Ammar Alshukry – Commanding Good & Forbidding Evil
AI: Summary ©
The speakers discuss the importance of avoiding harmsening behavior in Islam, avoiding false accusations, and being authentic in one's behavior. They stress the need for engagement and understanding context, and provide advice on how to make one's advice more palatable and acceptable. The importance of sincerity and avoiding harmsening behavior is emphasized, and advice is given on how to make one's advice more palatable and acceptable. The segment also provides advice on avoiding advertisements on social media and the importance of acknowledging when one is doing the wrong thing.
AI: Summary ©
hamdulillah salatu salam ala Rasulillah Salam Seema cathedra Delilah Hill Allah who will actually Nicola Muhammad Abdullah solo salatu Robbie Salam Ra. So today our session is about this concept of an honorable model for the Hanuman got a commanding the good and forbidding evil. And I have to say
that normally, when people think of commanding good and forbidding evil, they think of groups of people with frowns, noticing that which is wrong with people in the public sphere. So this person's close and this person's act, whatever it is that a person does, or you think of people who self righteous might stick in you, looking down upon you, judging you and what have you. But in reality, this concept I'm Robyn Moreno for now, and the moon car is a pillar of the dean.
And because it is a pillar of the dean, it must be beautiful. And it must be healthy and it must be good. And it must be something that we cannot afford to let go of. And so what we want to do is we want to understand this pillar. We want to understand this pillar, can you guys hear me okay?
Yes, we want to understand this pillar so that we can implement that which Allah subhanaw taala loves for us to do Allah Subhana Allah Allah says welcoming come OMA, let there arise from amongst you an ummah, you have to own a little hair, who call to goodness, yeah Munna bin ma roofie. Went home animal car, they command good and they forbid evil. And Allah Subhana Allah to Allah He also says come to chromatin Octavia Tina's Allah says you are the best OMA to ever arise amongst mankind. And of all of the tumors were the vessel mo were better than the love nor were better than the love Musa were better than all of those who are better than the Mother Teresa were better than the OMA of
every prophet who has ever existed. And Allah subhana wa Tada says, Why Morona been my roof, you command good, and you forbid evil will took me no nebula and you believe in Allah Subhana Allah Allah. And so when ALLAH SubhanA, Allah describes our hadiah as being the best Ummah,
the first qualities that he mentions is this quality of commanding good and forbidding evil, and believing in Allah subhana data.
And so when we engage with people, you see something that is good, and you want to encourage it more or, more commonly, you see something that is wrong, and you reach out to that brother or sister and you say, Sit on my aching brother or sister, I just want to let you know that this isn't something that you should do. This is something that's how to, um, this is something that's forbidden in Islam, what are the responses that you almost automatically get? I want to actually start off with some of these responses. And you guys are smiling because you know, the responses very well.
The first response
might go something like this. Don't worry about me. Worry about yourself.
Mind your own business. Why are you worried about what I do? Allah is not going to ask you about Me, Allah is going to ask you about you. Are these the types of responses that we may hear?
And so the answer to that is a number of things. But firstly,
is that Allah Subhana? Allah is not just going to ask me about me. Allah is going to ask me about you. You all know the Hadith, that since like a Muslim, we've heard it most of our lives Imam and no, he has it in his collection of the IDF, Rasulullah sallallahu sallam, he says, mira, I mean, c'mon, Quran, whoever you see is an evil to do what? Tell me, then change it, change it with what? Change it with their hand. And if you are not able to then change it with your tongue challenges, speak out against it. And if you're not able to do that, then change it with your heart. And that is the lowest level of faith, the lowest level of faith is when I see something wrong, that at the very
least I engage with my art and I say, I don't like this outcome.
But if I'm able to do more than that, talk to the person then talk to the person, change it with my tongue. And if I'm able to do even more than that, because I have authority over this person, they're a sibling of mine, they're a child of mine, they're, they're an employee of mine or whatever, I have the ability to actually change the situation with my hand, then I change it with my hand.
So Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi salam tells me that I actually have to engage you. But even more particular than that will work out the Allah and who wants to go up on the mimbar
because there is a verse of the Quran that seems to speak to what that argument is.
Allah subhanaw taala says to those who have believed I they come full circle ly adoro C'mon Bala either today to
you are not harmed by those who are misguided if you are guided so just worry about yourself. And so Abu Bakr the Allah, I know God on the up on the member and he said, oh people, y'all are reading this wrong, you're understanding this wrong.
This is not talking about if I if I see people who are misguided I see my brother not praying that I don't need to worry about him as long as I'm praying, then I'm okay. He said, No, you're you're misunderstanding this verse. I heard the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam say that if a people see someone doing something wrong, and they do not challenge them, they do not seek to correct that behavior. Allah subhanho data may encompass all of them in his punishment.
Everybody might be encompassed in the punishment if they do not check those who are doing wrong. And so I'm in this with you.
