AbdelRahman Murphy – Heartwork Guided Steps To The Path Of Allah #14

AbdelRahman Murphy
AI: Summary ©
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The segment discusses the importance of finding one's course of action and being true to oneself. It emphasizes the need for everyone to seek advice and be cautious. The segment also touches on the challenges of fasting, the importance of giving advice, and the importance of protecting one's pride. The segment concludes with a recommendation to a book and a Q&A session.
AI: Transcript ©
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As-salamu alaykum.

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Bismillah.

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Bismillah walhamdulillah wa salatu wa salamu ala rasulullahi

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wa ala alihi wa ashabihi ajma'in.

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Welcome home everybody.

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I have to, uh, my friend James got

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me this t-shirt.

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So now I have to wear this.

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Inshallah.

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It's officially, Denton has become a meme, officially.

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It's a place where people live and now

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it's just a joke according to the roots.

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No, astaghfirullah.

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Thank you James, appreciate it.

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Bismillah, bismillah walhamdulillah wa salatu wa salamu ala

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rasulullah.

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Okay, so tonight, so every year, typically around

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this time, because the day is getting shorter

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and Maghrib is sliding earlier, we tend to

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have, um, a couple of short sessions.

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So we're kind of in that zone right

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now.

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Uh, Maghrib prayer comes in at like 7

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.41 tonight.

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So we're gonna, we continue usually for about

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10 minutes.

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We, we, we will finish at 7.45

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and then we'll go pray, uh, at the

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Iqama which is at 7.50 inshallah, 7

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.51. So, and then next week there's another

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one and then inshallah we're gonna switch to

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after Maghrib soon.

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So it'll be like 7.20 something and

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then we'll start at 7.30, uh, till

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8.30, uh, bismillah.

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So it's, it happens every year.

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It's just one of those adjustments in time

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that we make.

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And of course prayer is more important than

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anything that I'm saying here.

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So it's not like, it's not like we're,

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we're being, uh, inconvenienced, right?

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We're, we're actually just doing what Allah Ta

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'ala, uh, expects of us.

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Okay, so bismillah.

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So to jump right in, of course the

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Slido is open if you have any questions,

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slido.com slash, uh, or slido.com and

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then the code is HEARTWORKS.

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So send all of your, uh, all of

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your marriage questions there because that's exactly what

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I want to hear every week.

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No, I'm joking.

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Um, so last week we finished up the,

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it's kind of turned into like a two

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-part series on the signs of the hypocrites

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and what are the traits of the hypocrites

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in particular, uh, and how, you know, even

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though a person might not be a hypocrite

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themselves, but carrying the traits or the symptoms

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of hypocrisy is never a good thing.

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And it's usually a sign of an indication

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of some sort of illness, spiritual ailment of

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the heart.

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And so he mentioned some of those.

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And then he talks about some of the

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cures or some of the remedies for those

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signs.

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And we talked about, you know, he mentioned

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a few of them, remembering Allah Subhanahu Wa

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Ta'ala.

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Uh, he talked about, of course, how it

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becomes easier for a person to do this

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when they are in good company, right?

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So spending time with people that inspire you,

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that you admire, that bring you closer to

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Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala.

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Um, he mentioned another, right, trait is that

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never be a person that commands something and

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then feels like it doesn't apply to you,

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right?

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So it's, this is not talking about being

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perfect, but it's saying, if you are somebody

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that is fixated on imposing or imparting something

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upon people, but you yourself have no urgency

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to fulfill the same thing, right?

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I just like telling people, I enjoy reminding,

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but I don't enjoy doing.

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Then that is a sign of hypocrisy.

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So being careful not to be a person

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that tells people but doesn't do.

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So these are all some of the cures

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that he mentioned.

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And then he says, humble yourself before the

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truth and make yourself submit to it, okay?

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And this is the great reminder that what

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you want to do, what you want to

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do may or may not align with what

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Allah wants you to do.

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And that's just a fact of life.

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Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala, He created us

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with multiple variables, multiple facets, right?

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We have our bodies, we have our souls,

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we have the ego, the thing that wants

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to, we have all of these different components

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that make up our human existence.

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And there are some times where the heart

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and the ruh, the soul, are the things

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that are pushing us and motivating us the

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most.

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And there are some times where those elements

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are muted, are silenced.

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And when we find ourselves being inspired to

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do good, right?

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To pray, and we pray easily, smoothly, right?

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Without having to do a lot of negotiation.

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There's no hostage situation.

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You want to pray, let's pray.

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Versus the times where getting up and praying

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feels like the most difficult thing.

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Or giving charity.

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There are times when you give sadaqah and

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it's so smooth.

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It's just easy, it's like water.

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But then there are times where giving even

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something so small feels like a massive deal,

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right?

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So in those moments, there's a gap.

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The gap is between submitting to Allah versus

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submitting to myself.

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The problem is, right, much like these plants

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around us, they all grow from soil, we

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also have been grown from soil.

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And the soil that we've been grown from,

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particularly here in the West, is the soil

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of secularism, which centers the self.

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You are important.

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You are special.

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You are sacred.

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And these are all what the world wants

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you to believe.

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Whereas our Islamic ideology tells us what?

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Allah is sacred.

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Allah is important.

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Allah is the sacred one that we should

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all turn to.

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And yes, Allah gave us specialness, right?

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We have our own traits of endearment from

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Allah.

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But it's only our relationship to Allah that

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either makes us more special or less special.

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إِنَّ أَكْرَمَكُمْ عِنْدَ اللَّهِ أَتْقَاكُمْ Your taqwa is

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what dictates how special you are.

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So the Islamic worldview kind of bumps up

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against the secular worldview, and that's what we

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struggle with.

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That's the challenge that we have here and

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honestly now globally.

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So he says, submit yourself to the truth

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and make yourself subservient to it.

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Constantly remember Allah and that will give you

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this nearness to Him.

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And this is where we ended last week.

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Now, one of the things about good company,

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and this is going to be one of

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those tough, tough, bitter, bitter sessions.

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Not in a bad way, but it's good.

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It's like a good workout.

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One of the things about good company is

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that we mentioned last week that there are

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some people that you can simply spend time

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with and their presence inspires you.

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You look at them and even their face,

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right?

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The way that they have their body language,

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the way they carry themselves, it's inspirational.

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There are other elements to good company too.

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And tonight we're going to talk about a

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very important one, and that is that what

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makes a good friend?

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What is the number one characteristic that makes

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a good friend?

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And I'll read here with you what he

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says.

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He says here, be sincere with Allah and

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His Messenger.

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Be sincere with Allah and His Messenger.

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What does that mean?

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It means what?

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Put them first.

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If you're sincere with the person that you

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love, they automatically are bubbled up to the

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top of the rankings in your life.

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Sincerity is what's going to dictate that.

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So if I'm sincere with Allah and His

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Messenger, naturally I'm going to elevate Allah and

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His Messenger to the top status in my

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life.

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How?

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You have to be willing to receive sincere

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advice from other believers.

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So this is the challenge.

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How many of us are really, really equipped,

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emotionally, spiritually, to receive advice from others?

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Versus how many times do we begin to

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hear something and we instantly become defensive?

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We try to justify, we try to defend,

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we try to rationalize.

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Versus saying, you know what, I might be

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able to benefit from this.

