Abdur Rahman ibn Yusuf Mangera – Never Grieve Again Removing the Causes of Grief [Hikam 226]
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Bismillah al Rahman al Rahim Al hamdu Lillahi wa Salatu was Salam
ala so you didn't know Salim while he was so happy about a colossal
limit of Sleeman computer on you know, within America
if not Allah in his next aphorism in his next heckler, he says,
Leah, Leah killer metaphor for hoobie You're killing them taxes
and while they the Attila Mata for Kobe,
you're killing them that reason why they
the translation of this is so that your sadness over something be
little, let your joy in it to be little
is actually mentioning the result first, and then the cause
afterwards, the effect first and then of course afterwards.
So what he's saying here is so that your sadness over something
be little let your joy in every little. So let your joy in
anything be little so that your sadness over it would be little.
Now what that means is in most cases, the cause of man's grief
and worry is the loss of worldly objects.
The loss of wealth and property is one example. Nobody wants to be
left with nothing. Everybody has some attachment towards their
possessions. And
it would feel quite abusive to one if things will take off
a person. The possession of such objects, on the other hand
produces pleasure and comfort.
If anyone wishes to decrease grief and worry, he should decrease his
worldly possessions. He will not then possess the things that cause
him grief.
The greater man's worldly possessions, the greater will be
his grief and sorrow, the heart will not find peace.
Thus, the intelligent man will content himself with necessary
requirements and eliminate superfluous possessions. In this
way he acquires the peace and comforts of both worlds.
This is, I think, the most difficult thing to do.
But even if this helps us to decrease it somewhat, and at least
think before we think we need something
or even think about what we have,
then at least we're that much better.
This is the chapter on abstinence. So expect this kind of discussion.
This is the chapter on abstinence. So expect expect this kind of
extreme level. Now remember, this is how the Prophet sallallahu
alayhi wa sallam was. So if anybody's saying that's harsh,
that's extreme.
It is harsh and extreme for us. Because we're quite the extreme on
the other side. We're a consumer society, massive consumer society.
We get what we want. We have access to what we want, what we
need, what we desire, everything is available in this country.
We're doing so well.
People in other countries, they have to order things from the UK
from America because they don't get those things in those
countries have to pay extra shipping, etc. More of a price,
maybe taxes and duties. We get everything at a good price.
So we have access to everything. So this is going to sound really
harsh How can you do this?
But that isn't that the way the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam
was? Isn't that how he stayed? Isn't that what he did just really
on the basic level. So if this even helps us just to think
and assess our situation, and think again, whether we need
something or not,
then insha Allah this is to be of benefit.
So if somebody wants their happiness to continue,
then
don't ever take anything
except Eman, of course, that you will feel really sad at its loss.
Because if you feel sad that anything's lost, it means you love
that thing.
So if I've got this pen,
and I lose it, and I feel sad about it,
then that means I love this pen. Now, it could also say that it's
because I care for it, you know, I shouldn't lose things. That's
right.
And pen is an essential.
At the end of the day, you need it to read and write. So it's fine to
have it.
But it's not a last that's going to make
You so grievious and so on collapse in Melilla, you're in it
Raju and Allah will give me something better.
So it doesn't mean that you can't have anything, but it's how you
manage it. And you don't have over what you need
for either the solitaire or the durata. What Hydra demon Merlin
Ojha in our is, in a way dyadic fella, digit math of kiddo had
that accidentally.
So if you just suffice, according to need, only on what's needed
out of
from your wealth, whatever wealth you need, that's how much you have
and possessions. And of honor, you don't try to get too much honor by
working hard to get honor.
If that means, you know, trying to impress people or trying to do
something to get a higher position, you know, get a
promotion, etc. And you know, you're going to lose it. So get it
according to your need. I need this to earn a living, I need this
to be able to teach well, I need this to be able to do my job.
Well, whatever the course is, if it's up to that level, then it's
justified, then you need that much that much you need because as
humans, we need that basic level. But to go beyond that purely for
the sake of extra and just fulfill desire, then that means we have
Muhammad for it, we have love for it. So he says that if you are
going beyond the limit, then you're never going to find
something which you will not feel sad over its loss because that is
how your mind will become because that's the whole reason why you
you're pursuing these things in the first place. It's just the
nature of why you're doing these things. Somebody was asked how can
you never feel sad? How come I never see you sorrowful?
