Abdullah Hakeem – Parent’s Heart
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AI: Transcript ©
All praise is due to Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala.
We praise him,
we seek his help, and we ask for
his forgiveness.
We praise and thank Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
for once again allowing us all to be
gathered here today
for.
I ask Allah
to bless each and every one of us.
And I ask Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
to gather us like we are gathered here,
but
Before we continue, just please remember,
if you talk while the chutba is happening,
you may lose a reward of the chutba.
Even if you play with something in front
of you,
you may lose the reward of the chutba,
so please do not do so and listen
attentively.
Now, I was thinking of what to talk
about today,
and I was thinking, okay, it's after Ramadan,
and maybe, you know, we should be speaking
a little bit about the deeds that we
can do after the month of Ramadan.
But then,
I thought that we just had our parent
teacher interviews, and I thought I wanted to
speak a little bit about that.
Because something
amazing happens without
us realizing with our parents.
A lot of the students, a lot of
the children don't know this when it comes
to their parents, or they may know any
theory, but they don't understand it.
Your parents
were here yesterday and the day before yesterday
because they really care for you,
and they want to know your progress, how
you're going,
what's happening with you in school,
your academic level, your behavior level,
because they feel and they are responsible for
you. They are your parents,
and they want to make sure
that you are in the right place, that
you are learning well, that you have a
bright future ahead of you.
They are concerned about you
because they know that on the day of
judgement, parents will be asked about their children.
How they raise their children,
where they have placed them for education and
so on and so forth.
That's why your parents came yesterday
and the day before.
But something you don't realize,
there was
many parents that I saw
and there were 2 parents in particular
that, you know, subhanAllah, opened my eyes a
lot. And I wanted to share
my experience with you. Now you don't know
who these parents are. That child wasn't even
there with the mother. But just to show
you,
you know, the the depths of what your
parents and how they think.
There was one mother who was with me,
and I was speaking to her,
and I was mentioning to her that, you
know, your son in the past, you know,
he was a little bit disruptive in class.
He would disrespect. He would, you know, so
so on and so forth. But I said,
subhanallah,
your son has shown a lot of signs
of maturity.
You know, and I said that I'm so
pleased to see him how he is this
year
and, you know, to see him grow into
a man that is becoming.
And one thing I said was, I am
very very proud of him.
As soon as I said that, she burst
into tears.
She started to cry
and she said something. She said, you know,
our children
will never understand
the hearts of their parents.
They will not understand,
you know, how much we care for them,
how much we love them, how much we
sacrifice for them.
They will not understand. I said, sister,
they will understand,
but they will understand it when they become
parents themselves.
They will only understand they might know in
theory,
but they will not understand it unless and
until they become parents.
And it's the it's the fact, it's the
truth.
Your parents care about you so much.
And that's why I thought today I wanted
to speak a little bit little bit about
parents. We know ayaats. We know a hadith
of the prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam in
regards to parents.
We know how we should be dealing with
them. But I want you to understand
the value of having parents in your life,
especially your mothers. Not disregarding the fathers, but
especially your mothers.
The how the the care that your mothers
have for you, and of course, the sacrifices
that your fathers do for you. It's very,
very important to care for that.
Another parent that I saw,
she she was talking about her other son,
already graduated, already working, you know, living living
his life. And she was saying, I thought
that my son has gone astray.
I thought that that's it. You know, I've
done what I could. I've made dua to
Allah, and it seemed like Allah didn't answer
my dua. And I was feeling I had
this fear that I'm gonna lose him.
But then she said to me that, subhanAllah,
his life changed completely.
He is respecting me. He is listening to
me. And she said that recently, he came
up to me and he apologized
for everything that he did for many years.
He said, mom, all the things that I've
done in the past,
I want to sincerely apologize for it. And
he gave her a hug.
He gave her a hug and he said,
mom,
I'm going to make sure
that your life that I'm gonna take care
of you, your life becomes beautiful. You're gonna
be happy with me. You're gonna be proud
of me. She was telling me this, and
she was crying and she's telling me this.
Because they no one understands the hearts of
mothers, the hearts of parents.
That's why they were there yesterday. That's why
they were there on Wednesday because they care
about you. They love you. And this is
why Allah ta'ala talks about them so much
in the Quran. This is why the prophet
shalallahu alaihi wa sallam speaks about parents in
so many hadith.
And we need to really understand this.
Because if we disrespect our parents,
then really we are in shaky waters. You
know, we're gonna drown. We're not it's not
gonna look good on the day of judgement.
That's the status of parents in Islam. And
we must acknowledge this.
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala in the Quran, he
says,
We all should memorize this verse.
Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala, he gives us a
command.
He says to us, and your Lord has
decreed,
it's a command from Allah, that you worship
none except for Him.
And to your parents,
be jutiful towards them. Give them good treatment.
Whether one of them or both of them
attain old age
with you, then do not say any words
of disrespect.
An example is off.
Don't even utter,
you know, words that show that you're upset
with them. And you know when we speak
to students
and we talk about parents relationship with their
with their kids and so on, students they
say something to me. They say, my parents
never understand me. My parents don't get me.
I know that to some extent that's true
because it's a different generation.
They maybe came from overseas,
They don't know what you're going through in
this generation.
To to some extent, that's true.
But we forget and we fail to realize
that they really care for
you. You know, sometimes parents and you probably
heard this saying before. Parents are sometimes cruel
to be kind.
Right? We know this. Sometimes parents have to
give certain punishments
so that you can be fixed.
It can help you to understand.
And that's the way you may be grounded.
You may get in trouble. You may your
privileges may be taken away from you, but
that's because your parents care for you. That's
because your parents know that if you drive
too fast, you're going to crash.
Your parents are doing this to protect you.
Right? And our job as teachers is to
help parents realize what you're going through, and
for you to realize how much your parents
care for you.
So it's important for you to acknowledge this
and understand
this. So here Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala talks
about the importance of parents. Don't say a
word of disrespect
to them
at all, subhanAllah.
Because Allah knows that you're going to be
in times where you're not gonna understand your
parents. And you're gonna say they don't understand
me, they don't care about me, this and
that, and you're gonna start disrespecting them. Allah
commands, don't even say oof. Because what happens
is when your parents get older,
their mentality changes.
You're gonna understand the world differently. They understand
it differently.
But still don't disrespect them.
Because do not forget the time where you
didn't understand anything and yet your parents cared
for you.
When you were a child, when you were
a baby,
you didn't know how to walk.
Your parents were there for you when you
were in bed, not moving. Your parents were
there for you when you couldn't go to
the bathroom. Your parents were there for you
when you couldn't pick up the spoon and
feed yourself. Your parents were there for you
your first time you were walking. You were
talking.
Your parents did all of that for you.
And I'm sure a lot of you have
seen the videos where there was a man
and there was an older man, his father.
And the father kept asking, what is this?
He sees a bird. What is this?
The son, who is also older, he says,
it's a sparrow. It's a bird. And then
the father asks again, what is this? He
says, dad, I just told you. It's a
bird.
And then he says, son, what is this?
Dad, how many times I'm going to tell
you? It's a bird. You can't see it?
He's getting annoyed. Then the father brings up
the diary and shows, my son today asked
what is this and I said it's a
bird. When he was when he was a
kid. And then he said, my son asked
me again what is it? And he said,
it's a bird. And he said I repeated
it 3, 4, 5 times with love,
with compassion because my son is learning. But
then we get so frustrated with our parents
as as they are growing
old. Allah ta'ala tells us do not ever
say words of disrespect to them because that
is a major sin. So we need to
stay away from that. And then Allah subhanahu
wa ta'ala continues,
do not repel them, but speak to them
words of kindness,
always. Then he says,
He tells us to make dua for them.
A dua that we should say. And what
is this dua? My lord, have mercy upon
them
as they have had mercy on me when
I was young,
when I was little. Your parents took care
of you so much. In another verse in
Surah Luqman, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala tells us
to be dutiful towards your parents.
Your mothers and then he highlights mothers.
Your mothers carried you
for so long. 9 months, they carried you
in hardship.
They gave birth to you. And then for
2 years,
they weaned you. They gave you milk. They
looked after you.
Have we forgotten about that?
And then here, we think it's okay to
yell at our parents, to scream at our
parents. Our parents tell us, can you put
the trash can you put the trash outside
in the bin? And we yell and scream.
And we say, no, we have no time.
You can't get off your game and and
and help your parents around. How can we
do this as a believer?
How can we say this to our parents
if we are true believers?
So please understand the importance
of parents and make dua for them.
Always make dua for them. Did you know
when parents pass away,
the dua of the righteous child is accepted
by Allah?
The dua of the righteous child
is accepted
by Allah for his or her parents.
And while you're alive,
take advantage of the dua of your parents.
Because in the hadith of the prophet, the
dua your parents make for you is accepted
by Allah.
So just imagine, and inshallah this never happens.
But imagine you annoy your parents so much
and your parents utter something that is negative
towards you. They say something that is negative
towards you. That is accepted by Allah.
So we should be very careful. If we
really love our parents,
care about our parents, ask your parents. Mom,
dad, make dua for me. Make me Ask
Allah to make me the best child. Ask
Allah to make me the best student. Ask
Allah to give me
to forgive my sin. Trust me, you don't
even have to ask your parents, but your
parents already do that.
Your parents already do that for you. And
this is why it is so important, subhanAllah.
There is a hadith
where Abdullah ibn Umar radiAllahu anhu, he said
that one day This is after the prophet
he said, one day, I saw a man
doing tawaf around the Kaaba,
and he was carrying his mother on his
back.
Right? There was no wheelchairs at that time.
He was carrying his mother on his back,
and and he was doing tawaf around the
Kaaba.
And after And I remember,
7 rounds around the Kaaba is not easy
in the heat of the sun, and then
you have your mother on your back.
And then after that, he looked at Abdullah
bin Umar and he said, yeah, Abdullah bin
Umar, he said, have I
done my duty towards my mother?
Have I done my duty towards my mother?
Have I paid her back? I mean I've
carried her. Seven rounds around the car, but
that's a lot. Have I done my duty?
Abdulai bin Umar, he smiled and said, look,
you did good. But what you did was
not even equivalent
to the pains of death to the for
to the pains of when your mother was
giving birth to you. It's not equivalent to
that at all. SubhanAllah.
You can never ever ever repay
your parents. So think about what your parents
do for you. Think about everything that they
do for you. Appreciate it. Make dua for
them. And inshallah,
today, if you can, go home, give them
a hug. Say thank you for everything that
you've done and ask for forgiveness.
And you'll see your mothers and your fathers
have a soft soft spot. They're merciful.
They will forgive anything you do to them.
So do that inshallah and you will see
beautiful things happening in your life.
I will end off this chutba
with a beautiful story.
And it is it is it is a
story of a tabi'ayn.
So a Tabi'ain is someone
who has met and seen
the Sahabas of the Prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam.
This man is known as Uwais Al Qarni
and he lived in Yemen.
He became a Muslim
when the prophet was alive, when the prophet
was there in Madinah.
And he really wanted to see the prophet
shalallahu alaihi wa sallam, but he couldn't
because he had an elderly mother that he
took care of.
He couldn't leave his mother.
So he was always there.
And something amazing the prophet said that
amongst people in the society,
there are people who are
low class, meaning
people think that they are low class.
But they are so high in the sight
of Allah
that any promise they make, any oath they
make, any dua they make, it is accepted
by Allah. Uwe Selkari was one of those.
He also suffered from leprosy, you you know,
diseases on the skin.
And he made dua to Allah if he
can cure him. And Allah ta'ala cured him
from that disease except for a size of
a coin. He still had a bit on
his shoulder and there's wisdom behind that. Every
time he saw that, he remembered Allah cured
him and he will thank Allah for it
all the time. He took care of his
mother so much.
The prophet
was once sitting with his companions. Umar of
yallahu an was there with him.
And the prophet
he
said, there is a man
from the Tabi'in
by the name of Uwais.
He is from a place called Al Qarn.
And he said he had leprosy
and he was cured except for a size
of a coin.
If he made an oath,
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala will fulfill that oath.
And he has a mother
that he takes care of.
He said to the companions,
if you see him, if you meet him,
then ask him to seek forgiveness for you
because he will be accepted by Allah.
Right?
So
people from other countries would come to Mecca
and they, Sahabers, would look for Uwe Salqarni.
Couldn't find him. Abu Bakr's time came when
he was Khalifa, no one could find him.
Omar radhiallahu and his time came when he
was Khalifa, couldn't find him. 10 years after
when Omar alaylan was Khalifa, after 10 years
Now remember, every year, he would ask any
caravan that came from Yemen he's always with
you. He's always with you. That's how much
they took the words of the prophet.
After 10th year,
Uwey salqarani came. So his mother already passed
away at that time. He came.
And the and Umar radiAllahu when asked the
caravan that came from Yemen, is Uweis with
you? They say yes.
And Omar was like, where? Where is he?
And then one of the one of the
person he said pointed to him, that's him
there.
Why do you need him? I mean, he's
No, he's not. Why are you looking for
him? He said, don't worry. Omar alayhielah went
to him.
He said, are you always?
He looked at him, he said yes.
He said are you from Murad, a place
in Yemen? He said yes. Are you from
Alukarin?
He said
yes. Are you the one who had leprosy
and Allah cured you except for the size
of a coin? He said yes.
He said can I see it?
And then he was very curious and then
he he showed him. He goes, that's it.
He goes, yes. He goes, did you have
a mother that you took care of?
He said, yes. And he's intrigued. He's like,
yes. He's like, you're the one.
You're the one the prophet spoke about. He
said, the prophet spoke about me? He said,
yes. The prophet spoke about you and he
told us, if we meet you, then we
have to ask you to ask Allah for
our forgiveness. So please,
ask Allah for my forgiveness.
And then he said, but you're Amirul mumineen.
You are the leaders and if there was
a prophet after the prophet Muhammad, it would
have been you. You should ask for forgiveness
for me. He said, no. No. No. No.
The prophet spoke about you. Right? You need
to ask me for forgiveness. So he asked
him forgiveness.
And then he said, where are you going
next? He said, I'm going to Syria after,
or to to to Iraq.
And he said, listen, Omar al Gaylehan said,
I'm gonna call the people there, I'm gonna
talk to the people there, and I'm gonna
make sure that when you get there, you
know, you are taken care of. He said,
no. No. No. Don't do that. Please don't
do that. I'm a simple person
and I wanna be simple.
And please don't tell anyone about me. Don't
tell anyone. He was very humble.
But Omar of the Alawam, everyone knew that
Omar was looking for this person. So when
people found out, they all kept coming to
him.
He finished his Hajj, and the hadith mentions
that no one knew what happened to him
after. He disappeared. He didn't want people to
know about him. He's so humble.
But why was he so great?
Why?
Because he took care of his mother. He
didn't even go and see the prophet because
of his mother.
The prophet stopped Sahabas from jihad
because their mothers and fathers were elderly and
told them that's your jihad. Look after them.
Take care of them.
So please remember this,
your parents are gold.
Don't forget this. And lastly, the hadith of
prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam,
jannah
lies under the feet of your mothers.
And remember, your fathers are the doors of
paradise.
So please remember that inshallah,
when you meet your parents, greet them nicely,
don't say bad things to them, ask them
for forgiveness, embrace them, and you'll see your
life change inshallah. We ask Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala to bless our parents, and we ask
Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala to make us all
beautiful towards our parents.