Abdur Rahman ibn Yusuf Mangera – Dealing Infertility
AI: Summary ©
The speakers discuss the importance of finding a cure for sickness and avoiding rushing to find a cure. They also touch on the negative impact of having children on one's life and the need for diversity in community. The speakers emphasize the importance of being aware of one's behavior and finding a cure for allergies. They also encourage people to be open-minded and allow others to speak their own language.
AI: Summary ©
Salam alaykum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh Al hamdu Lillahi
Rabbil Alameen wa Salatu was Salam ala Murthy Ramadan delighted I
mean
while early he asked me he or Baraka was seldom at the Sleeman
Kathira on laomi Deen.
Amma bad
Allah says quite a few in quite a few places in the Quran. Allah
subhanaw taala says in solitary facilite one hour Abu can be
alarmingly lobbied Allah subhanaw taala then says in Surah little
calf, while our elderly Maura Buka had a sort of use of in the
Rebecca Lehmann Hakeem. And so to Bacara in Allah had been naskila
Ufa Rahim.
It's from our Akita and our belief system as a believer.
As believers, we have to believe this that Allah subhanho wa taala.
Doesn't have any obligations upon him towards his servants. Nobody
can oblige Allah to do anything. And nobody can assume that there's
anything that Allah subhanaw taala has to do by force or by
compulsion. Basically, everything that Allah subhanaw taala does is
by his complete volition and choice, it's up to him. He does as
he pleases.
Because he is a matar al Kabir, he's the Great, the majestic, he
is the one who's got absolute choice. There's absolutely nobody
that can impose anything on him. Because he is the imposer of
everything. He is the one who brings things as he wishes, and
when he wishes. And it's only His will and His desire that find
realization and fruition in this world.
He is, with all of that he is not haphazard, despite the fact that
he can do whatever he wishes, you see that things work in a very
predictable way. In general.
We, the sun rises every day, and we wake up to it. Whether you see
the sun or not, is another story. But we know that it's daytime and
then it's nighttime. Allah subhanho wa Taala is just and you
see how sometimes in unjust people are punished in this world. They
are supposed to be punished in the hereafter but they punished in
this world as well. You see, sometimes, good people are
rewarded abundantly, there's a special reward that's given to
them. Allah subhanaw taala is the just, he's the wise. And we also
see and know and we have to believe as as Muslims that he's
also has compassion at heart because he's our Rahmani Raheem
the merciful and the Compassionate One.
We he's he's actually making us read this throughout the day in
certain Fatiha Rahmanir Rahim, Allah subhanho wa Taala all the
affairs of the world and everything that he set up the
whole new form and system of this world has been prepared in a way
that allows us to function that allows us to make something out of
this life, so that it's there for a purpose. It's there to make it
conducive, it's facilitating for us to be able to do things.
Allah subhanaw taala then distributes among people, their
sustenance, everybody, he gives a different amount, there's a unique
amount that has been allotted and stipulated for each individual.
None of us actually know what we're going to eventually end up
getting by our deaths. But whatever has been written for us
and decreed by Allah subhanaw taala that is what we'll end up
getting at the end.
He can then tell his, he can then tell his servants to do as he
pleases. And thus he tells us what to do and what not to do. He
prohibits us from certain things, and he ordered us to do a number
of things.
He can give to any of us what may seem like addition and extra
compared to what he may have given to somebody else. So you may see
that so and so seems to have a lot more than me, even though he's
have a similar or she is of a similar status as I am. We're from
a similar background. We're from the same ethnicity. We both do the
same job maybe but they seem to have a bit more than we do. Or we
may notice that we actually have more than others and Allah has
blessed us. So you get this disparity in this world.
Anything that He decrees there's nobody obviously to push his
decision back. And there's nobody that can advance anything that he
wants to come later. Nothing can happen except as he wishes.
That's why he says in a very majestic way in Surah Al Anbiya la
use aloo Amaya file well whom use alone. He should not be questioned
about what he does.
They will be questioned though. Talk about yourself you will be
questioned. That's why a poet says murli Larry Bird the early Hocken
word Shibu color Wallah Satya la dee da
In zebu Furby idly, oh, not a move for befuddling? Well who will
Karim Allah wa zero, which means that Allah owes nothing to the
servants, meaning there's nothing obligatory upon him for the
servants. There's nothing necessary.
