Duties Of A Muslim Husband Towards His Wife

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Bilal Philips

Channel: Bilal Philips

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He was suffering, he ministered medicine at Loma de

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operate due to a law and the law of Peace and blessings on his last prophet muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and and all those who follow the path of righteousness until the last day.

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The topic, which I've been asked to present this evening is that of the duties of a Muslim husband, towards his wife.

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Now, the duties of a Muslim husband may be divided into two main areas, consistent with the general realities of human constitution,

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that of being spiritual, and also of being material.

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Man is essentially a spiritual being closed in a material body, and an existing in a material world.

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However,

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in this life, he is primarily enjoined by his creator, to make the spiritual act of submission of his body and soul, to the divine requirements, or in simple terms, to worship god alone.

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This requirement is fundamentally a spiritual one, because the outward submission of the body parts, without an inward spiritual acceptance of the Divine will quickly decays into a set of meaningless rituals, totally unacceptable to God, and completely ineffective in affecting men spiritual growth, for which they were designed.

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Of course, an exception has to be made here. In the case of children, you know, who may be taught the rituals of worship, that is formal prayer, fasting, pilgrimage, etc, if they're in the visited facility of Mecca, and they thought this from an early age from the age of seven.

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And

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this is in order for these

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practices, religious practices to become natural for them

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with the intent that at a later point in time, they would

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come to understand the purpose of these various acts of worship, you know, once they reach the age of what we call the Age of Reason, then they will be taught, what are the goals, spiritual goals behind them, so that the acts that they will be doing would then take on its full meaning and be a force of change and guidance in the life of the human being.

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Now when considering the duties of a Muslim husband,

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it is then necessary to begin with the most important aspect of a human beings life is spiritual guidance.

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So the first duty of a Muslim husband

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is to provide spiritual guidance for his wife.

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marriage was ordained in Islam as a vehicle to help human beings submit their wills to Allah.

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All aspects of life, when done in accordance with divine guidance, become acts of worship.

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Worship essentially being doing what pleases God in the form and avoiding what displeases him.

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Marriage in an Islamic concept in Islamic context, may then be considered a rites of worship, enabling men to effectively submit his will to the Creator.

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Consequently, the last prophet of God was reported to have said, when a servant of a mom marries, he has completed half of his religion or half of his religious obligations, and he must then share a law in order to complete the second half this hadith is authentic found in miscalculate Fabius.

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A working Islamic marriage

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teams one of the most powerful drives in men, and provides him with psychological and emotional support to handle the difficulties of this material world.

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As the leader of the family, men are then responsible to set the tone of the relationship.

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For it to be successful, it must be religious, that is successful from an Islamic point of view. And it is ultimately the husband who will determine the course of the relationship. It is not the right of the wife to receive spiritual direction from her husband, in order for the marriage to function as a religious institution, facilitating the worship of God

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and it is primarily the infusion of spiritual guidance into the male female relationship, which transforms marriage from an animal acts of cohabitation into a spiritual act of submission to the Divine Will.

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The principle of spiritual guidance

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may also necessitate the assertion of authority on the part of the husband where the bounds of Islam are being crossed. He must restrain his family from crossing them. For example, it is his duty to stop his wife from leaving the house. improperly dressed, likewise is required to prevent her from leaving the home, wearing perfume, if she will be in the presence of men, unrelated to her. Of course, this is based on a narration by Abu Musa, in which he quoted apart from homicides, lm is saying, every iying is adulterous. And when a woman perfumes herself and passes the company of men, she is an adulterous.

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What we're saying here

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is that it is the duty of the men to stop his wife from leaving the home

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in a fashion, which would be contravening the rules of Islam.

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And this is the duty that he has towards his wife to ensure that she maintain the correct Islamic dress, motive dress. And the way she carries herself should be according to Islamic principles, in order to protect herself not just externally, but internally.

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It is also a duty to prevent her from watching movies and videos which contain haram haram acts are seen and from reading books and magazines whose contents are prohibited islamically. And of course, one of the best ways of preventing is to himself be an example.

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So, he could not be preventing her.

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If he himself is watching these things, I mean, he just has to keep these things out of his home in general, he himself should not indulge in it, nor should he allow his wife to indulge in it. And in this way,

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he is fulfilling the duty of providing spiritual guidance in the home providing spiritual guidance to his wife, which is his primary duty.

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The second principle, which may be

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looked at as being an aspect of his guidance, is that of education. Because guidance is required not only in the basic Pillars of Islam, but also in the various contexts that the family has with the community within which it exists. The beginning point for guidance is education. Thus, it is the duty of the Muslim husband to be religiously educated himself, and to see that his wife also receive a good religious education. Accordingly, the prophet was reported to have said that seeking knowledge is compulsory in every Muslim. This prophetic statement and many others emphasize the critical importance of education to every member of the Muslim community. The implementation of this

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principle in the home may take a variety of forms, which are too many to lists. For example, the husband should teach what he knows. And the more he knows, the more he has to teach. Islamic books, tapes, magazines, etc. Should be purchased or bored in order to develop an Islamic environment in the home. The wife should also be encouraged to attend women's Islamic circles, or Islamic courses, if available, and the family Well, that's if it's available in the family circumstances permit.

