Haleh Banani – Crush The Last 10 Days of Ramadan #14

			Alright, so I like Bismillah was salat wa salam ala rasulillah it is the last 10 days, and I want to
help you, I want to empower you. And I want to give you all the psychological tools and
methodologies to crush the last 10 days. So let me know in the comment section if you are in say me
if you're ready to crush the last 10 days in sha Allah. Alright, so everything that we do in life is
based on seeking pleasure or avoiding pain, everything you can think of. And we do more to avoid
pain than to seek pleasure. And for everything that we do, there are four consequences for
consequences. All right. So there's either short term pain or short term pain, I'll give you some
		

			examples so that you can relate to this short term pain is going to the gym, okay, that can be
painful, short term pain is sitting and studying till like two o'clock in the morning for a test.
All right, or you can have short term pleasure short term pleasure is having a pie piece of a pie or
a whole pie. Or it could be you know what I'm going to skip class today I'm going to just sleep in,
there's long term pain, long term pain is you know, let's say you just ignore your health. And you
end up with some major illnesses. The major long term pain is going to the Hellfire not seeking done
long term pleasure is let's say someone who has studied so hard, and they finally achieve their
		

			success. And they have a career or the ultimate long term pleasure is attaining, Jenna, right? So
everything that we do can fall into one of these categories, right? And so we need to recognize how
much time are we spending in those short term pleasures? You know, the things that we do the things
that just makes us, you know, we enjoy it for a little bit. But what about the long term pain, don't
forget that. And what this does, what we do the last 10 days, is that it puts everything into
perspective. It helps us to focus on that long term pleasure, the long term pleasure of attaining
Jenna, we need to put our short term pleasures aside, we need to put focus a little bit on the short
		

			term pain, maybe the staying up at night, maybe pushing ourselves and that will help us to attain
the long term pleasure. And you know, purpose is your soul's oxygen, without a sense of purpose,
your soul will be gasping will be gasping for air until it gets it. You know, I have so many clients
who come in, and they have a happy marriage. They may have healthy kids and abundance of wealth, but
they are slowly dying inside because they have no sense of purpose. And when a when a person has a
sense of purpose, and everything is so much more enjoyable. They feel like they they wake up in the
morning with excitement with motivation. And so you need to have a compelling reason. You need to
		

			have a compelling reason to do anything challenging. And you need to find your why. Why is it
important to crush the last 10 days for you? Why is it you know, give me Why don't you write down
and communicate with me? Why do you think it's so important? What is your compelling reason to have
this last 10 days be so important to you? Right? So one of the things you can think about is the
fact that many of us have lost loved ones this past year this past year alone, my husband and I lost
five family members within three months. Okay. Those were challenging tests. And what happened was
that these individuals thought that they would make it to this Ramadan they thought that not only
		

			will they make it to this Ramadan, they have many years to come. They didn't think that they're
going to all of a sudden have a heart attack. They didn't think that they're going to all of a
sudden die of this illness. They have no idea and who knows how they spent their last Ramadan maybe
that was the Ramadan that they slacked off maybe that was the Ramadan that they didn't really get
into it. So for you and I we need to have our compelling reason is that this could be our last
Ramadan this could be our these could be our last 10 days. So when you look at it and you think that
this is our my last 10 days, how would you live your life? How would you spend it? Would you spend
		

			it surfing the net? Would you spend it watching videos? Or would you be begging for forgiveness?
Would you be weeping with the sense of connection and who shoe with every prayer every sujood be
more meaningful?
		

			If you felt that this is truly your last Ramadan, ever, and that's why when you have a compelling
reason, and that is I want to make the most of this Ramadan, I want to make this as if it is my
last. And that when you have that feeling, I tell you, you're not even going to need to you don't
need to motivate yourself when you have that why when you know why you're going to do something and
you have a compelling purpose, you're going to jump out of bed, you're going to run to that or on
you're going to do things and that's why it's so important to understand the psychological ways of
programming yourself and, and training yourself so that all this will be so easy in sha Allah. Okay,
		