Never saw never saw. But the one thing that you have to remember is
that there is no effort that will go to waste and be redundant in
front of Allah subhanaw taala. Anything that a seven does or a
human does, is going to have some kind of response. And it's going
to have some kind of value in the sight of Allah subhanaw taala,
depending on depending on your class, and so on. So then the poet
says that, if they're punished, then it's out of his justice to
punish them if they've done something wrong. But if he gives
them reward, and if he gives them bounties, then it's very fatherly,
he, it's out of His grace, because he is the most benevolent and the
most extensive in in his supply.
So despite all of that, that Allah subhanaw taala can do as he as he
wishes, and so on. Every everything that he does do is full
of immense amount of wisdom. Everything he does, even if you've
got something and somebody else doesn't have it, or you don't have
an n, they have it. Right, whatever that may be. It's got a
huge, huge amount of wisdom behind there. Sometimes you you won't
understand it. Sometimes you will understand it immediately.
Sometimes you'll understand it after a few years that oh, that
happened that way because of this reason, had he been different.
Right? Had we not had the trouble at that time, we would have still
been in that area. Imagine there's somebody who had a bit of trouble,
and then they have to move out of the area. And mashallah, because
they moved out to a different area where there's a better
environment, they actually benefited, but if they had not
been forced out of that initial area, then the children would have
grown up there. And they may have had difficulty and huge challenges
that may have faced them, because the same kind of environment
conducive for rearing your children may have not been present
in that area. But you would never have moved out of there. Because
people generally find it very difficult to move uproot. It's
like uprooting the tree to move houses. It's very difficult.
So had you not been forced? It may have seen bad at that time and
difficult at that time, because maybe maybe there was just some
some major issue with the council or maybe there was some issue with
the neighbors or whatever the case was. And eventually you had to
move out on mashallah, then you came to a place that was
different. So, sometimes we understand these things, sometimes
we don't. So Allah subhanaw taala whenever he does anything, despite
the fact that he can do whatever he wishes, it's always based on
some kind of justice and fairness. Right sometimes which we
understand sometimes we don't, and Allah reiterates in the Quran, the
verses that I read certain facilite Allah says, Why Mara Buka
be Avila millall arbete Allah subhanho wa Taala is not an
oppressor of His servants. He's not an oppressor of His servants.
You want to be a servant, He will not oppress you. If something
happens to you that you think is difficult. Well, difficulty is
part of this life. Difficulty doesn't mean it's oppressive to
you. There are huge benefits coming from that. Number two,
while I have the new Maura Booker had sort of gaffe right Allah does
not oppress anybody reiterate. Then Allah says in Arabic Hakeem
and Irene are in Arabic and even Hakeem both things Allah is the
All Knowing omniscient and the wise one, what he does, he's all
full of wisdom. And then Allah says sorted Bacara that in Allah
had been nasty Laura Ooh, for Rahim, that Allah subhanho wa
Taala with people is extremely compassionate and merciful. So his
wisdom based on compassion and mercy, and all of that he doesn't
ever oppress anybody for whatever Allah subhanho wa Taala has told
them to do. So now, what's very interesting is that sometimes
Allah will test you by giving you something.
But other times Allah will test you by taking something away from
you or not giving you something
and you will find difficulty in both.
Or you won't find difficulty in either of them.
But you will then react in a particular way. So for example, if
Allah subhanaw taala has given you something
he has given you extra money, he has given you several children.
He is going to now test you are you going to fulfill their rights?
That's going to be a much more tough endeavor than somebody who
has not been given children. That test can they've got a different
test, they've got a test of being prohibited children. It's totally
different. If that person who's been prohibited children who
doesn't have children rather, and they do suffer, they are of a
higher status with Allah subhanaw taala than those people who have
been given children, but don't fulfill their right or don't do
the right train type of training. So a worldly perspective, you're
going to be very excited. I've got many children. But
from a spiritual perspective, there's a decline. On the other
hand, you also have situations where
so
Somebody doesn't have children and thinks that that is the worst
thing that can happen to them. And a lot of people feel this way who
can't have children, see everybody else who have children. And this
is natural human desire and want to have children. I mean, this is
the way Allah has generally made us. So it's only natural, you want
children. But if you're not given children, then how do you deal
with it? Is the bigger question. So a person doesn't have children
for several years of their life. And they feel that I don't have
any happiness, I don't have any fortune in my life, I'm completely
unfortunate and so on, then they get a child.
