Abdur Rahman ibn Yusuf Mangera – Dealing other people’s quirkiness

Sometimes, when you have to deal with different people, whether

you're a student, and they are your teachers, or you are a

teacher, and they are your students, or they are your

employer, or they are your workers, what we have to

understand is that you're not going to react to everybody in the

same way.

You're not going to be able to react to everybody in the same

way.

You can't just hit it off with everybody. You can't just be

congenial. You can't just be, you just can't feel the same kind of

connection with everybody says natural human. Now, the one place

that I've seen where somebody actually discusses this and tells

you how to deal with it is Imam Shah Rouhani. And we've actually

covered this in a double saba.

In the other Osama series that we've done, it's on YouTube,

a double sword, but the etiquette of companionship, he deals with

pretty much all of these things, that sometimes there's just

somebody that you don't like them because of their behavior. There's

nothing wrong with them. But there's some little quirky actions

that they do that put you off. They're a nice person, but maybe

they just keep touching their nose a lot. And you just find that

really, or maybe they just have a weird look to you. I'm saying to

you, because they can be completely normal weirdness is in

the eye of the beholder, generally speaking. And just like other

people are weird to us. A friend told me when I said that about

somebody, you said to me, you probably read as well for other

people. So that's an absolute possibility, right? So he says,

what you should do for these people. And this is something we

have to do for ourselves really, is that you must think that I

shouldn't think like this, you must start making dua for them,

you can go and maybe give them a gift or something like that. And

then try to see that try to overlook these aspects with

certain people, especially if you're in the kind of lower

position and you have to respect certain people, your teacher, your

employees, or whatever the case is. And you can't just then in

that case, you just have to accept that as long as you're not doing

anything wrong. As long as you are not overstepping the boundaries,

and you're fulfilling the rights of one another. That's fine. You

can't just be cool. Why can't you just be cool, like everybody else?

Well, that's just not gonna happen. That's not his nature.

That's not her nature.

So we have to understand these boundaries. And the more we become

less idealistic, then the easier it is, and more pragmatic than

it's actually easier to live in this world. Idealistic means you

want everything in an ideal. In your mind, the idea is in your

mind, right?

That's how you want the world to be.

The world isn't going to be like that. The world is very different.

So you have to be pragmatic. You must have ideals. But don't be

idealistic, that it depresses you. But you must have ideals.

Otherwise, if you don't have ideas, then at least have ideas

for yourself. And the more we come closer to the day of judgment

on a slightly different notes, the prophets Allah, some did say that

there will come times of those fitna, so he was asked, okay, what

should we do? He says, your job is to pay back whatever is owed by

you. And if something is owed to you,

then you leave that alone, because it's gonna cause a greater fitna

to try to pursue it. I don't think we're there yet. Hamdulillah we do

have some semblance of the law in this country, at least. But in

other places, it's like that. We look at the Rohingya people. You

think they can go and get a hug, they don't even have a hug. They

don't even have a passport. They don't even have immigration. They

don't even have residential rights in the country. For so many

decades. Now they're in a bad quandary. May Allah make it easy

for them because how are they going to go back?

So the ethnic cleansing is, that's what's taking place. May Allah

subhanaw taala bring about better for them in sha Allah from this

difficulty because in the mercerie usara that is what's important in

the matters to you. So this world is a short time to live in.

Whoever Shaheed they've gone to Allah subhanho wa Taala among

them, I know it brings a lot of misery but whoever has become

Shahid among them, they are they are shaheed they are shaheed and

the miserable life they may have been living in that turmoil, that

turmoil that they had then Allah is taking them to a better place

and those in the camps May Allah subhanaw taala bring about

goodness there for them better for them inshallah.