So he said, he said that I never take on what's going to make me
sad. I never put myself into that position to make myself said I
never set myself up for it.
That seems like so difficult for us, isn't it?
There's a poet who says woman sir Rahu Anla Yara Maya su who further
I attacking che and your half hula who fuck them. For inner Salah
Helmer, el Giro Kulu fossa done, either insane who Jazza be Hill
had the
solidus.
Anybody
who
anybody who makes happy that he doesn't see something that makes
him unhappy.
Anybody who is happy never to see unhappiness, anybody who'd like
never to see unhappiness. You should never take on anything that
he feels he can lose
from the world. Of course, Iman is a different thing. It comes
differently. person can lose the Iman, but generally, the you're
it's something that is an objective of this life for the
hereafter, because it's for the next world. Because then he said
that the well being of a of a person returns entirely
to becoming corrupt. If the human if the insaan goes beyond the
limits. Whenever you go, the beyond the limits in anything than
anything in this world that you go beyond the limit in will
eventually come to, will eventually return to nothing will
return to corruption, because that's the nature of this world.
Once you start taking beyond the limits,
it's mentioned that one of the kings just didn't have kings.
Today, the richest people of the world of business people
or business people.
They're much richer today than our
kings today. There are a few kings still that enjoy themselves. But
otherwise, it's really business people that make more and indulge
more than then prime ministers and presidents and things like that.
They make more money.
So the whole example of a king is a bit kind of, it's still it's
still there, I mean, the Sultan of Brunei and you know, you still
have a few like that. But it's not the same as it used to be. But
anyway, in those days, that's what it was. So, one of the kings, one
of the leaders, he was once provided this really exquisite
exotic juice of some kind, some kind of milkshake or something
that was provided in a goblet that was studded with some of the best
of
gems and stones and things like that. Lamb Euro Allahu Novia, you
know, something that had never been seen before something
exquisitely designed and produced for the king. You can imagine
that. So the king got extremely happy, extremely excited. Harleigh
great, great piece of work grape juice, you know, imagine what it's
going to be
So, he said to one of the ways people sitting around him, what do
you think of this Scaife? Uttara. So he said, he's very clearly
said, Allahu merci button Wafaa Quran, I see this as a calamity.
And I see this as poverty,
a calamity and a source of poverty, said, How's that
possible? He said, Look, if this breaks, because it's not beyond
breaking, is it? If it breaks, it'd be a masiva, on which you'd
have no sober and patients, you'd feel really bad about it?
Yes, if it breaks, and you don't feel bad about it, that's a
different story. But you are going to feel bad about it? Is it
because it's on a very high level of according to your standard? And
if it was stolen, then you would your heart would lust after it. So
you would be in need of it. You would feel the need for it? Where
is it gone? Where is it gone, your heart will not be detached, your
heart will be attached to it. And you know, if it was stolen, you
won't find the same anymore. Because it's an unprecedented
piece of work. So it's a unique piece of work. So you're not going
to find something else like that.
And he said that before you got that before you receive this, you
are totally safe from the this calamity. And this sense of
poverty, this sense of need, you didn't have this need or this
calamity before it. So you've just gotten yourself into a calamity.
And then what happened is, he actually did break
it break it broke. And the king did feel really bad about it.
Because it was quite an exotic piece of work. And then he said
satirical Hakeem, that is wise man did tell the truth.
Why did why was it never, you know, it should never have been
brought to me that I would not have attached my heart to it in
the first place.
There is another way to look at this, which is a better way to
deal with these situations in this world. That if you leave your
Knutsen self, and you just leave it to be a target of the decrees
of Allah subhanho wa Taala
you just leave it basically to go according to the taqdeer of Allah
subhanahu wa taala.
And you don't try to
confront and interrupt that then you'll be of course, this is
something that is not easy to do. But then he says that you will
then rest forever and your happiness will be constant.
Because then it will become such an odd this is where it now makes
sense. Until now it is Allah How can you do that? Says but after
that you will come to a state where you will just be waiting for
what's coming from your Habib. Darla.