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So one of the traits of companionship that

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makes you better, that brings you closer to

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Allah, is not just being in their company,

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but when they remind you of something, when

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they tell you of something, these good friends,

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that you don't push back on that, you

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don't repel, you don't rebuff them and say,

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no, you don't really know, my situation is

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different, etc, etc.

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In fact, the true pious people do something

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very interesting.

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They actually try to find a way to

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apply incorrect advice.

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So somebody might want to give you advice,

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and you know that their advice is not

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completely right.

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But instead of being like, ah, they don't

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know what they're talking about, and ignoring it,

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the really sincere person says, you know what,

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they might not know what they're talking about,

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but they still might be on to something.

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Maybe they're not 100% right, or 90,

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or even 50% right, but they might

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be 20 or 10% right.

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And in that 20 or 10%, I could

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go from being this type of person to

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this type of person, if I just took

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this little bit.

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So let's go ahead and read from here.

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He says, be sincere with Allah and His

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Messenger.

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Give sincere advice to your friends, and receive

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sincere advice.

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Remember, and he adds this line, and this

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is really important.

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How many of you, you have a good

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habit of asking people for their feedback?

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Do you guys tend to ask people for

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advice or feedback?

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Anybody?

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Before you make a big decision?

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Or do you guys just go in like

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bungee jumping, like on your own?

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Like skydiving?

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Okay.

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So asking for advice before making a decision

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is from Allah.

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وَشَاوِرْهُمْ فِي الْأَمْرِ Allah actually tells in the

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Quran, seek shura.

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He told this to the Prophet of God.

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If Muhammad ﷺ was told to seek shura,

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then that means that all of us by

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default are also told to make shura.

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Because there's nobody on earth who didn't need

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to make shura more than him.

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He had direct revelation from Allah.

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But even despite the direct revelation, Allah is

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commanding him, make shura.

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So all of us should never feel too

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arrogant or too egotistical to say, you know

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what, I don't need this.

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Shura, which means advice or counsel, or to

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seek counsel in Arabic, seeking shura is part

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of our religion.

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It's part of how we function.

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And so he says, consult people in your

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life, but not everybody.

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And this is a big problem.

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A lot of us, we seek advice, which

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is good, but we seek it from everybody.

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And then we end up after our entire

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episode of asking for advice, we have a

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lot of conflicting advice.

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We have some people that say one thing,

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others that say the other, and many in

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between.

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And then we say, you know what, it's

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better just not to seek advice, because this

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whole exercise left me confused.

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Raise your hand if that's been you before.

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Where you try to seek advice, and you

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got so many confusing opinions, you're like, forget

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it.

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The problem is not the action.

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The problem is not the exercise.

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The problem was who did you plug into

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the equation.

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His advice, his imperative, Muhasibi, Imam Muhasibi, he

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says, seek advice from those who tangibly, noticeably,

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fear Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala.

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Seek advice from those people that have God

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consciousness.

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That their priority is Allah.

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Now this is crazy, because listen to this.

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Normally we seek advice, we say what?

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Seek from those people who prioritize what?

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Prioritize you.

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Seek from those people who love you.

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But that's actually a flaw in and of

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itself.

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Because when I'm seeking advice from someone who

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loves me, that person out of their love

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for me might do what?

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Hey, do I look, did I put on

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a few pounds?

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No, you look great man.

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You look great.

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You sure?

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As I'm eating Dave's.

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No, no, you look good man, keep going,

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keep going.

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You look buff actually, right?

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Hey, was I rude when I spoke to

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them?

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No man, they're soft.

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They got to figure it out.

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People who love you might completely ignore your

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flaws out of love for you.

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People who don't like you, might just ignore

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your request altogether because, you know, actually they

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have a higher chance of being honest with

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you.

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Imam Ghazali says that.

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Imam Ghazali says, don't turn down the advice

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of someone who hates you, because they might

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just be super honest with you.

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But in reality, Imam al-Muhasabi says, if

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you seek advice, make sure that it's from

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somebody who is committed to Allah.

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Not to you only, but to Allah.

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Because that person will be advising you for

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the highest sake, and that is the sake

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of God.

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Advising someone for the sake of Allah, meaning

00:12:26 --> 00:12:26

what?

00:12:26 --> 00:12:29

The person themselves is not benefiting anything.

00:12:30 --> 00:12:32

You're asking me, I'm not benefiting.

00:12:32 --> 00:12:33

It's not like you're paying me, it's not

00:12:33 --> 00:12:36

like I'm gonna be elevated as a result.

00:12:36 --> 00:12:38

No, I'm advising you because I want what's

00:12:38 --> 00:12:40

best for you in terms of your relationship

00:12:40 --> 00:12:42

with Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala.

00:12:42 --> 00:12:45

So he says, consult those who have a

00:12:45 --> 00:12:49

good relationship, who fear and love and revere

00:12:49 --> 00:12:50

Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala.

00:12:50 --> 00:12:54

God mentions of His servants that the knowledgeable

00:12:54 --> 00:12:56

ones are the ones who have the status.

00:12:57 --> 00:12:59

The ones who have knowledge of Allah are

00:12:59 --> 00:13:02

the ones who by default are more reverent

00:13:02 --> 00:13:03

of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala.

00:13:03 --> 00:13:05

So if I'm trying to figure something out

00:13:05 --> 00:13:08

in my life, and I go to ask

00:13:08 --> 00:13:11

my friends that are the ones that are

00:13:11 --> 00:13:14

pulling me away from Allah, I'm only gonna

00:13:14 --> 00:13:16

get advice that pulls me further away.

00:13:17 --> 00:13:20

If I wanna get good advice, I have

00:13:20 --> 00:13:21

to find it in the places that are

00:13:21 --> 00:13:22

uncomfortable for me.

00:13:24 --> 00:13:25

Good advice only comes from places that are

00:13:25 --> 00:13:26

uncomfortable.

00:13:27 --> 00:13:31

Because if somebody is very very comfortable, they're

00:13:31 --> 00:13:33

gonna tend to not be as truthful as

00:13:33 --> 00:13:34

you need to hear.

00:13:34 --> 00:13:37

But if someone is willing to tell you

00:13:37 --> 00:13:39

the truth, by default it's going to make

00:13:39 --> 00:13:41

you feel a little bit uncomfortable.

00:13:42 --> 00:13:45

And so he says that the Prophet ﷺ

00:13:45 --> 00:13:51

said that ad-deenu an-naseeha, ad-deenu

00:13:51 --> 00:13:54

an-naseehatu, that this religion is sincere advice.

00:13:55 --> 00:13:57

And this statement is a really really short

00:13:57 --> 00:13:59

statement, it's only two words.

00:13:59 --> 00:14:02

But the Prophet ﷺ had a lot of

00:14:02 --> 00:14:02

meaning in this statement.

00:14:02 --> 00:14:04

The primary meaning is what?

00:14:05 --> 00:14:07

That if a person wants to experience this

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religion at its highest level, then they need

00:14:10 --> 00:14:12

to be willing to receive sincere advice.

00:14:12 --> 00:14:15

So step number one is that you have

00:14:15 --> 00:14:16

to first ask yourself the question.

00:14:16 --> 00:14:17

When you go to someone and you seek

00:14:17 --> 00:14:20

advice, the first question that you have to

00:14:20 --> 00:14:22

check off your box is, am I actually

00:14:22 --> 00:14:24

trying to get better or not?

00:14:24 --> 00:14:26

If I'm not trying to get better, many

00:14:26 --> 00:14:28

people come and ask questions but they just

00:14:28 --> 00:14:29

wanna hear what?

