Abu Taymiyyah – A Man Is Upon The Relgion Of His Friend Jeylaan
AI: Summary ©
The good and bad companion is a topic of discussion that touches on the negative impact of older individuals on their children, particularly in regards to smoking and drinking. The importance of learning the Quran and shaping one's mindset to prioritize it is emphasized. The environment in which children are thrown into is also discussed, along with the importance of parenting and the importance of finding a partner who is attracted to a woman who is decisive and hesitant to give up their religion. The segment concludes with a quote from a pastor about being a good husband and father.
AI: Summary ©
Good evening. We have our brother,
Ustad.
You wanna check?
It's loud. It's too loud.
I'm not gonna hear.
Okay.
Our brother, I guess, he doesn't really need
a a long introduction.
But he stayed and studied in damage for
4 years
with, Sheikh Mook, Sheikh Mook Bilskamp with, Sheikh
Al Hajjori and other moshay.
And currently, our brother is studying in
Medina
University,
So as I said, you didn't need any
great long introduction, so I'll turn you over.
Respective
brothers and sisters with the topic at hand,
the good companion and also the bad companion.
The brothers, they based you on the Hadith
of the prophet Sallallahu alaihi wa sallam, which
was narrated by
Abu Dawood and also Imamatibidir
Rahim Allahu Ta'ala on the authority of Abu
Hurairah radiAllahu ta'ala Anhu. The prophet sallallahu alaihi
wasallam said, Arajjulu aladeenikkaleel
and in some narrations, almaru aladeenikkaleel
faliamdur ahaduqman yukali.
A man, he's upon the religion of his
friend.
So he needs to examine.
He needs to really look into
who he befriends.
Because brothers and sisters, if you look at
the reality of the situation, you find
that normally a person,
he becomes influenced
through 3 types,
or he plays a role, I think for
a lack of better terms to say, plays
a role.
And this is what,
the professionals mentioned. And to some extent, there's
an element in truth in that.
You find that the DNA,
you also have the parents,
and you also have the society that a
person is in
that plays a role
in
how that individual
comes out as a person.
Because brothers and sisters, you know, when we
come to this topic, most people, they think
that
it is only directed towards youngsters
and pertaining that which is, you know,
revolving around
having a good friend and a bad friend
of being affected.
How many elderly individuals have we seen
who were practicing individuals?
They used to go to the masajid,
you know, they,
they had beards, they had, you know, they
used to, you know, wear the Islamic clothing.
But then all of a sudden, they decided
to get rid of that.
You know? And there's a number of reasons
for that. Sometimes you find that they're because
they are very, very rough and tough, and
they wanna, you know, apply every single aspect
of the religion
all at once as soon as he starts
practicing. Even the prophet
told us,
whenever
there's a person too extreme
or, you know, he
burdens
himself with more than what he can bear.
He won't be able to handle it. If
anything, he ends up, you know, overturning him.
So even though that's not a topic at
hand, the point is brothers and sisters,
there's people who are who are even older,
who today were upon, you know,
decency.
I'm not even gonna say guidance. They were
upon decency,
but because they hang started hanging around with
the wrong crowd, they started chewing khat. These
are men who have kids.
He's got a family. He's got kids.
Instead of being around his kids,
he's spending large amount
of his day and his time,
with
people who are true as a khat.
Maybe they are up to other mannies as
well and so on and so forth. So
it's not necessarily a topic
just for youngsters,
young brothers. It's something that involves
many different people.
You know brothers and sisters you have the
Hadith of the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam.
And I think this is very important especially
for a parent
to take into consideration
and his impact
and the role to play when it comes
to the children. Prophet
said
Every single individual,
child, a newly born baby when it comes
into this world, he is born on the
natural disposition.
Find that the
parents
are the reason why he turned into a
Jew
or he turned into a Christian or he
turned into a and so on and so
forth.
And
based on this, we find
sometimes because of his parents,
he ends up leaving a very wretched,
disgraceful life.
And not in all case, you find as
many times,
you know, someone is a very nice method.
