And that is the complete opposite message of
our faith, which is we are a complement to each other. And we
don't need to fight because of him that everything is already defined
for us as again, Imam Muhammad mentioned, you know, we
definitions are important. And when you live in a world or in a
time, where you know, everything's trying is being forcibly
redefined, or deconstructed, then that's when you get all this
chaos. But our definitions are very clear around these things. So
we have to restore that gender balance. And so we go back to, you
know, are the Quran and the Hadith, our sacred texts to look
at what how do we restore the balance? Well, here, almost father
reminds us right, that we are honored by Him, He is the one
who's honoring us, never will I allow the loss, the loss of the
work of any worker amongst you, male or female, you are of one
another. So he is, you know, giving us, you know, precedent. I
mean, he's mentioning both of us in this verse to say that your the
value of what you bring is the same. There's no difference,
right? That one is not preferred over the other. And then and for
women are rights over men similar to those of men or women, this is
real equity. This is the equity that we should look to, right. So
we're not we shouldn't look to lip service equity, we should look to
a real equity This is it. Surely the men who submitted the women
who submit and the fact that I mean this verse, and this is the
verse that I thought you were asking about with OMA Salama,
initially, this verse also right, this idea of
you know, the men and the women being being
mentioned in the same context repeatedly repeatedly, it's an
honor for us as women and we should note that because others
are noting it and here at the bottom, I just have a little fun
fact that might again, just inshallah warm your heart to see
that Allah's father is always trying to remind us right that
there's no competition here, Rachel and Almara, both which mean
men and women are mentioned each 24 times in the Quran, something
that you know, again, little factoid. Yeah, this is from Dr.
Celine Ibrahim in her book, the women in gender in the Quran. So,
Marshall ended, there are 34 eyes in the Quran, where women are
speaking directly. I mean, there's just so many other beautiful, you
know, facts and says truths, that, that prove that we are in fact
honored by God. And if you have always found that your Creator
honoring you, you don't need to look to anyone else for
validation, or definitions about who you are. And so this fact that
the women are prioritized and given this honor, what is known
noted by people like Leslie Hazleton, who actually observed
that the Bible is exclusively and again, Dr. Alley can speak more to
this, addressing men are using the second and third person masculine,
but the Quran actually includes women. And this is a distinction
that we have to know so that when we're in any way, you know, put in
a position where we feel like we're on the defensive, these are
the types of responses that you can just immediately shut down
anybody who comes and, you know, tries to make a case that women
are don't have rights in Islam. No, we absolutely do. And, you
know, the problem is, like I said, I'm right, honored by the prophet
was and he said, What and for all of the parents in here, right,
that what a what an incredible I mean, I look at what I think of
this, I have two sons. So but I still I'm my father, Elijah, who
he had three daughters. So inshallah I always look to this
hadith as inshallah hope that it hopefully that we, you know, we do
our part to, to serve Him and to continue to do good. So then
inshallah he can reap the benefits of raising us because this is such
a beautiful Hadith, whoever has three daughters, and he cares for
them, He is merciful to them, and he closed them in Paradise is
certainly required for him. And then, you know, again, this
exchange, the problems I was having with the Sahaba and he
asks, or someone asked, you know, from the Companions, what if the
person only has to, he said, even to some people thought that the if
they had said to him one of the process and would also have
affirmed that? Yes. If you raised one daughter and you, you know,
did your best and inshallah that would be your ticket to Jenna. I
don't know of a hadith where he talks.
You know, again, Subhan Allah, what a gift that we've been left,
right, and his consistent record again for advocating for women.
The first issue is, of course that we know that he came to
immediately right
to Kate was a female infanticide. And then by the cold by the end of
his life and the last sermon, what was he addressing the men, he
said, What take care of the women take care of the women. So this
is, I mean, there's so many proofs, we're just again
scratching the surface. But we want to leave you with that
confidence that we don't have to look to anything outside of our
own faith, to know where we stand and what our definitions are. It's
all there. And it is the best, there's nothing that you can find
that will come even close to what Islam teaches in terms of the
fairness, the beauty of both the male and the female.