I am not required, not Am I not required, I am not allowed to go into your private business. Allah subhana data says what I say just so Allah says Don't, don't,
don't spy on one another. I'm not allowed to spy on you, while you do behind your closed doors, that's completely up to you. But what you bring to the public sphere, what you do in front of me, or what you bring online, and you bring onto my newsfeed. Now that's public. And so you can't do something publicly and then say worry about you mind your own business, you made it my business. You're the one who brought it to my attention. I was minding my business, but then you brought it into my sphere. And so when you do that, then I am obligated by the province of Allah to set it up, I have obligated by Allah subhanho data before it to challenge and to seek to correct seek to
rectify. So the first argument that I've presented is my drone business, say hold on a second, I was minding my business, you made it my business to engage by making it public or presenting it to me. That's number one. Number two, another argument that gets really
well, how about you tell me what's another argument that you hear?
What is something that you hear from people when you whenever you try to correct any behavior?
Allah subhanaw taala knows my intention.
Okay, that's fine.
Allah knows your intention. But what I am required to do is what?
Correct any behavior.
I don't know your intention when it comes to doing something. But if it's behavior that is not allowed in Islam, then I am also required to challenge it and to correct it. Your intention was of Allah subhanho wa taala. But your action if it is something that is forbidden, I am required to challenge
another one that people ask or people respond with it.
We're all at different levels of iman.
And that's absolutely true. We're all at different levels of EMA.
And so what that does is it doesn't require for me to no longer engage. But what it does require is it requires for me to engage with different tools from my toolbox. So I don't treat a person who knows like a person who doesn't know, I don't treat a person who is close to me, like a person who's distant.
I have different tools, some people I might be able to use a hammer with, because they should know better. Or I have incredible rapport with them. So I can be tough with them. And they will accept it from me because of the rapport that I have with them. I had a brother one time he was a friend of mine, he said to me, when this is when we were much younger, we were like
early 20s. And the way that I said it made it seem like I was much older. But anyway, let's just backtrack. But he said
he was
he went to a conference where people were very, very harsh.
And he absorbed from them a hadith about treating people with a lot of harshness, the chef or the scholar there was there was coding to them. Things like I'll do live near Amara Gila and one time a man came to him and he said, I love you for the sake of Allah and I'm to live and I said, I hate you for the sake of Allah.
I said why? He said because you're one of the people who when you make the other and you make it like you're singing
this guy when he makes the event, he just goes completely off all over the place. And so I'll go live in Rome, I didn't like his event. And so that man comes to the living room and he says, I love your music of Allah. And he said I hate you for the sake of Allah. So my friend is telling me we got to you know, sometimes you got to be harsh with people I said, Hold on a second there, bro. Like you have to understand context. You have to understand context of the live near Omar is a young companion during the time of the Prophet still alive days.
Allah, when the Sahaba, the elder Sahaba passed away in our evolution of fic have to live near Omar, and those young companions, they became the teachers of the Muslim world. That's why I'm delighted that my mother is one of the most prolific narrators of hadith is because those young Sahaba when the political climate of the Muslim world settled, it's after the time of the forefoot of Isha and Abdullah and ibis and I'm delighted that I'm living in the US and I'm delighted to remember these figures, they became the teachers of the OMA. That's why they are the greatest narrators of Hadith as far as number Ayesha has way more Hadith than her father. Even though her father obviously
accompany the province, little light is more than anybody else, but it's because of the it's because of the way history developed. They lived for a long time after the elder Sahaba. And so they were the ones who taught the Ummah My point is, is that I've lived near Omar is a senior figure at this point in time in the Muslim world, and he's an old man.
And so when a young man comes to them, and He's the senior chef, and scholar of the Sahaba, at that point in time, he says to him, I love you for the sake of Allah and he says, I hate you for the sake of Allah, of course, he's going to accept from him whatever he says, because of his seniority and age and his seniority and knowledge, you're not going to, you know, you will accept from an old elderly man, what you're not going to accept from a young man and you're going to accept from a scholar, and you're not going to accept from somebody else. And so when he says to him, I hate you, for the sake of Allah, that man is going to change whatever behavior got him that statement. And so
the live note, I'm gonna says to him, you make your own, like the amount of singers he's like, Okay, I'm not gonna do that again. But I'm telling my friend, if you go around telling people, I hate you, for the sake of Allah, a person's just gonna say, you will come hate me outside, then.
Let's go outside and tell me how much you hate me. You're not gonna get the results that the live Naramata got. So you have to understand that you use different tools for different people. It depends also on who you are. And that's the beauty of it has another person, you know, the famous story, and has an in person. They're both young kids at the time.
A 910 11, what have you, but they see an uncle making model wrong.
Now him making model wrong is a Monica, it's something to be checked, it's something to be corrected, but how are you going to correct it in a way that he's going to accept.
And so they both come to him brilliantly. And they put him in a position of authority. And they say to him, uncle, both me and my brother are saying that we're making will do better than the other, I think I make will do better than my brother and my brother thinks that he makes will do better than me, why don't you judge between us and see who makes me look better? He says, Sure, no problem, I'll, I'll judge between you two. That hasn't makes me do perfectly. And he's watching.
And then Sam comes and he makes me look perfectly. And he's watching.
Okay, uncle, who who made a little better. And he says to the both of you made will do it perfectly. It was your uncle who was making will do it wrong.
