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Talk Given To Women (Questions & Answers)

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Bilal Philips

Channel: Bilal Philips

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


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Somebody started a question that one cut off. And they consider

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No, but it's not supposed to be that he cuts her off, he's supposed to hear what she has to say. I mean, because he's the head of the household doesn't mean that nobody says anything in the house except for himself. That's not what the house will mean.

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I mean, head of the household means that decisions are made by consultation, people hear what people's opinions are, etc, but the final decision rests in the hands of the man but he should still hear people out here what their opinions are, and shouldn't cut people off stop them from being able to express their their opinions. See, I think some of this also stems back to you know, how we chose our husbands in the first place is he This is where a lot of these problems arise. That you know, if people in the process of choosing you know are not

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able to choose according to the proper criteria, where they're choosing people who will respect people's opinions, etc, etc, then this is what leads to these kind of situations where sisters find themselves in circumstances where they're trapped.

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So, the key is the process of marriage especially for convert Muslims is one which

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needs to be

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dealt with very carefully. Because you know, though normally speaking in a Muslim society, where marriages are arranged, and man may meet his prospective bride and talk briefly and that's enough in this kind of circumstance where people are coming out of non Muslim backgrounds and there's no family to really investigate the person thoroughly and to know about their background etc. It does require that people communicate much more you know, before marriage before getting into a marriage situation in my view,

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okay, let me just mention here that the brother mentioned that there is going to be somebody coming to do

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session Right, well, when when is this

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at 345 during the break between the

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for the break is from 330.

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To confirm Exactly.

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Okay, just confirm that one second, okay. Because I think there's somebody coming with will handle to give a fix session for you all. So,

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you know, we have another about 10 minutes and maybe the major fit questions can be you know, save the people want more details etc, that can be saved for when this person comes.

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Okay, somebody else wants to ask another

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another sister started a question.

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A bid die which is not related to the religion is not considered to be Balala. For sure. Because

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putting a rug in a Masjid is without,

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you know, putting air conditioning in Masjid is without all of this building, you know, minaret is all of these things are bigger, you know, in that sense, because these are changes that have been made to the structure of the masjid, which did not exist in the time of problems or Salah. But the point is that these are these has nothing to do with religious practice.

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This is per se, this is technological advancements and building developments in architecture, etc. So this area is not the area of, you know, putting toilets, for example, bathrooms in houses. This is

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in the time of farmers asylum, they all went out, you know, in the desert, you know, they went out in the bush, you know, so Okay, so we don't know, of course, and even when they first started building toilet seats to build them outside just as it was here in America also outhouses, right? Then later on these things were included inside the home. Now this is all bizarre, but we don't classify this now as as being Salalah. No, no. So it is really things that that have religious impact that impact on the religion they are taken as being a part of the religion. This is where Buddha comes now as being Delilah, because it's based on the fact of what that religion was

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complete. This is arguments what are the arguments for bid are being Delilah and leading to help? It's not just a hadith which we were promised and said couldn't live without him Allah Allah

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Allah but how do we interpret it? We interpret that along with the other Hadees which SLM had said whoever innovates some something in this appear of ours in the Dean's men asked us if we emelina malice I mean, who whoever innovate something in the religion.

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And also under the arguments to use a code the ayah Allah yamaka masala convener come today I've completed for you, the religion. So these are all of these arguments indicate, you know, that this issue of without is with regard to the innovations in the religion?

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And this is why you could hear Omar

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read the Allahu anhu use the term beta hustler, because it is authentic that he said that, but it's not in regards to the religion, per se.

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No, no, no, it shouldn't be those things in our she spilled the coffee, you know, drops the glass or no hitting for these kind of reasons. No, it's not acceptable. A, I mean, it is like the case, she refuses to make Salah, she wants to go outside, you know, and she doesn't want to wear proper hijab, you know, she's wearing for a few months, she's gonna mean things which are, you know, not acceptable islamically and he's advising or trying to advise her and he's separated into bed, and you know, these things, and it's still not bringing her into line, as a final step, you know, he hits her in places which are permissible in on with the force, you know, which is a minimum force as

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opposed to maximum force, and, you know, which should not involve breaking the skin, creating bruises, etc. You know, this is the circumstance under which, you know, because even for example, even children, you know, as the number of scholars hold, it's not permissible to hit the child for anything beyond the deen based on the fact that said, you know, teach your children for law, when they're seven, and hit them for it, when they're 10.

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Added to go hit them for other things. Actually, I'ma say this, I'm just giving an example right, that some of the scholars hold that is not permissible to hit the children for anything other than the things related to the gene.

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That's the position. And the thing, you know, where the point is that in any case that you know, with regards to the hitting this as mentioned in the Quran, I mean, this is for a disobedient wife. This will be the wife mean that she, disobeying her husband, you know, consistently either consistently she's just refusing to cooperate in the home at all. She doesn't want to cook the food, you know, she's sleeping all day. And you know, things where there are things that need to take place in the home, which is part of, of the rights of the man that she's not fulfilling and he is advisor and told her, etcetera, etcetera. You know, it's these kind of circumstances where, you

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know, as a last resort, the man is allowed to do that.

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Well, let me ask you this sister, if your son sees you not praying, would you accept him hitting you?

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know, the thing if if, if you are slow in making your prayer, are you delaying? Would you accept the meeting? You know, because he you are in authority over him. Right? So it doesn't come the other way, right? Similarly with the husband, who's the head of the family, he's in authority over you. So you know, your correction is slightly different, it follows a different methodology than his.

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But for sure, if a husband is disobeying a law, in in the in the home, you have the right to show your displeasure, because what he's doing is displeasing to Allah, you should let him know that this is displeasing to you because it's displeasing to Allah.