So okay, what's next from him, what's next from him? What's next
from him.
But this is kind of unfathomable for us. We just live in a
situation where it's unfathomable for us to do this kind of thing.
So then whatever it is, you will take it with a warm welcome. And
you will take it with great happiness and satisfaction. And
this is I mean this is when we speak about
raw milk Kedah to be satisfied with the decree and the sweetness
that comes from it. This is the status that you have to reach to
get that
if you make Allah subhanaw taala your beloved and obviously when
you make someone you are beloved and anything that comes from makes
you happy,
and if along with that comes witnessing the Presence of Allah
subhanaw taala which is a higher status than that, then that is
going to be a bounty that is going to last forever. And this is what
you call the Wilaya to cobra.
This is called the Wilayat Cobra the highest form of Wilaya
manakala dolla uracil. Anybody who takes this up and receive this or
is garlanded by this is given this position last year as Alana
Abaddon, he will never be demoted from this state and this position
now this is heavy Sophie stuff. This is like heavy stuff about
high levels which we can only hear about and listen to. But hopefully
this helps us to intent insha Allah that state so then he says
in the next one then based on that in our tourism fella Tata Willa,
Willa tinleigh to do Moloch
if you do not want to be dismissed, then do not take charge
of a post that will not always be yours.
If you don't want to suffer the
humiliation
of being dismissed, then do not take a charge of a post that will
not always be yours, when he explains it here is this aphorism
is an example of the former statement, the kingdom of the
world has no true existence of its own. It is transitory and
perishable, and only sustained by Allah.
Do not acquire it in abundance, because you will be confronted
with the grief of of being dismissed from it. Even if you are
not dismissed in worldly terms, meaning even if you don't lose it,
death will ultimately tear you away from the kingdom.
Just the other day, there was somebody who I was about to get in
my car and he pulled up, he was just coming along. So he got out.
And he was about to meet me and he comes to come with his phone in
his hand.
But as he went to embrace me, the phone flew out of his hand, and it
was raining. So as dirty puddle on the side, new one has a lot of
these puddles. So he fell into the puddle.
And now, that's a massive problem, you know, that's just a massive
issue and you've got an expensive phone, and son is just falling to
a puddle,
then you have to work behind it to try to sort it out the feeling
that you're going through, you know, because these things are
expensive nowadays, you know, they, they cost more than your
clothing on your back.
That's how much these things are that you know, you could buy five,
six sets of clothing with this. Now, sometimes 500 pound phone,
600 pound phone, you could even say 100 pound for a clothing, you
know, like a nice set of clothes, 100 pounds, which is a lot. That's
six pairs of clothing.
You know, so it does feel bad.
So that's the way of these things. So that's why he says even if
you're not dismissed in worldly terms, so you don't lose it, it
doesn't break or anything death will ultimately take you away from
this kingdom, you will then suffer the grief of dismissal. Not for
long, though, you don't really feel it right. When you lose when
you when you're about to die, you will feel oh, this this, what
about this? What about this? What about this, that's why you've seen
situations of people who are in hospital and they're they're
honored life machine, you know, they're about to die, they are in
terminal illness, and they're still worried about their money
and so on, because of that attachment to it. So they can't
they can't go forward. They're just stuck in the past. They're
stuck in this world. So they can't look for and say forget that now,
brother give all of that in South Africa. You know, give hacia to
his children, all that money I've got you know, like if you don't
need it, give it in South Africa help the poor do something for me.
No, no, no, how much is it? How much is it right now, make sure
you look after it what's going to happen, you know, they don't even
think they're going to die. In fact, because of the attachment of
the world is so much.
Hence abstain from the acquisition of this perishable kingdom. That
just seems so far away, at least abstain from taking this kingdom,
it's just so difficult for us to do that today. Allah make it easy.
So then he explains that the Wilaya which means this high
position,
that will never
actually the will I that you will lose sorry. Any kind of position
that you will eventually be at law strong is the one that comes from
creation.
Whether that means being a commander, whether that means
being a judge, a leader,
a president, a prime minister, a director, whatever it means,
saying my same is with a patrolman, which means to have a
lot of money to become an owner of a significant amount of wealth.