And that child works out to be their worst source of test and
trial.
That he causes them he or she causes them so much misery. So now
let me ask you, was it better not to have children or is it better
to have children
this child grows up or god forbid, drags their name through the dirt,
they end up disowning this child. And one day they even say,
I wish I didn't have children.
You and you've seen people in crazy places who kill their
children because they do something that they don't that the parents
don't like. You've seen people based on culture, they will dis
own their children because maybe they want to marry somebody you
don't want them to marry.
So
what is good and bad for us has to be relooked at
That's why Allah subhanaw taala says in the Quran, surah Allah
Allah wa Bella Luna whom Bill Hassan it was, say to Allah, Allah
whom you're your own. We have tested them or we will test them
with both with the good and blessed good good things. Bill
Hassan are things that you will see to be excellent and good for
you, and which they are too evil things.
So that law Allah whom yours your own, so that maybe they will
return to Allah, and eventually understand that goodness is just
with Allah is living by the way Allah wants you to live and not
with what you've been given. Because I could have a nice phone,
be really excited about it. But then if I lose that phone, then
look at the harm that it does for me psychologically.
Something you love a lot and you lose it so good and bad is in the
sight of Allah subhanaw taala it's how we treat things. So valonna
Humble has done Allah subhanaw taala says in Surah Al Anbiya,
when a blue can be Sherry, well, Heidi fitna, what Elena to Joan,
so Allah in these verses is telling us that he tests people
both with difficulties, bad things, and with the good things.
Most of us never considered the good to be a source of fitna. The
only thing that when something goes wrong and is a calamity,
that's a trial. But if we have, then we just want to enjoy it.
They don't realize that that's a test as well. Allah wants to see
us how we do things, how we react to the good that Allah has given
us. And that's what he says in this then. Allah says in surah Al
Fajr for a mill Inserm either either Mottola who Rabo for a
chroma who won our AMA, who for your code or be a corpsman is the
human being, that the Insan is such that if Allah test if his
Lord tests him, and
is generous on him and gives him things that he wants, when that
ama who gives him certain bounties, the person will end up
saying, My Lord has honored me.
Is it? Is it an honor that Allah has given you these things? Or is
it a test and a trial? Is it it's only becomes an honor? After you
fulfill their rights? It's not an honor. First, it's only an honor
if you're thankful to Allah and you fulfill the rights then Allah
says, Well, I'm either moved Allah Who vocoder or de risco who fair
cool Robbie Hernan, then there's another person that Allah tests.
So what he does is that he restricts certain that you
withhold certain things, he constraints things on them,
doesn't give it to them his sustenance. And then the person
says, God has forsaken me, God has humiliated me. God has not looked
after me. So is that really what it's all about? So Allah is
saying, This is how humans are. If you they see that you're getting
something extra you think God has honored you, but is he really
honoring you in giving you that? And then if you don't get
something and Allah restricts his sustenance from us, we think God
has forsaken us is that the true thing? Is that really, and I
guarantee you most people think this way. When we get with
Alhamdulillah we thank we thank Allah and that's good. If you're
thanking Allah, it's good.
Everybody that Allah subhanho wa Taala seems to be giving things to
doesn't mean that he has honored them and anybody and everybody
that Allah subhanaw taala has taken things away from doesn't
mean that Allah has forsaken them. But this these are both tests to
see that does this person do sugar? And does that person do
Sobor
and that is really
What is
the goodness from Allah subhanaw taala that he gives us the ability
to deal with the both both situations in the correct manner.
That's why my topic today, after building up this introduction is
purely about people who can't have children.
Because as I said, That's a massive test. It's a big challenge
from all perspectives. Because not only are you going to be feeling
bad about this most likely, but you're going to be for the rest of
your life being questioned about when are you gonna have children?
Why don't you have children? Aren't you trying hard enough
Subhan Allah, as though it's something like just baking some
bread in the morning or something.
So, for such a person, I want to explain that this is nirvana. This
is the Nirvana of Allah subhanaw taala, maybe his withheld this
from you, because that's how he wants to benefit you.