But number one, they allowed for him to say face. And number two,
they put him in a position of authority. They use tools that are different than what they would have used if they were correcting somebody who is younger than them or someone who is equal to them. And so my point here is that when you're dealing with someone who's a convert, when you're dealing with somebody who is a Muslim, who doesn't know a lot, when you're dealing with somebody who is a stranger for the first time you're meeting them in the masjid, as opposed to someone who you've known for a very long time, I have to be very, very careful as to how I approach this person. But that does not affect my obligation to correct or to teach.
And so we're all at different levels of human. Absolutely. But I engage those levels of Eman differently, I engage those levels of human differently. Another argument that gets presented
is the argument of don't judge me.
Why are you judging me?
I have a question. Do we judge people?
In your day, in your day to day life? Do you judge people?
Do you judge people at work? Do you judge if you're a teacher? Do you judge your students?
If you are an employer, do you judge your employees?
Don't we all can see that you get judged in many different aspects of your life. And so why is the great crime that a person gets judged when it comes to a religious action? I get judged by the court of law. I get judged by the police officer when they're giving me a ticket. I get judged in all of these spheres. And yet, the one judgment that I do not accept is a judgment when it comes to the issue of the issue of religion. But not only that,
one i
I am judging I'm judging an action.
And I am not the one judging the action I am judging or I am simply communicating the judgment of Allah subhanho data regarding an action Allah Subhana Allah is the one who said drinking alcohol is Allah. Allah Subhana. Allah is the one who made this type of interaction or this type of transaction, something that's forbidden. And so something very important that you have to learn when it comes to the issue of commanding good and forbidding evil. Is that the fuqaha say the only evil that can be forbidden is an E is an evil. That is
that has no difference of opinion with regards to it being haram.
Meaning
I can't forbid the evil of eating for example, nuns Ebihara meat. I saw this brother eating heb chicken. That's how wrong I can't pray behind this person. Okay, first of all, hold on a second. This is an issue of difference of opinion. A number one it doesn't have anything to do with praying behind the person in the first place. But it's an issue of difference of opinion eating is a behemoth versus eating Lonza behind me eating chicken from a little Kitab eating, you know, this issue of difference of opinion. So I can't impose my filthy position on the entire ummah. It is something that is a valid difference of opinion. Sister who believes that niqab is wajib. She's
coming and she's telling all of the sisters who don't believe that niqab is wider that you are doing tuber Roach and this is haram. Hold on. It's an issue of difference of opinions very famous, very valid difference of opinion. Okay, so I can't impose on issues about a valid difference of opinion. However, if something is something that is there is no difference of opinion about it.
And I see my brother or sister doing it, that it becomes something that I need to challenge becomes something that needs to change. So the issue of judgment, I'm not judging you with regards to your eventual destination with Allah subhanaw taala Yes, it's absolutely true. That you right now in the sight of Allah subhanaw taala might be better than me. I don't know your hitting the deeds. I don't know your public good deeds. I don't know your hidden sins. I don't You don't know my evidences, but guess what I do know this action.
And this is all that Allah Subhana Allah has obligated for me. All Allah Subhana Allah has obligated from me is that when I see something that is wrong, that I gently, beautifully as best as I can, as sincerely as I can advise that person to change their behavior. Because the Prophet sallallahu Sallam says if you do not do that, that it may be that the entire community is encompassed in Allah subhana diatas punishment and their Hadith about this, this meaning are many more than what I have the time to share inshallah Tada.
Another argument
any other arguments actually, that anybody wants to share?
Anything else as far as
arguments for
why a person should not be challenged or a person should not be corrected? Yes.
Don't be aware.
There'll be Muslim police. Okay, so don't be Muslim police.
Or don't be haram police. They used to call it back in the day. Don't be haram police. You know, what's amazing, is that the Haram police are the Muslim police. This idea has not gone gone away at all. You know, there used to be a time 1015 20 years ago where people were very aggressive with regards to what they saw people do publicly
to the point where if you came to the masjid, I know some misguided where the person came to the masjid people would would would literally check the clothes that they're wearing people would be out the door checking the clothes that you're wearing are your pants below the ankles are above the ankles to that degree.
But every action brings about an equal and positive or equal and opposite reaction. It brings about an equal and opposite reaction. And so the pendulum has swung the complete other way. We're now we're walking on eggshells. And we can see the person doing the most haram thing in the world. And we're like, I don't want to be Muslim police. I don't want to be held on police.
But are there avenues where behavior is very strictly monitored and challenged?
I would argue absolutely us now in the public sphere, you know, at least before Muslims used to care about judgment based on the Quran and Sunnah. But now the Muslims who are most aggressive when it comes to policing behavior, do it based on liberal secular norms.
And so if you see someone doing something that's haram Islamically.
Then hold on a second, you know, don't be Muslim police. But if Muslims see someone who's doing something that is unconscionable.
Based on secular liberal norms, they might be very aggressive.
If so, if a Muslim says something that's considered to be racist, look at how aggressive people will be against this person. Or if a person says something that is considered to be
against the LGBT community, look at how aggressive people will be against that person. Or if a person says something that is considered to be
stereotypical of a gender,
male or female, look at how aggressive people will be, look at how, how severe people will consider this. And that's because the weights that are given to these things have become very, very, very heavy, whereas, shake with Allah subhanaw taala whether as committed or making statements about Allah subhanaw taala that are completely unacceptable, or making statements about the prophets of Allah to setting up or,
again, just things that Allah Subhana Allah has legislated, is being Haram are considered to be the Muslim police, right? And so, aggression still exists, but the values through which that aggression is enacted, have changed. So, what I wanted to do in the second half is I wanted to present some advice for advisors like how do you how do you make your advice more palatable? How do you make your advice more acceptable? When I'm going out into this world? And I'm trying to, to command good and forbid evil?
