Hosai Mojaddidi – Gathering Of The Hearts
AI: Summary ©
The speakers stress the importance of belief in the spiritual path and practice to manage emotions and actions during difficult situations, and the need to be content with one's life and prioritize important tasks. They emphasize the importance of finding the right person for one's job and building in gratitude, and the need to collect responses to spiritual work to avoid confusion and misunderstandings. The speakers stress the importance of empowering women to advocate for their needs and resetting behavior in relationships, and the need to collect responses to spiritual work to avoid confusion and misunderstandings.
AI: Summary ©
All right.
Bismillah.
Bismillah ar-Rahman ar-Rahim.
Alhamdulillah wa salatu wa salamu ala ashraf al
-anbiyai wal-mursaleen.
Sayyidina wa mawlana wa habibina Muhammad sallallahu alaihi
wa sallam wa ala alihi wa sahbihi wa
sallam.
Tasliman kathira.
Again, assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh, dear
sisters.
Alhamdulillah, we are, for those who are tuning
in live and also here, maybe for the
first time, we're just going to pick up
from where we left off last time on
the document that we've been reading together for
a while now.
It's called Foundations of the Spiritual Path.
And this is by Sayyidi Ahmed Zarruq.
And it's really just a roadmap in many
ways of how a believer can start to
bring themselves to a spiritual path or how
they can start to really develop their own
spiritual path.
And so he, as we've discussed in previous
sessions, he starts off laying the foundations.
Like if you want to be a practicing
Muslim, you have to strive for these five
very important foundations first.
And those five we've covered in previous sessions,
but just to review them because everything that
we're now discussing is actually working towards these
five.
So the first, he says, is taqwa, mindfulness
of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala privately and
publicly.
So if you want to be sincere in
your faith, that's the first goal.
You have to be a person who is
always aware that God is watching over you
and that you are mindful of your actions
because you want to obviously please him and
not incur his wrath.
So being mindful of Allah subhanahu wa ta
'ala has to also be consistent because it's
not enough to just do it in certain
spaces or in certain groups, in certain circles,
but it's always.
So he mentions here that it has to
be privately and publicly.
So wherever you are basically, whether you're home
by yourself or you're in a public space,
you have to have taqwa.
It doesn't change.
This isn't optional.
It's not conditional.
It's just part of the believer's state of
mind that they are aware that God is
always with them, watching over them.
So that's the first goal of someone who
truly, sincerely wants to be strong in their
practice, that they want to achieve taqwa.
Then the second foundation, he says, is adherence
to the sunnah in word and deed.
So this is also consistent action in terms
of following the Prophet ﷺ's example, that we
recognize that we cannot draw near to Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala independent of the Prophet
ﷺ.
He was sent as our exemplar, as our
model, so that we can follow him in
every way.
So in his teachings, that's why we have,
alhamdulillah, so much description.
Think about the level of detail that we
have about everything that he has lived through,
he did, he said.
So much of his life is documented so
that we can actually learn it as a
study, obviously, of the most important historical figure
ever, but also so that we can implement
it in word and deed.
So we should practice what his teachings are
and we should know his sunnah well.
So that's the second quality of someone who
takes their faith seriously, that they're aware God
is always watching them and that they know
that they have to model themselves after the
best of examples, the Prophet ﷺ.
The third foundation, he says, is indifference to
whether one or others, excuse me, accept or
reject one.
So this is really removing the shackles of
people-pleasing, of wanting to always, you know,
fit in and be accepted, because it does
hold a lot of us back from doing
the right thing, from just following our faith.
We're always worried, you know, whether it's in
work spaces or in our families or in
friends group, that maybe certain people won't like
us as much or maybe we won't, you
know, we'll be ostracized, we'll be removed.
Whereas when you come to the point of
seriousness about your faith, those things you no
longer care about because you realize that the
only one whose acceptance matters is Allah ﷻ.
And if He's pleased with you, then the
rest of humanity, He will, you know, He'll
deal with them.
But you don't preoccupy yourself with trying to
fit into everybody's, you know, circle.
You just leave it to God.
And so being indifferent means it doesn't matter,
you know, whether or not people like me
or don't like me, as long as I
am making sure that Allah ﷻ is pleased
with me.
So that's the third criteria for a person
who's really serious about their faith.
The fourth is now your state in terms
of your lot in this world, right?
We know that all of us are, people
are at different levels, whether it comes to
finances or the different things that, you know,
are distributed amongst the creation of Allah ﷻ.
There's different qualities, virtues, traits.
We come from different families, different backgrounds, different,
you know, racial, ethnic backgrounds, knowledge.
So many things are distributed in a system
that Allah knows best.
But whatever it is that you're content with
Allah ﷻ, and through those difficult challenges in
life as well, because part of our lot
isn't just material, but it's also events, things
that we experience.
So some people have more loss than other
people.
And it's wrong to determine your state with
God based on those types of things, because
if that was true, that people who seem
to have an easy life are closer to
God, then what do we say about the
prophets, right?
What do we say about the awliya who
were severely tested, tested more than others?
And that's why it's so important to read
the stories of the prophets before and to
read the Qur'an, because when we read
the Qur'anic narrative or we read the
experiences of different prophets, we realize that these
are the elite of the elite of humanity,
and yet they endured unbelievable tests in their
physical bodies, with their relationships, loss, right?
Children being lost, betrayal, deep, deep bonds that
we all, I think, can appreciate how devastating
it would be, right, to have your entire
tribe turn on you and try to harm
you.
So they went through all of those things,
but they are, of course, the closest to
God.
So going through different challenges does in no
way indicate one's nearness or farness to Allah
ﷻ.
There's many factors, but to be content in
either case is a prerequisite of the believer,
right?
That whatever your case is, whether you're going
through a hardship, a trial, that you are
still, you have rida with Allah.
You realize that there's wisdom in why you're
going through what you're going through.
You don't, it's not, you know, we don't
have this relationship with Allah where it's only
when things are going well in my way,
I feel close to God.
But then the moment I go through a
challenge or a difficulty, suddenly my heart is
off or turned away.
That's not the believer.
The believer says, it's all good because it's
all from Allah, all of it.
And that's the Prophet's ﷺ teaching as well,
right?
How wondrous is the affair of the believer
because in all circumstances, we say, Alhamdulillah ala
kulli hal, whether we're going through difficulties in
this world and our sins are being cleansed
through those challenges, right, which is why tribulations
are part of this world.
It's because we are sinners, we're in ghafla,
we are forgetful, we're constantly, and if we
really are being honest with ourselves, we will
admit that our day to day, we are
neglectful more often than maybe we want to
admit, right?
We may fall into behaviors that we know
we shouldn't do, a lot of time wasting,
for example, right?
Just think about how much time we waste.
And so we're, you know, we have to
take ourselves to account.
And when we realize that Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala is so generous by giving us
some challenges in this world because he's purifying
us so that on the day of judgment,
we come, inshallah, in a far better state,
assalamualaikum, in a far better state than we
may think, right, because of all those hardships.
And I just, you know, think about like
every pain you've ever had, you know, every
pain, emotional pain, physical pain, every loss you've
ever had.
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala has, you know,
a record of all of that.
And there's a cleansing process that we are
going through that we're not even aware of,
sins that we may have committed five years
ago that we forgot all about conveniently, right,
because that's what the nafs does.
It has its own accounting system where a
lot of things are erased, you know, oops,
deleted that memory conveniently.
But in Allah's record, all those things are
there, but what he does is, you know,
it's a different system of checks and balances
and erasing.
So when we go through hardships, we go
through trial, anxiety is rewarded.
You know, if you've ever been anxious, you've
ever been stressed, you've ever woken up in
a state of panic or just fear, whatever
it is that you're feeling, grief, loss, all
of those emotions are not lost.
They're not empty.
They're not meaningless.
They are ways of purification.
And so when you really think about SubhanAllah,
Allah is so generous, right, that even in
hardship, I'm being cleansed, then you still have
rida with him.
You're still content.
And then obviously in the ease, it's, I
mean, we're all going to be happy, right,
because when things are going well, we generally
tend to be more grateful, right?
We show our gratitude more.
But the challenge is can you be grateful
even during the hardship?
Can you still moisten your tongue with gratitude
for Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala even while
you're in the midst of a trial?
That is the true mark of faith, right,
sincere faith.
So that's an objective.
And it might sound easier said than done,
but this is why spiritual practice is so
important because the more you're mindful of these
reminders and you're trying, you're striving, and you're
catching yourself, okay, I shouldn't complain.
Complaining is a very natural thing that we
all do, but you'll get to the point
where you realize it's empty to complain to
people, right?
If I'm just picking up the phone or
talking to my friends and we're hanging out
and all of a sudden I get into
a negative state and I'm just really negative.
It doesn't, they don't feel good.
I might falsely, you know, think that there's
some benefit to that, but I end up,
you know, maybe, because sometimes we can wind
ourselves up more, right, when you're complaining.
Has that ever happened to you?
Like you might be over something, but then
a memory gets recollected, and then now it's
like, yeah, you're just as upset as maybe
you were when it happened because you're reliving
it.