They say,
you know, girl, come on, go back, come
on. Whatever the,
the camel walks then you find that the
offspring of this
camel they follow it there. How does a
parent expect
to
find his child not smoking when he's the
one that's smoking the most in the house
or he's a smoker himself?
How does he expect
his child to stay at home, to be
around his family
or to be a good husband when he
gets married when he himself is never found
in the house?
Or he doesn't treat his wife accordingly?
He's never in the house, but he tells
his,
his child, his boy, which has recently got
married. He tells him stay with your wife,
spend time with
and
so on and so forth.
And this is exactly what we see today,
brothers and sisters.
Even though not in all cases, but it's
again, like I mentioned earlier,
it has a part to play.
Today you find that a young child, a
young boy, he becomes really attached to the
Quran simply because
his father gave a lot of emphasis, a
lot of importance to it from a very
young age.
There's children today brothers and sisters who cannot
recite the Fatiha.
Yesterday, one of our brothers, some of you
may know him, his name is Muhammad Akhtar
Chaudhry.
Khona Ustad Sheikh Muhammad Akhtar Chaudhry
who runs fatwa online,
a very well known website.
Asha Al Malikami posted a video on Twitter
where a man he was recording
a young child who just came out of
the prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam's masjid
and he was walking towards Al Batiyyah.
He's walking towards the graveyard,
that is, you know, near the prophet sallallahu
alaihi wasallam's masjid.
And
this man was interviewing him. This is straight
after the salah, by the way, you know,
in the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam's masjid. He's
intervened. He's asking him, have you memorized the
Quran? He's saying alhamdulillah, you know, he's finished
the whole Quran.
So an 8 year old boy
is following a janazah.
He has just now prayed in the prophet
sallallahu alaihi wa sallam's masjid.
And
he's also having the Quran.
How many of our youngsters today
have even thought about making it part of
their aspirations
to go and pray in the prophet sallallahu
alaihi wa sallam's message and to follow a
janazah.
They're asking him why are you following the
janazah?
He's reciting the hadith.
Whoever now follows the janazah and he remains
there till he's prayed on and also while
the burial is finished, Then he comes back
with lirateh,
2 mountains like Uhud. You know in another
hadith he explains,
Mithra al Jabrein and Alime.
Like the 2 great mountains.
Jabal deferred brothers and sisters,
it takes around 4 or 5 hours to
climb.
Just for following the janaza.
And then also, that's one mountain of reward
that he gets.
2nd one until he finishes
or until the burial is finished. Comes up
with 2.
This 8 year old is thinking about these
kind of things.
Today, I find that the majority of us
people are living in the west today
that have been nurtured upon chicken and chips.
We're just so concerned about
a lot of these pathetic things that we
tend to be chasing. You can see that
the mindset is completely different. And do you
think this kid just randomly woke up? Because
I've seen this in the Medina.
You go to a shariaq or shariaq sultana,
near the Jamira,
the University of Al Medina.
Madness is taking place. You find young kids
who are wearing football t shirts up to
madness. You find guys
who
are just driving around trying to pick up
sisters. This isn't a Medina.
This isn't a Medina.
But then of course, subhanallah, you have
the opposite side of the spectrum.
Young kids are memorizing Bukhari Muslim.
I've seen it with my own, subhanAllah,
this made me cry.
It's really, really made me cry. How a
parent, a very well off parent, Yemeni, he
was sitting in front of Sheikh Roshaydan. Sheikh
Roshaydan
is the one who is in charge of
the most deadliest
halaqaat, memorizing circles in the prophet's masjid.
And this parent had his child enrolled in
his
gathering. See, the Sheikh, he reads Rashayd al
Muzaddith
al Adina,
you know, most of the week. Sheikh is
trying to say to the Sheikh, Sheikh,
you know, what benefit do I have? I'm
making money, but then my kid doesn't benefit.
I might as well just, you know,
shut the shop that I'm or the business
that I'm doing,
and just, you know, call it a day
with my kid today.
And he's trying, he's trying, he's trying. And
I could see that,
you know, the kid wasn't being receptive.
But still you find that there's some goodness
inside this kid
who memorized the Quran.
But the father is pushing him to go
out and memorize the hadith and other mutoon.
