Ammar Alshukry – The Guide To Wisdoms #2

Ammar Alshukry
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The segment discusses the importance of protecting one's privacy and privacy through social media, avoiding advertisements, avoiding social media posts, and not being too exposed to certain areas. The speakers emphasize the need for sensitivity and privacy for family members, avoiding advertisements, and avoiding certain activities. They also stress the importance of avoiding negative behavior and working towards one's goal. The segment ends with a discussion of the concept of harvesting regret and the need for individuals to be present in the moment to avoid becoming a centers instructed.

AI: Summary ©

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			So let's begin at hamdulillah salam ala Rasulillah go ahead is here
		
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			monka
		
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			monka new Holly mana unfurling SallAllahu Ullal happy party is one of the new manager, Bill
manajemen. SOCO pivot and III will manually insert effect.
		
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			So he says, Man, can I locate him or not and Felicia who added one worker, Daniel, whoever is mana
and affair, whoever is someone who restricts hair, goodness, someone who doesn't want to give hair
and hair every time Claire has mentioned in the Quran is it means wealth.
		
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			We know it could be lady Alicia dt.
		
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			Allah subhanaw taala is talking about wealth. But here he's talking about hair, it also means
wealth. So somebody is always restrictive of their wealth. He says that that person doesn't really
have friends. They don't have, they don't have. They don't have people that they love. They don't
have loved ones. But we can say there is an extrapolate that the meaning of goodness, if a person
doesn't want to give from what they have of goodness, whether that's time or whether that's, that's
energy, or whether that's resources, or whether that's then that person really, who do you love. And
we live at a time of incredible loneliness.
		
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			It said that there's an epidemic of loneliness. The UK recently they they appointed a minister of
loneliness, people are more lonely than ever, I won't say ever before, but people are incredibly
lonely. Even though people have more friends, quote, unquote, than ever before, you know, 10,000
friends, 50,000 followers, 100,000 a million followers. But yet people are really, really lonely.
And part of the reason for that, and Allah Subhana Allah knows best is the superficiality of our
relationships. When you create or to create a real relationship, it requires a lot of it requires a
lot of sacrifice. It requires a lot of inconvenience. It requires a lot of this person coming and
		
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			spending time with me, this person coming. You know, at the beginning, when we started these plus
one sessions, a year ago, we talked so much about the importance of hosting people bringing people
into your house, even though it is incredibly inconvenient. And people don't like to do it anymore.
I'm sure many of us we remember if you look at the amount that our parents might have hosted, versus
how much we host, it's a stark, stark difference night and day. But their relationships because of
that when the person comes and spends time with you, or you go and you visit somebody, but you visit
them in your house, in their house, you don't visit them in a restaurant somewhere you don't meet
		
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			each other in some place that's outside, you get access, you get depth to that person's life, the
way that they live, their, their family, their, their their, their vulnerability gets shared, right,
it's very awkward for you to host guests. That's why Islam talks so much about the etiquettes of
visiting a guest because you've placed the host in a very vulnerable position when you go. But
		
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			if a person is not willing to sacrifice, their time, and their energy and their, their money, even
for the people that they love, then they don't really love anybody. They don't really love anybody.
So I have
		
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			something that they wrote, I wrote about inconvenience, and it goes.
		
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			People don't invite each other over any more.
		
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			Because there's a level of intimacy and vulnerability and inconvenience We don't ever want to be
inconvenience than relationships are full of inconvenience. And deep friendships where people are
committed to each other and carry each other's burdens and meet the tears of life together are
inconvenient. It's just easier to swipe left or to share that to care. It's easier to just skim on
the surface of everyone's existence. But the cost of that superficiality is depth and meaning and
love. Those things are paid by a lifetime of inconvenience and sacrifices. And those that opt out of
payments will get loneliness for free. And there's plenty of that to go around. So the idea of the
		
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			idea of
		
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			the idea of embracing and convenience because you're actually exchanging for it depth and
relationships. And Allah subhanaw taala as best you see it, keep going. Man.
		
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			Email and NASA Merlin su coffee baton elearning he will manually insert new so he says when
		
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			Whenever people spend money, people love them. Because wealth is for people. A trial. The poet said
that aid to NASA, right and NASA Padma Lu,
		
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			right to NASA Admiral Elam and endo Humala, were Mala and the Omalu for and who NASA because Murrow,
he said because mild means to incline. He says ray to NASA Moon football, Elam and endo Fila Omen
Landau fit the fact who NASA Moon for that later NASA Elam and endota have a woman law and
		
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			the idea is people are inclined to those who have wealth. You know what the word for generous is in
Arabic.
		
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			Katie,
		
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			but you know Kim actually means It means perfect.
		
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			A person was asked me said How was the Quran generous? I said, What do you mean? He said Al Quran Al
Karim. I said no Quran doesn't mean generous. Carry means perfect. Allah subhana died of being a
carry means the perfect Lord.
		
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			But the Arabs, what they did was they looked and they said, which attribute out of all of attributes
out of all of characteristics out of all of qualities makes a person look perfect. And they found
that it is
		
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			generosity. There's nothing that makes a person look perfect, like generosity. There's nothing that
makes people overlook people's faults, like generosity. If you have a husband who's generous, she'll
overlook a lot. You have parents who are generous, the kids will overlook a lot. You have a
community or a politician or a ruler who is generous, and the people will overlook a lot. He might
miss Java, he says in COSATU, because he'll Balaiah was sort of like a Hakuna has to set their visa
if you know you've got equal labor income happiness, he says if your mistakes are many amongst the
folk and you wish to make for those mistakes that cloak then conceal yourself with generosity as
		
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			hence it is said that every every vice is covered by benevolence. Okay.
		
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			Keep reading is here, man?
		
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			Yes, lemon Wawa Ely him. Whereas Xiaowen Hua body Rue La AMI just learn manca nanny Laura Gleason
*, gnarly Warden wham
		
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			FC healing. Phil Swinson on so he says man, Salomon, Nas, whoever makes peace with the people he
saved from their from their anger and their harm. And he lives amongst people in tranquillity and
happy like, if you just make peace with people, they'll leave you alone. But Allah knows best that's
really really impossible.
		