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And you may do that, you know, by speaking to him, advising him. And you know, if this doesn't work, you may be, you may actually separate from him in the bed.

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Show your displeasure. I mean, it is not, you know, your displeasure because the father is displeasing to Allah. And if he insists, then you have the right to call in somebody from the outside to intervene, to bring him in line.

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Because you have the right, you know, in marriage, that your home be a an Islamic environment.

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I have during the Arctic after the wife received the blessing that her husband is seized by going to the masjid the last 10 nights of Ramadan? Or should a woman seek

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to further herself at home?

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Well, you know, let's do

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the praying of taraweeh men can be done in the masjid or in the home. So the issues of whether she should do it at home or not, she should seek other anyhow, you know, it's for everybody in Ramallah and to do so, in terms of the blessings that she, she gets, and he gets

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if she has helped her husband, I mean, she gets the reward for helping her husband. I don't know if she's gonna get the same blessing as he will, by spending the, you know, the 10 nights in Africa. I don't know if I could say that. That's the case. I mean, Alessia Lam said so we really don't have the authority to say so. But we know if he helps her. Or she helps him that she will be rewarded for helping him to

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do this particular

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religious

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duty.

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The wife received more blessings from going to meetings with women that current study, or does a woman receive just as many blessings from staying at home and studying with her husband or studying alone.

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In terms of more blessings or less blessings,

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it just depends more on the intention of the person. And the efforts that she makes towards gaining the knowledge.

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Well, if he has heater in our face, you know, this is a major error.

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This is grounds that she could seek divorce. You know, so if he has made this step and she wants to get out of the home for a while, go to back to her parents, then

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she has the right to do so to see, you know, comfort or refuge with their family. Or, you know, so, I mean, he in that case, would would be obliged to be patient for her to come back when she's ready. And when he's prepared to commit himself not to, to do such an act again.

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They must talk to him, but it's not just your daughter,

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you need to talk to this person, you and your husband needs to sit down with this person and talk to him, you know, check, check that person out, you know, you need to talk to other sisters in the community who may be relatives of his or whatever, you know, you need to check out the person's background. So,

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you know, Islam does not restrict you from checking out that person talking to the person or software, even the girl, you know, who has to be married, talking. But of course, in the case of a young girl who was, you know, not been married before, you know, her situation is a bit different, she has to depend on others more than she will for itself, because not being experienced, you know, she doesn't have the tools to judge me. And I was really saying this with regards to people who accept Islam in the society, they're already grown people, you know, in their 20s, or 30s, or whatever, they've grown people who've been out there to, you know, to this, so they have a sense of,

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of,

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of awareness, you know, of, of men and, and

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their personalities and their attitudes and things like this. So, she is capable of discussing with that person and finding out a lot for yourself. So in that case, you should do so, you know, but as well, she should still depend on, you know, others the person who was overkill, or while he or, you know, who will

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do further checks on the person, you know, before, you know, entering into marriage?

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Well, it's permissible, but you see, they're asking for trouble, you know, as the province I send them and said to choose, the person was pious, I mean, and then you

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are blessed. You're in a situation in sha Allah, where, you know, your marriage will be a blessed marriage, you know, in times of difficulty as well as in times of ease. But when you marry somebody who is not pious, meaning that they're not God fearing, in accordance with the proper understanding of Quran and Sunnah, or seeking that proper understanding, you know, then one opens oneself for trouble because the union does not have the blessing,

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you know, of a law on it. It's not Haram, but it doesn't have the blessing.

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But it doesn't nullify it doesn't like this, you know, the fact that, you know, you might have been with a group that wasn't,

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you know,

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selfie so to speak, where I mean is a Islamic group, but they have some errors. This doesn't mean that the bad what you did purely for the sake of Allah, which was done in a way which is not

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forbidden or distorted, deviant, you know, those are the two that you have done in that sentence is okay, it's acceptable.

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I mean, let us not think that the only time that our about is acceptable is if we are following quote unquote sellers, the way

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I mean meaning to say that those people who are belonging to the Hawaiian muslimeen for example, the ISNA people MSA people that they're not accepted because they're not you know clearly on the Salafi path This is very distorted and narrow you know, kind of understanding of what it means to follow the way of the seller

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yeah when our belief is correct meaning that you know, we're not believing in another god besides the law This is what it means you know, it doesn't mean that you know, because you might have thought allow us everywhere then all of your other the body's all down the drain No, no, no, I mean, you may have some mistakes and certain fine points of Akita you know, which have to do you know, with some a smile was too far You know, because you thought a lot of hand meant is power. This doesn't mean you're a bad as is dashed. No, no, this is just an error in interpretation or an understanding in a particular area that doesn't destroy the value of your worship

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depends on what type of bid as your bid is praying to saints

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You know, this is your bid if you're praying to others besides the Lord along with a law then whatever a bother was built on the basis of that is not valid.

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But you know if your eyes

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Yeah, prayer beads Yeah, for example. Yeah, you know, the prayer beads or or some other you know, the minor bit at least doesn't affect the quality of your worship.

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You know, for example, you are praying according to how the Anopheles thought that the women should pray and separate a lot from the men you know, so you did these prayers that doesn't mean all these prayers are invalid No, no no.

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No, if you have made proper will do i mean if say if you belong to for example, like the is that this group in in America it's still around they call the universal Arabic

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there was a there was one group which appeared in in the new york new jersey area, one of the early Islamic groups appeared like 30s 40s they're called

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something like the universal Arabic Association some kind of

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thing but anyway this is the gene they have the is a gene village journal some of you know about this. They have a name for their group but they're what they were teaching for Voodoo wasn't what do you know they had some practices which wasn't complete and proper will do so where people are doing something like that and Okay, we can say yeah, the Bible is incomplete It was not acceptable because Allah said that you know, there's no prayer acceptable was you know, without will do so what they were doing was up will do then and even though they called it will do it does their fair is invalid.

