AbdelRahman Murphy – Heartwork Guided Steps To The Path Of Allah #19
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AI: Transcript ©
Okay.
As-salamu alaykum.
As-salamu alaykum.
Bismillah.
Bismillah wa alhamdulillah wa salatu wassalamu ala rasulillahi
wa ala alihi wa ashabihi ajma'in.
Welcome home, everybody.
It's good to see you.
Alhamdulillah.
You know, I wanted to, inshallah, get started
as soon as I could, but I think
it's just important that we take a second
to talk a little bit about, subhanallah, some
of the images that are coming out of
Gaza right now, and especially last night.
You know, I know that for those of
you who have seen it, you know, for
those who haven't, you know, you'll probably end
up seeing it on social media, but the
attacks on the Muslims are, you know, who
could have thought they're intensifying, they're growing, they're
increasing.
But it's interesting, because last Friday, we had
one of our guests here at Juma'ah
was a young boy named Adam.
He came to Dallas through, I believe the
organization's called Heal Palestine, so he came to
Dallas through Heal Palestine to get some treatment,
so he lost one of his limbs, his
leg, and he came with his mother, Umm
Said, and we sat with them, and you
know, it's funny, man, his kids are subhanallah,
so he doesn't speak any English, obviously, and
a lot of the kids here, you know,
they weren't able to converse with him.
So I was pushing him in his wheelchair,
and I was like, man, what can we
do, and then I realized we have PS5s.
So I was like, do you want to
play FIFA, and he was like, oh, no,
I'm not.
So I put him on FIFA, and we
put him on Teams, and you know, it
was really intense, like subhanallah for that moment,
like he just became like a kid, and
they were, he was yelling at his teammate
in Arabic, and his teammate's like, basic kid,
he's like, I don't know what he's saying,
and I was like, he's telling you to
pass, because you're not passing, and but then
after that whole, you know, experience, they played
here for a bit, and then went back
to the Mosalla, where his mother was, and
we sat, Laith and myself and some others
were sitting, and she was just telling us
the story of, you know, she was telling
us the story of kind of what happened,
and how from, from her time till now,
like what, how she got here, basically, and
subhanallah, there's a lot to say, there's too
much to really retell, but effectively, what she
was saying was that, you know, whatever you're
seeing on the pictures and images, she was
saying it's, it's much, much worse than you
can imagine, and I think we all, you
know, there's no issue believing that, of course,
but it's much, much more, more difficult than
we can imagine, but then at the same
time, what I noticed, subhanallah, was that she
kept, and this is something that we've come
to see and expect now, but she just
kept referring to how blessed she was, and
how lucky she was, and even in those
moments that she was recounting the difficulty, she
just kept talking about, we have so much
to be thankful for, and, you know, her
son was kind of, you know, maybe frustrated
or bothered, because he saw some kids running
around, and obviously, as a nine-year-old
boy, like, you're going to be like, you
know, I remember when I used to be
able to run around, you know, just a
few months ago, and so he was a
little bit down, and then she just kind
of looked at him, and she was like,
don't be sad, you know, you have so
much, and she started, like, you know, reminding
him of the blessings that he had, and
meanwhile, like, this is somebody who has every
right to be upset, and so, I just,
I took that moment, subhanallah, as a lesson,
and really as a darus, and as a
class for me, and I sat there in
front of her, and listened to how she
was able to interpret the world, and process
the world, and no matter how difficult, and
how challenging it was, subhanallah, and her story
was very, very difficult to listen to, it
must have been even more difficult to live,
but she still was able to show that
resilience, and she kept saying things like, when
we go back, when we go back, when
we go back, I was talking to somebody
earlier today, and, you know, he said, you
know, he's getting this dark thought in his
head, of like, every time a new attack
happens, like, the thought comes to his head,
like, when are we just going to concede,
and save the lives of these people, and
evacuate, and concede, because to see images of
people in fire, being incinerated, you know, the
natural, visceral response is like, we just need
to get everyone out of the danger, right,
and so he was saying, like, when, and
another person in the chat, another person in
the chat that we were in says, you
know, we don't, we don't make that call
when to give up, right, we follow the
lead of the Palestinians who are there, the
people who are actually on the ground, and
if they stay resilient, then we follow their
lead, and so I wanted to share this
as sort of a reminder to everybody, that
as much fatigue, and as much heartbreak as
you're experiencing, you need to take your lead
from the people that are, are the heroes
on the ground right now, and you need
to reinforce your faith using the faith that
they are displaying, and that they're showing, and
then remember, what my teachers told us, and
you know, subhanAllah, is that when shahada is
happening, when the, when the martyr, the hadith
says, that when the martyr is transitioning from
this life to the next, it doesn't matter
how painful the outside image looks, but the
actual experience of pain that that martyr is
going through, the hadith says, is equivalent to
the bite of a mosquito, so the pain
level that a person who is experiencing martyrdom,
that is going through shahada, they're not experiencing
the pain that we are seeing, they're experiencing,
based on the hadith, the pain that a
person would feel, the nuisance of the bite
of a small bug, and even from a
physiological standpoint, right, when people are experiencing different
things, the reality is Allah ta'ala is
the one who controls the intensity, Allah ta