And then again, he I enjoy you to treat women kindly for their your
partners, and committed helpers. odia. Again, the same advice that
we heard, I mean, the same message about being complimentary, the
right to an education, we should know this, because now for
example, I mean, I'm from Atlanta son born there, I have not been
back. But it's certainly I know, in the past week or so, there's
been so much discussion around what's happening in Afghanistan,
with regards to, you know, the education of young girls, and then
being prevented, and I saw the videos, it's heartbreaking to see
the girls, the women in the university, the girls in
university, and schools crying, because they are barred from,
from, you know, knowledge, this is not Islam. And you know, I'm not
gonna get into a political discussion, this is the proof of
it, the prophesy centum says the seeking of knowledge is obligatory
for every Muslim, and he made the distinction, men and women, he
could have just left it, you know, ambiguous, and then left it for
interpretation. But he himself inserted that distinction, so that
we know, it applies to both, right. So that is the proof of the
100 out within our deen again,
that we have to remember. So the right to own property and more
work or an income. You know, we're just again, giving very generic
information here. There's much more to this. And but, but it's
enough for I think all of us just to have a baseline understanding
that yes, we have the right to own property, work and earn income,
but it shouldn't be said that we also have the obligation to serve
our families, right, you can't at the expense of the rights that
others have over you just, you know, completely go rogue and do
your own thing. That's that that doesn't fly. We have social
obligations, we have obligations within our family systems, that we
have to prioritize. And once we do that, absolutely, you can go and
fulfill your dreams, pursue your career, do all that. But your
dependents and those who have rights over you. That's just
there's no argument or there's no discussion there. And then, you
know, mentioning here just again, the first wife of the process in
which we know he's given toilet, that she wasn't very successful
businesswoman, and his employer before they were married. So just
important little things to know, if you're not familiar with this
theater, these are things you should definitely know the right
to vote participate in social and public life. There are just so
many proofs. But again, if you're struggling with these concepts,
here are the evidences that yes, women have the right to
participate in the social and public life, but all of it has to
be done with, you know, a sense of what are your priorities, right?
You cannot abandon all of the other, your obligations to all of
us whether your obligations to your family, and then just throw
yourself into public service, it's actually doesn't make sense if you
think about it, because where are you going to be asked? Or what are
you going to be asked about, first, your relationship with
Allah. So if you don't even have any idea of your phone line, for
example, you've never studied, the things that you will first be
asked about? Does it make sense then to devote your entire life
and all of your free time to causes we have to just learn to
prioritize, and, and this is again, where, you know, learning
and going back to the the foundations of and the principles
of our faith, that prioritize this type of knowledge comes into
place, but, you know, proofs in the Quran about, again, the the
men and women are protectors, we've we've already covered that I
but also just that we do have precedents, and we'll go over
examples of women who were themselves politically active,
right, the right to choose and to be respected, you know, to be able
to have a say in your own future. This is there's no debate here.
This is absolutely a right, that women are given. And this is a
wonderful story, that one of the companions of the prophesies that
have been given us reported that a girl came to the Messenger of
Allah so I sent him in this she basically reported to the apostles
and that her father had forced her to marry someone without her
consent. And I love this hadith, because everything about it is
just is so important, especially in this content in this time, but
the bronze lesson gave her a choice when she when he heard her
case. He said, Do you want to accept the marriage or or should I
can nullify it for you right here in there. And she said, look at
her words. And I want you to think about this. And then think about
this idea that women don't have rights. She is talking to the
province.
Listen, first of all, she had, obviously the courage to speak to
him, which says that he created a society where women felt very
comfortable, you know, going to him with their complaints with
their grievances. It wasn't this, you know, no, you know, you don't
have any rights you just do as you're told and be quiet that some
people especially Orientalist and others have about Muslim women,
but he actually allowed for, for these types of conversations even
occur. But look at her empowerment, she accepted the
marriage. Okay, but what did she say I wanted to let women know
that parents have no right to force the husband on them. So
that's the whole purpose of why she went to the office, I said
that she wanted to empower other women, so that they know their
rights. But she, you know, she was, you know, she was making her
case, but at the end of it, her intention was that so this doesn't
happen, you know, what's, you know, unregulated, you know, that
people just received that this is okay, that you should not do that,
and that women should speak up. And then the problem, of course,
also encouraged men to treat their spouses in the best way, the best,
the most complete of believers and faith are, those are the best
character. And the best of you are what those who are best to their
women, and other narrations to their family. But there's just so
many messages that, again, if you've are familiar with it, then
you'll know that when it comes to these ideas, that again, Muslim
women have limited rights don't have rights, that you wouldn't be
able to easily defend that those arguments, but it is important to
dispel the myths that that exists. So let's look at some fact versus
fiction.
