Ammar Alshukry – The Guide To Wisdoms #3
AI: Summary ©
The importance of smile as a way to express one's love for someone is discussed in a series of conversations. The speakers emphasize the need for gentle behavior and caring for others' health. They also discuss the importance of avoiding regret and outrage, and the need for everyone to be aware of their own actions. The speakers stress the need for everyone to be aware of their own actions and not give up on their own success and privacy.
AI: Summary ©
hamdulillah salam ala Rasulillah let's begin. Go ahead
Smilla rahmanir rahim. bilingually for Rahima Hola.
coonara en be Shri in El Hawa him to who saw him for to La beach short
while rafiqul with coffee Kulu refer them in demography to me as mu.
So he begins by saying and have a countenance that is welcoming for the best have joy on their faces like a headline on a page, and accompany gentleness and all affairs, for it has never been the cause of regret or outrage, have a countenance that is welcoming, have vicious, vicious when a person sees you, and you are cheerful in their presence, when a person sees you, and you make them feel warm and welcome. And when you do that, you bring happiness to them. And Rasulullah sallallahu Sallam says in Muslim law to run them in Alma Rafi che, he says do not belittle any good that you can do. Even if you simply meet your brother, with wedge hint talc with a face that is joyous. That is a sadaqa that
you give Rasulullah sallallahu they send themselves to a sumo coffee, which I think sadaqa and I think we've all experienced moments where you've met somebody, and they were so happy to see you that it made you feel good. And then you can have the opposite, where you might be excited to meet somebody. And then when you go to meet them, they give you such a luke warm greeting, that it sucks out your energy and it sucks out your your your happiness even. And so the province, the province that Lola de Center says Don't belittle any good deeds that you can do, even if it's just that you meet a person, and you meet a person with a good, a good a good energy, you meet them with
happiness. And I've seen some people who are enamored by people they are, whether they were diplomats, or whether they were people who are just very, very popular for many different reasons. And some of them were just masters at making you feel welcomed and making you feel loved. And so when the province that Elijah said,
is so warm to Alberta than us that I'm living in the US, he's like, Rasul Allah must love me more than anybody else. Like look at the way he greets me look at the way he talks to me look at the way he smiles at me. And so I'm gonna I'm gonna ask became certain that Rasulullah cellulitis and and loved him more than anybody else. I'm amazed at how how much cheerfulness and how much happiness and how much warmth, the province level of lightness and I must have been communicating timeframes to feel that way. So I'm, even though he's a shrewd politician, like he's not somebody who is, who is who is the who is who's deceived by people's faces. I'm always convinced. And he says, I just want
everybody else to know. So he comes to the province, the lady said, I'm in front of everybody, and he says, The Ayatollah, who's the most beloved person to you, and Rasulullah Leidos, and them says, Aisha, and I'm gonna goes, hold on a second. No, no, that's not who I'm talking about. The men, the men. I want everybody to know, like, who's the most? Because it's obviously him. And the province little lady I sent him says her father,
I then he goes, and then and then who he goes, and then Omar.
And then I was like, okay, hold on a second, I obviously misread this whole situation. Let me just backtrack from this. But that is how much the province of allied is send them showcase. And, and when you meet people like that, it's really a beautiful experience. They make you feel so beloved, and make you feel so warm. And the secret to that is a smile. The secret to that is a smile. My question for you is do you like your smile? And even if you don't like your smile, people like your smile. Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi salam said that it's a charity that you give. And so practicing that smile, because it's something that you give to other people. And I'm sure you all
even before that Rasulullah sallallahu de send them that smile, that denotes warmth, cracks through even the hardest exteriors. There's nobody here who's tougher than hiding. Similarly, there will be a lion who he is safe Allahumma saloon. He is the unsheath sort of God he was a warrior par excellence. He never lost the battle in his life, and he participated in over 100 of them. So if there's anybody who's a man's man who's as tough as they come it's clearly a little the line and yet hide it says that when he accepted Islam
And He came to Medina his brother was already he told him the province that Allah is set it up has heard of your arrival he's overjoyed and he's waiting for you. And so hard it has to go right away to meet him cellulitis and limb and he does.
