Haifaa Younis – Building My Eternal Abode – Part 4 I
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Ramadan done, day of Eid.
Every less became more.
True or false?
Yes or no?
I eat more, I talk more, I sleep
more.
I'm too tired, Alhamdulillah.
There's no Taraweeh, I'm gonna go and sleep.
And during the day, it's day off, I'm
gonna sleep more.
Oh, it's Eid.
Oh, I'm gonna visit this.
Let's go out this.
Let's go to this coffee shop.
Let's go this, let's all more.
When these are more, natural result, this will
be less.
It's only 24 hours in the day.
I can't make it 48 after Ramadan.
Right?
So the most important thing, and this is
my choice, your choice, our choice.
Who do I feed?
And what do I give them?
Every haram I look at, remember the reverse.
Every haram I look at, the nafs is
stronger.
The heart becomes weaker.
Every haram I listen to, let alone I
say it.
My heart is weaker.
Every time, every day pass without the remembrance
of Allah.
I say this to my heart, poor heart,
you're way weaker today.
So the qalb, my focus, for me as
a Muslim woman or Muslims in general, a
person who's focused on her akhira, wants to
go to jannah.
And if I can see you better, I'm
sure if I asked you, do you wanna
go to jannah, everybody will raise two hands,
not one.
As a person focused on Allah, focused on
her journey, wants to be better.
If you didn't wanna be better, you would
not be here today.
There's so many other things I can do
on a Saturday.
I can just catch up on my sleep.
So don't let shaitan do this to you.
But we are all on a different path.
On the same path, but different stations.
And sometimes me, Saturday I'm in a station,
or maybe Monday I'm a little bit back.
But it doesn't matter, I'm still on the
path.
We beg him every day, minimum 17 times
a day.
Why?
If it was not easy, he would not
have asked me to ask him.
If it was not hard, he would not
have asked me to beg him, guide me.
Meaning I can't do it alone.
So remember this parable.
When too much, too much, this is weaker.
That's why you see people now, unfortunately, falling
more into anxiety and depression.
It's not because their faith is weak.
But it's because my nafs is getting so
spoiled.
When we say, I don't know what you
say in Britain, but in the States we
say this word, spoiled rotten, everything like it.
Look at the child, spoiled rotten.
Anything they want, the mother gives him or
her.
Or the dad, or the parents, or the
grandparents.
This young child will grow up, life is
very difficult for him or her.
Because they are used to take it.
Anything they want, it's given.
Now life doesn't give me everything when I
grow up.
And then I become miserable.
That's my nafs.
Train your nafs to be your slave.
Not the other way around.
Train your nafs to be your slave.
Not the other way around.
I have the full control, what I'm going
to say, no coffee this morning.
What I like it, I'm sorry, you're not
getting everything you like.
Don't we say this to our children?
It's the same concept.
Actually, it's the same concept.
Again, scholars of Tazkiyah will teach you.
The famous Imam al-Busayri, the poet, who
wrote the famous poem about praising the Rasul.
He starts in the beginning, not talking about
the Rasul.
He starts talking about Tazkiyah.
And he said, وَالنَّفْسُ كَالطَّفْلِ إِن تَهْمِلْهُ شَبَّعْ
لَا حُبُّ الرَّضَاعِ وَإِن تَفْطِمْهُ يَنْفَطْمِي The nafs,
the I in me, is like a child.
وَالنَّفْسُ كَالطَّفْلِ Child.
إِن تَهْمِلْهُ شَبَّعْ لَا حُبُّ الرَّضَاعِ If you're
going to keep him doing what he or
she wants, they're going to be breastfeeding all
the time.
وَإِن تَفْطِمْهُ يَنْفَطْمِي And if you're going to
train him to stop breastfeeding, he or she
will stop breastfeeding.
That's what I need.
The reason it's becoming more difficult for us,
because everything is available.
Everything is, sometimes it's even free.
Buy one, get one free.
And الحمد لله, and I am just, may
Allah make me grateful.
And all of us, all of us living
in the West, things are accessible within our
hands.
If you were with me in Gaza, almost
a month and a half ago, you will
know what it means, what you need to
train your nafs.
When there is no food, other than that
piece of that can, in Ramadan, that can,
and Allah knows what it tastes.