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The end result should be that the wife become well informed about who God is, and what are in watts for up to God lies. The Muslim husband spiritual responsibilities to his wife have to be discharged within an appropriate atmosphere for them to be successfully fulfilled. Spiritual goals cannot be forced or dictated. Harsh method methods would only discourage or make the uninterrupted wife more adamant in her rejection of guidance or advice. Allow refer to this reality in his communication with the Prophet Muhammad SAW SLM as follows

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it is a part of a loss mercy that you deal gently with them. For if you were severe or harsh hearted, they would have fled from around you. So overlook their faults, and ask forgiveness for them and consult them in the affairs of the moment.

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And the third surah verse 159.

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This guidance and education of wives can only be encouraged, supported and nurtured through gentle methods. such methods cannot be confined only to specific occasions, but must be the general rule in the Muslim husband's treatment of his wife. So from there, we then go into the duties that are related to the more material aspects of the relationship.

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The first of those duties which could be different

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In this series is that the kindness? The overall character of the Muslim husbands relationship to his wife, in the material sphere is one of kindness. Allah says in Surah Nisa, verse 19. ob leavers, you are forbidden to inherit women against their will. And this is in reference to a practice in the period of ignorance, Jamelia when it was the customer stepsons brothers, to take possession of a dead man's widow, along with his wealth, so a lot for him, etc. and nor should you treat them harshly in order to take back a part of the diary, which you gave them.

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This is also again, in reference to certain free Islamic practices,

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except where they have been guilty of open lewdness. Instead, you should live with them in kindness and equity, and the term used here, which has been translated as kind of an equities model. And if you dislike them, perhaps you dislike something in which Allah has placed much good.

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This is Surah Nisa, verse 19.

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The term used in this planning verse to describe the way in which husbands should treat their wives is model,

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which literally means known, it refers to good humanitarian practices, which are well known in all societies, by the way of divinely inspired instinct.

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So ashampoo, verses seven and eight by the soul and the proportion given to it, inspiring it to know right from wrong. So, when a law speaks about

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living, and treating wives, with what is known as models, this is

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a large referring here to the things which are known in all societies, by nature by human instincts, which a lot was putting each and every individual to know what is good, and what is not good. So a lot doesn't have to go into the details and explain exactly how he should treat it. He just uses the term

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that which is known.

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Allah uses the same term in his description of the basis for the superiority of the Muslim nation above all other nations. A law says, you have the best of nations selected for mankind, because you enjoin the good, which is the model and forbid the evil referred to as mooncup. And you believe in a law.

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So, this is the basis which makes Islam and the Muslim nation superior to all other nations. And this is the basis

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of a correct Islamic relationship, marital relationship, wherein, the husband enjoys that model.

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He enjoys the models that his wife should be doing, and he enjoys model fun himself in his treatment of the wife.

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The proper treatment of rhymes is something essentially obvious, not really requiring a detailed explanation. However, because male dominated society, which had strayed far from the divine path, and developed so many deeply entrenched, oppressive customs and in its treatment of women, a lot directly addressed in the Quran, the most common and recurring examples, and He further attacks them indirectly, by way of the prophetic example.

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Consequently, there are many authentically reported statements of the Prophet Mohammed Salah Salem, in which he enjoined the males to be equitable in the treatment of women in their care. For example, Ayesha quoted the Messenger of Allah sallallahu Sallam as saying, the best of you is the one who is best to his family, and I am the best of you to his family. The companions are always striving to outdo each other, as allied commanded in the Quran. For each of the goals which he turns, so seek to outdo each other in righteousness. So in Baccarat, verse 148. And in ceramide, verse 48, had a law wills, He could have made you a single nation, but he has not done so in order to test you in what

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you've given you. So seek to outdo each other in righteousness. Therefore, when the Prophet Muhammad SAW Solomon formed, his companions have a means to be the best to outdo the rest, they would naturally try their utmost to implement that way. Furthermore, the Prophet Muhammad SAW seldom, who was the best example of Islamic conduct,

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inform them, that the way in which he treated his family was the ideal way for which they should strive.

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He also linked kind treatment of wise to the highest levels of faith by saying the most perfect of the believers in faith

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is the best of them in character, and the best of you and character is He who is best to his family. And of course, when the term family is used here, it refers to the family in general in refers to the wife in specific first statements cannot create an unbelieving husband, an acute awareness of the importance of displaying kindness when dealing with his wife. And when we shift over to the economic sphere, into the area of spending, which is part of that material side of the relationship, where kindness has also to be displayed,

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we find a law addressing the economic issues saying, lodge them where you are lodging according to your means, and do not farm them to make life difficult for them. Let the man have plenty spend out of his 20 as for him whose provision is limited, that in spend a lot of what Allah has given to Surah talaaq or six, and seven, you know, here and allies enjoin men to maintain their women according to a reasonable standard. The Prophet Muhammad wa sallam further elaborated on this divine command, by specifically stating on a number of occasions, that it was the woman's right to be clothed and fed according to the man's means.

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During the farewell pilgrimage, he was reported by Abu huraira, it was said, You have gotten rights over women, whereby they're not allowed to let anyone into your home whom you dislike. If they disobey you, you may hit them and the woman's rights on you is that you should close her and feed her justly return us here again for justly his model.

