Abdullah Oduro – Iman Cave – From Orphaned Parents In Africa To Changing Lives For Orphans
AI: Summary ©
The speakers discuss the importance of leadership by example, not just by kalam, in building empathy and growth for young people. They emphasize the need for leadership by example, not just by kalam, and how it can lead to building a positive life. They also discuss the importance of giving by service, and how it can lead to building a person of action and bringing satisfaction. The segment ends with a discussion of leading by example, and how it can lead to building a person of action and bringing satisfaction.
AI: Summary ©
As-salamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.
May the peace and blessings of Allah be
upon you all.
I'm Abdullah Oduro and welcome to the Iman
Cave where we discuss issues of male excellence
while being grounded in faith.
Be the change that you want to see
in the world.
And the best way of being something is
by doing.
You have to do consistently in order to
be and if it requires a change that
means you are the person that was the
catalyst for that change in society, in a
person's life, for a group of people, for
someone's spirituality.
Allah used you to do something good but
you had to have made the choice.
The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said He
said that each one of you is a
shepherd so each shepherd should take care of
who they are responsible for.
So as a man, as a young boy
being told by their father, being taught by
their father, being showed by their father, their
uncle, their grandfather, the men in their family
how to be a leader.
How to lead by example.
That's what we're going to talk about today,
leading by example.
It's important for the young man that grows
up to be an old man or an
older man, a father eventually, or an uncle,
someone that has a position of experience to
be able to share those experiences in a
way that has an influence on those that
are younger than him, preferably in this setting
for our young men.
But for you young men, it's important initially
to have that intention to lead.
As Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala has put
that in the hands of the Prophets.
We see with the Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi
wa sallam.
He was a leader and he was someone
that was well-rounded in his leadership, rahmatan
lil alameen, as a mercy for mankind, and
also to show us how to be men
of integrity, effective influencers, effective leaders.
So talking about this leadership today and how
to lead by example, we have on my
right, as many of you know, Mashallah, the
Mechanical Engineer of the Year, Mashallah, Tabarak Allah,
Yahya Talib, Mashallah, he's here with us today,
and we have none other than Brother Faldu
Negbene, Mashallah, I hope I pronounced it correctly.
You did.
That's the West African vibe, that's the spice,
you know.
They don't know about that.
I mean, not they, I didn't mean they,
but it's okay.
We all, we have, you know, a little
mud at the end.
But Brother Faldu, Mashallah, he is a Financial
Analyst?
Manager.
Manager, Financial Manager, he moved up, he was
analyst, now he's a manager, Mashallah, Tabarak Allah,
Alhamdulillah.
No, Alhamdulillah, he has an organization, or he
is part of an organization, he's a co
-founder of an organization called Rise Relief, and
this is an organization that deals with helping
and building wells, primarily in West Africa, or
I'll say initially in West Africa, with much
bigger goals, which we're, bigger goals, Inshallah, which
we're going to share, Inshallah ta'ala.
So that's going to be our premise of
this organization, a non-profit organization, but the
story behind it is amazing, and it has
a relevance to all of you young men,
and older men as well, of doing something
that can leave a legacy, but most importantly,
leading when doing that.
So Inshallah, Alhamdulillah, we want to start by
just welcoming you, May Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta
'ala bless you, Inshallah, and I see you
have the Rise Relief, Mashallah, it says RR,
is that Rise Relief, or is it Rolls
-Royce?
I didn't see one outside, Sheikh.
I'm inspired for the Rolls-Royce in Jannah,
Inshallah.
Inshallah, Inshallah, Inshallah.
No, Alhamdulillah, so tell us a little about
yourself, where were you, where were you born,
and where were you raised, and what brought
you here to Dallas?
Jazakallah Khair, As-salamu alaykum wa rahmatullah wa
barakatuh, it's an honor to be here with
you, Jazakallah Khair for having me on this
show.
Yes, to answer your question, Alhamdulillah, I was
born in a very small village called Niki,
Niki, that's in the country of Benin, which
is a small country next to Nigeria in
West Africa.
This is also the home birthplace of my
mother, she was born in Niki as well
too.
My father was born in the northern part
of Benin called Piami, so Alhamdulillah, I was
born there, spent the first year of my
life there, another year in my father's village
in the north, and then Alhamdulillah, my father
got the opportunity to migrate to the south
in Cotonou, where this is basically the main
commercial city.
At the capital?