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Well, they call it Voodoo, but it's so now

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let's understand, okay, make a distinction. Okay, the mouth and the nose during the mouth and the nose in Whoo.

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This, of course, is different opinion as to whether this is a requirement. Right? The majority opinion of the scholars is that it is a part of Whoo, but doing three times, or doing two times or doing one time everything is all from the sun. Now.

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It's not a requirement that when you wash your hands, it has to be three times you know, your feet three times. Oh, it's one time is sufficient. You can go through doing everything one time. That is from the sun Nebraska Salaam did once did twice.

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with the permission of your husband.

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You know, I mean, as a wife, to stay out of your husband's home without his permission is not

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permissible, but with His permission.

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is permissible

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see where I program you know where music may pop in on a program.

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And I mean your intention, you're not sitting there to listen to that. It's just like you go into a department store to buy goods, then they've got this

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is got this pipe, they've got this pipe music in there does it mean you cannot go to this department store because this type of music? No, no. So what's the mechanism to follow?

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Any any way the brother of man is coming now? So inshallah we'll start the session. Now, the other questions that come to me here, perhaps you can look at them in the in the dollar session.

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So subcritical over Hambrick and a shadow.

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Sugar wanted to tuba.

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Okay, the sister

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Matina Yaki has daughter, I can talk to her about this after.

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Okay,

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because I've been trying to get ahold of your parents anyway. I've been calling them I haven't got any response. So I'd like to find out how I can get ahold of them.

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And those sisters are all the sisters in the conference I mean English because all the brothers the origin speaking the English speaking and the average speaking brothers, all

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we talked about this, and I'm sure even there's some other brothers

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who speak different languages, we'll have to include them. So please include that you can get our single

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amino salatu salam ala nabina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa

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salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah.

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Sister sisters, the question yesterday about is it allowed for a man to marry

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the daughter of his previous wife? Was that the question I think, before yesterday, now I have the details for you here.

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In Islam, if the

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if a man, most young lady is haram in Islam, it's low food and Islam to marry her mother, whether he approaches that lady or whether or not regardless, approaching her or not, it is haram that he married her mother

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during the future,

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if the man texts the mother,

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if he knows the mother, then it is haram. That he takes her young daughter if he approached her, if he has not approach it, then it is lawful in Islam. He can marry that young lady in the future. Is that clear?

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Sexual approach.

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Is that clear?

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If you say what I say. Could you say that again?

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Uh huh.

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Yes.

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Yes, yes.

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If Carry on,

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carry on

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if he has not sexual approaches demanded.

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You understand? What about the young lady?

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If he

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if he might have the young lady

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he can't in the future at all, whether he approach sexual approach or not as he can. So that's very clear, I think. humbler?

00:31:08--> 00:31:22

Yes, yes. Yes, definitely. As the Quran says Wollaston careful man kochava akumina Lisa, it is haram and lo unlawful in Islam, that this young in the future,

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they cannot marry the wife of their father, even if they are from another mother or a they are from another.

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They are not from that particular lady, that particular wife. So, yes, they, she, you know, they she, there is no problem. They they are they will treat her as their mother, you see.

00:31:50--> 00:31:50

Yes.

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I'm not to say that

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please.

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Step follow step by step notice. Husband? Yes.

00:32:51--> 00:32:51

No, he's not.

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Although, if the question is not clear for me again,

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if you will write it it will be better for me so that I will concentrate inshallah

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the sister here is asking about is a divorce is a divorce valid. When it is Talas, they are out of anger.

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First of all, you have to differentiate between tell us victory, and philos came out of anger. You see, nobody's laughing when he's making. Everyone is angry when he's making tell us. So I was angry. It's not an excuse at all. But visually, is with the love that you divorce your wife where she is, during the period of time, that is haram in Islam, you divorce a few times at once. That is also a bit that is not allowed also in Islam.

00:33:50--> 00:34:01

Now, it's not the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu sallam, it is really Haram, that someone do that. And also, it is also data that someone will make

00:34:02--> 00:34:09

to his wife, after sexually approaching half, he is not in the period after the period

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after sexually approaching it, if you make a law, that is also better. So these are three things which Muslims shouldn't have this grace.

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period of time, Muslim is not allowed to make a law. So the Sunni Allah, tala of Sunnah is that you divorce your wife, only one, one power away, she is clean when she's not in her period of time. And also,

00:34:46--> 00:34:46

after

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you know, lies he has approaches sexual approach and so this is a Sunnah, but if someone

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The sooner

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The scholar the stellar say if you divorce is three times as strong as it will be regarded as one. But the four schools of thought all of them say that if he divorces three times at one time, that means he or she is divorcing.

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That means they were regarded serious. They would regard that this. This is the view of the four schools of thought. But the sooner it's not that, so if there is

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serious, it should be regarded as well, only.

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I think you understand me?

00:35:49--> 00:35:49

Yes.

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The view of the solar will be accepted only there are no two views here. We don't want hanafy. We don't want Shafi we don't want Maliki we want sooner. The sooner is that if you divorce are three times it should be regarded as one. If your divorce are three times at 1111 time or two you know as well stay, then it should be regarded one one follows.