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			Even if you mind your business, there's somebody who's gonna have a problem with you.
		
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			People you know.
		
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			You know, as amazed when you see people criticize Mufti mink
		
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			as like this is like the most peaceful person in the world. He doesn't bother anybody doesn't get
any any trouble doesn't do any controversy, blah, blah. And people like I don't like him.
		
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			There's no I exactly why. There's, there's nobody, there's nobody. And again, one of the most
important quality that I personally have is resilience, that you realize, you know what, there are
going to be people who are not going to like me, it doesn't matter what I do. There's going to be
people who don't like me, there's going to be people who have a problem with something that I do.
The only way for you to have absolutely no critics in this world is for you to do absolutely
nothing. And even if you do absolutely nothing, there are going to be some people who are going to
be critical of that. So just recognize that this is the dunya This is a place of trial. This is why
		
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			we're here. And if a person the beautiful thing is that if you make your audience Allah subhanaw
taala then you only have to worry about pleasing one. But if you make your audience people then
you're going to be scattered and you're never going to be able to please them all. Yes, keep reading
		
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			smen cannula after Silvana Okay, so he says, and the one who's controlled by their intellect has not
yielded his knifes degree to be bent so the two verses together, and whoever makes people with
people, whoever makes peace with people is safe from their anger and lives with a cool like intent
and the one who is controlled by their intellect has not yielded his knifes to greed to be bent.
This idea of helps
		
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			the person who uses the word Akon literally means to tie down, it means to tie down to bind. And so
the province of the light is Selim he says in the famous Hadith, the man comes to the city of La
sala de Sena and he says, Should I tie down my camel? Or should I rely on Allah? Like should I lock
my car doors or should I rely on Allah? And the Prophet saw the light SLM? He says, Tell her what he
said rely he said bind the camera down, bind the camera down, put it
		
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			on airplane mode, because otherwise you're gonna get calls and interrupt. So he says,
		
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			tie the camel down and token and rely on Allah subhanaw taala. You have to bind the camel down and
you have to rely on Allah you have to do both. But the point here is that the intellect is called
the actual because the intellect if a person has intellect, it's supposed to bind you down. A person
who has intellect is going to be bound by that intellect. You're not going to say things without
thinking. You're not going to do things without thinking you're not going to act ignorantly because
you are bound by that intellect of yours. It's supposed to be restrictive. The hedger is also called
the hedger, the intellect, because and it's also called a room because it protects that which is
		
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			outside from going inside supposed to protect you. So the intellect is supposed to protect and it's
supposed to restrain. The intellect is supposed to restrain. And so he says, Whoever is bound by
their intellect,
		
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			has not yielded his neffs by greed to be bent. Greed is something that destroys a person's Deen.
		
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			Greed is something that destroys a person's deen the province of Elijah seldom tells us the story of
a blind man, a bald man and a leper. Have you guys heard this story before?
		
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			Yes, yes.
		
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			And excited. Yes. Yes. Blind man, bald man, leper. Skin is blemished the leper, bald guy and a blind
man.
		
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			And each one of them is visited by an angel. And the angel says to him, he comes to the the leper,
and he says to him
		
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			what's the
		
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			what is the most beloved wealth to
		
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			and he says cows, one of them says camels the other one says
		
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			the other one says she Venom goats. And the angel heals all of them. Each one of them says, you
know, my, I wish the one wish that I have from Allah subhanaw taala is that he removes for me, this
leprosy that I have through which that has made people hate me or or that any mass they, they, they
they dislike me they avoid me. They're disgusted by me. That's what it is. They're disgusted by me.
And then the bald man says the same thing. And the blind man says the same thing.
		
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			And so the angel heals all of them. By Allah subhana data's permission. This one gets his vision
back, this one skin becomes beautiful. And this one gets hair back.
		
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			Each one of them gets
		
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			wealth, sheep, camel, horse, cow. And the angel says May Allah bless this wealth that you have. And
then the angel comes back at another period of time to test each one of them. And each one of them,
the camel became many camels filling a valley, the cows became many cows, the goats became many
goats. And the angel shows up at each one of their door in the shape of their former selves. ie it
comes as a blind man to the blind man. It comes as a leper to the one who had leprosy and it comes
as a bald person to the person who was bald.
		
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			And Allah Subhana Allah knows best. Why this bald man like it's not leprosy, it's not blindness. You
know what I mean? But perhaps he had like, a shape of his head or something like that became exposed
to his baldness, Allah knows best.
		
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			You know, but at the end of the day, the angel comes and says to this man says to this man, can you
please, I'm somebody who's cut off. And I'm a leper, as you see, I've been tested by the same thing
that Allah had tested you before. Can you please give me
		
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			one camel from all of your camels. And the man says Gugu Kathira says, I've got too many, too many.
Too many needs got too many rights, too many things going on too many people who who need my help.
		
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			And he says, aren't you the person whom Allah subhanaw taala you know, healed you and Allah gave you
this and gave you that? He says me? No, that's not me.
		
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			He said, this love that I have. I got it carried on and carrier. I got this from my dad and my
grandfather like, this is this is our bloodline type thing. And he says if you're lying to me, Allah
subhanaw taala return you to how you were
		
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			another one, the same thing. The Baldwin says the exact same thing. He says if you're lying, may
Allah subhana data return your back to who you are. And then he goes to the blind man. He's a blind
man that that man can see now and he says, he says Absolutely. He says, the blind man he
		
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			says, whatever you want from my sheep, I'm not going to stop you from any of them. Take whatever you
want.
		
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			After Allah subhanaw taala, blessed me,
		
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			after Allah Subhana Allah, Allah bless me, take whatever you want.
		
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			Amen.
		