And he wants and you can still make this and still gain a higher
position maybe than other people who actually have children, you
may be faring better, just depends on how you react. That's why for
any person who doesn't have children, it doesn't mean that you
must just sit back and think I will never have children, you can
continue to ask Allah subhanaw taala. And that's what I would
have mentioned, what? How should we deal with Allah subhanaw taala
in the sense of what should we be doing? And number two, how should
we deal with people? That's really what I want, because I get a
series of
questions about this. And there's a lot of people who are in a huge
amount of misery, because they don't know how to react in this
case, they don't know how to deal with this case. And it's our
responsibility to try to help. The first and foremost, we need to pay
full attention to Allah subhanho wa taala. Keep asking him that,
oh, Allah remove this infertility from me, remove this, this
blockage from me, allow me to have children allow me to have
children, you should never become despondent, even if you've been
told that you will never have children. You should never become
despondent because Allah subhanaw taala, you know, the ivam of what
they may say that, Oh, it's because you can't produce this,
these eggs or you you don't have this. So you don't have that.
There's various different medical issues that come about, which can
contribute to this issue. And sometimes there is no medical
issue. It's just gonna take time. And there's a lot of people who
have said that it's when I gave up trying that that's when I got my
child. This is all to show that it's not in your hands. It is not
in your hands, maybe you with your tension with your problems,
because you're not managing it. Maybe that's why you're
restricting your system because psychology has a massive impact on
the way our bodies function. Right? We can make ourselves ill
by thinking evil thoughts, and we can make ourselves feeling better.
By having fresh, great lively revived revivalist ideas. And you
can you can do so much more. If you look in history, you had
Ibrahim Ali Salam, he was about 70 years old. Today. Imagine anybody
at the age of 70 having a child that's a miracle on its own, even
today. He has a child at that age sobre la has Salam his wife did
not have a chat then Zachary Alliston his story is mentioned in
the Quran in the most wonderful way Allah subhanaw taala says in
Surah Surah Maryam
Zachary Allah Islam is saying Rob be he is calling to his Lord right
Rob be in any one of the mini wash their Elara sushi Shaybah one a
couldn't be more eco rubbish IKEA. He's telling us how to ask. He's
saying look, I've got all the excuses. I understand. My bones
they've they've become worn out they become weak. My hair. You
know, you can tell that I've got old age on me because my hair is
all gray or white. But I don't want to be deprived of your doors.
I don't want to be one of those who are deprived by your door so
he asks Allah so Allah subhanaw taala responds to him and says
yes, the courier in an Uber Shirakami hola Amin is smooth
Yeah, hiya lemenager Allahu Inca blue Serbia. We're gonna give you
a child we've given you the glad tidings of this wonderful yeah
whose name is going to be yeah here never made anybody like him
before in his name and never had never had that before.
So early Imran Allah subhanaw taala this is this is another time
to Allah subhanaw taala speaks about this is the karate Psalm
says Rob be heavily militant Calgary yet until yerba in
Nicosia, Mira Dora
Oh my Lord, grant me from yourself. A righteous progeny.
An excellent progeny a pure progeny.
Because in the Kissimmee or dua because you listen to do hours you
respond to prayers. So Allah subhanaw taala then says in the
Quran for now that will Mala Iike the angels they announced to him
they call out to him what who are called him
When you suddenly feel Merab while he's standing there praying in his
niche of prayer, and Allah you Bashira cubby area, Allah gives
you the glad tidings of your highlight of your here.
You can tell with all of this that he is in a particular state he's
asking Allah, right so because everything is in the hands of
Allah, its sustenance to be given to be given children, then sort of
inserted Ambia Allah subhanaw taala says was that Korea is now
the robber who robbed Bella terroni further than one the
Hyrule worry theme.
When he calls out to his Lord Zachary, Allison, when he calls
out to his Lord, that Oh my Lord, do not leave me single, do not
leave me alone, isolated, meaning without a progeny. And you're the
one you're the best of those who can give,
who can give, inheritors, who can give people who can give people
children to leave behind after them. First the job nada. Allah
says, We responded to him. We answered his call, or have an
Allahu Yahia.