Shaitim Al Kalam, when you have a father
like this
who pushes you,
who emphasizes the importance of
being stuck to your religion
it's really really has a big influence
I remember my father, subhanallah.
My father was a type who gave a
lot of reports to the Quran.
No matter what,
we,
he wasn't too much into getting us to
learn
and other source. Even though he knew it
was important.
But one thing he would bang on about
all the time, memorize the Quran. Memorize the
Quran because that's the asl.
And subhanAllah, when I started going to Yemen
and different places, there's one thing that remained
with me. And I realized
what a big benefit and that the asal,
the origin of knowledge of the Quran.
When you learn akhirah, when you learn akhirah,
when you learn firk
hadith.
What it always goes back to is the
Quran.
A,
you know, seeking of knowledge that doesn't involve
the Quran but it says that's not
il means as the shawi the the sha'ari
mentioned in Alutaym in
his names of poetry.
The ilm is what Allah said, the messengers
said. And what the companions said,
the ilm is not between,
you know,
having a dilemma as to whether I should
take the statement of or the opinion of
the fakih and then I've got the Quran
on the other side. No, that's not knowledge
brothers and sisters. I shayd I realized
and subhanAllah one thing I'm very grateful about
because
I saw other students of knowledge
who didn't give importance to the Quran and
memorizing it. Because when you stand on the
mimbar or when you give dawah to a
person, you need to be giving him texts
with evidences.
Not just kalam fariyah. If you ask you
now for approval, you're going to say to
him, Oh brother, just wait for me here.
He's about to apostate. I'm going to go
home quickly. I'm going to come back, and
I'm going to give you the textured evidence.
It's mandatory
that you have these textured in the back
of your mind. Asha'idim Al Karam, he gave
a lot of emphasis to it. And this
only happened why? Because of the
emphasis and the importance that he gave from
a very young age. And that always remained
for me no matter how bad I was
because I had a very bad jahiliyah.
It's a bit. It wasn't there all the
time.
You know.
And,
I always like had this attachment to the
Quran. I had this attachment to the Quran.
I really wanted the Quran. No matter what
crazy stuff that I was doing.
Brothers and sisters,
the parent cannot expect
his child
to be
upright when he himself is not
setting the standard. He's not rolling mud in
his home.
Like, it's high gabei.
It doesn't even require to know textual evidences.
You know, Allah mentioned in the Quran,
You know Allah
mentioned the Quran. He's commanded the people to
do, you know, to be pious, but then
you forget yourselves.
You know? And then you recite the book.
Do you not think Allah mentions?
So he's looking at his wife and said
to me, no. So
the kid himself will think to himself, like,
if there was any good evening then my
father was telling me what I left off,
right?
We want our children to attend gatherings. And
I've seen this time and time again. Parent
says to his child, you go to the
masjid. When he himself doesn't go. And he
expects his child, his young, you know, boy
or girl to sit in the masjid
and listen to that talk. When he himself
doesn't have no attachment to the masjid.
One of the reasons why the scholars they
say or the Hikma behind the prophet sallallahu
alaihi wa sallam saying,
The most virtuous prayer
is the prayer that is prayed at home.
Except the obligatory prayers.
Because you're praying at home,
you are showing your children that are there
that might not be able to go. Your
young, you know,
boys and girls, they're beginning to learn about
the prayer.
And with me, brothers and sisters,
like them seeing you pray, it kind of
ingrains
love
for this.
So this is the first thing that I
wanted to mention. The issue pertaining now
the parent himself who has to be
the number one role model in the home.
Because this is the closest companion. Right?
The kid that he hangs around with outside,
naham is his friend. He spends some part
of the day with him. But who's the
closest companion?
It's the parent.
But the reality is, subhanallah brothers and sisters,
if we look at it, how sad the
situation is,
the majority of the day they are spending
what
the time inside the school.
When they teach them all sorts of these
madnesses.
They're not in our hands.
If we don't teach them
and we don't emphasize the religion of Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala to them, don't be surprised
brothers and sisters when they enter into university
and they start intermingling
with
some of these atheists
and these Christians and these other non Muslims
that they are going to remain upon al
Islam.