			so epinal Chelsea said, that race horse knows that it is nearing the end of the track, it exerts all
of its effort to win the race, do not allow the race horse to be more clever than you For verily
deeds are judged by their conclusions. So if you didn't do well, with welcoming Ramadan, then
perhaps you will do better bidding it for a while. How beautiful is that? How beautiful is what even
though Chelsea has said that it is our deeds are judged by not the way we started, because many of
you I'm sure are very maybe frustrated, maybe disappointed maybe guilty. You know, a lot of clients
will tell me I just this Ramadan was just not the same. I have my kids home, I'm overwhelmed. I have
		

			so much going on. I wasn't able to do much. Well, I'm telling you now take all that guilt, take all
that frustration, take all that anger and channel it, channel it into the last 10 days say okay, I
messed up, I wasn't as good as I want it to be. But now I'm going to push forward. Okay, how many of
you are going to push forward and have a good ending? Okay, say me. All right, because we want to
really get motivated and make sure that we are finishing the race strong. finishing the race is the
most important thing, it doesn't matter. Even when you find people who are running a race, they
could be sprinting, they could be way ahead, and then someone from the back will just come speed up
		

			and beat everybody, you be that person that doesn't matter how far behind you are, doesn't matter
what just euro doesn't matter what you did the past two weeks, it's how you finish the race. And
that's what I want you to focus on. Okay, how's that, as best we said, improve your performance and
what is left of time, and you will be forgiven for that which has already passed. So take special
care of the time you have left. Because you don't know when your soul will be turned over to Allah's
mercy, we don't know, we don't know if we're gonna make it to this evening. But at least if we have
the intention right now, you and I, let's make the intention that I am going to make this the best
		

			last 10 days of my life, I'm going to crush these last 10 days, it's going to be so powerful, that
is just not going to compare with anything else I've ever done. And when you have that intention,
even if our souls are taken away from us, right this minute,
		

			it's written for us, it will we will count I will count for us as if we did the way we had the last
10 days. inshallah. Now what I want to introduce you is having a spiritual mission statement, a
spiritual mission statement we have, we have businesses, there are businesses or schools will have a
mission statement, right? You can't have a business without having a vision. You can't run a school
without thinking this is what we stand for this is what's important to us. And yet we go through
life without a spiritual mission statement. We go through life and our whole purpose is to worship
Allah, our whole purpose is to attain gender. And yet, and yet we don't even have that spiritual
		

			mission statement to tell us, you know, what we need to focus on. Usually, it's not even a mission
statement is just the list. It's a list, I need to do this, I'm going to do this, and you just check
off the list and then you think you're done. But this mission statement, I want you to put some
time, effort and energy into it. And what it needs to do is that it needs to encompass your
commitment to not just worship
		

			but have the worship transform your character, right. We need the character transformation, because
all of us know people who have read the Koran, maybe 20 times. Some people do multiple times in the
Ramadan. We know people who have PhDs we know people who have you know they are whether it is Scott
		

			Or titles or whatever it is, we know people like that. And yet, they may treat people unkindly. They
may, back by they may slander, they may not do what's just, and what is the problem there? Is it a
lack of worship? Is it a lack of understanding? Is it a lack of knowledge? No, it is a lack of
taking all that and improving the character. That is what is missing. And that is why this mindful
Ramadan has been all about transforming our character. Because unless we work on our character, then
the amount of worship that we do is going to not serve us completely, definitely, we'll get the
reward, we get reward for reading the Quran, absolutely. But how much more reward will you get, if
		

			you actually read it, understand it and then implement it? How much more valuable will those prayers
be? If that means that it transforms your character into having more patience, and having more love
and having more forgiveness within your relationships, I feel that we're only taking a portion of
the reward, we're only taking a portion of this reward, when we are only checking off our list. We
need to take all of that and think to ourselves, how can I become a better person. And that mission
statement needs to encompass that, that I'm going to take my worship, I'm going to take all this and
I'm going to become a refined individual, I'm going to have a character that is worthy, that is just
		

			so impeccable, that it will be emulating the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam. And the crap
character transformation is the pot of gold most people miss out on, they're just busy. They're just
busy checking, ticking, ticking, and they miss out on that transformation. So don't be one of the
people who simply do a long list of deeds without reflecting and making yourself beautifying your
character. So there's three steps, three steps to make your dreams, your dreams about having this
amazing. Last 10 days, your dreams about ascending spiritually, your dreams about being the best
version of yourself. There are three steps into our reality. Okay, first and foremost, you have to
		

