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Friday Night Etiquettes Class – May 28, 2021

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Daood Butt

Channel: Daood Butt

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


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Bismillah al Rahman al Rahim al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil alameen wa salatu wa sallam Who? ob Hill Karim la Posada to Adama tasnim rubbish Ali Sabri Wei acidity, Emily lock letter melissani of Kahoot goalie my brothers and sisters a set of more at a commodity robot our cattle

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I hope that you enjoyed your Friday jamala I hope that you got hold of your bucket stones because they are here in Canada handed in law and it's a very short season so these sindri dates

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dates mangoes are and

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we'll get to john says in a couple of weeks maybe in about two weeks inshallah. So while we wait for a couple of people to come on and shut law, you know, today's Friday, there's still the last, what 4040 minutes or so of this Friday so make sure that you take advantage of sending Peace and blessings upon the profits as long as he was selling as much as you possibly can.

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And also, if you haven't decided sort of calf well, you know to be Friday's the day that we do it so if you want to ever say sort of Catherine skip on on today is class and just Washington, there might be something wise to do Allah knows best. But today we're going to continue with our class on the advocates of speech and we're going to look at a few different topics in sha Allah hotel.

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The first one we're going to look at is when

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someone speaks and then turns and walks away.

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How do we respect what they mentioned, someone comes to you for example, someone comes to you as happened as jab at me I'm dealing with your lover and Homer says that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam or the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said either had deferred module, Bill Hades, some multifit.

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For here, Amana

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the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, when a man or a person tells something to you, and then turns in departs, then that is a trust. What is what does this mean? Right? Someone basically comes to you and talks to you, and immediately turns away. What do you need to do? Should you respect that? If they didn't say anything about it, maybe they said, You know what?

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I want to share something with you, and they say something to you, and all of a sudden, they just turn in, they walk away, right? How do we respect that? What does that even mean? So it's not an ugly, look at that as a trust something that someone can find it in you with, right? They came to you, they should something important with you is something that was meaningful to them something that is important and absolutely, you know, an emotion of theirs. How do we know this? Well, the person came in, they shared it with you, and then they turned in the left, they may have left because, you know at a fear for themselves or something that was going on? Or you know, sometimes

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people come in, they need some help, for example.

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You know,

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it happens with me a lot where people will come to me start telling me something and then they'll just get up and say, No, no, I'm sorry, I can't and then they get up in the leaf. Right? Now, that's an Amana, whatever they shared with you is an amona as the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam mentioned as in it is in they have entrusted you with those words, they felt comfortable enough to tell you what was on their mind what they were feeling what was in their heart. And therefore my brothers and sisters, we need to respect how they felt or feel. And we need to respect what they told us. So if it was something that is private, something that is secret, something that's

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important, we keep it as a trust between us and that person. Now, of course, there are times when we may need to help someone, right? Someone might come to you and say,

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when they come and say something to you and then leave that doesn't mean that it's just a secret could mean that they trust you enough to do something with the words that they're sharing with you. For example, someone comes to you and says,

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being abused, can you help me?

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Or they don't even say can you help me? They might come to you and say, I'm being abused at home, and they turned in, they walk away would they come in

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See that to you? There's a reason why they can reason why they trusted you. And trusted to share that with you. What just happened?

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Monster. Okay, so I think I'm hoping the live stream is still working there inshallah, there we go,

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should be up and running.

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Okay. So there's a reason why they came in, they said this to you, I'm being

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abused at home, or, you know, so and so person has done this to me and they walk away, that means they've come to you seeking help trust you enough to be able to help them to assist them in what they're going through in their life. But my brothers and sisters, it's an Amana, it's not just a secret, it's an amount they've trusted you enough to come to you for you to be able to help them in a situation that they're going through. And we've probably seen so many videos online of you know, people that are in a very difficult situation and they come to someone and they just give them a piece of paper and they leave, you know, because someone there with might have a weapon or something

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of that sort. And then, you know, they the authorities and the authorities come and you know, take some sort of action against the oppressor or the person who's you know,

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abusing someone else. And so islamically we see that as an Amana a trust speech that we have to respect. Someone shares something with us very short, very brief, they say something and they walk away. That is

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important

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to acknowledge and to act accordingly. And we leave the rest up to Allah subhanho wa Taala.