00:14:29 --> 00:14:33

They wanna hear some sort of compliment, or

00:14:33 --> 00:14:35

they wanna get an affirmation, right?

00:14:35 --> 00:14:36

They have a little bit of that bias.

00:14:37 --> 00:14:38

Just tell me what I wanna hear.

00:14:39 --> 00:14:40

And then the person starts going off track

00:14:40 --> 00:14:41

and they say, and by the way, this

00:14:41 --> 00:14:43

happened to me literally today, I can't share,

00:14:43 --> 00:14:44

but this happened to me today.

00:14:45 --> 00:14:46

You ask someone for advice and you're thinking,

00:14:46 --> 00:14:48

there's no advice to give, I'm perfect.

00:14:49 --> 00:14:50

And the person says, where should I start?

00:14:50 --> 00:14:51

And you're like, what?

00:14:51 --> 00:14:52

Audhu Billah.

00:14:52 --> 00:14:53

What did you just say?

00:14:53 --> 00:14:54

You're so offended.

00:14:55 --> 00:14:56

You're like, listen Shaytan, I've heard of you

00:14:56 --> 00:14:57

before, right?

00:14:57 --> 00:14:59

Leave my house, you know?

00:14:59 --> 00:15:03

The person first has to commit and humble

00:15:03 --> 00:15:04

themselves and say, you know what?

00:15:04 --> 00:15:05

Yes, I need this.

00:15:06 --> 00:15:06

I need this.

00:15:07 --> 00:15:09

I want you to think about the stories

00:15:09 --> 00:15:11

of the companions that are so inspiring.

00:15:11 --> 00:15:12

Like what makes them so amazing?

00:15:13 --> 00:15:15

What made them so amazing is that in

00:15:15 --> 00:15:18

the moments where they wanted to the least,

00:15:18 --> 00:15:19

they were able to humble themselves.

00:15:21 --> 00:15:22

Whether it was the Prophet, peace be upon

00:15:22 --> 00:15:23

him, engaging with them one-on-one.

00:15:24 --> 00:15:26

You know, Omar, peace be upon him, he

00:15:26 --> 00:15:27

came up to the Prophet, peace be upon

00:15:27 --> 00:15:28

him, there's a very famous narration where he

00:15:28 --> 00:15:32

says to the Prophet, Ya Rasulullah, the Prophet,

00:15:32 --> 00:15:33

peace be upon him, made an announcement.

00:15:34 --> 00:15:37

He says, none of you truly believe until

00:15:37 --> 00:15:40

your love for me, and this is, he's

00:15:40 --> 00:15:42

not boasting here, he's saying this as a

00:15:42 --> 00:15:42

messenger of Allah.

00:15:43 --> 00:15:46

Your love for me is greater than your

00:15:46 --> 00:15:50

love for your family, friends, yourself and everyone,

00:15:50 --> 00:15:51

all the world.

00:15:51 --> 00:15:52

Okay, and why?

00:15:52 --> 00:15:54

Because this is actually a very strong logical

00:15:54 --> 00:15:55

argument.

00:15:55 --> 00:15:58

Because if you love anybody else besides Allah

00:15:58 --> 00:16:02

and His Messenger, more than Allah's Messenger, you're

00:16:02 --> 00:16:03

going to listen to them more than you

00:16:03 --> 00:16:04

would listen to Allah's Messenger.

00:16:04 --> 00:16:06

So the Prophet, peace be upon him, is

00:16:06 --> 00:16:06

saying what?

00:16:07 --> 00:16:10

Your faith is proven when you can listen

00:16:10 --> 00:16:12

to the Sunnah more than you can listen

00:16:12 --> 00:16:14

to all of your other beloved people, including

00:16:14 --> 00:16:15

yourself.

00:16:16 --> 00:16:20

So, Omar, one of his best friends and

00:16:20 --> 00:16:22

closest companions, the second Khalifah after Abu Bakr

00:16:22 --> 00:16:25

as-Siddiq, he comes to the Prophet, peace

00:16:25 --> 00:16:28

be upon him, after some time, he says,

00:16:28 --> 00:16:33

Ya Rasulullah, I love you more than anybody.

00:16:34 --> 00:16:38

I love you except for myself.

00:16:39 --> 00:16:40

Except for myself.

00:16:41 --> 00:16:43

And he wasn't trying to be cute or

00:16:43 --> 00:16:44

funny, right?

00:16:44 --> 00:16:45

He wasn't trying to be like, you know.

00:16:46 --> 00:16:48

He was just saying, Ya Rasulullah, this is

00:16:48 --> 00:16:50

the truth.

00:16:50 --> 00:16:52

I went, I thought about it, I dug

00:16:52 --> 00:16:55

deep, and I realized that I don't know

00:16:55 --> 00:16:58

that I can say it with confidence that

00:16:58 --> 00:16:59

I truly love you more than I love

00:16:59 --> 00:17:00

myself.

00:17:01 --> 00:17:02

It's a struggle there.

00:17:03 --> 00:17:05

The Prophet, peace be upon him, he smiled

00:17:05 --> 00:17:07

and he said one word, I love it,

00:17:07 --> 00:17:07

one phrase.

00:17:08 --> 00:17:10

He goes, Not yet then, Omar, not yet.

00:17:10 --> 00:17:11

Not yet meaning what?

00:17:11 --> 00:17:14

You haven't actualized full faith.

00:17:14 --> 00:17:16

Your full potential has not been met.

00:17:16 --> 00:17:20

You're good, really good, but your full potential

00:17:20 --> 00:17:22

of who you can become has not been

00:17:22 --> 00:17:22

met.

00:17:23 --> 00:17:25

So then Omar went back, and Omar, he

00:17:25 --> 00:17:27

went, he thought more, he's like, okay.

00:17:28 --> 00:17:29

And I want you to think about this

00:17:29 --> 00:17:31

process which shows you something, by the way.

00:17:32 --> 00:17:33

You're not going to achieve greatness spiritually without

00:17:33 --> 00:17:34

thinking.

00:17:35 --> 00:17:38

You have to use your mind to process

00:17:38 --> 00:17:39

the spiritual journey you're on.

00:17:39 --> 00:17:41

So Omar goes back and he thinks.

00:17:41 --> 00:17:42

What kind of questions does he ask?

00:17:42 --> 00:17:44

We'll do this exercise now, okay?

00:17:44 --> 00:17:46

Have you guys ever done something for the

00:17:46 --> 00:17:49

sake of the religion that your body did

00:17:49 --> 00:17:49

not want to do?

00:17:50 --> 00:17:51

What's an example?

00:17:51 --> 00:17:52

Of doing something for the sake of Allah

00:17:53 --> 00:17:54

that your body did not want to do?

00:17:54 --> 00:17:55

Yes, Abbas.

00:17:56 --> 00:17:57

Exactly, fasting.

00:17:57 --> 00:17:58

Thank you.

00:17:58 --> 00:18:02

Everyone here, from a spiritual lens, let me

00:18:02 --> 00:18:04

just put out the disclaimer, okay, for those

00:18:04 --> 00:18:06

British Muslims that are going to cut this

00:18:06 --> 00:18:06

clip.

00:18:08 --> 00:18:09

Everyone loves Islam.

00:18:10 --> 00:18:11

Everyone loves fasting.

