AbdelRahman Murphy – Thirty & Up Treasury Of Imam Al-Ghazli Class 17

AbdelRahman Murphy
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The segment discusses the three stages of Islam, including the belief in the third stage, which is when everyone experiences the fruit of their actions, avoiding mistakes, and regretting regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret regret

AI: Summary ©

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			As-salamu alaykum.
		
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			Bismillah, bismillah, walhamdulillah, wassalatu wassalamu ala rasulillahi wa
		
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			ala alihi wa ashabihi ajma'een.
		
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			Welcome home everybody.
		
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			It's good to see you, alhamdulillah.
		
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			Okay, bismillah.
		
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			Sorry for the delay, really sorry.
		
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			Just finishing up some important conversation inside.
		
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			Lost track of time, but alhamdulillah.
		
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			The good thing about being a Muslim is
		
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			that you believe in predestination.
		
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			So, I couldn't have started any earlier.
		
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			Allah knew that it was going to start
		
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			tonight late, so.
		
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			That was a little joke, clearly not funny.
		
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			Alright, we're number...
		
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			We are starting on passage number 17.
		
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			So, we're about halfway done with our text.
		
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			So, one of the key ingredients in anyone's
		
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			path to Allah subhana wa ta'ala.
		
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			We talked about this a little bit last
		
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			night.
		
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			We actually said that there's a categorization of
		
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			every Muslim.
		
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			Your life can be broken down into three
		
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			stages.
		
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			The first is when you are following and
		
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			obeying Allah subhana wa ta'ala.
		
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			The second is when you are falling short
		
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			of obeying Allah.
		
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			And the third is, as a result of
		
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			falling short, you repent back to Allah subhana
		
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			wa ta'ala.
		
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			So, there's basically three modes that every person
		
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			can be existing in.
		
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			So, the first two are just fairly...
		
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			I guess you could say they're just sort
		
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			of existential in nature.
		
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			Like you're either going to be obeying or
		
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			not obeying.
		
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			But the third is really that the moment
		
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			of repentance is really the one where you
		
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			shine.
		
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			That's where every believer proves their mettle and
		
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			proves their worth with Allah subhana wa ta
		
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			'ala.
		
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			And that's where most people in the stage
		
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			of repentance, that's where they start to climb
		
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			the ladder back to Allah.
		
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			There's actually a book by a great scholar
		
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			and he actually titled it, The Book of
		
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			the Repentant People.
		
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			And in it are just like, I think
		
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			300 stories, very famous narrations about moments of
		
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			repentance that began even during the life of
		
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			the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, but then
		
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			also extended through his life and encompass some
		
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			of the Sahaba and then those other individuals
		
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			that came later, the righteous predecessors that followed.
		
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			And some of these stories are incredible.
		
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			And they talk about like, for example, the
		
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			chronic alcoholic, right?
		
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			Or the person who was stealing from their
		
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			community or the person that was just completely
		
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			immoral.
		
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			And that person and their moment of realization,
		
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			their moment of when their heart turned back
		
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			to Allah subhana wa ta'ala.
		
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			On this topic in particular on repentance, it
		
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			was once asked of Sayyidina Umar radiyallahu anhu.
		
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			You know, who's better in the sight of
		
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			Allah?
		
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			The one who never makes a mistake, who
		
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			never sins or the person who makes a
		
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			mistake and repents?
		
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			And Umar, he responded and the narration said
		
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			he responded with quickness and with definitiveness.
		
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			He said, without a doubt, it's the one
		
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			who makes a mistake and repents.
		
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			So the person basically gave like a riddle,
		
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			who's better?
		
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			The one who never sinned or the person
		
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			who sinned and repented?
		
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			He said, without a doubt, it's the one
		
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			who repents, makes a mistake and repents.
		
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			So the person asking was like confused, caught
		
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			off guard.
		
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			Yeah, we know tawbah is good, but how
		
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			could it be the case that that person's
		
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			better than the one who never made a
		
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			mistake?
		
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			And they were trying to make this argument.
		
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			You know, sometimes we have these debates, you
		
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			know, these ethical dilemma debates.
		
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			And so this is a similar one.
		
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			How can you say that the one who
		
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			made a mistake and repented is better than
		
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			the one who never made a mistake?
		
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			That person's perfect.
		
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			And Umar, again, look at the way these
		
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			people, their minds and their hearts work.
		
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			He said, to make a mistake and come
		
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			back to Allah shows much higher strength in
		
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			faith than to never have to climb out
		
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			of the ditch.
		
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			Like a person who's never had to repent
		
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			in terms of like big mistakes, their faith
		
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			is good, of course.
		
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			May Allah give us that nice period.
		
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			But think about the one that had to
		
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			stumble, but had to get up and keep
		
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			going.
		
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			Like what type of courage, what type of
		
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			fortitude, what type of resilience, what type of
		
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			subhanallah strength that person must have possessed.
		
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			So Umar said that believer is way stronger
		
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			than the one who never had to deal
		
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			with the effect of making the mistake in
		
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			the first place.
		
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			So tonight's topic is on this virtue of
		
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			tawbah.
		
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			What does it mean to be a person
		
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			of repentance?
		
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			What actually motivates repentance?
		
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			You know, there are, my teacher once said,
		
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			there are some sins that we do where
		
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			we ask Allah to forgive us.
		
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			Like it's manifestly obvious that this is a
		
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			mistake.
		
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			You made a mistake, make repentance and move
		
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			on, right?
		
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			But think for a moment to yourself even
		
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			of all the mistakes that you may have
		
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			made that you actually forgot about before you
		
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			remember to repent.
		
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			And think about those mistakes that escaped your
		
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			consciousness before you remember that you made them.
		
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			And now if you had to like every
		
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			year in Ramadan, you sit there and you're
		
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			asking Allah to forgive you.
		
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			Imagine like doing an inventory and thinking about
		
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			all the mistakes you may have made, right?
		
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			The words, the glances, maybe the lies, whatever,
		
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			all of those things.
		
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			And my teacher said, never forget this dua.
		
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			He said, ask Allah to forgive you for
		
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			the mistakes that you forgot to repent for.
		
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			Like make this all encompassing comprehensive dua.
		
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			Oh Allah, forgive me for the mistakes that
		
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			I know and those that I don't know.
		
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			The ones that I forgot about and the
		
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			ones that I remember, right?
		
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			Because we're human beings, we forget.
		
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			So there is a process and there is
		
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			a motivation to this act of tawbah.
		
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			It's not guaranteed, it's not given, right?
		
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			It's not an absolute that every Muslim is
		
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			gonna be a person that makes repentance.
		
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			No, there are some of us, may Allah
		
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			protect us, where we make mistakes and we
		
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			just move on.
		
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			And we think in our minds and our
		
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			hearts that you know what, Allah will forgive
		
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			me.
		
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			He will and He can, but He told
		
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			us that there are steps along the way.
		
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			So Imam Ghazali, he writes here, and this
		
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			is taken from his Ihya as well.
		
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			He writes, hadd al-taubati.
		
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			What's the definition, what is the actual meaning
		
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			of the word tawbah, right?
		
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			And you know Imam Ghazali is not going
		
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			like a dictionary.
		
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			He's gonna give you like a real nice,
		
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			like a beautiful sweet nectar of this word.
		
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			He says, tawbah is defined as innaha zawabanul
		
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			hashalima sabqa minal khata' He says, tawbah is
		
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			the act of feeling the pain and the
		
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			ache of one's mistakes.
		
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			That's the actual fuel.
		
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			Like when I say astaghfirullah, you guys ever
		
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			done that astaghfirullah before?
		
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			Right, you say something like astaghfirullah.
		
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			In the absence of the ache, there is
		
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			actually no repentance.
		
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			Isn't that interesting?
		
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			Like the words are empty.
		
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			Okay, think about this, yeah, think about this.
		
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			Hey man, we missed the whole thing because
		
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			of you.
		
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			Yeah, sorry.
		
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			You guys ever dropped a sorry like that?
		
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			Alright, I'm seeing spouses look at each other.
		
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			Don't do that.
		
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			Not now.
		
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			Once you leave, do everything you want, right?
		
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			Not here.
		
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			This is not therapy, okay?
		
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			This is personal therapy, okay?
		
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			So that apology is empty.
		
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			That apology, it echoes on the inside.
		
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			It's an empty vessel.
		