The capital is actually Porto Novo, it's not
far, probably maybe an hour, an hour and
a half from Cotonou, but Cotonou is basically
the commercial city.
Everyone comes there from Lagos, from Accra, we
have a port, right, and in West Africa,
when you have a port, that's where basically
most of the commerce and economy thrives from.
So I pretty much went to school, I
did my primary school there, I also did
a little bit of my middle school there,
until we got the opportunity to move to
the states.
So I was born and raised in Benin,
Alhamdulillah, and lived there for the first 10
years of my life until I moved to
the states.
SubhanAllah, so was your household the household of
always pushing towards education?
Yes, education was always key because, well, my
parents, Mashallah, Tabarakallah, they literally came from nothing.
They both were orphans at a young age.
My mother at birth and, or shortly after
birth, she never knew her father.
My father became an orphan at the age
of maybe eight or 10 years old, and
him being the fourth youngest in the family,
he had to assume new responsibilities, starting to
go to the farm, to cultivate, to plant,
to provide, to help out his mother.
So education was what actually got him out
of, I don't want to say got him
out of poverty, but it allowed him to
support his family at large, even though he
was the fourth youngest son of his family.
So Mashallah, Tabarakallah, that is what they instilled
in us growing up, that education was always
the key for us to take the next
generation out of poverty, or at least give
them the opportunity to thrive from a financial
standpoint.
Rise Relief.
Tell us about Rise Relief.
So, I mean, I remember when I first
met you.
I mean, Brother Waleed introduced me to you.
Yes, Mashallah.
And Brother Suleiman.
They're actually both on this show before.
Yeah, shout out to them, Mashallah.
We were at Suleiman's house, actually.
That's when I met Suleiman at the same
time as well, yes.
It was beautiful to hear the story of
how it started.
If you don't mind sharing with us the
problem to where you said, OK, something has
to be done.
Was it you?
Was it your mother?
So what was the exact problem that you
were all seeing to where you had to
step up and do something about it?
Each time I mention the story, it's, you
know, it's moving because even though we incorporated
in 2020, about four years ago, I like
to say that it really started 50 years
back.
That's with my parents, Alhamdulillah, specifically my mother.
My mother, as I mentioned, she was an
orphan from pretty much birth.
She never knew her father.
And living in that society, as you know,
living in that society without a fatherly figure,
you're pretty much left to yourself, right?
It was her and her mother.
And she was the one assisting her mother
with income, right?
So imagine as a five, six, seven, eight
-year-old, let's not even get into what
an eight-year-old can do today, but
she was babysitting.
She was doing sales, you know, small merchant
sales.
Maybe the mother would make some cheese or
something from their garden, and she would go
out and sell it and then bring it
back.
Here's what, you know, what she earned from
that.
And unfortunately, it wasn't enough to put her
into school.
She had to actually drop out at a
very young age, but she always had the
drive to go to school.
Alhamdulillah, later on, when we came to the
States, she was able to finish her school.
She got her GED, and then she even
went on and got a certification in nursing.
Mashallah, Tabarakallah.
So when I was born, growing up the
first 10 years of my life in Benin,
we always had somebody at home.
Always had somebody at home.
So at this point, obviously, she's married with
my father together.
They basically would help out orphans from the
villages and bring them south and return to
provide them an education.
So they would be at home helping out.
And at the same time too, during the
day, they would either go for school or
others, if it's too late, they would do
some type of trade.
So they've always done that.
I've always seen, I've always thought they were
family members, but then I later on find
out they had, that person was not a
family member, or maybe it was a distant
family member, right?
In 2020, there was an Islamic school in
Yashikira, Nigeria, which borders Niki from the Benin
side, and Yashikira is on the Nigerian side.
So my mother's side of the family, my
great-uncle has a school, an Islamic school
that was in need of renovation.
And when my mother presented this idea, she
said, hey, this is one of the projects
that we're trying to help out with this
year.
Is that something that we can do?
The first question was like, hey, what's the
budget on this?
What's gonna cost, right?
And this was the first time that it
was gonna cost more than 5,000, let's
say.
It was a $12,000 project to renovate.
They told us that about 500 students or
so, and every year they produce between 12
and 15 half of the Quran.
And they have the roofs caving in.
You have the floors that are completely dismantled.
And on top of that, there are no
windows, right?
So imagine you're in that condition, there's no
electricity, and you're studying the book of Allah.
Of course, it was a beautiful project.
Let's tackle it.