And we gave him yeah, here was Lana Allah Who Zoda we, we made
his wife better his spouse, we basically killed her to be able to
have children. Because see, in all of these, Allah says this three
times in the Quran, the story can only need to say once, but he
knows that there's going to be people with this challenge. He
wants them to take a benefit from this so he says in the home
Colonel, you said your owner Phil Hyatts that they were people who
would really
vie with each other they were really make haste in in doing good
things were their own and Raha barraba And they would call out to
us they would make to our to us and they would pray to us, both.
In great in great humility, and in great art and fear, what can we
learn are harsher in and they were, they were in awe and they
were fearful of us. That is the state a person needs when they
want to make dua for something like that. Have you made that kind
of dua to Allah subhanaw taala, some of worldly from a worldly
perspective, right? There's going to be many people who are going to
have this issue or challenge of having children. But remember
Allah subhanaw taala has everything in his control. And
that's why it is a very interesting thing that Allah
subhanaw taala has mentioned here. In the beginning of sort of Miriam
Gaff.
I saw the karate Rob Baker either who's Korea is now the robber who
needs
half a year.
The raw material Baker Abdur, who's a Korea
remember the
Mercy of your Lord.
When his servant Zachary called out to him?
Either who he didn't say, is Victor or Mati Rob Baker Nabhi yoo
hoo Zakaria. Because from this he wanted to show that anybody who's
a slave of Allah, this is for that person. This is not something
specific was a curiosity Sam, this can happen to anybody. And today
you can see in the world, there are people having children at
older ages, it's absolute possibility.
So while the by the door, be regular on your doors, be regular
on your doors, especially tried to find the times of day times of the
week, the places where the hours are accepted. Because DA is going
to be your best day watch this. You can take as much medicine as
you want, have as much treatment for fertility as you want. But DHA
is going to be the greatest thing because most people have they have
children without treatment. So that must be the case that it's in
the hands of Allah subhanaw taala call on to Allah subhanho wa Taala
with the Ismaila Hill album, your Allah. Other opinions AR Rahman AR
Rahim, Yohanan, Yamuna, Nan La Ilaha illa Allah Subhana Allah in
the consuming of Valley mean, yeah, how you yaka you, these are
all possibilities, use the 99 names to pray to Allah subhanaw
taala. But just don't rush, because you can't do anything
about this. There's nothing physically more you can do as long
as you do what you're supposed to do. That's all you're supposed to
do. While attacking that and do not do not be despondent.
But know that Allah subhanho wa Taala Inshallah, we're going to
respond to you Allah says we're either solitary by the need for a
new Corrib when My servants asked about me, then tell them that I'm
close. Would you Would that with a dare either Dan, I respond to
those who call upon me when they call upon me. Fall Yes, the G
booty so they should call upon me. Well, you mean who will be
they should seek a response from me by by calling onto me. And they
should believe in me, let alone your shadows so that they maybe
they can get guidance. Allah says in surah Tao sutra Bacara surah.
Al Horford Allah says wakad or Abu Musa Rooney as the Gibler
you will
God says call upon me and I will respond to you.
So first is do Ah, of course you try, but you do do ah and number
two you do abundant so far because it's still far removal of sins,
seeking forgiveness for sins, opens up the pathway, the
blockage, it removes the blockage, it removes hindrances, it removes
the obstacles, and maybe it's something in our life we don't
know we just want to eliminate all obstacles. So do lots of SFR
because this is to do so far as has been mentioned in the Quran is
actually the source of gaining huge rewards. A person came to us
and bossy Rahim Allah I can't have children. He says it's takfiri
ALLAH, seek forgiveness in Allah. Because Allah says in Surah Noor
for call to start with your aura back home, in the WHO CAN Allah
Ferrara, your silly sama on a committed aura where you did can
be someone who Abedeen and it carries it carries on that
seek forgiveness from your Lord because He is the oft forgiving,
he will allow the skies to shower in abundance upon you, He will
send the water in abundance upon you. And he will then assist you
extend to you, children Bonnin children
and wealth is still far is the second thing you do. Then after
that, you take as much medicine as you can find, meaning you go and
try to find a cure. But along with that, what we have to understand
is that Allah subhanho wa Taala says,
the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said in a hadith of Sahih
Muslim li colada in the world,
every sickness, there is a cure for there's a cure for every