And he says, the memory that stayed with him is he said Fela model I remember it when he saw me from a distance the province of Elijah and sending them Tibet, some of you which he, he smiled at me, for Wallah, he let me as I move Testament had to have to be in a day by Allah, that smile of his was unbroken until I stood in front of him, like from a distance, so I sort of lost a little light I sent him his smiling height, he's beaming at him. And he says, That smile was unbroken until I stood and I was in front of him. When you smile at a person, a smile that denotes warmth and comfort and safety and security and love, then it becomes a charity that you give. So then he says,
he says, and what does he say? He says, Hold on, he says and accompany gentleness and all affairs for has never been the cause of regret or outrage. You want to be the one
thing to live off equal move the Ferlin yonder more often to Lm Yes, mum who is
so a company gentleness and all affairs because a person who is gentle never regrets their gentleness. And a person who is gentle has never criticized for their gentleness. So as far as a times where a person has regretted gentleness versus regretted, being aggressive, or being harsh, undoubtedly a person who will regret being harsh way more than the amount of times that they'll regret gentleness, and
the Prophet sallallahu Sallam he says, A Rahama, your hammer home Rama. Those who are merciful will experience mercy from Allah have mercy on those on earth, the one who is in the heavens will have mercy on you. And the province of the light as Adam said, gentleness is never added to anything except that it beautifies it. And it is never taken away from anything except that it uglify as it makes it hideous makes it disfigured. And so adding gentleness and challenge yourself to gentle to be gentle. And when are you required to be gentle when you're calm and cool and collected, or when you're upset. Of course, if it was when you're calm and cool and collected, then we'd all we'd all
pass that that's no big deal. It's easy to do that. But when when you're upset, that's when it's time for you to be gentle. And when you have the ability to extract vengeance, that's when it's time for you to be gentle. And when you can really hurt this person. And when you can really, when you can really abuse this person, this person is younger than you this person is smaller than you this person is weaker than you this person is whatever it is, you can take advantage of this person and that's when it's time for you to be gentle. And a person won't and Charlotte to either regret that gentleness.
I remember once in my own life, there was
a person who was very close to my family, like one of those that you grew up with type of things and I had a lot of rapport with them younger than me and all of that type of stuff and and it ended up being a situation where he was addicted to something that was causing his mother to lose 1000s of dollars
every month.
I was like, when by the time this came to me I was furious. I know his mom very well.
I know him very well it's just a completely like
indefensible situation.
And so I'm rushing to make this phone call to this person. And I'm gonna
let them have it.
That type of Big Brother energy that's what I'm coming with.
But then I remember that hadith, ammonia, Rama, Rama that hammelmann fill up their Himachal Memphis Sama, have mercy on those who are on earth, the one who's in the heavens will have mercy on you a lot of times we we don't look at each other through the lens of mercy. So when people are messing up in life, we don't look at them through a lens of mercy, we look at through a lens of criticism. And then when we mess up, we want everybody to look at us through a lens of mercy. And so is is that anybody's objective? Is anybody's objective in life to take 1000s of dollars from their mom's purse? Absolutely not. Nobody starts off like that everybody hopes and Charlotte, that they're going to be
an asset to their parents, they're not going to be a liability. And so instead, I called him and my tone was completely different than what I was initially intending. It was all having a lot like, care and concern, like what's going on with you? Like, are you okay? Like, the most important thing is for you to be okay. And then the money will, the money will come, we'll figure that out.
And so after we were able to get him help, you know, he sent me a text and he said, I just want to thank you for this
The way that you approached me more than the fact that you approached me, you didn't come with fire, but you came with with care that ended up allowing us to better the situation and Hamdulillah he got better. The idea here is that the importance of kindness and everything,
and how kindness beautifies everything, kindness, beautifies everything. And so looking to add that into your interactions with everybody that you do, yes, keep going.
Well, one, husband Jumla, who called Acun, sell home co had moved Alma Eboni.