This is why the closest companions with them
all the time should be given more emphasis
to it. But now they've slipped out of
Mahan, we are playing we're in the middle
of a battle.
We are in the middle of a battle.
6, 7 hours, they're with what? They're with
their teachers.
And what are the teachers doing? Do you
really think that these teachers
are going to spend a lot of effort
trying to make them remain upon their religion?
Remember all this the promises is all all
the time this.
This is a principle that the prophet sallallahu
alayhi wa'amullah a zwelina in his Quran
with different wordings even though the
point behind it is the exact same,
the non Muslims do not want goodness for
you.
They do not want you to remain upon
Islam
even though no, I'm not saying all of
them.
But amongst them are those who do not
want you to remain upon uprightness in your
religion.
Waddu lautakfuru
kamal kafuru fattakoorulasawa'a
Allah says in the Quran, they wish
that you disbelieve
just like they disbelieve and you become equal.
Allah says in another verse,
The Jews and the Christians, they will not
be pleased with you.
Until you follow their religion.
They will keep fighting with you
until they make you renegade from the religion.
Why? Allah says to us another ayah,
Allah then they don't wish Rahma to come
down. Why? Because of the hasid that they
have.
Because of the envy that they have towards
Islam.
The fact that they see,
you know how they say here, a city
that never sleeps. Right? New York.
Don't you think
this should be used more on the city
of Mecca?
24 hours you find that, you know, they're
doing tawaf.
And he's Gadarik.
The fact that they see
a very diverse
ummah.
This is one of the reasons why Malcolm
asked me a Muslim, right? When he thought
that Islam was only for blacks, he went
to Al Hajj. He saw a very diverse
he saw diversity.
Find all these different people
from different backgrounds.
The rich guy and the poor guy, they
are equal as soon as he goes to
the Haramah.
Many different backgrounds, they are all doing the
exact same thing. Imagine, brothers and sisters,
won't this grab the attention of somebody,
especially if he's not practicing?
The fact that
thousands of people
in the Haram, All of them just bow
down one time.
And then they prostrate one time.
No matter what color you are, no matter
how rich you are, no matter how poor
you are,
in this
stat in this posture, everybody's equal.
So, I've seen when I was studying back
in school,
when a teacher is saying to
all the people in the class, everybody grow
everybody draw your guts.
The Hindu draws her god that looks like
whatever it might be, whether they say bakara,
a cow, or statue that she worships.
The Christian, he, you know,
he draws the supposed Jesus.
Umakhataru Allah swalakan shub dehalaum. They never killed
him. They never crucified him as Allah teaches
us. And they believe that Jesus has long
hair, it's white, and he's like that.
Bayou.
We're coming out to the Muslim.
The Muslim,
who,
obviously, cannot see. Is God right?
So everybody's joined their gods. Oh, what about
you? Oh,
you can't join? That means you don't know
him.
Is there really a God? Is there really
an Allah?
Are they with me, brothers and sisters?
So this is when the doubts gets thrown
at this person.
I one time, an individual came up to
me and he said to me,
you know your prophet? Yeah. He memorized he
he ended up marrying young girls.
He tried to call him a *.
I remember he was a Christian Egyptian.
I still remember this very day, and I
couldn't respond back to him.
So
this is the kind of environment
that our kids are being thrown into.
We don't teach them
who's going to teach them? By the way,
Shaitair White.
He responded back to this daw really nicely.
Anybody wants to, you know,
know how to respond back and rebuke these
daws? You can find a video on my
YouTube channel where Sheikh Tahaher really responded back
to this nicely in the prophet sallallahu alaihi
wa sallam. He says, The
environment.
Remember I said earlier, right? Genes,
the,
environment,
society that a person's in, and likewise, who?
What's the other one?
I mentioned the genes.
That has a role to play of
how a person,
you know, becomes in his life. Yeah. We
got the genes. You've got the society.
And there was a third one.
Parents. Parents. Which was the parents.
And because he's a companion. I need a
companion in general.
And the parent and the wife, they all
come under the second point, the environment.
Another
subhanAllah.
We see this all the time. My sister,
she starts school.
She's wearing a hijab. She's very well dressed,
mashaAllah.