Enough to make you feel good enough to make you feel I've got
lots enough to give you a sense of power.
That's what he's talking about.
Likewise, a Nisan if it's not one based on Taqwa.
So sometimes some families are known for their piety.
So you feel good that you're in that family, so you know, or
you're getting attached to that family or something. But now this
is all about worldly greatness, and so on. It's a well connected
family or something.
Or it's a family of knowledge,
true knowledge and tako, then it's a good thing as well.
So any of these other
leadership, leadership positions of the dunya power positions of
the dunya they will eventually perish, they will they will go and
they will leave in its wake.
humiliation
and need the kind of leadership's the kinds of positions the kind of
honor that comes and will never be lost is the one that comes from
Allah subhanaw taala which is to find oneself to be given a nama by
Allah subhanho wa Taala
To feel independent because of Allah subhanaw taala that Allah
subhanaw taala is looking after me so I don't need anybody else to
gain his recognition, his knowledge and to be totally absent
from anybody else. This kind of will I will never end. It's an
honor that will never be lost and some kind of dignity that will
remain forever. It's mentioned that Abdullah hymnal, Mubarak
Rahim, Allah, the great dobro, Tabby, he was just he was during
mumble honey, first time, I think he died around just before the two
hundreds around 189 or something usually around around that time as
well.
He was obviously one of those are the MA who had come from a
background of indulgence. He used to indulge himself. In fact, he
was considered to be a person who was wealthy. And he used to have
these drink parties. And he used to have his friends come over,
they used to have a drink and he used to play an instrument. And
then one day he heard a verse of the Quran which woke him up, he
was a Muslim, they woke him up. And the next morning, he broke his
heart or that instrument that he used to play. And then he started
to go and study he studied and then after that, it became such
that he would go in
into Jihad one year he would fight, you know, at the borders,
with the Muslim army for one year. And for the other year, he would
teach. He was a great Hadith scholar, and he was well
respected. So once he came to Harun Al Rashid, he came to visit
Harun Rashid in Baghdad. And what happened is,
when he went into, as he went in, he went past the army, maybe to
visit them or whatever it was, the whole forces, they were all there.
And the forces were so taken aback by him, that they were all just,
they literally just stormed him.
Like, you know, like today, you see a star that comes in, and
suddenly everybody wants to get a selfie with them. Right? So in
those days, it was a different story. So they all wanted to shake
his hands or whatever it was, and it created a massive commotion
down there, you know, totally in disarray like that. And so much so
that, you know, people's shoes were lost in the fray because you
know, people are stepping on each other, so and lots of dust was
thrown up, etc. So there was this
moment, which means one of the slave or one of the slave girls of
Hernan Rashid, she was looking from above from one of the windows
at what is all this commotion and this noise about? And she said,
Who is this what's going on? She obviously noticed from the top
that there's some man and he's been, you know, he's been
surrounded. And, you know, they, they're all storming him. So he
said, This is the acronym of Hora Hassan, he was from Corizon. So
he's not from Baghdad, but you had Baghdad and then you had Karasawa
or narrow. So perasaan is kind of the Persia and Afghanistan area.
So when he came,
he said, No, this is the name of Misha and for Assam. So then she
says Heather, Allah, He who and Medic Wallah is, or Ha ha, the,
you can actually read this better for a whole mold. Well, there is,
this is true kingdom. And this is true honor.
That without you doing anything, people are running towards you.
You don't have to, you're pleasing Allah subhanaw taala you're not
doing strange things on YouTube.
You're not doing pranks on YouTube,
which is causing people to, you know, follow you. And then when
they see you, the shaytaan makes them come after you because you're
shaytaan.
Right. Basically, you don't have to do anything for this. You're
worshipping Allah subhanaw taala, you're doing the right thing. And
Allah subhanaw taala is creating this kind of love for people in
your site. You don't have to do weird things next time just to
keep people's excitement towards you. This is the way of the world
today. You want to be good, you have to do weird things, and then
people will celebrate you. So if you're a famous person and you die
from an overdose, which is such a bad role modeling, they'll still
celebrate you and put a statue up for you.
