Hatem al-Haj – ADB029 Al-Adab Al-Mufrad – ADB029 Al-Adab Al-Mufrad – Chapter on Joking

Hatem al-Haj
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The speakers discuss the importance of "naught" in Arabic to indicate emotional maturity and clarity in relationships. They stress the need for navigating emotions and moments in relationships and using "lighthearted and playful gestures" to validate emotions. The segment also touches on the use of "empowerment" in Islam, the importance of honoring the Prophet's promises for small things, and the importance of sharing Yo' Yo' small generosity for small things.

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			Surah As-Salamu ala Rasool Allah wa ala
		
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			alihi wa sahbihi wa man wa ala asam
		
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			ma'a ma'a ba'd Al-Imam al
		
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			-Bukhari rahimahullah said in his book Al-Athab
		
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			al-Mufrad Bab al-Muzah al-Mizah Al
		
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			-Muzah is the verbal noun, so it's joking.
		
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			Al-Muzah would be jokes.
		
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			Chapter on jesting or joking.
		
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			Arabic Arabic Arabic
		
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			Arabic Arabic Arabic Arabic
		
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			Arabic Arabic And as reported from the Prophet
		
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			salallahu alayhi wa sallam that he once passed
		
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			by some of his wives among whom was
		
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			Um Sulaym.
		
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			He said, O Anjasha, take it easy while
		
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			leading the caravan with the delicate ones.
		
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			Abu Qilaba said, the Prophet ﷺ said a
		
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			word, which if some of you had said,
		
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			others would have rebuked him for it.
		
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			He said, take it easy while leading the
		
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			delicate ones.
		
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			Qawarir means what?
		
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			The fragile vessels.
		
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			So he is referring to women as al
		
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			-Qawarir, and he's saying to his ḥadda, the
		
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			person who like leads the caravan by chanting.
		
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			You know, when you lead a caravan of
		
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			camels, you sing for the camels to basically
		
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			regulate the movement of the entire caravan and
		
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			stuff.
		
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			So and Joshua had a beautiful voice.
		
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			So sometimes when he sings for the camels,
		
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			the camels start to move a little bit
		
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			faster and more forcefully.
		
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			So this would cause the women on top,
		
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			you know, the camels, basically the disturbance of
		
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			the strong movements of the camels or the
		
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			forceful, rapid movement of the camels.
		
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			So he said to him, رويدًا سوقك بالقوارير
		
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			Take it easy while leading the caravan.
		
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			Take it easy with the delicate ones.
		
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			And Abu Qilaba says that the Prophet ﷺ
		
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			spoke this word, which tells you that cultures
		
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			change.
		
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			You know, cultures change and what is acceptable
		
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			in one culture may not be acceptable in
		
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			another culture.
		
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			And you pay attention to these things.
		
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			Now this does not mean that the thing
		
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			has an inherent value and the inherent value
		
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			changes.
		
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			So remember when we said that the Prophet
		
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			ﷺ entered the Mecca with four braids.
		
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			Well, it doesn't mean that the Prophet always
		
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			braided his hair, but you know, this was
		
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			not something that people would frown upon to
		
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			braid your hair for a man, you know,
		
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			for a man like the Prophet ﷺ.
		
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			So this was not something that people would
		
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			frown upon.
		
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			Nowadays, I guess, people frown upon braiding, you
		
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			know, for men.
		
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			So would you pay attention to this?
		
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			Yes, you would pay attention to this, you
		
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			know, the scholars have said that these matters
		
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			change and you pay attention to the culture.
		
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			Now if you see someone with hair braids,
		
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			do you condemn this act because it's inherently
		
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			bad?
		
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			Of course not.
		
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			If the Prophet did it, then it is
		
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			not inherently bad.
		
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			It cannot be inherently bad.
		
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			The Prophet did it.
		
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			We have a benchmark.
		
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			Our benchmark is the Prophet ﷺ.
		
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			So it can't be inherently bad.
		
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			Now would you, you know, so if someone
		
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			does that, and it depends also on the
		
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			culture and it depends on circumstances.
		
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			So someone doing this in New Jersey is
		
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			different from someone doing this in Lahore and
		
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			Cairo.
		
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			It depends on the culture and how acceptable
		
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			it is within the culture.
		
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			So but would you advise people to pay
		
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			attention to the culture?
		
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			Yes, you would advise people to pay attention
		
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			to the culture.
		
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			Anyway, so certain things that people said or,
		
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			you know, that they may be subject to
		
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			cultural or that they may be subject to
		
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			cultural changes, mizah or joking is basically
		
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			a sign of emotional maturity, sign of emotional
		
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			maturity.
		
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			You know, when serious men joke or make
		
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			lighthearted comments, this is a sign on their
		
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			emotional maturity that they are able to navigate
		
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			a spectrum of emotions still with integrity, purpose
		
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			and grace.
		
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			Doing this is basically more complete than the
		
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			people who are serious all the time.
		
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			To show that you're able to navigate different
		
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			emotions at different times, different circumstances.
		
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			And you're not monotonous, like, because monotonous people,
		
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			they may be naturally inclined to that.
		
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			And sometimes it may be fake.
		
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			They may be pretending, maybe pretending to be
		
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			like serious all the time.
		
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			You know, the serious people, religious and pious
		
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			person or something.
		
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			But the, you know, the Prophet and his
		
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			companions have shown us their ability to navigate
		
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			different emotions at different times and different circumstances
		
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			with ease, spontaneity, you know, and maturity.
		
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			So the next hadith.
		
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			Abu Huraira reported people said, Oh, Messenger of
		
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			Allah, you just were a joke with us.
		
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			He replied, Indeed, but I only speak the
		
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			truth, but I only speak the truth.
		
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			And that's, like I said, you know, navigating
		
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			the whole spectrum with sort of integrity.
		
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			I mean, it doesn't lie, you know, purpose.
		
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			He's still aware of the purpose of life
		
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			and everything.
		
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			And he's using, you know, within acceptable measures,
		
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			lightheartedness and joking as a way of refreshing
		
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			and a way of connecting and bonding with
		
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			people.
		
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			And that's what he used to do.
		
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			But at the same time, he only spoke,
		
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			he only spoke the truth.
		
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			Now, if you say a joke that is
		
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			not true, that is not true, and people
		
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			know that it is not true, it's likely
		
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			okay.
		