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			And then the angel said, Tim came to obviously in the form of a blind man, he says, I am from your
Lord. And I want to inform you that ALLAH SubhanA data is pleased with you, and he's become angry at
your two companions, your two friends. But this idea of covetousness person just wanting more and
more and more, there is no limit to our greed. There's no limit to our greed. If a person doesn't
check their greed and eventually say to themselves, I am content. That's why charity is so
important. You know, these minimalist movements, one of the beautiful things that I've read about
this issue of charity is that the freeing thing about charity is that you're telling yourself that
		
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			your content, when I give sadaqa, I'm telling myself, I have enough. And I'm suffocating this idea
of I need this money for this, and I need this 90 For that, because there's no limit to a person's
greed. And the scary thing, of course, is that a lot of times, not a lot of times, but sometimes a
person makes a promise to Allah subhanho data, if you give me x, then I'll do y.
		
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			And then you promise that Allah gives you that x, and then you might fulfill the Y the first year,
and then the second year, and then the third year, but then the fourth and the fifth, and the sixth,
that wise that you promised, becomes diminished.
		
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			There was a man who, very recently, he promised the last panel that if I make a million dollars, I'm
going to give 50% of it in charity 50 promise like that. So he made the million and he gave the 50.
And then the year later, he gave 40. And then the year later he gave 30, and then the gate of the
swan. So by the time my chef, you know, he was telling me the story. By the time he had interacted
with this guy, the guy told him he says, You have to be honest, I'm not even paying this guy
anymore. Allah has kept increasing me. And now I don't even pay this guy on my wealth, greed. And so
it's something to be very, very careful of the private satellite. I send them more and as I've shown
		
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			MOBA, stinginess that is obeyed and how and metabo and desires that are followed. They destroy a
person's Deen Yes, keep going is here Manmad the poor often LIFO tilde Halina Wahiawa lol happy Oh
man, well, who is
		
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			Menasha Sharon
		
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			kamin who Moon Alpha Lee and Souza who work
		
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			at whoever extends his gaze towards desires will one day upon the truth lower that gaze and chagrin
and the one who deals with people is exhausted by them because they're rotting, manifested
transgression and sin.
		
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			A person who unleashes his gaze
		
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			looking left and right and one day they're going to be lowering that gaze in truth and humiliation.
		
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			The person will unleashes their gaze
		
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			What are tips that we have tonight? On May 9 in Houston, Texas for a person to finally lower their
gaze. What do we got? We got our top 10 Tips men and women
		
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			I don't have them I'm asking you I don't have I have my thoughts but I want I want your top 10 Tips
yes mine that
		
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			log but every time you mess up you have to pray to like us
		
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			okay, that's number one was number two
		
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			What's that? Yes. Fasting that says fasting. Yes, that's number two number three
		
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			sadaqa is number three
		
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			sisters lowering gaze is not just the brothers activity.
		
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			What do y'all got?
		
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			So far? It's the five seeking forgiveness stuff and Allah stuff for the last stop on Allah stuff on
a heart number four.
		
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			They get special kind of pusher nor on there. Okay, but what's a tip to do it? So you're saying
thinking about the reward, so that when you lower your gaze, you get certain reward? For sure. And
stuff like that Ibrahim has.
		
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			be deliberate about what you look at very good. Since there's already a lot
		
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			what you say
		
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			okay, okay.
		
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			What do we have? What else do we have?
		
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			I don't think it's, by the way, so it's not that you don't look as much because
		
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			lowering gaze is lowering
		
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			is both from men and from women. Just because you're a woman doesn't mean that you don't have to
lower your gaze from the out of other women. A lot of times women don't pay attention to the issue
out of other women. And so they they're liking this girl's picture of her in a bikini. On on social
media. That's not allowed. You can't look at that stuff. Okay, yes.
		
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			Get married.
		
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			Okay, so that's number six. All of them are from the brothers. Number seven. I have one on your web
browsers you can turn off images
		
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			you can just make that a setting you just turn off the images and so you don't get all of these
random advertisements yes
		
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			lower your gaze from other people's faults but that's not what we're talking about right now but
it's very nice but yeah so many it
		
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			occupy your time with something beneficial Okay?
		
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			Ziad yes again
		
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			what is it?
		
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			The Grove ALLAH SubhanA wa Tada. Okay, so our five year old boys are answering before the sisters
have an answer? Yes
		
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			you should start avoiding
		
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			Instagram posts or places where
		
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			you avoid them altogether
		
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			You're very welcome. hamdulillah Yeah, so avoiding
		
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			Instagram posts or whatever just being sensitive to these things. Yes. Although in the back that
culto
		
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			looking more at nature.
		
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			I mean, it's quite natural to be honest.
		
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			Say mashallah, logwood all that type of stuff. Yes.
		
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			Anything else?
		
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			Read two pages of the Quran. Okay, guys, listen.
		
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			Yes.
		
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			Okay, very good. I was a biller, not just as the Father but through the biller, Yusuf Ali Salam said
my Avila in that moment of seduction. He said, My Allah, may Allah subhana, Allah protect me, right
seeking refuge in Allah. So that's a very good one.
		
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			People who are glasses Take off your glasses?
		
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			Well, it depends on how bad your sight is, right?
		
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			If you're nothing, then that's fine. But there are some people who if they take off their glasses,
it's just a little bit blurry.
		
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			They're not going to walk into a ditch, right? So that's, that's a real tip Yes.
		
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			Absolutely.
		
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			Train yourself very, train yourself. A lot of times, for example, like, let me tell you something.
		
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			When we were kids, we were waiting for PG 13 to be 13. So you could watch PG 13 movies, and then
you're waiting to be 18. So you could watch rated our movies and go to the theaters and watch you
know, but the reality is, and now you might sit there and put parental locks on your kids Netflix
device and all that types over your siblings. And you're like, but I'm an adult, so I can watch this
stuff. No, if it's nc 17, it's still haram for you to watch.
		