'ala is the one who controls the discomfort
and the comfort, and we pray that Allah
ta'ala, that just like he sent a
coolness upon the fire of Ibrahim, that those
who passed last night, they experienced nothing but
the coolness of jannah, and that in that
moment, we saw fire, but they saw the
garden, we ask Allah ta'ala to make
that the case, and we ask Allah to
make it even better than we can imagine,
and we ask Allah to also not to
hold us accountable for our weakness and our
ineptitude in being able to solve this problem,
but we ask Allah to make us those
that can contribute towards a solution and towards
relief, I just feel remiss if we don't
start by talking about what is pertinent and
on everyone's minds and hearts, subhanallah, but continuing,
and this is also a part of that
effort, is that when we do islah of
our heart, we are increasing the collective power
of our du'as, our prayers are burdened
by our sins, and our inability to show
that discipline and that spiritual strength can limit
the strength of the du'as that we
utter, and so some people might say why
are we gathering here every Monday night, learning
and reflecting and reading, well the reality is
that as you increase in faith, you're increasing
in your potency, your du'as become more
focused and strong, and an ummah that has
stronger du'as is an ummah that's able
to beseech Allah's mercy in a more real
way, and so we're going to continue inshallah
with reading and doing a little bit of
self-reflection, we talked about last week, as
we spoke about, you know as we open
tonight with the idea of those who are
virtuous and those who are full of vice,
that why would Allah give prosperity, and why
would Allah give what we view as blessing
and privilege to those people that behave in
a way that is exactly counter to what
He subhanahu wa ta'ala wants, how is
it possible that we could see somebody that
is every step, every word, every action, is
against what Islam asks and demands, and yet
Allah ta'ala gives these people the riches
of the world, and it becomes a moment
that we feel in our minds and our
hearts, a moment of like a major fork
in the road, a decision that has to
be made, and that decision is, is this
dunya, and is the material world that we
live in, really the mark of Allah's love
or not, and when you look at it,
and again we say this over and over
again, you see that there are those who
are wealthy, those who are powerful, those who
have status, but they rebel against Allah, and
you see for example the prophets of Allah
who don't have any of the above, in
fact they are from the most meek and
humble of resources, but we know for a
fact that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala loves
them, so we know, we know from a
theoretical standpoint, if I were to ask everybody
in this room, does wealth equal the love
of God, then everybody would insha Allah be
able to say, no, that's not necessarily the
case, but as much as we can say
things rhetorically, the challenge is whether or not
we actually believe that, and the challenge is
whether or not our behavior reflects that belief
or not, alright, and so it's funny, someone
earlier today we were texting, and they said
that comfort can be a test from Allah,
like comfort can be a test from Allah,
and I responded, and I said subhanallah, the
companions of the prophet actually saw comfort as
a greater test, when they received things, when
they received blessings, they became more nervous, because
now they have no excuse in their struggle,
you know a person that doesn't have a
car, or a person who doesn't have health,
or a person that is struggling, they might
have an excuse, you know, why didn't you
go to Jummah, well I couldn't make it,
I wasn't feeling well, I had a migraine,
my car's not working, etc., that person has
tons of excuses, but the one whose life
is smooth and easy, and who has provision
and privilege, now all of those things become
indictment against that person, may Allah give us
the ability to live up to what we
have, and never ever may Allah allow those
privileges and those blessings that we have to
be an allegation against us, alright, so he
finishes by saying that, and then he, subhanallah,
he says this beautiful line that we said,
which is that Allah gives the world to
anybody because it doesn't matter to him, and
Allah gives faith only to those that he
loves, because that's actually what matters to him,
is the faith of a person, okay, now
there's an effect that occurs, so all of
the spiritual things that we do, they actually
have effects to them, you know the scholars
use different words for these, one of the
most famous ones that you'll read is like,
there are fruits, the growth of a fruit,
right, you'll have the fruits of your effort,
of your labor, and this is one of
the blessings of Allah, when you do something
that Allah commands, it's not simply that you're
fulfilling a command, but Allah's generosity, Allah's mercy
is that he attaches with the fulfillment some
kind of blessing, so for example, anyone here
ever give charity before?
Okay, let's try that one more time, bismillah,
has anyone here ever given charity before?
Okay, yes, alright, how did you feel after
giving charity?
Great, good, okay, so we went from good,
great to good, okay, alright, now it's like,
okay, alright, so generally speaking, you give charity,
and when, especially when it's something that you
believe in, something that's, I mean, you feel
the impact of that, and you're told, and
you see maybe, like, if you can actually
give sadaqah in a way where you can
see the impact, and that's the purpose of
charity by the way, is to actually alleviate,
you know, the difficulty of somebody, then subhanallah,
that moment, you did the good deed, but
what do you also get with the good
deed?
You get this feeling, you get this emotion,
this experience of what it felt like to
do the right thing in the moment that
demanded it, alright?
Have you guys ever been patient in a
moment where everybody else was struggling to be
patient, and you were the one that was
able to contain yourself?
