Ammar Alshukry – The Power of Apology

Ammar Alshukry
Share Page

AI: Summary ©

The history and context of apologizing for mistakes in Islam are discussed, including the importance of taking responsibility and acknowledging one's mistake. The difficulty of apologizing for past mistakes and the importance of forgiveness are also emphasized. The speakers emphasize the need for acceptance of apologizations and finding one's own weaknesses, as well as avoiding mistakes and making mistakes. The segment ends with a brief advertisement for a YouTube channel.

AI: Summary ©

00:00:00 --> 00:00:39
			In Al Hamdulillah nama to whom minister in whom I still feel when older bIllahi min sure all the
unforeseen our men say Dr. Molina Mejia de la who for Ramadan and Allah Who am I up for LA hottie
Allah? Why should you Allah Allah Allah Allah Allah hola Chica who eyeshadow anna Muhammad Abdul
rasool Allah automobile Salam who rebelled Allah, Allah azza wa jal Kitab in Kenema de Rosa bIllahi
min ash shaytani R Rajim yeah you had the the enamel top Allah HEPA Takata whether to move to Nila
went to the moon Wakata Tada Johan NASA Takakura Baku malaria ha ha ha ha ha ha la commune Huzzah.
Jaha well that's I mean homage and Catherine when is the taco Allah led me to set and whenever he
		
00:00:39 --> 00:01:13
			went on hub in hola que la cumbre Viva la cara Tara, you heard that the anomala Takala how puluh
covenant said either your Slocombe Armada como la cama de novo mama de la hora Sula, who forgot the
first the hose and our Lima and my bad appraisers due to Allah we seek His guidance and his
forgiveness and we seek refuge and Allah from the evil of ourselves, and the whispering of our
desires whom Allah guides no one can misguide. And whom he allows to be misled, no one can guide and
I've ever witnessed that there is nothing worthy of worship except Allah alone, having no partners
and that Muhammad Sallallahu it who ascended him as a slave and His Messenger, and his perfect
		
00:01:13 --> 00:01:15
			worshiper, asked to proceed.
		
00:01:16 --> 00:01:18
			How to leave me belta
		
00:01:19 --> 00:01:25
			was a companion of Rasulullah sallallahu, this and in Medina, who
		
00:01:26 --> 00:01:35
			became aware that the Prophet sallallahu sallam was preparing the army to proceed to Mecca for the
great conquest,
		
00:01:36 --> 00:01:38
			and how they wrote a letter
		
00:01:40 --> 00:01:47
			to communicate to his family that was in Mecca, about the arrival of the army.
		
00:01:48 --> 00:02:04
			And this is a very dangerous act. In fact, it's an act of treason, that you're giving the enemy
information and so Gibreel came and told the prophet Sallallahu to send them of the letter, the
Prophet sallallahu Sallam then sent I leave never thought of and as Zubaydah milawa
		
00:02:05 --> 00:02:07
			to go and intercept the letter,
		
00:02:08 --> 00:02:43
			and they left Medina, Hamilton had sent the letter with a woman. And when they caught up to the
woman, they asked her or they demanded rather the letter, the woman said, what letter I don't have a
letter. And they said, eventually, after she kept denying the letter, I believe nobody thought about
the law and who he said, listen, we're not lying. And we definitely haven't been lied to. And so
you're going to hand over the letter, or we're going to find it on you. And so the lady pulled out
the letter from her rates.
		
00:02:44 --> 00:03:04
			And it was then taken back to the SU la Salado syndrome, the Prophet sallallahu wasallam, called How
to be a new belta. And he said, Oh, how Maha Malacca Allah Harada what caused you to do this? What
caused you to commit this act? And remember even how tabula and who said, O Messenger of Allah,
		
00:03:05 --> 00:03:08
			he's got no excuse, just allow me to take care of this guy.
		
00:03:10 --> 00:03:18
			How to Set O Messenger of Allah, I did not do this out of disbelief and Allah and His messenger. But
		
00:03:19 --> 00:03:35
			my family has no protection in Makkah. And so I wanted them to at least be prepared. I wanted them
to be aware, so that they could make their considerations. Everyone else has family, everyone else
has tribes, everyone else has protection.
		