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And another Hadees reported by Mahalia and Cushing.

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He quoted the farmhouse as Alan was saying, in a way that is when the prophet SAW Selim was asked about the rights of women regarding men. She said, that you feed her when you get food to eat, and you close her when you get clothing,

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even gave permission for women to take from their stingy husbands

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their own needs.

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Isaiah reported that hint even

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as a messenger of Allah, I will soufiane is a miser, he does not give me enough for my children and myself, unless I take it from him without his knowledge from homicides and then replied, take what is reasonable, the same term mouth is used again here for you and your children's needs. This is in February. So we find that the sooner the way of the problems that some of them have tackled some of the basic issues concerning the economic needs within the family, and emphasize the importance of men fulfilling those needs for the woman.

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But in order to further encourage men to look after economic the economic needs of the women, he pointed out the spending of woman's money on one's wife was the best way in which money could be spent. So Ben reported that allowes messenger said, the best dinar a man spends is the one spent on his family.

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And furthermore, if a man spends on his family for the pleasure of Allah, it becomes an act of worship. I boumous roads related that he heard the Prophet Muhammad wa sallam say, whenever a Muslim spend something for his family, anticipating his reward in the Hereafter, it is recorded for him as an act of charity.

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These recommendations provide part of the necessary reinforcement for the principal role of the male as provided protector and maintainer of the females, which has been clearly stated by law in the crime. So in the cyber 34 men are the protectors and maintainer is a woman, because the law has given one more strength than the other, and because they support them from their means.

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The next principle, which is the fifth in the series of principles, which identify the duties of the husband to the wife, is that of gentleness.

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Due to the differences in the psychological makeup of men and women were in women tend to be more emotionally high strung and deeply sensitive advice has been given to them to be particularly gentle in their admonition of women. The Prophet Muhammad SAW his hand and said, Whoever believes in a law the last day should not hurt his neighbor, and should admonish women in a good way. For they have been created for me rip

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and the most crooked part of a rib is its upper part. If you try to force it straight, it will break and if you leave it alone, it will remain crooked. So give advice to women accordingly.

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On another occasion, he said

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Certainly women are created from a rib, which will never become straight on a path for you ever, for you to enjoy her, you will have to do so while she is cooking. And if you try to straighten her, you will break her and breaking her is her divorce.

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That's although the reins of authority within the family

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and in society in general, have been placed firmly in the man's hands, by the text of the Quran.

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For example, so Baqarah verse 228. And women have rights corresponding to the obligations

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on them,

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according to what is equitable, but men have a degree over them.

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Men have been called to exercise their authority in a gentle manner, befitting the sensitive and delicate nature of women. For the primary goal of marriage is tranquility, what a lot of refers to in the Quran, the second for the soul, within the ever changing flow of hardships and struggles, which constitute

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human life. And of course, this is in reference to the fact that a life said we most certainly have created man in a life of toil and struggle

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to balance first four, and then and then ship hopper six, he said, Oh mankind, surely you continue to toil towards your Lord, then you will meet him. So human beings are caught up in this

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ever changing flow of hardships and struggles in life. And marriage is there to provide some tranquility for the soul in the midst of these trials.

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It is a blessing which God has given man to reflect on, and lead him to submit his will, to the divine.

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And among his sciences, and so our rooms, verse 21. And among the signs is this, that he created from you, or for you made from among yourself, that you might live with them in tranquility. And he has put love and mercy between your hearts. Surely, these are Signs for those who reflect.

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So, a man is then obliged to

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admonish his wife in a fashion which defeats her state of

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have,

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we said, being emotionally, very sensitive.

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And

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a state which

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has departments as Alan has, has

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made an example of compared with the grip.

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And the terms used are as translated as being crooked not, this is not meaning in the English context, we might look at crooked as meaning somebody who is, you know, twisted or deviant. It's not in this sense, but having an emotional nature, which is unchangeable.

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Something which no matter what you do, it is not going to change. I mean, the example we have from the lives of the wives of the Prophet Muhammad, Allah, when we think of the whys of the customer, for love, they're referred to as the mothers of the believers. You know, Muhammad, we mean, however, we, when we read into the stories of their lives, we find jealousies.

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Low there, that's the example. You know, in terms of righteousness, and charity, and all the different good things. And the same time we see certain qualities, qualities of jealousy, which caused them to do certain, you know, pranks amongst each other. You know, it's been quite funny when we read about it. But what it's showing us is that no matter what stage a woman reaches, in general, the general situation for women, there are certain qualities like that of jealousy, etc, which are not going to go, they're not going to change. So it's going to cause her to act in certain particular ways. So, it is required of him and this is his duty to recognize this reality and accept

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this reality, but guidance correctly.

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And in added, which was mentioned earlier, we find something some reference there to meeting is very important, this is, you know, it is the rights have been given to a man to beat his wife, however,

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it is the right of the wife that that beating the light.

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And this is very important, because the issue of you know, abuse in relationships is one which is

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quite rampant and quite, you know,

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destructive to the family structure affecting psychologically The, the makeup of both the wife and the children as well as the man himself was involved.