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			It's likely okay, but it is not befitting
		
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			of the status of the Prophet ﷺ.
		
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			It's not befitting of the position of prophethood.
		
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			But people who make jokes nowadays and people
		
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			like, you know, people know that they are
		
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			not lying.
		
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			People know that this is not true.
		
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			Like it would be lying if people actually
		
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			believe that what you're saying.
		
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			But if people know that it's a joke,
		
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			then it's not lying.
		
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			It's not lying.
		
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			It's likely permissible.
		
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			Was that even that befitting of the Prophet
		
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			ﷺ?
		
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			No, of course not.
		
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			Because, you know, nothing came out of it
		
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			except the truth of his mouth ﷺ.
		
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			Then, So examples of
		
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			what the Prophet ﷺ, just to make it,
		
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			you know, when the woman came to him
		
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			and he told her, your husband has white
		
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			in his eyes, referring to this white.
		
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			And, you know, that would have meant her
		
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			cataract, like white in the blackness.
		
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			No, he meant the white, the eye white.
		
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			So he didn't say anything but the truth,
		
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			but it was lighthearted.
		
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			Or when he says to someone, we will
		
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			give you like the child of a camel
		
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			or like a child of a camel.
		
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			And then he said, what am I going
		
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			to do with a child of a camel?
		
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			I need to travel.
		
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			I need like a camel.
		
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			And he said, every camel is a child
		
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			of a camel.
		
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			Something like this.
		
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			And, you know, no old woman will enter
		
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			the Jannah.
		
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			And then he told her, you will be
		
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			young, etc.
		
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			All of these are examples of, you know,
		
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			lighthearted jokes that were still true.
		
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			Then, Bakr ibn Abdullah
		
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			said, the
		
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			companions of the Prophet ﷺ would playfully throw
		
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			watermelon rinds at one another.
		
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			But when it came to serious matters, they
		
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			were the most resolute of men.
		
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			They were the true men.
		
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			They were rijal, true men, most resolute of
		
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			men.
		
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			And that shows you the same concept.
		
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			Navigate the whole spectrum with integrity, with, you
		
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			know, composure, with grace and purpose.
		
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			So when it was time for them to
		
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			throw watermelons at each other, they did it.
		
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			Of course, you may say, it was likely
		
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			not Abu Bakr and Umar.
		
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			Perhaps, maybe, yeah.
		
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			Perhaps Abu Bakr and Umar were likely not
		
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			throwing watermelon rinds at each other.
		
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			But these are still great men.
		
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			These are still great sahaba, you know.
		
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			And it doesn't mean that you have to
		
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			do this.
		
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			You know, it doesn't mean that you have
		
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			to do this with everyone in every circumstance.
		
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			It depends on the context.
		
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			They did it within the right context.
		
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			They did it when it did not offend,
		
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			you know, the others.
		
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			And they did it within the right context
		
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			when it was not, basically, it didn't cause
		
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			any frowns.
		
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			It didn't cause any displeasure or frowns.
		
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			So if people do this nowadays, they should
		
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			not be blamed.
		
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			You know, like friends with each other.
		
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			If they want to be lighthearted and if
		
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			they want to be playful and do something
		
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			like this, that is not blameworthy.
		
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			In fact, if people refrain from this, sort
		
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			of to pretend seriousness, then that is blameworthy.
		
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			You know, you don't want to elevate yourself
		
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			above the sahaba to pretend something that you're
		
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			not.
		
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			To pretend something that you're not.
		
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			No one is asking you to basically throw
		
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			watermelon rinds at, you know, just like as
		
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			a sunnah.
		
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			Because it's not a sunnah or anything.
		
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			You know, there's no sunnah in throwing watermelon
		
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			rinds at other people.
		
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			But, like, if you think that you're above
		
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			this, then you're arrogant and you don't know
		
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			your place.
		
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			So Ibn Abi Mulaikah reported that Aisha gestated
		
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			in the presence of the Prophet ﷺ.
		
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			Her mother said, O Messenger of Allah, this
		
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			is just some of the playful gesting of
		
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			the people of Kinana.
		
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			The Prophet ﷺ replied, No, it is part
		
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			of our gesting.
		
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			And honestly speaking, there is some awkwardness in
		
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			this wording of the hadith.
		
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			And I even consulted, you know, Fadlullah al
		
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			-Samad, a commentary on al-Athab al-Mufrad
		
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			and other commentaries on al-Athab al-Mufrad.
		
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			And people recognized that there is something that
		
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			doesn't make a lot of sense.
		
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			Why is the Prophet ﷺ saying, بَلْ بَعْضُ
		
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			مَسْحِنَ هَذَا الْحَيِّ No, it is part of
		
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			our gesting.
		
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			Anyway, there is no reason to say but
		
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			here.
		
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			There is no reason to say no, it
		
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			is.
		
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			Because they are from Kinana.
		
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			Anyway.
		
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			But the point is, Aisha, you know, the
		
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			hadith is da'if to begin with.
		
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			But if you accept the hadith, then Aisha
		
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			used to joke around with the Prophet ﷺ.
		
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			Well, that is a given.
		
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			Yes, she used to.
		
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			So this is not telling us anything new.
		
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			So the fact that this is da'if
		
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			doesn't mean anything because it is not telling
		
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			us anything new.
		
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			So Aisha used to make jokes with the
		
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			Prophet ﷺ and the Prophet ﷺ used to
		
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			tolerate the jokes.
		
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			If that is what the hadith is telling
		
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			us, then it is not telling us anything
		
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			new.
		
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			Then hadathana muhammad ibn al-sabah qala hadathana
		
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			khalid huwa ibn abdullah an humayd al-taweel
		
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			an anas ibn malik qala ja'a rajul
		
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			al-nabi ﷺ yastahmiluhu faqala ana hamiluka ala
		
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			waladi naqa qala ya rasulullahi wa ma asna
		
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			'u bi waladi naqa faqala rasulullahi ﷺ wa
		
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			hal talidu al-ibilu illa al-nuq wa
		
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			hal talidu al-ibila illa al-nuq qala
		
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			anas ibn malik reported a man came to
		
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			the Prophet ﷺ asking him for a mount.
		
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			Like a ride.
		