sickness, this is a sickness. Right? So there's a cure for every
sickness for either or SI ba da da Barry, Allah He is the ritual when
you get the right Dawa and cure to come together with the problem
with the sickness or the illness. Then Allah subhana wa Tada with
with the permission of Allah subhanaw taala, it will become
better, we need to find a cure, we're going to be looking for a
cure, if you want to cure
one of along with the conventional medicine and along with the
conventional tests and trials and other exercises that you may be
given, do all of that. But along with that, don't forget the sooner
forms of cure. I'm telling you this that sometimes, you know, if
I'm if I feel I'm about to get an allergy, or if I feel that I'm
getting some kind of ache somewhere, right. But since I've
started doing this, I've noticed the benefits. I'm about to get an
allergy I've got some other issue, I will put my hand as the
Professor lorrison has said and start reading the door at least
seven times, Allah humara bananas and hibel buts wish we and the
Chef de la Shiva in LA she felt her because she felt and now
you're either a sacrament. I remember I was in hajj two years
ago, and I did not want to become sick and ill like I wanted I just
didn't want anything. Every time I could feel something coming along
a cold or cough a sore throat or whatever. I was obviously taking
my medicines and things like this as well. But every time I made
sure that I put my hand there and I made the dua to Allah subhanaw
taala sometimes you got a stomachache, you put your hand
there with full Yaqeen and you read this to our it has benefited
usually otherwise it also would never have said it. This is the
one thing we don't do. Well I make dua but the way that the specific
way the promise has been has told us to do things we don't do that.
Allah so Hannah, so aside from doing those things, the other
thing is also to use what the professor has has considered there
to be curing.
So for example, there is a character Quran reciting the Quran
is a sense of a cure because in the Quran when Luna zero in Al
Quran the man who has Shiva on well Rama to limit meaning. We
have revealed of the Quran that which is a cure and it's also
mercy for the believers. read Quran read shorter fattier read
other parts of the Quran is read the Quran as a Shiva as well. It
will give you Shiva many things, straighten our minds out in terms
of how you must think about this as well.
And
try to go to Makkah Makara Rama, Madina, Munawwara go for Umrah go
for Hajj, if you can do so. Go and drink a lot of Zamzam water
because zum zum has Shiva zum zum has the ability to when you drink
it Allah subhanaw taala responds to your doors then recite Fatiha
Turkey, the 32 kita which is Surah Fatiha because so the fattier
shifa read Surah Fatiha with Zamzam water when you drink it
huge amounts of benefits and other things take black seed black seed
oil black seed black see tell us however you want to do it and
honey. These are the what we would call it Islamic. The water was
mentioned in the Quran and the Hadith as to what has sunnah. So
take some of that. Don't leave anything unturned. I'm saying Do
what you can, aside from the conventional medicine, do all of
these things as well you don't know
In which of these the Shiva and your cure has been written, so it
is a wisdom in everything.
Now,
if it's taking too long for you, you obviously need some kind of
comfort, you need some kind of satisfaction to be able to deal
with this. So what you have to understand is that at the end of
the day, it's up to Allah subhanaw taala. Anything he does whatever
he does, there's a wisdom behind it. Don't rush him. There are so
many people who will only get children after while Allah
subhanaw taala says Allah he will go somewhere it will not. He has
the kingdom, sovereignty of the heavens and earth, young love your
local nyesha He creates whatever He wishes. And then he says, you
humbly mean your shirt or in earth and we are humbly man your shirt
with the cool. He gives whomever he wishes he gives them boys,
whoever he wishes he gives them girls. In fact, he mentioned first
he gives girls to whomever he wishes. And then he gives boys to
whomever he wishes, oh user, which is the chronoa In other words,
your own Romania show or Akima. But then there's some people who
will make them infertile, they won't have children. There are
some people like that in the Holleyman Kadir, Allah subhanaw.
Taala is well aware of everything, and He has power to do whatever he
wants. That may be the case with you that you may not have
children. You may Allah may not have written children for you can
try. But it may be the case as well. So don't think that if I
don't have a child, that means that's the end of my life. No,
just be thankful that you're here. And that you can work for
Paradise. That is probably more important. Allah was satisfied
you're in paradise. Go and adopt children, if you have to go and
foster children. There's so many ways to have children and to show
your love and affection. Yes, it'd be nice to have your own children.