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Sister what I'm saying to you is what it means is Allah, I'm not a scholar, I'm not the island. But this is what I know in the sooner in the sooner in the days of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam there will never was three poker at a time. In the days of alberca there was no free time, in the two years of oma the first two years of Allah. There was no teeth out at one time at one time, after that aroma sort of yellow Allahu

00:37:28--> 00:38:14

Allah. So people who you know, they were giving power for nothing, there is no salt in the food today, I devoted you three time like that. So then I must say, if you say that, yes, it will be regarded as a threat. And you cannot come back to your wife until and unless you text her husband and he willingly divorces us. And so that he was saying that people were taking easy to these things. They were making a joke or they were so we as Mr. Libin Tamia say we are going to revive the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam we are going to revive the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu Sallam in reviving the son of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam we should stick to that. We

00:38:14--> 00:38:41

will say to if a Muslim divorces his wife three times at one one state one five, we will regard that we will teach him we will tell him that this is good. Don't do that again. But we will regard that as one palapa. See, and I say to you, this is not a view of mine. This is what is in the soul of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam that the woman someone should divorce his wife, one photo only?

00:38:49--> 00:38:51

No, it was never in the time of the Prophet.

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First of all, the Quran mission is this. The Quran in Surah Al Baqarah, Allah subhanho wa Taala okpala mahtani santarcangelo roofing out of Rwanda son

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divorce, divorcing, divorcing is to be done twice. This is in the Quran in the cow. And then in the second verse the Quran says for him for luck aha salata. Hello, if he divorces the says, chick shouldn't

00:40:00--> 00:40:28

She could not she should not she could not come back to him until she takes another husband. This is first of all in the Quran. Secondly, the political son of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam was the Sahaba used to make divorce are this alive this day, it is to do one only. And that was and then there is the author of even above the scholars see they say that this was this is data. You see, they say that divorce in three times is better.

00:40:29--> 00:40:43

And we cannot say that it is the US they asked me is where there is no mandate where there is no not from the Quran and from the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu sallam, when we mean sooner we mean the practical soon of the Prophet sallallahu Sallam

00:40:46--> 00:40:47

sorry.

00:40:54--> 00:40:54

Uh huh

00:40:59--> 00:40:59

ha ha.

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How would it affect you, if we gave you the sooner the better is by law. And if it's not, to be sooner, according if you not be accepted, we don't mean the sooner

00:41:21--> 00:41:58

we were against what we mean sooner the word of the Prophet sallallahu himself, the way of Islam. If this is contrary to the way of Islam, then how we can say that it will affect our life For example, we in the UK, she also has a lot of other hobbies. We have Islamic Sharia Council, all of them inshallah, they are following Quran and Sunnah strictly, we adopted that. And not only us, all developers nearly all over the world today, they are adopting that man has that methodology method, which is that we will not allow our

00:41:59--> 00:42:43

brothers to do theta at one time, we will teach them we'll tell them that. But if in case it comes to their life, without knowledge through ignorance, then we cannot say to their wife, yes, you are you are gone, you are gone. You see optimize another man and this and this, because it is not the son nothing. And the brother was raised that through ignorance. You see, it is something someone who is doing this willingly and knowledgeable and doing that. Sometimes disclosures can be a you know, can make that an assumption. Okay, like Abdullayev law, when a man came to me and say to him that he divorces his wife 100 times and that

00:42:44--> 00:42:53

authentic narration to blah, blah. And let's say that he devoted his time with his wife. Even our boss said yes, if

00:42:54--> 00:43:29

you divorce your wife, she cannot come back to you. Until she takes her husband. And also you disobeyed you are wrong. You are now you lost your your family, or you lost the obedience of Allah subhanho wa Taala he was making making that so that people will not make a joke. There's no 100 divorces in Islam. But we are saying sister if we want to revive the Sunnah of the Prophet salallahu alaihe salam we will not make it to affect our lives inshallah, that

00:43:35--> 00:43:36

you're asking me? Yes, I know that.

00:43:38--> 00:43:39

Most of them Yes.

00:43:47--> 00:43:47

Yes.

00:43:57--> 00:43:58

A lot

00:44:00--> 00:44:01

of women that

00:44:07--> 00:44:07

time.

00:44:20--> 00:44:26

If you have questions you'd like to just ask them directly in the Ask them if you prefer to write them

00:44:30--> 00:44:33

as questions of course, you know, in any area and you

00:44:35--> 00:44:42

know, some have expressed you know, the opinion that woman shouldn't go to tuition, especially here with their

00:44:45--> 00:44:46

student body.

00:44:48--> 00:44:51

There are many scholars who hold that it is permissible

00:44:52--> 00:44:59

because, ultimately, what is actually forbidden islamically is for men and women to

00:45:00--> 00:45:00

be alone.

00:45:03--> 00:45:12

This is fundamentally what is forbidden. So even in a circumstance on the classroom where a woman comes in, sitting and

00:45:14--> 00:45:18

studying, learning, whatever, and she's not alone with men,

00:45:19--> 00:45:29

technically speaking, this is not considered to be haram situation, it may be disliked, you know, from an Islamic perspective in the sense that the normal

00:45:30--> 00:46:07

arrangement should be that when men and women are in a single gathering, the men should be in the front, and the woman in the back. But of course, going to school, you can't ask, you know, professors to rearrange the class so that, you know, you all consider the back. And then of course, it's just not practical in a sense. So, I mean, what we're talking about here, because this is not a situation of fall off, you know, we're, of course, the women must be in the back, in a circumstance here, where it's a public gathering, for a woman to be there, you know, getting knowledge for the sake of

00:46:09--> 00:46:11

benefiting the Muslim community.

00:46:12--> 00:46:18

A number of scholars and I know, I agree with their opinion, that it is permissible,

00:46:20--> 00:46:21

not only

00:46:22--> 00:46:31

permissible, but in circumstances like here, I mean, it is a requirement on the community that, you know, some

00:46:32--> 00:46:43

will take up that responsibility of getting those areas of knowledge, especially which are critical for Muslim community with regards to women's needs.