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such acts. And it is something which, you know, is very widespread in the West Nile. And it's, and it does appear in Muslim families also, you know where women will be complaining of their wives, their husbands, abusing them physically abusing them.

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The approach of the West is that meeting is canceled. It just is not allowed for a man to strike his wife. However, this is something which has been made permissible in the crime itself. In 25, verse 34,

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alive given permission for the man to beat his wife, but it's very important that we understand

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what is the context and how it should take place.

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In surah, An Nisa verse 34. A law says, as to those women on whose parts you fear ill conduct, and manage them first, then refuse to share their beds. And lastly, be

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put in an order. It's not, if the wife does something that you don't like, immediately, the first thing you do is, you know, you beat her. So it's important to understand that it is this this is like the last resort, not a first resort.

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And we should also keep in mind that this meeting is not supposed to be a bone crushing, jaw breaking pummeling affair designed to inflict the maximum of 10. Consequently, the mind somehow quoted the prophesize element saying, none of us should flog his wife, the way a slave was flogged, then have sex with her at the end of the day. And on another occasion, he said, You have rights over them, that they do not entertain as a guest, anyone whom you dislike. If they do so, you may hit them in a way which does not cause injury.

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Nor should the meeting include face laughs and curses. As the problem of SLM to the companion who had asked about the rights of women in marriage, it is that you give her food when you eat closer when you close yourself, that you do not slap her in the face, cursor, or sleep separate from from her except in your own home. So the slapping in the face is not a means what would have the allowance for hitting this is not included. And it should not also include cursing, actually slapping in the faces other notes statements are the fastest

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way for me slapping in the face of any

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living beings, even animals. We're not allowed to strike them in the face, and also even the practice of treating children in the face. This is also prohibited in Islam.

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This allowance, that is the allowance for hitting a woman in a fashion which is

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which does not cause injury is therefore cases where it becomes necessary. For some women attempts of persuasion to admonition and a denial of sex may have little or no effect. While meeting may bring about the desired response. However, this should not be the norm in a relationship. Otherwise it would deteriorate into a criminal act of physical abuse. The best method of discipline, after admonition is that used by the prophet Muhammad wa sallam, he would simply avoid his wives in bed, I should have pointed that he wants to or not to sleep with his wife for a whole month.

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The seventh duty

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relates to hate.

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Much of the responsibility of creating a pleasing atmosphere in the home is the duty of the woman due to the fact that she that it is her normal and natural domain. While her husband is required to brave the difficulties of the outside world in order to provide for his home. The efforts on both parts must be appreciated, for there to be an air of tranquility and love in the home. Consequently, the Prophet Muhammad wa sallam prohibited the husband from developing or expressing feelings of hate for a spouse.

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Or whoever quoted him as saying no believing men should hate a believing woman. For if he hates one of her character traits, you'd be pleased with some other traits.

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This prophetic recommendation contains the general principle of not concentrating on a person's defects because everyone has some defects.

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For contentment to be achieved, one must look at the brighter side. Otherwise one will always be

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in a state of

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discontentment due to unfulfilled desires.

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It is a part of human nature, that the grass always greener on the other side. Or as the prophet SAW Selim put it, the man had the value of gold, he would wish for another and nothing will fill a man's stomach except the dirt of his grave.

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Knowing that the Muslim husband has to focus on the good qualities of his wife and thank God

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For them, while remembering the prophetic saying, the whole world is a commodity, and the best of the world's commodity commodities, is the righteous wife.

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The last principle that I wanted to mention of the duties of the wife, the husband to the wife is that of play. Entertainment is a part of social of the social life of human beings outside of the Islamic framework and takes up much of man's energy, and were no bounds or sets the entertainment industry unleashes a steady barrage of corruption, consuming hard earned cash for a few moments of fun.

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recognising the need for entertainment Islam was permitted only the forms which have a positive effect on the society. Since

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his wife, the prophet Mohammed Salim said, everything with which a man plays is unlawful, except shooting with his both training his horse and playing with his wife. Surely these pastimes are correct. And it reported that Jana footrace was the Messenger of Allah, while they were on a journey. And she beat him over when she later gained weight, she raised him, and he beats her and said, This one is for the other.

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So it is important for the husband, also in his relationship with his duty, to be friendly and playful with his wife to provide an atmosphere of entertainment within the home, otherwise, people will seek

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fun or entertainment, through means which are not acceptable islamically. Now, the duties of a Muslim husband, you know, are much more than what I've mentioned. However, I just wanted to touch on these, because these are ones which are usually not spoken about the especially those concerning guidance and education.

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The tendency is to speak more about the physical aspects, in terms of providing economics etc. However, we have to keep in mind that since the human being is primarily a spiritual means,

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and the purpose of this life is for us to develop the higher spiritual qualities to become the kind of spiritual beings which Allah had designed us to be, it means, then that's the most important new thing within a Muslim marriage is to provide guidance for the wife. And I'm going to stop here and entertain any questions that the sisters may have concerning the duties of a Muslim husband. And I'm sure you have many that you would like to ask about.

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Some papers have been distributed. So

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if these can be questions can be written on them, and submitted then inshallah we can try to answer whatever questions have been raised.