So he says, Don't be distracted or don't be deluded by success that comes from foolishness. So the opposite of riff, this idea of harshness, hook, this idea of ignorance. So a person might point to it and be like, Nah, but it works. Like I'm harsh to my family. And they respect me I'm harsh to my family and they make things happen I walk in the door and nobody's there no problems, because I come with that with that energy that fire. Yeah, okay. Don't be diluted by that. He says, because at the end of the day, it's destruction. You take you know, there are many places in the, in the Muslim world, for example, where children are beat to learn the Quran.
How successful is that? As far as making kids love the Quran, though? Yeah, you might be able to pump out a foul, you can fundraise with that and but don't we all know stories of kids who have memorized the Quran from cover to cover and they're the furthest thing away? And I'm not even talking about the people who completed half how many are the kids in the Muslim world who are traumatized by their health experience by going to schools and by going to these programs, and that's why it's so beautiful that a scholar was asked should we be kids this was on rocket scholar, he was asked should we beat kids to teach them the Quran? And he said Allah Subhana Allah said or
Ramana Allah Quran and he didn't say Jabara Allah Quran. Allah says, A Rahman, the Merciful is the one who taught the Quran and he didn't say the Jabbar. And so when you see the province of Elijah said of who's the greatest builder?
Was he someone who who his success was based on ignorance? Or was it based on the opposite incredible, this incredible gentleness, the province of Elijah and some stories of gentleness are amazing, even when people would, it's human nature and we're going to get to that you have to realize that human beings are going to be human beings, they're going to be different. I'll give you an example famous example as the linings at the house of Aisha.
And it's iShares it's ISIS day, she's taking care of the province on the lights and I'm on that day and he has guests and when he has guests
one of his other wives sends a meal over
like it's a little bit of a
while like you know, if she doesn't know how to cook so let me send you guys over some let me send you guys some assistance.
And I shall be Alana, who is
the prophet is there and the guests and I should take the plate and smashes it on the ground.
Could you imagine an era of man today forget 1400 years ago, an era man today or any man from you know.
And yet also Lasala Leida Salam simply smiles that he gets and he says a volatile Macomb. Your mother got jealous. Your mother got jealous. And then he commanded for the plate to be replaced. And to be said by when you realize this is just a moment I actually didn't mean to disrespect him. I actually didn't mean to disrespect the guests. This was an emotion that came over
how you cheat your spouse how you treat children. A lot of times we're very short tempered when it comes to kids will solo again last week I told you about the proofs of Prophethood the province of license and being married to nine woman is proof of Prophethood to me, the way the province I send them taught he interacted with children. That's proof of Prophethood at Sydney medical the man who says I served the province of the lightest and and for 10 years, 10 years from the age of 10 to the age of 20.
Do you know how much you clash with a 10 year old and 11 year old a 12 year old a 13 year old a 14 year old a 15 year old.
Like you are confounded by them. There doesn't seem to be any logic to their actions. Why they do things. A lot of times you tell them to do something they do the exact opposite. They come to you with excuses. They come to you with lies. They come to you with all sorts of things. And so Anna Sydney Maddox says Rasulullah sallallahu sallam, I served him for 10 years and never once never once. Did he tell me to do something?
And I didn't do it. And he said to me, why don't you do that? Or once that I did something and he told me why did you do that?
We asked our 10 year olds why they did that like 20 times a day and NSS for 10 years I was never asked by the province cellulitis I love the province. The lighting system shows incredible gentleness all over the time and
In our author here, at Wooster, he says, that don't be deluded by any sort of success that comes from harshness, any sort of success that comes from and will guarantee because at the end of the day it is destruction and drift is that which constructs it's that which builds toward this either,
in either case, in
Berlin, do merlon.
So he says asin, if you have the ability to do so, if you have the ability to be excellent to people then do that, because you don't know if it's going to last, you don't know if it's going to last. And there are lots of examples of that. If you have an opportunity to do good, do a good deed to date, you don't know if you're going to have that opportunity tomorrow, pick an opportunity, the opportunity to be kind to your parents, how many a person is robbed of that opportunity, when they get a phone call saying that their parent passed away.