Just because it's all shape I knew today. It's as simple as that.
People celebrate wickedness today. That's what people do. But then
it's very clear to distinguish between whether a person is
followed for their shaytani or they're followed for the law here
for their divine connection, or for their connection to a
shapefile that's basically what it is. Some people are kind of in
between. They don't know but that's the deception. Somebody
who's clearly out there is wrong. You know, the show is doing
shaytani stuff. It's wrong. But somebody who's in between who
thinks they're doing a good thing bring smile to people's faces, but
in the doing crazy things.
You know, pranks
humiliating others just doing weird things, then that's not what
you call real stardom.
This is what you call real stuff. So that's why she says, By Allah
this is true sovereignty and this is true honor. Allah MOLKO Harun
Allah the yesh, Martin NASA be salty well RC,
not the kingdom of Harun Al Rashid, her master,
you know, who gathers people and keeps them straight beat through
the whip and through stuff. So, you know, but basically through
disciplinary beating, that you have to listen to him because of
that, but this now, this is coming just like that.
Now,
we might think okay, but the additional benefit to this is the
next point. He says, Once you reach a Wilaya, like this, once
you reach a Wilaya, like this, then it will also come down to
your children and your progeny, they will also benefit from this
kind of Wilaya.
Now, if the first one is not worth working for ourselves, then
definitely the second one.
It will then stay with them
according to
the level of that person's honor, in the sight of Allah subhanaw
taala and the greatness of His will, that's how much influence
you have on his children. The greater the will is that's more
that's how much more so anybody who's Wilaya closest to Allah
subhanho wa Taala friendship with Allah is greater then that is how
much it will remain with his hola and his friends and accomplices,
people who are close to him to that to that level, and that is
why Allah subhanho wa Taala says, well, the actual Medina la otaku
mean healthy him Zuri yet under half and half, why are they him?
So
he will not have to worry about his progeny.
So there was this one scholar in India multimodal facade, he was
talking about his father, and his father would keep nothing he was a
pure example of this hiccup. He would keep nothing, his mother or
his mother would have to save up money like Abu Bakr Siddiq, or the
Allah on his wife did and this was just about 70 years ago, 200 years
ago, right. And I've actually met with the mother herself, who
passed away about probably 17 years ago. So his father used to
get as much money from the mother as a way he used to teach enough
to survive, his mother had to save up to buy an extra Pato to get
this started the other anything that was, you know, he didn't even
get enough to have an additional pot or something like that. Then
somebody asked his father one day What are you going to do for your
children? Okay, don't do this way. So don't get that have something
for your children. And he said, essentially, these are the kinds
of verses he quoted. He says that if they are pious than Allah will
look after them. Allah Who Yetta Willa Salim Allah subhanho wa
Taala looks after the Salah here, and that's what I'm trying to do.
And that's why you have the other example in the Quran through Surah
Al Kahf. What kind of a boo hoo Messiah when Harare Salam when he
went, and he went and he built, rebuilt that wall that renovated
that wall. Why? Because he used to belong to orphans whose parents
used to be good people.
abou whom outside her father was a good person was a pious, righteous
person. So even after he's left this world, Allah subhanaw taala
is still looking after the children
in a way that they don't even have to worry about. They're still
orphans, the young, but the wall is being fixed.
However, then he finally says that if you are to take on a Wilaya and
a position any kind of friendship and association that will never
last forever, then be careful about it always remain a
precaution. While at that thought be Halawa to be dieting, and do
not be deceived by the sweetness of its beginning stage. There is a
sweetness in the beginning stage of it. That's why we do it. For in
many higher Taha Marrara because its end is bitter. Come on a
burner 30 can be Coli in Robert can be dyads that can be hired,
which is the next one, which we'll look at next time in sha Allah
says if beginnings make you desirous endings will make you
abstinent. If the exteriors invite you, the interiors will hold you
back. May Allah subhanaw taala give us an understanding of this
May Allah subhanho wa Taala open up
his, his His bounties for us bounty of Wilaya bounty of Wilaya
not just worldly possessions and may Allah subhanho wa Taala give
us the same understanding the same understanding of this and the
closest to get to it