Ebrahim Bham – The Harms And Solutions To Anger
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AI: Transcript ©
Alhamdulillah Allah
wa
t it was Salatu was Salam O Allah.
Allah he was, he was seldom at the Sleeman kathira
Welcome.
My dear respected elders and brothers, Allah subhanho wa Taala has created us with different human emotions.
Some emotions are natural,
like the feeling of hunger, the feeling of thirst, some of it is positive love, kindness, compassion, and some of it is negative, like hatred, anger, etc. So, these are different emotions with which Allah subhanho wa Taala has created us and amongst them, one of the most harmful and the most hurtful is depth of anger, which I would like to speak on today. And it is one of the most harmful and hurtful, especially in terms of his repercussion.
Perhaps I would be right in saying that one of the greatest reasons of the breaking of family relationships, whether it be between husband and wife, between brothers and sisters, between ants and nephews, it is because of anger. There is no doubt with regard to it. And
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under the aspect of an under the influence of anger, many times a person does not worry about the commands of Allah. He is not even worried sometimes about his own gain and his own benefit. He doesn't even worry with regard to the image that he presents to people when he's angry. Have you ever seen an angry man, if only an angry man can go and see himself in the mirror, perhaps he will desist from anger. But this is a reality. And it is so unfortunate that people do not realize the consequences of it. Today, we have different forms of anger. So you have air rage, people getting angry, right above the clouds, in the airplanes, they getting angry, sometimes we get road rage. And
people have died because of road rage. They get angry with regard to how other people are driving. So they say normally a person, when a person is driving, whoever is behind him is too fast. Right? So he's always looking at you. And the person in front of you is always snow. So you always want to get in front of him. So we're always in the state of frustration. And this road rage has become the means of people losing themselves or going to the point of violence. I would just like to give you a tip with regard to road rage. If ever you get angry with someone on the road, just remember one thing, you would probably never ever see that man after one minute.
So don't waste your anger on that man that perhaps will never ever see him in your life again. And in this particular in in anger, a person who is not in control of his impulses, liable to say things that he would otherwise not say. In the state of rage he becomes a danger to himself and to others. And sometimes amazingly even the nicest of people who are so good. When you see them from five years old, nice far from nice, you know, or they are nice from far. They are nice from fire when you see them, but when they get angry.
They are far from nice. This is the reality they are such good people when you meet them in normal circumstances. The moment anger overtakes them, they forget everything with regard to it. And in minutes, sometimes a person can lose relationships sometimes
person can lose friendship. Sometimes a person can lose his property or on the basis of anger. Totally there may, in some up Never had to save up to copper back in the day, who said he would just say, Jason nikka rich Daddy, or yakata
is slim, who said he had acne, acne wooper camera.
Therefore it is so important that we control our self with regard to the aspect of anger. And because anger is a natural thing, and is treated as anger and Love does not say that a person must not become angry. Allah never say don't become angry. Therefore in the Quran, Allah does not say do not become angry Allah Allah says, control your anger. And not Allah does not want elimination of anger. In fact, if a person doesn't have anger, there's a flaw in him. For Santa to eat, some kid knocks him No, because if you don't have anger, how are you going to be motivated to to benefit yourself to fight for truth to fight for justice? How are you going to benefit for your own sake for
your own interest? So there's not one that we must be without anger? Allah subhanho wa Taala wants the control of anger, the right reason the right time, the right extend. And this is what what it is. Anger must not be for personal reasons. It must be for the consideration of truth and justice. And unfortunately today It doesn't work like that. Today we only get angry for personal reasons Sahaba say maybe a cream sauce love never ever got angry for personal reasons. Never ever,
never ever got angry with regard to food. In fact, if you read the Hadith, Melissa Aslam, never ever praised food excessively. He never criticized food. Today we get angry with regard to our wife because there's a little bit more salt
against the sooner than never and this is the word of the Hadith that he never excessively praised food. He never criticized food. If he didn't like it, he stayed away from it. And what we only get angry because of personal reasons.