00:18:11 --> 00:18:14

But from a human lens, from the human

00:18:14 --> 00:18:16

experience, is it difficult?

00:18:17 --> 00:18:19

Okay, everyone's pious in here right now.

00:18:20 --> 00:18:21

Is it difficult to fast?

00:18:21 --> 00:18:22

Yes, it is.

00:18:22 --> 00:18:24

Does your life change a little bit?

00:18:24 --> 00:18:25

Do you get a little exhausted?

00:18:26 --> 00:18:27

Are you a little bit tired?

00:18:27 --> 00:18:28

Do you miss coffee?

00:18:28 --> 00:18:30

Yeah, is your breath a little bit fresh?

00:18:31 --> 00:18:33

Yeah, of course, although the angels love it.

00:18:33 --> 00:18:34

It's like musk to the angels, subhanAllah.

00:18:35 --> 00:18:37

So from the human lens, the human lens,

00:18:37 --> 00:18:38

which is the lower lens, right?

00:18:38 --> 00:18:39

The human lens is the lower one.

00:18:39 --> 00:18:42

As I told my son, he said, what

00:18:42 --> 00:18:43

happens when you die?

00:18:43 --> 00:18:44

I said, your body just stops.

00:18:44 --> 00:18:45

Your soul keeps going.

00:18:45 --> 00:18:48

So the human lens is just, it's ta

00:18:48 --> 00:18:49

'ban, right?

00:18:49 --> 00:18:50

Eventually your body will stop.

00:18:51 --> 00:18:53

But your soul loves fasting.

00:18:54 --> 00:18:54

Right?

00:18:54 --> 00:18:57

The hadith says, for the fasting person, there's

00:18:57 --> 00:18:57

two rewards.

00:18:58 --> 00:18:59

One is when they break their fast here.

00:18:59 --> 00:19:00

That's the bodily joy.

00:19:00 --> 00:19:02

But the real joy is when you meet

00:19:02 --> 00:19:03

Allah in Jannah.

00:19:04 --> 00:19:07

The second joy, that's the higher joy, okay?

00:19:08 --> 00:19:11

So, fasting, like Abbas just said, fasting is

00:19:11 --> 00:19:14

an example for us of something that, on

00:19:14 --> 00:19:16

paper, is very challenging, is very difficult.

00:19:16 --> 00:19:17

But we do it.

00:19:17 --> 00:19:17

Why do we do it?

00:19:17 --> 00:19:19

Because we love Allah.

00:19:20 --> 00:19:22

So we, Ahmad had to go through this

00:19:22 --> 00:19:22

exercise.

00:19:23 --> 00:19:27

When he proclaimed that he wasn't sure, then

00:19:27 --> 00:19:29

he went back and thought to himself, and

00:19:29 --> 00:19:31

after he thought, and he realized, you know

00:19:31 --> 00:19:31

what?

00:19:32 --> 00:19:35

I really do think, if push came to

00:19:35 --> 00:19:37

shove, if I had to, I would give

00:19:37 --> 00:19:38

it up.

00:19:38 --> 00:19:41

I would give up everything for the sake

00:19:41 --> 00:19:42

of Allah and His Messenger.

00:19:42 --> 00:19:44

I would prefer Allah and His Messenger over

00:19:44 --> 00:19:46

myself ten times out of ten.

00:19:47 --> 00:19:49

And don't think poorly about yourself right now.

00:19:49 --> 00:19:50

Because I know when we hear these stories,

00:19:50 --> 00:19:52

we're like, man, I'm so bad.

00:19:53 --> 00:19:54

I'm such a bad Muslim.

00:19:54 --> 00:19:54

No.

00:19:55 --> 00:19:58

You have, subhanAllah, proof that is secret between

00:19:58 --> 00:19:59

you and Allah.

00:20:00 --> 00:20:01

Nobody in here knows it.

00:20:01 --> 00:20:01

And don't share it.

00:20:01 --> 00:20:02

It's a little tacky.

00:20:03 --> 00:20:05

But you have moments between yourself and Allah

00:20:05 --> 00:20:08

where you have a portfolio of this sincerity.

00:20:09 --> 00:20:09

Only you know.

00:20:10 --> 00:20:11

You know, it might have been something very,

00:20:11 --> 00:20:14

very insignificant in our eyes and everyone else.

00:20:14 --> 00:20:16

But in your eyes, it was very heavy.

00:20:17 --> 00:20:18

It could have been holding your tongue back

00:20:18 --> 00:20:20

from somebody in a moment of anger.

00:20:21 --> 00:20:23

It could have been not showing something that

00:20:23 --> 00:20:24

you wanted to show.

00:20:25 --> 00:20:26

Not saying something you wanted to say.

00:20:27 --> 00:20:29

Not buying something that you wanted to buy.

00:20:30 --> 00:20:33

I had a friend who was getting something

00:20:33 --> 00:20:35

he wanted, and he didn't realize, but in

00:20:35 --> 00:20:37

that transaction, there was interest.

00:20:38 --> 00:20:40

And he said, wallahi, he left the signing

00:20:40 --> 00:20:42

table, and he came and he said, man,

00:20:43 --> 00:20:45

wallahi, he goes, I looked around the room

00:20:46 --> 00:20:48

when the paper was in front of me,

00:20:48 --> 00:20:50

I looked around the room, and I said

00:20:50 --> 00:20:53

to myself, like, no one's here right now.

00:20:53 --> 00:20:54

I could do it.

00:20:55 --> 00:20:57

And then he said, and then I felt

00:20:57 --> 00:20:59

the angels on my shoulders.

00:20:59 --> 00:21:01

And I realized that this is not what

00:21:01 --> 00:21:02

I want to do.

00:21:02 --> 00:21:04

I don't want to do this transaction, this

00:21:04 --> 00:21:06

deal that Allah has forbidden for me, just

00:21:06 --> 00:21:07

because no one's in the room.

00:21:07 --> 00:21:09

And that's an example of what?

00:21:09 --> 00:21:11

Of what Omar had to do.

00:21:11 --> 00:21:12

He had to go through that.

00:21:12 --> 00:21:13

So don't sell yourself short.

00:21:13 --> 00:21:14

You have these moments.

00:21:14 --> 00:21:15

So then he goes to the Prophet, he

00:21:15 --> 00:21:18

says, Ya Rasulullah, I went and I thought

00:21:18 --> 00:21:20

about it, and I realized, I do love

00:21:20 --> 00:21:21

you more than I love myself.

00:21:21 --> 00:21:24

And the Prophet said, al-an, ya Omar,

00:21:24 --> 00:21:24

now.

00:21:25 --> 00:21:27

Now you know what it means to be

00:21:27 --> 00:21:28

a person of belief.

00:21:29 --> 00:21:33

And so the Prophet, this sincere advice that

00:21:33 --> 00:21:35

we all seek, it's trying to get us

00:21:35 --> 00:21:36

up to that state.

00:21:37 --> 00:21:39

He said, one should be sincere to all

00:21:39 --> 00:21:41

Muslims including to leadership.

00:21:42 --> 00:21:43

And then listen to this line.

00:21:44 --> 00:21:45

This is where it's going to get a

00:21:45 --> 00:21:48

little bit inshallah, good, sharp.

00:21:48 --> 00:21:51

He says, when you receive advice, you have

00:21:51 --> 00:21:54

to convince yourself of a couple things.

00:21:54 --> 00:21:56

And this is what's going to open the

00:21:56 --> 00:21:57

door to the benefit of the advice.