And if you got that piece of bread,
ya Allah, let alone doing wudu in a
water that tastes good.
Ten days we did wudu in the most
toughest taste of water I have ever done,
tasted.
It's directly from the sea.
It is so bitter.
The last day I got so much used
to it.
And that's why when I look at the
people of Gaza, and I literally wondered for
ten days.
There is nobody I talked with, didn't ask
them this question.
How can you do it?
Can you live this like this?
And even I looked at them, and I
said, here I am.
The spoiled one, may Allah forgive her, coming
from America.
Everything is available.
You want apple?
There is ten choices you are going to
make.
You want to drink something?
Which one?
Versus nothing.
You take what you get.
There is no other option.
I still remember the third day when we
were fasting, and they knocked on our door,
we were living in the hospital, and says,
there is somebody who brought food.
And this is for you.
What was the food?
We didn't know, but it was hot.
And I was telling my roommate, ya Allah,
hot food.
And it was covered, there is no plates.
It was covered in a, in the cellophane
paper, in the wrap.
And we opened it, it was hot, cooked.
The first hot cooked meal I had after
three days.
And it's Ramadan.
And your suhoor is protein bars.
We brought it with us.
And I remember we opened, and there was
no rice, because they don't have rice.
Something similar to rice, very popular there.
And I remember I put my fork.
I'm saying it to you, and I'm seeing
it again.
And my fork got stuck in something at
the bottom.
And I looked at my roommate, and I
said, I think I'm feeling the meat.
And I picked it up.
And it was this piece of meat.
It, see my finger?
Not even, I don't think it was two
of them.
It was maybe one and a half.
I looked it up and I said, Subhanallah,
meat.
Imagine where was my nafs.
Versus us?
Chicken, I don't like chicken.
Oh, fish, oh, doesn't taste good.
And I leave it.
And the plate, especially with the open buffet
concept, the plate is full of food.
Why?
And then I take a bite, and a
bite, and a bite, and everything is in
the garbage.
The poor heart, I say.
What happened to you?
I gave my nafs everything it wants.
And that is why you see, I told
them actually, one of them was a physician
actually.
He looked at me, and maybe day two
or three, I can't remember now.
And he said, we were prepared for this.
And I said, how can somebody get prepared
for this?
He said, when you live for at least
10 or 15 years with not having everything
you want for no reason, and this is
what he said, other than I was born
in the wrong place in the sight of
some people, I'm ready for anything comes my
way.
They had no issue waking up for Fajr.
Under, you have three options.
Under the drones, 24-7, or bombing, or
silence, which means something is coming our way.
This nafs of mine and yours needs to
be, I wouldn't say killed, spiritually, I would
say tamed.
Tamed.
You don't have to have three meals a
day.
Who said so?
I don't have to eat because it's one
o'clock.
I eat when I feel hungry.
There's a famous saying in the Arabic language.
I grew up actually on it.
We are a nation.
We don't eat until we are hungry.
And we don't get full when we eat.
We are a nation.
Let's talk about the Arabs.
I wish we are, all of us these
days.
We don't eat unless we are hungry.
And when we eat, we will never eat
to satiation, to full.
Oh, I can't have anymore.
Every time we do this, in everything I
want, including shopping, I will give you this,
which somebody taught me a long time ago.
When you go for shopping, number one, never
go for window shopping.
Never go for window shopping.
You will end up buying things you don't
need.
And now these days it's even harder because
it's online, you're in your bed, and just
a click, and you're done.
And next day or two days later, it's
at your door.
Imagine this, how spoiled this nafs is now.
And the poor heart.
Tell me, wake up for Fajr at 2
a.m. And when you go for shopping,
and this is very common, especially with the
youth, because it's fun.
I'll go with my friends.
We'll go window shopping.
You enter that store, whatever that store is,
and you look at something, and you like
it.
First question, to give life to your heart,
and keep your nafs under check.
Do you need it?
Do you need it?
The answer is, 99% of the time,
I'm not going to say 100%, but for
us living in the West, 99% of
the time, the answer is, no.
I don't need it.
But I like it, now the nafs feeding.
It's under sale.
It's for sale.
That's how they lure me, and you.
I want my qalb saleem.