00:47:08--> 00:47:23

I think this is a this is a circumstance which would be permissible from the point of view of the need, here in America, because while we have a general principle, that a woman should not travel without a man,

00:47:25--> 00:47:48

when a if a woman, you know, accepts Islam, and the rest of her family are non Muslim, the males in our family who are non Muslims are not considered to be Muslim. So it would mean then, you know, basically, she shouldn't leave her home. And this is something very impractical in this society, where people you have, you know, a natural generation of people who have become Muslim. And,

00:47:49--> 00:48:05

you know, a group of people become Muslim, and who don't have the family structure around them to provide the Muharram. So, in such a case, where these, of course, the Medical College, which is, you know,

00:48:06--> 00:48:08

nearest to the area, where you are,

00:48:10--> 00:48:19

where the rest of your family is, even if they're non Muslim is still better than one where you are more on your own.

00:48:29--> 00:48:30

Another direct question.

00:48:53--> 00:48:54

There wasn't any Gritten presence.

00:48:58--> 00:48:59

Well,

00:49:02--> 00:49:08

I wouldn't call it be the I in the sense that this is not something religious, right, it is not a religious

00:49:10--> 00:49:21

ritual, where we have something which is being added now as a religious ritual, this is where the issue of bid comes in. People, if the community feels for example, that the

00:49:22--> 00:49:38

in order to avoid this is what comes down to the principle of what they call set desire, or you know, avoiding the channels which may lead to some harm, you know, as they point out, you know, if in the time of the process I love, the

00:49:41--> 00:49:53

people the society with a healthy and and very conservative islamically speaking society, where today, people are coming out of all kinds of

00:49:54--> 00:49:59

backgrounds influenced by the media etc. Where sensuality is much higher in the society.

00:50:00--> 00:50:06

See that, you know, this helps to, to, to cut down on, you know, possible

00:50:07--> 00:50:23

bad influences that can come from circumstances like this. This is just, you know, you could say he had on the part of any given community, but if any community decides that they don't want to go with it, you know, they would prefer to leave it the way it was.

00:50:25--> 00:50:35

You know, it's perfectly okay to I mean, people should respect people's rights to, to have it that way. And as the same way people should respect the right of people to have it this way.

00:50:37--> 00:50:42

Because I say it's not an issue of religion, in the sense of being a religious act

00:50:43--> 00:50:49

with us, but it's just, you know, a position taken to avoid

00:50:51--> 00:50:55

unnecessary contact or to minimize

00:50:56--> 00:51:36

negative overtones of positivity that could come from such gatherings. For example, even the school system where the, you know, for example, Saudi Arabia, where you have separate schools altogether for girls and separate schools altogether for boys. I mean, this is a choice. This is not something which, you know, the Samak legal system says must be, if you had a class, for example, where the boys are sitting in the front, and the girls are sitting in the back of division, like the division of salon, I mean, that could very well be possible. Or if you want to add a curtain to it could also be possible. It's not an absolute requirement that the schools have to be socially separated. And

00:51:36--> 00:51:52

especially in North America, where for example, you know, the resources are very limited in terms of community to try to develop one complete and separate School for Girls and another complete and separate one for boys. It may not to be economically feasible, and another person was the same situation.

00:52:17--> 00:52:18

Well,

00:52:20--> 00:52:27

for myself, I mean, I don't know, I don't know of any, you know, particular a networking situation for

00:52:32--> 00:52:45

thinking that you're referring to educational time. Okay. That's one of the reasons why I was I mentioned in the last lecture, and I'm working with some other brothers and sisters who are in the field of education to try to set up

00:52:46--> 00:53:04

correspondence that situation which would be that type of networking situation where we could provide some knowledge for people to study on a systematic basis and also for people in the prisons and you know, other circumstances where they're not able to get out and get the knowledge

00:53:09--> 00:53:16

Well, I just know that it exists. You know, and I've seen some rulings that they've made you know,

00:53:20--> 00:53:22

I don't recall seeing anything that was

00:53:24--> 00:53:33

negative, there was some things published in the magazine the horizon sometime back that was the last I saw but after that, maybe about three years ago.

00:53:35--> 00:53:39

I think the counselors as you know, consists of people who have

00:53:41--> 00:53:46

solid Islamic backgrounds. inshallah, what comes from it can be relied upon

00:54:27--> 00:54:28

our brother,

00:54:33--> 00:54:43

eldest son or son past puberty, you know, any Diwali will be the closest male relative to you whom you cannot marry.

00:54:44--> 00:54:47

You know, also your your uncle.

00:54:49--> 00:54:53

You know, being your father's brother or your mother's brother

00:55:10--> 00:55:15

Well, based on the basic statement of farmers are seldom the valid marriage is not valid, but

00:55:17--> 00:55:28

in a circumstance here, where people may have done that out of ignorance, you know, it can just be rectified, I mean, people should,

00:55:30--> 00:55:33

you know, remarry on the basis of correcting them.

00:55:44--> 00:55:55

Sure, there would be because the the marriage has stood, you know, in ignorance that stood, then the divorce took place, or if a divorce was,

00:55:57--> 00:56:03

you know, properly done according to the procedures, proper procedure for divorce, then it would be considered valid.

00:56:51--> 00:57:05

Well, the general opinion is that a divorce, which does not conform to the requirements for divorce, or what is called a law, video

00:57:06--> 00:57:08

is not considered valid.

00:57:09--> 00:57:17

If it is three in one, then it's considered one not considered as three, but not that it is all canceled.

00:57:20--> 00:57:26

But if it's done in a period, when the woman is not in the period of purity, it is not counted over

00:57:27--> 00:57:42

a period in which they had sexual relations is not counted, you know. So, it was done out of anger, not intending divorce, but just, you know, a statement of anger does not count.

00:57:47--> 00:57:55

Conditional. I mean, there are a number of different circumstances which they have considered these types of divorces invalid.