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The first question

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is, what are the husbands and wives responsibility

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to the parents of the wife, who are non Muslim, and have difficulty in accepting their daughter, as a Muslim?

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It is their duty to continue to try to

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deal with them in a kind

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and helpful manner,

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that they should use this as a means of

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conveying Islam to them in practice, because we should never give up on people until they're dead. Once they're dead, then of course, our bond is broken. If the parents of guided non Muslims were not allowed to pray for them.

00:34:18--> 00:34:23

So while they're living, then we have the duty of trying to convey Islam to them.

00:34:25--> 00:34:35

If they don't want to accept that the daughters accepted Islam, of course, it says make the situation a bit uncomfortable. But

00:34:36--> 00:34:41

usually with the coming of children, you know, this starts to change their attitudes somewhat.

00:34:43--> 00:34:44

And if

00:34:45--> 00:34:47

people continue to, to

00:34:49--> 00:34:58

deal with them kindly, eventually, you know, it's quite possible that it will cause a change. You know, Allah says, you know, in the Quran

00:35:00--> 00:35:00

That

00:35:02--> 00:35:52

if one, you know, repels evil with good, that is their their evil reactions or their negative reactions, if this is repelled with good, then you will find that the one who was your worst of energy enemies would become one of your closest friends. And there are many examples, you know, that we have seen in America, in the West in general, you know, where parents, you know, have been opposed for long periods of time, and then eventually they became Muslims and became very strong supporters of this family. So, we always, as Muslims, we try to keep the best outlook, we think towards the best we recognize this possibility. And so we will continue to strive to, to give good

00:35:52--> 00:36:02

when they give negativity and evil or whatever we give good back to them, to the degree that we can even reach the stage where it's starting now to affect one's Islam.

00:36:03--> 00:36:15

You know, the doctor is finding that, you know, becomes becoming difficult for her to practice Islam, because of those parents, then they may be obliged to cut those relationships,

00:36:16--> 00:36:22

to the degree that it is necessary to protect the Islam of the wife or on the children.

00:36:29--> 00:36:35

Question number two, what you are saying about a husband duties is true. However it is it only works.

00:36:37--> 00:36:40

That way, if the husband is practicing Islam,

00:36:41--> 00:36:47

what advice do you give to the woman who is trying to practice or Islam and her husband? Doesn't?

00:36:54--> 00:37:02

What advice would you give someone who knows a family that is falling apart? Okay, the second question, same person writing, okay.

00:37:06--> 00:37:09

A woman in that type of a situation

00:37:12--> 00:37:12

has to

00:37:14--> 00:38:03

continue to strive to the degree that she's able to encourage her husband to practice if she can be around other Muslim women who are practicing, and whose husbands may then be encouraged or asked to bring this person into their circle to influence because much of this has to do with the type of people that the person is involved with a man who hangs around with nonpracticing so called Muslims, then is likely to be a similar type of person, but when such a person is invited into circles of people are practicing and, and he moves around with these people, after a period of time, this starts to rub off on him, and it starts to improve that individuals, I would suggest that, you know,

00:38:03--> 00:38:04

such as sister would

00:38:05--> 00:38:13

try to get her husband, you know, involved in the circles of the other practicing as you know, good Muslims, so that some of that

00:38:15--> 00:38:24

these qualities, and they start to rub off on the individual and, and, you know, change his own approach. Of course, if

00:38:26--> 00:38:27

the husband's

00:38:28--> 00:38:40

attitudes are actually preventing the woman from practicing Ursula, she has been stopped from practicing hurts, then such a relationship with his mother that she,

00:38:42--> 00:39:06

you know, she's able to get out of it. And it's better that she gets out of it. Actually, some of the scholars here, you know, have ruled that a woman who is married Muslim woman who is married to a husband doesn't make a lot, you know, that this marriage is becomes invalid. Because if he doesn't make the law, then he has left the bounds of Islam and is prohibited for Muslim woman to be married to such an individual.

00:39:08--> 00:39:52

Because this is, you know, this is worth and even been married to a Christian isn't mandatory, total disbelief. I mean, of course, this is based on the on the precept or principle that the person who stops praying or who does not praying is a disbeliever. Some scholars hold that such a person is not a disbeliever. You know, unless he actually opens openly expresses belief, disbelief, like, I don't believe that prayer is necessary at all, in a person who's not praying, but he believes we should be praying is not would not be considered to be a disbeliever in that full sense, which breaks the bounds of the bonds of marriage. He's a disbeliever in practice, or we call Cooper homily, as

00:39:52--> 00:39:59

opposed to disbeliever in his heart, we call for a call for call be the one where the disbelief has actually entered in the house.

00:40:00--> 00:40:33

has gone beyond the practice of is the one which breaks the bonds. You know, this is. So I would say that, you know, if the woman's husband has not reached that state of disbelief where the disbelief is not it's actually in the heart, if he does believe, but he's just not practicing that she should continue to work with him and try to get other people to work with him. But it was an individual who has actually disbelieved in his heart, I mean, this person is crazy, does not believe in God or whatever, you know, doesn't believe in Islam, then it is actually prohibited islamically for her to remain married to such an individual.