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			Like, if it's got *, and if it's got all of these types of things, it's still haram for us,
even if we're at. So a person has to have sensitivity. And something that I always remind people to
think about is that with as as much as * has now ramped it in our societies, and even with
people trying to get better, many times a trigger can cause a relapse. And so as a family you guys
are sitting down, everybody's watching, I don't know. So whatever, some random show on Netflix, and
then there's some * or there's an explicit scene or something like that. And somebody in the
family now or someone in the group or someone in right now that person is
		
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			going down a spiral again,
		
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			and half the room doesn't know or more. It's something to pay attention to the believers protect one
another as best as they can. That's why it's very, very important that you pay attention to what you
like on social media, what you because that gets fed to your followers. You might have a person
who's miskeen they're minding their business on Instagram but you like the photo and it shows up on
their on their feed now or you like something on Twitter so it shows up on their feed especially my
sisters I need you to pay attention to this because this is something that you see more from sisters
again because they don't realize I'm supposed to lower my gaze from from women as well. So then they
		
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			bring it on to the feeds of of the men in their family or whoever's following up. Okay, now
		
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			about lowering your gaze. Something interesting someone said marriage
		
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			and marriage is definitely
		
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			let me let me tell you this.
		
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			The year is 2017.
		
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			I go online, and everyone has these lemon emojis.
		
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			Apparently Beyonce had dropped an album called lemonade. Okay.
		
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			And I'm trying to figure out what is this what's happening. And the marketing ploy was that Jay Z
had cheated on her. And I remember being in the car with my brother, my younger brother, I only have
one brother, but he's more in tune with these things than I am. And I asked him a question. And I
said, How does? How does Beyonce get cheated on? She's Beyonce. Like she's considered to be one of
the most beautiful women in the world.
		
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			He just looks at me, he goes, Yeah, but he's J. Zito.
		
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			I'm like, Okay. So then, but that, that opens up a question, right? If if, if marrying the most
beautiful woman in the world,
		
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			or one of them is not going to cause a person to stop cheating, then what's going to what's going to
do it?
		
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			marry another one, even if you marry another one.
		
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			Even if you marry another one again.
		
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			Because you look at somebody like Tiger Woods, right? Tiger Woods, his good guy image always
shattered by his wife shattering
		
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			chasing after him with those golf clubs. And the idea of marrying another woman, Tiger was going
through women who all looked like his supermodel wife. They all look like his wife. So then what's
going to stop a person from cheating?
		
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			self respect.
		
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			So hold on a second.
		
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			What's going to cause a person to stop looking first of all, you know, one time I was sitting with a
chef of mine, this was before I got married.
		
00:27:13 --> 00:27:15
			And, you know,
		
00:27:16 --> 00:27:23
			asking me about my single life and all of that, like people asked single people what's going on?
What, what's up with you, blah, blah, blah.
		
00:27:25 --> 00:27:26
			And so I remember
		
00:27:28 --> 00:28:06
			I don't remember like, it was as if he didn't like my answers or something like that. Or maybe he
just wanted to give me this advice. But he said, I just want you to know that no matter who you
marry, that's not going to stop you from noticing female beauty. It's not. It's not like you get
married. It's like Hollis. I don't I have blinders on for the rest of my life. That's not how it
works. He said even the province of Elijah cinnamon salsa but ALLAH SubhanA dal it's a long episode
and so with Eliza but Allah tells the Prophet after the story of the province has ended up divorcing
his wives. He didn't divorce them. He separated them he he came in, he gave them the option. Do you
		
00:28:06 --> 00:28:19
			want to stay with me? Or should I let you go? He gave every single wife that option, every single
one of them because to live with the Prophet sallallahu sallam was to live in financial difficulty.
And so he gave all of them an ultimatum that Allah told him to give them.
		
00:28:21 --> 00:28:39
			And then after all of them chose him, No, you want to stay with you. Allah Subhana Allah said, those
who chose you it is not allowed for you to then leave them for any other women. Willow Jabba has
known even if their beauty pleases you.
		
00:28:40 --> 00:28:53
			I even Rasulullah sallallahu wasallam who's married to beautiful women, the likes of Aisha and
Sophia and Xena and we know their beauty Rasulullah sallallahu. wasallam is not immune from the
beauty of another woman catching his eye
		
00:28:54 --> 00:29:10
			to the answer that question of just marry another one. It's not going to it's not going to immunize
anybody. But then the question then becomes, so what protects. What protects is that a person has
Taqwa
		
00:29:11 --> 00:29:54
			that they don't follow one glance with another glance, that they restrict their vision that they
protect their heart that they don't engage in conversations that are unnecessary that they don't
open up doors of fitna for themselves. They don't put themselves in proximity for extended periods
of time, that could cause for the development of feelings and all of these types of things. A person
stays protected. That is all Taqwa. And that is what protects. Even fasting fasting. If a person
doesn't have taqwa, it's not going to protect them. The Prophet Salla lightyear send them told young
men to get too fast and young women as well to fast because he says it is our Golden Buzzer. It
		
00:29:54 --> 00:30:00
			causes the lowering of the gaze, and it protects a person's chastity but more
		
00:30:00 --> 00:30:29
			is important ingredients for sure is that a person exercises stuck. There's a beautiful drought that
the province of the lightest that I'm taught us to say which is Allahumma at Fini Behala Anika and
hyaluronic was Nene before the currency whack Oh Allah make the halal enough for me over that which
is haram. Whatever you've made up had, for me make that enough for me. You gave me a spouse to teta
for me make that enough for me. You gave me this that's highlight for me make that enough for me.
And make me not in need of anyone other than you.
		
00:30:32 --> 00:30:39
			Make me not in need of anyone other than you. Yes, I sure you had a question or comments. I was
gonna say gratitude as well.
		
00:30:40 --> 00:30:44
			Absolutely gratitude, a person realizing that
		
00:30:48 --> 00:30:51
			there's nothing easy except what Allah Subhana Allah makes easy.
		
00:30:52 --> 00:31:16
			And marriage of a righteous person can be very easy, but if it's easy, it's only because Allah made
it easy because it could be one of the most hardest thing that a person finds. And so if you do find
it, and you're fortunate enough to find it, that you'd be grateful for it. Okay, you said Go ahead,
man. Shaolin salah, call me Munna Saba li en su sir Hulu.
		
00:31:19 --> 00:31:38
			So he says, My naturalness, whoever lives here, whoever interacts with people, stays with people
engages with people lack I mean humo massaman. They experience muscle. You know, and that's a bit
it's not so obvious fatigue exhaustion. Allah says for either for the fun sub
		
00:31:40 --> 00:31:40
			that saw that
		
00:31:42 --> 00:31:43
			my shirt
		
00:31:44 --> 00:32:02
			that when you O Muhammad Sallallahu SLM have have exhausted when you fulfilled all of your duties,
then stand in exhaustion to Allah Subhana darland fatigue. So he's saying Whoever interacts with
people, talk to any school teacher, talk to any Imam talk to anybody in community service in any
field.
		