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			The Prophet ﷺ said, I will carry you
		
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			on the child of a she-camel.
		
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			The man asked, O Messenger of Allah, what
		
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			can I do with the child of a
		
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			she-camel?
		
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			The Prophet ﷺ replied, Do camels give birth
		
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			to anything but?
		
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			Or do she, you know?
		
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			Wait a second.
		
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			Are camels anything but the children of she
		
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			-camels?
		
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			Then he said, Chapter Joking with Children.
		
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			Anas ibn Malik said, The Prophet ﷺ used
		
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			to mix with us even to the extent
		
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			that he would say to my younger brother,
		
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			O Abu Umair, what happened to the little
		
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			bird, al-Nughayr?
		
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			And, you know, there is something profound about
		
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			this hadith also because, you know, people have
		
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			different concerns.
		
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			This validation of emotions, you know, emotional intelligence,
		
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			emotional intelligence depends to a great extent on
		
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			your validation of people's emotions no matter how,
		
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			you know, no matter what their significance is
		
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			to you.
		
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			Like, you know, this child, so the Prophet
		
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			ﷺ has tons of concerns about the ummah
		
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			and about, you know, you know, the deen
		
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			and about everything.
		
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			But this, this kid, this kid's main concern,
		
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			you know, is his bird, his little bird.
		
00:19:09 --> 00:19:12
			So the Prophet ﷺ validates his emotions, asks
		
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			him about his little bird.
		
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			This acknowledgement and validation of emotions is extremely
		
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			important for emotionally intelligent people.
		
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			They need to be able to, you know,
		
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			because oftentimes we think, you know, people are
		
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			dying in Gaza and you're talking about, certainly
		
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			alhamdulillah, that the massacre and the genocide has
		
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			ended.
		
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			But great things could be happening, grave things
		
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			could be happening for, you know, part of
		
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			the ummah somewhere or for you, yourself.
		
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			But then you may want to validate smaller
		
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			concerns of other people, you know.
		
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			So that little child, you want to validate
		
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			their concern about their bird.
		
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			Even though Quraysh may be plotting to attack
		
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			you or the Romans may be moving their
		
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			troops or whatever it is that is happening.
		
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			But you want to validate the emotions and
		
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			the concerns of that little child.
		
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			And this is one of the hallmarks of
		
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			emotionally intelligent people.
		
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			And emotional intelligence may be more important ultimately
		
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			for the cultivation of your virtues than other
		
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			types of intelligence.
		
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			Next.
		
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			Abu Huraira reported the Prophet ﷺ took the
		
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			hand of either al-Hasan or al-Husayn.
		
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			Placed their feet on his feet and said,
		
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			climb up.
		
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			So he used to play with children.
		
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			And that's a given.
		
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			We know this.
		
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			Abu al-Darda said there is nothing heavier
		
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			in the scale than good character.
		
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			There is nothing heavier in the scale than
		
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			good character.
		
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			This is the Bab of Husn al-Khuluq,
		
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			the Bab of good character.
		
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			And we said al-Khuluq is your internal
		
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			image.
		
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			Al-Khalq is your external image.
		
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			And they are the same, right?
		
00:22:05 --> 00:22:06
			Wait a second.
		
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			So al-Khalq al-Khuluq or al-Khulq.
		
00:22:20 --> 00:22:26
			So they don't look the same here, right?
		
00:22:28 --> 00:22:30
			Anyway, you get it.
		
00:22:30 --> 00:22:31
			Wait a second.
		
00:22:40 --> 00:22:41
			So it's the same.
		
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			But you have the diacritics here are a
		
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			little different.
		
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			So this is al-Khalq al-Khuluq or
		
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			al-Khuluq.
		
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			This is your internal image.
		
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			This is your external image.
		
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			These are your external features.
		
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			This is your size, your shape, your color.
		
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			This is your internal image.
		
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			Your character.
		
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			And so they used to say you this
		
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			this is perceived through eyesight.
		
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			This is perceived through insight.
		
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			You perceive people's khalq through your eye through
		
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			eyesight.
		
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			And you perceive people's khuluq through insight.
		
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			al-Khaluq and al-Khuluq.
		
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			And of course al-Khuluq more important than
		
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			al-Khuluq.
		
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			So Allah created you with two images.
		
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			An internal one and an external one.
		
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			The internal one is al-Khuluq or al
		
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			-Khuluq.
		
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			And the external one.
		
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			So what is al-Khuluq?
		
00:23:47 --> 00:23:50
			You know we said it's your internal image.
		
00:23:50 --> 00:23:55
			But the definition of al-Khuluq they say
		
00:23:55 --> 00:23:59
			حالة أرهي أراسخة في النفس تصدر عنها الأفعال
		
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			من غير فكر ولا روية or حالة للنفس
		
00:24:10 --> 00:24:13
			تؤدي إلى الأفعال من غير فكر ولا روية
		
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			they have different definitions for al-Khuluq or
		
00:24:16 --> 00:24:17
			al-Khuluq.
		
00:24:17 --> 00:24:20
			So حالة أرهي أراسخة it means like a
		
00:24:20 --> 00:24:24
			stable established state of the soul.
		
00:24:24 --> 00:24:25
			It's a state of the soul.
		
00:24:26 --> 00:24:28
			It's the state of your inner being.
		
00:24:29 --> 00:24:33
			The state of your inner being تصدر عنها
		
00:24:33 --> 00:24:36
			الأفعال من غير فكر ولا روية that motivates
		
00:24:36 --> 00:24:41
			action or results in action without deliberation.
		
00:24:41 --> 00:24:43
			Without deliberation.
		
00:24:43 --> 00:24:46
			So generous people they don't think when they
		
00:24:46 --> 00:24:47
			give.
		
00:24:48 --> 00:24:50
			It's without deliberation.
		
00:24:50 --> 00:24:53
			You know so you pass by like a
		
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			poor person and generous people they don't deliberate
		
00:24:59 --> 00:25:03
			because they have in part of their inner
		
00:25:03 --> 00:25:07
			image part of their internal image is the
		
00:25:07 --> 00:25:08
			character of generosity.
		