She gets into yena, she begins to see
the sisters around her. They're not wearing hijab.
She goes up to the parents, oh mom,
you know, you're making me wear these big
jibabs,
the majority don't wear it, can I just
wear abaya? She gets into year 11, gets
even worse, gets into college.
Once you reach the age of 16, you're
free. Right?
Then even 18 year old, you can smoke
now, and you can buy alcohol.
That's 21. What was it? 21 or 18?
We don't know. Hashan, you're an adult now.
You can use your own mind. She doesn't
even need to go and seek the permission
of her parents because everybody's doing it. Before
she was saying, mom, everybody's doing it. The
environment.
This is why brothers and sisters, the parent
has a big role, but he is the
one that are closest companions
to his child.
Also, brothers and sisters, if we look at
some examples,
we have Abu Talib.
Sure. Every single one of us knows Abu
Talib. Right?
Just to show you how the companion can
either make or break
a person.
He
assisted, aided the religion of Islam.
He aided his brothers and sisters and he
was upon his kufr.
On his deathbed. On his deathbed.
What happened?
He's on his deathbed. The prophet
comes and walks
in. He says to him,
You'am,
O uncle,
to Allah
I will defend you on your markiama.
Say this word.
His companions on the other side.
Wala is saying to him, Atarqa baal milleti
Abdul Mutalib
of the likes of Abu Jahl
and his other
companions,
friends, just go back and forth. Then the
prophet says, Kullahi laa ilahaqalimatunuhajabkaandallalam.
And then he said the exact same thing.
What did he end up choosing?
He ended up choosing the religion of Abdul
Muttalib.
And then you have, subhanAllah,
the opposite side.
Prophet
goes and visits a Jewish child.
He walks in, the prophet
wants to be there for him on his
deathbed
because he's been good to him previously, right?
Walks in because he hasn't seen this kid
for such a long time
Walks in.
His own father says to this child after
Abul Khasim. He said to him,
Embrace the Islam. He looks at his
father.
He looks at the prophet
father now says to the prophet
says to his child,
brothers and sisters,
if you look at the punishment that he
receives,
SubhanAllah,
it's hadith of the Prophet he said,
Perhaps my Shifa will be a benefit to
him. Prophet
said,
2 rocks are going to be brought on
your markham and placed
under the feet of Abu Baril.
What's going to happen through that? His brain
is going to boil.
In another hadith, it says,
a man will look at his adab, his
punishment,
that Abu Talib is being punished with and
he's going to think that this is the
most severe adab that a person could endure
or experience.
That the prophet
told us this is the light of Adam.
This is the light of Adam. You know
how the munafiqun
going to be the lowest part of the
fire.
Abu Talib is going to be the highest.
One's gonna look at his adab and think
that this is the it can't get it
can't get worse than this.
But in fact, it is the life that
a person will
experience.
All because of what?
His friends. All
because of his friends.
Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam mentioned on the hadith
The good friend and the bad friend is
like the goldsmith.
And the sorry, the,
the the perfume seller and the blacksmith.
When you walk into the
perfume seller's shop, normally what happens?
Yani is very manifest. You can see it.
This is apparent.
Or you can end up buying from him,
you know, and so on and so forth.
And the blacksmith, the prophet told us to
buy him,
Either is gonna end up burning you because
it's in a kind of environment
which is the complete opposite as the environment
in perfume seller sells this stuff. Right?
Either it's gonna burn you or you're gonna
come out smelling
with an awful smell.
Simple as that.
So even Nawar alhamallahu ta'ala, you know, they
commented on that how a good friend could
leave traces on you.
Today, you're with a person
who at least attends the prayer. This is
why they one of the reasons or means
that they mentioned about ishtiqamah
is
one of them is the bad the good
the good companion.
The good companion.
One of them means that a person remains
mustaqim,
upright
upon the correct way.
That you hang around with good people, the
moment the salat comes in, he's advising and
reminding you of what?
Go and attend the prayer.
My brothers and sisters, go and attend the
prayer.
You might not be talking about deen all
day, but the least that he will remind
you of is a salawat.