Or the day comes that a parent passes away Hello Is that door is closed, and then the other doors closed, when the other parent passes away, I had the opportunity while I'm there alive, for me to be in their service for me to be in their company, more importantly, and that don't have that opportunity after it's closed. So take advantage of it take advantage of your youth while you have your youth this is an opportunity for you to to volunteer and to gain knowledge and to study and to serve and to do all of these types of things. You have the opportunity to study under a particular scholars while those scholars are alive, while those scholars are in your city while they're
available and accessible to you. And then after they pass away or after they leave you don't have that opportunity anymore. opportunities present themselves and they're always a limited time only so take advantage of the opportunity of a lifetime within the lifetime of that opportunity. That is et but anyway
it's about taking advantage of opportunities while they're available.
For the
following years Dan will be unwell Lee Martin will be duly well. Sammy Yes.
So he says a road a road is a garden and it is beautified by flowers in bloom bill and worry.
And what is the plural of note a note is a flower. So gardens are beautified by flowers when they're in bloom. But what is a what is a a? a free man? But we said that shoulder here does it mean free man it means a noble person? What is a noble man beautified by? He's not beautified by clothes and garments and wealth and cards and things like that. That's not what beautifies a person specifically a man what beautifies a man is their character. It is their their their dignity it is there it is their attributes and it says well hotel bill actually assigning and for him he's mentioning two qualities number one is their excellence to others. And number two is their justice. That is what
beautifies a man and then he says well soon my checkup
will read that so I had no I haven't soon oh gee gala tea, real quick, Loretta Lila, who work who
will watch a new song.
And he says protect the countenance of your face don't tear it's veal. For every normal person is protective of their face. So what does that mean? That idea even in English, what will we say of saving face, save your own face? Save your own face by not asking people a lot.
Not developing the habit of always asking people, no matter how kind and gentle a person is no matter how well they like how, how kind they are.
People get exhausted by a person who's always asking.
On day one, you see this friend of yours and they say to you, Hey, can I get a ride home? You're like, sure. Day number two. They're like, Can I get a ride home? Sure. Day number three, can I get a ride home? Sure day number for it each time it's out of your way each time. It's out of your way each time. It's out of your way by day number five, you're going to park your car two blocks away. And then when they say you can get a ride however you're like, Man, I'm hoping both of us are able to get a ride home tonight.
person comes every time you see them. They're asking you for $1 It's not a lot but it's $1 just being asked $1 $1 $1 $1
of a person protects themselves from asking others.
A person may be able to put themselves in a position of such dignity that if they ever asked it makes it seem like they're the ones who are doing you a favor. I give you an example back in the day.
I used to attend the Halaqa of a friend of mine. He was a chef even though he was just a year older than us. He was a friend and a chef. You
We used to attend his halacha. It's probably like 18 years old at the time.
And he was 19. And the people that were attending the HELOC are all our ages. 2021 2223. But you know, for a 23 year old to come and attend a HELOC of a 19 year old, it's a big deal.
So we all just attend his halacha have a little Allah to Allah. And he never ever, he didn't have a car, you will take the you will take like two buses and a train to get to the class. And everybody else had cars. But he would never ever let anybody give them ride home.
And he's the one who's giving the * up. Everybody wants to give them a ride home. He's like, no, no, he's good. And every week, people be like, Yo, can we get a ride home? He's like, Nah, I'm good. And he had like some little nursery rhyme. He would say like, if your feet will get you there, then there's no need for you to get a ride or something like that. Yeah, some sort of.
But I remember one time, he asked me, he says, Do you mind giving me a ride home? I was like, of course. I'm the one doing him. I'm giving him the ride. But guess what? It was so rare. And I know that he was so particular about this. I felt like I was the one who was receiving the favor.
A person can be so dignified that even when they ask, it seems like they're the ones who are extending the favor to the ones who's receiving it. And that's the idea. So he says but that comes through incredible gardening. It comes to doing incredible gardening, and that is the nature of the noble they don't ask, you know Allah subhanaw taala says yes, Abraham Mujahid lasagna, Amina Dafoe, that there are people who a ignorant person would think that they are wealthy because of how much effort they have, how much dignity they have, they're broken, they have no money and their car's broken. And you know, they're having trouble, make rent and all that type of stuff when you ask
them. So I'm like, why are you doing like, Hamdulillah? Everything's great. How are you doing?