00:25:09 --> 00:25:12
			And there is we said that remember when
		
00:25:12 --> 00:25:16
			we talked in the beginning of this series
		
00:25:16 --> 00:25:20
			we talked about we said that تزكية is
		
00:25:20 --> 00:25:25
			three elements spirituality that's روحانيات and that's the
		
00:25:25 --> 00:25:28
			basis of everything the basis of everything and
		
00:25:28 --> 00:25:32
			then character or conduct that is الأخلاق and
		
00:25:32 --> 00:25:37
			then أداب etiquettes character, conduct, ethics all of
		
00:25:37 --> 00:25:38
			this is called الأخلاق.
		
00:25:38 --> 00:25:44
			And then etiquettes etiquettes are basically the manifestations
		
00:25:44 --> 00:25:47
			of your character.
		
00:25:47 --> 00:25:52
			So giving is a sign of generosity.
		
00:25:52 --> 00:25:55
			Giving is a sign of generosity.
		
00:25:55 --> 00:25:56
			What is the خلق?
		
00:25:57 --> 00:25:58
			The خلق is generosity.
		
00:25:59 --> 00:26:03
			The أدب or the action that resulted emanated
		
00:26:03 --> 00:26:06
			from that خلق is the giving.
		
00:26:06 --> 00:26:10
			Okay and then all of this is based
		
00:26:11 --> 00:26:15
			on spirituality on the state of your spirit
		
00:26:15 --> 00:26:18
			and your connection with Allah SWT because Allah
		
00:26:18 --> 00:26:19
			is the source of all good.
		
00:26:20 --> 00:26:24
			So why are atheist people generous?
		
00:26:24 --> 00:26:26
			Some of them are generous.
		
00:26:27 --> 00:26:30
			We said that this is herd generosity.
		
00:26:31 --> 00:26:36
			These are things that were acquired because Allah
		
00:26:36 --> 00:26:41
			SWT from Allah still from Allah because the
		
00:26:41 --> 00:26:44
			natural disposition of human beings Allah SWT created
		
00:26:44 --> 00:26:47
			human beings with natural disposition.
		
00:26:48 --> 00:26:50
			So the source is still from Allah even
		
00:26:50 --> 00:26:54
			though they may reject it or deny it.
		
00:26:55 --> 00:27:02
			But certainly eventually eventually when that prevails when
		
00:27:02 --> 00:27:06
			the denial of God prevails those أخذاك will
		
00:27:06 --> 00:27:10
			be will dry up gradually.
		
00:27:11 --> 00:27:14
			That could take centuries but they will dry
		
00:27:14 --> 00:27:17
			up because they are disconnected from the source.
		
00:27:17 --> 00:27:20
			They are disconnected from the source.
		
00:27:21 --> 00:27:26
			Anyway so الخلق the internal image the state
		
00:27:26 --> 00:27:29
			of being of inner being the state of
		
00:27:29 --> 00:27:33
			your soul that results in actions without deliberation.
		
00:27:35 --> 00:27:38
			This is what we are talking about here.
		
00:27:38 --> 00:27:40
			These ethics are what we are talking about
		
00:27:40 --> 00:27:40
			here.
		
00:27:41 --> 00:27:43
			You could say that this is as far
		
00:27:43 --> 00:27:45
			as you are concerned but as far as
		
00:27:45 --> 00:27:48
			ethics are concerned there is like a bundle
		
00:27:48 --> 00:27:51
			of principles and principles and guidelines that were
		
00:27:51 --> 00:27:56
			regulated by the Sharia that lead to wholesome
		
00:27:56 --> 00:27:59
			living and that lead to you know success
		
00:27:59 --> 00:28:03
			success in this life and the hereafter.
		
00:28:04 --> 00:28:06
			The Prophet ﷺ said that there is nothing
		
00:28:06 --> 00:28:10
			heavier in the scale than good character which
		
00:28:10 --> 00:28:13
			highlights the importance and the significance of good
		
00:28:13 --> 00:28:16
			character in our deen.
		
00:28:17 --> 00:28:23
			And this is also an invitation to people
		
00:28:24 --> 00:28:28
			invitation for people to cultivate virtue in themselves
		
00:28:28 --> 00:28:30
			because at the end of the day you
		
00:28:30 --> 00:28:33
			will be put in the scale they say
		
00:28:33 --> 00:28:35
			that people you yourself will be put in
		
00:28:35 --> 00:28:36
			the scale.
		
00:28:38 --> 00:28:42
			Who are the ones that are thaqalat mawazinahum?
		
00:28:42 --> 00:28:46
			The people who cultivated those virtues they will
		
00:28:46 --> 00:28:48
			come and they will be placed in the
		
00:28:48 --> 00:28:52
			scale and they will be heavier.
		
00:28:53 --> 00:28:56
			That's why the Prophet ﷺ said that the
		
00:28:56 --> 00:28:59
			legs of Abdullah ibn Mas'ud the legs
		
00:28:59 --> 00:29:02
			of Abdullah ibn Mas'ud weigh heavier than
		
00:29:02 --> 00:29:05
			the mountain of Uhud are heavier than the
		
00:29:05 --> 00:29:10
			mountain of Uhud because they will be weighed.
		
00:29:15 --> 00:29:16
			How do you weigh the legs?
		
00:29:16 --> 00:29:19
			It's not the muscles it's not the bones.
		
00:29:20 --> 00:29:25
			Whatever these legs were used for you know
		
00:29:25 --> 00:29:27
			all of this will be weighed.
		
00:29:29 --> 00:29:33
			Then he says Abdullah ibn
		
00:29:33 --> 00:29:44
			Amr
		
00:29:44 --> 00:29:47
			said the Prophet ﷺ was neither obscene nor
		
00:29:47 --> 00:29:51
			vulgar he would say the best among you
		
00:29:51 --> 00:29:54
			are those who are best in character the
		
00:29:54 --> 00:29:57
			best among you are those who are best
		
00:29:57 --> 00:29:59
			in character.
		
00:29:59 --> 00:30:03
			That's a benchmark a measuring stick a yardstick
		
00:30:03 --> 00:30:05
			you know if you want to measure people
		
00:30:05 --> 00:30:08
			if you want to measure yourself then you
		
00:30:08 --> 00:30:12
			see you have a way to do this
		
00:30:12 --> 00:30:16
			the Prophet ﷺ gave you something objective to
		
00:30:16 --> 00:30:17
			measure yourself with.
		