We must thank Allah those who do have children. But at the end of
the day, if he's not going to get it, you can't produce one.
yourself. Allah subhanaw taala says Allah Who Yeah, and the more
into military, the moon. Allah knows you don't know what's really
good for you. La dasa boo Sharon, lecom, Balu, Haydn, la Consolata.
Nora, don't think that whatever is wrong has happened or whatever the
situation is. Don't think that is evil for you, but it could be good
for you.
The aroma they've looked at, sober
and the way to deal with things.
One of one of them said, one of the ways people said you have the
mayor matola here I take a FEMA Takara of Minette Metallica, FEMA
to hip.
Allah's giving you a bounty in the form of something you dislike is
actually superior than him giving you the bounty in the form of
something you do like.
What does that mean? That means that something happens to you,
which you don't like, that's, he's calling that a bounty. And there
may be greater goodness in that because it's going to protect you
if you had it, it would cause you problems. Or that if you don't
have it, and you do Saba is going to shoot you up in the sight of
Allah subhanaw taala then if you did have it, because then you
become more relaxed about things, or Eisah into crochet and Ohioan
LUCAM and maybe you dislike something but it actually there's
goodness in it. And that's why another great sage said it'll not
only love if he Jimmy Maya Lubich you need to be remain you need to
remain satisfied with Allah in everything that he does with you
for in Houma mana aka Illa eurotek. He's only withholding
something from you because he wants to give you meaning by
withholding from you. He wants to show His mercy and He wants to
elevate your status. He wants to reward you by that and he knows if
you have this is gonna cause you issues.
Well up Tada Illa, you are thick. It tests you with something, it's
only because he wants to give you wellbeing afterwards. Well are
Amarok OLALIA Shrek, and if he gives you sickness, then he wants
to give you a cure. Afterwards Wallah America in LA New York. And
if he's going to give you a death, then it's because he's going to
give you life afterwards. There's always something that comes about
afterwards for IACA and to Farik. A reader and who thought of a tie
in for Tesco to me and I II don't even for the blink of an eye. Move
away from being satisfied with his decree. Otherwise you will drop
from His sight
as a friend that I have
in another country, he got married. He wasn't very, he wasn't
very practicing. He used to come home and just from work and just
watch Indian movies is originally from Bangladesh but is in America.
And he got married to live as a co worker. I don't know how they
hooked up but he got married to a an American woman who was
Christian. Like he was an immigrant and she was a American
born and bred. So he got married. And she used to be more. She used
to be more practicing than he was. She used to read her Bible he
would be watching his Indian movies. Right.
And
I think it was after seven or eight or nine he didn't they
couldn't have children didn't
Children in one day what happened is he gets a knock on his door,
our you know, wonderful legal brothers they come and mashallah
they managed to convince him and he changes. And he becomes much
more practicing when his wife sees him practice, she uses a massive
change, she becomes a Muslim. And then after that they start having
children. And now I mean, the last time that I remember they had five
or six children.
Allah gives things at the right time. So if they had children
earlier on God knows what they would have been doing at that
time, because it would have been really confusing for the children,
Christian mother, Muslim father, who was not very practicing and so
on so forth. More than that Shabbat itand we Rahim Allah, He
had two wives. And none of them had children. He didn't leave
behind any children Subhanallah great man like that. He's got two
wives. So a lot of people they think if I get married, again,
will happen. But sometimes the problem is that with them
sometimes, not to say that they can't, you know, I mean, they can
if they want to, but that's not always the answer. Right? It can
be an answer, but that's not always the answer. People stress
about it a lot. And there's huge amounts of problem that haven't
looked at the Prophet sallallahu sallam. He, none of his wives had
children. With him, meaning he didn't have children, except with
Khadija the hola Juana and then with Maria keep T or the hola
Juana. Other the other than that with the rest, there were no
children that survived at least, there's no children, I showed the
hola Juana didn't have children either. So
we have to understand that this is the norm of Allah subhanho wa
Taala in the world, that sometimes that is what just happens, you may
be thinking that happiness is in having children, but maybe Allah
knows, otherwise, he gives you children. And then after that,
you're, you get so miserable for the rest of your life. There's so
many people, we may even know that past their whole lives doing great
things for people, they don't have children, right? They Allah has
just made their calling elsewhere, they use the time to do other
things. Or maybe they adopt children. I know people like that
I've got friends who have adopted children, because they can't have
their own children, and they're quite happy with it. They're quite
happy with that situation, because you have to learn to live with it.