Have you ever, after a long time of
struggling to control your tongue and your words,
when you were angry, you controlled your tongue?
Have you ever forced yourself to not think
the negative thoughts about people that you normally
thought, but because you've been working on it,
you decided to give up all the suspicions
and work on being a positive person?
That one's tough.
But, right, have you ever gotten yourself up
to pray after working on yourself to get
your point to a point where you can
pray?
All of these things, they are the good
deeds that Allah has commanded, but they all
come with the beautiful attachments of the feeling.
And this is what subhanallah, Imam al-Hasibi
is saying.
He says here that these effects are meant
to be, number one, proof of your acceptance
of your deed, okay?
Proof of the acceptance of your deed, meaning
that if you do something, there's always a
maybe.
There's always a possibility.
This is why I love it when the,
you know, the Desi uncles, may Allah bless
them, and their Toyota Camrys, they say, what?
They say, let's offer prayer.
I love that word, because the idea is
it's not guaranteed that it's accepted.
If we go line up for prayer, and
you think of it as what we're going
to offer Maghrib, we're offering Maghrib.
Offer doesn't mean that it's guaranteed.
It means that it's possible.
And when you step up to a moment,
and you realize that you're not imposing, but
you're offering something, your mind and your heart
become much more focused.
And you become much more aware of the
opportunity now that's in front of you.
And so, when you do these deeds, when
you do these actions, you start to realize
now, okay, there's a 50-50 chance, right?
There's an opportunity.
The Prophet alayhi salatu wasalam one time walked
into the Masjid, Masjid Nabawi, saw a Sahabi
who was praying fast.
He told him what?
Go back and pray, you haven't prayed.
Go back and pray, you haven't prayed.
Why?
Because the person was praying in a way
where it was more like I'm just checking
a box off of this, rather than I'm
actually trying to feel the effect of this
Salah.
So, many people give up praying, but it's
because they haven't given prayer a fair shot.
They say this prayer doesn't feel like anything.
And the response that prayer might say back
to that person is, you didn't actually invest
in the time.
You didn't actually give it a chance to
feel what prayer has to feel.
So, he says here that this mindset of
working on not becoming a person that's dunya
focused, right?
And think about the little intricacies of how
this affects us.
Think about like the brand names.
Think about like the money.
You know, these TV shows that celebrate people's
like homes.
You know, back when I was young, it
was MTV Cribs, but now they have, it's
all over YouTube.
Let's go see LeBron's house.
Let's go see so-and-so's house.
Why isn't there a YouTube channel just showing
like very mediocre, average, like living arrangements?
Let's go look at Abdur Rahman's one bedroom.
Like, you know, like in Farmer's Branch.
Like why?
Because that's not something that the nafs enjoys,
right?
This can almost be an amazing parody channel,
by the way.
If one of you does that and takes
off, just remember me, okay?
Inshallah, when you get big.
The idea is that the nafs doesn't enjoy
that.
So, there is something innately inside of us
that struggles with the default disposition of loving
the shiny things.
And this is why the Prophet, peace be
upon him, when he told Hakeem bin Hizam,
may Allah be pleased with him, he says
that this money is green and sweet.
There's something very enticing about it.
You know, if you're in the desert and
you see something green, it's exciting.
You know, Mecca, there was some rain and
it was all green and they posted pictures
on the internet, right?
And they were like, look how green Mecca
is right now.
So, green in the desert equals like, wow.
So, he said, this money that I'm giving
you is green and it's sweet.
And he says, but whoever takes it, whomever
takes this money and they are satisfied with
it, he says, Allah will put barakah in
it.
So, whatever money you get, if you're satisfied
with it, Allah will put blessing in it.
Meaning, what does barakah mean?
A little bit goes a long way.
A little bit can do a lot more
than you imagine.
And then he says, whoever takes it and
their heart, their soul, their nafs is not
happy with it, wants more and more, he
says, he says, this person will never be
satisfied because Allah will never put barakah in
it and the person will live their life
day in, day out, Monday through Friday and
the weekends.
They will be like a person that eats
food and never gets full.
They're always hungry.
And he says, SubhanAllah, that this person, Hakim
al-Hizam, when he heard this, he used
to be, the story behind why he asked
the Prophet, peace be upon him, was because
he said, I loved money.
He was honest.
Many of us were not honest.
We're like, no, I'm good.
Right?
But then low-key, you're like texting, hey,
can I get that reference?
Can I get that, I want to raise,
can I get a promotion?
We love it.
It's something that we all struggle with.
Allah says, you love money.
So, Hakim, in his love for wealth, used
to go to the Prophet, peace be upon
him, and just ask for, what do they
call it?
Allowance.
He used to go, Ya Rasulullah, he says,
I asked him over and over and over
again.
Hakim was actually Khadijah's cousin.
So now imagine the Prophet, peace be upon
him, he's my in-laws, I gotta like,
you know, can't say no to my cousin
-in-law.
And so, SubhanAllah, he kept giving him over
and over and over again and then Hakim
has this conversation where the Prophet lays it
on him, and what does Hakim say after
this?
This is many years later.
