Abdur Rahman ibn Yusuf Mangera – The Value of Counselling Each Other
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Smilla Rahmanir Rahim
Alhamdulillah Alhamdulillah Hamden Cathedral on the Yemen Mubarak and
fie Mubarak Kannada you can now your high Bora buena, where La
Jolla, Judah who I'm in a word or Salatu was Salam ALA. So, you will
have evil Mustafa SallAllahu Taala either either you are the early he
will be he or the Oracle seldom at the Sleeman Kathira on Eli Yomi
Dean unnumbered called Allahu Tabata Cova Tada for your Quran
and Maji they will for Colonial Hamid, where the kill in the Quran
10 Pharaoh, meaning
we'll call it an MBO sallallahu alayhi wa salam, a dino Naseeha.
One of the things about this faith that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi
wa sallam said, and it's a very short statement, but it's a very
comprehensive one. And when you look at any statement, you mustn't
treat that statement as something independent. You must see where
it's coming from, what must have been going through the speaker's
mind, what may the purpose that he had, the meanings that he tried to
convey the
context that was in front of him, and this is the Prophet sallallahu
alayhi wa sallam making a very general statement, a very
comprehensive statement trying to say a dean and nnessee her, the
dean, the religion is
wishing well for others nasaga No see her, it's wishing well for
others, purifying, refining. These are all meanings that come from
this term. The entire deen is like that, or it's a major aspect of
the deen, you can only say something is something when it's
the integral part of it. Now, one of the things about Naseeha and
benefit is that if there was no Naseeha, if there was no advice,
mutual, mutual advice, then we would be in darkness. And this was
the case of this was the case, pre Islam, if there was no advice, and
if there was not nobody telling each other, what's good for them,
what's bad for them, showing them the way of wisdom, showing them
what's wrong, the evil consequences of things, then, of
course, we would never be able to get closer to Allah subhana wa
Tada, we'd never be able to have virtue, because humans just by our
nature, we, we lean towards the world, we incline towards the
world. And what we need is we need religion, we need perspective, we
need virtue to keep us straight. So now see her is something just
by its very nature, it benefits people. Sometimes it takes longer
than at other times, but it definitely benefits people. And
that's why Allah subhanho wa Taala says, We're the killer advice,
counsel, remind for in the vichara than feral Momineen. Because the
Kra, reminders, reminders, they benefit the believers, they
benefit the believers. How many things do we know, to be good to
be virtuous, to be part of the deen to be things that we've
thought of many times in the past that we should be doing these
things, and yet, they're not part of our deen. And then suddenly
they become part of our life, and our behavior, our conduct. When we
hear somebody remind us again, it did not impact us five years ago,
we heard the same thing for three times, four times or five times or
10s of times over the last several years. But then today, for
example, it benefited us. It benefited us yesterday. That's the
whole point of it. It's a reminder, it's not education, as
such, it is education in the in the larger scheme of things, of
course, it's wisdom. That's what it's all about. But that's the
whole point of it. The Naziha has so much benefit that Allah
subhanaw taala loves it. And that's why his messenger
sallallahu alayhi wa sallam called the deen Naseeha. Now let us
understand one simple example. Allah subhanho wa Taala to explain
the benefit of advice to others counselling other showing them the
right way. He could have had so many examples that he has so many
examples at his disposal that he could have chosen from to mention
in the Quran. But he mentions a simple example of something we
would consider to be totally insignificant something that we
don't give a second glance to in fact, we think it's a nuisance.
Allah subhanho wa Taala says In the Surah that is then named by
that single incident, which is similar to normal Allah subhanho
wa Taala quotes the end saying call it num law he says that the
number said the single and said yeah, uh, you had num loot Hello
Masonic masa Kena comme
la active under consoling man would you know them? Well whom
live Sharon? So look at the way he's even explaining this. He says
Oh, colony of ants or congregation or group events.
Get back into your barrels. Get back into your places of safety.
because the forces of Sulaiman rd his Salam may trample over you,
while they don't know. So he's taking both sides into
consideration here, out of all of these examples out of all the many
multitude of examples that Allah subhanaw taala could have
provided, he provides that of an ant, and shows that the ant
features now in the Quran forever. It features in the Quran
eternally, because of the single act that it did, which was to have
compassion for its fellow, its fellow ants, to have compassion,
to give them advice to give them counsel to make them feel safety,
to give them a good, good direction. This is so valuable in
the sight of Allah subhanaw taala that he brings this aspect of the
ant and mentions it in the Quran. And now it's there forever. And
humans read this. Yeah, humans now read this at tilava. And we we are
rewarded for reading it.