Actually, let me talk about this word for a second because even the translation I really don't like commanding good and forbidding evil and I've used it so much already. Commanding good, I'm rubbing my roof when Neha and Ivanka
what does my roof mean?
Good, no.
How do you say good in Arabic?
Fair? And how do you say evil in Arabic? Sure. And the Quran uses fair.
Allah Subhana Allah to Allah and the province of me shall exist this this this word, was shall rule ASA in the province of Elijah Selim says,
But why does Allah Subhana Allah how to use my roof and why does he use mooncup? What does my roof mean? Now roof means that which is in order to modify means what?
Something that is
not what are the speakers here on
my roof means known.
At least that's what it means in Arabic, I don't know if it means that an auditor or not, but it means something that's known, my roof is that which is recognized that which is familiar that which is known and mukha is that which is unknown, it is that which is unfamiliar. As so, my roof, this word, does it mean good, it means that which is recognized to be good that which is familiar, that which is main stream, I would say that which is popularly known and accepted and linker is not that which is bad, but Mukund is that which is unfamiliar, that which is unknown, that which is underground, you know, usually the bunker is supposed to be that which is suffocated, people are
embarrassed by it, people don't show people that they do it, because it is not good. But included in these two terms is character. And it is understood by good being called my roof and monk are being called munkar, that there is some sort of societal engagement that is required, meaning society has to promote the roof so that it continues to be familiar. from one generation to the next, I give you an example. Hospitality of guests, taking care of guests was something that in my parents generation, it was very mild, it was very known. It was very familiar that a guest come and stay at your house for a week or two weeks, or a month or two months or six months. These are all things
that were very mild, they were very familiar.
But in my generation, guests don't stay for that long. In fact that guests might not even stay for a day or two days, they'll come in, they'll check into a hotel, and they'll come and visit you while you're here. Right. So that idea of hospitality of the guests and spending so much time continues to become less and less maruf. Even though it's something that's good, and it is something that is recognized and it's not and it's something that is encouraged. My point here is that without the propagation of certain acts of goodness, it becomes less of a social norm. My wolf has the connotation of it being a social norm, it being something that is familiar, and the moon card is the
same monka is not just something that is evil monkey it is something that society recognizes as evil to the point where it becomes unfamiliar.
You don't see it.
But when the moon card is not suffocated, and it is not kept underground, and it is allowed to bubble to the surface, that from one generation to the next. You might have one generation that doesn't recognize this. It's it's a practice that we don't know I never saw people doing it
but
Over time it bubbles up and it bubbles up to the point where it becomes so familiar that the moon car becomes my roof. And what we are required to do is we are required to command on my roof, and we are commanded to prohibit our moon car, we need to keep the bunker underground, we need to keep it unknown, and we need to promote them out of so that it continues to be recognized from one generation to the next. And so how does a person engage in this concept?
What are some things that you can do as an advisor to make your advice more accepted?
Number one is sincerity.
Number one is sincerity. Whenever you want to talk to somebody, you have to ask yourself the question first, why am I talking to this person? Why am I correcting this person? Why am I teaching this person? Why am I sharing with this person? Is it so that I can flex on them?
Is it an exercise of my own ego? Am I doing this out of anger? Because I'm debating this person right now. And I think that his position is idiotic. So I want to show this idea that I need for this idea than I did.
Or is it because I sincerely want this person to be closer to Allah subhanaw taala through this exchange, succinct sincerity is really, really important. Because if I am sincere, and they are sincere, if I have a heart that sincere and that person has a heart that sincere then inshallah to Allah benefit will happen. But if there is a deficiency in my sincerity or deficiency in their sincerity, that is going to be very, very hard. But I don't control their sincerity. What I can control is my sincerity. And if I am sincere, what does that sincerity look like? It may look like me not talking to them at all.
You know, sometimes people are like, I want to give this person advice. I'm like, Why do you want to be the one to give them advice? Maybe they don't listen to you at all. Maybe you're their younger sibling, or maybe you're their child. You know, the funniest thing is when a child says I want to give my parents advice. Like, listen.
It's not just your parents, but it's all of our parents. When we talk to them, they see a baby talking.
They see the person whose diaper they changed, talking to them. It is very rare that you have the parent who can benefit from their child.
It is said that Imam Abu Hanifa the faki have the OMA his mother used to like a sauce. This guy's he's a storyteller. I mean, he doesn't know fact he just tells a lot of stories. He would be popular on tick tock, this guy just tells a lot of stories, a lot of narrations and a lot of kisses. So this guy,
he's in the marketplace. And he's a sauce. He's a storyteller, but Imam to his mom. He's like her favorite show,
or any of his mom. And so she would have a fifth question. And she would tell her son, Abu Hanifa to go ask Chef, so and so.