MLM is near husaberg Cabo panas Aurora Nakia was a jersey Corona. So he was also a mock up of Casa Wenatchee. And one of the best examples of this is the example of alira Viola and many times, you know, this, this aspect of getting the reason and getting angry for the sake of Dean, it is one of the exceptional type of anger that you get angry for the sake of the law doesn't mean that the moment you get angry, you must go ahead and you know, give vent to your anger. But to get angry when you see the commands of Allah subhanho wa Taala been violated is a sign of Eman. Sahaba say that Nivea cream sauce lamb when the laws of Allah were violated, you saw it on his face, and two things
was to happen. One is they used to be a veil between the two eyes that used to protrude who's to come up with a nice Aslam used to be angry. And another example the Sahaba said it was when the bees Aslam used to get angry, it was like as if a pomegranate was was, you know, sucked. And it was ripen. In that particular pomegranate used to be that sprinkle upon the cheeks of our beloved. And
we all know this beautiful example of a little yellow Tony was fighting with the person at the end at the time of jihad in a particular time when he was in the time of jihad, has anybody allowed that and who got the better of him, you know, over floored him. And he was about to kill him because it was a battle. When the person's back in the face of Allah the amount of ammo, the moment is spent.
And the person was, you know, amazed, what have you done? You hit me in your control. If I was in a similar situation, I would have finished you. What did you do? He said no. First I was fighting for you for the sake of Allah. Now after you respect me, I saw a change in my intention. And that intention was changed. And I thought that now I'm going to fight with you. I'm going to fight with you because it's in my direction. So, this is a reality with regard to it. However, even if even if there is some form of justification, with regard to getting angry at certain occasions, because of the propensity of it going beyond the limit, we should learn to control our anger even in apparently
justified reasons. And this is very important because who makes the decision that my anger is
justify today, even when you get angry and you give a talk to your wife, you got a justification for it. So, you can even if there is an apparent justify, we are not in that particular type of sincerity that we can say our engaged for justified reason. Therefore, for us we have to control our anger as embassy Rama coolala used to say, a believer is He who never allows his anger to get the better of him.
A believer is he would never allows his anger to get the benefit for the better of him. Tom was set up as a bottleneck in
a way
camera shy, he was a he bought tuna, even if it's for the right reason, we need to control him, our owner might have written when you are angry, you feel your physical strength increases. Now you feel you are very strong. You feel you are very strong. Therefore person has made mentioned over the husband one day came home and he told his wife, don't ever Don't make me more angry, I'm very angry, the animal instinct is gonna come out of me and what type of animal is gonna come out of me and the wife said, leave it. I'm not afraid of a mouse. Corner more small hammer, you think you've got more physical strength.
And, but your intellectual and your spirituality diminishes.
You think your physical strength is at its peak, but your spiritual and intellectual strength diminishes. Therefore the owner may have written
it is not permissible for an athlete to make a decision when he is angry.
And because it means anyone who's got authority, who start must not make a decision with regard to discipline of the children, men is angry. The husband must not make a decision with regard to his wife and his marriage at the state of anger. Brothers, I plead with you, I plead with you because I've seen so many examples. Never, ever make a decision with regard to the future of your marriage when you are angry.
I plead with you when you do that brothers, rather go and walk away. Don't make a decision with regard to family relationship when you are angry. And many times we give justification. I don't need any anger management. I shouldn't have got angry he or she made me angry. Is that a response? Is that a valid way? I didn't get angry. She made me angry or he made me angry. It is not. It's not a justified argument. Maybe Corinne savasana one day was working in a villager key in the resource room had a shoulder and he pulled the shoal of nebbia cream Sala while he was so hard, the Sahaba got angry. And when the shawl whenever he saw slim remove the shawl, there was a red wealth upon
upon the chest of our beloved to be a cream sauce
without any justification and he said Muhammad be just in how you distribute wealth. If nebby of Allah was not going to be just will never be just
the way he was convicted, angry. He knows all my Sahaba leave him, leave him, I will deal with him. And he was generous with how many people were there. Someone came to me.
Just listen to this by the respective brothers.
And he said, I would like to get married to your mother.
And he wasn't interested taunting him. And what
he said instead of getting angry, my mother is alive. I will go and ask her permission whether she wants to get married to you or not.
Why do we say she made me angry? He made me angry? Is that a justified reason for you to become angry?
One day a person came to me and said the other big one illegitimate person.
I don't want to use the English word with regard to cinnamon Sakakibara. What did he say? Did he get angry? He said the witnesses of my parents in the castella life
how do we say made me angry I got angry. This aspect is something whenever we feel we are getting angry and we feel anger is getting the better of us. We must remember that the person who angers you he controls you.