00:32:04 --> 00:32:06
			They're exhausted by people. It's exhausting.
		
00:32:10 --> 00:32:14
			And yet, there's incredible reward. There's incredible reward.
		
00:32:16 --> 00:32:30
			Swipe last week we talked about the province the lightest, some said that the believer who interacts
with people and endures their harm is better than the believer who doesn't interact with people is
it easier for you to just not interact with people and separate yourself? Yeah, of course it's
easier.
		
00:32:32 --> 00:33:14
			But which is more were audible for me to mix and for me to interact. And that's why the Prophet saw
the light I sent them home set a model the lioness says that also lost a little lady said them would
not leave his house. Except he would look up towards the sky. hadith is intimidate the Abu Dawood
and he would make this dua for things. And it's really important that these guys be learned. He used
to say, Allah Khomeini oh the beacon or Linda Odin Oh as in La Rosa. Oh of Lim Oh, Islam. Oh, oh
utility for things. Oh Allah, I seek refuge in You, from oppressing someone or being oppressed by
someone or misguiding someone or being misguided by someone or slipping or being caused to slip or
		
00:33:14 --> 00:33:18
			being ignorant or someone ignorantly acting towards me.
		
00:33:20 --> 00:33:37
			That's, that's what you're expecting when you go out into the world of men. The world of people that
either someone oppresses you or you hopefully don't oppress anybody in the provinces enemies seeking
refuge from Allah from all of these outcomes. Okay, yes, Kiva woman you fed to Sharon, you,
		
00:33:39 --> 00:33:45
			Li mu, for julu in one swing, who?
		
00:33:46 --> 00:33:57
			Whoever investigates their brothers ends up hating them for the majority of brothers in this day and
age betray, and who takes counsel from the passage of time, we'll see the true nature of time on
display. So
		
00:33:59 --> 00:34:02
			he says, whoever you fetish, any one.
		
00:34:03 --> 00:34:23
			And this could be understood in two ways. It could be the person who's looking for friends, the
person who's looking for brothers, they end up hating them, like, because of how few they are, like
how few the true real friends are. So it's like, you end up despising entire communities because
you're looking for like a real friend and you don't find them.
		
00:34:24 --> 00:34:39
			So that's one way and the other way is whoever searches not searches for friends. But the one who
investigates their friends manufacture channel one, meaning the one who, who looks for their faults.
		
00:34:41 --> 00:34:54
			And that's why we have statements like never meet your heroes. Because the more you interact with
people, the more their true selves become uncovered to you. A lot of times you just end up being
disappointed.
		
00:34:57 --> 00:34:59
			And that's why it's so important.
		
00:35:00 --> 00:35:48
			that a person not attached their Iman to people have to live near Mr. Little Dillard. He has a
really amazing statement and amazing statement. He says, even before that Allah Subhana Allah says,
Allah it can levena Had Allah forbid Buddha who the Teddy Allah says those are the ones whom Allah
subhanaw taala guided and then Allah says so follow their guidance and he doesn't say follow them.
We don't have personality worshipping Islam. Unfortunately when we hear about this imam or this
person or this you know influencer this this this this and then we find out about some sort of,
what's the word I'm looking for scandal, okay? And then I'm like, Oh my God, my Iman went down. Your
		
00:35:48 --> 00:36:29
			image should have never been attached to that person in the first place. Your image should be
attached to Allah Subhana Allah to Allah tool Rasulullah cellulitis, Allah, that's not going to
disappoint you. For who a rock no in Hanukkah. arcano that's where we went last week that whoever
relies upon Allah subhanaw taala that person is never going to be disappointed. That is the corner
that is the support. But if I attached my mind to individuals and personalities, then I should not
be surprised if I'm ever disappointed. Now, what is Abdullah of Newman's own statement he says
beautifully, he says mankind was stagnant for less than maybe mankind Matt, whoever of you is like
		
00:36:29 --> 00:36:44
			looking to follow the Sunnah of anybody follow the Sunnah of those who have passed away. Now I want
the genius of River Oaks Islamic center tonight the genius of plus one to tell us who is Abdullah
and Miss O talking about
		
00:36:45 --> 00:36:54
			of dilemmas. Oh says I'll say it again. He said whoever used to seeking to follow the Sunnah of
anybody follow the Sunnah of those who have passed away.
		
00:36:56 --> 00:36:57
			Who is he talking about?
		
00:36:59 --> 00:37:06
			The province of Allah is no hold on. I need somebody to raise their hand because we need to praise
you individually if you get this right.
		
00:37:08 --> 00:37:09
			Yes.
		
00:37:11 --> 00:37:12
			The Sahaba
		
00:37:13 --> 00:37:14
			that was too easy.
		
00:37:15 --> 00:37:17
			No, no, no, absolutely. We asked this here.
		
00:37:19 --> 00:37:26
			The prophets. No, no, it is the Sahaba you're absolutely right. Take bear. If we had a crown, we'd
give it to you.
		
00:37:27 --> 00:37:36
			But we don't there's a harbor. Why is he talking about the cyber because he's a companion. So
there's only one generation of Muslims who could have died before him. It's the Sahaba
		
00:37:37 --> 00:38:10
			so he says if you want to follow the Sunnah of anybody follow the Sunnah of the companions. Why he
says for him that hey, man, I think he fits. He says because the living, you don't know whether they
are going to pass their tests or not. This is a beautiful metric for you to always have. If I'm
going to follow anybody, let me follow somebody who's passed away. Their, their, their, their, their
book has been closed, with them still being upon goodness, if it's a scholar, it can be a
contemporary scholar, but let me follow those who have passed away. And they were they stayed on the
path.
		