And he would go. And then he'd asked him, it'd be like, my mom wanted me to ask you this question. And the guy would have no idea what the answer was. And he will say, Tim, I'm over. How do you say to him? Well, what do you say about this? He's like, I say such and such. He said, Go and tell her That's my position.
And he would go, but his mom, just, you know, he's our son. What does he know?
And so again, if my goal is benefit, then I care about that person benefiting. And so it doesn't have to come through me. I might instead have somebody else, talk to them. Someone who has better report or someone who will they'll listen to or someone who they'll respect. Or maybe I'll send them a video of their favorite chef, I'm not going to be the one who clashed with them because I know that clashing with them or advising them or reminding them It won't benefit coming from me. But I don't care if it comes from me or not because I am sincere to them.
So the first quality is sincerity. The second quality
is to not forget the good to not forget the good.
A lot of times when we talk about this topic of commanding the good and forbidding the evil, um would have been modeled for Nana Mancha. We only focus on and what we only conceptualized and what we only think about is forbidding evil.
But what about encouraging and populating and promoting goodness?
A lot of times, you would do well
to promote someone or to congratulate someone or to appreciate someone or to celebrate someone when they're doing good.
And you would protect them from them doing wrong. I give you an example. You have a kid who comes to the rescue. One of the most beautiful examples I saw was one time I went to Southern California.
It was selected federal on a Saturday
Morning. So I just went to the messages for Nigeria. And it's a random, I mean, scheduled on a Saturday morning, who's gonna be there? There's a small congregation, maybe 20 people there for fetcher. It was Jeff Muhammad's finance minister then in Orange County. And that fed yet they did an award ceremony.
At 6am. They did an award ceremony, because there was one kid who was 10 years old, who had been coming with his dad to fidget for the past three months on the weekends, for three months, every weekend, that kid was coming with his dad provided and so what did they do? They celebrated him all of the uncles, they had a sheet of paper for him, they did an award ceremony, they gave him some candy, maybe some some uncle's gave him some money. And I thought that was so beautiful, because what they did was they tied his experience of salata failure, this is incredible. This, this positive memory, this positive reinforcement, so that he continues to come to us,
as opposed to what many of us unfortunately do is when kids are coming to the rescue that seven and eight and nine and 10. They're not being celebrated. They're simply being tolerated. And they're basically they're barely being tolerated, as opposed to kids simply being tolerated. And
not being appreciated, not being celebrated. And then when that kid hits 11, and 12, and 13, and he's not interested in coming to the message anymore, now it's a big deal. Now his father's stressing, now he wants the mom to talk to him. Now we're trying to get him to be invested. A girl is wearing a job properly 1112 1314 1516 1718 1920 She's not being celebrated or appreciated by anybody. And then the second some hair is showing over here all of a sudden, the entire tribe wants to meet and have a have a conversation or advisor or what have you play what about celebrating the good when people are doing good. If you celebrate the good and appreciate the good and encourage the
good inshallah to Allah you'll get more of that good. Allah Subhana Allah says Allah insha Allah as he then know, if you increase if you show gratitude, I will increase you. And guess what? The Prophet sallallahu sallam was incredible at this. He was incredible at finding people doing things right and then praising them for it. And so Rasulullah sallallahu ala Salah is listening to the citation of Abu Musa luxury.
And he says to him
because he had heard he had overheard Abu Musa citation. And then the next day he tells Abu Musa he said I heard your citation last night, and I see that you've been given a flute like the flutes of David.
Now what do you think of Musa is going to do with his citation now that he heard that from Russell the law says
you're not gonna be able to tell him anything after that. He's going to add to his citation, he's going to continue to beautify he's going to enjoy reading the Quran even more, because he's gotten that he's gotten that that statements from Rasulullah sallallahu is ended up Rasulullah cellulitis and then tells me I live nearby. He says, Tell me what you do because I heard your footsteps in paradise. Bilad says I don't know anything other than the fact that every time I'm I make well do I pray to look at us. But guess what now belied is going to do that even more Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam praises the trustworthiness of obey them in July, he praises the shininess of Earth
manual Alpha. He praises the justice of Mahatama he praises the truthfulness of Abubaker so they call the Allahu Anhu and the man of Abu Bakr and, and and and with all of his companions. He is He will tell Helen, Saudi
and Amsterdam are hosting guests of the province of Elijah is in love because a guest had come and he asked the province of allied SLM to host him and the Prime Minister of allied SLM goes to his house he says Do you guys have any food for this guests that we can host they said no Yasuda we have no food. Next house next house next house next house, nine houses of the province of Allah Salam, all of their pantries are completely empty. There's nothing. So then he goes to his Sahaba he says who can host them? I will talk I says I can host them on Messenger of Allah. He goes home with the guest to his wife. His wife says the only food that I have, um, so Dave says the only food that I
have is food for the kids. That's all I got. So I will call her sister okay, what we're going to do is keep distracting the kids until they fall asleep. They're not going to eat tonight.
And when the guest comes, turn off the lights, and we'll sit down and we will pretend to eat with the guest. But we're not going to eat his food because we don't have enough for all three of us.