And you're like, I'm doing good. And they start asking about you. And they're concerned about you, is there anything I can do to help blah, blah, blah, and you have no idea that they're going through such incredible hardship,
their dignity, their effort, but what that inspires of us. And what that should require of us also, is that you are sensitive to the needs of your brother, don't ever put them in a position where they they need to ask you try to be sensitive to their needs, try to anticipate people's needs, if I hear that my brother or sister, for example, lost their job, I shouldn't wait until
two months go by or three months go by. And so he starts actually, you know, calling me to ask,
let me proceed. They're asking and see if I can be of any sort of help, right, they're going through some sort of difficulty, anticipating people's needs as best as you can. And you know, what else helps a person to do that is, again,
visiting people.
When you visit people, for the sake of Allah, you get to see people's circumstances, you get to become more aware of how people are living, you have to get to be more aware. It's an added level of vulnerability that that person is showcasing to you. You don't see that at Starbucks together, you'll never understand that you'll never be able to recognize that if you're eating at a restaurant, but when you actually visit each other for the sake of Allah, you get a deeper glimpse at people's
people's lives. Yes, sir.
Do one final con who, then when would you have been been shooting one issue Rocky? Dawn?
Give her the
solar field.
Theta LuBu fell inside? Yes, sir. been rotting.
So he says and so if you meet an enemy, meet them forever with a face with joy and cheerfulness and radiance, and leave laziness regarding any goodness, you're seeking for the lazy never get to enjoy the fruits of their work. So that cheerfulness that he was telling us about earlier. He's saying it's not just for the people that you like, but even your enemies, meet them with that cheerfulness, even with your enemies, meet them with that smile, even with your enemies, meet them with that good character. Why? Because it's as if he's, he's referring to the verse where Allah subhana data says what is it still has to LSA a the viability asset for either lubaina Cobain Hua, Hua Lian Hemi. And
so as facilite Allah Subhana Allah says that the good and the evil are not the same repel with that which is greater and if you do so, perhaps the one who between you and them is enmity may turn into a loving protector. You can win an enemy over with good character. And we see example after example. after example after example of that with the life of the province of allied SLM these companions of his many of them were enemies, and yet they had moments with the province little lighthouse and them that eventually captured their hearts or when they're looking back at all of their interactions with the province of allied ace and they see a consistency of character that that that compels them to
eventually submit.
But again that you
doesn't come with meeting fire with fire, you continue to show goodness to those who show harm to you or show enmity to you. It Fabula that he has and will repel with that which is greater. And then he says and avoid laziness. Avoid laziness, because no one is able to capture the goodness they're seeking with laziness. And laziness is something that was sort of lost the light SLM, used to seek refuge in Allah from
in the morning, he would say Allah Romania, oh, the bigger word or the became in Allah IGC. Well, Castle, this is a dua that the prophesy centum would make in his mornings, Oh Allah, I seek refuge in You from two things I just, and cousin. I just both of them are inability, but I just is an inability that comes from physical inability, I might have all of them in, in I might have all of the motivation in the world. But I just don't have the ability to do it. I want to do this, but I can't and it's not just physical inability. But it's, it's just not being able to actualize something that you want, you have the motivation, but you don't have the means or you don't have the
ability. But Castle is a mode, a lack of motivation.
It is the laziness that comes from lack of motivation. I might have the ability to do things I might have the resources to do things I might have the access to do things, but I don't have the motivation to do it. And the province of a lighter said to me is to seek refuge in Allah in the mornings from castle from laziness as if he's What do you seek refuge from you seek refuge from something that's going to harm you you seek refuge from shape, bond you seek refuge from a past, a creature a serpent that's what you seek refuge in Allah Subhana Allah from and he is seeking refuge in Allah subhanaw taala from laziness like laziness is this thing that is going to debilitate him or
something that's going to harm him and laziness does. That's what laziness does. And so nobody who's lazy enjoys the fruits of their work.