00:38:11 --> 00:38:40
			Because the living you never know what's going to happen to them. And then he talks about the
companions of Rasulullah sallallahu Sallam he says kind of Allah Allah in Omaha Roja, Kaluga, Le
Manoir Palo Alto, California. He said they had the deepest knowledge. And they had the most
righteous hearts, and they were the least superficial. They were a people whom Allah subhanaw taala
chose to establish the religion and to support his prophets Allah lightness and law. Okay, so
following the Sunnah of the prophets of Allah, this,
		
00:38:41 --> 00:38:53
			when he says, Whoever investigates their brothers, they'll end up hating them. But at the same time,
we have been prohibited from investigating anybody.
		
00:38:54 --> 00:39:15
			Allah Subhana Allah, Allah says, well, as he just says, who do not spy on one another. Islam intends
for that brotherhood and sisterhood to remain, Islam intends for that brotherhood and sisterhood to
be nurtured. And so Islam says, don't investigate one another. don't investigate, don't spy on one
another.
		
00:39:17 --> 00:39:21
			He says, For the majority of brothers in this day and age betray.
		
00:39:23 --> 00:39:49
			I confided in you in a moment of weakness. Five years ago, my beloved brother when we were super
close to one another, and now we find ourselves on opposite sides of the spectrum, or maybe we are
opposing each other on one thing. And so now you communicate and tell everybody you expose what I
told you five years ago or 10 years ago, that's betrayal. That's betrayal of trust.
		
00:39:50 --> 00:39:59
			He says the I don't agree that the majority of people and solid OMA has clear it's not the majority
of people. But you know, poets or poets do and he says
		
00:40:00 --> 00:40:07
			The majority of brothers betrayed that's not true. But if you don't, number one, rule number one is
keep your secrets to yourself.
		
00:40:08 --> 00:40:23
			That's rule number one. Your mama Shafi says, if your own chest was not spacious enough to keep your
own secret, than the chest of the one you're interesting is even more constricted.
		
00:40:25 --> 00:40:48
			If you yourself, tell your secret with you're on top, then you are a fool depicted. If your own
chest was too narrow to keep your own secret than the one you're interesting is even more
constricted. So number one is keep your secrets to yourself. Number two, is if you must, then try as
best as you can to someone whose religion you truly trust someone who's stuck what you really trust,
it's really embarrassing sometimes. One time I saw an msgid election,
		
00:40:50 --> 00:41:18
			because there was, you know, and it's embarrassing, because these are like uncles who should know
better. But because the election was very, very contemptuous. They want it they they pass out
pictures of one of the brothers family, like his daughters or something like that. They were out
clubbing and they got pictures of them in clubs, and they're spreading it out to the community, look
at this person's family, blah, blah, blah. It's like, horrible, absolutely horrible.
		
00:41:22 --> 00:41:31
			And this is also another reason I have a question for you. Is it ever allowed for you to expose your
sins for the purpose of trying to teach somebody a lesson through you?
		
00:41:32 --> 00:41:55
			So I used to do this back in the day, and I'm just letting you know, I'm talking to some teenagers,
and I'm letting them know about my, you know, the things that I used to do as a kind of a warning to
them. But don't we have that all the time, like, you know, this pastor, drug dealer, he, he repents,
and then he goes on tour in the Muslim community? You know, he talks about how he used to sell
drugs, and you know, they use him as like, inspiration for the kids and stuff like that.
		
00:41:56 --> 00:42:08
			So is it allowed? Is it allowed for a person to confess their sins for the purpose of warning other
people or teaching other people or what have you? Know, you still say no, yes.
		
00:42:09 --> 00:42:21
			As long as you say it's a bad thing. Okay. I say it's a bad thing. It's horrible. The fact that I
was doing X, Y, and Z is horrible, guys. Don't do it. And you tell people about how bad it was and
stuff like that.
		
00:42:24 --> 00:42:27
			Okay, so it's a double edged sword. How?
		
00:42:30 --> 00:42:30
			Good?
		
00:42:33 --> 00:42:35
			Okay, given warnings. Okay.
		
00:42:36 --> 00:42:38
			Same time, they might
		
00:42:41 --> 00:42:42
			say like.
		
00:42:45 --> 00:43:11
			Absolutely. So it's absolutely a double bladed or double edged sword. Because on one end, yes, you
could sit there with people and be like, Listen, guys, I did this, this, this and I'm letting you
know, it's not it. I was miserable. I was I was so out. It was such a dark place in my life. This is
this. That's one aspect. And they might absorb it correctly. And be like, Okay, thank you, you know,
we've learned the lesson. And another person might be like, well, you came out okay.
		
00:43:13 --> 00:43:16
			worked out fine for you. So
		
00:43:17 --> 00:43:18
			let me explore it, yes.
		
00:43:29 --> 00:43:59
			Absolutely. So if it's a public sin, then it becomes less problematic because everybody knows about
it already. So that's not exposing since. And even in the chapter of backbiting. When we talked
about backbiting, we said that one of the categories of people that it's not considered to be
Backbiting is a person who is a public sinner. So if everybody knows this person, as a drug dealer
and I say, I'm a drug dealer, someone can say, oh, that's backbiting. It's not backbiting. Everybody
knows he's a drug dealer. Okay, so So that's the idea. That's what happened.
		
00:44:08 --> 00:44:22
			So is there a difference between a person who is a convert exposing their sins before now? The only
difference is is that that person sins have been forgiven? The Congress sense has been forgiven, but
in the sense, guys, let me tell you guys something about since
		
00:44:23 --> 00:44:33
			Why does Islam fool Why does Islam obligate the suffocation of sins? Why does Islam say you can
expose yourself Islam says
		
00:44:35 --> 00:44:36
			yes undermine
		
00:44:39 --> 00:44:40
			Well, I was trying to finish the sentence verse.
		
00:44:42 --> 00:44:53
			But why does Islam say like you have to suffocate sins and you can't share it then you have to say
Yes, I'm that I'm already got so you have a sin that's between you and Allah. You go out and
publicize it.
		
00:44:56 --> 00:44:59
			Yes, publicize the sin. Yes. So you
		
00:45:00 --> 00:45:11
			More as more people you're normalizing it becomes normalized 100% 100%. Once if you you become an
actor and propagating the sin in normalizing this.
		