But I told my mother, I think it
was for sure it was Allah who put
that inclination to me and said, mom, this
is over $10,000.
Let's not do it the way we normally
do, which is we collect a little bit,
we go through our personal accounts, and then
we issue it out, right?
Let's actually open a separate account for this,
because I was actually concerned that, hey, this
amount can be audited in the future.
And that's how I started.
And my mother said, okay, what do you
suggest?
I said, well, let's open an account.
Then next thing you know, I started researching,
okay, nonprofits.
It never crossed my mind that we should
establish a nonprofit.
And that's how it started.
So I started researching nonprofits.
We started reading together.
So, hey, what do you guys think of
this?
Maybe we can do something like this.
So initially, it was just gonna be one
project.
I see.
That was it.
And then subhanAllah, fast forward four years later,
it's now we have a drilling operation where
we actually providing and bringing clean water to
rural communities in Benin and Nigeria.
It was inspired by a Quran school that
needed severe help.
And your mother was very passionate about.
Absolutely.
About that.
So the mother served as an inspiration.
100%.
To you.
100%.
Wow.
What year was this that you decided to
take that step to?
Well, COVID happened in...
Late of 2019.
Late, late 2019, right?
So yeah, right around that time that happened.
I've actually was laid off during that time.
So I had extra time.
I think it's all the plan of Allah.
Yeah.
And I wanted to utilize that time for
good.
The intention was to do it right.
We wanted to do it right.
We wanted to be clean.
We wanted to establish something that can actually
have a proper foundation.
So that's how the incorporation started.
Two weeks ago, we took a trip to
Benin.
It was the first time I saw the
school, being there in person.
But of course, we had images.
And we've also shared with our donors the
before and after.
But it was actually moving, seeing that, hey,
this is the school.
This is how it all started.
This is the school that we renovated.
And mashallah, almost every moment, my uncle has
an opportunity to speak with me.
He always shares that, hey, the village is
sharing their dua upon the donors.
So much change has happened here.
The kids are so happy learning.
They were happy, even without electricity.
The budget did not suffice for electricity.
The fact that they had a covered roof,
so that way, when it rains, and they
had a chair to sit in, was more
than enough for them.
I can personally say, there has been several
situations or examples where we thought it was
dead end, and Allah would open the door.
And it's just the fact that we just
kept persevering a little bit.
It doesn't have to be a lot, but
you just persevere.
You just try to find another avenue to
resolve the issues, right?
And alhamdulillah, Allah has opened the doors from
those facets.
I can see it in his face, that
the happiness.
Allah, it's a common thing with the folk
or the people that go out and help.
Subhanallah, also having a background from the Middle
East, obviously.
Each country, may Allah help them.
There's infinite amount of help that's needed all
over the world.
And each family or each organization or each
person that you speak to that is involved,
subhanallah, they're happy, no matter.
They've seen so much destruction and so much
poverty, yet you see them all the time
smiling, and they're always enjoying their work, because
Allah put that happiness in them.
That's what keeps us motivated as well.
Of course, we're doing for the sake of
Allah.
We want the true reward with Allah.
And we know that there are, there is,
there's a jihad that needs to take place.
There is work where we have to struggle,
right, to make certain things happen.
But in this world as well, too, you
can feel it.
And that's exactly what you're talking about, that
satisfaction, right?
When you visit a village, and you meet
the chief of the village, and you ask
him, hey, when was the last time you
guys had access to clean water?
And he looks up, and he makes, you
know, in Africa, we have signs, or you
know, sounds, we make a lot of sounds,
right?
We make a specific sound that everyone just
like, you know that that sound means?
What kind of question is that?
We never had access to water, right?
At first, it'd be like, yeah, exactly.
It'd be like, you know?
So his answer was, he said centuries.
But what I took from that is never.
Centuries.
Their source of water was an open source.
It was a river, not far from where
they live, where they were going, you know,
generally speaking, it's the women, the young girls
that would actually go and fill up the
some of them would do their laundry there,
et cetera.
But it's the same water that's also that
the livestock feed off of.
And sometimes, you know, you have feces that's
in there, but then for them to see
and be so happy that we haven't even
tapped into, we haven't tapped the water yet,
but they were just happy that the team
arrived with the goal that inshallah, we will
establish a water well for them.
You said you lost your job, you let
go.
Was that due to COVID?
No, it was not due to COVID.
It just so happened that it was coincidental.
