Abdur Rahman ibn Yusuf Mangera – Crooked Rib

Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said to men, he is

audiences men. So he's talking to men and he is referring to women,

right? Because married men are married to women. Treat your women

well treat women well,

for they are created from a rib.

And the most crooked part of parts of the rib is the upper part. If

you try to straighten it, you will break it. But if you leave it, it

will remain crooked, crooked. So treat women well.

So what does that mean?

The main thrust of this hadith, right the main maksud a main

objective and message about this hadith is that you must treat your

women with gentleness that's what the prophesy was me saying, right?

If we removed all contentious part of our Well, what do you mean by

being created from a ribbon ribbon crooked? What are you talking

about? If we just ignore that for the moment because the message of

it is that you need to treat your women well, that's the message

okay? So you should treat your women with gentleness and you need

to treat them well. And you need to abandon any hope of making them

perfect and straight in your mind. They're going to remain crooked.

You must exercise beautiful patience in dealing with them

because Allah says we're into Spirou highroller come Allah

Hoover photo Rahim. But that you be patient is better for you.

Allah is Most forgiving, very merciful.

So you're either going to exercise patience in avoiding marriage

altogether. If you think that you can't deal with crookedness, avoid

marriage altogether.

That's a difficult one.

But if you do marry then in your interaction with them, you must

also exercise patience, because patience is going to be part of

your life. Whether you get married or you don't get married. You have

to be patient.

What is it now now that we've understood the main objective of

the Hadith? What does it now mean about creating being created from

a rib? Right?

There could be three reasons for this. It could be more reasons,

but I've come up with three reasons from what I've studied.

Number one being created from a rib can literally refer to the

origin since our mother Eve alayhis. Salam how are they a

Salam was created from the highest Rebbe, wa salam, as numerous

narrations tafazzin, etc. Tell us I mean, you know, it says, Allah

mentions that in the Quran as well that however the sun was created

from other monies around, the rib isn't mentioned the Quran is

mentioned in the Hadith, right. But it's mentioned that he was

created, she was created from him in the Quran. So she was created

from the highest group of other mighty Sudan, which happened to be

also the most crooked one.

Now, if you take a rib, you will probably break it. Before you can

straighten it. It's impossible to straighten. If you try to

straighten, it'll break it.

Furthermore, the second point here is that why are the ribs even

there? Why do we have ribs? It's a cage if have you ever seen ribs,

right? If you see a cross section, the skeleton of a rib section, you

will actually see that they

partially enclose and protect the chest cavity. With as many of our

vital organs they're the heart and the lungs, they literally protect

the heart and the lungs.

And they are curved on both sides of our bodies, both the front and

the back to create a cage to provide the maximum protection

they could not have been straight, it would have been a blemish, a

fault. If they were straight, they curved and that's what makes us

look perfect our torso, etcetera, right. So they could not have been

straight. And this is obviously a sign of Allah's protection,

perfection.

The Crooked rib then,

is the whole crooked idea here, the premise or some is just using

from the whole biology of the of the rib. Right. But then there's

another meaning as well, which is the third point that

well, this is still the second point about the protection that a

woman just like she's being created from the rib which is used

to protect the the essential organs. A woman has all the

characteristics required to perform her function of protecting

her family and children.

So if a man tries to change a woman to be like him,

she would not be able to perform her function, which is mercy and

protection of her loved ones.

So you can't make your wife like you.

Right.

It can also be taken metaphorically and figuratively

in the women from a man's perspective, this is not whether

this is the reality or not, but from the way the man views it or

the way generally men view I don't I

I don't necessarily view it like this. But the way men generally

view it is that they think women are.

You can tell me if this is wrong, if the way you or if there's

something else. They think that women are very emotional. They're

too chatty. Right? To talk too much, sometimes.

They never forget things.

Right? That difficult to please. Unreasonable.

And they can't park their cars properly.

Right?

Among other things, that when you get men together in a room, they

would rightly or wrongly banter about. So we're not saying this is

the reality. But this is what men generally when you get men, and

they're talking about the way, this is what they do, I don't do

this, right. I honestly don't do that. But I'm saying a lot of men

do that. These are the criticisms I have for when women get together

to have other criticisms women.

So men, the prophets are also missing some men, if this is how

you view your women.

If in your perspective, this is how women are, then remember that

that's the nature.

Get over it, and look at their positives, so that you can enjoy

them. Rather than being living a miserable life with this

complaint.

Treat them with kindness, gentleness, and persevere against

their crooked, so called crookedness in your mind, where

you have no other option. You're stuck with them. Right? She will

do things that make no sense to you just accept it. Because that's

how women are.

Does it make sense? So he's talking about from a man's

perspective, he's not saying that's how women are, necessarily.

He's saying that's how you think so well, you better deal with it.

Now.

I'm going to give you the Hadith again, with commentary. So I'm

going to mention the words of the Prophet saw some but with a

community to explain now, based on what I just explained, the profits

or losses words.

When I go like this, it means these are the words the problems

are seldom, a woman is created from a rib and cannot remain in

one state. This is what the person said In another Hadith, meaning

she will not always be how you want her to be, but will waver

between sometimes being thankful and grateful to sometimes being

ungrateful and showing in gratitude that's going to happen

to her. Right? Obedience and disobedience, contentment and

Diskant. Someday we're going to say I'm very happy with you, and

sometimes say you've never done this for me.

So if you want to enjoy her, the professor asked me saying, enjoy

her despite her crookedness

since it cannot leave her again. And if you do try to straighten

her, by exceeding the limits, by using force, and you do not excuse

her waist and overlook her deficiencies, again, because you

will end up breaking her and breaking her means divorcing her,

and of the Hadith from Muslim. Similarly, for women, it's not

always one sided. Similarly for women, if they're going to try to

straighten out the perceived flaws of their husband, whether by brute

force, or by nagging him constantly, right? Drop by drop

nagging every day, that's going to be extremely detrimental to their

relationship as well. What you have to remember is that change

comes from within, you can't force somebody to change, you have to

put the right to make the right environment, you have to make the

right points to try to get them to make one the change from

themselves. That's why a loving and compassionate attitude with

Taqwa is going to obviously prove much more effective than being

critical and repeating oneself. That's one of the best ways to win

people over. I showed her the Allahu anha she was very she was

very savvy in the way she used to when the Prophet sallallahu Hamza

loved over to over right.

Once in a hadith she says that the prophets Allah's Messenger said to

me, that I know when you're pleased with me, and I know when

you're angry with me, he figured her out. He says, I know when

you're angry with me, and I know when you're pleased with me.

I said, How do you know that? He said, When you're pleased with me,

then you generally say no by the Lord of Mohamed, like when you're

speaking and you swear an oath you say no, by the Lord of Muhammad.

But when you're angry with me, you say no, by the Lord of Ibrahim. So

you take my name out.

So now, do you know what she said? She was very young, she was less

than eight. She was only 18 When the process and passed away, and

she got married when she was nine. Right meaning she came to the

province and when she was nine, so this is in between teenage years.

She said

yes, but by

Allah, I leave only your name

in words, otherwise you're in my heart.

Right?

So she confirmed that that point her deep rooted love, by

reassuring the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam that it was only

his name that sometimes she left out of saying, but she was he was

always in her heart.

Allahu Akbar. I mean that this hadith indicates to you that they

also had arguments. They also had opportunities to make one another

angry. That's why the person was saying to her, I know when you're

angry with me, and I know when you're happy with me, this is the

best of creation.

They also have healthy arguments. So what do you expect us to do?