00:21:57 --> 00:21:59

Otherwise, if you don't convince yourself, you're never

00:21:59 --> 00:22:00

going to be able to take it.

00:22:00 --> 00:22:03

Number one, he says, convince yourself that the

00:22:03 --> 00:22:06

person giving you advice, they're doing it because

00:22:06 --> 00:22:06

they love you.

00:22:07 --> 00:22:10

The person who's sitting there advising you, they're

00:22:10 --> 00:22:11

doing it because they love you.

00:22:12 --> 00:22:13

And they want to see you benefit.

00:22:14 --> 00:22:14

They want to see you grow.

00:22:16 --> 00:22:19

Now the nafs, our nafsical response is what?

00:22:20 --> 00:22:20

No way.

00:22:20 --> 00:22:21

Get away from me.

00:22:22 --> 00:22:23

I don't want to have anything to do

00:22:23 --> 00:22:23

with you.

00:22:23 --> 00:22:24

What are you talking about?

00:22:24 --> 00:22:25

You don't know my story.

00:22:25 --> 00:22:26

You don't know my truth.

00:22:27 --> 00:22:30

But Imam al-Hasibi says, as long as

00:22:30 --> 00:22:31

that is your response and that's how you

00:22:31 --> 00:22:33

entertain advice, say goodbye.

00:22:34 --> 00:22:35

What happens there?

00:22:35 --> 00:22:36

Number one, you're not listening.

00:22:37 --> 00:22:39

Number two, and this is the bigger danger,

00:22:39 --> 00:22:42

all of those people that love you, that

00:22:42 --> 00:22:44

wanted to be advising to you and connect

00:22:44 --> 00:22:46

to you and grow you, they eventually lose

00:22:46 --> 00:22:47

hope.

00:22:48 --> 00:22:48

People are people.

00:22:49 --> 00:22:50

Human beings are human.

00:22:50 --> 00:22:52

We can only advise for a certain amount

00:22:52 --> 00:22:52

of time.

00:22:52 --> 00:22:55

Even the prophets of Allah, when they advised

00:22:55 --> 00:22:58

they ended up eventually what?

00:22:59 --> 00:23:00

I mean you have the story of Lut,

00:23:01 --> 00:23:03

you have the story of Nuh, you have

00:23:03 --> 00:23:05

the story of Yunus, all these prophets, they

00:23:05 --> 00:23:10

preached and taught until the rejection was received.

00:23:10 --> 00:23:11

Okay, I get it.

00:23:11 --> 00:23:12

You don't want to listen anymore.

00:23:12 --> 00:23:14

So when somebody comes to us and tells

00:23:14 --> 00:23:17

us something, we can push back for the

00:23:17 --> 00:23:19

sake of preserving our ego and make ourselves

00:23:19 --> 00:23:19

feel good.

00:23:20 --> 00:23:22

But what are we losing in that moment?

00:23:23 --> 00:23:24

We might be preserving our pride but we're

00:23:24 --> 00:23:25

losing a good friend.

00:23:26 --> 00:23:30

We're losing words of advice are worth their

00:23:30 --> 00:23:30

weight in gold.

00:23:32 --> 00:23:35

And if somebody is willing to put their

00:23:36 --> 00:23:38

relationship with you on the line in order

00:23:38 --> 00:23:39

to tell you something that you need to

00:23:39 --> 00:23:42

hear, that's usually an indication that this person

00:23:42 --> 00:23:42

is a good person.

00:23:43 --> 00:23:45

So he says, know that the one that

00:23:45 --> 00:23:48

is sincerely advising you has displayed one of

00:23:48 --> 00:23:51

the highest levels of love for you.

00:23:52 --> 00:23:55

The commentator here says, in Islam, we have

00:23:55 --> 00:23:59

tests that indicate our traits, that tell us

00:23:59 --> 00:24:00

about ourselves.

00:24:00 --> 00:24:02

And he says the way we react is

00:24:02 --> 00:24:03

who we really are.

00:24:04 --> 00:24:05

So you might tell yourself, you know what,

00:24:06 --> 00:24:07

I'm a pretty approachable person.

00:24:07 --> 00:24:08

I'm pretty patient.

00:24:09 --> 00:24:09

I'm kind.

00:24:10 --> 00:24:11

But then when someone comes to you with

00:24:11 --> 00:24:14

advice and you're like, turning to like a

00:24:14 --> 00:24:16

bear, you know, you get angry.

00:24:16 --> 00:24:18

I keep thinking of my daughter for some

00:24:18 --> 00:24:18

reason.

00:24:19 --> 00:24:20

You know, I advise her.

00:24:22 --> 00:24:23

So if that's the...

00:24:23 --> 00:24:24

She's a kid, right?

00:24:24 --> 00:24:26

The angels are not writing her deeds yet,

00:24:26 --> 00:24:27

but for us they are.

00:24:27 --> 00:24:30

So if someone comes and advises me and

00:24:30 --> 00:24:33

my response is to push that person or

00:24:33 --> 00:24:36

to be upset or to counter back at

00:24:36 --> 00:24:39

them and to insult them back, then I

00:24:39 --> 00:24:40

don't care how patient or kind or approachable

00:24:40 --> 00:24:41

a person thinks they are.

00:24:42 --> 00:24:43

Your actions have spoken louder than your words.

00:24:44 --> 00:24:45

So he says actions are the measure of

00:24:45 --> 00:24:48

true faith and good faith will always give

00:24:48 --> 00:24:50

way to good actions.

00:24:51 --> 00:24:52

Good faith will always open the door to

00:24:52 --> 00:24:53

good actions.

00:24:54 --> 00:24:57

He says one test that we constantly are

00:24:57 --> 00:25:00

put in is the test of receiving advice.

00:25:01 --> 00:25:03

There's also another test, which is the test

00:25:03 --> 00:25:04

of giving advice.

00:25:04 --> 00:25:05

How many of you find it difficult to

00:25:05 --> 00:25:07

give advice when you know someone needs it?

00:25:08 --> 00:25:09

Anyone here?

00:25:09 --> 00:25:11

How many of you like to avoid conflict?

00:25:12 --> 00:25:12

There we go.

00:25:13 --> 00:25:13

That one.

00:25:13 --> 00:25:13

See?

00:25:13 --> 00:25:14

You're not even raising your hand, you like

00:25:14 --> 00:25:15

to avoid conflict so much.

00:25:16 --> 00:25:17

You're like, if I raise my hand, we're

00:25:17 --> 00:25:18

going to have conflict, right?

00:25:19 --> 00:25:20

You're all conflict avoidant.

00:25:20 --> 00:25:20

No.

00:25:20 --> 00:25:22

So he says one of the tests is

00:25:22 --> 00:25:24

receiving advice, and this is true, but one

00:25:24 --> 00:25:26

of the tests is also when a person

00:25:26 --> 00:25:28

doesn't have the courage to give advice.

00:25:29 --> 00:25:30

And I said this because why?

00:25:31 --> 00:25:32

Because we love them, but it's actually a

00:25:32 --> 00:25:33

little bit counterproductive.

00:25:33 --> 00:25:34

It's counterintuitive.

00:25:34 --> 00:25:36

If you love somebody you wouldn't want to

00:25:36 --> 00:25:37

see them suffer.

00:25:37 --> 00:25:39

But it's one of the hardest things to

00:25:39 --> 00:25:42

do because that pain is very challenging.