00:40:34--> 00:40:40

The second question, what advice would you give to someone who knows a family and is falling apart?

00:40:41--> 00:40:45

They are Muslim and the children are suffering, what should our duties be?

00:40:46--> 00:40:57

Well, our duty should be to try to keep the family together as long as the reasons why the breakup

00:40:58--> 00:41:00

is taking place or reasons which are not

00:41:01--> 00:41:03

valid reasons Islamic

00:41:04--> 00:41:42

and open to the case, as you mentioned, where you know, one or other has become a non Muslim, in fact, you know, in the heart, and that breakup is necessary. But whereas the question of misunderstandings, you know, what's usually developed in relationships, etc, then we should try to arbitrate, we should try to intervene, and to try to bring them back together. I mean, this is why we know in Islam, the process of divorce is one wherein arbiter arbitrators should be brought in if possible, and this is the way the Muslim society would really function and when people are married, you're married, two families are coming together as opposed to just two individuals. The problem

00:41:42--> 00:42:12

which arises is when a person either people, two people from the west marry, or it ends up being two individuals is no longer two families or a person from Muslim society married the person from the west, where it is a family, but then you're dealing with one individual, this is where you know, this type of support may not be so readily available, when the families should get involved. So brothers, relatives, uncles, etc, you know, she tried to be involved in trying to stop such a breakdown from taking place.

00:42:13--> 00:42:38

In first cases, especially, it becomes a duty of those who are friends of theirs, to try to, to resolve help them to resolve the problems, to take the sister aside and try to find outside to get to what the root of the problem is. And, you know, her sister may have found out maybe related to her husband, who may in turn, speak back to the husband, who was you know, in the position of

00:42:40--> 00:42:57

family breakup, you know, in in trying to, to encourage that person to see the realities of the problem or to encourage the person to, to sit with some people who may, you know, listen to the issues and offer some kind of solutions for them.

00:42:59--> 00:43:00

In terms of the children,

00:43:01--> 00:43:17

of course, you know, it is our duty to try to, to bring the children and try to advise them and, and to help them as much as we can because for children, it's usually very difficult for them to comprehend and what is going on with adults especially in the case of family breakups.

00:43:26--> 00:43:27

Next question,

00:43:30--> 00:43:33

if a person is convinced, and they are bothered or made

00:43:35--> 00:43:38

by the evil eye, what is the correct method of treatment?

00:43:39--> 00:43:40

Some say

00:43:42--> 00:43:59

saffron Inc. used to write the Quran on a paper, then soak the paper and drink the water, some say shift blowing into water or anyone for that matter, and same crime and then drinking the water. Another way is if you think you know,

00:44:01--> 00:44:08

where the I coming from the evil eye that is, you take something from that person,

00:44:09--> 00:44:14

such as, after they have eaten days, take the pin socket.

00:44:16--> 00:44:18

Coming from evil as

00:44:20--> 00:44:22

you take something from that person,

00:44:23--> 00:44:29

such as, after they have eaten, they take the pit, soak it in water and drink it

00:44:30--> 00:44:31

or after they've

00:44:33--> 00:44:40

walked somewhere sweep up some of the dust. They have walked me through it and watch and get it settled and drink it.

00:44:41--> 00:44:53

I want to say I don't agree with these forms of treatment. I don't know where to find out what is right and what is wrong. People who are using these methods are convinced totally in the cure.

00:45:01--> 00:45:01

Now,

00:45:03--> 00:45:04

the concept

00:45:06--> 00:45:06

of

00:45:07--> 00:45:10

writing the Quran or Quranic verses

00:45:11--> 00:45:13

in in from

00:45:15--> 00:45:23

plant sources or whatever is not harmful in Washington drinking water this is something which has been practiced by early Muslims

00:45:25--> 00:45:28

It is not something which the Prophet Mongols practice.

00:45:30--> 00:45:33

So, some scholars are not in favor of it

00:45:37--> 00:45:38

the reputation

00:45:40--> 00:45:47

of an overwater This is something which was practiced by the companions of the public and approved by the public.

00:45:49--> 00:45:53

So, this method, you know, definitely is an acceptable method.

00:45:56--> 00:46:19

The last one, which is of taking something from the person after they've eaten or collecting the dust that they walked on, this sounds the finest outcome and this I don't think this has any basis at all, not from what I have never seen anything in Quran or Hadith which in any way supports, sounds to be fairly beyond the bounds of norm.

00:46:24--> 00:46:25

We have the code

00:46:27--> 00:46:43

which the farmer has, which are revealed to him for protection from the effects of evil, evil, particularly in his case, it was in the form of magic. However, we know in that first of the portals where he says

00:46:44--> 00:46:50

amin has hidden in there, where you're seeking refuge in a law from

00:46:52--> 00:46:56

form of jealousy or envy, you know, which is usually referred to in the end as evil.

00:46:58--> 00:47:01

So one to me may decide

00:47:03--> 00:47:07

as departments or felonies to do before going to bed, in His sight, the

00:47:09--> 00:47:10

clouds rubbing

00:47:12--> 00:47:18

into his hands and blow in his hands, wipe it over his body, which is what he would do.

00:47:20--> 00:47:33

One may use the sewage recycling resource on different occasions, recycling them over water and drinking the water. These are acceptable methods of trying to cure oneself from the why, but ultimately,

00:47:34--> 00:47:52

one has to believe strongly that it is in the hands of a law that one will be cured through these methods, two methods which have been prescribed by the family, which he used himself for which he did in

00:47:54--> 00:47:58

his companion. So, I mean, one has to have that, that

00:47:59--> 00:48:10

that conviction that a law can cure them from such harm can protect them from such harm. And with that conviction, inshallah one will be protected.

00:48:12--> 00:48:50

But it doesn't mean that one will not be affected. Because the Prophet Muhammad Hassan was affected by magic means that no matter what you do, ultimately, I mean, you're not, it's not possible for you to create an air of perfect perfection of protection around yourself all the time. It means that you use the different methods it's properly taught, you know, of reciting the soil buffer in your home, you know of the last verse sort of Bukhara, you know, it of course, you have two different prayers, you know, different drives which he gave before going into the bathrooms taking refuge in Allah know right in different occasions, you when you come into your home, you know, calling on a law using the

00:48:50--> 00:49:29

laws name, all these different things are our practices which help to create the kind of a wall of protection around yourself, but it is not possible to create one which is perfect means at times that you know, you may not so you may be affected. However, the reality is that these are means which a lot provided to us. And for us to protect ourselves, we should avail ourselves of it, not just in the time. When you feel some problem. This is when we start to use it. That no this should become a part of our daily norm for going into the bathroom before we come into our homes, even our homes, putting on a closed event.

00:49:31--> 00:49:38

Fishing should become a part of the daily life. In that way, we can help ourselves protect yourself.

00:49:42--> 00:49:56

The next question, there is a controversy concerning whether or not it is permissible for a woman to read the Quran during the time of momentous. What is the most widely widely held tradition of orlimar regarding this Master Master

00:49:58--> 00:49:59

is reading while wearing gloves. A lot

00:50:06--> 00:50:10

There is no prohibition

00:50:11--> 00:50:16

from the Prophet Muhammad wa salam, for a woman from reading the Quran.

00:50:18--> 00:50:19

In the state of

00:50:21--> 00:50:24

or for men to read the Quran, in any state,

00:50:25--> 00:50:26

there is no prohibition

00:50:29--> 00:50:52

is not proceeded. All we have is a statement of the Salah, used to recite the Quran under all conditions except when he was in a state of jenama. addicts after having sexual intercourse when it was necessary for him to take a bath. This is the basis. This is a foundation on which from which all of these different opinions and drive.

00:50:54--> 00:51:00

So some scholars made a comparison between the state of Geneva

00:51:01--> 00:51:19

would that have meant but of course, they're not the same. Because the fifth of July but you can remove by the Washington stuff. Taking about your state is over, you can now read I mean, words next statement is a woman cannot just watch yourself and go and read. She is still in that statement.

00:51:20--> 00:51:27

So the issue of reading the Quran, it is most authentic, that she is allowed to read the Quran.

00:51:28--> 00:51:29

It is preferable

00:51:31--> 00:51:37

in the case of Geneva, particularly for the mail, that they don't since this was the normal practice of

00:51:39--> 00:51:43

however, it is allowable. If a man is in a state of Geneva

00:51:45--> 00:51:52

felt a desire to meet them versus this is alone, we say it is not preferable. There is more reward in following the way of the profit

00:51:54--> 00:51:56

even though it was not commanded.

00:51:59--> 00:51:59

So

00:52:03--> 00:52:11

the most authentic position really concerning recitation in a time of medicine, is that is permissible.

00:52:13--> 00:52:15

But perhaps not recommended.

00:52:17--> 00:52:21

In terms of reading, because what we're talking about here is reading the Koran,

00:52:22--> 00:52:31

where one is touching the hand with one hand reciting the Quran, which I wish I was really referring to reciting the Quran, in a state of

00:52:32--> 00:52:38

someone's memory, this is the area where it's, I don't think there really is evidence to prove it to the soul.

00:52:39--> 00:52:49

However, in the case of touching the Quran, now, you come to the issue of touching the ground when not being in the state of Florida. And we know that

00:52:50--> 00:52:55

the general hygienists do indicate that this is not permissible.

00:52:57--> 00:53:24

Some scholars have made allowances in case of for educational means, what you will find in some schools that the woman may have stick with, you know, with rubber at the end or whatever, and to the point that which can turn the pages without her directly touching it. But she's still reading the Quran. So in that case, if a stick is allowed, in other words, that you're not directly touching the ground, then it would appear that gloves would also be allowed to do this. But

00:53:25--> 00:53:51

if we are dealing, assuming this person was asking the question is a person of an English background English speaking background if we're dealing now with a translation of a translation of the meanings of a crime, and all this is of no importance at all? Because translations of the Quran are not considered to be crime. So so you know, whatever state you're in, you can you can pick it up, you can read it, you can touch it, there's no problem at all. Because

00:53:53--> 00:54:06

the Quran that we have, even if there's advocates there to it is still not considered for harm the general the general position which is held in determining what is considered quiet and what is not, is that whenever the words of other than a law

00:54:07--> 00:54:14

in a given text is more than the words of a law, that text is no longer considered quant

00:54:15--> 00:54:22

because quant refers to a single verse, we take a verse of crime by itself. This is called a crime. But it's there comes along with this verse.