I want you, literally, you leave today with
the three things of Allah, subhanahu wa ta
'ala, bless this gathering, and He will be,
idhnillah.
Number one, don't learn to do things for
Allah only.
Don't look at people, let alone you.
Number two, learn the concept of something called
qalb saleem, pure heart, that will take you,
zip you, or actually zap you and me,
to Jannah.
The third, which I'm going to spend the
rest of the time talking about it, what
kind of a heart do you have now?
Remember I said this in the beginning.
What kind of a heart do you have?
There's three kinds.
There's many definitions of the heart, but we'll
take it from the Quran.
It will be the easiest.
First one is a saleem, the goal, the
one that will take me directly to Jannah.
The opposite of a saleem, there's two opposites.
The extreme, and the less extreme.
Who can tell me what is the extreme?
Just say it.
Dead.
Dead spiritually.
Don't think of the heart, the pumping heart.
That's physical.
That will die with me.
That heart, the physical, six months, if somebody
opened my grave and yours, there will be
nothing.
Nothing.
You've seen the picture came from Palestine.
And after a year, not even a bone,
except one piece, where Allah will create me
back from it, or bring me back from
it.
So the spiritual heart is what we are
talking about.
What is a dead heart?
Or you wanna learn the sound heart?
Which one you want to learn first?
And in between, of course, it's gonna be
the sick one.
So there's three options.
And I can have these three in the
same day.
Me, not you.
Or I have the dead, she has the
salim.
No, no, no.
It is me, me.
In the morning, I could be spiritually dead.
Afternoon, I am completely pure.
In the evening, I went back and became
sick.
True or false?
How is that?
How can this swift changes happen?
Let's see if you paid attention to what
I said in the beginning.
What will change me?
Again, internally, don't look at people.
You know the selfie we're all crazy about
these days?
If I put the selfie on my heart,
literally, turn it on your heart.
What changes me?
I'm the same person.
It's the same city, home, job.
What changes anyone?
Aha, what do you feed?
What do you feed?
Not food.
Part of it is food also, by the
way.
But what influences you bought, you turned on,
you listened, you memorized, and fed this or
this?
Very simple.
True?
Let's start with the dead person, the dead
heart.
The dead heart, قلب الميت.
And Allah said it, أَوَمَنْ كَانَ مَيْتًا فَأَحْيَيْنَاهُمْ
وَجَعَلْنَا لَهُ نُورًا يَمْشِي بِهِ فِي النَّاسِ كَمَنْ
مَثَلُهُ فِي الظُّلُمَاتِ لَيْسَ بِخَارِجٍ مِّنْهَا Allah said
this in Surah Al-An'am, the cattle.
He gave the two parables.
The person who's dead, spiritually.
And then we gave him life back again.
Meaning?
Guidance.
Hidayah.
Quran.
Sunnah.
Obedience to Allah.
All this gives life to you.
Think of you in Ramadan.
You.
Don't think of anybody else.
You.
Is that person the same?
Allah is saying it.
أَوَمَنْ كَانَ مَيْتًا فَأَحْيَيْنَاهُمْ وَجَعَلْنَا لَهُ نُورًا What
is the light?
Light is usually Quran and Sunnah.
كَمَنْ مَثَلُهُ فِي الظُّلُمَاتِ Is this person the
same as the person who's in darkness?
I can barely see you?
Is it the same when you are seeing
me like I am seeing you?
No.
The top people, I barely can see you.
Why?
Because my eyes in darkness there.
But you all can see me.
Why?
Because I'm standing in light.
What light you have that your heart is
seeing and following.
They are not the same.
The dead is the following.
Very simple again.
You cannot differentiate between right and wrong by
the standards of Allah.
You justify it.
You accept it.
You do it or I do it, we
do it with no remorse.
Pay attention to this word.
The remorse word is a million dollar word.
It moves your heart all the way.
You didn't wake up for Fajr, I was
tired.
End of the story.
Dead.
I didn't wake up for Fajr.
And I keep asking myself, when this will
end?
When will I change?
Your heart is okay.
Sick but not dead.
I didn't wake up for Fajr.
And it is the end of the world
for me.
And today, I am gonna do way more
good deeds than I did yesterday.
I'm gonna be begging Allah to forgive me.
I'm crying.
I'm feeling down.
My heart is setting.