This is something that is, you know, again, we can have, we need
a whole other presentation on, because we're living in times
where there is a postmodern agenda. And many times what they
do is they basically re write or reinvent or not even Yeah, they
just distort basically everything. And so they may look to different
parts of Islamic history, and, you know, try to find cherry pick
certain things and just to make cases and arguments, because
they're looking at it from their own lens, right, if you're going
to read, like, go through history, but you're going to retro
actively, for example, apply modern conventions and
sensibilities, a lot of things are not going to make sense, you have
to understand things in their time, not like oh, because now
this is considered taboo and weird, I can go back in time and
judge all of history, we are, you know, we've, I mean, it just, but
that's how they get a lot of people into these situations where
they can't defend themselves, because they're making these moral
arguments, you know, from, from this illogical, these theological
positions, and people just don't have the way to defend them. So we
have to just reject their attempts at doing that by again, knowing
what you know, their angles and knowing there, and a lot of them,
they're not very creative, they're not very, they just cut and paste,
they'll find, you know, the islamophobe of the time, and then
just parrot what they're saying. So they're not really looking into
things. They're not understanding things, it's just a very surface
level, you know, cursory understanding of anything, but
they just try to make Muslims and especially Muslim women, or
anything related to Muslim women appear as though they're
deficient. And, and so just don't fall for their games, reject those
notions that if they're genuine in their inquiry, like they really
want to know, you'll know that. But if they're just asking these
questions to try to, you know, do gotcha, then you're going to fall
into, you know, unnecessary debate. And that, I think, is
where a lot of youth anyway, I've seen, start to feel insecure,
because it's like, they don't know how to defend their positions, but
you have to see their agenda that they're trying to corner you. But
they themselves have zero real context, it's ignorance, and
they're just again, parroting maybe what they read somewhere
else. So to be also aware of, you know, if you're an act, if you're
in college, or even in high school, now, all of these things
are trickling down at a very, you know, even I would say middle
school likely level, where these ideas are being introduced in the
way that we're studying religion, religion, as well as just ideas
around women and feminism and all of these things, but we have to be
careful not to fall into their narrative, you know, I mean, we
mentioned the binary but there's other ideas as well, that just
don't debate these people know what their agenda is, and be very
confident in your own understanding of your faith.
And then the best way to do that is really to as mashallah, you
know, I had said, you know, is freedom, like, they sell this idea
of freedom, freedom, freedom, and they're even arrogant enough to
look to the Muslim world, when we have a plethora of our own social
ills and problems and plenty of women here, who are suffering from
all of the disparities of this free society, but yet they have
the audacity to look at the Muslim world and start to, you know,
judge this country or that country's policies and it's just,
we just have to reject the hypocrisy and the double standards
and the best way to do that again, is look
Got the facts right? Am I not moving the slideshow at all? I'm
not I'm Thank you. I've totally lost it on this. I don't even know
I'm holding it.
Just
so you know, in the United States, for example, here are some facts
again, for you to know, more women than men live in poverty. So where
does all this freedom getting us? Right? As you my Muhammad said,
poverty rates for women and men are nearly even throughout
childhood, but then the gap widens significantly for women, from ages
18 to 44. And this is the demographic or that age where
there's really this big push, right? Be the independent woman,
just leave everything go do your own thing. Well, where is it
leading, you know, the years where you should be looking at Shahla to
building a life with someone, right, having children building
something that's going to pay it forward for you, when you get into
those older years. Women, you know, are not taught that they're
taught to abandon that and just pursue their own careers are
whatever it is on this high of freedom, but then they end up
suffering in this way, Subhan Allah, and between the ages of 25
and 34, women are 69% more likely than men of the same age to live
in poverty. I mean, that's just tragic. You know, women make up
47% of the US labor force, up from 30%. And it 50. But growth has
stagnated. So okay, we've again, been decades hearing this message
of freedom, but there's only a 17% differential from now and 1950. I
mean, that should kind of, you know, cause us all to second
question, this idea that freedom is everything.