That shows you the power of Naseeha. The other thing about
Naseeha is that now see her is not only for others, when a person
gives her see her, then you benefit yourself because you feel
like a hypocrite if you don't benefit from it. So the power of
Naseeha is so potent, it's so valuable, that when you advise
others, you advise yourself as well. When you advise others, you
self you introspect, you think I can't say this, if I'm not doing
it myself. So then you start to make a regimen of trying to stop
doing that thing yourself and then telling others now the one of the
things that we have to realize is that unfortunately, not see her
giving has become a very formal task. Now see her giving an advice
to others. And this form of compassionate advice has become a
very formal task and very official task. Only the Imam gives it, it's
only done from the member, it's only done from the stage. It's
only done from on the pulpit. It's only done from behind the lectern.
It's only done in official, you know, in official writings,
unfortunately, day to day things is very difficult for us to give
nasiha today, in this type of individualism, it becomes very
difficult. People aren't willing to listen, when I say people,
let's not look at others. How defensive do we get when somebody
tells us something? Criticism, as long as it's constructive is a
very good thing. We're supposed to be open to that we're supposed to
learn from others. That's the whole point of Naseeha. But we are
so protective and so defensive over ourselves and our children
even that nobody can even tell our children off if they're doing the
wrong thing. Today in the masjid children go around and do as they
play please, unlike it was 2030 years ago, when somebody or the
other would try to set them right. Today, you're fearful that if you
tell somebody or their son, or their daughter that you know
they're doing this, that or the other, you will have a backlash.
And that's why when this Naziha is destroyed from our community,
except in a formal situation, then that is where we really
deteriorate as a society. Now see how it's supposed to be for every
Muslim. It's not just for every imam or writer. It's not just for
every lecture. It's not just for every speech giver. But it's
actually for every Muslim that we need to be those who are
constantly trying to tell people and telling ourselves and trying
to rectify ourselves, this virtue should be in our mind. Of course,
we need to avoid the extremes and disregard the militant, the
militant that we're that people give, where they suddenly become
enlightened, after years of years of doing wrong and being in the
wrong crowds, and in the wrong activities. And suddenly, now they
want to change everybody overnight. It doesn't happen that
way. They become military about this, they become extremely
violent about this. That's an extreme but good Nasi her full of
wisdom and compassion for people to try to understand their
situation and try to then explain, leave a few points here and there
so that they can understand not see her doesn't mean that you have
to go and tell them in the face. Not see her does not mean that you
have to go and push somebody away from something, grab something out
of their hand and break it. That's not the see her only there are
many aspects of nasiha. And today, we need to learn what
compassionate Nicaea is where you really have the focus of that
person in your mind, where you really have love for the welfare
of that individual in your mind. Not that I want to get a better
name at it, because I'm, you know, really good at telling people to
do this. And I want to just establish proof against them.
That's not the point of nausea. This kind of harshness does not
generally work. It's about leaving a point in their mind just saying
something, just leaving a point that they can then reflect upon
it, sending them a book, maybe it may be sending them a link of
something. There are many, many ways of doing this. And the more
wiser we are about this, the more successful we will be. However, if
we have sincerity, and we have some wisdom, we will always be
successful. Now remember, things aren't going to change all of a
sudden, it takes time. But Allah subhanaw taala is constantly
recording. That's what we have to realize. If we give somebody
Naseeha we give somebody dere we invite somebody to Islam, we
invite somebody to the masjid, you know at any different level and
they don't really
respond to us. That doesn't mean it's all lost. That doesn't mean
it's redundant. That doesn't mean our act has been futile. All it
means is that you have put the seed and we have to drop as many
seeds as possible, we have to contribute as much as possible.
Allah is recording all of these instances, slowly, slowly, you've
already got a place into their hearts, when you've mentioned
something, you have not seen a positive reaction straightaway.
But at least you've you've given them the point of view, you've
told them, there's a better way to do this. You've told them that
this is sinful what they're doing. You've told them that the virtue
is in this direction, and not in that direction, they may not be
able to come away from that straightaway. People have context
that they have to deal with that it's very difficult to change all
of a sudden, but the next time they hear something, the next time
they're in trouble. The next time they suffer a setback, they will
remember this and that will come and you get the reward for this
though you forgot him, though you never saw it. But that is your
seed that has now germinated and Allah subhanho wa Taala keeps
account. So you must keep all of these things into consideration.