00:30:20 --> 00:30:24
			Because like I said these akhlaq manifest in
		
00:30:24 --> 00:30:28
			adab manifest in proper etiquette proper behavior proper
		
00:30:28 --> 00:30:31
			you know so you can measure yourself.
		
00:30:53 --> 00:30:55
			So Amr ibn Shu'ayb from his father
		
00:30:55 --> 00:30:58
			from his grandfather reported that the Prophet ﷺ
		
00:30:58 --> 00:31:01
			said to them shall I inform you of
		
00:31:01 --> 00:31:04
			the one most beloved to me and the
		
00:31:04 --> 00:31:06
			closest to me on the day of judgment
		
00:31:06 --> 00:31:08
			the people remain silent.
		
00:31:10 --> 00:31:13
			He repeated it twice or three times they
		
00:31:13 --> 00:31:16
			said yes O Messenger of Allah he replied
		
00:31:16 --> 00:31:19
			the best of you in character the best
		
00:31:19 --> 00:31:35
			of you in character Abu
		
00:31:35 --> 00:31:38
			Huraira said the Prophet ﷺ said I have
		
00:31:38 --> 00:31:41
			only been sent to perfect righteous character I
		
00:31:41 --> 00:31:45
			have only been sent to perfect righteous character
		
00:31:45 --> 00:31:49
			or ethics to perfect ethics to perfect righteous
		
00:31:49 --> 00:31:55
			character you notice a few things here you
		
00:31:55 --> 00:31:59
			notice the one it highlights what it highlights
		
00:31:59 --> 00:32:01
			the importance of good character good conduct in
		
00:32:01 --> 00:32:04
			Islam of course if he is sent to
		
00:32:04 --> 00:32:07
			perfect good character then that highlights the importance
		
00:32:07 --> 00:32:11
			of good character in Islam the other thing
		
00:32:11 --> 00:32:13
			here is that you notice that he said
		
00:32:13 --> 00:32:15
			I have only been sent to perfect righteous
		
00:32:15 --> 00:32:19
			character or good conduct in Islam been only
		
00:32:19 --> 00:32:23
			sent to perfect so this is not to
		
00:32:23 --> 00:32:27
			initiate this is not to introduce this is
		
00:32:27 --> 00:32:33
			to perfect this is a recognition that you
		
00:32:33 --> 00:32:37
			are born with these character they are built
		
00:32:37 --> 00:32:45
			into you but the Prophet ﷺ was sent
		
00:32:45 --> 00:32:49
			to refine them perfect them polish them make
		
00:32:49 --> 00:32:55
			them shine so it is refinement and perfection
		
00:32:55 --> 00:33:00
			it's not initiation it's not introduction and there
		
00:33:00 --> 00:33:02
			is also a recognition here of the previous
		
00:33:02 --> 00:33:05
			messages that this is an ongoing work an
		
00:33:05 --> 00:33:08
			ongoing work it will be fulfilled and perfected
		
00:33:08 --> 00:33:11
			by me but this has been an ongoing
		
00:33:11 --> 00:33:38
			work next Aisha
		
00:33:38 --> 00:33:42
			said whenever the Prophet ﷺ was given a
		
00:33:42 --> 00:33:44
			choice between two matters he would choose the
		
00:33:44 --> 00:33:46
			easier of the two as long as it
		
00:33:46 --> 00:33:49
			did not involve sin but if it involved
		
00:33:49 --> 00:33:52
			sin he would distance himself from it more
		
00:33:52 --> 00:33:55
			than anyone else he never took revenge for
		
00:33:55 --> 00:33:58
			himself but if the sanctity of Allah was
		
00:33:58 --> 00:34:02
			violated he would avenge it for the sake
		
00:34:02 --> 00:34:05
			of Allah he would avenge it for the
		
00:34:05 --> 00:34:09
			sake of Allah so this hadith is about
		
00:34:09 --> 00:34:12
			the Prophet ﷺ and the nature of the
		
00:34:12 --> 00:34:15
			Prophet ﷺ he liked ease did not like
		
00:34:15 --> 00:34:18
			hardship as long as ease did not involve
		
00:34:18 --> 00:34:23
			sin he would always go for ease not
		
00:34:23 --> 00:34:31
			hardship and it also shows the impartiality of
		
00:34:31 --> 00:34:34
			the Prophet ﷺ and the magnanimity of his
		
00:34:34 --> 00:34:37
			character he never avenged himself but he would
		
00:34:37 --> 00:34:42
			only avenge the you know the rights of
		
00:34:42 --> 00:34:50
			Allah ﷻ sanctities of Allah ﷻ and certainly
		
00:34:50 --> 00:35:00
			he was our benchmark the ultimate basically form
		
00:35:00 --> 00:35:07
			of the ultimate realization of the ultimate realization
		
00:35:07 --> 00:35:12
			of virtue was the Prophet ﷺ so we
		
00:35:12 --> 00:35:14
			were given the book we were given the
		
00:35:14 --> 00:35:17
			instructions we were given the guidance but we
		
00:35:17 --> 00:35:21
			were given also the example to follow along
		
00:35:21 --> 00:35:24
			with this guidance so it was not only
		
00:35:24 --> 00:35:27
			theory that we were given that was passed
		
00:35:27 --> 00:35:32
			down to us but the example as well
		
00:35:32 --> 00:35:35
			was given to us in the Prophet ﷺ
		
00:35:36 --> 00:35:43
			and thereafter his disciples رضي الله عنهم then
		
00:35:43 --> 00:35:48
			he said قَالَ حَدَّثَنَا مُحَمَّدَ بِنِ كَثِيرِ قَالَ
		
00:35:48 --> 00:35:51
			أَغْبَرَ نَوْسِفِيَانَ عَنْ زُبَيِّدَ عَنْ مُرَّىٰ عَنْ عَبْدِ
		
00:35:51 --> 00:35:54
			اللَّهِ قَالَ إِنَّ اللَّهَ تَعَالَ قَاسَمَ بَيْنَكُمْ أَخْلَاقَكُمْ
		
00:35:54 --> 00:35:57
			كَمَا قَاسَمَ بَيْنَكُمْ أَرْزَاقَكُمْ وَإِنَّ اللَّهَ تَعَالَ يُعْطِي
		