Lovely learning malroux Here Amin to come and Oza were in Alvin lat who walk on
one soon.
Manuela to the to where
he is.
So he says there's no honor for a man other than taqwa and intellect. Even if they were to be shaded and branches and leaves. So it's a play on words. It's hard to translate. But he says there's no Lin, there's no honor but little also means shade. So he says there's no honor or shade for a person other than taqwa, even if they were to be shaded and branches and leaves, so even if they're sitting in an orchard somewhere and there's shade, if they don't have the shade of taqwa, then they don't really have shade, ie honor or dignity. And then he says, and people assist those whose dunya has arrived and they're against them if that dunya subsides. So, number one, the prophet ALLAH SubhanA.
Allah data says that the daily baths of Taqwa the garment of Taqwa is the best thing that a person can wear. As much as we care about what we wear, when we go out into this world, the best thing that a person can adorn themselves with is stuck, while consciousness of God, awareness of God fear of Allah subhana data, that's the best thing that you can go out into this world with. That's number one. And then number two, he says, and this is a reality he's talking about this. 1000 years ago, he died and 401 after the Hijrah, he says people are on your side, as long as the dunya is on your side.
If the dunya is on your side, things are rolling for you right now you happen to have money. If you've got money, you've got a lot of Yes, men around you. You've got a lot of supporters around you. You got a lot of people who are who are who are are trying to if you're hot, there are a lot of people who are standing next to you trying to keep warm. But if it turns away from you, then guess what they're going to do to they're going to turn away from you.
They're going to leave you they're going to scatter. In fact, he said they might turn against you.
But what about my loyal folks, what about my rider dies? What about what happened to that? He's like, You have to understand the nature of people. That's the nature of people. If you've got wealth, then you're going to have a lot of people around you. If you don't have wealth, you're not going to have a lot of people around you. And so, understanding that nature helps you, number one not be diluted by your moments where you do have wealth, where you do have success. You don't be diluted by that. Rudy Kipling in his poem if it's an amazing poem, it's an amazing poem.
He says,
if you can
keep your wits when all about you are blaming theirs and losing if you can keep your wits when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you. If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you but make allowance for their doubting to see if you can wait and not be tired of waiting or being lied about don't deal in lies or being hated. Not give way to hate ignore look too good North talk to white
If you can dream, but not make dreams your master like dream but don't make dreams your master don't sit there and dream forever, like put it to put it to put it to work. If you can think and not make thoughts your aim if you could meet with triumph and disaster and treat both imposters just the same. That's the point here. If you can meet with triumph and disaster and treat both imposters just the same if I meet with Triumph, and even keeled, I don't let the success go to my head. And if I meet with failure, I'm also even keeled. I don't let the failure destroy me, I treat I recognize both of them to be imposters and I treat them just the same. And when I have the dunya, and things
are going well for me, and I've got people around me clapping for me and all of that type of stuff. Number one, I don't get diluted by that wealth, and I don't get diluted by their yeses. I don't get diluted by their yeses. Everyone is saying, Yeah, you shouldn't do that. Yeah, you should do that. No, I tried to find. And that's why he's going to talk next about friendship, you're going to need to you're going to need people around you who are truly sincere to you. And then number two, I don't get broken by the fact that when the dunya separates from me, that all of these people around me that I thought were right, or dies are going to leave. That's the nature of the dunya. That's the
nature of people I've seen sometimes some who got imprisoned. And when they got imprisoned, you barely saw anybody tweet about them or anything like that. And then when they came out because they were so popular when they come out hordes of people are all greeting them, or is everybody shaking their hand and kissing them and all that I'm like, Man, where was all of this love when they were in prison? That's the nature of the dunya. That's the way that it goes. That's the nature of people. Yes, sir. No mean ye the Man in Babylon? Housley, you don't want to see sir. Oh, Melissa
led to their isuma washer and your boo Ruby he
wanna
see them we still have.
So he gives, he's continuing on his point. And he says so bad. The eloquent was our wealth is like back into the dump. These are two examples in Arabic literature, who were considered to be examples in their fields that bad was an example and his eloquence. He was untouched in his eloquence and battle is an example in his inability to talk. So he says bad.