The person who enters you He's the one who controls you. Our imperfections must make us forgive the shortcomings of others. Therefore Allah subhana wa tada in the Holy Quran speaks about this aspect in which I reside that Allah says will cause he mean Allah
subhana wa COVID control your anger. You know what the meaning of Qasim the lmra you know, you get you get this leather bottles, the leather bottles in which you put your water now when
water gets filled. The atoms at a time used to put a string around it to control that the water must not go out. That is a medium of chasm. Sinatra says when your anchor comes out, bottle it up,
bottle it up under the
arrival casamino lies. And it's such a beautiful incident within about Zainal Abilene who said, I live in Hussein, one day he was sitting in the servant and the slave came and they dropped the whole, you know, the whole carry upon him the whole water, the whole food upon him. And he became angry many times people will become angry all the time the servants also they were people of you know, they knew the Holy Quran. So she said well cause Amina is restrain your anger immediately when you hurt her, if he is anger diminish, then she said well, now he will not become angry. Maybe you will get angry upon me after that. So she read the next higher portion of the ayah when our finance
minister can be forgiving to people, he said go I have forgiven you. And then when she saw the impact of the Quranic ayat upon him, she read Rama who
Allah loves those who are kind, he said go I have fried you.
This is how at me May I sell Sarah here are taka husa para Cabo Panini, hey, Bajaj whisper K, wasa Cousteau, Picabo, Colin, this is a very important point and they after it takes self awareness and self control to control your anger. So let us give certain very small shallow solutions we don't have much time for very few solutions with regard to what we should do to control our anger.
One day Nivea creme de la Halima Salaam saw a person who was elated with anger. And then we saw some said, I know a sentence, I know a formula, if he reads it, Allah subhanho wa Taala will cure him from the anger and then maybe a cream sauce from said, anger is from shaytan anger is a fire from shaytan. Whenever any one of you gets angry, let him read
him in the shade.
So whenever anyone gets angry, read our will below him in a shape on the second thing, right change your posture. What a beautiful example let me give you a hadith in a Buddha, that if you are angry when you are standing Sit down. And if you are sitting down go and lie down. Now what is this, it gives you critical breathing space and the diversion may help you regain composure. So if you are standing up, when you are standing up, the capacity to do harm is greater than when you are sitting. And when you are sitting, you still can do harm. But when you are lying down, the capacity is even less. And in today's time just walk away. Sometimes just walk away from an argument, walk away from
an argument it is better than the third thing, maybe a cream sauce alum said, you know, remain silent, remain silent when you are angry. And I always make mention of this, that a person is a master of what he has not said. But he's a slave of what he has said.
A person is a master you haven't said anything you still have the ability, whether I must say how I must say, but the moment you have said God, you have to live with the consequences for the rest of your life. You can go and say you know one day a person came to me and said I gave in anger I was very angry. Is it is it effective? Does the following
is effective? No one gives the lock in love and mercy someone give me the lucky love to give only he only gives the lock in anger. So it is effective. Why did you allow him a Muslim person he says a believer never allows anger to get the better of him. So this is good. And among the film make boo.
anger comes from shaytan shaytan was created from fire and fire is extinguished by water. So when you get angry, go and make you know go and make room. When you make boo you will actually feel that the water is extinguishing your anger. You will feel it that way. Go and try it out whenever you get angry with me. And then sometimes remember the aspect with regard to you know the rewards with regard to restraining your anger.
Allah in fact he may Allah Allahu Allahu Allah Subhana Allah Who ever restrains his anger when he has the ability to to express it. Allah will fill his heart with peace and Eman.
When you get angry and you restricted for the sake of Allah, Allah subhanho wa Taala will fill your heart with demand and peace. And remember my dear respect of others, the person whom you are many times getting angry upon you for
I've got power over him. I've got control over him. He is my student. He is the wife he is this I got control over him. Remember, Allah has more control over you than what you have over other people. Allah has more control over you than what you have over other people. So remember whenever you getting angry over someone, remember these few words may Allah subhanaw taala always keep up with good law always keep us with good conduct and character keep us away from you know those things that are negative and keep us away in a way that we must do things in anger, which you will regret later on, say inshallah. So analyze