If you're a person that I pray, one
thing that is really going to play on
the back of your minds and is going
to
like, stay, you know, settle with you is
that good act that you've done that day.
When you've been used to so much filth,
You're doing bad stuff all week long.
And, you know, you go and establish the
prayer where a person normally finds raha.
Prophet salawat said to Bilal, umya Bilal. Farishna
bsalat.
Bilal stand up. Make us feel the raha
of the salat.
The Prophet said in another hadith,
my odds of joy has been placed in
my salah.
You know, the salah could be the reason
why
it starts a
load of chains, a series of chains that
a person now enters into
in totality.
Recently, one of my brothers
and I bless him, he released the video
where he was talking about
his giving, you know, examples of his
as a lesson for the youngsters there. On
one of the videos Ikarai, it was like
a 1 minute video, very close friend of
mine. And I thought, subhanAllah,
how much this applied to me as well
before?
He He used to be a musician.
He used to be a musician and then
he used to pray.
He just used to say to himself,
I just need to stop praying. That's the
first thing we need to do.
So he starts praying. He starts praying.
As time goes on, he begins to see
with himself that
speaking to girls, he begins to feel uncomfortable
speaking to girls and doing other filthy
evil acts. And he begins to feel very
abnormal, you know, going back into that routine.
And he didn't understand why.
Then later on he had a Sheikh mentioned
his verse
The salah,
it removes the filth and the evil that
a person
is in. Sometimes the people, they say to
me, oh, my brother, I'm a drug dealer,
I've got a girlfriend, I do zina,
how can I pray I'm impure, and so
on and so forth?
The Eiffel Tower wasn't built in one day,
my brother. Things
happen gradually,
and there are steps that a person could
take, baby steps as they call it. And
a nice place to start is by starting
up with your prayer.
When I say to someone, stop everything then
stop praying. Blah. Start the prayer.
The amount of benefits that we could derive
that could have a positive, great impact on
a person's life, maybe we should do a
lesson only one day.
And exactly the same with Baha'i Say to
my son Muhammad, you know, do your jumas.
Are you ready to do your jumas? Even
though I had some,
crazy stuff that I was involved in, just
stop. Okay. You're doing your jumas. Now try
to at least
And that prophet himself, he found himself out
of the filth that he was doing.
And this is one great way to stop.
The shayid is brothers,
it reminds you of the salat,
which is a pivotal part of a person's
day to day
life.
If you want
praying brothers and sisters,
then you have no interaction with Allah, you
have no connection with Allah. Prophet told us
in a hadith,
inahadukuminaqamibisatuhinuirajiraba. Once the person is the son of
a prayer, he's interacting with his rod.
You don't have that interaction.
When do you have that kind of connection
with Allah azza wa jal? That's why some
scholars they say, once the parent doesn't have
no salah,
halal is the tie, you know, the connection
with Allah in him is broken.
One thing that's keeping you attached to Allah
is a salat.
And this is exactly what a good friend,
the traces that he will leave on you.
Another point that I wanted to mention
also,
this person is one of the closest companions
that a person will have.
It is a spouse.
It is the spouse.
Person that you get married to.
That's why the prophet gave a lot of
emphasis to it.
Getting married to
the righteous person.
Now sometimes,
you know, the beauty blows you away.
No?
Beauty, it blows away your person.
It's perfectly fine. We are all
people. We are men. That when we see
a beautiful girl, like, you know,
our eyes find it very hard
to move away.
I'm not gonna lie to us. This is
something that applies to all of us. I'm
sharing to Mir al Karam.
Brothers and sisters, the prophet gave a lot
of emphasis to it, and I'll explain why.
Does anybody here know an individual called Imran
Ibn Khitan?
But we know Aisha. Right?
Aisha radiAllahu ta'ala Anha, she was the wife
of the prophet
Most beloved wife to the Prophet sallallahu alaihi
wa sallam. This individual Imran I nahitan.
Find out more people that say Haqqan. Imran
Ibn al
Haqqan was an individualistic Hadith.
Hadith from Anshar radiAllahu ta'ala.
So they hadith from that.
What happened was he ended up seeing a
very beautiful girl that he liked.
And she was from the Kharijites.