And so sometimes we don't realize the harm
that that causes, but when you realize or
when you mature in your spiritual understanding, you
realize that my complaints are better with Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala because he obviously, I
don't have to explain everything to him.
He knows what's going on.
He knows my heart.
And so you start to really adjust yourself
and you become that person, inshallah, that through
whatever you're going through, you just always are
in a state of gratitude and not a
state of negativity and, again, just, you know,
complaining.
So that's the fourth criteria.
Now the fifth criteria, he says, is more
about reaction, like your proactivity.
So the contentment with Allah is like that's
just your state.
You're always trying to really, you know, be
mindful of your blessings and magnify your blessings,
which we talked about as well as one
of the ways to condition yourself to this.
But, like, that's just a state.
Now turning to Allah is more about your
protocol, right, like what your operating manual is
set to.
So, like, if you have, you know, some
of us, again, when we go through something
difficult or challenging or if we're in blessing,
we might have certain, you know, default settings,
as they say, that we do, you know,
where we instantly, you know, either let's say
there's a blessing.
You know, you get a phone call and
it's really good news.
You might be like, oh, my God, that's
so amazing.
And you just start to, you know, get
super excited about it.
And then maybe you want to, you know,
immediately call friends or family or whoever and
share the news with them, which is fine
to do, right.
There's nothing necessarily wrong with that.
But the believer is always, because remember taqwa,
that mindfulness of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
is always there.
Your default setting starts to adjust and you
just, you sit with that gratitude in that
moment first, right, like alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah, right.
And it really hits your heart that what
you've just experienced, whether it was a promotion
at work, good news, you know, from some
other, you know, place that came to you,
whatever it is, opportunity, that your immediate mind
is going, Allah is so generous.
Because it's easy to, again, remove or come
to that realization later, right.
It's kind of like, oh, yeah, by the
way, that du'a that I made months
ago is now being answered.
We can sometimes, if we give ourselves time,
we'll get there eventually.
But when you start to attune yourself to
this, you know, what this is calling for,
it is your default setting.
Like alhamdulillah, I see the divine hand in
everything.
I don't see all the human, like, you
know, intervention or the sabab, as we call
them, right, because they're means to blessings.
People sometimes are the means to the blessing,
right.
And it's easy to focus on those things,
but the believer always sees that it's from
Allah.
And we don't credit anyone before Allah, right.
We always want to give credit to Allah
first.
He is the source of our every blessing.
So if your parent gives you something, your
spouse gives you something, your child, your employer,
whoever it is, your immediate mind is like,
alhamdulillah, Allah is so generous.
Even though it came through this person, this
channel, it's really from Allah at the end
of the day.
And He is so kind and He is
so generous.
Because we have things that happen to us
all the time.
You know, you get, like, for example, you're
driving and you, a cop pulls you over,
okay, maybe you were speeding, right.
Cop pulls you over and you're anticipating that
you're going to get a ticket and then
you somehow, something happens, a conversation happens and
the police is like, you know what, I'm
going to let you go with a warning
this time.
Many of us may look at that police
officer like, you're amazing, thank you so much.
And we just forget that, you know, yes,
the gift may have come through him, but
who is really the one who let you
off?
Maybe financially it would have been a burden
for you.
Maybe it would have been too difficult for
you to go to court and rearrange your
schedule at work.
And Allah is giving you that grace, right.
So the believer always can see the person
that the means is coming through, but the
source is always clear.
And so, alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah, Allah is so generous.
So our attribution system of good becomes, you
know, calibrated to always seeing that Allah is
the one that gives your good.
It could be as simple as a parking
space opening up for you.
It wasn't the driver that just happened to
leave at that time.
Like, thank you.
And we can say that.
And I'm not saying not to be grateful
to those people because lam yashkuru nas lam
yashkuru la.
But it's rather that you realize that all
of those blessings are really Allah.
Even if you had, I mean, I've had
people, for example, I mean, this is an
example I hear all the time.
Sometimes people will say, oh, Sister Usai, you
know, the post, you posted something and it
really was so beneficial and I thank you
so much.
And so, and I have to remind them,
I say subhanAllah, you know, even if I'm
randomly putting together a post or you read
something from anybody, it doesn't have to be
me, you might feel like that person is
speaking to your pain.
But who is the one who inspired you
to just open that message in that moment,
right?
Who is the one who made those words
reach your heart?
It wasn't me.
I have no idea where, you know, my
posts are going and who's going to read
them.
But Allah sometimes wants us to read certain
things.
He wants us to receive certain messages.
In the moment that we're in, because in
that moment, even like if you've ever opened
up the Quran or your phone app and
you get messages, you know, hadith or ayahs
of the Quran that pop up, a lot
of people are like, oh my God, you
know, this message was like, it's so amazing,
you know, that I read this message, you
know, in this moment.
And maybe it was a friend who sent
it to them.
So we're easily, we can appreciate the momentousness
of the event.
But what this is really about is always
recognizing that it's from Allah, ultimately.
He is the one who wants you to
get that message.
He's the one who wants to bring those
words of comfort to your heart when you're
going through some difficulty.
And so recognize that this open line of
communication that we have with our creator is
always active as long as we're also engaged,
right, and we have to be.
And that's where zikr is important.
That's where prayer is important.
That's where reading the book of Allah subhanahu
wa ta'ala is important because what you're
saying is I seek to communicate with my
creator and I want to receive communication from
my creator.
So being proactive, right, in that way.
So turning to Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
in prosperity and adversity is just, again, what
is your default?
How do you deal with problems?
Do you, you know, go to people?
Do you attribute things to people?
In prosperity and adversity, the same thing.
Are you quick to seek help from others
instead of turning to Allah and saying, Ya
Allah, please help me.
So these five, right, that we've just kind
of summarized quickly are the starting point and
the way that Sidi Ahmed Zarouk helps us
to really shape our objectives as Muslims, right?
Like these are the five things every believer
should want to achieve in their lifetime that
were consistent with all five of these things.
And then the rest of the document he
works backwards in order to help us to
know how to get there.
So we've already covered some of these lists
for those who have attended in the past
and the recordings are available.
But where we left off last time is
at the bottom of page 10, we talked
about, or excuse me, not the bottom of
page 10, the top of page 11.
So the top of page 11, if you
look at the PDF, he's now, because he's
kind of worked through these different bulleted lists,
right, of qualities and different things that may
afflict us.
Yes?
Okay, so on the PDF that I'm looking
at, there is, it's in the corner.
Yeah, if you look in the right bottom
corner, you'll see 11, right?
So the top of the page, but thank
you, because I know it's a little confusing.
The top of the page says, I have
also seen that the seekers of this age.
Do you see that section?
That is a section that we're going to
cover today.
So he's outlining, and remember, just perspective.
Sidi Ahmed Zarouk, depending on which calendar you're
looking at, Hijri or Gregarion, he's in the
9th and 15th century.
So right, 9th century Hijra, 15th century Gregarion.
So in his time, he is telling us
about what he's witnessing.
So he says that I've also seen that
the seekers of this age, so in his
time, are afflicted with five things.
So it's an interesting perspective, because you wonder,
I mean, a lot of us, I feel
like we forget that history repeats itself, and
the human conditions have always been the same,
right?
Even though we're in 2024, it's not that
our problems are any necessarily worse than previous
peoples, right?
They still had spiritual diseases.
They still were struggling with a lot of
the things, not obviously, circumstances have obviously changed,
modernity and all of that.
But I mean to say, in terms of
human diseases and struggles, relationships, problems, real things
that are just universal, that span time and
place.
So for him to say that these are
five things that he witnesses his time, is
perspective for us to say that we tend
to romanticize Islam's history and think that we're
just doomed, whereas everybody else had it easy,
right?
But that's not true, because again, human problems
have always been there.
So he says, the preference of ignorance over
knowledge.
Now this is interesting, because I think this
is true, right?
We say nowadays, ignorance is bliss.
There are people who literally would rather not
know.
Have you ever met Muslims like that, right?
They don't want to know.
Yeah, I don't want to know, exactly.
No, it's a good example.
Even something as simple as dietary things, they
would rather you not read the ingredient list,
because it's like, oh, forget about it, who
cares?
We're in America, everything's halal, right?
And so they'll have these very blasé attitudes,
and they don't want to do the due
diligence to actually make sure.
They don't have that inclination.
So they'd rather stay ignorant.
But it's also just in terms of rules
in general, right?
A lot of people feel very constricted by
rules.
You see this, sadly, from people who've come
from more conservative backgrounds.
When they come here, what happens oftentimes, for
those of us who've lived here most of
our lives or were born here, and then
we come into a spiritual practice, we have
to see, subhanallah, the contrast, right?
We're raised in a culture that is so
permissive, everything is allowed, yet Allah guides us
to live a life of what?
Restrictions, boundaries, right?
Which is a proof that Iman is really
from Him, whereas other people coming from conservative
backgrounds, their entire life, come here, and then
all of a sudden they start to, you
know, the waswasa comes in, the temptations overcome
them, and next thing you know, they're into
everything.