He says, Wallahi, after that conversation, I never
ever asked a single person for a dime
after that.
I realized that what Allah has given me
is more than enough.
Is more than enough.
And so Imam Muhasibi, he says, and he
quotes this Hadith, where the Prophet, peace be
upon him, he says, whoever makes this world
their greatest concern, I want you to think
about what that means.
Let's do this practically.
When you wake up, what do you think
about?
As you walk throughout your day, what do
you think about?
Sleep.
Yeah, that's true.
Right?
What do you think about as you go
throughout your day?
What do you think about?
What are you conditioned to give your heart
to?
What do you dream about?
What do you fantasize?
SubhanAllah, we're scrolling and we see clothing and
items and vacations and food and everything.
I was at the gym and I'm on
the treadmill, right?
Which is like boot camp for unhealthy people.
We're just sitting there, all look sad.
And you know what they have on the
TV?
If this is not the dunya, then I
don't know what is.
We're in a gymnasium, right?
We're in a gym in an athletic facility
where we are paying money to exercise in
air conditioning.
And we are walking on a machine that
emulates the world, like you could just do
it on a sidewalk, okay?
And we are watching a TV that is
hung in front of us to distract us
from this torture.
And what is on the TV?
Food channel.
And what are they doing?
Eating chicken tenders and french fries.
And all of us on there are thinking,
what's our post move after the gym?
Chicken tenders have some protein, right?
Like you're imagining this.
And wallahi, I think to myself, I'm not
joking.
I'm sitting there and I'm like, what kind
of sick game is this?
Like surely someone did this intentionally.
And this is exactly what the dunya is.
The dunya is nothing but lived contradictions.
For the person that can't see beyond the
illusion, they don't think it's a contradiction.
But for those people that look around, they're
like, am I crazy here?
Is this the only, am I the only
person that's noticing how contradictory this is?
Think about this.
You know, this happened actually when I was
younger.
We used to go and we used to
collect leftover food from local bakeries.
Panera bread was one of them.
And we used to go and collect that.
And then we would take that food to
some of these distribution centers downtown that would
call those people who needed food in to
get some food.
So this is part of like our MSA
in college.
We would go, we'd take like leftover bagels,
whatever we could, whatever didn't go bad.
And then subhanallah, this was the franchise owner.
They allowed us to do it.
And it was kind of on the low.
They were like, come to the back door,
make sure you come after 11, you know,
text me on your way, et cetera.
And they used to give, I'm not joking,
like thousands of dollars worth of food.
Now listen, that they would otherwise have to
throw away.
The district manager found out after a few
months and the person got in trouble, they
got fined or something.
And then they had to throw these things
away.
And we used to go and we used
to actually subhanallah stand there and watch them
take all this food and just good, clean,
pure food and just throw it in garbage
cans.
And just a block away is someone with
a sign that says, please, I'm hungry.
This world is maddening.
If you don't see it, it can drive
you insane.
The contradictions that you see.
I always tell people that say, why would
God let this happen?
And I say, subhanallah, why did what Allah
is asking us?
Why are you letting this happen?
Why are you, there's not enough food for
everybody in the world.
You know, when I used to teach aqidah,
I used to ask this question.
People say, why would God allow, why would
God allow hunger?
I say, there's not enough food for everybody.
Is there enough food?
Yes or no?
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
You all said that with the conviction of
people that have bought groceries, put it in
your fridge until it went bad and throw
it away.
That's the, that's the name.
There's memes about this now.
I went grocery shopping.
Can't wait to throw this away in six
days.
That's how privileged and spoiled we've become.
We live in a world where we see
the problem.
We have a solution, but we don't bring
the solution to the problem, subhanallah.
For what reason?
Allah knows best.
And so listen to this hadith because you're
going to, you're going to hear the hadith
and say, how is that possible?
Listen, he says, whoever makes the world their
greatest concern, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala will
divide your attention between all of your concerns
and will leave nothing left for your heart
except for the feeling of being impoverished.
So whoever, all they think about is not
the purpose of their life, not what they
should be doing or could be doing with
their time that's better.
None of those things.
Whoever, all they think about is what can
I buy?
What can I get that's new?
What can I upgrade?
What can I do this?
What can I do that?
Right?
Like it's almost a joke now.
The new iPhone, it's actually a joke.
I apologize if you bought it.
I'm not offending you, right?
But you should feel very offended.
But there's no difference between last year's and
this year.
It's like they sit in a room and
they're like, what can we do that these
fools will, subhanAllah, right?
What can we do?
And people and society and the world stops
and watches as nothing is changed and they
buy the new one.
Why?
Because why?
Because the feeling we get makes us feel,
if we don't have it, we feel impoverished.
If I don't have this brand, I feel
impoverished.
If I don't have this, I feel impoverished.
So he says, sallallahu alayhi wasallam, whoever thinks
only about the dunya, Allah will give you
the dunya.
He'll give it to you.
He'll divide it up, put it right in
front of you, but you know what else
he'll give you?
He'll give you the pain of anxiety of
feeling poor all the time.
You'll never feel satisfied.
Go ahead.
That's what the dunya comes with.
It's a poison pill.
That's what the Prophet, peace be upon him,
said.
This money is green and sweet.
When you see it, you're going to feel
good.
But you know what comes with that money,
if that's all you care about, is the
sickness of love of this world.
But now listen to the second half.
He says, as for the one who makes
the hereafter, the akhirah, their greatest concern, he
says, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala will give
this person something in their heart that is
unreplaceable, that you can't replicate.
What is that experience?
Allah will give this person sakinah, tranquility.
He will give this person focus.
He will give this person the ability to
navigate through any difficulty.
And he says, sallallahu alayhi wasallam, that Allah
will place wealth in the heart of this
person to such an extent that he will
feel, she will feel, that the world is
their servant.
What's the amazing thing about this hadith?
The amazing thing of this hadith is that
the net worth of these two individuals are
not discussed.
We don't know actually.
We don't know which one is rich or
poor.
We don't know which one has more money
or less money.
All we know is not the wealth, but
we know how they see the world.
It's very possible, subhanallah, that a person could
be doing very well financially, but they can
go to sleep every night with poverty in
their heart.
And it's very possible that a person could
be living modestly, moderately, even with a little
bit of struggle, but they feel an immense
sense of gratitude to Allah to where they
feel like they have too much, that they
have too much.
So listen to this.
The commentator says, the fundamental base, what makes
you successful as a person is your ability
to focus.
You guys all have cameras on your phones,
right?
You hold up your cameras and you take
a picture, and you realize that there's something
that is in focus and something that is
out of focus, right?
And how do you change that?
Anyone know?
Tap the screen.
Very good.
So when you tap the screen, you're telling
the camera, I want you to focus on
this, not that.
So you know the difference between the person
who feels rich and poor?
It's the same picture.
It's just how you focus.
It's just how you focus.
Remember growing up and your parents would talk
to you about, be thankful for what you
have.
There's people that don't have what you have.
And you would say like, I know.
And you would just be like, you in
that moment as a child, it's okay, right?
You're like this happened last week.
I'm 27.
No, that's a problem, right?
But you in that moment as a child,
the problem was you didn't have the ability
to change focus.
You were stuck on you.
You were like, this is what I want.
This is what I want.
All my friends have it.
This is what I want.
Your parents or uncle or whoever, grandparents, those
who are more wise than you, who have
more experience, they said, hey, you're not focusing
on the right part of this picture.
You're focusing too much on yourself.
You need to look and see what everyone
else, SubhanAllah, doesn't have that you have.
This is why the Prophet, peace be upon
him, there's a man who came to him
and he said, Ya Rasulullah, I have hardness
of my heart.
I feel my heart is hard.
What's the sign of a hard heart?
Ingratitude, a person is not thankful, a person
is, they ignore their responsibilities to Allah's power,
they don't pray, etc.
So he came to the Prophet, peace be
upon him, he said, I have a hard
heart, right?
You know what the Prophet, peace be upon
him, told him?
What was the prescription?
Anyone know?
That's a really good guess.
And that's, you're like basically there, but there
was a specific action he said.
He said, donate.
There's a specific action.
He said, go and pat the head of
an orphan.
He wasn't saying this like, do this and
then walk away.
Like, hey, orphan.
He was saying what?
What does that mean?
In Arabic, when you tell someone to go
and pat somebody's head, it's the same thing
as putting an arm around their shoulder.
In English, we say, go put your arm
around their shoulder.
You don't go do like, awkward first wedding
photo, like, you know.
No, when you say put arm around shoulder,
what you're saying is what?
Embrace that person.
The Prophet, peace be upon him, goes to
this man who says, my heart is hard,
and he says, do you think you have
anything to complain about when you go and
look at a young boy who has no
parents that are alive?
What complaint do you have that can match
the complaint of a child that lost his
village, his support?
When that child cries, they don't have a
parent to go to.
They don't have the consolation of a mother
or father.
Your difficulties by contrast to that child are
nothing.
So he said to him that you have
this hard heart.
Go and spend time with the ones who
are dealing with a lot more difficulty than
you.
So the Prophet, peace be upon him, here,
he says, you have to change your focus.
Gratitude is within reach for all of us
if we learn how to change our focus.
And he says, if you focus on what
you were created for, to serve Allah and
to serve others, then everything else in the
world feels like a footnote.
Everything else.
If I were to ask somebody, what did
you accomplish today?
If I went up to someone in this
room, what did you do today?
And the person was focused on the wrong
things, you might tell me everything that you've
done, and you might leave out fajr, dhuhr,
asr, maghrib, and isha.
Right?
And we're all guilty of this.
Like, what did you do today?
I'm like, well, I woke up, I made
breakfast, I went to work, I did that,
I worked out, hung out with this, did
that, called my friends, and after this, we're
gonna go here.
And, you know, I sound like an Egyptian
mom, my Egyptian mom specifically, but she would
say to me, when she said, like, what
are you doing today?
What are your plans today?
And I would ignore the prayer.
I wouldn't mention it.
It was just a given, like, oh yeah,
of course, of course, mom, of course.
She would say, no.
Don't say of course.
You have to make it a point that
this is something that you are going to
actually give your time to.
So think about, when you think about your
own daily accomplishments, is the salah included in
that?
And especially, this is gonna be a little
bit awkward, but hey, that's why we're here.
If you're not able to consistently do your
five prayers every day, then making your prayers
is actually a major accomplishment.
If you don't make fajr every day, and
you wake up, dude, fajr these days, this
is as easy as it gets, y'all.
You wake up, it's like, fajr ends when?
9.40, like, get, no, I'm just joking,
not that late.
You know, this is as good as it
gets.
You know, November 3rd, the clock's going back,
so we're gonna offer janaz on November 2nd
for easy fajrs.
But if you struggle with fajr every day,
and you wake up and pray fajr, that
is a major accomplishment.
You know why you feel accomplished?
Because you change your focus.
You realize that I'm not getting up for
work, I'm getting up for fajr, and I
just happen to go to work.
Right?
That's what makes you different.
Everyone else in the world is the same.
What makes you different is that your focus
is different.
So he says, the person that realizes that
their focus should be on serving Allah and
serving others, everything else becomes a footnote.
Everything else.
He says, once you accept that you were
not created just to make money, to drive
a certain car, to marry a particular way,
he says that you will find this focus
that you're looking for.
The question is how do I get it?
You have to eliminate all distractions.
You have to push everything else aside.
If you keep letting your heart attach itself
to things that are temporary, and that will
eventually fall away, you will never be able
to attach your heart to that which is
permanent.
Why does Allah Ta'ala, in the back,
in the back right, we're going to get
inshallah the pieces that explain each calligraphy.
At the end of Surah Al-A'la,
Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala, He says, بَلْ
تُؤْفِرُونِ الْحَيَاةَ الدُّنْيَةِ وَالْآخِرَةُ خَيْرٌ وَأَبِقَىٰ Allah,
commenting on all of us, says you prefer
this life.
This is your challenge.
Your challenge is that you prefer this life.
You know the first day of work, the
person that's training you or that's onboarding you
tells you this, like hey, one of the
challenges here is going to be this.
Allah is telling you one of your challenges
here is going to be this.
You're going to constantly have to battle your
preferences.
And then Allah says, وَالْآخِرَةُ خَيْرٌ وَأَبِقَىٰ And
it's almost humorous because Allah says the akhirah,
the thing that you're choosing to demote in
your rankings, the akhirah, He says it's better
than this life and it's permanent, it's everlasting.
If you were to go to somebody and
say, why would you give everything you have,
every resource, all of your money to renovate
a hotel room when your home is over
there?
My Shaykh used to use this example.
He says, would you ever buy new furniture,
a new television, new carpet, paint a hotel
room that you're spending a weekend?
And we said, no Shaykh.
He said, why not?
And we used to say because we're not
staying there.
He said, then why do you treat the
dunya this way?
Why?
He says, you need to look at the
dunya like a hotel room.
You're only here for a short while.
If something's not working, if the TV is
not perfect, if the bathroom door has a
weird creak to it, right?
If the balcony doesn't open all the way,
you can complain to management if you want,
Karen, you can, right?
Or you can just, I'm sorry if your
name is actually Karen.
Welcome to Roots.
We're really happy to have you, right?
Okay.
But you can, but the tranquil soul, the
tranquil heart, what do they say?
The person in the room, we paid for
this, leave them a one star, dah, dah,
dah, dah.
The tranquil soul says what?
We're only here for a day.
Let's just, let's go somewhere.
Let's change our focus.
Don't focus on that, right?
But if the same thing is happening in
your home, where you are going to be,
where you know is your permanent abode, that's
where your energy is due.
The akhira is our home.
The dunya is a temporary place.
This is our hotel.
I know where we think it's going to
be 70, 80 years, whatever.
But whenever you measure anything against infinity, it's
zero.
The akhira is our home.
Allah says, so he says, if you do
not accept that you were created to worship,
then the default is you will chase all
these other distractions, like a car chasing, a
dog chasing a car down the road.
And you'll realize at the end of every
chase that you never got any real happiness.
That's why fasting is so amazing.
Because fasting is literally the deprivation of everything
you think makes you happy.
And subhanallah, in one month you learn that
even the things that you think really make
you happy are not the things that bring
you true joy and happiness.
You know, as you're sitting there, one thing
I think that's really profound is in Ramadan,
there's things that we give up because we
have to give them up, like food and
drink and all that.
But then there's other things that we give
up that's more voluntary.
Like people give up, for example, like, you
know, watching TV, listening to music, if that's
when they struggle with, etc.
All these things, right?
And in the last 10 nights, we give
up even more.
You know, people give up like, this is
not like a offensive thing, but I'm just
saying, I think it's interesting because I sit
here, so I'm able to see everybody, right?
People give up obsessing over what they're wearing.
People give up a lot of like, makeup.
I'm just calling it like I see it.
Really, people give up the most interesting things.
The last 10 nights are like the purest
reflection in the mirror of who you really
want to be.
Every other day of the year, we turn
ourselves into like the best presentation of who
we think we are, but in the last
10 nights, it's the closest that your physical
being is to your soul.
And in those nights, you feel like your
soul is enough, right?
Like this is the most beautiful part of
me.
I'm here, the 27th night, in the masjid,
making dua.
This is the most beautiful I will ever
be.
I don't need anything else to make me
more beautiful than this.
And that's what he's saying here.
The more you're convinced that your purpose is
Allah, the less you feel like you have
to.
I'm not saying don't dress nice.
I'm not saying, what I'm saying is be
confident more in your soul than you are
in your body.
Because your body eventually goes away, your soul
does not.
May Allah Ta'ala give us Tawfiq.
And that's what he says.
We'll finish here.
You guys have Q&A inshallah.
If you want to send questions, you can
go to slido.com, hard work inshallah.
And then we have prayer in about 10
minutes.
He says, this is what the hadith means
when he says that the world will be
subservient to you.
It's not that you own the world.
It's not that you will get to own
the world.
But he says, when you don't hold the
world in your heart, then you hold it
in your hand.
These things don't implant themselves into your consciousness.
You're able to control exactly how much you
need when you need it.
It's like being able to see something and
to turn it away.
Or it's like being able to see something
take a little bit.
Or it's like seeing something and recognizing this
is actually in fact what you need.
May Allah Ta'ala give us the perspective
that the author has been talking about.
May Allah Ta'ala give us the ability
to not fall in love with the dunya
in a way that discards the akhirah.
May Allah give us the ability to focus
and gain the skill of being able to
focus on the right things.
And may Allah Ta'ala make us truly
content with what we have.
And that we're not people that are constantly
asking for more.
But that we seek more barakah in what
we already have.
Let's go ahead inshallah and go to the
Q&A.
If you go to slido.com.
It's not working?
Okay, let me see.
Let me reset it.
Okay, try now.
The code is heartwork.
I'm trying to see who can send the
first marriage question.
Okay, okay.
Number one.
Prayer is in about 12 minutes.
So we'll talk for about 8 minutes and
then we'll break inshallah.
Are dating apps halal?
I need you to stand up and quietly
leave.
No, I'm joking.
You know I actually don't know the answer
because I've never been on a dating app.
So you got to ask someone who's been
on one.
I got married a long time ago before
dating apps were a thing.
So Allah knows best.
My heart feels hard.
Okay, ready?
My heart feels hard as well.
Especially in the context of Raza.
It breaks my heart but I don't cry
easily.
Seeing gruesome images, I just carry on my
day.
I'm not sure how to bring back to
life.
Okay, can I share something with you as
a chronic crier?
Crying is not the only, you know, there's
a crying of the eye and there's a
crying of the heart.
And there are people who can cry with
their eyes and not actually be sad.
Like there's actors, okay?
And likewise, there are people who are, who
can weep internally but their eyes are not,
they don't express and articulate that, right?
And sometimes you're really just honestly you're too
devastated to even cry.
And so I don't want anyone in the
room to feel like because I don't shed
tears, I must not be like a caring
emotional person.
No, that's not true.
That's not true.
When the scholars talk about the eyes crying,
you know, there are some scholars that further
elaborate and say that it's not a requirement
of emotion for a person to shed tears.
What you need to, so then how do
you know that you're feeling something is when
your heart is experiencing the emotion, when you
are experiencing it.
Ask yourself some basic questions, right?
When I am looking at something, when I'm
witnessing this thing, how do I feel?
There was a person that said, you know,
that when I, when I see certain things
from Gaza, I don't have an appetite for
food.
I go to bed without eating.
And I said, that's, that's an expression of
grief.
That's how your body is expressing the sadness.
Your stomach that normally wants food after seeing
this doesn't want food, right?
So everybody has their different.
Some people say I need to be alone.
I don't like talking.
My social battery is depleted instantly.
All of these are their own form of
crying.
So whatever you feel, don't discount that this
is an expression of sympathy and of connectedness
where you should be worried.
Okay.
So as long as you're feeling something, don't
be worried where you should be worried is
if you don't feel anything, you don't feel
anything.
You're just like, okay, that's a concern.
So empathy has different expressions.
Don't, don't get so caught up in trying
to find the expression you think you need
to have.
Allow yourself to feel the expression that is
there.
But if you don't feel any expression, then
there might be some things to go with
that.
Inshallah.
The top question, I'm just going to answer
it because it's been uploaded 19 times.
Why is there no gender segregation at roots?
There is, mashallah.
I don't see any men over here and
I don't see any women over here.
And then we have a family section in
the middle for those that have come together.
And so if you have any good questions,
then come see me personally, inshallah.
Otherwise, thank you for coming.
Thank you for playing.
How do you know you're ready for marriage?
Next question.
There's a, there's a Sharia answer to this.
And then there's like an emotional intelligence answer
to this, like shut on, like the Sharia
requires that a person have, you know, stability
in terms of their, their body, their mind,
their finances, of course, faith.
That's, that's a prerequisite, of course.
And if a person is stable in their,
in their personal, you know, themself, their being,
their mind, their aql, and their, their finances,
then that is a prerequisite that they fulfilled.
And that is a sign of readiness for
marriage.
But of course, it goes way beyond that.
It goes way, way beyond that.
There are, you know, great books that a
person can read.
There are sessions that a person can take
where they can discover, you know, if they're
emotionally equipped, because when you marry somebody, it's
marriage is wonderful.
It's incredible.
But it is, in fact, work, like any
relationship, you know, you can get hired at
the best job that you ever wanted to
work at in your entire life.
And there are still requirements, right?
There are still things you have to do.
And so all of these, all of these
sort of like romanticized notions about marriage, inshallah,
they're all true.
But they all come with a context of
a person being able to facilitate a good
relationship, inshallah.
So those require some readiness.
And that requires some focus, bismillah.
Do we wear hijab in Jannah?
I don't know.
I haven't been yet.
So yeah, me too.
I can't believe someone asked that actually.
I can't believe someone asked that.
I don't know.
I don't.
Yeah, I don't really know.
That's a great question.
All right.
So this question has popped up a few
weeks in a row.
So I'm going to answer but I'm going
to answer it my way.
So what is the bare minimum of fard
in hijab?
Do we have to cover our necks, our
pants allowed, etc?
And the question was edited, which I don't
know what you added.
But always, by the way, very shady when
you edit, like texts and stuff, just just
know that we can all still see what
you said the first time.
So, so the fard for hijab, you know,
there's actually there, there is a comes down
to basically the, the, the covering of the
shape, the explicitly understood and seen shape of
a body.
Okay.
And there's different expressions of that.
And I'm going to let like people like
Shaykh, you know, Ustadh Fatima led and Ustadh
Khadija Bari and others who are actual like
female scholars that are here at Qalam.
You guys can, you know, seek this from
them.
Ustadh Fatima has a halaqa every Sunday.
You guys are more than welcome to come
inshallah and ask her.
For that, but what I will say is
that so the fiqh side of it, I'll
let them handle.
But what I will say from the spiritual
side of this is that everybody in their
journey in Islam is required to do their
best.
Okay.
And so when we look at an ideal,
and someone is not yet at an ideal,
it's very dangerous to make somebody feel like
you're either 100 or you're zero.
And there's nothing between.
There are many stops along the way.
If we do hijab, that's one example.
If we do prayer, that's one example.
If we do fasting, you know, if somebody
is learning how to fast, if they can't
do all 30 days of fasting or 29,
do we just say like, okay, khalas, don't
do it?
No, we say what?
Do what you can.
You know, even if somebody, for example, with
chronic illness says, I'm not able to make
it fully some days, you know what the
sharia says, you have to try every day.
You can't just give yourself a blanket.
No, you have to start every day fasting,
and then break it.
If it's 9am, it's 9am.
If it's 5pm, it's 5pm.
But you have to start every day.
So the idea is that when somebody is
doing something to get closer to Allah, whether
it's an obligation, or whether it's something that's
extra, that person is doing what they can
and what is the best, even if they're
not fulfilling what is obligated, their effort is
still considered by Allah.
Okay, so it might be wearing something a
little bit more modest, even if somebody doesn't
cover their hair.
And that's a step on the journey, right?
It might be a person wearing a hijab,
like a headscarf, even if they're not wearing
abaya.
And that's a step on the journey.
Okay?
And the ideal, which I'll let Ustada Fatima
and other female scholars handle, that is there.
And we don't remove that.
But we also don't say that all of
your effort is worthless until you get to
100.
Okay, it's the same with any other question
that we have.
Allah does not, you know, destroy or waste
anyone's good deeds, right?
May Allah give us tawfiq, inshallah.
Okay, last one, we'll break for prayer, inshallah.
Oh, God, those are just a lot.
How can I gain more love for the
Quran?
There's one thing that I have learned in
this question that has worked every time for
me and other people that have asked.
And that is, you have to listen to
it, you have to engage with it.
There is no way that you can love
something more unless you engage with it more
frequently.
Find a reciter that you enjoy, find someone
that their voice is beautiful to you, and
listen to the Quran.
Let that be the entry to your journey.
And then use it to follow along as
you read.
And then use it to develop a relationship
and maybe memorize what you can and make
that your path to the Quran.
And then eventually you'll get to a point
where you want to learn what you're actually
hearing and the language and you want to
understand the stories behind it.
These are all steps along the way.
But it all begins with the first one,
which is, it is so simple to hit
the play button on Spotify.
It is so easy to hit the play
button with a reciter that's voice is beautiful.
And it's so, it's so just absolutely simple
for a person to listen to the recitation
of the Quran and let that wash over
their heart.
And then Allah Ta'ala will insha'Allah
expand those doors.
Okay, alrighty.
We're gonna go ahead and break now.
Jazakumullahu khairan everybody.
BarakAllahu feekum.
Insha'Allah if you sat on the chairs,
could you help us out by stacking them
on the dollies?
If you sat on the back jacks, could
you help us out by lining them up
front?
Insha'Allah.
Jazakumullahu khairan.
BarakAllahu feekum.
Assalamu alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.