Those who are very extreme, rough and tough
in their religion.
Like some ISIS and Allah Aida, Shabaab, Boko
Haram. These kind of people in the time
of
Aisha radiAllahu ta'ala, she was from the Kharijites.
People are like, no, don't get married to
her. She's going to have an effect in
your religion.
He was like, no, I'm gonna end up
changing her.
I'm going to end up changing her.
Guess what happened brothers and sisters? He ended
up getting married to her, he became the
heads of the Khwaraj.
He became the heads of the Khwarej. This
is an individual who had
a relationship with Aisha. No. I'm not talking
about relationship like these, you know, kuffar they
have relation. No.
Relationship.
He
had some sort of,
connection with Aisha
you stick a hadith from her and all
the companions.
And look what happened to him.
Sometimes his sister becomes deluded
by the fact that Fulan has a car.
When the majority of the people here today,
a lot of their nice, fancy, flashy cars
are on finance. He doesn't own it.
Especially I've seen this, you know, I go
to a road sometimes with Hevington Road in
Lester.
All the youngsters are flashy cars. When you
look into the reality, most of them don't
own it.
She becomes deceived and deluded by the fact
that he has a car.
When he could be pushing what? Drugs,
weed, cocaine, crack.
Cocaine and crack, same thing. Right?
1 to 3 or 3 or 3 or
the other. Yeah.
They don't you don't give any concern to
that.
Later on it becomes a regret. When he
gets trapped in prison
and nobody is there to do a new
addition of prison break to break him out,
that's when she realizes, oh, it's a bit
little too late. She might have a child
with him, now it becomes a problem.
Ayeleh with me, brothers and sisters.
All the fact that he got married to
her simply because of her beauty. You know,
brother and sister hadith of the prophet
a woman she's married
off or she's married normally because of 4
things.
Lineage.
Beauty.
The prophet gave emphasis So go for the
wrong religion before you end up throwing your
hand on the dust out of regret. Say
Methan. Say,
you know, a bara that the Arabs use.
So
is when we look at these hadith brothers
and sisters,
if you totally
depend
your marriage is totally dependent
on the money that a person has. That's,
like, the main thing
as to why you are marrying this individual.
What happens tomorrow when a new recession takes
place? I'm sure all of us have heard
about the previous recession that took place in
Britain, right, around the
world.
When
a lot of these big companies, they were
bust,
And tomorrow, he loses money or he loses
his car, he loses his business.
And what does the relationship break?
Because simply it was revolving around the wealth.
And okay. What if now, wali janaliha,
People tend to solely depend on the beauty.
Tomorrow when she has a child or 2
and she puts on a few pounds
and she's not the,
Coca Cola bottle that he was looking after
before.
And every person,
you know, wants to have,
when he gets married,
spawn a few weights, pounds.
She's not as skinny as you saw her
before, as slim.
And now all of a sudden she
has spots.
Khas, is there anything gonna go down the
drain now? Because it was solely dependent on
the beauty. Or tomorrow he's in a car
crash and he ends up getting a scar
on his face. He's not as handsome as
he used to be before.
Just the other day, one of my family
relatives was saying to him, what happened, Shiman?
Like I was trying to advise him, you
know, try and stay intact. I'm sure if
your
wife started putting on a lot of pounds,
you wouldn't like it. Sure she would, you
know. Well the same as all.
Hashah 'idim al karam,
people's
appearances change
as time goes on, especially if there's a
wife who's really looking after her husband and
she's giving him 3 meals a day.
Are you with me brothers and sisters?
The parents goes, then you have the lineage.
A big mistake that a lot of people
make sometimes they look at the mother or
the father of how righteous they are.
And they lose them. At the end of
the day, guys, you're not marrying the parent.
You're not sleeping with the parents.
You're getting married to Raquel. Nah, there's a
high possibility it's going to be upon the
same thing. But
you need to really look into
what
she's upon.
Just because they're from known to be from
a good family, their lineage, masha'Allah, they brought
her scholars, that doesn't make it automatic
or it doesn't, you know, by default mean
that she's going to be right to Zohr.