I mean, I saw it when I was,
you know, I remember in high school we
had, and Allah will be the judge of
every person, but I remember feeling very odd
about people who had just barely come to
America, and then all of a sudden, within
a few weeks or so, the dress was
different, because, you know, our parents were very
conservative, so they didn't let us wear, for
example, shorts.
Like, we could never dress like that, ever.
My siblings and I, it was unheard of.
So I thought it was so strange when
someone was like, what, they've only been here
like a month, and they're dressed like that?
But it's because, you know, again, guidance is
from Allah.
But for some people, rules and strict, you
know, it doesn't resonate, they don't want it,
they want to be free birds, so they'd
rather not know, and that's something that we
have to really challenge within ourselves.
Do we have this problem where we'd rather
get away with things, or somehow think that
we're getting away, because obviously it's a delusion,
right, to think that just because you pretended
to not know, that Allah wouldn't know that
you actually, you know, knew, or you were
purposely avoiding accountability, you were trying to find
a back channel, you were finding a loophole,
whatever it is.
So we just have to be real honest
with ourselves.
So that's something that may Allah, you know,
again, when we're looking at lists like this,
that He's outlining for us as signs of
real spiritual disease, we should always first inwardly
look within ourselves and ask, you know, to
be real, like, do I do that?
May Allah forgive me, hold myself accountable.
If you don't have that, then also don't
forget to say, protect that, right?
Alhamdulillah, I don't do that.
Alhamdulillah, ya Allah, please.
Because part of our challenge is also recognizing
that every blessing that we have is from
Allah, and it can also be removed, and
a quick way to remove blessings is to
become arrogant, right, or to become self-righteous,
to start to think of yourself a little
bit better or more than others.
So when you recognize that you don't have,
you know, a vice or a poor quality
or a bad habit or something that is
spiritually blameworthy, say, Alhamdulillah wa shukrulillah, thank you,
Allah, please protect that for me, you know,
please protect it.
I don't want to fall into that, where
I start to just not really care.
So that's the first thing.
The second thing that he mentions is being
deluded by every spiritual imposter.
This is also very important because there are
a lot of people who are very innocent
in our, you know, community, and they do
take people for face value.
They will listen to someone who seems like
they're, you know, pious and spiritual, and we
see this.
We've seen, unfortunately, a lot of people, you
know, even recently be duped by those who
perform well, you know, in terms of their
piety.
They're good performers.
And so people who are innocent and don't,
they just can't operate from that place, they
would never think that someone could be so
two-faced.
Someone could live a double life.
Someone could be sitting up, you know, giving
speeches and, you know, acting as though that
they're self-righteous, but then living a completely
different life.
It's impossible for some people to even conceive
of that, so they may be susceptible, you
know, to falling for people who are really
good, and that's why predators know how to
seek out prey.
So you always want to ask Allah subhanahu
wa ta'ala to never be deluded by
performance, you know, by oration and eloquence and
a certain way of dressing and style because
you do see a lot of that, unfortunately,
in our community.
And with the Internet, it's just gotten so
bad nowadays where there's just a lot of
people who they don't, they haven't done the
work, you know, and if you've ever sat
with true scholars, like if you've ever met
a true scholar, you see this reluctance in
them that they don't, they're not eager, you
know, to, like, be at the forefront.
They don't really want to do it, similar
to, like, leadership, right?
Because we're warned about people who want leadership.
If a person wants leadership, that's the first
sign that they should not be leaders, right?
Because that shows that they don't understand the
immense responsibility of leadership.
The same for scholarship.
Scholarship, being in any position of teaching or
authority, is such an amanah that it weighs
on your heart.
You're always, like, afraid.
Am I going to slip and give someone
the wrong advice?
Am I going to misspeak?
Am I going to misquote, right, the Qur
'an or the Prophet ﷺ?
So that heaviness, that worry of, like, I
don't want to make a mistake is so
overwhelming on the person that they're not eager
to, like, give a fatwa for everything or
just, you know, throw out their personal opinions.
But when you see that, as someone who
just wants to chime in on every single
issue, then you should see that as a
red flag.
And it's actually, you know, signs of the
latter day were warned about that there will
be people who are very eloquent speakers, and
there will also be people who are very
impressed by their own opinions, you know?
And so when you think about, like, which
really bothers me in today's day and age,
and we should, and our teachers warn us,
and I'll just put this out there because
I think it's a good warning, to be
cautious about getting into this whole trend of
taking your Islam from soundbites, right?
Because we've created a soundbite dawah now, where
it's like, and I feel like it's very
dangerous, and as someone who speaks publicly, I
also, like, just for myself, I'm like, God,
I don't, it's scary.
It's scary to think that you're, instead of
wanting to just communicate the truth, that you're
too busy thinking about, like, wanting to sound
clever, right?
That that becomes the purpose with which you,
for why you're doing what you're doing, right?
That you want to have that perfect soundbite
that's like a 20-second clip, and it's
just like mic drop, boom, you know?
But I feel like that's the kind of
age we're in where a lot of people,
they're not aware of how dangerous it is
to curate your content, not for the purpose
of, is it knowledge that's really beneficial?
Is it important?
Is it gonna, did it impact you?
Are you speaking from a place of authenticity?
Is that your concern?
Or is it like viral video time?
You know, let me write it in a
way where it's gonna make that zing and
I'm gonna get those likes and followers.
So there are just so much of that
today that, and we can fall, like, in
the habit of liking that kind of content
because it's like time is precious.
I don't have a lot of time.
I just need to look for quick zingers,
you know?
So be careful, though, that that's not the
bulk of what you're taking because real knowledge
takes time.
It takes, like, you have to understand things
and sometimes, you know, you have to sit
through something.
It's not always gonna be comfortable.
You know, you have to, you know, sit
through courses and classes and maybe even fall,
like, asleep during that, you know, because your
nuffs is, you know, for whatever reason, it's
just, but if you're a true seeker of
knowledge, you're gonna have to go through the
challenges that a seeker of knowledge goes through
and it's not gonna be always bite-sized,
you know, portions that are just curated for
your palate that you can then, you know.
You know, it's just, it's very, it's become
very, unfortunately, it's watered down and it's just
not the way that I think knowledge has
been transmitted, which is heart to heart.
It's really impactful.
It's meaningful.
And there's a level of heaviness and weightiness
that you feel receiving and giving knowledge.
That's what we need to look for, not
just this quick turnaround.
So being deluded by every spiritual imposter is
something that we should ask all to protect
us from.
Like, we don't, I don't want to just,
you know, look for personalities and become obsessed
with people because of the way that they
look and the way that they sound, but
I want to really take from people who
I feel are connected, who are part of
a senate, who are part of a chain
of tried and tested and really, you know,
known teachers who are out there with sincere
intentions.
That's what I want.
That's who I want to take knowledge from.
So seek out those types of teachers, you
know, and ask Allah to protect you because
it is definitely an issue that I would
say our age also has to contend with.
Now, the third thing that he lists, and
remember, what he's saying, what he, this list
is, is the seekers of knowledge of his
time were afflicted.
So he's talking about us.
We are the seekers of knowledge, and he's
like, look out for these qualities.
If you prefer to not know, ignorance over
knowledge.
If you're always deluded by everybody who comes
along because they sound good, that's a red
flag.
And then the third thing, the inability to
prioritize important matters.
I mean, again, how many of us, you
know, this is a daily struggle that we're
always, you know, kind of whether it's just
time management or also like which domain of
my life deserves my attention, right?
And I think as women, and you know,
all of us here are women, and I'm
sure those who are watching, the majority are
as well.
I feel like for us, it's a very
difficult thing to do to know how to
manage our lives because we are always pulled
in different directions, you know?
And the roles that women have, whether it's
daughter, sister, mother, auntie, friend, community member, I
feel are so often emotionally intertwined that we're
usually prioritizing based on emotion, right?
And so wherever the guilt, because guilt is
a motivator, right, of behavior.
So wherever I feel the most guilt tends
to get my most attention, right?
And that can be internally sourced or external.
Like if you have people in your life
that guilt you a lot, they say the
squeaky wheel gets the grease, right?
And I think we fall prey to that
a lot.
So the one who complains the loudest and
the most sometimes gets our attention, even if
they don't necessarily deserve it because we don't
like that feeling of, I'm disappointing someone, I'm
hurting someone.
So emotional manipulation is used a lot, I
think, on women.
I mean, not to say that, I just
can't speak on the experiences of men.
I'm not a man, but I do think
that from my experience in life, I feel
like we tend to prioritize based on those
types of factors, right?
Or it could be your own internal guilt.
So you feel inadequate.
Now, for example, perfect analogy is women who
have to work outside because they're providing, they're
providers for their home, or they have parents
and children they have to take care of.
They, I think, are plagued by their own
internal guilt, especially when it comes to their
children, right?
Because it's like, I have to work outside,
but I'm a terrible mom because I didn't
do this for my kids or I didn't
do that for my kids.