The company that I was with, which was
the company that Allah facilitated for me to
make hijr with my wife from Tampa to
Dallas.
She's actually Dallas native, but the intention was
to move here.
And it was through a company that filed
for bankruptcy three months after I started.
So I'm in a new city.
I'm married with an eight month old daughter
and I lose my job.
So it was a time of reflection.
It was a time of uncertainty for sure.
And I definitely felt unstable, but Ramadan was
around the corner and I knew that inshallah,
Allah has a better plan.
He has a better plan.
I always knew that he has a better
plan.
And next thing you know, my mother, she
suggested this project or she brought on this
project, which I said, okay, perfect.
I'm going to dedicate half my day towards
researching a new job.
And then the other half, learning about nonprofits
and what it entails to run it correctly.
Okay.
From there, you decided to go through with
these seven months.
I think there's a huge effort of building
this nonprofit organization with building wells.
And she was 40 immediately when you, when
you mentioned it.
Yes.
So the wells came later.
So we started out, as I mentioned, we
started with an Islamic school.
Your first nonprofit initiative was funding the Islamic
school.
Exactly.
Aha.
Okay.
So it was fun.
Yeah, it's correct.
It was funding the Islamic school.
Then Allah showed us that there was a
bigger need, which was water.
And how do we come about?
Because as soon as we were done, we
got feedback that some of the kids were
not going to school.
They were sick.
And they were asking for water.
But we didn't make the connection.
We didn't make the connection until it's almost
like Allah put us in the position where
like, this is the direction I want you
guys to focus to head towards.
But then view your attention towards this.
It started off with that.
So that's why our tagline is providing clean
water and building brighter minds.
Because the clean water facilitates health, promotes economy,
and just helps the village to thrive.
Allows for life.
Exactly.
Without clean water, you can't have life.
You cannot.
So that was the big need or one
of the problems that came about after the
first project.
And we changed our direction towards, hey, what
does it take to implement a water well?
And then that's how we got into it.
SubhanAllah.
Wow.
So that I mean, even, you know, it's
funny, because that level of stepping up and
doing something required you to lose your job
at the moment.
SubhanAllah.
Right.
To even intensify it, if you will.
I mean, and then also research to do
some competency, have some competency in what you're
doing.
And then just take that step.
Your first fundraiser.
I know what it's like.
That's why I want to ask you.
How nervous were you?
How much were you sweating?
How many people were there?
What was it like, if you don't mind
sharing with us how that took place?
Unlike a for-profit organization, you have a
physical product or service to sell in exchange
for money, for funds.
For non-profit, it's literally out of the
goodwill or the goodness of others, right?
Giving, because they believe in your cause.
They believe that you have a specific humanitarian
project that you're working on that they value.
Right?
The challenge becomes making your cause valuable, right?
In order for others to believe.
And of course, that's probably one aspect of
it.
It's your cause.
And the other one is the integrity, right?
But integrity comes with time.
How you structure your organization, how you move,
et cetera.
So going back to your first question about
the first fundraiser.
So this was at EPIC, East Plano Islamic
Center.
I approached this, the project, I spoke with
Ustad Bajour.
Mashallah, he's my beloved Shaykh.
May Allah preserve him and protect him and
keep him as a beacon of light of
Islam for us and generations to come, inshallah.
I mean, so I spoke, I approached him
and said, Hey, look, we have this project
that we're working on.
We want to do a water well in
Benin.
It's going to cost us about 9,000
or so.
And I said, is it possible to share
with the brothers?
And he mentioned, well, without a 501c3 status,
you are pretty much limited, right?
Because in the States with the 501c3 status,
it basically gives your organization the right to
receive donations in exchange for donation receipt, which
most people will use that for their taxes
in the later year, right?
I didn't even think about that, right?
For me, it was just like, which brothers
are ready to support this, right?
But he said, nevertheless, we'll still share with
the population.
I was part of the Sunday Khalaqa group
that he does after Fajr every Sunday.
Also, I was part of the men's over
30 basketball group at Epic.
And they were the first group of men
to sponsor our very first water well.
So I shared with the brothers, obviously at
that time, WhatsApp was becoming a very big
thing.
And I shared with the brothers and some
of the brothers said, Bismillah, let's get started.
Of course, they asked some questions, some of
the questions I didn't know how to answer.
And later on, after we implemented the water
project, we showed them images and a small
video of the well and how excited the
people were, the population were.