00:57:56--> 00:57:58

And it's not just nearly the utterance,

00:58:00--> 00:58:08

the utterances in the wrong time or not in accordance with principles in multiple and introduced one, but if it is,

00:58:09--> 00:58:11

in the wrong times, and comes in

00:58:25--> 00:58:27

hanafy in a tiny fee, but Hannah,

00:58:29--> 00:58:38

Hannah, the mother bases, their opinion on the hobbies, and said, there are three things

00:58:42--> 00:58:43

which taken

00:58:46--> 00:58:51

seriously, are serious and when taken in Jeff, are serious.

00:58:54--> 00:58:58

And among them, he mentioned, you know, declaring somebody to be free.

00:59:01--> 00:59:09

That is, if you are a slave when you say they're free, but you say it's in fun, just as a joke. It's taken automatically to be

00:59:11--> 00:59:11

real.

00:59:12--> 00:59:13

And

00:59:14--> 00:59:16

mentioned in there also was the law.

00:59:23--> 00:59:42

However, that might be, you know, has to be taken in light of other statements by paramahansa, salaam, other things which were done in his time, which he approved. And because the NFP labs have given precedence to the IDs and neglected certain others,

00:59:44--> 00:59:59

not due to any fault in the case of Abu hanifa, but due to the fact maybe those narrations didn't reach him to channels that were authentic, or were of questionable authenticity. So he chose to go with what was the most authentic which was that

01:00:00--> 01:00:00

particularization

01:00:23--> 01:00:27

Well, I'm not saying it's gonna be just the one that's, you know, came to my mind.

01:00:28--> 01:00:29

One of the evidence,

01:00:31--> 01:00:40

I'm sure they're not just using just his hobbies, but I'm saying at the same time, we have other hobbies, which

01:00:41--> 01:00:42

indicate

01:00:43--> 01:00:44

that

01:00:45--> 01:00:51

If more than one divorce is pronounced as an instance, this is only counted as one

01:00:52--> 01:00:53

not counted.

01:00:54--> 01:00:58

And the issue of anger.

01:00:59--> 01:01:02

To tell you the truth, I can't really recall the

01:01:04--> 01:01:11

full arguments from both sides. And I'm not really involved too much in divorce cases

01:01:12--> 01:01:20

brushed up in that area, you know, very well. So I wouldn't want to sit here and try to give you the whole

01:01:21--> 01:01:21

issues of

01:01:23--> 01:01:23

why the

01:01:25--> 01:01:27

majority of scholars now hold

01:01:29--> 01:01:43

divorces, which said in anger, or said, intending something else, not intending before intending something else, you know, I'm not classified as divorce

01:02:05--> 01:02:37

mean is one pronouncement of divorce. And if three monthly, menses take place, after that, without them coming back together, then the divorce becomes complete. Meaning that after that divorce, he may re marry her, or before the divorce becomes complete. He may take her back, and that situation may occur another two times on

01:02:39--> 01:02:50

I mean, it doesn't mean that divorce the procedure of divorce isn't taking place, it just means that rather than it being three three, meaning that it is irrevocable, right? By in what they call

01:02:51--> 01:03:03

this irrevocable divorce. This has to take place after a person has been taken back or remarried you know, twice so it's of course on the third time

01:03:28--> 01:03:31

well, as far as I've understood, you know, that it is

01:03:33--> 01:03:41

not from the Sunnah as a regular right, are the regular practice as

01:03:43--> 01:03:52

was evident from the practices of Sahaba and chasing away those people who did it. However, you know, there are some narrations in the Sierra which

01:03:54--> 01:04:09

speak of some circumstances when no taxpayer was somebody call out Allahu Akbar Muslims or sell themselves. I said you know Allahu Akbar and others that repeated it after him on particular instances

01:04:11--> 01:04:15

as to the authenticity of those narrations I am obsessed. But

01:04:18--> 01:04:24

the making it as a as a regular practice that is to replace clapping.

01:04:26--> 01:04:33

You know, because we don't clap in our gatherings replace it by people calling a long walk for long. You know, this type where it becomes

01:04:35--> 01:04:42

a regular ritual, then I believe that this or this would be classified as bizarre.

01:05:11--> 01:05:11

If,

01:05:12--> 01:05:28

in the case of her initial divorce, it wasn't an irrevocable divorce, meaning that you didn't pronounce the words, take her back, pronounce the words take her back within the period of their early marriage.

01:05:29--> 01:05:39

Right, if that did not take place that happened three times a divorce were pronounced on separate occasions in which she was taken back in between.

01:05:40--> 01:06:03

And it was just one divorce pronouncement which fulfilled itself and he can marry again, and he may divorce her. And two years later, or five years later, they decide to get married again, it is possible for them to get married again. But that would be the third time if they divorced again, then she may not marry him again until she has married somebody in another person in a legitimate marriage.

01:07:07--> 01:07:07

Well,

01:07:08--> 01:07:14

I think maybe this question because this is $1 question. Right? You're having a session coming up now.

01:07:15--> 01:07:16

At

01:07:18--> 01:07:24

430 session is a session for our questions. So since this is $1 issue,

01:07:25--> 01:07:35

why don't you save that issue for that? time so that both the brothers because this has to do with men and women, so they can benefit from the discussion on

01:07:38--> 01:07:41

your other questions? Also, and our

01:08:07--> 01:08:13

your your son is five puberty he's 18 he's a practicing Muslim.

01:08:14--> 01:08:16

You wouldn't want to put him in that position.

01:08:34--> 01:08:36

The one who was 18 What is his

01:08:38--> 01:08:44

now but this is what Islam has specified. He is the one who is your

01:08:46--> 01:08:47

he is the best person

01:08:49--> 01:08:50

Yeah.

01:08:52--> 01:09:04

He would be president he may represent you without you even being present if you decide to do it that way or are but the point is that what is what is the most important function of the one?

01:09:14--> 01:09:15

The most important

01:09:18--> 01:09:24

I think role of the Wali is to check out the brother to make sure he is genuine.

01:09:29--> 01:09:29

Well,

01:09:35--> 01:09:35

yeah.

01:09:38--> 01:09:59

But I would say, you know, my advice to sisters still give them a chance. You know, but okay, understanding that, you know, the 18 year olds, in this society tends to be much more immature than an 18 year old would be. No, but I'm just saying even a mature 18 year old in this society would be immature in relationship.

01:10:00--> 01:10:42

mature to 18 year olds in the society of the family problems are seldom, you know, the early generations where people married you know, at the age of 13 and 14 and you know, they were raising families and responsibilities and all these kind of things, okay. So, understanding that and what I would suggest is that still because the law has already defined him as being your Wali, you cannot over pass him and go to somebody else who is not even related to you, you know, but I would suggest that you, you have him or you also choose or the or the amount of the community also choose for you or what kills, you know, somebody who will work along with your family to help him in, in finding a

01:10:42--> 01:10:54

soul but inshallah, you know, I'm sure that your son would be honored to be in that position. And you know, it is his right, and inshallah you should give him the

01:10:55--> 01:10:56

rice was a lot of

01:11:04--> 01:11:06

fun. His father has no say if you're divorced,

01:11:07--> 01:11:12

there's no they have no say Allah, Allah has said, so his father has no say,

01:11:18--> 01:11:31

well, while he is a person who is actually your maharam, you know, who is acting as your guardian, they will kill is somebody who may be appointed.

01:11:33--> 01:11:36

And is not actually the

01:11:38--> 01:11:55

closest guardian. For example, when my daughter got married in Toronto in August, I wasn't able, as in July, it was in August, but in July, I wasn't able to come to Canada, in July. So I appointed my father.

01:11:56--> 01:12:09

Right? Who was Muslim hamdulillah as work here, he is not he wouldn't be well, he, I am the one because I'm her closest male relatives would I can appoint another

01:12:11--> 01:12:17

person who may be from my family and other close member of my family to stand in my place.

01:12:18--> 01:12:46

Right. Similarly, I recall one case of a brother in, in rehab, he was my assistant from Malaysia, and her male relatives were not able to come to Saudi Arabia. So they, what was required of them was that they would send a you know, documents which appointed me as they're working to act on their behalf.

01:12:48--> 01:12:54

So, I will be carrying out the same functions as though as the Wali but it is by appointment

01:12:55--> 01:12:58

as opposed to being the

01:13:00--> 01:13:03

legal guardian of that person.

01:13:11--> 01:13:21

The word kill can be anybody could be a close male, but not the closest or it could be somebody from outside of the family

01:13:24--> 01:13:29

but not a valley the valley is there's only you know the valley is already defined by Sharia is not the point.

01:13:40--> 01:13:47

Didn't have a Mohammed really what what is required of them is Mahara means any male child you know, who has

01:13:48--> 01:13:51

passed the age of purely puberty to accompany them?

01:13:58--> 01:14:16

No, you could not you could have a walk here is for marriage purposes. Or for you know, contracts, you know, say business contracts, you can have an agent to act on your behalf it will kill is like the agent or is the Wali is the Guardian, the legal guardian.

01:14:18--> 01:14:22

Now in terms of travel, you know, the journey

01:14:24--> 01:14:26

of a day and a night.

01:14:28--> 01:14:34

According to the statement, cell phones, I saw London, the woman should be traveling with a maharam.

01:14:38--> 01:14:59

But, again, I would say that in this in the circumstances of North America where people are coming into Islam, you know, without having families around them, who can stand as maharam when certain considerations have to be taken into account, and the position held by some that if a woman travels in a group with

01:15:00--> 01:15:09

A group of other women you know, or were with another family where there is a male presence that would provide

01:15:10--> 01:15:17

safety for that woman, then in these kinds of circumstances, that this may be permissible.

01:16:07--> 01:16:08

Well,

01:16:10--> 01:16:24

in the case where people actually do have, you know, maharam who can travel with them, in such cases, I would say it would not be permissible, because there is no excuse on the part of this particular person,

01:16:25--> 01:16:33

you know, if the people are not able to travel, and then that's, you know, just unfortunate next time some, but,

01:16:35--> 01:16:49

but in the cases where you have people who there is no opportunity at all, they have no maharam. So, given you know, the North American circumstance, mean, then we, you know, we have a circumstance where we can say, okay, we can make some exception here.

01:16:56--> 01:16:57

In the case I've had

01:17:06--> 01:17:07

Well, this is that

01:17:09--> 01:17:21

thing I was asked to test and that's, you know, you have to control yourself when you respond to these things, then you are affecting your own.

01:17:37--> 01:17:39

Know, from an educational point of view, no, it's okay.

01:17:40--> 01:17:45

But I thought you meant like they were saying negative things and you're responding in time.

01:17:49--> 01:18:01

Okay, maybe what I should do is once this is sent some questions for questions right up, top written, so maybe I should answer some of your questions and then get back to you all who are asking directly, okay.

01:18:02--> 01:18:02

Excuse me, one.

01:18:04--> 01:18:06

Please explain in brief the process of cooler

01:18:07--> 01:18:10

when a Muslim woman requested war

01:18:11--> 01:18:24

is it irrevocable, and the woman remarried the same brother, if in fact, he becomes stronger in his deeds, once it is settled? Is there a waiting period or is it final

01:18:26--> 01:18:26

The process

01:18:28--> 01:18:38

involves the woman requesting here it would be from the court or if there is a normally in a Muslim country to be requesting from the courts.