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			So he says, before we think about tawbah
		
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			as like, oh, what words can I say?
		
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			Oh, what dua can I make?
		
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			Oh, what charity can I give?
		
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			This is typically how people approach the act
		
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			of tawbah.
		
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			What can I do?
		
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			He says, no, no, no.
		
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			What can you feel?
		
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			What can you feel?
		
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			Do you feel anything?
		
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			This is why the Prophet ﷺ said, أَنَدْمُ
		
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			تَوْبَةٌ He said, nadam, remorse, regret is tawbah.
		
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			That if a person experiences nadama, this emptiness,
		
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			you know, like you were really hungry and
		
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			now you're not hungry anymore.
		
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			That's regret.
		
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			When a person feels that, that's a sign.
		
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			You know, tossing and turning.
		
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			Wondering what the person is feeling, what they're
		
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			thinking.
		
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			Did I hurt their feelings?
		
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			Do they feel left out?
		
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			How can I make it up to them?
		
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			These thoughts are actually the symptoms of a
		
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			person that is repenting.
		
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			Okay?
		
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			So, don't run away from guilt.
		
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			Don't run away.
		
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			Don't be consumed by it, but don't run
		
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			away from it.
		
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			Because remorse and regret and guilt are part
		
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			of the proof that you're feeling repentant.
		
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			Okay?
		
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			So he says, he says that these are
		
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			the signs.
		
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			He says, اَوْ نَارٌ فِي الْقَلْبِ تَلْتَهِبُ He
		
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			says, or it is the fire that is
		
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			inside of the heart of a person.
		
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			Okay?
		
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			وَصَدْعٌ فِي الْكَبَدِ لَا يَنْشَعِبُ He says that,
		
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			or it's the crack in a person that
		
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			cannot be filled.
		
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			Basically, tawbah is fueled by a restlessness.
		
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			It's a feeling of incompleteness.
		
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			It's a feeling of an empty pit.
		
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			It's the emptiness in the pit of your
		
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			stomach when you see the person or the
		
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			eyes of the person that reminds you of
		
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			the mistake that you made.
		
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			It's the remembrance of the prayer that you
		
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			missed that morning.
		
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			It's the remembrance of the thing you forgot
		
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			to do.
		
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			And it's the feeling that you have in
		
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			that moment.
		
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			Okay?
		
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			He says also, it is when a person
		
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			takes into consideration وَبِإِعْتِبَارِ مَعْنَةَ التَّرْكِي He says,
		
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			it is when a person starts to consider
		
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			and take into consideration the meaning of giving
		
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			something up.
		
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			You know when you really love something, like
		
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			I have a friend, mashallah, may Allah increase
		
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			him in strength.
		
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			He has not had, willingly I should say,
		
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			he has not had, or intentionally is a
		
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			better word.
		
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			Willingly sounds like he's a hostage.
		
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			Intentionally has not had, like unnatural, like refined
		
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			sugars, I think in like three years.
		
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			So he has like things like honey or
		
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			he'll eat fruit.
		
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			But he doesn't have like sugar.
		
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			Okay, like a spoon of sugar in his
		
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			chai, won't have it.
		
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			Okay, he avoids it.
		
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			He'll mix honey and that's fine.
		
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			But he's not, for three years.
		
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			Okay, so imagine like all the desserts left
		
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			over at his house.
		
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			Imagine people bring, you know, cupcakes, whatever.
		
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			He won't have it.
		
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			Okay, why?
		
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			Because he's committed.
		
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			He's committed to that.
		
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			He wanted to change his, he abandoned it.
		
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			So repentance is the act of tark, abandoning
		
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			something.
		
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			It's when you give something up.
		
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			It's when you say to yourself, this is
		
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			it.
		
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			Okay, so the consideration is when a person
		
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			abandons something.
		
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			And he says, it is also when a
		
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			person, the definition of repentance then becomes removing
		
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			the clothing of rejection and spreading out the
		
00:10:55 --> 00:10:57
			rug of loyalty.
		
00:10:57 --> 00:10:58
			Who's he talking about here?
		
00:10:58 --> 00:10:59
			He's talking about Allah subhana wa ta'ala.
		
00:11:00 --> 00:11:02
			He says when a person commits a sin,
		
00:11:02 --> 00:11:04
			they're wearing a cloak of rejection of Allah.
		
00:11:05 --> 00:11:07
			They're basically wearing a uniform.
		
00:11:08 --> 00:11:10
			When I sin against Allah, I'm putting on
		
00:11:10 --> 00:11:12
			the uniform of not obedient.
		
00:11:12 --> 00:11:14
			I'm not obeying Allah.
		
00:11:14 --> 00:11:16
			I'm deciding, you know what, not for me.
		
00:11:16 --> 00:11:19
			Okay, but he says when a person repents
		
00:11:19 --> 00:11:21
			to Allah, what they're doing is like they're
		
00:11:21 --> 00:11:23
			taking off that cloak and they're taking out
		
00:11:23 --> 00:11:25
			the nicest rug they have and they're putting
		
00:11:25 --> 00:11:25
			it down.
		
00:11:25 --> 00:11:28
			Because the rug, especially in the classical Arab
		
00:11:28 --> 00:11:31
			culture, the rug was a sign of honoring
		
00:11:31 --> 00:11:32
			one's guest of a place where we could
		
00:11:32 --> 00:11:33
			sit, the majlis.
		
00:11:33 --> 00:11:37
			Right, because otherwise your home was dust, it
		
00:11:37 --> 00:11:37
			was dirt.
		
00:11:37 --> 00:11:39
			So you put out some nice rug and
		
00:11:39 --> 00:11:40
			you sat down on it.
		
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			So when a person makes tawbah, they're deciding
		
00:11:42 --> 00:11:45
			that I'm leaving, I'm abandoning this bad behavior
		
00:11:45 --> 00:11:47
			and instead I'm welcoming in now this what?
		
00:11:48 --> 00:11:48
			Loyalty, he says.
		
00:11:49 --> 00:11:51
			Commitment back to Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala.
		
00:11:52 --> 00:11:55
			Tawbah begins by a person abandoning and it's
		
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			achieved by a person recommitting back to Allah
		
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			subhanahu wa ta'ala.
		
00:11:59 --> 00:12:01
			And he says when a person puts out
		
00:12:01 --> 00:12:05
			that rug of loyalty, he then quoted a
		
00:12:05 --> 00:12:09
			beautiful statement of a person, Sahl ibn Abdullah
		
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			al-Tustari.
		
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			He said that he said, التوبة تبديل الحركات
		
00:12:13 --> 00:12:20
			المظمومة بالحركات المحمودة He said tawbah is when
		
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			a person makes tabdeel, which means to flip
		
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			something.
		
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			When a person exchanges or replaces all of
		
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			their actions and movements that are blameworthy, that
		
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			are not good, that are looked down upon
		
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			and they try their best to replace them
		
00:12:34 --> 00:12:37
			with movements that are in fact praiseworthy.
		
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			So let's read the commentary here of Dr.
		
00:12:41 --> 00:12:42
			Mustafa and what he says about this passage.
		
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			Because Imam Ghazali is very eloquent, he's very
		
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			flowery.
		
00:12:45 --> 00:12:47
			I didn't do a good job translating.
		
00:12:47 --> 00:12:49
			But he does a very good job of
		
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			giving you this incredible vision, right?
		
00:12:51 --> 00:12:53
			Of what it must mean to experience this.
		
00:12:54 --> 00:12:56
			So Dr. Mustafa, he says, The Prophet said
		
00:12:56 --> 00:13:00
			that all of the children of Adam, every
		
00:13:00 --> 00:13:03
			single man and woman are in fact sinners.
		
00:13:03 --> 00:13:04
			This is like a defined principle.
		
00:13:05 --> 00:13:06
			Every single person makes mistakes.
		
00:13:07 --> 00:13:08
			You can't escape it.
		
00:13:09 --> 00:13:11
			Perfection is not an option in this faith.
		
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			If a person thinks they're perfect, then they're
		
00:13:14 --> 00:13:15
			delusional, okay?
		
00:13:15 --> 00:13:17
			So that expectation is never asked.
		
00:13:17 --> 00:13:19
			You'll never find the Qur'an where Allah
		
00:13:19 --> 00:13:22
			says, Be perfect, O you who believe, be
		
00:13:22 --> 00:13:22
			perfect.
		
00:13:22 --> 00:13:23
			You'll never find that.
		
00:13:23 --> 00:13:25
			So that means number one, we should never
		
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			have that expectation of ourselves, ever.
		
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			Number two, if we are in the responsibility
		
00:13:31 --> 00:13:35
			chair of someone's life, we should never have
		
00:13:35 --> 00:13:36
			that expectation of them.
		
00:13:37 --> 00:13:40
			And many people, and I'm speaking now because
		
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			this is 30 and up, to the parents,
		
00:13:42 --> 00:13:42
			right?
		
00:13:42 --> 00:13:45
			Or to the spouses, or to any relationship
		
00:13:45 --> 00:13:45
			in your life.
		
00:13:45 --> 00:13:49
			When you have a expectation of perfection, you
		
00:13:49 --> 00:13:51
			are putting on to somebody what Allah Himself
		
00:13:51 --> 00:13:52
			has not put on to them.
		
00:13:53 --> 00:13:55
			And who are you and who am I?
		
00:13:56 --> 00:13:57
			You know, think of how, for example, we
		
00:13:57 --> 00:14:00
			think of, I don't know, like if somebody
		
00:14:00 --> 00:14:02
			is looking back and they're trying to do
		
00:14:02 --> 00:14:04
			some historical analysis of how their parents raised
		
00:14:04 --> 00:14:04
			them.
		
00:14:05 --> 00:14:06
			This is kind of the age where we
		
00:14:06 --> 00:14:06
			do that.
		
00:14:07 --> 00:14:08
			You're 30, you're like, I don't know if
		
00:14:08 --> 00:14:09
			I agree with everything, right?
		
00:14:10 --> 00:14:11
			I love my parents, but they did make
		
00:14:11 --> 00:14:12
			mistakes.
		
00:14:12 --> 00:14:14
			You know, like those kind of like disclaimers.
		
00:14:14 --> 00:14:16
			Like think about where those disclaimers even come
		
00:14:16 --> 00:14:17
			from.
		
00:14:17 --> 00:14:17
			It's understood.
		
00:14:18 --> 00:14:20
			It's ma'noom, like it's ma'roof, like
		
00:14:20 --> 00:14:20
			we get it.
		
00:14:21 --> 00:14:22
			Parents are not perfect.
		
00:14:22 --> 00:14:22
			We get it.
		
00:14:22 --> 00:14:23
			I'll tell you.
		
00:14:24 --> 00:14:26
			I'm a parent, I'm not perfect, right?
		
00:14:26 --> 00:14:28
			This gentle parent died a long time ago.
		
00:14:28 --> 00:14:29
			You know what I mean?
		
00:14:31 --> 00:14:32
			Every day at around 4 p.m., I
		
00:14:32 --> 00:14:34
			lose my, no, I'm joking, I'm joking, alhamdulillah.
		
00:14:36 --> 00:14:37
			But we understand.
		
00:14:37 --> 00:14:40
			And everyone who has like opinions about, it's
		
00:14:40 --> 00:14:42
			proof that they have not yet stepped into
		
00:14:42 --> 00:14:43
			the realm of that phase of their life,
		
00:14:44 --> 00:14:44
			right?
		
00:14:44 --> 00:14:46
			I always love when I hear people talk
		
00:14:46 --> 00:14:47
			about how they're going to be.
		
00:14:47 --> 00:14:48
			I take notes.
		
00:14:49 --> 00:14:51
			And then I show up when they reach
		
00:14:51 --> 00:14:52
			that stage and I'm like, wow, who's this
		
00:14:52 --> 00:14:52
			person?
		
00:14:53 --> 00:14:54
			Because I don't see that, right?
		
00:14:55 --> 00:14:56
			No screen time.
		
00:14:56 --> 00:14:58
			Your kid is a walking iPad, you know
		
00:14:58 --> 00:14:58
			what I mean?
		
00:14:58 --> 00:15:01
			And that's okay.
		
00:15:01 --> 00:15:02
			No judgment.
		
00:15:02 --> 00:15:04
			But look at how idealistic we can be
		
00:15:04 --> 00:15:06
			in the absence of reality, subhanallah.
		
00:15:07 --> 00:15:09
			How hypothetically perfect we think we are because
		
00:15:09 --> 00:15:10
			we set these expectations.
		
00:15:11 --> 00:15:12
			So here he says what?
		
00:15:12 --> 00:15:15
			Every son and daughter of Adam, all human
		
00:15:15 --> 00:15:16
			beings are all sinners.
		
00:15:16 --> 00:15:17
			The hadith of the Prophet ﷺ.
		
00:15:18 --> 00:15:19
			So don't expect people to be perfect.
		
00:15:20 --> 00:15:23
			Now, of course, there are some sins that
		
00:15:23 --> 00:15:25
			are transgressions upon others.
		
00:15:25 --> 00:15:26
			We don't excuse those.
		
00:15:27 --> 00:15:28
			No, we don't say, oh, it's fine.
		
00:15:28 --> 00:15:29
			Everyone's a sinner.
		
00:15:29 --> 00:15:30
			No, no, no, no, no.
		
00:15:30 --> 00:15:33
			If you wrong somebody, then it must be
		
00:15:33 --> 00:15:34
			corrected.
		
00:15:34 --> 00:15:35
			It must be corrected.
		
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			There's a difference.
		
00:15:37 --> 00:15:38
			But that's part of the exception.
		
00:15:39 --> 00:15:42
			The general rule in religion is every single
		
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			person makes mistakes.
		
00:15:44 --> 00:15:44
			We all do it.
		
00:15:45 --> 00:15:47
			But the Prophet ﷺ did not start, he
		
00:15:47 --> 00:15:48
			did not stop there.
		
00:15:48 --> 00:15:51
			Because if he stops there, we walk away
		
00:15:51 --> 00:15:53
			with this false sense of, okay, we're all
		
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			sinners.
		
00:15:54 --> 00:15:55
			High five.
		
00:15:55 --> 00:15:56
			Let's all sin together.
		
00:15:56 --> 00:15:56
			No.
		
00:15:57 --> 00:16:01
			He says, but the best of those people,
		
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			the best of those sinners, are the ones
		
00:16:04 --> 00:16:05
			who repent.
		
00:16:06 --> 00:16:08
			The ones who can actually like walk with
		
00:16:08 --> 00:16:10
			a little bit of pride, not bad pride,
		
00:16:10 --> 00:16:12
			but gratitude in Allah.
		
00:16:13 --> 00:16:14
			The ones who can walk with their head
		
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			up, right, not ashamed of their existence, but
		
00:16:17 --> 00:16:19
			happy that Allah has given them a second
		
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			chance, are those people that when they make
		
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			a mistake, they go back to Allah.
		
00:16:23 --> 00:16:24
			Subhanahu wa ta'ala.
		
00:16:24 --> 00:16:26
			He says people sin because of their human
		
00:16:26 --> 00:16:27
			weakness.
		
00:16:27 --> 00:16:29
			They sin because of their shortcomings.
		
00:16:30 --> 00:16:35
			Not because he says that Allah ta'ala
		
00:16:35 --> 00:16:37
			has forced you to do so.
		
00:16:37 --> 00:16:37
			No.
		
00:16:38 --> 00:16:39
			He says people sin because of their human
		
00:16:39 --> 00:16:40
			weakness.
		
00:16:41 --> 00:16:43
			He says also in our religion, in Islam,
		
00:16:43 --> 00:16:45
			there's no concept of an inherited sin.
		
00:16:46 --> 00:16:48
			The original sin is not something that we
		
00:16:48 --> 00:16:48
			believe in.
		
00:16:49 --> 00:16:51
			We don't believe that human beings sin because
		
00:16:51 --> 00:16:54
			of the original slip, right?
		
00:16:54 --> 00:16:56
			We believe that human beings make mistakes because
		
00:16:56 --> 00:16:57
			of what we are, who we are.
		
00:16:58 --> 00:16:59
			We're creation.
		
00:16:59 --> 00:17:01
			The only thing that's perfect is the creator.
		
00:17:02 --> 00:17:04
			It's basic belief in Allah 101.
		
00:17:04 --> 00:17:06
			Allah is the only perfect being.
		
00:17:07 --> 00:17:10
			Everything else besides Allah has imperfections.
		
00:17:10 --> 00:17:13
			I don't mean imperfections like in design, but
		
00:17:13 --> 00:17:14
			what I mean is imperfections meaning that we
		
00:17:14 --> 00:17:15
			all slip.
		
00:17:16 --> 00:17:18
			Okay, that's the nature of our creation, our
		
00:17:18 --> 00:17:18
			created being.
		
00:17:18 --> 00:17:22
			He says the result of Adam and Eve
		
00:17:22 --> 00:17:25
			eating from the forbidden tree in the garden
		
00:17:25 --> 00:17:28
			has nothing to do with our existence, right?
		
00:17:28 --> 00:17:29
			We don't inherit that.
		
00:17:29 --> 00:17:32
			In fact, the very first story in the
		
00:17:32 --> 00:17:35
			Qur'an, think of this, is the story
		
00:17:35 --> 00:17:39
			of the exoneration of Hawa from the burden
		
00:17:39 --> 00:17:41
			of being the first one to eat from
		
00:17:41 --> 00:17:41
			this tree.
		
00:17:42 --> 00:17:44
			The Qur'an exonerates her from that claim.
		
00:17:45 --> 00:17:48
			It exonerates from this idea that this is
		
00:17:48 --> 00:17:51
			something that has fallen down into the lap
		
00:17:51 --> 00:17:52
			of every human being.
		
00:17:53 --> 00:17:56
			The Holy Qur'an, when describing the mistake,
		
00:17:57 --> 00:17:59
			when describing the eating of the tree, uses
		
00:17:59 --> 00:18:00
			the dual pronoun.
		
00:18:01 --> 00:18:03
			It describes it as, right?
		
00:18:04 --> 00:18:06
			فَأَزَّلَّهُمَا It describes both of them, not one
		
00:18:06 --> 00:18:06
			of them.
		
00:18:06 --> 00:18:08
			It doesn't assign it to any one person
		
00:18:08 --> 00:18:09
			in that moment.
		
00:18:10 --> 00:18:12
			So, they were both tempted, and they both
		
00:18:12 --> 00:18:16
			succumbed to the temptation, and Shaytan was the
		
00:18:16 --> 00:18:19
			one who then caused their expulsion from the
		
00:18:19 --> 00:18:19
			garden.
		
00:18:19 --> 00:18:20
			But now, here's the crazy part.
		
00:18:21 --> 00:18:22
			Crazy here in a good way, sorry.
		
00:18:23 --> 00:18:26
			When Allah سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى When Allah سُبْحَانَهُ
		
00:18:26 --> 00:18:31
			وَ تَعَالَى asked Adam عَيْسَلَام or addressed Adam
		
00:18:31 --> 00:18:36
			عَيْسَلَام about this slip, there's a really interesting
		
00:18:36 --> 00:18:41
			kind of, there's a wording that's used that
		
00:18:41 --> 00:18:42
			you might skip over if you're just reading
		
00:18:42 --> 00:18:43
			it quickly.
		
00:18:43 --> 00:18:45
			So the story goes, Adam and Eve ate
		
00:18:45 --> 00:18:47
			from the tree, and then they repented to
		
00:18:47 --> 00:18:49
			Allah, and that's it, right?
		
00:18:49 --> 00:18:50
			Alhamdulillah, that's good.
		
00:18:51 --> 00:18:53
			But the way that the repentance was given
		
00:18:54 --> 00:18:59
			was Allah says, فَتَلَقَّ آدَمٌ مِنْ رَبِّهِ كَلِيمَاتٍ
		
00:18:59 --> 00:19:03
			فَتَابَ عَلَيْهِ Adam was given some words from
		
00:19:03 --> 00:19:06
			his Lord, and as a result repented.
		
00:19:09 --> 00:19:13
			فَتَلَقَّ آدَمٌ مِنْ رَبِّهِ كَلِيمَاتٍ فَتَابَ عَلَيْهِ Allah
		
00:19:13 --> 00:19:17
			Ta'ala gave Adam some words, and Adam
		
00:19:17 --> 00:19:17
			repented.
		
00:19:18 --> 00:19:21
			The tafsir says that this means that Allah
		
00:19:21 --> 00:19:25
			gave Adam the dua of istighfar, of tawbah,
		
00:19:25 --> 00:19:26
			in that moment.
		
00:19:26 --> 00:19:27
			Up until then he didn't need it, he
		
00:19:27 --> 00:19:28
			never made a mistake before.
		
00:19:29 --> 00:19:32
			If Allah gives the dua for repentance, what
		
00:19:32 --> 00:19:33
			does that mean about what Allah wants?
		
00:19:33 --> 00:19:35
			What does that mean?
		
00:19:37 --> 00:19:40
			Allah wants Adam to repent, because Allah wants
		
00:19:40 --> 00:19:42
			to accept the repentance.
		
00:19:42 --> 00:19:46
			فَتَابَ عَلَيْهِ So Allah does not set somebody
		
00:19:46 --> 00:19:48
			else up to ask for something that he's
		
00:19:48 --> 00:19:49
			gonna reject.
		
00:19:49 --> 00:19:50
			That's not how He operates.
		
00:19:50 --> 00:19:51
			That's how we...
		
00:19:51 --> 00:19:51
			we're petty.
		
00:19:52 --> 00:19:53
			We're like, you want this?
		
00:19:53 --> 00:19:53
			Ask.
		
00:19:53 --> 00:19:54
			Can I have it?
		
00:19:54 --> 00:19:55
			No, you can't.
		
00:19:55 --> 00:19:57
			That's petty, that's human behavior.
		
00:19:57 --> 00:20:00
			Allah, He sets you up for success.
		
00:20:00 --> 00:20:01
			So He gives Adam, peace be upon him,
		
00:20:02 --> 00:20:02
			the dua.
		
00:20:03 --> 00:20:05
			And later in the Quran, that dua was
		
00:20:05 --> 00:20:06
			taught to us where?
		
00:20:06 --> 00:20:07
			What does it say?
		
00:20:08 --> 00:20:10
			Oh Allah, forgive us.
		
00:20:11 --> 00:20:13
			Adam's dua very famously is what?
		
00:20:14 --> 00:20:19
			رَبَّنَا ظَلَمْنَا أَنفُسَنَا وَإِلَّمْ تَغْفِرْ لَنَا وَتَرْحَمْنَا
		
00:20:19 --> 00:20:24
			لَنَكُنَنَا مِنِ الْخَاسِرِينَ Oh Allah, we have wronged
		
00:20:24 --> 00:20:24
			ourselves.
		
00:20:25 --> 00:20:26
			Which is the first, by the way, step
		
00:20:26 --> 00:20:27
			in tawbah.
		
00:20:27 --> 00:20:28
			You have to admit it, you have to
		
00:20:28 --> 00:20:29
			own it.
		
00:20:29 --> 00:20:32
			You can't ever sincerely feel the pain of
		
00:20:32 --> 00:20:34
			regret if you think it was someone else's
		
00:20:34 --> 00:20:34
			fault.
		
00:20:35 --> 00:20:36
			It's not possible.
		
00:20:36 --> 00:20:39
			If you constantly have a way to point
		
00:20:39 --> 00:20:40
			the finger at somebody else, there's no way
		
00:20:40 --> 00:20:43
			you're gonna feel that ache that he's talking
		
00:20:43 --> 00:20:43
			about.
		
00:20:43 --> 00:20:50
			رَبَّنَا ظَلَمْنَا أَنفُسَنَا وَإِلَّمْ تَغْفِرْ لَنَا وَتَرْحَمْنَا And
		
00:20:50 --> 00:20:53
			if you do not, forgive us and have
		
00:20:53 --> 00:20:53
			mercy on us.
		
00:20:54 --> 00:20:55
			So now what's Adam, peace be upon him,
		
00:20:55 --> 00:20:55
			doing?
		
00:20:56 --> 00:21:00
			Adam is entertaining, he's hypothesizing what's at stake.
		
00:21:02 --> 00:21:04
			He's talking to Allah.
		
00:21:04 --> 00:21:06
			Oh Allah, forgive us please.
		
00:21:06 --> 00:21:07
			But he's not just stopping there.
		
00:21:08 --> 00:21:09
			You know, we say Astaghfirullah and then we
		
00:21:09 --> 00:21:09
			move on.
		
00:21:10 --> 00:21:11
			And then we wonder why we don't have
		
00:21:11 --> 00:21:13
			tears, we wonder why our heart doesn't feel
		
00:21:13 --> 00:21:13
			it.
		
00:21:13 --> 00:21:14
			Astaghfirullah, Astaghfirullah.
		
00:21:14 --> 00:21:14
			No.
		
00:21:15 --> 00:21:16
			Look at how he's asking.
		
00:21:16 --> 00:21:18
			Oh Allah, please forgive me.
		
00:21:19 --> 00:21:21
			Semicolon, right, dot, semicolon.
		
00:21:22 --> 00:21:25
			If you don't, what happens if you don't?
		
00:21:27 --> 00:21:30
			لَنَكُنَّنَّ مِنِ الْخَاسِرِينَ We will be destroyed.
		
00:21:31 --> 00:21:32
			We'll be done.
		
00:21:33 --> 00:21:33
			We have no hope.
		
00:21:35 --> 00:21:38
			You know, it's only at the prospect of
		
00:21:38 --> 00:21:40
			the worst fear that you have that you
		
00:21:40 --> 00:21:41
			start to feel something.
		
00:21:42 --> 00:21:45
			The moment that a person starts to recognize
		
00:21:45 --> 00:21:48
			that your fear can come true is when
		
00:21:48 --> 00:21:50
			you start to feel that turning in your
		
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			chest.
		
00:21:51 --> 00:21:52
			That's why when people say, how do I
		
00:21:52 --> 00:21:52
			make du'a?
		
00:21:52 --> 00:21:53
			My du'a feels flat.
		
00:21:53 --> 00:21:55
			I say there's four things.
		
00:21:55 --> 00:21:57
			Number one, what you're grateful for.
		
00:21:58 --> 00:22:00
			Number one, what you're sorry for, what you
		
00:22:00 --> 00:22:00
			regret.
		
00:22:01 --> 00:22:02
			Number two, number three, sorry.
		
00:22:02 --> 00:22:03
			Did I say number one twice?
		
00:22:03 --> 00:22:05
			Number one, it's been a long day, guys.
		
00:22:06 --> 00:22:07
			Number one, what you're grateful for.
		
00:22:07 --> 00:22:10
			Number two, what you are sorry for, what
		
00:22:10 --> 00:22:11
			you regret the most.
		
00:22:11 --> 00:22:13
			Number three, what your greatest hopes are.
		
00:22:13 --> 00:22:15
			And number four, what your greatest fears are.
		
00:22:16 --> 00:22:19
			And in the combination of these four categories,
		
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			if your heart doesn't move, it absolutely will
		
00:22:23 --> 00:22:24
			move.
		
00:22:24 --> 00:22:26
			If you spend time thinking about what you're
		
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			most grateful for or what you're most apologetic
		
00:22:28 --> 00:22:29
			for, to Allah.
		
00:22:29 --> 00:22:31
			This is not for somebody else.
		
00:22:31 --> 00:22:31
			This is for you and Allah.
		
00:22:32 --> 00:22:33
			What your greatest hopes are.
		
00:22:34 --> 00:22:35
			Think about what your hopes are.
		
00:22:35 --> 00:22:37
			I'm not talking about like the low-hanging
		
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			stuff.
		
00:22:38 --> 00:22:39
			Although that's fine too.
		
00:22:39 --> 00:22:40
			You can include everything.
		
00:22:40 --> 00:22:41
			But try to think deeply.
		
00:22:42 --> 00:22:44
			What are your greatest hopes?
		
00:22:44 --> 00:22:45
			You know, a lot of people say things
		
00:22:45 --> 00:22:46
			like, oh, I want this or I want
		
00:22:46 --> 00:22:46
			that.
		
00:22:46 --> 00:22:49
			Almost treating it like an age shopping list.
		
00:22:49 --> 00:22:50
			What's your greatest hope?
		
00:22:50 --> 00:22:51
			PS5?
		
00:22:51 --> 00:22:53
			No, like what's really your greatest hope?
		
00:22:53 --> 00:22:54
			Okay, an Xbox.
		
00:22:54 --> 00:22:56
			No, like really.
		
00:22:56 --> 00:22:57
			Dig deep.
		
00:22:57 --> 00:22:58
			What is your greatest hope?
		
00:23:00 --> 00:23:01
			Even people say, oh, I want to get
		
00:23:01 --> 00:23:01
			married.
		
00:23:02 --> 00:23:03
			But what?
		
00:23:04 --> 00:23:06
			Instead of saying, oh Allah, I desire companionship.
		
00:23:08 --> 00:23:09
			What's your greatest fear?
		
00:23:09 --> 00:23:10
			To be alone.
		
00:23:11 --> 00:23:14
			Like think about the difference between my greatest
		
00:23:14 --> 00:23:16
			fear is never getting married versus my greatest
		
00:23:16 --> 00:23:18
			fear is being alone for the rest of
		
00:23:18 --> 00:23:20
			my life and never having someone to share
		
00:23:20 --> 00:23:21
			these moments with.
		
00:23:22 --> 00:23:25
			The difference is so stark, subhanAllah.
		
00:23:26 --> 00:23:28
			So the dua, like if I feel like,
		
00:23:28 --> 00:23:29
			oh, I'm not making dua, it's not hitting
		
00:23:29 --> 00:23:29
			me.
		
00:23:30 --> 00:23:32
			Think about how you're, are you investing any
		
00:23:32 --> 00:23:33
			time into thinking about these things?
		
00:23:33 --> 00:23:35
			Look at the duas of the Quran.
		
00:23:35 --> 00:23:39
			رَبَّنَا ظَلَمْنَا أَنفُسَنَا Oh Allah, I've wronged myself.
		
00:23:39 --> 00:23:40
			We've wronged ourselves.
		
00:23:41 --> 00:23:43
			The humility that must be felt from the
		
00:23:43 --> 00:23:44
			heart of a person that's admitting fault.
		
00:23:44 --> 00:23:47
			وَإِلَّمْ تَغْفِرْ لَنَا وَتَرْحَمْنَا If you don't forgive
		
00:23:47 --> 00:23:49
			us, لَنَكُنَنَ مِنَ الْخَاسِرِينَ We're done.
		
00:23:50 --> 00:23:50
			We're done.
		
00:23:52 --> 00:23:55
			You can imagine the feeling in the heart
		
00:23:55 --> 00:23:57
			of Sayyidina Adam as he's saying these words.
		
00:23:58 --> 00:24:00
			Allah Ta'ala taught him the process of
		
00:24:00 --> 00:24:02
			how to seek forgiveness, how to repent.
		
00:24:03 --> 00:24:04
			And as a result of that, Allah Ta
		
00:24:04 --> 00:24:05
			'ala forgave him.
		
00:24:06 --> 00:24:09
			Allah Ta'ala, Adam received revealed words and
		
00:24:09 --> 00:24:09
			Allah forgave him.
		
00:24:09 --> 00:24:12
			And these words explained to Adam the possibility
		
00:24:12 --> 00:24:14
			of repentance as well as how to repent.
		
00:24:15 --> 00:24:18
			He says every human being is born clean
		
00:24:18 --> 00:24:19
			from any baggage.
		
00:24:19 --> 00:24:22
			And every single person is responsible for his
		
00:24:22 --> 00:24:23
			or her own sins.
		
00:24:25 --> 00:24:27
			One of the really really scary passages in
		
00:24:27 --> 00:24:31
			Surah Qaf is when we'll be standing in
		
00:24:31 --> 00:24:32
			the court of Allah.
		
00:24:33 --> 00:24:35
			I want you to imagine this.
		
00:24:36 --> 00:24:37
			We'll be standing in the court of Allah
		
00:24:37 --> 00:24:38
			Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala.
		
00:24:38 --> 00:24:43
			And in that moment of standing, every individual
		
00:24:43 --> 00:24:45
			in that moment will be on their own
		
00:24:45 --> 00:24:48
			in the court of God.
		
00:24:49 --> 00:24:51
			And the only thing, the only creature that
		
00:24:51 --> 00:24:55
			will be there is the Shaytan.
		
00:24:56 --> 00:25:00
			And in that moment, the human being will
		
00:25:00 --> 00:25:03
			try to actually take all their mistakes and
		
00:25:03 --> 00:25:03
			blame it on Shaytan.
		
00:25:04 --> 00:25:06
			They'll try to say, I didn't do it.
		
00:25:06 --> 00:25:07
			It was him.
		
00:25:08 --> 00:25:09
			He's the one.
		
00:25:09 --> 00:25:14
			He came, he whispered to me, he's the
		
00:25:14 --> 00:25:15
			one who pushed me to do this.
		
00:25:17 --> 00:25:19
			And Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala will actually,
		
00:25:20 --> 00:25:23
			Shaytan in that moment will say, I didn't
		
00:25:23 --> 00:25:25
			force you to do anything.
		
00:25:26 --> 00:25:28
			I didn't do anything to you.
		
00:25:29 --> 00:25:29
			He'll say what?
		
00:25:29 --> 00:25:35
			He'll say, I didn't do anything.
		
00:25:35 --> 00:25:36
			I didn't do anything.
		
00:25:36 --> 00:25:38
			This person made the mistakes on their own.
		
00:25:38 --> 00:25:41
			I just gave them a little, like a
		
00:25:41 --> 00:25:42
			little nudge.
		
00:25:43 --> 00:25:44
			That's it.
		
00:25:44 --> 00:25:45
			Right?
		
00:25:45 --> 00:25:47
			That's why actually in the Quran, Allah says
		
00:25:47 --> 00:25:49
			the one who whispers into the chest of
		
00:25:49 --> 00:25:52
			humankind, not the hearts, because the heart is
		
00:25:52 --> 00:25:52
			the decision maker.
		
00:25:53 --> 00:25:54
			If Shaytan put it right in your heart,
		
00:25:54 --> 00:25:55
			you'd have no choice.
		
00:25:56 --> 00:25:58
			Shaytan just fills the cavity where your heart
		
00:25:58 --> 00:25:59
			is, the chest.
		
00:26:01 --> 00:26:03
			Because he surrounds your heart, but your heart
		
00:26:03 --> 00:26:04
			is the one that decides yes or no.
		
00:26:05 --> 00:26:07
			And if the heart is strong, blocks it
		
00:26:07 --> 00:26:08
			out.
		
00:26:08 --> 00:26:10
			If the heart is weak, it seems tempting.
		
00:26:12 --> 00:26:14
			So Shaytan will say, listen to this.
		
00:26:14 --> 00:26:18
			We all know Allah hates Shaytan, he's the
		
00:26:18 --> 00:26:18
			accursed one.
		
00:26:19 --> 00:26:21
			We know that Shaytan has no favor with
		
00:26:21 --> 00:26:22
			Allah, we know this.
		
00:26:23 --> 00:26:25
			But on that day, Allah will say to
		
00:26:25 --> 00:26:27
			Shaytan, you're right.
		
00:26:28 --> 00:26:29
			You're right.
		
00:26:30 --> 00:26:31
			It's not your fault.
		
00:26:32 --> 00:26:34
			This person ultimately made their own choice.
		
00:26:35 --> 00:26:37
			This person made their bed, now they have
		
00:26:37 --> 00:26:37
			to lie in it.
		
00:26:38 --> 00:26:39
			That's the reality that's going to be on
		
00:26:39 --> 00:26:40
			the Day of Judgment.
		
00:26:40 --> 00:26:41
			May Allah protect us.
		
00:26:42 --> 00:26:46
			And so this idea, this thought that, oh,
		
00:26:46 --> 00:26:47
			I can get away from repenting just by
		
00:26:47 --> 00:26:50
			blaming somebody else or something else, it's not
		
00:26:50 --> 00:26:51
			going to happen.
		
00:26:52 --> 00:26:53
			It's not going to happen.
		
00:26:54 --> 00:26:56
			So he says, every human being is responsible
		
00:26:56 --> 00:26:57
			for their own sins.
		
00:26:57 --> 00:26:59
			And while it's most likely that people will
		
00:26:59 --> 00:27:01
			sin, they will make mistakes.
		
00:27:02 --> 00:27:04
			It is important that they learn about the
		
00:27:04 --> 00:27:06
			sins in order to avoid them.
		
00:27:06 --> 00:27:07
			We talked about this last night at HeartWork
		
00:27:07 --> 00:27:07
			actually.
		
00:27:08 --> 00:27:11
			Ibn Qayyim, he actually diagrams the whole life
		
00:27:11 --> 00:27:11
			of a sin.
		
00:27:12 --> 00:27:14
			And he says it starts with a faint
		
00:27:14 --> 00:27:16
			whisper in the mind or the heart of
		
00:27:16 --> 00:27:18
			a person in the chest, like an impulsive
		
00:27:18 --> 00:27:18
			thought.
		
00:27:18 --> 00:27:20
			It continues on and becomes an intention.
		
00:27:21 --> 00:27:23
			It continues on and becomes a strategy.
		
00:27:23 --> 00:27:25
			It continues on and becomes a plan, like
		
00:27:25 --> 00:27:26
			a fully formed plan.
		
00:27:26 --> 00:27:28
			And then it becomes the action or the
		
00:27:28 --> 00:27:29
			words itself.
		
00:27:30 --> 00:27:33
			So Ibn Qayyim says, many of us try
		
00:27:33 --> 00:27:34
			to stop the sin and the last one.
		
00:27:35 --> 00:27:37
			Like we've already done all the work and
		
00:27:37 --> 00:27:38
			now we're like, no, I can't do this.
		
00:27:39 --> 00:27:40
			The momentum is really difficult.
		
00:27:41 --> 00:27:43
			The momentum is really tough.
		
00:27:43 --> 00:27:45
			So Ibn Qayyim says, if you really want
		
00:27:45 --> 00:27:47
			to stop the sin, you've got to stop
		
00:27:47 --> 00:27:48
			it in the first stage.
		
00:27:48 --> 00:27:51
			As soon as you have that thought, as
		
00:27:51 --> 00:27:55
			soon as you have that flicker of sin,
		
00:27:55 --> 00:27:57
			you say, أَعُوذُ بِاللَّهِ مِنَ الشَّيْطَانِ الرَّجِيمِ You
		
00:27:57 --> 00:28:02
			change the entire landscape of the context of
		
00:28:02 --> 00:28:04
			where the sin is trying to plant itself.
		
00:28:05 --> 00:28:06
			You say, no, I'm not accepting it.
		
00:28:07 --> 00:28:07
			You're rejected.
		
00:28:07 --> 00:28:09
			I want to have nothing to do with
		
00:28:09 --> 00:28:09
			you.
		
00:28:09 --> 00:28:10
			Right?
		
00:28:10 --> 00:28:15
			This is why when people have behavioral catalysts
		
00:28:15 --> 00:28:21
			for sins, certain places, certain times, certain things,
		
00:28:21 --> 00:28:24
			certain challenges, it's important literally, the Prophet ﷺ
		
00:28:24 --> 00:28:26
			said, get up and leave the gathering.
		
00:28:26 --> 00:28:27
			Get up and leave the environment.
		
00:28:27 --> 00:28:28
			Get up and change your environment.
		
00:28:29 --> 00:28:31
			You can't rely on yourself to be strong
		
00:28:31 --> 00:28:31
			in those situations.
		
00:28:33 --> 00:28:34
			Because we're not.
		
00:28:35 --> 00:28:35
			We're not.
		
00:28:36 --> 00:28:39
			If every time I'm in an argument, I
		
00:28:39 --> 00:28:41
			resort to bad language, don't expect yourself to
		
00:28:41 --> 00:28:42
			become a saint.
		
00:28:42 --> 00:28:44
			All of a sudden, the next argument, person's
		
00:28:44 --> 00:28:48
			arguing, you're like, that's not you.
		
00:28:49 --> 00:28:50
			I'm sorry.
		
00:28:51 --> 00:28:52
			Everyone lives aspirationally.
		
00:28:53 --> 00:28:54
			Maybe one day I can be like this.
		
00:28:54 --> 00:28:54
			No.
		
00:28:55 --> 00:28:55
			Be smart.
		
00:28:56 --> 00:28:57
			Be smart.
		
00:28:57 --> 00:29:00
			If you know that browsing on the app
		
00:29:00 --> 00:29:01
			is going to make you buy some stuff,
		
00:29:02 --> 00:29:03
			delete the app.
		
00:29:04 --> 00:29:05
			Close it down.
		
00:29:05 --> 00:29:08
			If you know that scrolling is going to
		
00:29:08 --> 00:29:09
			cause you to look at something you shouldn't
		
00:29:09 --> 00:29:12
			look at, get rid of the phone.
		
00:29:12 --> 00:29:13
			Put it in a different room.
		
00:29:13 --> 00:29:14
			Put it somewhere else.
		
00:29:15 --> 00:29:16
			I mean literally, this is what, you know,
		
00:29:16 --> 00:29:20
			subhanAllah, the * addiction that is rampant in
		
00:29:20 --> 00:29:24
			society, now you have, not Muslims, not even
		
00:29:24 --> 00:29:28
			religious people, you have physicians, doctors, pediatricians that
		
00:29:28 --> 00:29:28
			are saying what?
		
00:29:29 --> 00:29:30
			No screens in the bedroom.
		
00:29:32 --> 00:29:33
			Like atheists.
		
00:29:34 --> 00:29:34
			No screens.
		
00:29:35 --> 00:29:35
			Why?
		
00:29:36 --> 00:29:38
			Because not God is watching.
		
00:29:38 --> 00:29:39
			You know, like, I don't know, like, they
		
00:29:39 --> 00:29:42
			don't even have, they just know that the
		
00:29:42 --> 00:29:44
			only way to accomplish that goal is by
		
00:29:44 --> 00:29:44
			what?
		
00:29:44 --> 00:29:46
			Is by not putting yourself in the environment
		
00:29:46 --> 00:29:48
			where that behavior is common.
		
00:29:49 --> 00:29:51
			Don't expect that you can, and Ibn Qayyim
		
00:29:51 --> 00:29:52
			told us this a thousand years ago.
		
00:29:53 --> 00:29:54
			Don't expect that you're going to be able
		
00:29:54 --> 00:29:55
			to conquer yourself in that moment.
		
00:29:56 --> 00:29:58
			Remove yourself from the pathway altogether.
		
00:29:58 --> 00:30:01
			So he says, learn about the sins.
		
00:30:02 --> 00:30:03
			Reflect on them.
		
00:30:03 --> 00:30:05
			What causes me to do these things?
		
00:30:05 --> 00:30:07
			If there's a certain group of people that
		
00:30:07 --> 00:30:09
			when you're around them, the topic is always
		
00:30:09 --> 00:30:11
			backbiting, figure out how to change that.
		
00:30:13 --> 00:30:15
			One should know that repentance is the way
		
00:30:15 --> 00:30:17
			out of a sinful life, and Allah Ta
		
00:30:17 --> 00:30:19
			'ala is the one who forgives because we
		
00:30:19 --> 00:30:20
			sin often.
		
00:30:20 --> 00:30:22
			The Prophet, peace be upon him, he once
		
00:30:22 --> 00:30:24
			reprimanded, this is an amazing story, he once
		
00:30:24 --> 00:30:28
			reprimanded one of the companions for drinking.
		
00:30:28 --> 00:30:29
			This story is incredible.
		
00:30:29 --> 00:30:31
			There was a companion that was caught drinking.
		
00:30:32 --> 00:30:34
			Okay, this is in the time after drinking
		
00:30:34 --> 00:30:35
			was prohibited.
		
00:30:35 --> 00:30:37
			Okay, can you imagine, you know, how many
		
00:30:37 --> 00:30:39
			of you have ever thought, raise your hand.
		
00:30:39 --> 00:30:40
			Not yet.
		
00:30:41 --> 00:30:42
			It wasn't a command.
		
00:30:42 --> 00:30:43
			It was leading up to something.
		
00:30:43 --> 00:30:45
			Okay, how many of you have ever thought,
		
00:30:45 --> 00:30:48
			man, if only I lived with the Prophet,
		
00:30:49 --> 00:30:50
			peace be upon him, I would be amazing.
		
00:30:51 --> 00:30:52
			Raise your hand if you felt that way.
		
00:30:52 --> 00:30:54
			Like if I live there, none of this,
		
00:30:54 --> 00:30:56
			this garbage insan that you see right now,
		
00:30:57 --> 00:30:57
			no.
		
00:30:57 --> 00:31:00
			If I was with him, I would never
		
00:31:00 --> 00:31:00
			sin ever.
		
00:31:00 --> 00:31:02
			I would just be constantly in his company.
		
00:31:03 --> 00:31:04
			We all, you think that, it's natural.
		
00:31:05 --> 00:31:06
			If I lived in Medina 1400 years ago,
		
00:31:07 --> 00:31:09
			man, I mean think about this, you go
		
00:31:09 --> 00:31:11
			to Umrah now and you're like, I'm perfect.
		
00:31:12 --> 00:31:13
			I have no sins.
		
00:31:14 --> 00:31:16
			And by the way, that's the power of
		
00:31:16 --> 00:31:16
			that journey.
		
00:31:16 --> 00:31:17
			May Allah invite us all.
		
00:31:18 --> 00:31:19
			It's an amazing journey.
		
00:31:19 --> 00:31:21
			It really gives you a perspective of the
		
00:31:21 --> 00:31:22
			best version of yourself, subhanallah.
		
00:31:23 --> 00:31:24
			You think to yourself, oh, if I live
		
00:31:24 --> 00:31:25
			with him, I'd be perfect.
		
00:31:25 --> 00:31:27
			That's why these stories of companions are so
		
00:31:27 --> 00:31:27
			amazing.
		
00:31:27 --> 00:31:29
			Because there was a companion that got caught
		
00:31:29 --> 00:31:29
			drinking.
		
00:31:30 --> 00:31:33
			And when he got caught drinking, it was
		
00:31:33 --> 00:31:35
			a big shame, right?
		
00:31:36 --> 00:31:37
			But he had this struggle, subhanallah.
		
00:31:39 --> 00:31:40
			And so one of the other companions got
		
00:31:40 --> 00:31:45
			so upset with him that while they were
		
00:31:45 --> 00:31:50
			administering the punishment, he screamed, the other companions
		
00:31:50 --> 00:31:51
			screamed at him.
		
00:31:52 --> 00:31:56
			And he said, May Allah's curse be upon
		
00:31:56 --> 00:31:58
			you, you sinful person.
		
00:31:59 --> 00:31:59
			Right?
		
00:31:59 --> 00:32:01
			Just kind of like piling it on, you
		
00:32:01 --> 00:32:01
			know?
		
00:32:02 --> 00:32:04
			And you would think to yourself, in an
		
00:32:04 --> 00:32:07
			environment so pure, so prophetic, if somebody were
		
00:32:07 --> 00:32:11
			caught doing such a horrific thing, drinking alcohol
		
00:32:11 --> 00:32:13
			in Medina, a neighbor of the Prophet, peace
		
00:32:13 --> 00:32:15
			be upon him, drinking, that when the person
		
00:32:15 --> 00:32:18
			says, May Allah's curse be upon you, all
		
00:32:18 --> 00:32:20
			the other companions are like, yeah.
		
00:32:20 --> 00:32:22
			And the Prophet, peace be upon him, is
		
00:32:22 --> 00:32:24
			like, you know, shame on you, man.
		
00:32:25 --> 00:32:26
			You know what the Prophet, peace be upon
		
00:32:26 --> 00:32:26
			him, he did?
		
00:32:27 --> 00:32:30
			The hadith says that his face changed color,
		
00:32:31 --> 00:32:33
			which is the description that is given very
		
00:32:33 --> 00:32:35
			rarely, but it's given when he's very angry.
		
00:32:35 --> 00:32:39
			And one of the narration says that his
		
00:32:39 --> 00:32:42
			vein in his temple started to appear, which
		
00:32:42 --> 00:32:43
			also means he's very upset.
		
00:32:44 --> 00:32:45
			Isn't that interesting?
		
00:32:45 --> 00:32:47
			And he looks at the person who cursed
		
00:32:47 --> 00:32:51
			this companion, and he said to him, Take
		
00:32:51 --> 00:32:52
			that back.
		
00:32:53 --> 00:32:53
			Why?
		
00:32:54 --> 00:32:57
			Because he loves Allah and his Messenger.
		
00:32:59 --> 00:33:00
			Full stop.
		
00:33:00 --> 00:33:01
			Take that back.
		
00:33:02 --> 00:33:05
			Take the curse back, because he loves Allah
		
00:33:05 --> 00:33:05
			and his Messenger.
		
00:33:07 --> 00:33:09
			The Prophet, peace be upon him, did not
		
00:33:09 --> 00:33:12
			display any anger at the one who was
		
00:33:12 --> 00:33:14
			actually caught drinking.
		
00:33:15 --> 00:33:16
			He didn't scream at him.
		
00:33:16 --> 00:33:17
			He didn't do anything.
		
00:33:18 --> 00:33:20
			The goal of the punishment was not to
		
00:33:20 --> 00:33:21
			affect a personal vendetta.
		
00:33:21 --> 00:33:22
			It was to change his behavior.
		
00:33:23 --> 00:33:25
			But the minute that it became personal, the
		
00:33:25 --> 00:33:26
			Prophet, peace be upon him, reprimanded that person
		
00:33:26 --> 00:33:29
			and said, Don't ever curse somebody because you
		
00:33:29 --> 00:33:31
			don't know that their tawbah may have been
		
00:33:31 --> 00:33:31
			accepted.
		
00:33:32 --> 00:33:34
			And now you're cursing a person that's a
		
00:33:34 --> 00:33:34
			saint.
		
00:33:34 --> 00:33:35
			A saint in the eyes of Allah is
		
00:33:35 --> 00:33:36
			accepted.
		
00:33:36 --> 00:33:38
			He loves Allah and he loves his Messenger.
		
00:33:39 --> 00:33:42
			Dr. Mustafa says, This is not to encourage
		
00:33:42 --> 00:33:42
			the wrongdoing.
		
00:33:43 --> 00:33:45
			The Prophet, peace be upon him, is not
		
00:33:45 --> 00:33:46
			like winking at the guy like, You're good.
		
00:33:49 --> 00:33:50
			That's not what he's doing.
		
00:33:51 --> 00:33:53
			But what he's doing is he's saying, You
		
00:33:53 --> 00:33:56
			have to show mercy to when a person
		
00:33:56 --> 00:33:57
			makes a mistake in their life.
		
00:33:58 --> 00:34:01
			Part of the reason why culturally tawbah is
		
00:34:01 --> 00:34:06
			such a difficult topic is because think about
		
00:34:06 --> 00:34:08
			how mistakes were taught to you.
		
00:34:09 --> 00:34:11
			Think about how we teach mistakes.
		
00:34:13 --> 00:34:16
			Mistakes, you know, in corporate, like in the
		
00:34:16 --> 00:34:18
			corporate workspace, mistakes are like, it's a learning
		
00:34:18 --> 00:34:19
			opportunity.
		
00:34:20 --> 00:34:21
			You know, and everyone's like, Wow, that's so
		
00:34:21 --> 00:34:22
			refreshing.
		
00:34:23 --> 00:34:24
			I'm not in trouble.
		
00:34:24 --> 00:34:25
			No, what'd you learn?
		
00:34:25 --> 00:34:27
			You know, let's sit down.
		
00:34:27 --> 00:34:27
			Let's have a one on one.
		
00:34:28 --> 00:34:28
			What'd you learn?
		
00:34:28 --> 00:34:32
			You know, and that's good.
		
00:34:32 --> 00:34:34
			That's actually something very refreshing because the person
		
00:34:34 --> 00:34:37
			is not utterly deathly afraid of failing.
		
00:34:38 --> 00:34:41
			But when it comes to like personal, you
		
00:34:41 --> 00:34:43
			know, religious affairs, if a person makes a
		
00:34:43 --> 00:34:45
			mistake, it's like, You're done.
		
00:34:46 --> 00:34:47
			You're done.
		
00:34:48 --> 00:34:49
			I don't know about, you know, for me,
		
00:34:49 --> 00:34:50
			my mother's Egyptian.
		
00:34:50 --> 00:34:51
			So the Arabs, they kind of have a
		
00:34:51 --> 00:34:54
			very interesting way of expressing disappointment.
		
00:34:55 --> 00:34:57
			You know, like if I made a mistake,
		
00:34:57 --> 00:34:58
			if you're Egyptian, you know.
		
00:34:58 --> 00:35:00
			If I made a mistake, right?
		
00:35:00 --> 00:35:01
			My mom is amazing, by the way.
		
00:35:02 --> 00:35:03
			I just started earlier by talking about Naga.
		
00:35:04 --> 00:35:04
			Amazing, right?
		
00:35:05 --> 00:35:05
			But it's human.
		
00:35:06 --> 00:35:09
			I'll pick on myself next, which shows that
		
00:35:09 --> 00:35:09
			it passed down.
		
00:35:09 --> 00:35:12
			Anyway, so when I made a mistake, like
		
00:35:12 --> 00:35:14
			it was definitely felt, right?
		
00:35:15 --> 00:35:16
			It was definitely felt.
		
00:35:18 --> 00:35:19
			And then now if your kids make a
		
00:35:19 --> 00:35:21
			mistake or if somebody makes a mistake, like
		
00:35:21 --> 00:35:22
			how do you make them feel?
		
00:35:22 --> 00:35:24
			The worst level of it is you let
		
00:35:24 --> 00:35:25
			them feel it.
		
00:35:25 --> 00:35:26
			You let them simmer in it.
		
00:35:26 --> 00:35:27
			You let them sit in their mistake like
		
00:35:27 --> 00:35:28
			wallowing in that.
		
00:35:29 --> 00:35:31
			But then for those of us who are
		
00:35:31 --> 00:35:33
			a little bit more sophisticated, we have like
		
00:35:33 --> 00:35:33
			the backhand.
		
00:35:34 --> 00:35:35
			It's okay, I guess.
		
00:35:37 --> 00:35:38
			It's tough, man.
		
00:35:38 --> 00:35:39
			May Allah help us.
		
00:35:40 --> 00:35:41
			Like we still want them to feel pain.
		
00:35:42 --> 00:35:43
			But we don't want to be the one
		
00:35:43 --> 00:35:44
			that's giving the pain.
		
00:35:44 --> 00:35:45
			We're like, That's fine.
		
00:35:46 --> 00:35:46
			No, that's okay.
		
00:35:46 --> 00:35:48
			I was going to eat that, but it's
		
00:35:48 --> 00:35:48
			fine.
		
00:35:48 --> 00:35:48
			It's fine.
		
00:35:49 --> 00:35:50
			Now I was really hungry.
		
00:35:50 --> 00:35:50
			It's okay.
		
00:35:51 --> 00:35:53
			You know, Taco Bell is open still.
		
00:35:54 --> 00:35:55
			Just laying it on, laying it on.
		
00:35:55 --> 00:35:57
			We don't allow for mistakes to happen.
		
00:35:59 --> 00:36:01
			And so transfer all of that experience now
		
00:36:01 --> 00:36:02
			over to Allah.
		
00:36:03 --> 00:36:05
			So then when a person thinks about making
		
00:36:05 --> 00:36:08
			a mistake or when they think about what
		
00:36:08 --> 00:36:10
			happens if I make a mistake, it's like
		
00:36:10 --> 00:36:12
			one mistake and I'm done.
		
00:36:13 --> 00:36:16
			And no one gives up faster on themselves
		
00:36:16 --> 00:36:17
			than a person who thinks that they're done.
		
00:36:18 --> 00:36:19
			Like nobody comes back from that.
		
00:36:20 --> 00:36:22
			This is why the Prophet ﷺ, he was
		
00:36:22 --> 00:36:24
			constantly that ray of hope for people.
		
00:36:24 --> 00:36:27
			You know, there was a companion, there was
		
00:36:27 --> 00:36:30
			a person, sorry, that was the bounty hunters
		
00:36:30 --> 00:36:31
			that were chasing the Prophet ﷺ.
		
00:36:34 --> 00:36:35
			And there were two of them.
		
00:36:36 --> 00:36:38
			And the Prophet ﷺ, when he engaged with
		
00:36:38 --> 00:36:40
			them, they were trying to capture him and
		
00:36:40 --> 00:36:41
			kill him.
		
00:36:41 --> 00:36:43
			When I say bounty hunters, it sounds fancy.
		
00:36:43 --> 00:36:44
			They were trying to kill him.
		
00:36:46 --> 00:36:47
			And he turns around, he says, من أنتما?
		
00:36:48 --> 00:36:48
			Who are you?
		
00:36:49 --> 00:36:51
			And like kind of shakes him a little
		
00:36:51 --> 00:36:51
			bit.
		
00:36:51 --> 00:36:54
			Because they're expecting, you know, when you get
		
00:36:54 --> 00:36:59
			jumped, like the response that the person that's
		
00:36:59 --> 00:37:01
			attacking you is not expecting is for like
		
00:37:01 --> 00:37:02
			strength.
		
00:37:02 --> 00:37:04
			They're expecting like, please don't.
		
00:37:04 --> 00:37:06
			So the Prophet ﷺ, he turns around,