And so they did and this was before the verses of hijab were revealed. So Abdullah and his wife and the guests are sitting down and his wife and I will tell her pretending to eat with him. The next day the province of Elijah send them says Allah was amazed at what you did with your guests last night. My point here is that will soon Allah Salah light SLM is not the person who's looking for fall.
Folks Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi salam is the person looking for goodness, and he continues to encourage it. And so my question for you is the people in your life right now, your family number one. And number two, your closest friends, I'm not asking for the entire community, but your closest friends, do you know the traits in them, that you would love to see them continue to grow in the traits that really make them beautiful that you appreciate in them? And number two, have you ever communicated those traits to them, whether it's their shyness, or whether it's their truthfulness, or whether it's their dependability, or whether it's their salah, or whether it's their CRM or
whether it's their service? Have you ever encouraged that in them?
Number three, the third thing, so we have sincerity, we have don't forgetting the good. And number three is privacy.
Number three is privacy is a you don't put people on blast.
You don't correct people's behavior in public, if you can do it in private. Because one of the most important equations to allowing people to become better or which allows people to become better is the removal of the ego and allowing them to save face, allowing for them to say face.
The ego just becomes one more impediment. So if you put somebody on blast publicly, then you might get them defiance publicly. And this isn't a matter of a person, you know,
not having enough purity of self and that's the reason why they're not accepting your your public censure. No.
Even someone as great as him. I'm a shopper and he says the same thing. He says that many bureaus HCA fulfilled it was eliminated Marcia Hatfield, Gemma for in the most humane and nasty neutral Minato BC law or the steamer for either her left anyway, what are the temporary file attached to bar, he says,
give me advice alone. Or he says speak to me privately if you want to advise me. And spare me from public recommendations for public criticism is a type of censure. That's not on my persuasion. So if you defy me and disobey my words, don't be upset if you meet the same equation. If you defy me, and you don't advise me publicly, then don't be mad if I defy you.
I'll just do to you what you did to me. And so removing that obstacle of ego by speaking to a person privately.
Don't ridicule them, not amongst their family and not amongst their friends and not in public. If you can talk to them privately. And then number four, and this is the last one
is gentleness.
To be gentle, to be merciful to people, to make excuses for people to have a gentle tone when you talk to them. Don't be indignant, don't be arrogant. Don't be difficult.
And realize that even as you're advising them, how much advice have you received in your life that you didn't immediately implement?
How much time did it take for you to start praying properly? How much time did it take for you to stop leaving certain sins? How much time did it take? So be gentle with people? Harun Rashid was approached by a scholar, and that scholar said to him, I mean, I have some advice for you, and I'm going to be harsh, so be patient with me.
And not only that, she said, No, I'm not going to be patient with you.
And no, I don't accept your harsh advice. Don't come at me like that.
He said, Why? Because Allah subhanaw taala said those who are better than you to someone who is worse than me.
Allah Subhana Allah Allah sent Musa and Harun turfed out and said, for Kula who call a lane and La La Jolla to the Kuru Yasha. Speak to go to the road
and speak to him with gentle words. Musa now don't go and speak to him with gentle words, why, perhaps he will remember and perhaps he will fear Allah subhana data. But if Musa and Harun are going to speak to throne with a gentle words, then you better come to me with gentle words. So if you're an authority, he said, No one, no one should command good and forbid evil unless they have a number of qualities. Number one is that they have gentleness and what they command and gentleness with what they forbid, you have gentleness. Number two, you are merciful and what you command and you are merciful with what you forbid. And number three, you are knowledgeable with what you command
and you are knowledgeable with what you forbid, you have to have knowledge to you have to know that this is a sunnah that you are commanding or you have to know that this is absolutely haram it's not an issue of difference of opinion. So you prohibit people from doing so as well. The last thing that I mentioned Inshallah, tada is just some qualifications that even okay, you mentioned that are important.
When it comes to forbidding evil,
ignore them says that there are four
levels,
four levels. The first level is that if by forbidding this evil, the evil will disappear.
That's level number one.
Level number two, is by forbidding this evil, this evil won't disappear, but it will lessen. That's level number two. Number three is the evil will not lessen it will simply be replaced by an evil that's equal to it. That's level three. So it gets replaced by evil that's equal to it. Number four, is the evil by me forbidding it, it will give rise to a bigger evil.
So he says, As for the first two, it is legislated for you to engage. As for the third one, it is optional for you to engage. As for the fourth one, it is haram for you to engage. So there can be times within is haram for me to forbidden evil Yes. If it is going to bring rise to an evil that's bigger than it.
What's an example of that? Does anybody have any examples of that? You forbidding evil will bring a bigger evil?
Yes, Muhammad Do you got
Okay, so someone's new to Islam and you forbidding an evil might cause them to leave Islam. Okay. Yeah, that's definitely a bigger evil. What else y'all got?
I'll give you some some examples. Number one Hadith is in baja de la sol la sala de Selim says, you guys know that the Kaaba is not meant to be square. It's a square right now. You guys aware that's not meant to be a square.
The Kaaba
was built the foundation of Ibrahim. It's rectangular. It's a perfect square now, but it's rectangular when Ibrahim alayhis salam built it.