00:45:13 --> 00:45:18
			You guys have heard this term before, right? I'm gonna be a model for Nandan Mancha, commanding,
		
00:45:19 --> 00:45:34
			say with me commanding, good and forbidding evil. Okay, now that we've all agreed that commanding
good and forbidding evil, I want you all to know that my roof does not mean good. And monka does not
mean evil.
		
00:45:36 --> 00:45:44
			Commanding does not mean good. And monka does not mean evil. Now, for those of you who know Arabic,
what is the word for good,
		
00:45:45 --> 00:45:47
			fair? And what is the word for evil?
		
00:45:51 --> 00:46:07
			So there you go. So why do we translate commanding good and forbidding evil because it's the closest
thing but now if we peel back the layer of what the actual Arabic word is, we're going to understand
something very profound. What this even an undo odo what does my roof mean?
		
00:46:09 --> 00:46:09
			Yes.
		
00:46:11 --> 00:46:12
			In Arabic, what does my roof mean?
		
00:46:13 --> 00:46:17
			That which is no so in Urdu and Arabic model means that which is known.
		
00:46:19 --> 00:46:30
			So promoting that which is known, what does Moon Qatar mean in Arabic, something that is Nikola, you
learned Nikita and Malefor. What is monka 10 key.
		
00:46:32 --> 00:46:40
			It is something that is unknown, unrecognizable. A masquerade party Not that I've ever been to one
it's called hafla tankier okay.
		
00:46:41 --> 00:46:43
			Because you are hiding yourself.
		
00:46:48 --> 00:46:49
			So
		
00:46:50 --> 00:47:22
			Munkar means that which is recognized, sorry, my roof means that which is recognized that which is
known, I would translate it as that which is mainstream. And mukha is that which is unknown, that
which is underground. Now, for the roof to stay my roof, it has to be promoted. If one generation
loses it, then that which one generation recognized to be good, becomes munkar. Nobody knows it.
They're not familiar with it.
		
00:47:23 --> 00:48:00
			A simple example in 1015 more years if nobody ever hosts guests anymore, people don't ask people in
their houses anymore, that my roof becomes munkar. And then at the same time, if that which is
unknown. And I think we all have examples that come to mind the things that were unknown 1015 20
years ago, people did not practice it. It was very suffocated, it was very underground. And then it
became promoted and promoted and promoted, so much so that now it's considered to be my roof. Where
if you're talking to kids who are 1512, they'll argue with you and they'll be like, No, there's
nothing wrong with this. It's my roof.
		
00:48:02 --> 00:48:48
			So what Islam is saying, even in those two words that are chosen, it is understood that they need
active participation, that my roof needs activity to be supported and promoted so that it stays well
known. It stays mainstream. And the munkar requires activity to be suffocated, so that it stays
unknown and stays underground. Does that make sense? Excellent. Yes, so pretty much what you're
saying is making no keep know what is known and keep unknown what is unknown. Yes, make virtual
mainstream, make virtue mainstream and suffocate sins. And you know, why? Because if you allow for
it to bubble to the surface, then the moniker becomes mouth. The moniker becomes narrow. So keep
		
00:48:48 --> 00:49:32
			going is here, man is Stasha rasuluh, Danny POM Allahu Allah happy, haven't gotten it. Done, Honey
Boo. Boo. So whoever takes counsel from the passage of time will see the true nature of time on
display. If you pay attention to time, you see how time is treacherous. You see your parents aging,
and you realize that you're going to go through that as well. You see, nations rise and fall, and
you know that every nation is going to rise and fall because that's the nature that's the nature of
time. People pass away, you realize that you're going to pass away because that's the nature of time
as well. There's nobody who stays forever. Time does not change for anybody. These are the Sunnah of
		
00:49:32 --> 00:49:59
			Allah subhanaw taala. And the wise person is the one who takes heat from others. You're in your 20s
you're going to enter into your 30s you're in your 30s you're going to enter into your 40s you're in
your 40s you're gonna enter your 50s time doesn't stop for anybody, right? So you realize that when
you study time and you pay attention to it, yes. Many years Laurie shall see our TV, no matter where
you
		
00:50:00 --> 00:50:00
			Has this
		
00:50:03 --> 00:50:32
			man is Diana Isla Ashura Nina my Wifey, Amin Sleeman, who muesli Luma for unban. So whoever sows
evil will harvest regret, as a consequence for the harvest of what you plant must appear, whoever
lets their guard down amongst the wicked wait to find their shirt filled with snakes that they fear.
So whoever sows evil with harvest will harvest regret. Whoever sows evil will harvest regret.
		
00:50:33 --> 00:50:35
			We all
		
00:50:36 --> 00:50:39
			every day are out sowing things into this earth.
		
00:50:40 --> 00:50:44
			And whoever sows evil, they're going to regret it.
		
00:50:45 --> 00:51:17
			And the province of Elijah said, Love once was asked by my eyes in the German about what will bring
him closer to paradise and bring him protecting from the hellfire and the province. Allah has said
I'm talking about as a long Hadith beautiful Hadith important Hadith. But then he tells me, he says,
Shall I not tell you something that will gather all of this for you? And he said, Yes, he said,
cofilin Shahada. He grabbed his tongue and he said, guard this. And what are the major? Well, he
asked a question that I remember thinking to myself, How could a person asked this question?
		
00:51:18 --> 00:52:00
			He said, Yeah, Rasul Allah, are we held accountable for what our tongue say? Are we able to
accountable and the province of Allah the same said, moron, may your mother lose you? It's an
expression. He goes, What will cause people to enter into their faces or on their faces into the
Hellfire other than the harvest of their tongues? Like what else is gonna cause people to enter the
Hellfire other than their tongues? And I remember thinking to myself, How did why have have such a
disconnect between what he says? And the repercussions, the consequences? The fact that you'll be
asked, and I realized the truthfulness of that statement, when I saw Muslim Twitter.
		
00:52:04 --> 00:52:10
			The fact that people can just tweet things as if they're not going to be asked about it.
		