And then every, quote-unquote, failure of our
children, we go back to, it's my fault.
If I were home, if I didn't do
this, maybe I shouldn't have worked.
So we start to just really go down
a spiral there.
So I feel like this quality of not
prioritizing important things, part of it is because
what we give value to is shaped by
our environments, right?
Your culture, your upbringing, it shapes what you
think is important.
And so when you go back to the
drawing board, then the criteria has to adjust
to, well, what does Allah subhanahu wa ta
'ala expect of me?
Where are my priorities based on his standards,
right?
Not mom, dad, husband, auntie, grandma.
Like, there's a lot of people in our
lives that dictate to us about what we
should be doing, what deserves our time, what
deserves our attention.
From a very young age, I mean, we
were all children once, right?
And sometimes those voices, they stay.
But at a certain point, we have to
scale back and say, who am I accountable
to the most?
Who should I be more concerned about?
Going back to the foundations, right?
The foundations that we talked about in the
beginning, that taqwa, that taqwa is what's dictating,
right?
That I have to stand before God.
So God has already made clear for me
the standards, right?
And the number one focus is what?
What's the number one thing that deserves our
attention all the time, every day, no matter
what?
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala.
And how does he expect us to fulfill
that all day, every day consistently until our
deathbed?
Prayer.
So if prayer is not your number one
focus in life, but you're very good at
cooking meals or paying bills or serving this
and that person in your life, your priorities
are off.
Does that make sense?
And this is the kind of real talk
that I think a lot of times people
do need to hear because you hear the
justification from a lot of people about why
they're not praying.
But I have to work.
It's really hard.
It's so difficult for me.
I have this and this and this.
And the nafs will start to give you
a plethora of reasons why you can't do
something consistently.
But when you understand, right, that you have
to adjust your list of priorities to the
one that you are the most accountable to,
and that's not mom, it's not dad, it's
not husband, it's not your children, it's your
creator, then you start to build from there.
Then what do I need to do?
And logically it should, I mean, it makes
sense to do it that way because, first
of all, barakah and time, who controls that?
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, right?
So if you want to see an increase
in the blessing of your time to try
to bypass obligations to God and serve everybody
else, it doesn't make any sense, right?
But to say that if I prioritize my
prayer, then Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, who
controls time, who controls blessings, he will reward
me, right?
And I remember there was a sister, she
attended one of our halaqas, and we talked
about this in terms of her fajr prayer.
She said that because of her work schedule,
it was very difficult for her to make
her prayers because she had so much to
do, and so she couldn't do them.
And so we had a whole discussion about
it, and I said, I know that in
your mind you're thinking, but I have to
work, and you're sacrificing the prayer because of
work, but logically, and I kind of explained
the same thing to her, I said, don't
you think that Allah will give you more
barakah if you pray first, right, and then
get your work done?
Because what she was doing is she was
trying to get all her work done, and
then, oops, I forgot about prayer.
So prayer would always end up being something
that she had a struggle with and she
would forget to do, or she ran out
of time because she had it flipped, right?
So this is dealing with this issue of
just not prioritizing.
So anyway, when we talked about it, I
just said, well, I think it would make
a lot more sense if you would wake
up early, fulfill your prayers, and then go
on about whatever work you needed to do,
breakfast or reports or whatever meetings you had
for work.
But don't flip it because Allah will give
you the barakah.
So I remember, I think it was Ramadan
of this year.
This was like last year or the year
before, and she saw me in the parking
lot.
She came up and she was like, sister,
I have to talk to you, I have
to talk to you.
And I said, yes.
She kind of caught me off guard.
She said, I have to tell you something.
She said, subhanAllah, I remember that one time
I attended your halaqah and we had this
discussion.
She said, I started doing everything, and oh
my God, I've been on my prayers, I
never miss my prayer, and everything changed for
me that day.
And I said, see, Allah is so generous
because maybe it wasn't explained to her that
how her thinking was so faulty.
Because sometimes, you know, Iblis, of course, is
a factor, but the nafs justifies things because
you feel like, well, I'm fulfilling a priority,
I'm not just doing nothing.
But, you know, again, just make it make
sense.
Why do you think that you would suddenly
have all these openings and blessings when you're
not prioritizing properly?
So Allah is first always, and then we
have the proper order, right?
Bir al-walideen is very important.
If you're going to reject the responsibility you
have to your parents, but you're a really
good friend, you have a problem.
You can't like, oh, I'm going to end
call on my mom because I'm here sitting
talking to my friend about her problems.
No.
You pick up the phone and you do
your due diligence to make sure mom's concerns
and needs are taken care of.
Is everything okay, mother?
And you tell your friend, it's my mother.
I have to answer my phone call.
I have to answer my mother.
I don't let her go to the voice
note.
But there are a lot of people who
feel like, well, you know, my friend was
going through a difficult time.
Yes, but you're haq.
Who has rights over you more?
How can you face God and say, what
if there was a life-threatening thing?
What if there was something important that she
needed in that moment, right, and that you
preferred one that you didn't have rights over
in the same way over your parent?
So these are all ways that we have
to understand there is a system already in
place, it's already defined for us, in order
for us to learn how to prioritize things.
But we have to be willing to submit
to that system.
And that's where the battle continues because, again,
if it means my heart leans this way,
my time, it's more convenient, we may, you
know, totally throw out the proper system and
do things according to nafs.
And this is where paying attention to, you
know, what's dictating to you.
Is it your own, as I said, mind,
convenience?
What are these things that – because if
it's Allah, then it's clear.
You don't – you comply.
So the inability to prioritize important matters is
just – it's a very large – I
mean, it's a – it covers a lot,
but I think we can all take inventory
independently and individually about what we need.
What does that mean for us?
Is it my time?
Is it that I don't fulfill my obligations
in the proper logical order that God expects
of me?
Do I waste a lot of time, right?
And time wastage is something we all have
to be mindful of.
I mean, you know, like I hate to
look at it, but I do feel like
it's important that we all look at our
screen time.
Like I can't even believe this number right
now because I didn't realize I was on
the phone this much.
But, you know, when it's counting from midnight
until now, you're like, wow, I spent almost
12 hours and 36 minutes on my phone.
What was I doing?
You know, and it's obviously telling you.
You got maps, you got this, you got
that, whatever it is.
But looking at your screen time is a
good way of acknowledging whether or not you're
wasting a lot of time.
And if you work on your phone and
you do things on your phone and you
know what you're doing, alhamdulillah.
But if it is like, oh, TikTok was,
you know, three hours, uh-oh, you know,
what was I doing, right?
So that's the kind of inventory that we
need to take.
So that's the third thing he mentions.
Now the last two, the fourth one he
says, which is interesting, using the spiritual path
as a means to inflate the selfish soul.
So this is really interesting because this speaks
to, again, about the tricks that the mind
plays, right, and the nafs.
Because, you know, we've covered this before, but
how many of you know or remember the
four different sources of evil?
What are the four sources of evil that
Allah has created in this world?
So, good.
Iblis we know, right, shaitan.
What else?
What was it?
Very good.
Very good.
So the nafs, right, the nafs is the
second.
Your whims and your desires, so like hawwa,
right, which fluctuate and they differ.
And then, what was it?
So the fourth one is dunya.
It's the material world, right?
Yeah.
So the material world is very, you know,
it tempts us all the time.
And so, you know, power, wealth, wanting, luxury,
ease, these kind of, you know, abstract things
that we strive for, those are parts of
how we divert our attention from Allah subhanahu
wa ta'ala.
So the nafs, though, from all four, right,
the material world, shaitan, and hawwa, the nafs
is the most dangerous.
It's the most evil of the four.
Because it resides within you and you don't
know how to acknowledge the evil unless you
start really paying attention, right?
Because it's your voice.
So how are you thinking like, oh, this
is evil?
It's just your mind telling you, you know,
things.
So when using the spiritual path as a
means to inflate the selfish soul, it's like
you think about that for a moment.
How could that even happen?
Well, it happens all the time.
There are many people who want to take
on a spiritual identity, not because they really
want to get close to Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala, but because they see it as
a means to status, as a means to
an identity, right?
It's like I want this identity.
I want the benefits, the privileges of being
seen as a pious person or as a
person who, you know, is taken seriously.
And they forget that Allah knows what's in
your heart.
He knows the motivation.
So if you're going to suddenly behave a
certain way or take on a certain practice,
and you're not aware that God knows very
well what your ultimate intentions are, your motives
are, then this is what happens, right?
So you're, you know, going to classes, attending
things.
Suddenly your attire changes.
All of these things, that's why it's so
important to check your intention.
Like why am I really doing all these
things, right?
If I want to be front and center.
And that's like the man who he prayed.
I don't know if it was 70 years
or 80 years, but it was a very
long time.
He prayed every single prayer in jama'at
in the first row because we know, right,
that there's more reward for men when they're
in the first row.
And he said that it wasn't until one
day he walked in because he missed his
place and he had to pray in the
back, that in that moment he realized he
was embarrassed, that all his prayers were for
the status of praying in the front.
