Ahsan Hanif – Quran Tafseer – Page 82 – Guidelines For Marriage
AI: Summary ©
The Bible provides restrictions on marriage, including the requirement of a marriage gift and the need for a gift. The importance of finding a good partner and giving a dowry is discussed, as well as the responsibility of pursuing marriage. The speaker emphasizes the need for a dowry and the importance of seeking a modest one. The conversation also touches on issues of abuse and marriage, including sexually assaulted couples and the need for patience in pursuing marriage.AI: Transcript ©
Welcome to another episode of our tafsir InshaAllah
ta'ala. Today we are on page number 82,
which is the first page of the 5th
juz of the Quran, Surat Nisa.
In the previous episode, we spoke about a
number of rulings pertaining to marriage.
And we said that Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala
when it comes to the issues of marriage,
he has made certain types of relationships haram
in the sense that it is not permissible
for a person to get married to those
relations of theirs and those relations as we
said primarily fall into 3 categories. Number 1
is that there are blood relations. So for
example, for the man, his mother, his sister,
his daughter,
for example. And for the woman, it would
be her father, her son, her brother.
The second type of relationship
is through milk fostering. And it says essentially
the same
relationships
that are through blood, that are haram, but
this time through milk fostering. Milk fostering is
when a child, a young child, a baby
is suckled by another woman. That woman then
essentially becomes his milk fostering mother,
and her husband becomes a father to him
and therefore her children become like siblings to
him and so on and so forth. And
the third type of restriction is through marriage.
So like daughter in laws, stepmothers,
stepdaughters,
mother in laws, these types of relationships
are also something which Allah has made Haram.
And then we said that those types of
relationships that are made Haram as a result
of a temporary
restriction because of a restriction that exists and
once that restriction is lifted it would become
permissible for that marriage to proceed. So for
example as Allah Azzawajal mentions
at the end of the last verse that
we took in the previous episode,
that you married 2 sisters simultaneously.
It's not permissible to marry 2 sisters or
as the prophet told us, salallahu alaihi wasalam,
a woman and her maternal aunt or her
paternal aunt. So those combinations are not allowed.
However,
if one sister was to pass away or
to be divorced, then the other one will
be permissible for the man to marry and
so on and so forth. So these are
restrictions that we find within the book of
Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. Verse 24, we will
begin today is a continuation as we said
before because the verses continue in that same
subject matter of the women that are not
permissible
and some of the issues that are connected
to that
The statement of Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala in
verse 24 begins
women already married other than your slaves. Allah
Subhanu wa Ta'ala says women already married what
does that mean as we said before at
the end of the last episode this is
in connection
to the previous verse, Allah as Wajid said
it is forbidden for you and then he
mentions all of those relations in verse number
23
and also women that are already married meaning
they are also impermissible for you to marry
other than your slaves indeed Allah has ordained
all of this for you Other women are
lawful to you so long as you seek
them in marriage with gifts from your property
looking for wedlock rather than fornication.
If you wish to enjoy women through marriage,
then give them their bride gift. This is
obligatory,
though if you should choose mutually after fulfilling
this obligation to do otherwise, you will not
be blamed. Indeed Allah azza wa Jal is
all knowing
all wise.
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says therefore
that it is the
that these women who are already married are
from amongst those people who are in permissible
therefore for a man to marry. So these
are all the restrictions as we mentioned verses
23, verses 24 and even verse 22 which
came before verse 23 in the last episode
that speak about the different relationships that prevent
a person from being able to marry. These
in Arabic in the books of fiqh are
called,
they are called obstacles to marriage or muharramat,
things that are impermissible in marriage and so
these are the relations relationships
that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
has made haram for us in terms of
marriage. Allah says that it is permissible for
you
to do other than this, meaning besides all
of these restrictions
that are mentioned in the Quran and likewise
in the Sunnah of the Prophet
and beyond this it is Halal for you
so long as you fulfill the conditions of
the marriage and stand in the way the
Sharia is ordained
with this obligatory component and so on, it
is permissible for you to marry any other
woman and obviously there are certain things that
Sharia tells us that we should look for.
For example, the statement of the prophet sallallahu
alaihi wa sallam that you should look for
someone who has good religion and character because
that is a, that is the way to
success.
There are certain other things that the prophet
Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam recommended
that for example the man should look for
when he's looking for a wife from them
is that she is loving and caring from
them is that for example she is able
to bear children because the prophet salallahu alaihi
wasallam said that he would increase
his umba his nation
through us, meaning through our children
and our offspring. And so Allah says that
everything beyond these restrictions is halal and this
is from the mercy of Allah Subhanahu Wa
Ta'ala.