And next thing you know, we started receiving
a lot of requests for water in Benin.
That's how it started.
It became more of a, hey, we've heard
you guys did a water well in so
-and-so village.
Can you also bring us one here?
Can you also source us access to clean
water?
Provide us access to clean waters?
Then the request for school or education kind
of died down a bit.
And we saw that there was a bigger
need for that.
And that also triggered my parents to remember
their childhood.
Because at some point they forgot when you
live in the States, especially in the-
No luxurious place that we're in.
Exactly.
In a developed country, right?
Where you could just open the tap and
have any temperature that you want, you kind
of forget.
So they remembered how it was also to
go and fetch dirty water at the expense
of the kid's health.
So subhanAllah, that's how water became the primary
service that we provide through our organization.
I mean, mashaAllah, there was a level of
acceptance, mashaAllah, starting with the group, the men
over 30 group.
Correct.
I didn't know y'all had a basketball
team.
Yes, we do.
You should come and try it out.
I know why they haven't invited me.
I mean, it's very clear.
It's obvious.
What are your plans with this organization?
Because, I mean, I'm seeing different characteristics of
leadership here.
I mean, firstly, taking initiative.
And really that connection that you have with
your mother is very, very important for men
even.
Even when we talk about men and their
fathers and having that example set, it doesn't
mean that it's void of the mother.
Because really that nurturing is very, very important
from the mother for the son and the
daughter as well.
There's a special bond when it comes to
the son and the mother.
There's a special bond with every relationship, father,
daughter as well.
100%.
But that level of protection and of doing
whatever she says at any cost is a
beautiful, honorable relationship.
I mean, honorable for the mother and honorable
for the son.
You know, the mother having the blanket authority.
Pretty much.
Pretty much, right?
To tell him to do whatever and him
having the privilege to do it.
Right?
That's beautiful.
It's a privilege.
It's a win-win.
Yeah, it's a win-win.
And you know what's beautiful about this hadith,
the Prophet, when the man came to the
Prophet, he said, He said, who has the
most right of my companionship?
That's the word, companionship.
And that's when the Prophet said, your mother.
And he said, then who?
He said, your mother.
And he said, then who?
He said, your mother.
He said, then he said, your father.
That's beautiful because he said, my companionship, right?
So when looking at this and hearing the
story of you having that level of closeness
with your mother to where it manifests or
a product of that relationship is helping building
the school, which morph into something that you
didn't even think about at the moment of
donating for the school.
We did not.
Because you're persistent.
That consistency and even that level of risk.
Like taking risk.
You know, with a non-profit, like you
mentioned in the beginning, you're not receiving money
for this in the beginning of doing the
non-profit.
Yes, there's a cause for administration.
And then when you get to a certain
level as a founder, that's where your time
has to be compensated for and your expertise.
Seeing that where you are now, what is
it?
We said 50, so about 50 years ago.
But from the legal inception, about four years.
Exactly.
What are your plans now with this?
And how has this, I mean, within these
four years, what have you seen within yourself
as a man, i.e. father and son?
Because you're a father.
How do you plan to introduce this?
What's the word?
I'll say legacy, this family legacy to them.
I mean, do you initially have the plan
to let this carry over into the family?
Or what are your plans with this?
If you just even try to dream, a
lot makes you dream bigger.
In a way, because it started off with
an Islamic school.
Then it was one project, let's do a
water well.
Then the need came in.
Then we realized, okay, in Benin, it costs,
at the time, it was about $9,000
to do a hand pump well, which is
very difficult to fundraise for.
When other countries can implement wells for a
fraction of the cost, maybe $1,500, $2
,000, right?
So that becomes a challenge of, okay, what
sets that region apart?
Well, several factors.
But number one is we service or we
serve rural communities where the average well that
we've implemented so far is about 80 meters.
We're talking about anywhere between 200 to about
500, 600 feet deep into the ground to
surface water, right?
So there's a difference between a shallow well
and deep well.
So that adds to the expense, right?
That adds to the cost.
Then the second aspect of it would be
the sourcing or hiring a company, a drilling
company to implement the well, right?
And most of the time, they're Nigerian companies.
So imagine you have to, we're sourcing them
from Nigeria to come to Benin to drill.
You also have to pay for their fuel,
for their transportation, right?
And the time that they're there.
So that adds to the cost, right?
So the first year, we thought, long-term,
this won't be sustainable.
There has to be a way where we
can reduce the cost.