01:18:40--> 01:18:46

In the community circumstance where marriages are taking place in the masjid, you know,

01:18:48--> 01:19:00

then the group of brothers or sisters or groups that handles the issues of marriage, if they have a council, then this

01:19:01--> 01:19:03

case should be raised to them.

01:19:09--> 01:19:13

The procedure usually involves questioning the man

01:19:15--> 01:19:15

and

01:19:17--> 01:19:22

advising him according to his son anyway advising him to

01:19:23--> 01:19:25

let the woman go she returned the

01:19:28--> 01:19:34

Maha that has been given and then the cola comes into effect.

01:19:36--> 01:19:38

Some scholars call it is irrevocable

01:19:40--> 01:19:43

because this is an area which the Shetty Archie didn't specify.

01:19:45--> 01:19:47

Whereas, others hold that it is not.

01:19:48--> 01:19:50

Perhaps that it is not as more

01:19:52--> 01:19:54

closer seeing that

01:19:57--> 01:19:59

the basic position in divorce

01:20:00--> 01:20:02

says that people can remarry afterwards.

01:20:03--> 01:20:06

Or even in the case of atonement that people can marry afterwards.

01:20:10--> 01:20:12

Can the woman marry the same brother? Yes.

01:20:14--> 01:20:20

That is understanding that it is not irrevocable returns.

01:20:22--> 01:20:34

And the waiting period, according to inquiry was one month. However, scholars have been generally speaking set it as three months, same three months.

01:20:36--> 01:20:48

And the actual evidence is from from this, why they've chosen the three over the one which is clear and viable. I am not certain I don't really recall, but it is quite a long time ago.

01:20:50--> 01:21:00

So, you know, people want to get the details of the evidences and really to ask somebody who was, you know, directly out of city was more familiar with the arguments.

01:21:07--> 01:21:08

In terms of the reason,

01:21:09--> 01:21:25

the committee or the courts may ask the woman what the reasons are, and try to encourage her to not proceed, if the reasons are not really major reasons, but tend to be sort of minor.

01:21:27--> 01:21:31

But it is her right to speak as if she feels strongly enough,

01:21:32--> 01:21:33

about

01:21:36--> 01:21:37

the second question

01:21:38--> 01:21:42

can be then be called before the actual time of salon

01:21:43--> 01:21:44

can be done.

01:21:46--> 01:22:06

Or do we have to wait until the time of prayer to come before you can do any of the above he has done is to be given at the time of the prayer itself, that is the event which indicates, you know, coming in of the time of prayer, and from that point, then the voluntary recommended voluntary prayers can be done

01:22:07--> 01:22:11

should not be given before its time. The only exception being

01:22:13--> 01:22:15

the LAN which is made before

01:22:16--> 01:22:16

budget,

01:22:18--> 01:22:20

according to instructions.

01:22:22--> 01:22:37

In order for people, it's like a warner, it's not really a than to say, it's an event, but not an alarm in the sense that it indicates time for prayer. But it's just a warning to let people know that the time for pleasure was coming in for them to hurry up and finish their

01:22:39--> 01:22:39

eating or whatever.

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Third question, in reference to marriage, I was married about five years prior to Islam. Still, marriage in Islam is different. It's a totally different mindset. So I asked you advice on where the individuality comes into play.

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Sometimes I don't feel I have the right to express my feelings, or

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that they don't matter anymore. Because I'm a wife, and my husband couldn't be my gender or my non

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financial help. Where's the line drawn? Well, marriage should be

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based on communication.

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And a woman does have the right to express their feelings.

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Of course, Islam encourages both man and woman to express their feelings within

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a

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context, which is positive, you know, that. It's not, as in pre Islamic times where people shout off with each other, and, you know, use that language and you know, all these kind of things. And it shouldn't be within that kind of a context, but using, you know, with showing proper respect and all these other things. So people should communicate your feelings, the problems and a woman should not feel that her feelings don't matter that she shouldn't express her feelings assessor, of course.

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So I don't

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have the line, I would say where the line is drawn is that you know, it should not be in a way which is displeasing to Allah, where we're persons using curse words or you know, using very loud tone, very disrespectful kind of manner, you know, these are the things which are

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really not permissible. And that's where we would draw the line with otherwise communication is vital for your marriage to function in, in the way that it was intended. You know, a lot of said that he created mates that

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we dwell in

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tranquility. You know, tranquility can really only be there when hearts are at rest. People are reminding each other of a law. You know, there's communication. Both are, you know, they're helping each other to serve a lot.

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The last question, in reference to the question asked about voting in the earlier session.

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Does this mean it's okay to sit on jewelry for jury duty? Seems

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like it says it's okay to uphold the capital laws. We continuously uphold them by voting on jury, how is that ever going to help the Muslim community, especially the one suffering so terribly?

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Next, some Muslims may think it's okay to run for office within local government. Now,

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I don't see the relationship between

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voting

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and helping the Muslim community those who are suffering terribly.

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I don't really see the relationship.

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I mean, we're voting to try to prevent some

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greater evil in our community or our states or in the country.

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That doesn't remove our responsibilities to help those Muslims that are suffering those that are in need.

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In terms of jury duty,

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if one were sitting on a jury,

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and a case is presented, one would

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take a position based on what would be classified as right and wrong with regards to Islam.

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You know, to the degree that it's able to be implemented because for example, if for example, in the case of rape, according to Islamic law, this person to be executed.

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Now,

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if we don't have Islamic law, which we don't hear,

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in a community, we cannot

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punish that person, we have no means of punishing that person for the acts that they did. So the states here, pick this person up, and at least according to their laws, some punishment is to be meted out. For you to be a part of the process of helping mete out some punishment for that individual. This is positive.

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This is not negative.