So he actually spent the rest of his
life trying to make up all those 80
years of prayers because he was like, what
good were any of them, right?
That's Isha, right?
Yeah, okay, I'm sorry.
If anybody wants to go pray, please, we
can maybe take a pause and then come
back, inshallah.
All right, Jazakumullah khairan.
Oh, thank you, my dear.
Yes, Jazakumullah khairan.
You collected them?
Thank you.
Jazakumullah khairan.
Yes.
Thank you, John.
I have no water.
Thank you.
Alhamdulillah.
Good, I'm glad they brought them.
Was that for someone who passed away?
I couldn't hear.
He did.
Who is it?
Oh, okay.
Yeah, he said Prophet Muhammad, but I was
like, I don't know who passed.
Allah arhamuhum.
Amin wa ajmain.
Alhamdulillah.
I'm sorry, you were saying, John?
So, you know, for us women, right, when
we have all these duties and responsibilities, and
sometimes when we're just setting that boundary, like,
I have my own duties, I need to
do what's right, you know, by Allah subhanahu
wa ta'ala.
And then, you also mentioned, like, you know,
we have people who are half-brothers, right?
We have our spouses, our children, our mother,
and I'm just thinking that we all have
lots of other responsibilities, and we're kind of
telling them, no, I have to do my
own priorities.
But then you kind of get a little
bit pressured from them, like, wait a second,
she's all of a sudden not doing things
for us anymore.
Yeah.
She's putting her own iman up for us.
Yeah.
I think, you know, it's true, especially, well,
this is where communication comes into it.
Because if we make our worship, like, it's
self-serving, then that's when you're going to
get pushback, right?
But if it's like, no, I fill my
cup, I'm doing everything because there's a barakah
flow, right?
When I'm fulfilling my obligations and I'm, as
the matriarch, as the maintainer of the home
culture, the vibe in the home, if I'm
imbalanced, all of you benefit from that.
So it's not like I'm just doing this
for me, right?
So I think you have to communicate to
them that they should support you, that they
should want you to be doing more.
Because when you do more, everybody benefits.
Your state is better, you're more calm, you're
more loving toward them, you're willing to give
more.
And I think that's the secret of women
that is lost on a lot of people,
is that if our cup is filled, you
will be fine.
But when we're depleted, that's when everything goes
astray.
And they don't seem to get that until,
unfortunately, sometimes it's so late in the game,
you're like, if only I'd learned this lesson
20 years ago, you would have saved us
all a lot of heartache.
But we also have to communicate that.
That my worship might seem like it's self
-serving, but it's actually beneficial to everybody in
the household, and everybody in my life.
And I make the intention, of course, that
it's for God, but because the nature of
women is to always care, and always consider
other people.
It's very, I don't know, I've just rarely
come across a woman who I think is
so incredibly selfish in everything she does.
There's always other people factored into what she's
doing, because it's how Allah created us.
It's like our fitrah.
We're nurturers.
We're caretakers.
We have that natural instinct to give.
But I think what happens is we're pulled
in so many directions, and then it's like
you're not, you're working hard, but you're not
working smart.
An efficient household is run by really making
sure that the one in power is taken
care of.
If she's not, it's going to be very
hard to maintain a balance in the home.
I mean, I know it's so cliche, and
it's used so cheaply by people, but I
think it's true, and people just need to
understand.
Happy wife, happy life.
That's what they say.
Happy mom.
I don't know what the rhyme is.
But yeah, you just make sure she's fine,
and her needs are taken care of.
And obviously, she has to be a good
person.
I mean, we're not saying to give to
just anybody, but I'm saying Muslim women who
are trying to manage their homes, I think
have to find a way to communicate to
their loved ones that I am not being
self-serving in my worship.
My worship is actually for God, yes, but
because it puts me in the right place
so that I can then give.
And that's why I fill my cup first,
and then I can pour into your cups.
But if my cup isn't filled, and you
can't fill my cup, only God can.
You cannot fill my cup, right?
So that's our challenge, is communicating that to
them.
Does that make sense?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So that's why language matters, words matter, how
we convey things matters, because the nafs will
defend itself if it's feeling attacked, right?
But if we're able to communicate in a
way where this is an attack, I'm not
accusing you of anything, I'm not angrily saying
this, I'm just trying to foster understanding.
And in my attempt to foster understanding, I
want you to understand that my worship, although
it seems like I'm in my own room
or I'm doing my own thing, it seems
like I'm neglecting you, that's not how I'm
doing it.
I'm actually very mindful that when I worship
God and I feel like I'm fulfilling my
obligations to him, it creates a state of
total equilibrium within me that makes me feel
at peace, that makes me want to give.
And you will be the benefactors of that.
That's it.
So if you want me to give more,
don't take from me.
Make sure that I am supported in what
I need.
And right now, this is what I need.
I need to have...
I think women, we just don't advocate for
ourselves enough because we're plagued by guilt all
the time.
And so when I was talking about earlier
this manipulation, emotional manipulation, we fall for it
so easily to our detriment and to the
detriment of the very people that we think
we're helping.
But when you assert yourself a little bit
more and you say, no, no, no, no,
this is in line for me.
I work, I cook, I clean, I'm a
driver, I'm a this, I'm a that, I've
got way too many roles.
And so when I say I need to
go take a break once a week or
go do this or go do that, and
this is what really helps me reset, that's
not me being selfish.
That's not me...
I'm not going to fall for your manipulative
tactics of trying to guilt me.
I know what I'm doing.
I'm filling my cup in a way that
only God can help me.
And you just have to respect that boundary.
But we have to, I think, empower women
to be able to say that, not when
it's so late, you know, when it's already
in crisis mode and things are falling apart
and now we're reacting to like, you know,
but rather at the onset of like their
relationships.
So like a young girl when she gets
married, I think she should be taught how
to advocate for her needs.
But first we have to understand our needs.
And that's where, you know, going back to,
as you guys know, the topic of emotional
intelligence.
The first topic is, the first point is
self-awareness.
So if you don't have that self-awareness
of within you of what your needs are,
then it's like a cat and mouse game.
You're just going to be, everybody's, you know,
blind following the blind.
So you have to know your needs and
then work on communicating those needs.
So it is a process, but we're, a
lot of times we're just so late into
becoming self-aware that we end up creating
habits.
And once, you know, like, especially in a
relationship, if things, like some relationships are just
not moldable, you know, they're, they get set.
It's like some have more malleability, you know,
where you can grow with your partner.
Others are like, nope, rigid.
It becomes firm very quickly.
And this is why you look at, you
know, marriages.
You can see very clear where, where a
relationship, they're, they're two that are growing with
each other and adapting and they kind of,
you know, allow for that flexibility and others
where it's like things were set a long
time ago and now it's very hard to
change ways.
So anyway, we got off onto a tangent.
Welcome back, ladies.
May Allah accept all of your prayers.
I'm not sure if Qari Amr's dua was
for, like, someone who passed on.
We couldn't hear.
Two people.
Today?
May Allah accept,
inshallah, them, forgive them, grant them Jalatul Firdaus.
We couldn't, it was hard to hear, but
we heard the dua, so alhamdulillah.
We were part of the group that was
able to make dua for them, inshallah.
I mean, thank you.
So alhamdulillah, I know that because of my
start, late start and the prayer, we got
a little bit delayed.
But I won't keep you too long.
I just wanted to finish the list and
then read.
I mentioned that I would be also reading
from Imam al-Ghazali's The Book of Councils.
It's a really great text.
So I'll read from that in a moment.
But just to cap or recap what we,
what we discussed.
So the, you know, Sidi Ahmed Zarukh is
talking about, in his age, the things that
he is warning us about, right?
Not to fall prey to these spiritual diseases.
So he talks about, you know, not being
of the mindset that if I don't know
it, it's fine.
You know, preferring to be ignorant.
Actually doing the opposite of that, which is
seeking knowledge.
So we need to be pursuing knowledge.
So if someone sends you something, whatever it
is, information you read, you read it, try
to be that sincere person who wants to
have a better understanding of it.
And pursue knowledge in whatever way that makes
sense for you.
You know, some people are able to take
classes and study formally.
Other people are just doing the bare minimum.
Whatever it is, wherever you are in your
life, just be the type of person who
seeks to know and who seeks to understand.
So it's not that we're just taking in
information and, you know, accumulating a lot of
knowledge that we never do anything with.
But rather that you really are intentional about
understanding and growing in your connection with Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala.
And so that would be the way to
protect yourself.
And of course asking Allah subhanahu wa ta
'ala for protection from that kind of a
state.
And then being deluded by every spiritual imposter.
As we said, we ask Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala to protect us from falling into
traps, being swayed by charisma, by charm.
We're really looking for serious people who are,
who's, who's, the proof of who they are
is in their character.
And that's why it's important to, as you'll
look at the rest of this document, he
talks about how to know if a person
is like, you know, spiritually you need to
stay away from them.
Like what are those characteristics?
So he gets into that soon.
But it's important to ask Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala for protection.
And to seek out true, true sources of
knowledge.
And then the inability to prioritize important matters.