Then the prophet said about the religion. That
doesn't mean out of all of this I
mentioned brothers and sisters that we disregard
all these other three things
that
is a reason why, you know, people get
married
to a person because of these three things.
Father needs the things okay. You will come
to the jail.
And also getting married to a person that
you're not attracted to,
that could lead to problems.
You need to be attracted to some extent
that click, that spark needs to be there.
Getting married to a sister that you don't
have no,
attraction to,
that could lead to a big problem. I've
seen, you know,
husband and wife break up because he thought,
okay, she has a good religion. I like
that.
And he was just couldn't just couldn't even
hug her.
So that's very important as well.
Also,
Also,
prophet
salallahu
alayhi was saying, when a
person gets married,
you know, the prophet said one should have
a, you know, a remembering tongue,
a thankful heart,
and also he should try and go after
the sister who is believing a righteous woman.
That's going to assist him with his akhir.
She asked you why haven't you walk in
a fakhiamulay? Forget about fajr. Ask something that's
already taking place. Why are you not waking
up fakhiamulay? She's encouraging her husband
to wake up for Qiyamulay.
He doesn't wake up for the prayer. She
gets water. She chucks in his face.
These are all things, brother and sister, that
we should try to
really aspire for. Prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam
said not the hadith.
The dunya is an enjoyment.
And the best part of this enjoyment
is getting married to a woman that is
righteous.
When you look
to her face,
it makes you happy.
When you command her to do something, she's
obedient, she listens to you straight away.
You're absent from her?
She looks off and she saved God's herself.
And also the wealth that you left behind.
And I will be brothers and sisters.
Not like
the other type of
individual that the prophet mentioned on the hadith.
Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam said 3 people don't
ask me about them in your murkiyama.
And one of them is
Imra'atun.
Ghaba'anha
zawujaha.
A woman
who her husband, you know,
was absent from her.
He suffices her with everything that she needs
from the dunya. What did she do behind
his back?
She ended up displaying and exposing her adornment
behind his back.
Something that happens today on social media. Right?
Because behind the back, she brings women to
the house. They're all taking pictures of each
other
because she's Shabaz behind his back. He doesn't
know.
He left his wife behind.
I know this is a situation of a
brother,
why his wife started speaking of he gave
everything. Had a nice job, looked after her
financially,
gave her kids.
Normally that's what people want from the dunya,
right?
A sustainable marriage. When a guy is looking
after financially,
she's able to give her kids.
By the way, my brothers and sisters, he
gave her everything that she needed.
Guess what? She started speaking to her. She
ended up running away.
Her hands back. It's a family that I
know about.
And that's the last thing that a person
would really want.
And
it all goes back to that one move.
It could either make or break his marriage
that a person has right at the beginning.
Hope inshallah
these were all scenarios
that is relevant to everyone.
Cause there was maybe one
that was, you know, not necessarily relevant to
us,
but the other, you know, situation that I
mentioned was more relevant
and so on and so forth.
We ask Allah Azzawajal to benefit us from
what we had and to make us from
those when
they listen to the reminder, they implemented, and
now they
apply it to their lives.
If there's,
any questions
pertaining to the topic?
Can we,
One question, inshallah, because I've got another lecture
at start today.
Yes. I've got a brief, inshallah.
So,
is there any questions
from the floor for the sister section if
you would like to write down
any questions that you may have?
And, we'll try and get them addressed briefly.
Just a couple of points please, I'm sure.
They wish that you were disbelieve.
Yeah. What was the quote for that? The
statement of Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala, what do
lautakfuro?
Kamakafuro
fatakununasawa.
And as in Surat,
and Nisa from what I remember.
You want the actual number? Where is it?
I don't think you know me. No. If
you're asking is that
And also to say again,
the one about the Jews and Christians will
not be pleased with you. Listen.
They wish that you disbelieve just like they
disbelieve. There's all this sort of I number
89.
I forgot the wow. 89.
Or you mean the other one?
This is Ayah number 120.
The
other one.
I know.
Brothers and sisters for attending.
And you see it's, it's raining as well,
and for making an effort to attend the,
the lecture.
It's highly appreciated. And,
I think that's sufficient inshallah's panel.