00:35:57 --> 00:36:00
			الْمَالَ مَنْ أَحَبَّهُمَنْ لَيُحِبَّ وَلَيُعْتِي الْإِيمَانَ إِلَّا مَنْ
		
00:36:00 --> 00:36:05
			يُحِبَّ فَمَنْ ظَنَّ بِالْمَالَ أَنْ يُنْفِقَهُ وَخَافَ الْعَدُوَّ
		
00:36:05 --> 00:36:10
			أَنْ يُجَاهِدَهُ وَهَابَ اللَّيْلَ أَنْ يُكَابِدَهُ فَلْيُكْثِرْ مِنْ
		
00:36:10 --> 00:36:12
			قَوْلِ la ilaha illallah, wa subhanallah, wa alhamdulillah,
		
00:36:12 --> 00:36:16
			wa allahu akbar so Abdullah ibn Mas'ud
		
00:36:16 --> 00:36:18
			says and when he says Abdullah it's usually
		
00:36:18 --> 00:36:22
			Abdullah ibn Mas'ud Abdullah ibn Mas'ud
		
00:36:22 --> 00:36:25
			says indeed Allah has distributed character among you
		
00:36:25 --> 00:36:32
			just as he has distributed sustenance certainly you
		
00:36:32 --> 00:36:34
			know everybody is happy with their character but
		
00:36:34 --> 00:36:36
			people, most people are not happy with their
		
00:36:36 --> 00:36:40
			sustenance they say that you know that Allah
		
00:36:40 --> 00:36:45
			distributed intellects and sustenance so everybody was happy
		
00:36:45 --> 00:36:48
			with their intellect but nobody was happy with
		
00:36:48 --> 00:36:53
			their sustenance a wise person should do the
		
00:36:53 --> 00:36:58
			opposite everybody is happy with their character I
		
00:36:58 --> 00:37:00
			guess, everybody is happy with their intellect they
		
00:37:00 --> 00:37:03
			think that they're the smartest and the most
		
00:37:03 --> 00:37:06
			behaved but very few people are happy with
		
00:37:06 --> 00:37:12
			their sustenance anyway so Allah gives wealth to
		
00:37:12 --> 00:37:14
			those he loves and those he does not
		
00:37:14 --> 00:37:19
			love and look at this, look at the
		
00:37:19 --> 00:37:22
			precision here, he gives wealth to those he
		
00:37:22 --> 00:37:25
			loves and those he does not love wealth
		
00:37:25 --> 00:37:27
			is not a bad thing and Allah gives
		
00:37:27 --> 00:37:30
			wealth to those he loves but he also
		
00:37:30 --> 00:37:33
			gives wealth to those he doesn't love but
		
00:37:33 --> 00:37:36
			he grants faith only to those he loves
		
00:37:36 --> 00:37:39
			so whoever is stingy in spending his wealth,
		
00:37:40 --> 00:37:44
			fears fighting the enemy is hesitant to endure
		
00:37:44 --> 00:37:50
			hardship of the night in prayer he didn't
		
00:37:50 --> 00:37:54
			say let him get lost he said let
		
00:37:54 --> 00:37:56
			him increase in saying there is no god
		
00:37:56 --> 00:37:59
			but Allah, glorified is Allah praise be to
		
00:37:59 --> 00:38:03
			Allah and Allah is the greatest there is
		
00:38:03 --> 00:38:05
			no god but Allah praise be to Allah
		
00:38:05 --> 00:38:08
			and Allah is the greatest so that, you
		
00:38:08 --> 00:38:13
			know whether this is from Abdullah bin Mas
		
00:38:13 --> 00:38:16
			'ud or it's traceable to the Prophet it
		
00:38:16 --> 00:38:20
			sounds traceable to the Prophet sounds like the
		
00:38:20 --> 00:38:25
			speech of the Prophet but you see this
		
00:38:25 --> 00:38:28
			is consistent in the teaching of the Prophet
		
00:38:28 --> 00:38:32
			peace be upon him to open avenues for
		
00:38:32 --> 00:38:36
			people to come closer to Allah even if
		
00:38:36 --> 00:38:38
			you're not up to fighting, if you're not
		
00:38:38 --> 00:38:40
			up to qiyam al-layl if you're not
		
00:38:40 --> 00:38:43
			up to a lot of the noble things
		
00:38:43 --> 00:38:46
			that a lot of people fall short of
		
00:38:46 --> 00:38:49
			at least try to say there is no
		
00:38:49 --> 00:38:50
			god but Allah, glorified is Allah praise be
		
00:38:50 --> 00:38:53
			to Allah and Allah is the greatest so
		
00:38:53 --> 00:38:56
			he's not telling you get lost, he's telling
		
00:38:56 --> 00:38:59
			you you still have a chance try, you
		
00:38:59 --> 00:39:05
			know, maybe you can do this then Babu
		
00:39:05 --> 00:39:07
			Sakhawat al-Nafs chapter on the generosity of
		
00:39:07 --> 00:39:20
			spirit the
		
00:39:20 --> 00:39:22
			Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said wealth is
		
00:39:22 --> 00:39:26
			not having many positions but true wealth is
		
00:39:26 --> 00:39:29
			the richness of the soul true wealth is
		
00:39:29 --> 00:39:32
			the richness of the soul richness or self
		
00:39:32 --> 00:39:37
			-sufficiency and ghina in truth is self-sufficiency
		
00:39:38 --> 00:39:40
			because you're not ghani until you're self-sufficient
		
00:39:40 --> 00:39:44
			you're not ghani unless you're content with what
		
00:39:44 --> 00:39:49
			you have you're always faqir, in need you
		
00:39:49 --> 00:39:51
			know if you're not content with what you
		
00:39:51 --> 00:39:53
			have but once you're content with what you
		
00:39:53 --> 00:39:55
			have you're ghani, meaning what?
		
00:39:56 --> 00:39:57
			mustaghni, meaning what?
		
00:39:58 --> 00:40:03
			self-sufficient you don't need anything other than
		
00:40:03 --> 00:40:07
			what you have so that's true wealth or
		
00:40:07 --> 00:40:24
			richness self-sufficiency then he said he...
		
00:40:35 --> 00:40:37
			Anas said, I served the Prophet sallallahu alayhi
		
00:40:37 --> 00:40:42
			wa sallam for 10 years for 10 years
		
00:40:42 --> 00:40:45
			and he never said to me a word
		
00:40:45 --> 00:40:48
			of annoyance you know he never said to
		
00:40:48 --> 00:40:51
			me for anything I did not do, why
		
00:40:51 --> 00:40:53
			didn't you do it nor for something I
		
00:40:53 --> 00:40:58
			did why did you do it this hadith
		
00:40:58 --> 00:41:04
			is extremely strong very established from the Prophet
		
00:41:04 --> 00:41:08
			sallallahu alayhi wa sallam Sulaiman ibn Harb this
		
00:41:08 --> 00:41:13
			hadith is is all basris here all people
		
00:41:13 --> 00:41:17
			from basra all the narrators here are basris
		
00:41:17 --> 00:41:21
			Sulaiman ibn Harb was basri Ahmad ibn Zaid
		
00:41:21 --> 00:41:25
			basri Thabit al-Bunani basri Anas lived in
		
00:41:25 --> 00:41:28
			Basra you know so all of these are
		
00:41:28 --> 00:41:31
			from Basra and all of these are great
		
00:41:33 --> 00:41:45
			you know trustworthy narrators great trustworthy narrators Hamad
		
00:41:45 --> 00:41:47
			ibn Zaid is Hamad ibn Zaid ibn Dirham
		
00:41:47 --> 00:41:50
			there are two Hamads that are known for
		
00:41:50 --> 00:41:54
			Basra Hamad ibn Zaid ibn Dirham and Hamad
		
00:41:54 --> 00:41:58
			ibn Salama ibn Dinar these are two very
		
00:41:58 --> 00:42:02
			great narrators from Basra both of them were
		
00:42:02 --> 00:42:06
			imams they are different from the teacher of
		
00:42:06 --> 00:42:08
			Imam Abu Hanifa his name was Hamad ibn
		
00:42:08 --> 00:42:11
			Abi Sulaiman and he was a little bit
		
00:42:11 --> 00:42:13
			older than the two of them than Hamad
		
00:42:13 --> 00:42:19
			ibn Zaid and Hamad ibn Salama and of
		
00:42:19 --> 00:42:22
			course the teacher of Abu Hanifa was Kufi
		
00:42:52 --> 00:42:55
			so Anas reports the Prophet ﷺ was merciful
		
00:42:55 --> 00:42:58
			no one came to him except that he
		
00:42:58 --> 00:43:03
			promised to help them so he says if
		
00:43:03 --> 00:43:06
			he had something he would fulfill it so
		
00:43:06 --> 00:43:09
			whenever the Prophet ﷺ was asked he would
		
00:43:09 --> 00:43:15
			either honor the mas'ala he would either
		
00:43:15 --> 00:43:20
			give or promise give or promise you know
		
00:43:20 --> 00:43:23
			later when things get better when I have
		
00:43:23 --> 00:43:27
			money when I have this come back to
		
00:43:27 --> 00:43:31
			us so he would not basically say no
		
00:43:32 --> 00:43:37
			but he would either give or promise he
		
00:43:37 --> 00:43:40
			says if he had something he would fulfill
		
00:43:40 --> 00:43:43
			it even when the prayer was about to
		
00:43:43 --> 00:43:46
			begin like an Arabi a Bedouin man came
		
00:43:46 --> 00:43:51
			to him tugged on his garment and said
		
00:43:51 --> 00:43:54
			I have only a small need and I
		
00:43:54 --> 00:44:01
			have only a small need left I have
		
00:44:01 --> 00:44:03
			only a small need left so it appears
		
00:44:03 --> 00:44:05
			that the Prophet was tending to his needs
		
00:44:05 --> 00:44:08
			before that but then it was time for
		
00:44:08 --> 00:44:10
			the prayer and they called to the prayer
		
00:44:10 --> 00:44:12
			the Prophet went to pray to the man
		
00:44:12 --> 00:44:16
			grabbed him from his garment and said I
		
00:44:16 --> 00:44:19
			only have a small need left و أخاف
		
00:44:19 --> 00:44:25
			أنساها and I am afraid or I fear
		
00:44:25 --> 00:44:29
			forgetting it so the Prophet ﷺ left with
		
00:44:29 --> 00:44:31
			him fulfilled his need and then returned to
		
00:44:31 --> 00:44:34
			pray the Prophet left with him fulfilled his
		
00:44:34 --> 00:44:39
			need and then returned to pray well sometimes
		
00:44:39 --> 00:44:41
			you may say that if you allow people
		
00:44:41 --> 00:44:43
			to do this to all people and so
		
00:44:43 --> 00:44:46
			on and so but Allah did not basically
		
00:44:46 --> 00:44:52
			Allah wanted to show that the Prophet was
		
00:44:52 --> 00:45:00
			the greatest exemplar of beauty and generosity so
		
00:45:00 --> 00:45:03
			it doesn't mean that a behavior like this
		
00:45:03 --> 00:45:07
			must be tolerated all the time you know
		
00:45:07 --> 00:45:09
			the behavior of the Bedouin man must be
		
00:45:09 --> 00:45:12
			tolerated all the time the Imam may say
		
00:45:12 --> 00:45:14
			to the Bedouin let's finish the prayer first
		
00:45:14 --> 00:45:16
			and I will tend to your needs people
		
00:45:16 --> 00:45:19
			are waiting something of that nature but the
		
00:45:19 --> 00:45:26
			Prophet ﷺ was showing here his forbearance to
		
00:45:26 --> 00:45:32
			the Sahaba you know like a was a
		
00:45:32 --> 00:45:44
			moment for teaching then he says so
		
00:45:44 --> 00:45:47
			Jabir said the Prophet ﷺ was never asked
		
00:45:47 --> 00:45:51
			for anything and replied no as we said
		
00:45:51 --> 00:45:56
			he would either give or promise does that
		
00:45:56 --> 00:45:59
			mean he never replied no you have to
		
00:45:59 --> 00:46:01
			put this in the right context didn't they
		
00:46:01 --> 00:46:03
			ask him to worship his God were there
		
00:46:03 --> 00:46:05
			Gods one year and he worships his God
		
00:46:05 --> 00:46:09
			one year when he said no so he
		
00:46:09 --> 00:46:12
			would say no but we're talking here you
		
00:46:12 --> 00:46:16
			know if there is no if there is
		
00:46:16 --> 00:46:21
			no sin involved or you know the request
		
00:46:21 --> 00:46:25
			was not basically an excessive or bad request
		
00:46:25 --> 00:46:29
			then the Prophet ﷺ would honor all requests
		
00:46:29 --> 00:46:38
			by you know giving or promising and this
		
00:46:38 --> 00:46:47
			is also a very strong Hadith this
		
00:46:47 --> 00:46:56
			is likely this is likely this could
		
00:46:56 --> 00:47:01
			be this could be that's the problem when
		
00:47:01 --> 00:47:04
			they give you the first name only because
		
00:47:04 --> 00:47:11
			Qabisa reported from both most of the time
		
00:47:11 --> 00:47:17
			he reported from and both they both reported
		
00:47:17 --> 00:47:30
			from and both reported this Hadith so
		
00:47:30 --> 00:47:52
			likely but could be then anyway Arabic
		
00:47:59 --> 00:48:07
			Arabic Abdullah ibn Az-Zubayr that's the son
		
00:48:07 --> 00:48:11
			of Asma said I have not seen two
		
00:48:11 --> 00:48:13
			women more generous than Aisha and Asma.
		
00:48:13 --> 00:48:18
			Aisha is his aunt, and Asmaa's mother.
		
00:48:19 --> 00:48:22
			Their generosity was different though.
		
00:48:22 --> 00:48:25
			So he's saying that the generosity of Asmaa
		
00:48:25 --> 00:48:27
			and Aisha was different.
		
00:48:28 --> 00:48:30
			Aisha would gather things until she had enough
		
00:48:30 --> 00:48:34
			to distribute, while Asmaa would not keep anything
		
00:48:34 --> 00:48:35
			for the next day.
		
00:48:36 --> 00:48:38
			Asmaa would not keep anything for the next
		
00:48:38 --> 00:48:38
			day.
		
00:48:39 --> 00:48:43
			Which tells you that, you know, generosity can
		
00:48:43 --> 00:48:47
			have different manifestations, and different people have different
		
00:48:47 --> 00:48:53
			ways of exhibiting that generosity.
		
00:48:54 --> 00:48:57
			Generosity is a state of being.
		
00:48:58 --> 00:49:00
			How you express it is different.
		
00:49:01 --> 00:49:02
			These are different etiquettes.
		
00:49:02 --> 00:49:04
			People have different ways of doing this.
		
00:49:05 --> 00:49:07
			They both have that state of being.
		
00:49:08 --> 00:49:11
			They both have it.
		
00:49:11 --> 00:49:14
			The quality of generosity, they both have it.
		
00:49:15 --> 00:49:16
			But every one of them have a different
		
00:49:16 --> 00:49:20
			rationale and different way of expressing and displaying
		
00:49:20 --> 00:49:21
			that generosity.
		
00:49:22 --> 00:49:26
			So some people like to have certain times
		
00:49:26 --> 00:49:33
			where, you know, they save, and then when
		
00:49:33 --> 00:49:35
			they have enough, they give.
		
00:49:36 --> 00:49:40
			And some people don't keep, you know, anything.
		
00:49:40 --> 00:49:45
			They just regularly give out the excess.
		
00:49:46 --> 00:49:48
			And as we said, they're giving out the
		
00:49:48 --> 00:49:48
			excess.
		
00:49:49 --> 00:49:53
			They need first to suffice the needs of
		
00:49:53 --> 00:49:57
			their households and their dependents, and then they
		
00:49:57 --> 00:50:01
			give out the excess or the surplus that
		
00:50:01 --> 00:50:04
			they may have.
		
00:50:05 --> 00:50:07
			But this is a good hadith to end
		
00:50:07 --> 00:50:09
			the chapter on sikhawatin nafs.
		
00:50:09 --> 00:50:11
			And I wanted to say that sikhawatin nafs
		
00:50:11 --> 00:50:15
			is not limited to monetary generosity.
		
00:50:15 --> 00:50:22
			In fact, monetary generosity may be the least
		
00:50:22 --> 00:50:27
			of the different forms of generosity.
		
00:50:29 --> 00:50:34
			Spending from your time, spending from your status,
		
00:50:35 --> 00:50:40
			your position, your influence, spending from your emotional
		
00:50:40 --> 00:50:44
			reserve, spending from your wisdom and your knowledge,
		
00:50:44 --> 00:50:51
			spending from your skills, all of this is
		
00:50:51 --> 00:50:52
			sikhawatin nafs.
		
00:50:52 --> 00:50:56
			Sikhawatin nafs, the generosity of spirit.
		
00:50:56 --> 00:51:00
			And the monetary part of it is certainly
		
00:51:00 --> 00:51:03
			an important part of it, but that's not
		
00:51:03 --> 00:51:04
			the most important part.
		
00:51:05 --> 00:51:09
			As we said before, if you give some
		
00:51:09 --> 00:51:13
			time to listen to someone who wants to
		
00:51:13 --> 00:51:15
			vent out, like an elderly person in the
		
00:51:15 --> 00:51:19
			masjid who wants to vent out or wants
		
00:51:19 --> 00:51:22
			to complain or wants to talk, wants to
		
00:51:22 --> 00:51:26
			chat, feels lonely, that may be even greater
		
00:51:26 --> 00:51:31
			than giving five dollars, you know, putting five
		
00:51:31 --> 00:51:33
			dollars in the donation box.
		
00:51:34 --> 00:51:37
			Wallahi, it sometimes is greater and sometimes is
		
00:51:37 --> 00:51:41
			more meaningful and more powerful than putting five
		
00:51:41 --> 00:51:41
			bucks.
		
00:51:41 --> 00:51:44
			It's very easy for wealthy people to put
		
00:51:44 --> 00:51:47
			five bucks or ten or twenty or one
		
00:51:47 --> 00:51:50
			hundred in the donation box, but many people
		
00:51:50 --> 00:51:55
			may be too stingy to sit down with
		
00:51:55 --> 00:51:57
			someone who needs to talk and listen to
		
00:51:57 --> 00:51:59
			them, even if they are not making much
		
00:51:59 --> 00:51:59
			sense.
		
00:51:59 --> 00:52:01
			Just sit down and listen to them.
		
00:52:02 --> 00:52:04
			That's sikhawatin nafs, generosity of spirit.