So that's why you have that little circle that's outside of the Kaaba,
which is part of the Kava. That's why if people pray on the inside of it, they're inside the GABA. It's actually a it's literally like an extension of the GABA. But that's only because our Cabot square. So then Rasulullah sallallahu wasallam, as you know, when he was around 30 years old, the Kaaba was flooded.
And Quraysh wanted to rebuild the Kaaba. And they said, We are not going to use money that comes from interest or money that comes from prostitution, we're going to use pure money to rebuild the guy. But the problem is they ran out of budget.
And so what they did was they built it as a perfect square,
because they ran out of budget, and they just gave an indication that the rest of this is still part of the GABAA. Now fast forward another 30 years, literally another 30 years, and little pseudo loss of alladia syndrome has conquered Bucha.
And he tells her Isha in Buhari, he says, if it wasn't for the fact that your people are Hadith, I didn't be sure that your people are new Muslims. I would have rebuilt the Kaaba upon the foundation of Ibrahim.
So what is Rasulullah sallallahu? They said I'm saying he said Quraysh just got it just accepted Islam. So I don't want to do anything that will completely like give them a reason to hesitate with regards to the decision that they made. It's been 30 years for many of them. It's been their entire lives that the God has been like this. So I don't want to shake the foundation of their faith. I'll leave the Kaaba on the foundation that it is right now. Even though that is a mooncup The caliber should be upon the foundation of Ebrahim it is set up.
So then,
fast forward, another 30 years. Abdullah Agnes Zubair is challenging the omae yets for the philosopher,
though may it are in a sham, led by Abdul Malik even more one and m two. liveness Zubair is the Khalifa in Makkah,
the great companion of the Prophet Salah lighthouse, and I'm delighted newsman said that the cause that Rasulullah sallallahu wasallam did not rebuild the GABAA upon the foundation of Ibrahim, it doesn't exist anymore. The people of Makkah have been Muslim for decades at this point. Now their Islam is settled because McCain Islam is not going anywhere. So what does he do? He extends the Kaaba to be the rectangular shape upon the foundation of Ibrahim Are you guys following me so far? Now? I do live news. Zubair loses to the OMA yet and He's crucified at the Kaaba, Hijazi Musa,
the general of you know the tyrannical General of the Romanians
and so
The OMA yet bring the camera back to the foundation of or not the foundation of Ibrahim, but the foundation of Quraysh. They bring because whatever is alive and is debated, obviously they're gonna repeal it.
So now the omits eventually get taken over by who? the Abbasids.
And so now how to negotiate or it was a Bucha for them and so as an Imam Malik and Medina and says, Imam Shouldn't we
should we bring the Kaaba back to the foundation of Ibrahim
and Imam Malik says to him, I do not want
the house of Allah to become the playground of kings.
Every time one king takes over extended, not the king takes over, bring it back, another king takes over then another. And so for the past 1000 years, the God has been left like that.
Because one monk or being removed might give rise to another monk called Ibn Taymiyyah when the Mongols were invading the Muslim lala land, and then they accepted Islam, many of them started accepting Islam accepting Islam. And so but they used to drink a lot. And these are vicious warriors. So even Taymiyah was walking once with some of his students. And they saw it now these Mongols had accepted Islam but he sees one of these guys is completely drunk on the street, the guys passed out drunk, completely intoxicated, maybe he's not passed out. But he started advising me saying drinking is haram drinking is haram. And even Taymiyah said to him, stop, stop talking to
this guy, leave him alone. You know what these guys do when they're sober.
They pillage villages, they kill they destroy, leave them alone, drunk. Drinking is better for him.
The idea of prohibiting munkar not giving rise to monka does better than that. So anyway, so that it becomes haram. And then if a person knows for sure, or they expect that if they prohibit this market, it's gonna go away. My kids, my family members, my siblings, I have control over this, I can take away their PlayStation, I can take away their game, I can take away their TV, I don't know what it is. But I can I can take away their credit card like I can do that. And it's going to dissipate, it's going to be gone, then that's fine, that's great for you to do, or it's gonna diminish. And that's great for you to do as well. But you have to be careful that you don't give rise to something
that is bigger than it. And that example of you know, that person leaving Islam is very, very true. And it's very, very real, especially on social media. You might have a person who is doing something and it's hot, but you are attacking them in your anonymous from your anonymous account with your anime icon. That's not going to that's not going to bring them any closer to Islam. Who are you to them? You sitting there mocking them, it's not going to bring them any closer to Islam. Right? So you might be inviting a mocha that's greater than it. And Allah subhanho data knows best. So that's that's what I wanted to share.
Any comments or questions or
anything else? Yes.
Okay, so the question then becomes is what if they are non Muslim, commanding good and forbidding evil, so give me an example just to make it clear
that you really like
them?
Yeah, so Pride Month rainbow cupcakes, all of that type of stuff. So the most important one with non Muslims, the most important good that you can call them to is still hate.
The most important good that you can call a person to is Lila and Allah that you call them to Islam. I start from there, because everything else is going to come as an extension of of that belief, a lot of times, especially when you're talking about,
you know, sexual ethics and sexual norms and things like that. It is coming from a foundation that is below the surface. And so you're coming from a worldview, and based on that you're discussing your principles, but they're also coming from a deep worldview. And so a lot of times you're not able to meet unfortunately, simply because the worldviews that you are coming from is completely two different places. And so you have to start at a foundational space. And Allah subhana data knows best.