Freedom, womens median hourly earnings were $16.20 16, up from
1248, in 1980. Right, and then men earned a median median hourly wage
of 1923, and 2016, down slightly from 1940. Let's just look at the
difference there. So we we have clearly not, you know, been been
so successful. And something's, you know, I miss here, women
working are much more likely than working men to say that they faced
gender discrimination on a job. So you give up your family, you give
up all of these other things that are actually going to pay, you
know, or really benefit you in the long run. But then you go, and
you're just ended up, you know, serving people who humiliate you
who harass you. Like, it's just, there's really the trade off just
doesn't seem right, right. But these are the ideas that so many
of our young women are sold, to push against tradition to push
against religion, and to push against culture. But the proof is
in the pudding, as they say, look at this, and you have to examine,
well, you know, these are, this is the, this is what I'm gonna give
all of that for, is it really worth it?
Much more. But
I think the bottom line is before we have to break, I'm not sure
where I'm on time. Oh, almost. Okay, I'll quickly go through
this. This is the real message here. This is what I wanted to
leave you with. There, there are two lenses or I'm wearing glasses.
Right now, we all know what a lens is. But you can either choose to
look at your life, the meaning and purpose of your existence through
a material lens, which is what this society and what modernity
really wants us to see that there's no greater objective.
There's no meta narrative, there's no grand truth, we're all just
going to die. And that's it. That's the worldview that they
have, because they are secular atheists, many of them, they don't
have a concept of any, you know, overarching truth. So when you
have a very limited worldview, then you're up, this is what will
likely happen, you'll be exploited as so many women are now, right
when they're exploited. They're limited, they're manipulated,
they're misunderstood, gaslighted suppressed, they are treated as
being inferior. This is the promise of these open societies.
This is what the results are, this is the outcome of ascribing to
that worldview, or you can look to your faith and the metaphysical
lens, the lens that you want to look through your life with what
what meaning you have while a spider created you, it gives you
what what is the promise, the promise of our deen is that you
will be empowered, you will be uplifted, you will be encouraged,
you'll be determined, you'll be powerful, pure and advantaged. And
if you do everything for the sake of Allah's product, this is the
promise that you will that you will have right or that you will
receive. So at the end of the day, what is I mean, is there even a
debate here? Right? Is there even a debate it's should be pretty
obvious which one is the better worldview or the way that we
should see ourselves through? And shall i really i we have we have
to break for Asia. But the last, you know, bit here and I'm I can
leave the slides up while we're praying or just some women that
you should know, throughout history to again, affirm your
confidence in your faith, because we are under attack there is you
know, and it's not just to Muslim women, it's really women of of all
traditions. We're being forced out of things that are very natural
for us femininity, you know, just wanting to be home at
see so many posts of, of women who tried to go a certain route, but
then realize at a certain point, like, I actually just really want
to be home and raise children and have a loving husband and have my
family around me. And there's nothing wrong with being a
homemaker. And there's nothing wrong with working, that there's
no issue here. It everybody's different. But the message is that
no reject everything that I you know, the traditional part and
just go the other way, the way where it's all career driven. And
it's all like you said, individual selfish desire, and no, you know,
responsibility to community, no responsibility to family, just
reject No, you don't need you just do what you do you. That's not our
that's not our faith. And here are women who were able to do it all,
they may, in many cases, they had incredible legacies of we
mentioned, fidelity Lohana, but many others, who were first and
foremost servants of Allah subhanaw taala. That was their
primary identity. They didn't look to other labels to affirm
themselves, they were servants of Allah. And then there were in many
cases, wives, they were mothers, they were daughters, they were
sisters, and they embrace all of those roles, and knew that these
were valuable roles, not because they were looking to other people
to dictate to them, but because Allah subhanaw That told them and
they believe in God, and that is who they turn to for meaning and
purpose. So these examples are, you know, and there's so many of
them, but be familiar with them, feel free to take pictures, and
then we'll stop inshallah for Aisha and we'll come back and hear
more from him.
You guys have to