00:03:36 --> 00:03:44
			But how's my family going to be okay? And so when no model the lion who responded with what he
responded to the province that Elijah sent them told them that he said, Oh,
		
00:03:45 --> 00:04:26
			you do not know Perhaps Allah subhanaw taala glanced at the people of burden and how terrible is one
of the people who participated in the Battle of better and said, Emmanuel, Masha, don't forget to do
whatever you wish the people have better. I have forgiven you, that the people have budgeted they're
standing with Allah subhanaw taala is so great, that act of worship, that participation, that it
absorbs whatever the mistakes they made for the rest of their life, but how to read the law and who
in that moment, had made an apology to Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he had provided His
excuse. And so today I wanted to speak quickly and briefly about this notion of apologizing. The
		
00:04:26 --> 00:04:59
			Prophet sallallahu sending them he says in a very profound Hadith, he says mechanic in the home of
mama Tolyatti him in the home in shade failure to Halal human will earn whoever has an offense that
he has committed against his brother. Whether it is in their honor their dignity or in anything
else. The let them seek to resolve it now. And yo, Kabul ally Hakuna dinar Well, I did. He says let
them do it today. Before
		
00:05:00 --> 00:05:27
			tomorrow where there is going to be no currency other than good deeds. On the Day of Judgment,
everybody will come to collect from everybody who's harmed them, everyone who's offended to them,
and the only currency that will exist on the Day of Judgment is deeds. And so Rasulullah sallallahu
Sallam is telling us that whoever has an issue, whoever has committed an offense against their
brother or sister, resolve it now, resolve it now. At some point,
		
00:05:28 --> 00:06:07
			we became an ummah that doesn't apologize. At some point. Parents don't apologize to their children,
spouses, don't apologize to each other bosses don't apologize to their employees and leaders of
communities or even nations don't apologize to their flock. And we have to be people who take
responsibility in ourselves. It's easy to complain about, you know, how people disregard their
responsibilities over in the Muslim world, their lack of responsibility, being distant and
dismissive, but who will take responsibility for the cause that we cause in our circles of influence
in our personal lives, the negligence that we have for each other or the lack of trustworthiness
		
00:06:07 --> 00:06:45
			that we have for each other? It starts with us, it always starts with us, every verse of the Quran
was revealed for you. Every single verse of the Quran was revealed for me individually before it
being revealed to anyone else. And so when we're talking about this notion of apologizing, the first
is that when I commit a mistake, well, the first is to believe that I commit mistakes. There is none
of us who is perfect. You see people who walk around with teacher T shirts that say, to save time,
let's just assume that I'm always right. And some people actually carry themselves like they believe
that they're always right. They're never wrong. You've known that person for 25 years, 30 years,
		
00:06:46 --> 00:07:11
			they might be your spouse or your sibling or, and they have never ever been wrong. But the province
from Allah Allah has sent him he says, Kulu Benny Adam football, while Jota in a toe baboon, the
Prophet sallallahu de Sena tells us that every son of Adam is a sinner, everybody makes mistakes.
And the best of those who make mistakes are those who repent. And so the reality is, is that
nobody's perfect.
		
00:07:13 --> 00:07:15
			And as much as we may like to perceive it,
		
00:07:16 --> 00:07:54
			we make mistakes. But the best of those who make mistakes are those who when they make mistakes,
they're able to acknowledge their mistakes. And when it comes to the context of Allah subhanaw taala
they repent to Allah and when it comes to the context of individuals that they're able to rectify it
with those individuals, Allah subhanaw taala when it comes to himself, he says fully everybody
Alladhina Astra for other unforeseen hypnotic Natoma Rahmatullah in the Lucha through through
Virginia. Allah says when it comes to himself, great news, amazing news. Allah says, never despair
from the mercy of Allah, those who have wronged themselves never despair from the mercy of Allah.
		
00:07:54 --> 00:08:02
			Verily, Allah forgives all sins, every sin that you and I have ever committed, or will ever commit
Allah subhanho wa Taala is capable of forgiving it.
		
00:08:04 --> 00:08:14
			As long as you approach him, as long as you repentant to him, as long as you commit to resolving
your affair making yourself better as long as you fulfill the pillars of repentance that are known.
		
00:08:15 --> 00:08:28
			But why is apologizing so difficult? Why is apologizing so difficult? At the core, at the core, is a
truth that we don't want to face. And
		
00:08:29 --> 00:08:48
			it's mentioned that there are two types of people who have a really difficult time with apology.
Number one is the one who feels self pride. The one who feels false pride. It's when you think more
of yourself than you are, the universe revolves around you anything good that happens is because of
you.
		
00:08:49 --> 00:08:58
			And anything that happens that's bad is not because of you can't be because of you how and you're so
amazing that false pride. But the second and this is actually very
		
00:09:00 --> 00:09:09
			telling, interesting, shocking, even that person who never apologizes, and you you assume that it's
false pride, it could actually be because of self doubt,
		
00:09:10 --> 00:09:25
			self doubt, that person who thinks less of themselves than they are, because then that your emphasis
is on protecting yourself. Your self worth becomes attached to people's validation. And so when I
		
00:09:26 --> 00:09:46
			assume responsibility, or when I say that I'm wrong, or when I acknowledge that I've made a mistake,
then I have acknowledged imperfection and that imperfection makes me uncomfortable. Because it then
becomes a * in my armor, it becomes something that I feel people might think of me as less than
but if my
		
00:09:48 --> 00:10:00
			self love and validation is independent of how people think, then I would be comfortable saying or I
would be more comfortable saying I fell short. I'm a human being. My value is not attached to the
		
00:10:00 --> 00:10:08
			his particular mistake, my self worth is not attached to how someone may perceive me no matter how
they may perceive me because of this. And so an apology.
		
00:10:10 --> 00:10:53
			You know, it begins with it begins with surrender and ends with integrity, that integrity of self.
The danger of waiting to apologize, of course is that the longer a person waits to apologize, the
sooner they're their weaknesses perceived as actual wickedness. We all make mistakes, and we all
fall short of perfection. But what can make us seem evil in the eyes of others is the belief that if
we can't be truthful about this incident, if I'm obviously wrong, and I can't admit it, then I might
lie about other things. Also, I can't have the ability to actually trust your version of events. I
can't trust your statements, but too many people apologizing is perceived as weakness rather than a
		
00:10:53 --> 00:11:26
			strength. What is honesty honesty is telling the truth to ourselves and others and integrity is
living that truth. Living that truth, that comfort you see what the Sahaba of the Alana whom their
willingness, even in the heat of a moment, famously Abu Bakr and Omar got into a dispute and Omar
leaves and he goes into his house feels bad. And so he goes to find a boo buck, he goes to a Woobox
house Abu Bakr isn't there a Baba Chris with Rasulullah sallallahu wasallam but I'm gonna have to
apologize that
		
00:11:27 --> 00:11:46
			he had went to apologize and then when he goes, he finds Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi salam, even
more angry at Roma just because he had offended Oba even though Abu Bakr was the one Abu Bakr said I
was the one who made the mistake. But that notion of trying to resolve issues the prophets of Allah
do is setting them says that our actions are lifted on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
		
00:11:47 --> 00:12:14
			They are lifted except for two people who have a conflict between them. And it is said, relieve
these two leave these two until they reconcile but that reconciliation has to start somewhere. That
reconciliation has to start somewhere now. Of course, does that mean that every apology but also
part of that is accepting apologies as well? Accepting apologies Allah Subhana Allah to Allah he
says
		
00:12:15 --> 00:12:46
			well yeah for less for who Allah to Borneo fit hola hola como la homophone Rahim let them forgive
and overlook Do you not wish that Allah Subhana Allah overlook your faults as well? And so part of
it is not just learning as far as developing a culture of apology is not just learning to apologize
but learning to accept people's Apology of course the question that comes with that all the time,
because Allah says let them forgiven overlooked Do you not wish that Allah subhanaw taala forgive
you the question that comes with that is does that mean that I have to accept people's apologize
apologies even when they've I'm not sure whether they actually mean it even though they may be
		
00:12:46 --> 00:13:19
			insincere even though they are always relapsing, even though even though even though the prophets of
Allah do send them he says that the believer is in bit from the same hole twice. And the province
Allah Allah, they send them showed us some oncology's that aren't accepted. Abu Aza was a man from
the machine again, who participated in the Battle of budget against the province of allied and
sending them and he was captured and the province cellulitis and him gave him general amnesty. He
freed him, he doesn't need to ransom himself, nothing is free ago, on the condition that he does not
fight against the province of allied so again,
		
00:13:20 --> 00:13:58
			guess what? After the Battle of hurt, there is a plaza, again in the enemy camp. And this time he
says, oh, messenger of Allah leave me for my children, my family. And so the province that Elijah
send him said, I'm not going to let you I'm not going to let you twist your moustache in Makkah
saying Hi, Dr. Mohamed Marathi in that I I tricked Muhammad salallahu Salam twice. The province of
Elijah sent him on the second time they didn't accept it. And he said the believer is not stung from
the same hole twice. That does not mean that I don't forgive individuals when they harm me, but that
I don't put them in the same position to be able to harm me again. I learned from my mistakes
		
00:13:58 --> 00:14:09
			forgiveness is one thing love and accommodation and closeness and proximity and access and all of
these things is something different a code of mathematical structure Allah they were looking for
stuff you know in novel of what Rahim?
		
00:14:16 --> 00:14:50
			hamdulillah salatu salam ala Rasulillah Allah I just saw this interesting with Yara and you see that
Allah in the seal of the prophets of Allah, they send them over them to have Bob when he met the
killer of his brothers aids and Amata loves aids very much. And this man had accepted Islam after he
had killed eight. He said, I'm gonna say that to him. I asked you by Alana, I'm gonna study for he
said, did you kill my brother's eight? And the man said yes. And then model the law and he said,
then stay away from me. Because I'm never going to love you as long as the Earth doesn't love blood.
We're never going to mix and so the man said, Oh, I middle meaning is your lack of love for me is
		
00:14:50 --> 00:14:59
			going to stop me from receiving my rights as a Muslim. He said no, your rights are one thing and my
love for you is something different. And he said okay, that's fine. The
		
00:15:00 --> 00:15:08
			Prophet sallallahu wasallam accepted the Islam of last year, but he told him he said, Can you just
stay away from me because he had killed his uncle Hamza,
		
00:15:10 --> 00:15:35
			that forgiveness can be independent of again, all of that love. Be the only one who loves perfectly
after sins is Allah subhanaw taala no matter how great the sin and that's why that pairing is so
beautiful when Allah says will who will have a foothold will do it. He is the forgiving and he is
the loving meaning no matter what a person does, Allah may forgive them and Allah subhana wa Tada
may love them perfectly. Finally,
		
00:15:36 --> 00:15:47
			what are some things that can be done as far as languages of apology languages of apology? Number
one, of course the the greatest act is repentance to Allah subhanaw taala
		
00:15:49 --> 00:15:58
			repentance that's done to Allah Subhana Allah that is the greatest form of apology. But number two
with regards to others, human beings that you begin with those who are closest to your family, those
that are
		
00:16:01 --> 00:16:24
			those who are you are most intimate with, there will always be more need for apology to because
those are the ones who you interact with in the most deep and passionate level your family,
relatives, neighbors, people who've wronged settle your business before you settle with them on the
Day of Judgment. And when you look in the languages of apology of them is for example, compensation.
		
00:16:26 --> 00:16:27
			Imam Malik
		
00:16:28 --> 00:17:06
			had a young man come to him named fisherman Amar. And this man's father had sold his house to come
and study with Imam Malik. And this unfortunately, this young man just didn't have any sort of
manners at all. He didn't understand any of the protocol of the mathematics. Halaqaat. So sky comes
he's so excited. In my mind access to him. Okay. You read, and I'll correct you if there's any
problems and he says no, you read. He says to him, America says you read. Mr. Malik says no, that's
not how it goes around here. You read? And he says no, no, you read. Mathematics says you read he
says no, no, you read, say mathematics says you know what? Go have this guy taught.
		
00:17:09 --> 00:17:12
			And so he was taken and he was lashed. He starts to cry.
		
00:17:14 --> 00:17:26
			In mathematics as you're seeking Hadith, and you cry, and he said, I'm not crying because of the the
discipline. I'm crying because my father sold his house to teach me Hadith. And
		
00:17:27 --> 00:17:34
			I haven't learned Hadith I've just gotten disciplined. And so Imam Malik said, Okay, then, let me
resolve this for you.
		
00:17:36 --> 00:18:18
			Forgive me, he says, No, I'm not I'm not going to, until for every lash, you teach me a hadith for
every lash that I received. And so in my mind, it narrated him privately to this tourists to
compensate him, right, so figuring out how to resolve with individuals. And then he showed me he
said, If this is what I get for lashes, then give me more lashes so I can get more Hadith. But the
point here is the compensation with others and for for many, it is a change in behavior. That
apology be communicated by changing behavior. And that's one of the pillars of Toba as well that you
can say you're sorry, as much as you want, but that you show that you're sorry, by changing the
		
00:18:18 --> 00:18:45
			behavior that caused the apology in the first place. We ask Allah subhana wa Tada to allow us to
hear the speech and follow the best of it. We ask Allah subhana dies to accept from us our actions,
to forgive us our sins to forgive us our shortcomings that Allah Subhana Allah grant us actions that
will lead us to Paradise from speech and from actions and we ask Allah Subhana Allah to make the
best of our days our last days and the best of our moments the day that we meet him. Aloha My name
is Erica Jenna Makabe humming whatever the becoming another macro video and putting Mohamed olam at
info center Taqwa pyramids, aka Antonio hom Hola.
		
00:18:47 --> 00:18:59
			Hola, hamara Maccabiah Helene and Mr. Dafina Magoo. BNF equally makan. Muhammad Hamilton Hamilton
Muslimeen wash remodel. Don Omar Muslimeen Rob Durham hamaca Melbourne. So the Rasul Allah this is
going to Muhammad Camila theological Allah