00:25:43 --> 00:25:45

In Arabic, one of the words that they

00:25:45 --> 00:25:47

use for needle actually comes from the root

00:25:47 --> 00:25:48

word which comes from nasaha.

00:25:49 --> 00:25:51

And the reason why the scholars said that

00:25:51 --> 00:25:53

a needle shares the same root word as

00:25:53 --> 00:25:56

advice is because when you're patching something up,

00:25:57 --> 00:26:00

when you're fixing something, a garment, you have

00:26:00 --> 00:26:01

to use a very sharp tool.

00:26:02 --> 00:26:04

If you use a needle that's not sharp,

00:26:04 --> 00:26:05

it's not going to pierce the thread.

00:26:06 --> 00:26:07

And then how are you going to pull

00:26:07 --> 00:26:09

the thread through and patch up the actual

00:26:09 --> 00:26:10

garment?

00:26:10 --> 00:26:11

You're never going to be able to do

00:26:11 --> 00:26:11

it.

00:26:12 --> 00:26:15

In order for you to effectively repair something,

00:26:16 --> 00:26:17

the needle has to be very sharp.

00:26:18 --> 00:26:21

But once you pierce the first one, it

00:26:21 --> 00:26:22

flows very easily.

00:26:22 --> 00:26:24

And this is the example of advice.

00:26:25 --> 00:26:27

When we receive advice or we give advice,

00:26:28 --> 00:26:29

it's always the start that's difficult.

00:26:30 --> 00:26:33

It's always the piercing, the sharpness, the edge.

00:26:34 --> 00:26:36

Nobody likes to hear it and nobody likes

00:26:36 --> 00:26:37

to be the one delivering it.

00:26:38 --> 00:26:40

But if you can get past that point,

00:26:41 --> 00:26:42

you'll see something beautiful.

00:26:43 --> 00:26:45

And there are people, subhanAllah, have you guys

00:26:45 --> 00:26:47

ever gone and gotten your garments tailored or

00:26:47 --> 00:26:47

something?

00:26:48 --> 00:26:50

Let me rephrase that.

00:26:50 --> 00:26:51

Have you guys ever asked your mom or

00:26:51 --> 00:26:52

dad where you can get your garments retailed?

00:26:53 --> 00:26:54

Like we're going to take it to this

00:26:54 --> 00:26:55

auntie in Carrollton, right?

00:26:58 --> 00:27:04

A really good tailor or seamstress, someone that

00:27:04 --> 00:27:06

knows what they're doing, they can repair it

00:27:06 --> 00:27:09

wallahi as if it was never damaged in

00:27:09 --> 00:27:09

the first place.

00:27:10 --> 00:27:12

They can repair it and you won't even

00:27:12 --> 00:27:13

be able to tell.

00:27:13 --> 00:27:14

If you showed the garments to somebody, you're

00:27:14 --> 00:27:17

like tell me where the original tear was

00:27:17 --> 00:27:18

or the hole was or something.

00:27:19 --> 00:27:20

They'll look and they're like, I can't see

00:27:20 --> 00:27:21

it.

00:27:21 --> 00:27:22

I can't tell.

00:27:22 --> 00:27:23

Even you sometimes.

00:27:23 --> 00:27:23

You owned it.

00:27:23 --> 00:27:24

You're the one who wore it.

00:27:24 --> 00:27:25

You can't see it.

00:27:25 --> 00:27:27

If you give advice in a beautiful way,

00:27:28 --> 00:27:30

the person receiving it can't even tell you're

00:27:30 --> 00:27:30

giving it.

00:27:31 --> 00:27:34

It falls onto them, even though there's a

00:27:34 --> 00:27:36

little bit of a pinch, but it falls

00:27:36 --> 00:27:37

onto them so beautifully.

00:27:38 --> 00:27:40

There's a story that's attributed to Sayyidina Ali

00:27:40 --> 00:27:42

radiyallahu anhu and some of it attributed to

00:27:42 --> 00:27:42

his son.

00:27:44 --> 00:27:47

And it says, the story goes that there

00:27:47 --> 00:27:48

was a man who was making wudu and

00:27:48 --> 00:27:49

he was doing it incorrectly.

00:27:50 --> 00:27:51

And in the time he was making wudu

00:27:51 --> 00:27:55

incorrectly, obviously, Ali radiyallahu anhu he knows how

00:27:55 --> 00:27:56

to make wudu correctly, of course.

00:27:57 --> 00:27:57

Right?

00:27:58 --> 00:28:00

But he's trying to figure out, okay, how

00:28:00 --> 00:28:01

do I tell this person that they're making

00:28:01 --> 00:28:01

a mistake?

00:28:02 --> 00:28:03

How do I tell this person that they're

00:28:03 --> 00:28:04

not making wudu properly?

00:28:05 --> 00:28:08

And so he thinks about it and then

00:28:08 --> 00:28:10

he goes to the guy and he says

00:28:10 --> 00:28:14

to him, hey, do you mind doing me

00:28:14 --> 00:28:15

a favor?

00:28:15 --> 00:28:16

And the guy says, what?

00:28:16 --> 00:28:17

He says, can you teach me how to

00:28:17 --> 00:28:18

make wudu?

00:28:18 --> 00:28:21

Ali is asking somebody how to make wudu.

00:28:21 --> 00:28:23

Wudu is the washing up before prayer.

00:28:23 --> 00:28:25

Can you teach me how to make wudu?

00:28:25 --> 00:28:27

So the guy looks at Ali and they

00:28:27 --> 00:28:30

all know who Ali radiyallahu anhu is, okay?

00:28:30 --> 00:28:31

He's from Ahlulbayt, he's from the family of

00:28:31 --> 00:28:34

the Prophet ﷺ, he's his cousin, he's the

00:28:34 --> 00:28:34

fourth khalifah.

00:28:34 --> 00:28:35

Like, come on.

00:28:36 --> 00:28:37

You really don't know how to make wudu?

00:28:38 --> 00:28:38

Right?

00:28:39 --> 00:28:43

So, he the guy in that moment doesn't

00:28:43 --> 00:28:45

even think about his own flawed wudu being

00:28:45 --> 00:28:46

like under attack.

00:28:47 --> 00:28:49

He looks back at Ali radiyallahu anhu and

00:28:49 --> 00:28:51

he says, actually, it's kind of embarrassing that

00:28:51 --> 00:28:53

you're asking me to teach you because I

00:28:53 --> 00:28:54

don't really know how.

00:28:55 --> 00:28:55

I forgot.

00:28:55 --> 00:28:57

I forgot the steps.

00:28:58 --> 00:29:00

So then Ali goes, oh, I actually know

00:29:00 --> 00:29:01

the steps.

00:29:02 --> 00:29:04

I just needed some help with some details

00:29:04 --> 00:29:05

but I can teach you with the steps.

00:29:06 --> 00:29:07

And he goes, together we'll figure it out.

00:29:08 --> 00:29:09

Right?

00:29:09 --> 00:29:10

Together we'll figure it out.

00:29:10 --> 00:29:11

And the guy's like, yes!

00:29:12 --> 00:29:13

But think about it.

00:29:13 --> 00:29:16

In the guy's mind, Ali is like asking

00:29:16 --> 00:29:17

questions.

00:29:18 --> 00:29:19

He's like, do you go up to the

00:29:19 --> 00:29:20

elbow with the arms?