We ask Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala for
barakah in our time.
We ask Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala to
be people who are really serious about the
blessings we're owed.
And just briefly, because the story has come
up in the past few weeks, but there's
a verse in the Qur'an, and it's,
here I'll read it for you.
It's Surah, I think is it Al-A
'raf or, yeah, it's Surah Al-A'raf,
verse 175.
So Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says, وَتْلُو
عَلَيْهِمْ نَبَأَ الَّذِي آتَيْنَاهُ آيَاتِنَا فَانْصَلَخَ مِنْهَا فَأَتْبَعَهُ
الشَّيْطَانُ فَكَانَ مِنَ الْغَوِينَ Which is, and so
he's talking to the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa
sallam.
He says, and relate to them, O Prophet,
who is them, us, right?
The story of the one to whom we
gave our signs, but he abandoned them.
So Satan took hold of him, and he
became a deviant.
So this ayah came up, and I remember
looking at the tafsir of this, and it
was a story I had never heard before,
which I thought was really an interesting story
that pairs well with what we're discussing here.
But this is the story of a man
named Bal'am bin Baura.
And he was actually in the time of
Musa alayhi salam.
So after, you know, Fir'aun and Musa
alayhi salam, after he was expelled and he
died, Musa alayhi salam visited Jerusalem, where Bal
'am was from.
Now he was known, this man was known
as a very, he was known to be
a very spiritual person, that Allah subh'ana
wa ta'ala had actually revealed to him
his great name, his ism al-adham, right?
The hidden name of Allah subh'ana wa
ta'ala.
He gave it to this man, and he
was known in his, amongst his tribe and
family of having very powerful dua.
So he was, you know, considered, you know,
someone of prominence in his time for that
reason.
So Allah says that we gave him our
ayat, we gave him these signs.
So he had this ability to make dua,
and his duas will always be accepted.
So when his people learned that Musa alayhi
salam is coming to Jerusalem, they actually went
to him and they asked him, they said,
can you make dua against Musa?
Because they didn't want to change their ways.
You know, this was a big struggle for
many of the prophets and people before us,
is the people didn't want to have to
change, right?
We talked about rules, and suddenly, you know,
you have to follow rules.
No, I don't want to.
So they were, like, scared of, oh, no,
everything, all of our customs, all of our
ways are going to be different.
So they knew that he was, you know,
close to God, and they said, can you
make dua against Prophet Musa?
So Bal'am, he knew, he's like, why
would I do that?
If I pray against a prophet of God,
I will curse myself and all of us.
I can't do that.
So he rejected them.
But then they lured him, and this is,
you know, where the delusion of the nafs
is so, you know, it's real.
He's someone, imagine, who had Allah's name, like
he was able to ask for anything.
But these people came, and they, you know,
his own people, they swayed him, and they
begged him, and they said, please do this
for us.
And then that wasn't enough.
They actually offered him riches, and they offered
him wealth.
And so he finally said yes.
So he actually proceeded to go to this
mount, I forgot the name of the mountain,
that the soldiers of Musa, they were, like,
on the other side of it, and he
wanted to go basically address everybody and make
this dua in front of all of the
people there.
So he ends up riding a donkey, and
he goes toward that mountain.
So he's going to do this whole, because
his people asked him, make, like, basically a
public dua against Musa.
So he goes, and on the way there,
the donkey gets, it actually stops.
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, you know, orders
the donkey to stop.
And Balaam, you know, gets up, and he's,
like, getting upset, like kicking the donkey, and
then the donkey would proceed more, forward a
little bit more, and then again it would
stop.
And at one point there's one narration that
says the donkey actually warned him, like, what
are you doing?
Like the donkey spoke to him and said,
what are you doing?
You know, you're about to go and curse
a prophet of God.
So in a way Allah subhanahu wa ta
'ala is trying to give him time to,
like, wake up from his delusion, you know.
So anyway, he gets up there, and he
ends up making, he starts to make a
dua.
But what Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala does
in that moment is his tongue actually flips.
Instead of making a dua against Musa alayhi
salam, he actually makes a dua against his
own people.
So he's not able to fulfill his intention,
right?
His intention, his niya was real.
He wanted to do it because, you know,
the offer was too good to give up,
right?
Wealth, riches, whatever they offered him.
So he had the wrong niya.
He goes up there.
The tongue doesn't comply, doesn't do what he
wants it to do.
And his people are like, what are you
doing?
We asked you to make dua against Musa,
and you're cursing us, and you're making dua
for Musa's victory.
And what is this?
And he says, it's against my will.
So he can't do anything about it.
The tongue is by the command of God.
And they say, subhanAllah, he was cursed in
that moment where his tongue actually was hanging
from that point forward out of his tongue.
And he died in that state.
He knew that he made the wrong choice.
But this is the danger of the nafs.
Imagine, I mean, when I read about this,
I said I cannot believe, I mean, how
scary it is, right?
It's terrifying that someone who had the name
of Allah, who was given ayat, who was
given karamat, whose duas were accepted, can be
so easily duped and tricked, right, by the
what?
The manipulation of people that he is close
to, by dunya, by all those things we
talked about, right, the evils of the world,
that he actually went with this horrible intention.
And then, you know, we're talking about him
now because Allah commanded the Prophet, to tell
the story of the one to whom we
gave our signs, but he abandoned them.
So he's the one who made the choice.
He decided that the signs of Allah subhanAllah
were not as good or good enough, right,
and that he would rather take the world.
So when we talk about the susceptibility of
the nafs and all of us to the
tricks of nafs and shaitan and dunya and
all those evils, we have to be real.
These are stories for us because if you
get so self-righteous and you think you
can do this without constantly asking Allah subhanAllah
for guidance and realizing that our salvation hinges
daily on our realization that we can't survive
without Allah.
We have to realize that, right?
So what that does is it puts you
in a state of constant asking, right?
But if you think like, okay, I've been
Muslim my whole life, I pray, I wear
hijab, I did hajj, I did this, and
you start to let your mind shape this
idea that you're safe, it's very dangerous, right?
And it actually is part of what we're
addressing here, which is this delusion that we
can easily fall under of the nafs.
And so it's just, again, an important one
of many stories, one of many examples or
cautionary tales that are shared with us.
And these are stories before Islam.
So this is from the Israeli tradition.
There's stories that come from what we call
the Israeli stories, which are before Islam, but
they're shared in hadith literature or in tafsir
because they're cautionary tales.
They're tales that warn us about the delusions
of nafs or iblis and shaitan.
So that one is, I think, a really
good one because the fact that a person
can have such a terrible fall, right, from
grace, from, I mean, what more could you
ask for than to know Allah's great name
and to have your du'as answered?
But you sold that for the cheap price,
the paltry price of dunya, and just having
what being liked by your people.
So everything we're talking about is real.
We're susceptible to falling for these types of
delusions, and that's why we have to always
ask Allah for guidance and protection.
So alhamdulillah, just to wrap up the list,
the fourth one that we talked about was
using the spiritual path as a means to
inflate the selfish soul.
This is where we have to, again, recognize
the greatest evil within us or the greatest
evil that we have to deal with on
a daily basis is our own nafs and
ask Allah to make sure that even in
our pursuit of knowledge, even in our pursuit
of spirituality, that we're not being deluded, that
the nafs isn't putting us on a path
of piety and righteousness because we're seeking something
else, right, that it's actually really for Allah
because we recognize judgment day is real, *
is real, jannah is real.
We want to obviously be protected from the
fire, and we want the pleasure of Allah.
And if that's your motivation, alhamdulillah, it's good.
It's better than being fueled by other things.
So that's the fourth point.
And the fifth point he talks about, again,
he's talking about the diseases that he witnessed
in his time.
The last one that he mentions here is
attempting to expedite a spiritual opening without fulfilling
its prerequisite conditions.
And this is actually really important, too, because
a lot of times people will fall into
this mindset that in order to, like they
have to experience certain things, right?
It's like, well, if I'm going to worship,
then I should feel something, right?
I should have some sort of opening.
And that almost becomes a condition in order
for them to continue.
I've heard people, unfortunately, say that.
You know, like, prayer, like, I don't really
feel anything.
So, okay, so that means you just stop
praying, right?
Or, you know, I don't really like to
listen to this, or I don't like to
go to the masjid, or I don't like
to, you know, whatever it is, the act
of worship.
But they'll make some association with it that
it's not necessarily doing anything for them.
And therefore, that's why they don't want to
do it.
And it's like, astaghfirullah, so you expect the
heavens to open, right?
You expect, like, the angels to appear before
you because you did one prayer or you
sat up one night.
Or, like, prayer, a lot of times dua
becomes conditional, too.
Like, well, I made dua, and it didn't
get answered.
So I'm going to just stop making dua,
right?
These are all parts of the delusions of
nafs, is that we're expecting answers.
We're expecting all of these sure, you know,
signs to appear before us because we think
we've put in the work without realizing that,
you know, is that why you're doing what
you're doing?
Because, you know, you want to experience those
things, or isn't the satisfaction of your creator
enough, right?