Allah
says
so long as you gift them
from your property, meaning so long as you
pay the
dowry. And that is because the dowry is
one of the important elements of the marriage,
looking for wedlock rather than fornication because you
want to do this in a way that
is halal, so Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala when
he makes something haram in the Sharia, there
are other things that he makes halal. So
when Zina has been made haram and everything
that leads to Zina and fornication is made
haram in Islam, Allah A'Wajal open for us
another pathway and that is the pathway
of marriage. And so it is something which
is good for a person to do if
they have the ability to do so and
they are fairly sure that they will not
be oppressive in their marriage and harmful then
it is something which they should do and
it was the general practice as we know
of the Prophets and Messengers of Allah Alayhi
was Salam that they would get married and
have children.
And no doubt children
is one of the greatest means of gaining
reward in our religion.
To have children that insha'Allah you give to
them a good Tarabi and a good upbringing,
they grow up worshipping Allah Azza wa Jal,
obeying Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala honouring and respecting
their parents and doing good deeds. That is
from the ways of Allah azza wa Jal
increases a person's
good deeds, their own good deeds as the
prophet told us salallahu alayhi wasalam when the
child of Adam passes away, all of his
actions cease except from 3 and from those
3
or a righteous child that will continue to
make Dua for you. That child
is the efforts that you have made in
gaining him and raising him or her in
a way that is pleasing to Allah Azza
wa Jal. As the scholars say, the first
step
of that child
and its upbringing and its righteous
raising is to choose a good spouse and
that is what Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala is
saying to us here, everything else is Halal
for you so long as you do it
in a way that is in accordance to
the Sharia.
And Allah
says
and if you wish to enjoy those women
through marriage then give them their
that is an obligation
that you give them their the the
the the the the the the the the
previous episode we said Allah Subhanahu Wa Jalal
spoke about the issue of the diary and
in terms of how it's not the right
of the man after divorce to take it
back and we spoke about how
Allah has placed an upper limit or a
lower limit for the dowry but rather it
is something which is left to each person
and each individual or couple to agree upon,
however, generally speaking it is something which people
should be sensible in. This is something which
the in some certain communities and cultures and
even before Islam they would be impressive in,
in terms of not giving the dowry or
one of the ways that is commonly found
even till today is that you don't stipulate
the dowry.
So when the dowry isn't stipulated, so someone
says, yes. I agree to give a dowry,
but they don't tell you how much it
is. That leaves a certain amount of ambiguity,
In which case, that may then lead to
dispute or,
or disagreement in the sense that the husband
says, no, but I was only thinking of
giving you £200 and she is thinking £10,000
and now there is going to be a
problem. And so the scholars, because of the
importance of this issue, would say that in
terms of cases like that, the woman receives
what they call she
receives the dowry
of women
who would be similar to her situation, the
average that they would receive. So for example,
she has sisters, she has aunts, she has
first cousins that are married, what was the
average that they received in that family, that
social circle, people of that means, of that
type of financial needs and so on. What
would they receive normally? Say for example it's
£1,000,
we would say to the husband that's what
you must give.
And that is why it is better to
agree beforehand
because had they agreed they may well have
agreed less than that amount and they may
have been willing
to agree less and as Allah Azzawajal also
mentions in the Quran that if the wife
wishes to as we mentioned in previous episodes,
if she wishes to forego some of that,
she wishes to give up some of that
right or she wishes to gift some of
that diary to her parents or to someone
else, that is something that she can do
if she wishes
to. Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala
And if you choose mutually after fulfilling this
obligation to do otherwise with the diary, then
you will not be blamed. So the wife
can say to her husband, I don't want
the dowry. I forgive you for it. She
can say to the husband, you promised me
a £1,000,
give me 500 and keep 500 for you.
Or she can receive it all and then
she can say to her father, I wish
to give some of this to you as
a gift to honor you, to show respect
and love for you. I wish to give
you some of that wealth as a gift.
What she chooses to do and what she
agrees and consents to do willingly, it is
Halal. But as we said in the previous
episodes, for the men to come of the
family and to take that money, to demand
that money, to expect that money, that is
something which
the Sharia forbids because of the harm that
is done therefore to the woman in that
regard, Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala says that
indeed this is something which Allah has ordained
and he is all knowing and he is
all
wise.
Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala in verse number 25
he then continues and he
says
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says if any of
you does not have the means
to marry a believing slave.
Allah
knows best the depth of your faith. You
are all part of the same family so
marry them with their people's consent and their
proper bridal gifts.
Make them married women not adulteresses or lovers.
If they commit adultery when they are married,
their punishment will be half of that of
free women. This is for those of you
who fear that you will sin. It is
better for you to practice self restraint. Allah
is Most Forgiving
and Most Merciful.
Allah Subhanu wa Ta'ala is saying here in
this particular verse that if one of you
isn't able to get married, you don't have
the ability to marry
a believing free woman because you don't have
the financial
ability, you don't have the wealth to do
so, then you may marry a believing slave.
A believing slave is a woman who is
a slave and she is a believer.
If her master gives her the
permission to marry, she is free to do
so. And she may marry 1 of 2
people,
sometimes she will marry another slave.
And if she marries that slave, then they
are husband and wife. And the master has
no rights in terms of intimacy with her
and so on. She is her husband's wife.
And if she is freed afterwards
and her husband is still a slave then
she has the choice of either remaining in
that marriage or having that marriage annulled as
was in the case of Barira
in the hadith of Aisha
used to be a slave girl, Aisha
brought her freedom meaning she bought her and
set her free, She was married
and so she decided that she didn't want
to stay with her husband anymore because her
husband was a slave and the Prophet
gave that choice to her and this story
is well known. The story of Barira is
well known and documented in the books of
Hadith. Here Allah is saying that this person
is a free man that she chooses to
marry. Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala said that it
is permissible in this particular
instance. And Allah azza wa Jal in this
particular instance he is saying so long as
it is done with the consent of her
people meaning her masters because she is essentially
someone that she needs to take consent from
and you give them the diary
that is due to them.
Second
or then Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala says and
you do this in a way that makes
them married women, chaste women, it is not
done as a type of
adultery
or a relationship that is done out of
the bonds of marriage or wedlock, this is
done in a way that is meant to
be done in the Sharia. Allah Subhanahu Wa
Ta'ala says that the women who are slaves
and likewise the men who are slaves, their
punishment in Islam is half.
So anyone that is a slave is considered
to be,
in terms of the punishment of Islam, they
would be given half of the punishment of
a free person. So for example,
if the punishment was to be 100 lashes,
they would be given 50 lashes and so
on and so forth. Allah
says that this is for those of you
who fear that you will sin and it
is better for you to practice
self restraint.
And that is because the shari'ah doesn't generally
like
free men marrying slaves
because
when a woman has a child, that child
then also
becomes a slave. He belongs to the master
because
the mother
is a slave and it is difficult also
in terms of other issues that with regards
to her being a slave and him being
free and so on. And so therefore, it
is not the recommended way for a person
to seek marriage. And so generally the Sharia
says that you should marry people who are
not in that particular situation. That is why
the prophet said salallahu alaihi wasalam in the
hadith that whoever has the means, the ability
to get married, let them do so and
whoever doesn't, let them fast for indeed that
is something which is better in terms of
their chastity
and so therefore likewise in this particular verse
Allah A'zwajal is saying
if you are patient that is better for
you and that is why some of the
scholars said that marrying a slave girl for
a free man, it is permissible with 4
conditions. Number 1, that she is a believer.
This is only for the believing
slave women. Number 2, that she is chaste.
She is not someone who has done anything
wrong. Number 3, that the man doesn't have
the ability to marry a free woman because
he can't afford it and number 4 he
fears for himself sin if he doesn't get
married because of this issue of chastity. Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala says in these particular
circumstances it is allowed and that is also
from the mercy of Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala.
Allah Azzawajal says that therefore as we
said that if she was to perform
some type of crime, she would have the
punishment of half of that of free women,
This is for those of you who fear
that you will sin. It is better for
you to practice self restraint, better for you
to be patient
upon this trial.
Allah
is Most Forgiving
and Most Merciful.
Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala as we can see
therefore in Suratul Nisa, one of the main
subject matters, one of the main issues that
Allah discusses
is the issue of marriage in terms of
who is permissible to marry and who is
impermissible to marry and the general rulings
that regard that also surround the issue of
marriage and that is because
as we
alluded to before,
one of the issues that the people used
to oppress greatly in the time of the
Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam amongst the Arabs and
so on and it is very common in
other cultures as well
and it still exists to some extent today
is this issue of marriage and the rights
that women have. People oppress women in terms
of the actual marriage contract,
in terms of the fact, for example, in
our time, even amongst Muslims, women are given
a choice.