And Allah opened up the doors again.
And through actually one of our donors, he
suggested, hey, why don't you invest in your
own machine?
Start a drilling company.
Start a drilling company.
Engineer, we got an engineer here.
So there you go.
So it was a seed that he planted.
And again, where does it come from?
You dream a little bit or you attempt
to dream and Allah makes you dream bigger,
right?
So that's an example of a donor who
said, why don't you think about investing in
your own drilling machine if it costs so
much?
And that's how we formulated a five-year
plan.
We said, okay, guys, let's formulate a five
-year plan.
In five years, inshallah, we would get away
from contracting, which is what most organizations do.
They contract a project, right?
They collect the funds here.
And then they distribute the funds to contractors,
local contractors overseas that will implement the project,
right?
So our five-year plan was, let's get
to a point where we also have our
own operation.
That way we can oversee the entire operation
and have a bit more visibility in what
it actually costs to drill a well.
Allah made it realized in two years.
We had a five-year plan, Allah made
it realized in two years.
And that's at the time where you and
I, we sat down with Waleed and Dr.
Suleiman.
So when I pitched the idea to them,
they loved it.
And with Dr. Suleiman, he's also an engineer
background.
He can literally build a mansion out of
nothing.
Oh yeah, his garage is just a hardware
store.
We gotta do a monthly man cave in
your garage, Dr. Suleiman, coming soon.
So Allah just kept opening up the doors
in terms of, hey, how can we take
it to the next level?
So to tie it back to your question
about the legacy aspect of it, right?
Is that it's wherever also my kids want
to take it, right?
Inshallah ta'ala, I have my vision, I
have my inspirations.
Inshallah ta'ala, as long as Allah blesses
you with long life, I will continue serving
the people in need.
And I would love for this to be,
I would love for rise and leave, inshallah
ta'ala, to carry on for as long
as possible.
Even if today you can't, inshallah ta'ala.
So you said to serve the people in
need.
I mean, that's definitely one characteristic of the
leader is he's selfless.
I mean, and as a father, as a
husband, you come last when it comes to
serving the people in the household.
And that's, I mean, there's not complaint.
It's just, that's the nature of things.
If you're the father, you're the protector, you're
the provider, the ultimate initial protector and provider,
you shouldn't think about yourself first.
It's thinking about your wife, your children.
And that's what's so beautiful, even about when
they talk about in the verses of inheritance,
you know, you'll find some that say, okay,
you know, Allah says, يوسيق مولا في أولادكم
لذكر مثل حضر On the end, he says,
Allah, you know, reminds you or teaches you
about your children in regards to the dispensation
of the money, the waratah after an individual
dies.
He says, لذكر مثل حضر On the end,
for a male is the amount that is
equivalent to two females.
So you'll find some that say, okay, why
is the woman treated lesser than a man?
He's half of the man, et cetera.
Well, because in Islam, the structure always hopes
to establish and maintain a family to where
the man is the ultimate provider.
I mean, the woman can't make money, but
the man is the ultimate provider.
And the reality of that is that, that
one that the man takes is actually going
back to the sister.
That's the point I'm getting to.
So the money that he gets in one
pocket goes out the other.
Yes.
It's to support the two women that have
their amount as well.
Yes.
But that money that he has initially has
to go to them and support the households,
put the family, et cetera, because the father's
not there anymore.
Yes.
Yes.
Right.
So when you're saying you want, I mean,
that they can have or do what they
wish with the effort of rise relief, even
if it's something else.
What is your plan in showing them this
project?
Is it like, for instance, do you want
them to travel to Benin with you every
year, every summer?
How do you plan to show and exhibit
that level of leadership to them?
That is the plan.
The plan is for them, Inshallah Ta'ala,
once they have reached an age of understanding
where they can really remember the experience, is
to take them there and for them to
also see, first of all, where I grew
up and how what we have at our
disposal is not what the rest of the
world has.
Right.
And how water is something that we don't
think about.
Right.
I mean, who thinks about water when you're
thirsty?
When you're thirsty, you know that you can...
Go get something to drink.
You can get something to drink.
If you want a shower, you know that
you just have to take a few steps,
take a left, and that's it.
You're there, right?
Literally, just a few steps.
But in most part of Sub-Saharan Africa,
and I'm sure also Northern too, you have
young girls, preteens that are walking probably four
to five kilometers.
We're talking about two to three miles, maybe
a round trip to go fetch dirty water
in order to provide for their family.