Is it that you're trying to fulfill some
personal need or desire?
Because that is.
It's like if there's an enjoyment that you're
seeking through worship that becomes the reason why
you're, you know, you're worshiping, then you're not
doing it simply because it's the right of
God over you, right?
Allah brought you into existence.
He expects you to do certain things.
That is enough for you to do them.
Any enjoyment you get out of it is
just icing on the cake, but it shouldn't
be the reason why you do it.
And so if you're getting ahead of yourself
or the nafs is telling you, like, I
need to feel certain things, then that's definitely
something you want to check yourself about and
say, Astaghfirullah, you know, that's just because I've
heard and read stories that if you do
this or that, this can happen to you.
It doesn't mean that I'm necessarily entitled to
that or that I qualify if God wishes
to give me those types of dreams or
experiences, alhamdulillah, but that's not, that's not, my
worship isn't conditional or that's not required for
me to worship, right?
So just alhamdulillah, things to think about.
And again, he's outlining these things for us
so that we can really deeply think about
our own sincerity because if you're claiming that
you want to be on a spiritual path,
then you've got to do this type of
internal work.
You know, you've got to take, again, inventory
of your heart, of your desires, your intentions,
and make sure that it's not lip service.
You're not just trying to fit into some
group or, you know, whatever or be perceived
a certain way, but you're truly sincere.
And this is the kind of necessary line
of questioning that helps you to get to
those conclusions, right, by digging deep.
So alhamdulillah, and I'll just end on reading
because I said I would read it, but
these are from the Hadith Qudsi that Imam
al-Ghazali compiled, and they're really powerful messages
that are spoken directly from Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala to us.
And so I'll read the fourth counsel here
where he says, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
says, O son of Adam, whoever becomes sorrowful
over the world, the material world, only increases
in distance from Allah, only in hardship in
the world, and only in pains in the
hereafter.
In other words, if you're going to cry
over dunya, then you're going to have an
increase in distance from God, you'll have more
hardship in this world and more pain in
the next life.
So in other words, don't cry over dunya.
Allah exalted and joins his heart with sorrow
that never ends, distress which never ceases, poverty
that never becomes wealth, and hopes that are
never fulfilled.
So if you're going to cry over the
dunya, that's what you're asking for.
O son of Adam, every day you decrease
in what remains of your life while you
are not aware.
Like the grains of sand that come down
in an hourglass, that's life.
Our breaths are counted for, our years and
days, our numbers and hours are counted for,
minutes are counted for.
So it's all decreasing.
Every day I give you your sustenance, and
you do not give praise.
Thus you are not content with little, nor
are you satiated with much.
O son of Adam, not a day passes
except that I give you your sustenance from
what I have.
Not a night passes except that the angels
give me ugly deeds that you have.
You eat what I provide for you, and
you disobey me.
You call on me, so I answer you.
My good is sent to you, but your
evil is bestowed to me.
How good of a master am I to
you, how evil a slave you are to
me.
You * what I give you from me.
I forgive you for disgraceful act after humiliating
disgraceful act.
I am embarrassed for you, yet you are
not embarrassed in front of me.
You forget me, but remember other than me.
You fear people, but feel safe from me.
You fear their disgust, but feel safe from
my anger.
So this is, you know, again, just a
perspective, right?
Think about everything we talked about today.
Wanting to please other people, you know, not
doing enough gratitude to Allah subhanahu wa ta
'ala.
Not holding ourselves into account, right?
And it's just good reminders to ask Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala to guide us and
to forgive us and to recognize that we
are nothing without Him and that everything that
we have is a blessing no matter what
you're going through, no matter where you are.
And that's why it's so dangerous to compare
yourself to people who have more in the
worldly sense.
Always look at people who have less than.
Where we should be comparing is people who
are better in their practice, have more knowledge.
For those people, that's a good comparison because
then it humbles you to say if they
can do it.
If they're using their time, you know, and
this is a good example.
Like we're all living in the same area.
We all, you know, like whatever excuses you
give for why you can't acquire knowledge, why
you can't, you know, do this and that.
Just look around and say, okay, all these
other people are doing it and they're in
the same boat as I am.
So what makes them better than me, right?
Sometimes it just does come down to will
and desire and you can't excuse it other
than that.
It's just they have more will.
And that's why it's important to look around
and find those people that you admire, that
you look at and say, you know what,
there's something really special about them and I
wish I could have those virtues or those
traits and qualities.
Because then you have a goal but you
should also in the back of your mind
say, you know, I have to keep in
mind they live in the same area.
They have the same sort of lifestyle that
I do.
So really it just comes down to, you
know, sincerity.
And sincerity is tested with action, right?
Because we can all say things.
We can all make claims and we can
all, you know, say we want this or
that.
But action is really what proves those who
are sincere from those who are not.
So we ask Allah to keep us sincere,
inshallah.
And so, alhamdulillah, good reminders.
But any questions before we end here?
Because I know we're very past.
Yes?
When you give us the paper, on every
one you have like three times, four times.
Where do you get that from?
Very good question.
No, jazakallah khairan, excellent question.
So when we read the word, this is
the word of Imam al-Haddad, right?
Imam al-Haddad, it's on the cover.
Yeah, so this is his word, right?
So he has this one, it's called the
ratib.
R-A-T-I-B.
Yeah, al-ratib.
And then he has another one called the
wird al-latif.
Now these are all based on the Qur
'an and Sunnah, but Imam al-Haddad is
the one who came up with the formula.
So this formula of reading, you know, certain
du'as three times, four times, it's all
from the Sunnah and it's his way of,
you know, maximizing the benefit of the du
'as, right?
The Prophet ﷺ was known to, when he
wanted to really relay something, he would repeat
it once, twice, three times, more than once.
So there is wisdom in why we repeat
certain things, right?
More than one time, just for conviction, clarity,
all of that.
So it could be from that, but it's
his formula.
So this is, and many of the scholars
of the past, they would put together awrad,
all from Qur'an and Sunnah.
So it's not like they're making up these
du'as.
These are all from the Prophet ﷺ, but
what they did is they would arrange it
in a formula so that, and it's smart
of them because then he gets the sadaqa
jariyya, of compiling the du'as of the
Prophet ﷺ in this arrangement and then sending
it to his students.
And here we are, you know, centuries later,
reading the Wird of Imam al-Haddad that
is all based on Qur'an and Sunnah,
but he gets the ajr, part of the
ajr for it.
I do appreciate it that they have been
closer to their time, and Hazrat Muhammad ﷺ
and his people were there, and he was
closer in understanding that in his own life,
and then he created this system.
I just wanted to know what is the
secret.
Because I think, I read that each letter
of Qur'an has the concept of quantum
energy packets in it, absolutely, there's barakah for
every letter, every harakah.
Of course, no, it's a great question.
Yes, Imam al-Haddad.
Alhamdulillah, of course, no, I love the question,
thank you, because it is important to understand
why we're doing what we're doing, and that's
what we're talking about.
Exactly, exactly, so it's his formula, but if
you look at Imam Nawawi Hazwer, there are
other scholars who have their, it's the same
concept, it's like we're going to take the
du'as of the Prophet ﷺ, as well
as certain verses of the Qur'an, and
then just put it in this formula, because
we're supposed to have a practice of, a
devotional practice of saying du'as every day,
and these are protective du'as, they're du
'as that we should be saying, the Prophet
ﷺ left them for that reason.
So we have our prayers, because Allah commands
us to pray, but then we have means
of protection, that the Prophet ﷺ gave us
through these du'as, but sometimes we're just
not doing it, because it's like, okay, I
have to read this book, and that book,
and this book, to get that du'a,
so it's genius that they said, you know
what, let me simplify it, put it in
one document, order it, and then give it
to my students, and then those students shared
it with the masses, and here we are,
right?
Alhamdulillah.
Exactly, no, alhamdulillah, the benefit of sohbah, the
benefit of du'as, mashallah, yes, jazakallah khairan,
sister Mohamed, mashallah, yes.
Right.
Right.
Right.
Right.
Right.
Right.
Sure.
Sure.
No, it's an excellent question.
Yeah, no, it's an excellent question, jazakallah khairan,
I love these types of questions, because they
actually reveal a lot of things about just
human nature and our relationships, right?
Like, if you think about, like you said,
what would be the motivation of two people
having a conversation, right?
You can do a lot of, like, you
can put yourself in that position, maybe we've
all had conversations like that, sometimes it can
be as simple as you're being really sincere
in the moment you really are having self
-doubt, and you're vocalizing that self-doubt, and
the other person is also trying to remind
you to have a higher opinion of Allah,
so it's actually a very sincere, real conversation,
right, from two hearts that are just in
their own feelings, right?