00:52:11 --> 00:52:41
			The promise of Elijah Selim he saw a person on the night of Elissa when met Raj, who was ripping his
cheeks, ripping his cheeks in perpetuity. He's just always ripping this cheek and that cheek and
this chicken that chick incredibly painful. And he asked about, he asked the angels he said, Who is
this person. And later on the angels told him he said, This is a person who you saw who lied, and
his lie spread around the world.
		
00:52:42 --> 00:52:43
			going viral
		
00:52:45 --> 00:52:46
			can be a very dangerous thing.
		
00:52:48 --> 00:52:53
			If it is a lie, if it is an insult, if it is, if it reaches the world.
		
00:52:56 --> 00:53:01
			And so a person should always make sure that the seeds that you're planting into this world are
good.
		
00:53:02 --> 00:53:08
			And if a person because even if a person repents, even if a person repents from whatever since
		
00:53:10 --> 00:53:19
			it's incredibly problematic when a person has planted seeds that are still growing, even after a
person has repented.
		
00:53:20 --> 00:53:38
			Person has written books a person's written articles person's made videos a person's like actors,
actresses musician like even if they repent their apprentice, a little Allah subhanaw taala but I
don't want what I've sewn into this world to be continuing to mislead people, after I myself have
repented.
		
00:53:39 --> 00:53:50
			So a precarious position to be in. But of course, even that person, what do they do that then they
try their best, whatever vehicles they've used.
		
00:53:51 --> 00:54:09
			Not whatever vehicles but whatever energy they've consumed, in trying to spread, fascia and monka
and all of these types of things, that a person use it to spread goodness spread seeds of goodness,
as much as they spread seeds of evil and harm.
		
00:54:11 --> 00:54:11
			Yes.
		
00:54:16 --> 00:54:21
			You genuinely want to cancel like, That's repentance.
		
00:54:23 --> 00:54:28
			Or still kind of like that's, that's repentance. That's repentance. But they're not
		
00:54:30 --> 00:54:38
			they're not but again, that's part of the regret right? That's the point that he's saying he's
saying that that that's regret there's no person shakes that for example, who
		
00:54:39 --> 00:54:43
			let's just say hypothetical, you have this crazy supermodel
		
00:54:45 --> 00:54:59
			photos everywhere. She's She's inspiring young girls all over the world to be like her and what have
you and then she repents to ALLAH SubhanA danas she becomes a hijab and all that type of stuff.
Right? That image she might not even own her own image, but it's still being spread.
		
00:55:00 --> 00:55:17
			then all of that type of stuff. So her job at that point in time if it was spread publicly that she
publicly redact as best as you can she publicly speak out about it, the energy that she was using on
the catwalk or the one way, whatever it was, she uses it now trying to promote her job promote
modesty, all of that type of stuff as best as she can.
		
00:55:20 --> 00:55:20
			Yeah.
		
00:55:22 --> 00:55:22
			Okay.
		
00:55:24 --> 00:55:27
			Let's end it Charlotte data with whatever comments questions people have.
		
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			If someone asks you and he says, Did you commit this sin before? And you say no, to cover it up? Is
that okay?
		
00:55:35 --> 00:55:39
			So not a straight line, but I would say a diversion.
		
00:55:40 --> 00:55:41
			Okay.
		
00:55:45 --> 00:55:49
			Not a straight line, did you commit this and be like, what I look like a clown to you?
		
00:55:50 --> 00:55:51
			Keep it moving?
		
00:55:53 --> 00:55:56
			You know, say so? You? Yes.
		
00:55:59 --> 00:56:03
			Okay, so two things real quick. I'm going to answer this in one minute or less.
		
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			Number one, do you ask a prospective spouse? If they've had a pass?
		
00:56:12 --> 00:56:12
			No.
		
00:56:14 --> 00:56:23
			I would not encourage anybody to do that. In fact, if someone came point blank and asked me, I just
want to let you know, do you have a past? I would say just go ahead. Thank you very much. This has
been a wonderful evening.
		
00:56:25 --> 00:56:33
			Honestly, because if you came to me, and you asked me that question, that in and of itself is
insulting.
		
00:56:34 --> 00:56:55
			That in and of itself is insulting, you came from your house to my family, and this is what you're
expecting? So that's number one. And then number two, is that person then allowed? Let's say they
have a past they repented to Allah subhanaw taala, all that type of stuff. Now I've got some guy
asking me or some girl asking me about my past point blank like that, then what do I look like a
clamp?
		
00:56:57 --> 00:57:00
			I would just use some sort of vague terminology like that. I asked.
		
00:57:07 --> 00:57:18
			This is Jeff. So I saw his answer. This is a lot of our machines answer that you don't put yourself
in these types of precarious situations and that you shouldn't ask in the first place. Yes.
		
00:57:23 --> 00:57:48
			Obviously, if the past affects the present, then that becomes an issue. But again, am I asking for
that that's on that person? Right? There are other ways for a person to ask. So for example, their
issues that do affect the presence of them is as far as marriage goes, everybody should get a very
detailed medical clearance when you're getting married. And that should that could include it should
include STDs. Okay, but beyond that,
		
00:57:49 --> 00:57:56
			at the end of the day marriage, no matter what, marriage is always going to have an element of
tobacco, and risk.
		
00:57:57 --> 00:58:17
			And so I do my best and I have to put in Allah subhanaw taala. And I don't do investigations and
things. Allah subhana Dias is what they just says, who don't spy. So I do my best. I'm looking for a
person. I'm not walking into blind but at the same time, I'm not I'm not looking for skeletons.
Because if you look for skeletons, you might find something that even though it isn't a skeleton,
it's going to ruin your marriage.
		
00:58:20 --> 00:58:20
			Yeah.
		
00:58:21 --> 00:58:22
			Any other questions?
		
00:58:25 --> 00:58:27
			going once going twice, yes.
		
00:58:31 --> 00:58:48
			Yeah, that's fine. If a conversation happens in the public sphere, then you can address it in the
public sphere, no problem for our entire history. Or they might have made factoids and other LMS
have, you know, refuted them and discussions happened in the public sphere. Something happens in the
public sphere. That's not that's not considered to be backbiting.