And that's their sustenance.
So there's no better teacher than experiencing it
or seeing it.
I'm not saying we should be in a
situation where we should actually submerge ourselves, but
at least seeing it does something.
And just recently, we took a trip with
a couple of the board members, and this
was the first time also they've been to
Benin.
And you should see the expression on their
faces and the questions they were asking.
And some of them were in disbelief in
the realities of what's happening out there.
And on top of that, seeing people with
a smile on their face, that, they couldn't
believe it.
And what do we complain about here, right?
Many of us are out of touch with
giving back and understanding an environment that to
us seems unreal.
How do I, a young man, a young
woman or a person in this modern society
who's living in a first world country, feel
or put myself in a position where I
can now understand how they feel or start
to contribute to them in the same level
that someone who, for example, like you, who's
experienced all of that can?
Really, you have to immerse yourself in that
environment.
You have to be in that environment.
And if you have an opportunity to go,
it's a beautiful opportunity to take for sure
because you don't realize, to your point about
depression, you don't realize what that experience can
do to your mental state, right?
To your mental health, even your emotional health,
right?
Because everything ties together.
So I'll give you a small example.
So just recently, right?
On the trip, one of the, for me,
even though I grew up there and then
of course spent 10 years there, but it's
still a discomfort that access to public bathroom
is very limited there.
Very limited there, right?
So we planned our days around when we
- Public restrooms where you can take a
break.
Because it's not like here, right?
Again, you don't think about it here, right?
So all these different amenities that we take
for granted here, the best way to do
shukr for those amenities is to go a
period of time without it.
So you put yourself in those hard situations
which will give you gratitude, cause you to
be a person that has gratitude towards Allah
Subh'anaHu Wa Ta-A'la.
Yes.
But then also a level of empathy, right?
100%.
So, and I think within the shariah, it
even has that with fasting and which, you
know, with zakat, when you look at those
that are less fortunate.
But when saying this, I would say, subhanAllah,
for just as father was able to go
recently, but hearing about it from his mother,
mashaAllah, my law preserver, is for these youth
to get involved in some of these non
-profit organizations, this work, you know, these non
-profit organizations that go out to different countries
and, you know, to go and see.
And even within their, with the money that
they have from a job, for example, when
they see it, you know, a fundraiser at
the masjid, there's something for that cause as
well.
Because when you do that, it expresses some
level of sympathy.
Yes, yes it does.
And empathy, either one if you will.
But nothing like seeing it, like you said.
A hundred percent.
And we don't have to even go that
far.
Just go to any downtown.
Yeah, yeah.
Go to any downtown cities, right?
True, yeah.
And just, okay, you know what?
Maybe I have a budget.
I'm gonna give $50.
Instead of giving $50 easily, meaning sending a
payment or, you know, giving to a masjid
or you actually want, actually give it to
someone in need and see, witness that experience.
And I do that with my daughter sometimes.
One of the times we were having, and
she loves bananas.
And we were just going, we happened to
see an elderly person.
I said, no, let's give her the banana.
Let's give her what we have, you know?
And the questions just kept coming up.
She said, why do we have to do
this?
Why do we have to do this?
She was asking very intelligent questions, but she
just didn't understand, what value does this have
to someone else?
So you don't have to go far.
You don't have to go overseas to experience
that, but you can start locally, right?
You can start locally and see the people
that are in need.
And whether if it's, you know, food or
whether if it's, you know, money or blankets,
especially in the winters, do something there.
And if, inshallah to Allah, if you have
the opportunity to actually go where majority of
the environment is in need, then that's also
will stimulate you differently as well.
Yeah, I think this will engender some good
qualities for the young man, particularly.
If he was to go there or his
mother was to let him go with these
organizations and to see this, it's an irreplaceable
experience.
I mean, you can't replace that.
I mean, especially if you've never been put
in that situation.
Yes, exactly.
And you just painted the picture.
You take a couple of steps and you
are drowning in about maybe five, 10 gallons
of water in five minutes.
And someone in a particular country would love
to just get one gallon of that in
clean water.
You know, so when you put that in
proper perspective, that can push you to do
something to give from yourself for yourself.
Yes.
And I think that's important.
And with that is a quality of, no
doubt about it, of a leader.
Because when that young man goes through that
once, twice, three times, and then he decides
to have a family, he will at least
have some stories to tell his children.
To be like, look, this is what I've
done.