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So we saw an example of

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what the prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam says, we move on to the demon a cabal fill color, so to allow those that are elder those that are senior, those that are more knowledgeable or even those that are older than us in age to speak first before we take that platform of speaking. And we look I do have a binaural model Viola and hula right? Even our model the alumni, he's with his father aroma evening, Bob are the alumni and they're in a gathering with the profits on a longer it he was on them and some of the other Sahaba of the Longhorn home.

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And he marrieds that Allah's Messenger some among it he was sending themselves he asks his companions right the prophets on the longer end he was seldom asks the Sahaba the Allahu Allah. He says, Son, Allahu Allahu wa sallam informed me of a tree which resembles a Muslim giving its fruits at every season, by the permission of its Lord and the leave which do not fall. Okay, so the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is asking the Sahaba, viola and Han, which tree represents symbols that have the right result that of the Muslim who gives its fruits or giving it has its roots at every season, as in is assisting people, regardless of the time always there, you know, it's it's, it is

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of some benefit to people. Therefore, the Muslim is of some benefit to others, regardless of the season, the time the day or the night.

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By the permission of its Lord and the leaves of which do not fall.

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So the Sahaba de la whom who are sitting with the Prophet, sallAllahu, alayhi wasallam, they don't respond. They stay quiet, they're silent. In the normal, the Allahumma. He looks around and he sees that this habit of the Aloha and whom are all staying quiet, he's young, he's a boy at the time.

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So

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he says, it'll be a long run. I thought of the date palm tree.

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But I refrain from speaking because abubaker and Arma where they're wrong, that is his father battle the Lucha right. But he says i refrained from speaking because abubaker and Arma were there.

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Even though he thought and felt that the answer to the question of the Prophet longer Allahu wa sallam was the date palm tree.

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When nobody spoke up the prophets on a longer I think he was sending him said it is the date palm tree.

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Then when the Sahaba dispersed, they left the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and it'd be no longer the Allah and he is walking away with his father on the evening football of the beloved

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He says, When I came out with my father, I, Father, it came to my mind that was the date palm tree. So he tells his father, he says, You know what? I actually thought or felt that the answer to the question of the Prophet sallallahu, Alayhi, wasallam was the date palm tree. So I'm gonna do Omar, and he says to his son, he says,

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What prevented you from saying it? Oh, my son, right? What prevented you from saying it? Had you said it, it would have been more dear to me, then such a such thing. And he mentioned something.

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And then they've been our model the alohar. And he responds to his father, he responds to his father, I'm gonna have no football of the alumni. And he says,

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I said nothing.

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So sorry, he says, nothing prevented me, except the fact that neither you, nor a Buddha spoke, so dislike to speak in your presence. Look at this long story to learn a very simple thing.

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That those who are older from amongst us have a right to speak first, before those who are younger, that does not mean that we never ever listen to or acknowledge the youth. And this is a problem that we face today. And I could probably sit here and talk about this for the next hour. But I'm not going to do that. Right. But just to touch up on the topic a little bit, as the older generation, and I feel like I'm getting older, even though I hope that I'm still young humbler, right. You know, as older in life, we feel as though the youngsters or the youth, the teenagers, the children from amongst us, you know, we disregard what they have to say, what they feel, what their desires are,

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and their opinions, and so on and so forth. But the reality is, we should listen to them a little bit more. Just because we are shown within a snub to allow those who are older than us to speak first doesn't mean those who are younger, should never speak. And they don't mean that

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wisdom is only with the elders and not with the youngsters. It also doesn't mean that the youth can't be a part of, or play a vital role in the development and the growth of our communities. In fact, we should empower our youth a lot more we see that he you know, countries, especially non Muslim countries around the world, they empower the youth so much they encourage, urge the youth to be a part of everything, right part of communities and centers and projects and feeding people and looking after the towns and the cities and cleanliness and being part of you know, volunteering in hospitals, and even coming to work with their parents and stuff like that, like there's so empowered

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youth and power empowerment

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that see happening around us. Yet within our Muslim communities, a lot of the time we fail to acknowledge the youth, and we fail to

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simply lend an ear to listen to what they have to say. And you know what disturbs when we listen to the younger generation. First of all,

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we are teaching them to listen to the nation. So when you give someone the time to speak, and that's actually the next, the next chapter heading or the next sub topic that we are covering.

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Alright, say the next topic that we're taking within this chapter is our demo called RTL. Hadeeth. Right, refraining from cutting off someone when they're speaking. So when we as those who are older, hear or see that someone's younger wants to speak, and we allow them to speak and we listen to them.

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What we are teaching them is that they should in return also allow those who are older than them to speak and to listen and pay attention and not cut them off. You see my brothers and sisters the way that we teach people and I know it's easier said than done, but the way that we interact with people in society, we have to very much understand the importance of what the prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said when

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he mentions a Muslim or a holy Muslim, right. And when he says on a longer it he was alum, let me know ahead welcome had your head bully, a he may your head bullying FC, one of you will not truly and fully believe until you love for your brother or your sister what you love for yourself. Right? Why? Because when someone has something on their mind or in their heart and they want to express themselves, right, if we cut them off, and we never listened to them, that we're not doing justice, and how do we expect them in return?

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Just to stop and listen to us and pay attention to us when we have something to say, they will treat us the same way we treated them. Right. And so my brothers and sisters, when we look at this, you know, part of of this chapter about allowing those who are older to speak first, yes, within Islam, we give respect and honor to those who are older than us. But at the same time, we as those who may be older than others, regardless of how old you are, there's always going to be someone who's younger than you. Regardless of how young you are, there's always going to be someone who's older than you, regardless of how young you are, there's always going to be someone who's younger than

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you. And regardless of how old you are, there's going to be someone who's older than you. So there's always going to be someone who's older and someone who's younger, regardless of whether you are older, you are young, okay?

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What that means is, we need to understand other people's feelings and other people's emotions, other people's thoughts. And when we allow people to express themselves, sometimes we defuse issues and incidents that could arise, right, we defuse it, how do we defuse it? Well, we defuse it by allowing them to express themselves in getting out, and then possibly responding to what they have to say, or simply acknowledging what they have to say. And then they feel satisfied. They feel as though their emotions, their thoughts, their feelings were heard.

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And it's important for people to feel heard, not hurt, heard, as in someone listened to them. Why?

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Because it gets gets the feelings out. But also you plant the seed. When people listen to you. They may not agree right now, they may not acknowledge what you have to say right now. But there may come a point in time in their life when they feel similar, or they realize and acknowledge what you said, long ago. And so my brothers and sisters, a way to teach the younger generation to listen to the elder. The elders are the older generation from amongst us, is for us, regardless of how old we are, to listen to those who are younger, because we teach them that if I listened to you, then you should listen to me as well. Right? And the next part, like I said, I will call her I tell her these don't

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cut people off when they're speaking. Right? When people are speaking give them your attention, Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam when someone was talking to him, he would give them his attention, right? He would, he would look at them or, you know, he would look in their direction.

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And you know, there's, there's this discussion within Islam, some of the Sahaba or the Allahu anhu. They say that they would never ever look at the Prophet sallallahu wasallam in his face, as in, they would never look directly in the eyes of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, they were so shy in front of him that they would look down, right, they would look down, they would not feel comfortable to look at him. Right? And so

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they would look in his direction, but they would not look at the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam but the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam will give his full attention to whoever he's talking to. Right? So if he was talking to you, he would look at you and he would listen to you and he would not be distracted by what's going on, despite people talking to him and trying to grab his attention. And see this in an example.

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On the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was sitting in imageless, right bainham and Nabhi your son, Allahu Allah, he was some image listen. And he's talking to his people. He's talking to the comb to his companions of the lava. Anima and

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Arabi a bedwin came right to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.

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And he says to the puts on Allahu Allah, you send them matassa. When is our right when is the day of judgment or that final our resurrection? When is it going to happen? The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam pauses

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and continues to speak.

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And then there's speculation, right? There's like, some of the Sahaba are like maybe he didn't hear him. Maybe he, you know, is not too pleased this question. Maybe he doesn't know some of us alum not too sure why the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam paused and then continued in what he was talking about and dis regarded the question of the bedwin men.

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And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says, Where is the person who asked about the hour

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and the bedwin man he you know, raises

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His voice he, you know, identifies himself. He says, I am him. He says, you know, what is your question? And he says metta says, when when is the our end? The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam responds by saying, When honesty is lost, then wait for the hour, when honesty is lost, then wait for our saboteur the Lucha and Omar like when honesty is lost and wait for the hour. What does that mean?

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So they asked the Prophet salallahu already who was sending them they say, how will that be lost? How will honesty like they can't even comprehend the fact that it would not exist amongst the people. Right? So they're like, how will that be? How will honesty be lost, yet I sort of lost someone longer and he was alone. So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam replies and says, when the power of already comes in the hands of people who are unfit, then wait for the hour,

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when the power of authority is given to people who are not fit to have those positions of authority, then wait for the hour as in, that means you are near the end of time.

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What do we learn in this example, my brothers and sisters,

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we actually are not talking about the Hadeeth itself. And what was said the lesson of the statement of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam. We are looking at the example of the action of the bedwin men who came during the majelis during that gathering of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam where is he where he's addressing the people beside Pablo de la Nome, and this man comes in interrupt,

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not

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liked within Islam, to interrupt people when they're speaking.

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And it is not from the teachings of the prophets of Allah Adam, and this is why when the bed when men came and interrupted the profits on longer, and he was telling me he paused.

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And then he continued to teach, right, or to address the Sahaba of the Allahu anhu. And that shows us that we should not interrupt someone when they're speaking, we listen. And when the time comes to ask questions that we ask questions.

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And so this bedwin, he had a very good question, which is important. The Sahaba didn't know the answer to it either anywhere, they themselves, were asking about a sort of low What do you mean, when honesty is lost? How is it possible that honesty would be lost? Right? And then on a longer alley, us and them answers that question. So it shows us the importance of

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being respectful to the one who's speaking. Also, when we interrupt someone who's speaking, it makes us look bad. When someone is saying something, we stand up and say, Oh, you're a liar, you don't know what you're talking about. It makes you look bad. All of a sudden, everyone who's listening to this person, that person who was speaking may not have been speaking the truth, but now it just makes you look bad. So as believers we always are cautious. We are always careful of how we conduct ourselves. Right? And this is why etiquettes are so important to learn. How do we sit? How do we stand? How do we speak? How do we talk? How do we listen? Right? How do we look? And where do we

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look alright, and what do we listen to and how do we you know the things that we say and so on and so forth. So hamdulillah we can learn a lot from the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam

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let's take a couple more things in shot a lot of time. Let's look at one more thing. Okay.

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Underneath and Callum were adamant, thi

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it is from the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam to not speak too fast, right to speak in a manner where people can listen they can hear, they can comprehend. And the way the prophet SAW the longer it he was sending would speak. He would allow them to not only listen and comprehend, but to also memorize to memorize what was being said. Right. So shout out the love I know. She tells us in this hadith on morning what meaning of the among Lana.

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She says, Allah's Messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam would not speak on an on like the way that you do.

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Read

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He would pause periodically, so that those who sat with him would remember what he said. We get that. She says, it'll be a long run her that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, when he would speak, he would speak in a manner that people are able to listen to comprehend, and he would pause, giving them the ability to sort of instill within them what he was saying, to remember to memorize what he had said, and we know that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam as we learnt already, he had Joe Amir Al kelim, the ability to say small sentences, small phrases that had very powerful heavy meanings, right? So he would say something small, a Dean naseeha What does that mean? Right?

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In normal Binney yet we're in a liquid lemare in Manoa.

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Now you may know haidakhan

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law you know, I had a competitor, you're a bully AHIMA, you're a bully in FC

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men can you walk me through biller he will Yomi folio Kula hire, Ollie a smart

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write

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simple phrases, simple things, right? Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam would say, and this habit of the law and home would memorize, and they would understand and they would think and they would reflect? Now it shows a number of things. First of all, it shows wisdom.

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Okay, there's a difference between speaking slowly because you know what you're saying and you want it to be understood by the people. And,

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and speaking slowly because you have no idea what you're saying. And sometimes when you listen to and sadly, you know, this is something that you'll see official announcements, right? Sometimes official announcements, they speak so slowly First of all, because the teleprompter is going too slow. Second of all, because they have no idea what they're saying and they're just trying to make sure that it all makes sense.

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And making sure that they don't contradict themselves into something else that they said right so it's important for you know, people when they speak to speak that which is true and right and this is why Allah Subhana Allah says in the Quran

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Yeah, you yeah your nurse it Tacoma wa kulu Colin sadita

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right. To see that which is true. Say that which is true and what is right and a loss of Han with Allah says yet and you are living in Lima taco Luna man at a value

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all of you who believe why is it that you say that which you do not do? Right? So it's important for us to think before we speak.

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And remember, men can uh, you know, be law, he will know me awkward folio, cool. Hi, Ron, only a smart, whoever believes in Alon the last day. Right?

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See that which is good or mean silent.

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remain silent. You don't need to always saying stuff you don't need to always be talking. And when we say to refrain from saying things, what we mean as well is refrain from typing things or refrain from posting things online. We don't need to comment to every single post that we come across.

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And for some reason, social media, many of us where we will see something online and we feel like we all need to say something about it. Something's going on in the world. And we all need to see it. Someone posts about food and we all need to say something about it or a restaurant and we all need to comment about it or other and we all need to comment about it or, you know, the whatever it is anything that's happening, anything that's posted that we see, we all feel that we need to say something about it. And then people say oh, but why not being us? We have freedom of speech. Yes, we have freedom of speech, but you always need to speak. We don't always need to speak. You know,

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sometimes people messaged me, and they say, Why haven't you comment about this? Why haven't you said that? Everyone is talking about this? Why haven't you said anything? Because I don't need to all of you spoken already. Why do I need to say anything, right? So many people are saying the same thing? Why do I need to say it again. And at the same time, I may not agree with you. You might agree to something I may not agree with you.

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And if I choose not to say it or voice that opinion, publicly Alhamdulillah as believers we keep our belief and our amen between us and Allah subhanho wa Taala had that. Right. And so it's important to learn how to speak when to speak what to say how to

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To say it, who to say it to, and so on and so forth. And this is why we are learning what we're learning. So remember, I had a shout out the Allahu anhu. She says, Allah's Messenger would not speak on sorry, Allah's Messenger would not speak,

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on and on, like that you do. ratha would pause periodically, so that those who sat with him would remember what he said. And you know what my brothers and sisters, many of you have been asking, why don't we do daily halakhot daily classes, the profits on the longer How do you sum them actually discouraged from doing too many classes from teaching too much, because you first of all, don't value the knowledge after some time. And second of all, we cannot as human beings grasp and retain all of it all the time, there has to be change, and there has to be a break. And there has to be a pause. And there has to be, you know, a time to refresh oneself. And it should not always be

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constant delivery of messages and information and so on know, what we learned last week, we should have time to implement, we should have time to research we should have time to do to try and comprehend, we should have time to try and understand what it means. And try to figure out how we are going to better ourselves and so on and so forth. And that's the way of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and the Sahaba of the Allah and one of the companions of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. So before we speak, we think and we reflect, and then when we do speak, we speak words of wisdom. That's all that we're going to take for today inshallah, to open it up for some

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questions. If anyone has any questions, feel free to type those in, in the comment section. And if not, then we will, in a few minutes, you know, get ready for sold out to the market it those of you who have not completed your reservation of soda through Caf for the day, then please remember to do so. And those of you who wants to head out and make dua out because it is the last few minutes of Friday before the sunset. And this is a time when do when prayers when supplication is accepted, use this time wisely, wisely, to pray and to ask Allah to Allah for forgiveness, for peace, for safety, for tranquility, for strength of Eman for you know his of the end and for nearness to Allah and love

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him in our hearts and, you know, strength in the ability to implement the Sunnah and teachings of Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and you know the things that we need to be better people in our society and to support goodness and to stand strong when we see that there are in justices and evils that are happening. And so use that time and remember to make do pray and supplicate for all of us as well. Don't forget your Muslim brothers and sisters and the rest of the world and the oma in your do in your prayers.

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So if we don't have any questions, we'll stick around for another minute or so see if there's any questions that do come in. If not, then we will end the session inshallah.

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If I sit really still and only move my eyes It may be a little freaky.

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Sometimes people come on and they're like, is it frozen?

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Okay, I think I saw there was a question about fasting let me just scroll up are you allowed to fast every day so it is not from the Sunnah of the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasallam it's not from the teachings of Islam to fast everyday the most a person who is willing to fast should fast for is to fast one day skip a day fast a day, skip a day, fast a day skip a day, but it is not encouraged to fast every single day. Because it takes away from the strength of the body it takes away from the immune system, and it takes away from your ability and strength to fulfill some of the physical aspects of life that are needed.

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If any man breaks their rule while leading a prayer in congregation what should the mmm do, the Imam should leave and go and make all the and they have the choice of either pausing the congregation, just announcing to them that I'll be back and just leaves mixed blue and comes back and continues the prayer where he left off or

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to ask someone behind them

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to lead the prayer. So to signal or to pull someone up to lead that prayer. Okay.

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So that's all that we'll take for today. Just luck on the level Hayden barakallahu li comes of Hana kolodner will be handig National Illa Illa Illa. antenna still federal cabinet to blue lake.

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What's up Mr. Lee Kumara