And so they're both right, because it's important
to remind people that we should always have
the highest opinion, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
says, and there are other hadith that also
talk about that weak conviction when you're making
du'a is not good, we should have
firm conviction, like when we do something, we
should feel like Allah, it's not that we're
good and we think of ourselves as anything,
but rather we have such a high opinion
of Allah, that Allah is so generous, that
even if I made mistakes, that He is
so generous, He will accept it, so that
person who is telling you, no, you shouldn't
think that way, inshallah, they're coming from a
place of, you know, reminding us to always
have a very magnified, magnanimous kind of view
of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, which is
very important in this day and age where
people let their self-doubt kind of, you
know, go the opposite direction, and that's actually
waswasa, if you start to pick apart every
little thing you do, you can go into
what we call like scrupulosity or OCD, where
people start to, oh my God, I didn't
do this right, and then now you're spending
10 minutes doing your will do because you
think like, it's not good enough, so these
are the real things that happen to people,
right, so we do need a balance, so
I think my point is, if two people
are having that conversation and they're really both
individually very genuine in trying to, you know,
vocalize their feelings, it's, I think, just, it's
beautiful, but sometimes I think what happens is,
and this is where it's so important to
be self-aware, like are you just making
conversation, right?
Is it just what you think you should
say?
Like if you just came from Hajj and
you feel like, oh, I want to be
perceived as a humble person and I'm not
trying to be showboaty, then I have to
say, oh, may Allah, I hope it's accepted.
You know, sometimes we are, it's almost like
we're programmed to give these pat responses and
answers to certain questions about spiritual work because
we're trying to deflect from looking like we're
being self-righteous, right?
So that's very interesting because it goes into,
like, you know, like psychology, like why are
you so concerned about your worship, first of
all, being perceived any which way by anybody
else, right?
Like you shouldn't care, you shouldn't care how
people see you because it's not for them.
And that's why when you study diseases of
the heart, like when you study ostentation, riyah,
there's two sides of the coin of riyah.
One is that you're doing things because you
want people to see you and you want
to be perceived a certain way.
The other side is that you don't do
certain things because you don't want people to
think that you're arrogant, right?
So let's say you walk into the masjid
and you're like, oh, I should pray tahiyyat
al-masjid, two rak'ah, but all these
people are watching me and they're going to
think, oh, who does she think she is?
She's going to go in front of the
masjid.
You've just committed riyah, right?
Because your preoccupation is with the people.
You're not thinking about Allah.
You're thinking, oh, they're going to think this
of me, so I'm not going to do
this.
I'm not going to speak up because they're
going to think this.
Then you're just preoccupied with people.
So I think my point is it really
depends on the people having those conversations, what's
going on.
If you're falling into a habit of talking
about your spiritual practices in a way that's
self-deprecating because you're trying not to look
like you're so full of yourself, that is
dangerous.
You shouldn't do that because who are you
trying to impress, right?
And who are you trying to make them
think of you as someone who's not so
this or that or whatever?
So the best answer is to just collect.
I feel like instead of individualizing these things
because it's dangerous, speak in collective terms, right?
So if you were to come back from
Hajj and you're having a conversation, just say,
yeah, I'm Allah's prophet except from all of
us.
I just feel like this magnification of me
and I is really part of the problem.
Just speak in collective terms, right?
We're all in this together.
And that way, wherever it is, you're not
trying to get attention on yourself, right?
You're actually preventing that from happening.
Because speaking in a collective is saying, nobody
knows, and that's actually real.
We just don't know.
May Allah make us all sincere.
May Allah accept all of our ibadah.
But what if it's like, oh, I don't
know about me.
Now what you're doing is you're spotlighting yourself,
right?
I don't think it was a spotlight from
that person.
I think the other person who did Hajj
actually got offended.
It was kind of like, yeah, we all
went.
I was coming in.
So of course Allah should think better of
Allah.
So it's like one person sometimes said that.
The other person sometimes said that.
But I'm just thinking that was an interesting
conversation.
And I understand that one person was trying
to check themselves.
I'm not just some person.
I'm not a newborn baby automatically.
We don't know if that person did it
or not.
Only Allah knows.
Yeah, that's what I said.
I feel like a lot of our conversations
around these things are automatic.
Because it's like, oh, you just came back,
so you have to have certain responses ready.
Yeah, someone says, oh, you're Hajji, you're this,
you're that.
Or if you wear a hijab.
Or you go through some life event.
We kind of are programmed to come up
with all these answers.
And I think even women in general, just
taking compliments for anything is so impossible.
Because we're always thinking like, oh, if I
take the compliment, I'm somehow full of myself.
And I don't want them to think I
think of myself as anything.
So I'm going to self-deprecate in order
for them not to think.
But I feel like that is really not
healthy either.
We just have to say, alhamdulillah.
But I think just, like I said, maybe
a good way to avoid that whole self
-doubt, and is my intention this or that
or this?
I just feel it's better to just focus
on collective language, where we're all just speaking
in terms where it's like, you're not trying
to spotlight yourself.
Because it's the spotlighting of the self that
I think is a slippery slope where you
can now really get into all of these
messy areas.
Whereas just collective language is, we're all in
it together.
Totally, general comments, alhamdulillah, may Allah accept.
Exactly.
It's the personal response or the desire to
make it about you that I would say
with other people, especially when it comes to
worship.
It's not a good thing.
We should just keep those things to ourselves.
If you have self-doubt about whether or
not your hajj is accepted or your ibadah
is accepted, that's a conversation with Allah.
Nobody needs to be a part of that
conversation, ever.
You never have to talk about that with
someone else.
That's between you.
You're like, ya Allah, please accept it.
And if there was shortcomings, deficiencies in my
ibadah, please, ya Allah, forgive me and give
me an opportunity to redo it.
But for us to take those conversations and
make them public, I feel like there's something
there that we need to explore why.
Why do I have to invite someone else
into my insecurity about my worship when it's
for God and God alone?
Am I trying to get attention?
That's what using the spiritual path as a
means to inflate the selfish soul.
These are hidden sort of things that come
up if you're not inspecting the true motivation
behind why you're bringing that up in the
first place.
So spiritual struggles I don't think should be
openly discussed unless you're seeking advice from a
teacher on how to fix something.
But when we speak openly about our own
struggles in a way that is spotlighting, especially
when it comes to Niyah and those types
of things, that's concerning.
Because Niyah can't be remedied by someone's perspective.
I can't tell you, no, no, no.
If you're asking for clarification about doing something
the right way or the wrong way, yes,
speaking about that is fine.
But if it's like, oh, I don't know
if my thing was accepted, that's just a
conversation between you and Allah.
Don't bring that to people.
That's just my advice.
We have to do our best.
Because the traps of Iblis and nafs are
everywhere.
It's like a minefield, a spiritual minefield.
But part of being self-aware and growing
and maturing is like, you just want to
be with Allah.
And I think your worship becomes more and
more personal.
You really retreat more inward when it comes
to your connection with Allah.
Can I just clarify, when you said the
example of Adam, it was the nafs that
really brought him down.
But it's actually a combination.
It is.
Because Shaytan, Dunya was tempting him.
The nafs is like the greatest culprit.
It's like Iblis is your co-conspirator in
your sin.
But you can't blame Iblis for everything.
And you can't entirely blame these nafs.
Exactly.
Well, in this case, yes.
Because remember, he was given all of these
signs.
That's why Allah says, exactly.
Well, I think it's a combination of things,
but the main reason why he fell, and
he recognized it in himself when he was
asked initially.
He said, why would I curse the Prophet?
I would be condemning myself in Dunya and
Akhira.
So he had awareness of how grave this
act would be, but then it was the
temptation that got him.
So the nafs was weak to whatever they
were offering him.
And also, as we talked about, wanting to
be not ostracized from his people.
There's just so many lessons from this story
that we can explore, but that point is
also really important because I feel like going
to the beginning of the conversation we had,
as a foundation, being indifferent to whether you're
accepted or rejected by people, is really important
because we may find ourselves in situations where
we're tested to do something or not do
something because people are going to talk.
The people are going to not like this.
The people are going to like that.
And we just have to go back to,
I hold myself accountable to God and let
the chips fall where they may, as they
say.
Whatever happens after that.
Because if I'm holding myself accountable to Allah,
then I have full trust that everything else
will get taken care of.
But if I'm going to sacrifice that connection
for people, then now you're playing with fire.
So anyway, there's a lot of lessons from
that story.
But yeah, the nafs was the main, his
downfall.
Alhamdulillah.
Thank you.
Any other questions?
Comments?
Yes.
Yes.
I believe he is Yemeni.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
His birthday is actually.
No, it says here 1132 is his death
date, 1721.
I actually don't have his birth year.
Yeah.
You know what?
It's Imam Abdullah bin Alawi al-Haddad.
Thank you.
Alhamdulillah.
You're very welcome, sister.
MashaAllah.
Alright.
Alhamdulillah.
Jazakumullahu khayran.
Sisters, inshaAllah we'll go ahead and wrap up.
And I'm sorry again for the late start.
InshaAllah next time we'll be more on time.
So we'll end in du'a.
Bismillah ar-Rahman ar-Rahim.
Jazakumullahu khayran.
Thank you again.
Ladies, inshaAllah.
Yes.
Jazakumullahu khayran.
Drive safely.
Thank you ladies.
Thank you guys.
Alhamdulillah.
Alhamdulillah.