00:54:24--> 00:54:36

Other words, you know, you've given an explanation of it, which is more than what constitutes the verse, then this is no longer considered fun. This is why this is reduced from the fact that departments after them send

00:54:38--> 00:54:43

messages to the kings of Byzantium and Persia Fetzer which had loads of Aquinas

00:54:44--> 00:54:50

and he knew full well that these people are going to be in a state of Janabi their coffers, and they will probably tear it up, maybe step on it or whatever.

00:54:52--> 00:54:57

So we know that this is permissible once the words of Allah

00:54:58--> 00:54:59

are drowned, out

00:55:00--> 00:55:13

By the words of other than the law, which is the case of the transitions and decline, in such cases, these are not considered to be acquired. And as such, it's perfectly allowable for me to read it under any state, any man also.

00:55:14--> 00:55:23

The next question where my knee I find the Hadith which refuses or which does not, which prohibits slapping

00:55:24--> 00:55:25

on a woman's face

00:55:26--> 00:55:31

of children and animals, well, actually, in preparing

00:55:34--> 00:55:36

for this talk, I

00:55:37--> 00:55:41

did not dig up the ones which has to do with animals.

00:55:42--> 00:55:50

But the one which is the general One should not strike you know, even an animal in the safe. But the one concerning hitting a woman in the face.

00:55:52--> 00:55:54

This can be found

00:55:56--> 00:55:57

in

00:55:58--> 00:56:12

Abu Dawood, and imagine in a book called Al hubbies, volume one page 211 to 12, at least number 63. It's reported by Mahalia, hacking, and in Wailea.

00:56:17--> 00:56:24

The other Hadoop if the person really wants it, I have it at home, I just didn't get a chance to add it to my footnotes.

00:56:26--> 00:56:33

Stay where they want, they can contact me to their husbands or whatever, and I can send the hobbies for them afterwards.

00:56:54--> 00:57:11

Got a question is the use of Omicron effects to acquire Nakamura just explained already, this is not considered to be crime. In and of itself. It is a translation of the meanings of grammar. We call like past year attempts here of acquiring English.

00:57:22--> 00:57:25

There's a question, it says,

00:57:26--> 00:57:28

in reference to the last question.

00:57:30--> 00:57:42

Yes, but what is the husband's responsibility to help the wife with her family? I guess this must have been in relationship to what are the husbands and wives responsibility to the wives of the parents.

00:57:44--> 00:57:56

It is the duty of the husband to help his wife with her family. I mean, this is a part that these people have become a part of his family, by marriage to her. I mean, it is

00:57:57--> 00:58:39

not the direct family, but he's a part of his family now. So he has an obligation to try to convey Islam to them, and to help her to convey them to them. He shouldn't just say, well, they're your family, that your business is your problem. He should help you she needs the materials you need to take, or, you know, if she's going to visit them, if she if he's with her in the States, whenever he's going to visit them. She's going to visit them this you know, he should go and try to help to convey to them because, you know, as I said, where if that were one treatment of them in a good fashion, may bring them around, if the husband is not there trying to show that good side and to

00:58:39--> 00:58:54

treat them in a good fashion, then, you know, how can we expect them to come around? How can we expect them to see the superiority of Islam, you know, which we're in, you know, people are treated in the best of manners, you know, even though they themselves may be acting in

00:58:56--> 00:58:57

unacceptable fashion.

00:59:11--> 00:59:18

Or this is the seems to be a lack of questions. So, some of you will not stop here. No.

00:59:23--> 00:59:28

No, okay, I guess so. Some brothers are here would like to ask some questions. You're welcome. Awesome.

00:59:43--> 00:59:45

Recently, I read

00:59:46--> 00:59:47

two brothers who have more than

00:59:50--> 00:59:52

he was showing favoritism to one

00:59:54--> 00:59:55

over and above the other

01:00:00--> 01:00:03

question that was laid to me was what to do in a situation?

01:00:07--> 01:00:08

situation

01:00:13--> 01:00:15

or an assistant who is being neglected?

01:00:17--> 01:00:28

Well, I mean, what one would have to do in a situation, I mean, we know that it is the duty of the husband, to treat both wives equally equitably.

01:00:29--> 01:00:37

And if he does not fulfill this, you know, he said that he would come on the Day of Judgment with one side of his body, you know,

01:00:39--> 01:00:42

that it is a crime, and he wouldn't be punished for it.

01:00:46--> 01:00:48

However, in a marriage,

01:00:50--> 01:00:56

because you don't even have to look at a tool of marriage in the case of a single marriage, if your husband is neglecting his wife.

01:00:57--> 01:01:02

You know, he's not the only one maybe busy out doing many, many different things one machine,

01:01:04--> 01:01:07

the same row and ultimately, I mean,

01:01:08--> 01:01:35

she should strive to inform him of neglect and the need for you know, giving her more time or whatever. And if he fails to respond, then she has to look at the relationship herself, you know, and make a an assessment of the relationship. If she finds that relationship is a burden for her life has become