00:29:20 --> 00:29:21

He goes, yeah, yeah, up to the back,

00:29:21 --> 00:29:22

past the elbow.

00:29:22 --> 00:29:23

Do you rinse your mouth?

00:29:23 --> 00:29:24

Or do you just do your teeth?

00:29:25 --> 00:29:25

Yeah, you do your mouth.

00:29:25 --> 00:29:28

So he's setting the guy up so the

00:29:28 --> 00:29:29

guy doesn't feel what?

00:29:30 --> 00:29:31

Doesn't feel demoralized.

00:29:31 --> 00:29:32

Doesn't feel like he's losing his dignity.

00:29:33 --> 00:29:36

But in a way, without realizing it, that

00:29:36 --> 00:29:38

man is being elevated because Ali is teaching

00:29:38 --> 00:29:40

him how to do something so elementary, so

00:29:40 --> 00:29:40

basic.

00:29:41 --> 00:29:41

Right?

00:29:42 --> 00:29:43

Now this is a lesson for all of

00:29:43 --> 00:29:43

us.

00:29:44 --> 00:29:47

How many of us are really, really, really

00:29:48 --> 00:29:51

we get frustrated because people don't take our

00:29:51 --> 00:29:52

advice but maybe we're just really bad at

00:29:52 --> 00:29:53

giving it.

00:29:54 --> 00:29:56

Maybe it's not their fault.

00:29:56 --> 00:29:57

Maybe it's our fault.

00:29:58 --> 00:30:00

Maybe we're not being patient enough and creative

00:30:00 --> 00:30:00

enough.

00:30:01 --> 00:30:03

Maybe we're not being gentle enough.

00:30:04 --> 00:30:05

You know, if somebody were to tell you

00:30:05 --> 00:30:07

that, you know, I would listen to you

00:30:07 --> 00:30:08

but your words are just too harsh.

00:30:08 --> 00:30:09

That's an indication.

00:30:10 --> 00:30:11

Right?

00:30:11 --> 00:30:13

And so we like to point the finger

00:30:13 --> 00:30:13

towards people.

00:30:14 --> 00:30:16

And I'm speaking to myself here too.

00:30:16 --> 00:30:17

I'm 36 years old.

00:30:18 --> 00:30:19

So when I look at people who are

00:30:19 --> 00:30:22

like in the younger generations, I see them

00:30:22 --> 00:30:24

as being very difficult to advise sometimes.

00:30:24 --> 00:30:25

But maybe I'm the problem.

00:30:26 --> 00:30:27

Maybe I need to be someone who's a

00:30:27 --> 00:30:28

little bit more patient in how I give

00:30:28 --> 00:30:29

the advice.

00:30:30 --> 00:30:31

As a father of two young kids.

00:30:32 --> 00:30:33

You know?

00:30:33 --> 00:30:35

And your kids, subhanAllah, any parents here?

00:30:36 --> 00:30:37

Your kids will talk back to you and

00:30:37 --> 00:30:38

actually tell you.

00:30:39 --> 00:30:40

They say, I know you're right but you're

00:30:40 --> 00:30:41

just mean.

00:30:43 --> 00:30:43

Right?

00:30:43 --> 00:30:44

They'll be crying.

00:30:44 --> 00:30:46

They're like, you're right, I know but stop

00:30:46 --> 00:30:46

being so mean.

00:30:46 --> 00:30:48

And you're like, okay.

00:30:49 --> 00:30:51

And at that point you lost actually.

00:30:51 --> 00:30:53

You think you won but you lost.

00:30:54 --> 00:30:57

Because you sold the message for the sake

00:30:57 --> 00:30:58

of your ego.

00:30:59 --> 00:31:01

And this is why the Prophet, was so

00:31:01 --> 00:31:02

beautiful.

00:31:03 --> 00:31:06

His ego was non-existent.

00:31:07 --> 00:31:10

Being stomped on, trampled on, pushed to the

00:31:10 --> 00:31:15

ground, abused, attacked, harassed, tormented, you name it.

00:31:16 --> 00:31:18

But he never let his ego get in

00:31:18 --> 00:31:19

the way of the message.

00:31:20 --> 00:31:21

The message was too important.

00:31:22 --> 00:31:23

It was too important.

00:31:24 --> 00:31:26

So the trick in giving good advice is

00:31:26 --> 00:31:30

realizing that if you put your ego in

00:31:30 --> 00:31:32

front of the advice, you're making yourself more

00:31:32 --> 00:31:34

important than the other person.

00:31:34 --> 00:31:35

You're just trying to win.

00:31:36 --> 00:31:37

You're just trying to celebrate.

00:31:38 --> 00:31:39

I am the victor.

00:31:39 --> 00:31:40

I know more than you.

00:31:41 --> 00:31:42

You are not as smart as I am.

00:31:42 --> 00:31:43

You're not as this as I am.

00:31:44 --> 00:31:46

And in that battle you feel like you've

00:31:46 --> 00:31:48

won but wallahi you're the loser.

00:31:48 --> 00:31:49

You're the loser.

00:31:49 --> 00:31:53

Because that person now has been repelled away

00:31:53 --> 00:31:54

from you and maybe from everybody.

00:31:55 --> 00:31:57

How many people run away from religion all

00:31:57 --> 00:32:00

together because one person gave really bad religious

00:32:00 --> 00:32:00

advice?

00:32:01 --> 00:32:02

Or in a bad way?

00:32:03 --> 00:32:03

I'll never forget.

00:32:04 --> 00:32:05

I was in the UK of course.

00:32:06 --> 00:32:10

And I was praying at a masjid.

00:32:10 --> 00:32:12

And I didn't have my kufi on.

00:32:13 --> 00:32:14

Sometimes my kufi gives me headaches, especially when

00:32:14 --> 00:32:15

my hair gets longer.

00:32:16 --> 00:32:16

So I didn't have my kufi on.

00:32:17 --> 00:32:18

I was just stopping to pray at a

00:32:18 --> 00:32:19

random masjid.

00:32:20 --> 00:32:21

The kufi is the hat, right?

00:32:21 --> 00:32:22

It's the sunnah of the Prophet ﷺ for

00:32:22 --> 00:32:23

men to wear it.

00:32:23 --> 00:32:25

Especially when they're praying to cover their head

00:32:25 --> 00:32:25

if they can.

00:32:25 --> 00:32:26

So not necessary.

00:32:27 --> 00:32:29

So I was in the masjid and I

00:32:29 --> 00:32:31

was praying and it was a Hanafi masjid

00:32:31 --> 00:32:32

and they tend to be a little bit

00:32:32 --> 00:32:34

more committed to the kufi.

00:32:34 --> 00:32:36

That's a great podcast name by the way.

00:32:36 --> 00:32:36

Committed to the kufi.

00:32:36 --> 00:32:37

Okay.

00:32:38 --> 00:32:40

Although we don't need any more Muslim male

00:32:40 --> 00:32:40

podcasts.

00:32:41 --> 00:32:42

We can pause on that.

00:32:42 --> 00:32:44

Our quota has been met for the 2000s.

00:32:44 --> 00:32:45

So I think we just wait until 3000.

00:32:46 --> 00:32:50

So this uncle comes up to me.

00:32:50 --> 00:32:53

I'm assuming gently because I was obviously facing

00:32:53 --> 00:32:54

the qibla.

00:32:54 --> 00:32:56

And from behind all I feel is this.