			take inventory of yourself, take inventory of who you are. Okay? Now, you've got to be very honest
with yourself, you have to be honest and recognize what is it? Who are you? What are your
shortcomings? What can you improve? What has held you back? Why haven't you reached your goals,
right? And when you're truly honest with yourself, that's when you can make the change, okay. And
that's why I tell my clients who come in, I'm like, you know what, you're halfway there. Just the
fact that you're admitting that you have a problem. You're halfway there. Most people are in denial,
a lot of people think that they don't have anything to work on. And that is the biggest
		

			misconception thinking that you have nothing to work on is the biggest misconception. And that's
when you actually lose, you lose. When you think you know, enough, you lose when you think that
there's nothing to improve within yourself. Because at any given time, there are at least five to
six different things that I could work on myself and I can improve myself. And so if we have that
mindset, if we know that we can improve then that really sets that really sets of for us that we can
just recognize what shortcomings we have. So then the second, you know, that we need to have. Second
thing is have the right mindset, have the right mindset. Focus on what you will do, not what you
		

			won't do. Okay? A lot of times people are like, well, I won't do this. And I won't do that. I'm not
going to be lazy. You know what the brain does. When you make a statement like that. The negative
word is canceled out. Okay? And all you're saying you're you are it's like a mantra. So it's like
someone saying, I'm not going to eat junk, don't eat junk, what don't is canceled on you're saying
eat junk, eat junky junk, and then some people will come and tell me, you know, I feel like my brain
is working against me. It's like, No, no, you just don't know how to talk to your brain. Okay? So
you need to focus on what you will do, not what you won't do. Okay? And the third thing is to set
		

			SMART goals. Okay, smart. This is the acronym. The S is to be specific. You got to be specific,
okay? Instead of saying I'm going to I'm going to read a bunch of you know, I'm going to
		

			A bunch of baronne can No, I'm going to read this many pages. And then it has to be the M is for
measurable, it has to be measurable. If someone says, I want to be more spiritual art, can you
measure spirituality, I want to be more content, you've got to have something that is measurable,
right? And so and then a, it has to be attainable. If you set something impossible, and you can
achieve it, you're just going to set yourself up for failure. So it's got to be something
attainable, the R is for relevant. Set a relevant goal right now, it's the last 10 days, you know,
we're focusing on worship or work, we are focusing on self improvement and character transformation.
		

			And then you start to, you know, make plans for cleaning out your closet, it's not relevant, right,
so stick to relevant plans, and then the T is for time bound, you've got to have a deadline, all of
us work with deadlines, okay. So if you could write down in the chat, the SMART goals, okay, and
what it stands for, so you guys can remember. So S is for specific, M is for measurable, A is for
attainable, R is for relevant, and T is for time bound, okay? So it set these goals. And now you
have, you know, the pain and pleasure, right, we work through that we have a compelling reason why
this might be my last Ramadan. And now we have the right mindset where it's like, I am going to
		

			crush this I want, I'm going to focus on what I can achieve. And you've taken inventory of yourself.
And now you have these smart goals. Okay. And then I want to tell you about setting some practical,
right, some practical steps, because that part of it was the most important, okay, and that's the
part we never get, right? We're just told, stay up, stay up all night, finish reading the are on, do
your takeoff. But then there's a whole psychology behind why one person is able to do that, and
another person, just slacks off. And so I've given you the psychology behind how to how to propel
yourself to take those actions. And so now I'm going to give you some of the more practical steps.
		