This is what I've seen.
This is where I've been.
Which is very important for a young man
as well is to go through experiences and
to allow those experiences to mold you in
a way that establish or strengthen your gratitude,
establish or intensify your sympathy, your empathy.
And that goes with action.
And I think ultimately, that's one of the
things you can look at is when you
lead by example, not by kalam, right?
It's leading by example and not by just
with speech.
My dad always jokes around, but real men
are born from hardship.
Whenever he'd mess around, I'm like, let's say
it was something silly.
He'll say, oh, it's time to go back
home.
It's time to take you back to the
motherland.
The motherland.
He's right, he's right.
Actually, my parents used to threaten me on
that.
I'm telling you.
The moment they felt that, you know, we
were acting.
Yeah, exactly.
Hold on, there's an elephant in the room.
The Arabs, y'all say motherland too?
I mean, Baba will say something.
I mean, he'll say leblad, you know.
That's leblad.
Hey, just tell me motherland.
But we'll keep the blad, that's fine.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, we'll keep the blad.
We get the motherland.
No, no, but subhanAllah, seriously, that's literally how
it goes.
Because, I mean, it's true.
And you experience it for yourself.
And not to say that that's the only
factor, but the environment plays a huge role
in building someone.
And then the one last thing I wanted
to ask, because a lot of times people
or young men or women have a hard
time taking that first step.
Giving away from your own pocket.
Because, I mean, we work so hard, especially
in a world like this, where your money
is being taken from everywhere.
You've got, you know, money going here, money
going there.
Expenses are so high.
Inflation is so high.
It's so difficult for someone in these times
to make the decision to actively go out
and make that, even if it's five or
10 or 20 bucks.
Because relative, you know, 20 bucks to someone
that's, you know, young, that's, maybe that's their
lunch or something.
You know, subhanAllah.
So, I want your take, and I'm going
to kind of start it with this hadith
that my dad gave me, was, مَا نَقَصَ
مَالٌ مِّن صَدَقَةٍ And, you know, guys, oh,
Sunnah Salah Salaam said, no money, no wealth
is lost from charity or donation.
And that's given a lot of, I think,
I mean, Allah make me better and better,
but that allows me sometimes to say, I'm
not losing that.
If I can put money in S&P
500 and say, it'll grow in 50 years,
how can I not put money in Allah's
word and say that will grow in my
lifetime?
SubhanAllah.
First of all, let's define what wealth is,
right?
Personally, I don't think what is just monetary.
It's also in your health.
It's also the peace that you have at
home.
It's also how you feel, the mental state,
right?
So you don't know where that wealth is
coming from, right?
If anyone would pose the question, say you
lose your leg, how much would you give
for it?
What would be the answer?
It's priceless.
You get everything you have.
But in the moment, we feel that it
has a price, but it doesn't really have
a price, right?
So there's a different level of giving, obviously
for everyone, but you can give with your
time.
You can give with your service, right?
And generally speaking, when you're starting off some
type of non-profit or charitable work, it's
your time that's your most valuable asset.
And Sheikh Inshallah, of course, you can add
on to this, is that being of service
to others is probably one of the most
beloved act of worship, isn't it?
Oh, yes, Sheikh, of course.
Right?
So that servitude is where any one of
us can start, whether if it's spending a
couple of hours at the masjid, cleaning the
bathroom, or just helping out with the Sunday
school and working at the parking lot, just
doing something.
And maybe from that little action, it motivates
you to do more.
And you don't know where the wealth is
gonna come.
It could come in monetary, it could come
with inspiration.
It can be opportunity.
Exactly, opportunity.
So to answer your question, really, anyone can
start with something that can give back.
If money is an issue, then give your
time, give a little bit of your time,
whatever free time that you have, allocate that
towards something good that serves others.
And Inshallah, Allah will put the satisfaction in
you.
And that will motivate you to do more,
Inshallah.
Alhamdulillah, it was a great episode, man.
It was a great gathering, Inshallah.
And speaking about this of leading by example
and being a person of action and letting
that action push you to do things that
you never would have known that it would
have come in front of you.
As you've seen, it started with the Quran
school and moved on to this organization providing
wells, starting in Benin, but planning to go
all around the world, Inshallah.
May Allah SWT bless the project, Inshallah.
Rise, relief, Inshallah.
And may Allah SWT make you a person
of action, a person of risk, and a
person of gratitude.
BarakAllahu feekum.
Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.