Without wealth is like backing
saben without wealth, the most eloquent guy if he's got no money, nobody wants to hear what he has to say. Or nobody can hear what he has to say. And back in if he's got money, man, everybody's listening. Everybody's listening. If not, that tells a joke. Everybody laughs because he has money in battle cries, everybody cries because he has money. I have a friend of mine. And a friend. This is a cousin of mine. I remember. We were young at the time, he was like maybe
early 20s. This was in our village in Sudan. And he had, there was a marriage that was happening. And it was happening to I think, one of his close relatives. And he was a passionate young guy. And he had an opinion on this wedding.
And he didn't want it to happen. And so he's calling one of the uncles, he's calling one of the uncles and he's like, I don't think this wedding should happen. And this and this and this and this and uncle said to him, Listen, do you have any money to help this wedding or not? And he said, he said, No, I don't have any money like in I'm participating with my opinion. He's like, keep your opinions to yourself.
Like if you don't have any money, your opinion is not free. Keep that opinion to yourself. Well, then he called and he was like, I have learned today that if you don't have money, your opinion doesn't count. Like yes, that's exactly what goes. That's the nature of human beings. Allah knows best. He says don't place your secret with someone who's loose lipped for a livestock is not shepherded in a wolf den. Don't place your secrets with someone who's loose lipped for livestock isn't shepherded in a wolves den. If a secret is is spread by you your mama Shafi says he says if you share your own secret with your own tongue, then blame someone else, then you're a fool
depicted. If your own chest was too narrow to restrain your own secret, the chest of the one you entrust is even more constricted. It's the way that it goes. So if you especially if you know that that person is the type that share secrets, you go to somebody who can't keep a secret and you're like, Listen, I've got something amazing to share with you. But you can't tell anybody. And they're sitting there jittering and they're like, Okay, you're like, bro, by the time you get up that's already on Instagram.
Or on WhatsApp somewhere. So it's it's, it's he says, Don't give it to somebody who's loose lipped. Don't give your secrets. Keep your secrets to yourself. Especially. Especially especially
See what goes on between you and your spouse
when it leaves the bedroom it gets bigger when it leaves the bedroom it gets bigger when it leaves the living room it gets bigger when it leaves your house Oh man becomes very hard for you to bring back unless it's someone who he's going to talk about and Charlotte data people have certain characteristics people who are very wise people who are very caring people who are very action oriented keep going.
Let the serbin surpass
them fella whom was easy
to see in
Morocco, Michael Luma in Florida in new de nom, la luna birding some Watson, sir.
Okay, so we'll end with this one. And we won't get to the friends in the consultation part. We'll save that for last next week in sha Allah. But he basically says don't consider all people to be of the same nature. A lot of disappointment comes from comparison. They say Comparison is the thief of joy. So some people, some people, you treat well as in it in us to establish kuruva homo, right, that's what he began with, be good to people and you will, you will enslave their hearts, guess what, there are some people who you will be the best to and you won't capture their hearts at all. In fact, they'll see your kindness as weakness, and they will criticize you in public and they won't
appreciate anything that you did. Or you might be good to them for years and years and years. And all that does, it doesn't increase them in gratitude. It only increases them in expectation. It only increases them in entitlement, don't treat or think that people's natures are all the same people are as varied as as, as the colors are, he says but what that teaches us that teaches you to be like water when it comes to people can use us to just hold the laugh Allah Subhana Allah says take what is given freely you know and take what is given freely of the of the tafseer that is just take what people give you. This person will will barely give you a thank you take that from them. This person
will give you profuse gratitude and encouragement and all of that you take that from them. But don't don't be too attached to how people respond to what you do. And don't be too attached to trying to mold people into being something that they're not recognize that there are people's divert that people are diverse. Allah Subhana Allah created them to be like that. And when you realize that then you'll be able to appreciate them for the good that they have, as opposed to trying to mold them into something that they're not. Okay. So and with that in sha Allah to Allah, Allah lightest and Mohammed Do I just have to sit and think