			Okay, so some of the practical stuff. First of all, it's just this concept of, you know, taking a
vacation for a law. You know, we take summer vacation, we take spring vacations, we do all sorts of
winter vacation, when have you taken a vacation for a law, and this idea of dedicating your time and
this year Alhamdulillah, Messiah tabernacle, I had the opportunity to do that. And I've taken some
days to really focus and put myself that not just the service of Allah, but also just the top board,
reflecting, learning and improving. And so this idea of really dedicating time, dedicating time to
just self improvement and understanding and learning our religion and applying it, it's just, it's
		

			just beautiful. It's such a beautiful thing to do. Now, I understand in the many years past, I
wasn't able to do that. And so maybe you're restricted with your work with your kids. And you can't
do that. And I don't want you to feel discouraged, you can make the NEA to do and take off right and
tick off. It's like that time you are dedicating purchase alone time with Allah. Now many times
people do the takeoff, in in the masjid, okay, and doing it at the masjid is, is beautiful. And I
have amazing, amazing memories of taking my kids. And we were in Houston, I would do antique cars
and stay up all night and, and it was just one of the most amazing memories growing up and having
		

			the kids grow up. And you can do it either at the message or you can go by yourself or for women,
what is really special and you know, the special privileges that we have is that if you have kids at
home, and you're not able to go to the message, you can do it to cuff in your own home. So you
designate a place you say I am now in my time of intercom you have you're on your reading, you're
making the eye you're doing your prayers, and that counts for you. It's not beautiful. And so if we
have that sense of, you know, just making the intention of I'm going to have this time Allah, it
could be it could be 30 minutes, it could be two hours, it could be four hours, whatever it is,
		

			don't be little, don't be little what you're doing because I know there had been stages in my life
that I was consumed with little children. And I couldn't do the let's say what the amount of worship
that I wanted to do but you know what's amazing with the content
		

			concept of worship in, in Islam is that it's comprehensive, it is comprehensive. And everything that
you do is counted as worship, if you do it with the right intention, you do it with a good, you
know, with a good attitude. And when you do that, then it's so it's all counted as worship for you.
So don't be little it. And if you're working, and if you are not able to do as much, what I would
say is keep your tongue moist with the remembrance of Allah, you know, continuously do that they can
continuously do that as the hot, you know, you can always do to ob and stack the worship, stacking
the worship means that say you're already doing the prayer, add the reading of Koran with each
		

			prayer. And this makes it easier, it's not just establishing a new behavior or a new habit, you're
stacking it on to a previous habit that you already had. And I would really recommend that, you
know, in addition to reading the varad, and completing the Quran, please take some time to read the
translation, please take some time to understand that. I mean, really, there are few people I mean,
there are people who are, you know, maybe just fluent in Arabic and everything that they read, they
understand. But I know that many of my Arab friends and many of you know people that I know that
even if they're educated, they may not understand all the verses, right. And so taking that time to
		

			read it and to understand that it's just going to be so much more meaningful and powerful. And so
		

			I have made it a commitment this year, instead of just focusing on completing it, is by learning it,
understanding it, and making sure that that's that's what's gonna affect my heart, by by
understanding the verses is what is going to make me change my character. I think part of the
problem in people not having maybe the right character is that they're just focused on the worship,
I got to finish the are on Now what did I learn? What did I understand what am i does not have none
of that has been maybe as important. But we're going to make it important this year, this year with
the last 10 days, we're going to take even if it's one page, let's say you want to read 10 pages,
		

			fast super speed is like some people do. But take that one page where you read it, you read the you
know translation, you read the tough steed and really say I'm going to implement at least one thing,
and that's going to be powerful. And you know, doing one of my favorite were acts of worship in
especially in Ramadan is when you you pray fudger right. And you could do it at home if you're a
woman or at the masjid and you stay reading the Koran making dawn till shutup time and that's about
an hour after fudger praying to rock rockets, okay, just two rockets of Doha prayer and you get the
reward of Hajj and Umrah. It's so merciful, like Allah is just so generous. So if we do that,
		

			imagine the last 10 days that's like 10 had an ombre and that amazing and really look out for the
odd nights. But you know, I know that the odds night are very special, but every night is special.
So don't only go don't only exert yourself on the odd nights, just make it like your effort. Try to
make it each day even like giving a little bit of setup. You know, in talking about South Africa, we
have a beautiful setup program that is going on 100% of the donations going to the matter of Dallas.
They are doing an amazing job providing food for refugees. There's homeless, there are homeless,
homeless Muslims. And this one story that really touched my heart was the Syrian brother. He
		

			actually wasn't Syria, and there was a bombing and he lost two of his siblings. He came to the US
ended up in Dallas. Matt have helped them it. They helped them they got him on his feet. He got a
job in construction. Within a few months he fell and he broke every bone in his body, every bone in
his body had like these nails in it and supine Allah because that'll help them because that he they
were there for him. He had such a positive outlook and he's like, you know what, I am going to
recover from this. I'm going to make it and he did. And just last week he came to matter of and he
said you know what, look, I'm cured, I've made it. So they are changing lives every single day and
		

			if you give your psychotic Money, Your donation will go directly to them. So I really hope that you
help this cause we are right now Mashallah Tabata cola $22,000 we have raised for them where our
goal is, you know, by this week, if we can do 30,000 and if we wanted to give as much as we can, and
I want you to know that what we're learning
		