Allah subhanho wa Taala brings a person who is not a prophet,
according to the majority of Allah Ma, look, man, look, man is
considered the seed in our Look, man, he is considered to be one of
the great sages one of those with great wisdom. He's mentioned the
Quran for his wisdom, for his wisdom. So we when we speak, and
when we are there for the sake of Allah subhanho wa taala, Allah
will help us say the right thing, Allah will give us that form of
insight and that form of wisdom, we may not become look man at his
salon, we may not become like him. But we will have some form of
wisdom that we can help others with everybody to their level, and
everybody will will reap the benefits of this in the Hereafter,
we must be open minded. One thing, for example, some of the experts,
they say that when you want to tell somebody something, and it's
kind of a form of criticism, don't tell them when they're standing.
When people are standing, there's some research that they've done
that they don't have the capacity to tolerate, to accept sitting
down is a better situation, they're less likely to get up and
do something about it. So calmly sit down and speak sometimes the
best way. In fact, it says that when they're lying down, they will
be much more tolerant, much more accepting. If they're lying down.
Of course, you can't get everybody to lie down unless you invite them
to your house, give them a nice meal, tell them you know, lay
down, just relax, put some pillows out there. But then then study,
you know, brother, you know, I was gonna tell you something, and so
on. Don't take it bad, but this is what I was going to tell you.
There's ways of doing this. There's ways of doing this. But
generally don't just kind of catch somebody outside the masjid or
catch somebody on the way and then start telling them something
because you're gonna get a bad reaction most in most cases people
have a lot of dignity for themselves unfortunately, but we
have to open up to others we have to be constantly reflecting the
prophets of Allah some said a certain human war either behavior,
that the fortunate one and sorry this to do with salsa, salsa is
generally spoken about in terms of the fortune of the Hereafter
success in the Hereafter, as opposed to Chicago. So you have
sad and you have shocker our sad is good fortune in the hereafter
success and Shirakawa is wretchedness in the hereafter
failure. So shocky and serried right so you have the sorry, then
you have shocky. And as the Prophet sallallahu sallam said, a
certain human were either below you, sorry, is the one meaning
sorry, the fortunate one is the one who gains advice from others.
This could be active advice that people are giving him and they
accept, but better still, the one who will truly be successful is
the one who takes this without anybody telling him he just looks
at the foolishness of the fools and says, I need to avoid that he
looks at the miserliness of the of the miser and he says, I need to
avoid that. And it's it spurs him on to generosity. He sees the
extreme extremism of those who are extreme, and he says, I can't be
like that I see myself going in that direction. He sees the
laxity. He sees the sloth of those who are on the opposing end. And
he says, I can't be like that I need to do something. It's the one
who's constantly thinking it's the one who, who's constantly taking a
lesson. He's giving himself in Nehemiah that quarrel all above
Allah subhanho wa Taala says for the kid, give advice because
advice and reminder it helps the believers it benefits them. On the
other hand,
Allah subhanho wa Taala says in the Maya, Kuru ol Bob, the people
who really have interact true intellect, not intellect good
enough to give them PhD. So to give them a good breakthrough in
science and make them win the Nobel Prize, but it's actually the
intellect that with all of this, maybe it gives them the gives them
sad in the hereafter. That's what you call true intellect all about
the one with the true intellect. They are the ones that take heed
and advice and you don't have to wait for somebody to give you
advice. Somebody else is already sat at the back, who gave you Who
taught you conduct and manners and his beautiful conduct that you
have? He says nobody. He says, I just saw the foolishness of the
fools and I decided to avoid it. I decided to avoid it just
constantly looking around things.
Can What am I like that as well? I remember once I said to somebody,
Man, that guy looks weird. And he says, You know what, you're
probably weird as well to somebody.
There's probably something that you do that you're we're where we
are two to two different people is sold perspective, isn't it?
Sometimes we become very comfortable in what we're doing.
Even though it is not normal, we become very comfortable, we
justify because we love ourselves more than anybody else. That is
the one thing that helps us to justify any wrongs that we do. So
if we don't have wisdom, and we don't have intellect, that is
going to really make us think and this ability to do that call, to
accept Naseeha to ponder to reflect, and then to imbibe within
when ourselves then that's when we are lost, because we'll be lost in
our own pride and arrogance and conceit and self love. And that is
one of the greatest problems that we have today.