Yes, so the benefits of working
in small community,
your role as a person, easy some somebody's doing something wrong.
It's just sister would want him arrested again, man was not coming. He's gonna be here, right?
group of people up there too, and so on and so on with your friends with your points on web.
which is
the most important. So how are we going to approach it?
We're not going to everything typical people go to the
gym because I don't have questions.
Yeah, so how do you approach them? Anybody else like that? So there's a couple of things. So the question is when you see someone doing wrong, something in our community, for example, what are the ways that you can correct that behavior? There's a number of things. So number one is, number one, if I'm the one who's going to do it, then I have to have rapport with that person. I have to have a relationship with that person. Otherwise, they're not going to listen to me, why would I listen to some random person, unless I know of this person that they have of deen and character that which if you advise them, if I just told them and I told them I Hadith, maybe they don't know, the initial
Allah data they'll accept, okay. So that's why we said sincerity is so important, because it may not have to be me. It may be that I tell somebody else who says, Hey, by the way, just want to let you know that, you know, I wish that you could give your friend so and so some advice. And this is the advice that I have. And he says to you, just go ahead. You know what, that's great advice. I'll go and I'll tell him for example, right? But if I feel like this person is the this person will listen to me because I am, you know, old enough to be their father or you know, someone who they respect or what have you, then absolutely, I do the things that I mentioned, talk to them privately pull them
over to the side, you know, begin by praising them. Right? The promise of the lightest and did that never have to live normal low Can I accumulate?
That's a beautiful way of saying COVID Live. Right? Do this Rasul Allah Allah says that what an excellent slave is able to live now, if he only prayed the night. That's a way better way than saying I'm delighted that he doesn't pray the night.
No, he's saying if just add this to your degree. So you say to this person, you know, you're a wonderful brother, I really appreciate that you always come to the message. I appreciate sister that you always are so involved this this was there's just one thing that I want to advise you, if you don't mind, what is that? You know, I noticed this
cycle.
Okay, but coming from that place of care and gentleness and beauty, inshallah Tada.
Anything else? Or what else rather?
Yes. So there's like, I don't know, if it's ideal for the Comic Sans, like give your brother like 70 excuses. What is the point? Like, how many excuses you give that person where you start? Step seven. The excuses isn't to do with 70 Excuses isn't to do with the act 70 Excuses with regards to the intention of the person.
Seven excuses means that if I see if I see somebody doing something that's haram, then that's not an issue of Oh, give them 70 excuses, or he might be. But if it's something that's not clear to me, then I don't make an assumption. So if I have,
if I have,
like, for example, that hadith of Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi salam, he's standing in the middle of the night with his wife in the dark.
And this was, he was spending the night of Ramadan in the masjid. And his wife, Sophia came to him. And he was talking to her, and then he walked her outside. And so he's standing in the middle of the night with a woman
and two men from the unsought. They looked in the dark, and they saw this little loss of allied is in love with a woman. And so they lowered their hips, and they started walking fast. And so those sort of loss I sent him called them out and he said, Allah is likoma slowdown come back. And then he said, In the house of fear, it's Sophia. This is my wife. They said, Yeah, rasool Allah, we never were going to excuse you. And he said, I was afraid that shaytaan would cast something in your heart and you end up becoming destroyed because of it, because of the doubts that you would create. So my point is, they see something that's like, I'm not sure. So what am I obligated to do? I'm obligated
to be like, you know, that's his wife. It's probably his wife. But if I see a person I know this person's wife and I see them point blank holding hands and Galleria with somebody who's not his wife. Come on bro.
will lead to be liable been stymied. You don't have anything to be Mr. Solo. So next week in sha Allah Tala. We're going to continue work. We have a guest coming next week, Chef Ennis Huck, a Houston native who moved to Charlotte to become an imam. They're at the the stomach center of Charlotte. He's from Southwest Medina graduate and so we're happy to have him back in Houston inshallah Tata, he'll be here on Friday. He'll be doing a session on family ties. So let's go to him keeping family ties, a beautiful topic, inshallah Tada, and then in two weeks, I want you to mark your calendars not for, I mean, keep my calendar for every Friday night, but
specifically on the 16th and
17th So on the 16th, we're going to have Dr. Ahmed Hussain, Dr. Ahmed Hussain is a psychologist. He's a counselor and He's a chef. He did his PhD at the University of Texas at Austin. And his PhD was specifically on addiction in the Muslim community. Specifically * addiction in the Muslim community. He has a very niche thesis. But what he's going to do on Friday is he's going to do a session on anxiety and depression and Charlottetown on Friday the 16th and then on the 17th on Saturday, he's going to do a four hour workshop for us on the topic of addiction inshallah to Allah so please do mark your calendar and then in sha Allah to Allah when the registration for that event
goes up comes out and on and he's from Southern California by the way so we're very happy for him to be joining us in Houston
but what was I say when the registration for that event goes out? Please do share it widely in Charlotte data Invite your family and friends we want all of Houston to show up because he is a very very unique in his in his research and it'll be very beneficial and Charlotte data especially on the topic of addiction, Zakouma.
All right, some advice and some icons to look at