			In these, you know, the mindful Ramadan about changing ourselves about improving, you know,
character transformation, it can't be squeezed, you can't have a crash course on character
transformation. It is something that goes on, you know, it's a year long lifelong project. And that
is why I created the mindful Hearts Academy which is my mentorship program and it's been going on
for now the past two years Mashallah Tabata Kala to run marathons ago, I decided that I really want
to dedicate my time and my energy in mentoring individuals who just to be the best version of
themselves as to, you know, reach their full potential to build the self esteem to gain emotional
		

			intelligence. And this is what I've been dedicated to the past two years, every week coming online.
And these are all exclusive material. It is, it is not a bunch of my old videos, because you know,
someone actually suggested that I said, you know, people can get my videos online and for free, I
want to do exclusive material, I want it to be really rich. And I really want it to be what what's
really revolutionary about is that I made the self development just so affordable and so accessible.
So, in sha Allah, if you want to take this character transformation to the next level, if you want
to really be serious about emulating the Prophet salallahu alaihe salam and you want to be the best
		

			version of yourself, join us on the mindful Hearts Academy and the registrations are now open and
you will be in in the greatest company Mashallah the sisterhood there is phenomenal. And what we see
is that everyone is supporting one another It is really what sisterhood is meant to be unfortunately
within our community sometimes we don't really see much of that sisterhood there are some special
beautiful sisters definitely. But overall you find that there's a lot of you know, competitiveness,
there's a lot of pettiness, there's a lot of, you know, backstabbing going on. And you know, we have
created a community that is safe, that is welcoming, that will encourage you that will pray for you.
		

			I mean, support Allah, any sister that comes on, and she puts on something that you know, she's
she's going through a divorce, everyone pours their love, and they pour dough on someone, their
child is sick, the same thing. Oh, I'm, you know, I'm struggling, I don't feel good about myself.
Everyone builds her up, oh, I achieved this, I passed my test everyone celebrating. So this is
really what sisterhood is supposed to be like. And we're demonstrating it here on the mindful Hearts
Academy. And it's, you know, it's it's nine phases I do live every, every week. And Alhamdulillah.
It is it is really a it's powerful. It's powerful. Because I give you the step by step in building
		

			your self esteem the step by step and how to have relationships and how to build, build yourself,
build others, and what I have heard, and those of you sisters who are on who are part of the mindful
Hearts Academy, please give your feedback because these are the sisters who have been on and they've
transformed themselves. And it's been it's been a beautiful journey. And we would love for you to
join us it is the mindful hearts.com Registration is open and I really pray that Allah will bless
all of us to experience les little pad. We didn't mention, we did mention it briefly. But Laila, as
you know, it is it's phenomenal. How generous Allah is and when we exert ourselves, right? It is
		

			like with 1000s of years and months of worship, so we
		

			Yeah, I'll say Alfie Shara is better than 1000 months of worship. So imagine one night and we'll get
so many rewards. So May Allah give us a little God May Allah help us to really crush these last 10
days of Ramadan, May Allah help us to transform our character, to not just do a list of worship, but
to really take that worship and to really improve ourself and your love. May Allah help us to
emulate the Prophet salallahu alaihe salam in our behavior in our treatment of others and in the way
that we interact in sha Allah to sakala Hayden for you know, for tuning in and share this with your
friends with your family, because the last 10 days are upon us and you know, every single person who
		

			benefits from this and applies it you will share in the rewards so please let me know in the
comments section, what you're going to do what your goal is, and and how ready are you to crush the
last 10 days in sha Allah does not call
		

			Lafayette and for tuning in, I really appreciate it.