Now, while I've mentioned all of these things, the one thing that I
want to now speak about is people who do who can't have children,
how do they deal with the questions that are going to come
about?
So they're gonna get questions like, what are you waiting for?
Isn't it time to get pregnant yet? Like, have you? Are you trying to
have children? Or are you guys like using contraception or
something like that? Right? Are you still on the pill or something
like that, it gets very hurtful. Now, there's two issues here.
Number one, we should be sensitive to people who don't have children.
And while we may be asking you with all concern and compassion,
because it's the normal kind of thing that everybody wants, they
get married, and they talk about children, right? We need to take
cues from the way they may react, and try to be nice about it.
Because it's very painful. It's very difficult. The worst part is
when it's the in laws who are attacking this daughter in law for
not being able to have children. Maybe the problem is with the
husband, sometimes they do test and they say it's actually the
woman. It's not the husband, he's fine, right? Maybe that's the
case. But regardless of that, worse still is when she has a
daughter, for example, and she can't have a son, but she doesn't
have a son 12345. Hopefully the next time the next time the next
time. I mean, I've had a case, as somebody emailed me, I think she
was pregnant, she was going to be due very soon, she had several
girls already. So please make dua because if I have another girl, I
am my mind, they're gonna they're gonna kill me or something. Maybe
not literally kill me. But some people go through so much
pressure, why can't all of these people start asking the life
they're really concerned, you can't put it on a woman to design
a baby for them, right the way they want it. It's just really
ridiculous. But then some people are so sensitive about this, that
they actually make it more miserable for themselves. Now I
know that they're in a massive predicament is very difficult. But
I think they're going to just have to learn
to have a bit more thicker skin, they have to understand that most
people that will ask them will ask them with a genuine for a genuine
purpose. It's the it's the society, it is the convention in
society. It's the habit, the custom for people, to want to
children, for others, to inquire about children, you're going to
get those questions. If you're going to get upset every time
somebody asks you that you're going to get a lot of things to be
upset about. It's just the normal community. You can't change
everybody in the world. Just think about it. You can't change the
1000s of people you're going to meet. Otherwise you're going to
stop meeting people. You just can't do it. That question is
going to come up just find the best way to dissolve to to resolve
it the best the best way to actually answer it. This happens a
lot when one of the one of the other questions is sometimes you
get converts, right they come to a kind of very ethnic Masjid. That's
a good yachtie Masjid an Arab Masjid a Pakistani masjid or
Somali Masjid
And they feel that nobody's welcoming them. Now what we have
to understand is that while people should be welcoming, and it's our
responsibility to be welcoming, but generally when it comes to
bigger communities, there's people getting going in and out all the
time. Hardly anybody knows each other, as few people know each
other people generally only get to inclined towards those they know.
So sometimes people like that, who are from a different background,
when they come to a mercy or a different bank, and they see
everybody speaking their own language, feel really upset, but
take it out of your mind that they're doing it to spite you.
They're not most people aren't doing that. This is not a
conspiracy against you. This is just normal society, ethics,
society functions convention, people generally speak to people
they know, right, there's going to be very few people gonna look out
for people, not everybody has that. So don't take it in a front
directly. There's people who want to leave Islam because
they can't fit in. You don't have to fit in. Understand that this is
from the perspective of an ethnicity, there will be places
that you that you will get to fit into, but don't make this a source
of your abandonment of your faith, the abandonment of your faith,
because that's not what it is. And I know that we need to do more
about this meaning the host communities need to know more
about this. Of course, men have to deal with this kind of stuff as
well. They get kids like any news, you know, are you guys having
children yet? These are all predicaments. I don't think it's
based on acid that the questions that people ask I don't think so.
I think it's just general convention, right for people to
ask these questions. So let us ask Allah subhanaw taala to, to help
to help ourselves and help other people. And may Allah subhanaw
taala allow us to be satisfied with what He has given us. May
Allah allow us to be thankful for what He has given us and allow us
to be patient in what he hasn't given us. But we ask Allah to give
us the best. And may Allah bless you all. May Allah bless us all.
Welcome to that one and Al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen