Haleh Banani – Gratitude – Part 2 of 2

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			Salaam Alaikum. Last time we were talking about gratitude and all the psychological health and
religious benefits. So now I'm going to recap on last week because I hope that it got you excited
enough to show gratitude. The psychological benefits range from having a really good positive
attitude to being a antidote to depression. So if you're feeling depressed, you start thinking about
the things that you're grateful for, and you start feeling a lot better there is it improves your
emotional health. So you start feeling good from the inside. And also it starts shifting your focus.
So all your attention goes on the things that are great in your life. As far as the health benefits,
		

			the health benefits was that it maximizes your medical treatment. So if you have an illness that
you're trying to combat, and you start increasing your gratitude that that will start affecting your
your treatment, it also makes you a lot more energetic, a lot more alert, and it will have, you will
have a healthier immune system, because you're not as stressed. And so you will be a healthier
person. And also it reduces your stress. If you're not so worried about making comparisons and
trying to keep up and complaining about your life, then you're going to be a lot less stressed. And
the last part was about the religious benefits. And they include that when you show gratitude, it is
		

			like a workout for your soul. So just the same way that you feel elated after a workout. When you
start using your thankful muscle, you will start feeling extremely elated. You Allah has promised
that he will increase your blessing. So if you show gratefulness and allow will increase your
blessings. The third one was that you will be rewarded. So every time you show things, you're
grateful for your spouse, you're grateful for your kids, you're grateful for your health, every time
you're showing gratefulness, you are being rewarded. And last was that you will be a generally more
optimistic person because as a believer, we always have to be optimistic. So now that you're excited
		

			about being grateful, we're going to talk about what to be grateful for, and how to go about showing
the gratefulness. Now let me ask you something, if someone was to give you a very expensive gift,
let's say it's let's say it's a Rolex watch. Or let's say it's a beautiful crystal from a from a
shop that you love, or a diamond, okay at several carat diamond, or even a car if they were to give
you this a very expensive gift. How would you feel? Okay, so as soon as you get the gift, there's
this feeling of gratitude, you want to thank the person who went out of their way to give you this
amazing gift ranging in price anywhere from a few $1,000 to $100,000, we would show that
		

			gratefulness, what about all the amazing gifts that Allah has given us all of the gifts that he's
given us, worth millions and millions of dollars. If we had, let's say, just the gift he has given
us in our body,
		

			it would be worth so much. How much would let's say a liver transplant call? How much would your
eyes be worth or your arm or a limb? When we start reflecting on this, we see that Allah has given
us millions of dollars worth of gifts, and how do we show our gratitude? Do we show enough gratitude
for all the amazing gifts that Allah has given us? Now as far as what to be grateful for, and the
first one I'm choosing is health. And actually, I did some research on the cost of different kinds
of transplants, just to bring our awareness because many times we don't start appreciating our
health or a body part until until something happens to it right. You don't appreciate having your
		

			good health until you fall. Ill let's take for example our teeth When was the last time that we said
and hamdulillah we have to imagine what eating would be like if we had no teeth and yet, we don't
ever show appreciation until you have to go to the dentist unless you have a cavity or you have a
filling. And so what I want to bring your focus to is that the things that we have are so precious.
If you were to replace just eight of your teeth that would cost $3,000 Okay, and if you were to get
all of your teeth redone, it would be 20
		

			$84,000 which is 134,000. Guinea, okay, just for your teeth alone. So the fact that we have teeth
and we can chew and we can enjoy all those scrumptious meals, this is such a blessing and we should
show gratitude for it. Now what about our heart? Okay, our heart is beating, it's speeding every
second without us even remembering to have it beat it is involuntary beating, and it's pumping so
much blood to our body. And what if our we need a heart transplant? Do you know that in the US, it
would cost $800,000 for a heart transplant, that means 4,480,000 gunay, just to have something that
we really we take for granted unless we have heart failure. And now let's take the intestines,
		

			intestine, which we never ever think about, okay, it does all its functioning, but we're never
really aware of it. If you had to do a transplant of urine tested, it would be at least a million
dollars, a million $100,000. And that equates to 6,169,000 kinase. All right. And this is what all
the blessings that we have. And we just had a friend of ours recently that came to Egypt who had to
have a kidney transplant, and a regular kidney transplant. First of all, you're on a waiting list.
And if you happen to be chosen, and if it matches up, then you're so lucky to be chosen but it's not
imagine just the idea of a transplant is $300,000 which is 1,660,000 kinase. Okay, so these are
		

			astronomical figures. And if you think about how we are blessed and these are just a few items that
I have chosen to get us to reflect on all the like the millions of dollars worth of gifts that Allah
has given us and we take for granted every single day. Now if you are suffering from your health,
and maybe that's the test that you're getting, there's no nothing to worry about because there's so
many other things to be grateful for. Allah says in the Quran in suits and nahen ayah number 78
hours have been left him in a shape on average 18 the smilla her Rahman and Rahim walawe who Raja
come in booni on Manhattan,
		

			Ala Moana chez janela como Sam our other thought as well as Ada de la Lakhan Tisch guru that Allah
says it is he who brought you forth from from the wombs of your mothers, when you knew nothing, and
he gave you hearing, and sight, intelligence and affection that you may give thanks. So Allah has
given us all of these amazing blessings, our sight, our hearing, and this is all just so that we
could be grateful. And I want you to just practice have a task. This is something I've done with my
kids where you blindfold either yourself or your children, blindfold them and have them do a simple
task. I mean, nothing dangerous, okay, but something that just finding their way to their room or
		

			just trying to find things from their doors, it is so difficult, and we have this blessing of our
eyesight. And and we really get very little thanks to it. What about our hearing, if you could not
hear the voice of your loved one if you could not hear your children laughing or your spouse telling
you that they love you or you couldn't hear all the amazing sounds of the Koran and listening to it
and learning. So this is something that we really need to be aware of and show a lot of gratefulness
for. Now, there's so many movies that focus on getting your wishes, right, and they always ask what
are your three wishes? And many times people's answers range from anywhere from has to do with
		

			attaining wealth or position or beauty or whatever it is, and you see that it's always about
something very superficial or materialistic.
		

			What the Prophet sallallahu Sallam said, and it's reported by almondbury in Tel Aviv and tada heap
on the authority of Abdullah Ibn Abbas, that the Prophet sallallahu Sallam said, there are four
gifts which if they're given to someone, he is given the good of the world and the hereafter. So
this is what the prophet sallallahu Sallam is saying that if you have these four things, then you
have at all so the four things that the Prophet sallallahu Sallam mentioned, number one, he
mentioned, a grateful heart that if you have a grateful heart, your content, regardless of your
conditions, you are happy here in this dunya and in the Hereafter, and you see people that
		

			regardless of what the
		

			circumstances or they could have been, they lived through a natural disaster, they could have a very
bad illness. I had a friend of mine who was just diagnosed with cancer and she had the most
incredible grateful heart, Mashallah. And she always said that I can tolerate anything as long as I
get answered those and I lay at home has she passed, passed away a few weeks ago. But it was such an
example, when someone has a heart like that, that they're grateful, regardless of the pain,
regardless of the financial pressures, regardless of any of the tests, then this is one of the gifts
that that will make them happy in dystonia. And so that was gift number one, gift number two is a
		

			mentioning tongue and mentioning time means that you're always busy remembering the blessings,
you're you're counting the blessings, because when someone is constantly doing the vicar of Allah,
and they're constantly thanking Allah, then they don't have the opportunity to do the, the
gossiping, they're not busy about what he said, she said, and they avoid all the head ons because
the Prophet sallallahu Sallam told us to incarcerate the tongue, that the tongue can be the thing
that can take us to the hellfire. Because many times people lie, people, they hurt one another, they
gossip they do all of these things. So if the tongue is busy doing the things that will earn sadaqa
		

			and will earn a lot of hassle not then they will be successful. Now the third thing, so he said, a
grateful heart and mentioning time. Third is a body which preserves patiently in face of a
tribulation, that you have maybe an illness that is very, very painful. Another individual that I
visited in the hospital, who was also diagnosed with cancer, and was in so much pain, young, young,
cousin of my husband's and he imagined less than 30 years old, and he was not able to move anymore.
But yet, he was so content, as we shed tears, he was smiling, and he was content about the power of
Allah. And so if we can be that kind of person who did, regardless of the test, and the
		

			tribulations, still his content, that would be amazing. And the fourth thing is that having a wife
who does not betray him, neither in herself nor in his property, so having a trustworthy wife and
knowing that you can trust her, this is amazing. So these are the four things out of all the wishes
and the gifts. These are the four things that will give you happiness in this dunya and the aka a
grateful heart and mentioning a body which preserves during tribulations and a wife who does not
betray you.
		

			I was just talking about the things to be grateful for and mentioned that health is such an
important thing, that all of our body is worth millions and millions of dollars worth of gifts that
Allah has given us. And if you stay tuned, we will continue talking about the many things that we
need to be grateful for. So stay tuned after these messages.
		

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			Dune satellite channel, welcome back. We're just talking about how being grateful for our body the
all the gifts that we've been given will fill your heart with so much joy, and that you will get so
much adger and blessings by remembering that and also, we were talking about how the Prophet
sallallahu Sallam said the four things if you have it, you have the best of this dunya and akhira,
which was a grateful heart mentioning the blessings and a body that preserves patiently and also a
wife who does not betray you. Now the next thing to be grateful for which we usually never think
about is being sane having our sanity. This is something that we really take for granted. I used to
		

			work in a psychiatric hospital in Houston, in the locked unit site dealt with the severely psychotic
patients, and this made me be so appreciative of our sanity and I think that all of us needs to take
some time and be appreciative of that.
		

			It is also such an important blessing to be guided imagine imagine how we are saved from so much
head on so many things that happen that could happen if we were not on the straight path because we
have our enough right we have enough our inner selves
		

			We have the whispering of Satan and the shaytaan. And they're all coming at us. And if we don't
have, if we are not grounded by our religion, if we don't have some sense of accountability towards
God, then we could take so many different paths. And you see that there are a lot of people who live
their life like that. They just follow their desires, whatever they feel like they do. And they end
up having so many like numerous problems, whether it's health issues, maybe they will go into drugs,
and alcohol, and going having multitude of partners, and all these things, we are protected, just
because of the fact that we are guided that if being on the straight path and not worshiping anyone,
		

			other than the Creator, this is something really to be grateful for and knowing your purpose for
existence. Because there are so many there been philosophers, years and years of philosophers
dwelling over is this, the subject of why do we exist, and yet, you could ask, let's say, a four or
five year old Muslim child, and they will tell you we were created to worship our Creator. And so
this is really a blessing to have guidance and to be protected from all of the forbidden things.
Another thing to be grateful for is your family. Now, I know that sometimes family members can be
challenging, and there can be sometimes tension and issues. But just think about what it would be
		

			like not to have your extended family people who've known you since you were a child who love you,
and accept you, as you are. Think about like individuals who are orphans, and they don't have that
and how empty they feel. Or sometimes when you move far, far away, and you're away from all your
family members, the longing you have to be with them. So I think we need to take the time and
appreciate all our family members be a force to unify especially, I think, we need to be very
careful with unifying our husband's family, and that there are many times that wives may pull the
husband away. And so we as Muslim sisters, we need to make sure that we're a unifying force, that we
		

			are not only taking care of our family, but also the family of our spouse and making them a part of
our lives. It's also important to be very appreciative of the educational opportunities across
Africa, the illiteracy rate in some parts are up to 50%. Imagine 50% of the population in some parts
of Africa cannot read and write. And so what is going to be their destiny, what are they going to
end up doing? So the fact that you and I have had the blessing and the opportunity to go to school
to get educated and to be able to read and write and so many other things. This is really a blessing
that not everyone gets to enjoy. The next thing to be appreciative of is security. Security also is
		

			one of those things that unless it is somehow jeopardized, you don't appreciate it. And we just
recently with the demonstrations going on here in Egypt, we all sense that we saw that we just took
it for granted the idea of being safe in your home and not not having anything to worry about is
something that you really take for granted until your security is somehow shaken. So we need to just
be appreciative of the fact that we can go out of our home and we're not going to be attacked or
when we're sleeping at night no one is going to come in barging into your home. So these are things
to definitely be grateful for. One more thing to be appreciative about is all the beauty in the
		

			world like Allah has created such amazing things and I always am always grateful for the fact that
this is something that my mom really helped me to appreciate every little thing so as as I'm walking
and I see whether it's flowers or the trees or something beautiful I take note of and I think it's
so important because I will see a person who is seeing the same kind of beauty but not acknowledging
it a lot and it really makes a difference in our in our mood it when we are seeing all the beauties
and searching for the beauty it affects it affects our outlook on life.
		

			And also not only in searching for the the beauty in nature and the things around us, but also
looking and searching for the beauty in each individual because each person is unique and each
person has a special gift to offer. And instead of being prejudiced against them or judging or hot
looking for negativity, try to
		

			Search for something positive in a person, I think if you started doing that, you'll be a much
happier and grateful person. Because we many times are trained to look and capture all the flaws and
other people, whether it's our, whether it's our family members, whether it's our employees or our
employer, where's like searching out the negativity. So let's try to undo that. I know that it's
difficult if you're in the pattern of doing this, but if you try and train yourself or you're, you
have someone very difficult in front of you, okay, but you just ask what is good about this person?
Remember, last time I was talking about how powerful questions are. So if you have a person in your
		

			life, you could just talk about what is it that I can learn from this person? Okay. Sometimes there
are individuals in our life that are amazing. And so they have so many wonderful qualities, and you
can learn to emulate those qualities Other times, there are qualities that a person has that will
teach you not to be like that. Okay? There's a Persian proverb that says, Who did you learn
etiquette from his from the person who has no etiquette whatsoever. So when you see them slobbering
and eating messy, you feel like oh, my God, I don't want to look like that. So you learn to have
etiquette. And I actually, when I was getting my training in, at the hospital, I had a supervisor.
		

			And at first it was a little bit frustrating, because she just did not have the characteristics that
I wanted to emulate. And I saw that she treated the patients with, with harshness, there was no
compassion. And so I started, I turned it around, I thought, What can I learn from this woman? Okay,
she's my supervisor, and I'm here, what what can I learn, and I started seeing all the things not to
do, because it's just as important to know what not to do. And I think that taught me so much about
having compassion for the people, I work with having respect. And I saw such a difference in the
treatment, when I would go in with and work with a client that she warned me about. But because I
		

			showed them respect and compassion, there was they were so much more receptive. And so we can learn
from all the people around us. And we just have to ask the right question by saying, what is it that
I can learn from this person and what is good about them, okay, and other than other than seeing the
good and the beauty around us, and in the people around us, we can also be appreciative of all the
blessings that Allah has given us, in all the delicious, scrumptious food that we have. And this is
something a lot of times we take for granted because we have so much blessings. And yet you find
people who are dying every not sure how many minutes, but there is someone dying, I believe, every
		

			four minutes from hunger. And so this is something that we take for granted. So we just need to be
very appreciative. I've even seen children sometimes going into a trial, trash dumpster trying to
look for food, and it breaks my heart. And when we see things like this, it makes us one take action
to want to do something for them and to also be very appreciative for every morsel of food that
we're able to put into our mouth. Now it's about how do we show this gratefulness? Okay, so maybe I
convinced you, you're excited about being grateful and you know what to be grateful for. But how do
you show it, the first thing is write it Okay, write it have a growing list, if you have this list
		

			that you keep adding on to it, I told you, I do this with my my clients that come in who are
suffering from depression, and they start writing down all the things they're grateful for. And they
just that alone makes them feel so much better. Second thing is Say it Say it meaning that you have
a need to speak of your blessings if you have something and now you have to be careful with this
because you don't want to be let's say telling a starving person about this amazing buffet that you
just had. Okay, so you some wisdom, that when you talk about your blessing, you're not talking about
the blessing in front of someone who is deprived of it but it is important to remember it and to
		

			speak of it. So we said write it say it now the third thing is show it show it is by thanking others
and expressing how much you you are grateful for them. Because feeling appreciated is something that
every human being is in need of every single person if you can show appreciation to other
individuals
		

			You will have them so contented and wanting to do more and more for you. And this is something that
is, it has to be genuine, of course. But if you show appreciation to your spouse, if they have
cooked the meal show appreciation instead of like picking out what's wrong with it. So appreciation,
show your spouse, you're appreciative that they're going to work and providing a beautiful life for
you. And just have this habit of sharing and thanking the people in your life. Feeling gratitude and
not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving yet so this is a saying from William
award that so if you feel gratitude, give it to them, because imagine you have a gift that is all
		

			packed and you don't give it to the person. The next thing is ask it ask what am I most grateful
for? Okay, so he said, also prove it the way you prove it is like obedience to God when you are
grateful. That means it should lead to obedience.
		

			And it's just like with parents that if you if you want to show that you're very appreciative of
your parents, it's not enough just to say, Okay, thank you. It's about being obedient. The more you
listen to them, the more you're showing that you're grateful. So again, as a recap, the ways to show
gratefulness is to write it, say it, show it, ask It and Prove it. So these are the five ways to no
excuses. Now you know what to be grateful for, you know, the benefits of being grateful and then how
to show your gratefulness. So inshallah this increases us in showing our gratefulness. So it's like
a law fair as salaam alaikum
		

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