They are
forcibly married and
they don't give their consent and that is
something which is against the sunnah. The prophet
Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam said that the woman whether
she is a virgin or a non virgin
has to be asked concerning her consent.
And if she agrees then the marriage goes
ahead and if she disagrees
then it should be heard, her position should
be taken into consideration
and her feeling should be considered as well
and her opinion has its weight in Islam.
So that's one type of oppression. People don't
listen to what the wishes are of their
children. For example, if it is the parents.
Number 2, when it comes to the marriage
contract, in issues of dairy, in issues of
of who gets that dairy. These are issues
also of oppression.
Sometimes the woman doesn't really want to be
in a marriage
of burdening
her future husband with that type of debt
but the parents, the family because of the
name and because of what other people are
doing and because of the reputation issue, they're
the ones demanding
crazy amounts of money when it comes to
dowry. The woman herself would be happy with
like a very modest, very simple dowry. She
knows that her husband is going to suffer
from this debt, it's going to take him
years to pay off, but the family are
adamant.
So now she can't marry someone who is
of good character, good religion, has many good
qualities and attributes because of this one issue
that he doesn't have that type of money
and so that's another type of oppression that
takes place and then sometimes the pressure takes
place from the husband himself because he's going
to get into that marriage and he's going
to harm his wife or he's going to
make her feel bad or he's going to
demand certain things that are unreasonable or he's
going to demand all of his rights from
his wife while that's not fulfilling the rights
that she has upon him. All of these
issues that take place, it is very common
in this
general sphere of marriage and that is why
the Sharia came
to speak about these issues
And you see in the Quran that Allah
at times
speaks about things very broadly and he leaves
the details to the Sunnah of the Prophet
Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam. So for example, Salah, the
description of salah is not mentioned in the
Quran.
The description of Hajj, exactly how to make
tawaf and sai and so on isn't mentioned
in the Quran. Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala simply
tells us to pray, tells us to perform
Hajj but its description, its details,
all of the rules and laws concerning it,
you'll find the all of that in the
sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam.
But then there are certain issues as we've
seen now in these opening passages of Surat
Al Nisa that Allah
doesn't only mention the ruling
but he mentions the details concerning therein,
issues like inheritance. Allah subhanahu ta'ala could have
said had you wished subhanahu ta'ala that there
is inheritance,
men have a right, women have a right
that are fixtures and leave the rest to
the sunnah of the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam.
Allah could have said that there are women
you can marry, women you cannot marry and
leave the details to, again the sun of
the Prophet SAW
and both of those would have been correct
and okay. However, Allah ahsawajal sometimes goes into
the details to show the importance of that
issue and to stress and highlight
the oppression that was taking place otherwise.
And so, Allah lays out the law himself
Subhanahu Ta'ala goes into detail concerning these issues
such as inheritance,
such as marriage, such as divorce as we
will see and as we have already seen
for example in those passages in Surat Al
Baqarah and we will continue to see throughout
the Quran, these are issues that Allah
repeats,
mentions, emphasizes, highlights and details and that is
because of the oppression that can take place
and still does take place. It's not just
an issue of, oh, this was the case
before Islam. Islam came, bought the Quran and
the Sunnah and we are done with these
issues. No. Unfortunately for many Muslims
there are still issues with regards to marriage,
divorce, inheritance these are still problematic
still problematic
areas because people don't understand the Quran and
the Sunnah. They haven't studied Islam.
They don't have
the requisite knowledge when it comes to these
issues of our religion and so what they
will do is they will oppress or they
will be misinformed
or they will do things incorrectly
And the best of those people are those
who go and ask and seek knowledge or
even after they've made their mistakes they realize
and they go and they try to rectify
them to the best of their ability. But
there are many Muslims unfortunately
that won't even take that step. They will
just simply take that wealth unjustly
and they will keep it, or they will
oppress and harm others and they will ignore
it, or they will do something which is
blatant Haram and against the Quran and the
Sunnah and they will continue
in that way. And so therefore Allah
lays this out,
lays this out so that no one has
an excuse and no one can come and
say that they didn't know Allah azza wa
jal mentions it clearly in the book of
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. We have one verse
left on this page but Insha'Allah verse 26
is connected to the verses that come after
it on the following page. So Insha'Allah we
will leave this for a forthcoming episode.
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