00:32:56 --> 00:32:57

I just feel this.

00:32:59 --> 00:33:01

And it sat on my head like that.

00:33:01 --> 00:33:01

Literally.

00:33:03 --> 00:33:06

And I remember just being like, really?

00:33:07 --> 00:33:09

And it was one of those I don't

00:33:09 --> 00:33:10

know if you guys have seen the communal

00:33:10 --> 00:33:12

kufis but they're not like nice cloth ones.

00:33:12 --> 00:33:14

They're like this really hard plastic with spiky

00:33:14 --> 00:33:15

edges.

00:33:15 --> 00:33:17

They look like the tops of you know

00:33:17 --> 00:33:18

the towers of castles.

00:33:18 --> 00:33:20

They look like those but upside down.

00:33:20 --> 00:33:21

And he puts it on my head.

00:33:22 --> 00:33:24

And I remember thinking to myself, I'm old

00:33:24 --> 00:33:26

enough to understand the context of where this

00:33:26 --> 00:33:27

guy is coming from.

00:33:27 --> 00:33:27

I get it.

00:33:28 --> 00:33:30

But I said how many people in the

00:33:30 --> 00:33:32

same situation maybe if they were younger or

00:33:32 --> 00:33:34

at a more sensitive point in their life

00:33:34 --> 00:33:37

they would be really really pushed away and

00:33:37 --> 00:33:38

turned off by this experience.

00:33:39 --> 00:33:42

So as the advisor, as the advice giver

00:33:42 --> 00:33:44

we have to be very very careful.

00:33:46 --> 00:33:47

Giving advice is an art.

00:33:48 --> 00:33:49

It's an art.

00:33:50 --> 00:33:51

It's tiring.

00:33:52 --> 00:33:54

It's depleting.

00:33:54 --> 00:33:55

It's exhausting.

00:33:56 --> 00:34:00

If you're good at giving advice, you're always

00:34:00 --> 00:34:00

fatigued.

00:34:01 --> 00:34:04

Because you are trying your best to preserve

00:34:04 --> 00:34:06

the heart of the person that you're trying

00:34:06 --> 00:34:06

to help.

00:34:07 --> 00:34:09

It's easy to destroy something.

00:34:09 --> 00:34:10

It's hard to build it.

00:34:11 --> 00:34:13

It's easy to demolish a building.

00:34:13 --> 00:34:14

It's hard to construct one.

00:34:15 --> 00:34:18

People are much more prone to destroying something

00:34:18 --> 00:34:19

than building because it takes less energy to

00:34:19 --> 00:34:20

destroy.

00:34:21 --> 00:34:23

It even costs less in construction to demolish

00:34:23 --> 00:34:24

a wall versus building one.

00:34:25 --> 00:34:27

So giving advice is an art.

00:34:27 --> 00:34:29

Now the next part and we'll end here.

00:34:29 --> 00:34:31

There's also another art.

00:34:32 --> 00:34:34

And that is receiving bad advice.

00:34:35 --> 00:34:41

How can we receive advice that lands sharply?

00:34:42 --> 00:34:45

And this is where Imam Ghazali he gives

00:34:45 --> 00:34:47

a gentle word to the wise.

00:34:47 --> 00:34:50

He says, if somebody comes to you and

00:34:50 --> 00:34:52

puts that sharp plastic kufi on your head.

00:34:53 --> 00:34:54

This is like pre-Covid right?

00:34:54 --> 00:34:56

But imagine this happened.

00:34:56 --> 00:35:00

He says you can you know you're fully

00:35:00 --> 00:35:01

I guess in your right to turn back

00:35:01 --> 00:35:03

to that person and be like how dare

00:35:03 --> 00:35:05

you don't touch me blah blah blah all

00:35:05 --> 00:35:05

this.

00:35:06 --> 00:35:07

It's not even wajib.

00:35:07 --> 00:35:08

It's not obligatory.

00:35:08 --> 00:35:09

What are you doing?

00:35:09 --> 00:35:13

Or he said the true believer the true

00:35:14 --> 00:35:16

mu'min or mu'mina.

00:35:17 --> 00:35:19

They are able to hear the advice that

00:35:19 --> 00:35:22

has fallen so harshly on them and they're

00:35:22 --> 00:35:24

able to take it beautifully.

00:35:24 --> 00:35:26

Just like the one is creative in giving

00:35:26 --> 00:35:28

we also have to be creative in receiving.

00:35:29 --> 00:35:31

How many of us have ever heard one

00:35:31 --> 00:35:32

of my good good friends he wrote a

00:35:32 --> 00:35:34

beautiful piece an article online.

00:35:35 --> 00:35:36

It was called how to listen to a

00:35:36 --> 00:35:37

bad khutbah.

00:35:38 --> 00:35:40

I thought it was the best article.

00:35:41 --> 00:35:43

How to listen to a bad khutbah.

00:35:43 --> 00:35:43

You know why?

00:35:44 --> 00:35:46

Because there are a lot of bad khutbahs.

00:35:47 --> 00:35:49

If you come to mind you've heard one

00:35:49 --> 00:35:49

right?

00:35:49 --> 00:35:51

We give a lot of bad khutbahs and

00:35:51 --> 00:35:53

everybody sits there and they're like man this

00:35:53 --> 00:35:55

guy this, this guy that, this guy's got

00:35:55 --> 00:35:56

an accent this guy blah blah blah.

00:35:58 --> 00:35:59

It's easy.

00:35:59 --> 00:36:01

It's too easy to critique a khutbah and

00:36:01 --> 00:36:01

say I didn't learn anything.

00:36:02 --> 00:36:03

You're letting shaitan win.

00:36:04 --> 00:36:04

That's the easy way out.

00:36:05 --> 00:36:06

It's too easy to sit in front of

00:36:06 --> 00:36:08

somebody who's being a little bit harsh with

00:36:08 --> 00:36:09

you and you say you know what?

00:36:10 --> 00:36:10

Forget them.

00:36:10 --> 00:36:12

I don't need anything from them.

00:36:12 --> 00:36:12

It's too easy.

00:36:14 --> 00:36:15

The believer doesn't take the easy route.

00:36:16 --> 00:36:18

The believer understands that you know what?

00:36:19 --> 00:36:24

That khutbah was like a C- at

00:36:24 --> 00:36:24

best.

00:36:25 --> 00:36:28

But even a C- has some right

00:36:28 --> 00:36:29

answers.

00:36:30 --> 00:36:32

Even an exam that gets a C-

00:36:32 --> 00:36:33

some of the answers are right.

00:36:34 --> 00:36:36

That advice that was given was too sharp

00:36:36 --> 00:36:39

but even a broken clock is right twice

00:36:39 --> 00:36:40

a day.

00:36:41 --> 00:36:46

So for us as individuals Is that my

00:36:46 --> 00:36:47

closing music?

00:36:47 --> 00:36:48

That's my ending music?

00:36:48 --> 00:36:52

For us as individuals when you give advice

00:36:52 --> 00:36:52

be creative.

00:36:52 --> 00:36:55

When you receive advice make sure that you're

00:36:55 --> 00:37:00

just as creative and just as empathetic to

00:37:00 --> 00:37:01

the advice giver.

00:37:02 --> 00:37:05

Make sure you have just as much empathy

00:37:05 --> 00:37:07

for the one giving the advice.

00:37:07 --> 00:37:08

Maybe they're off.

00:37:08 --> 00:37:08

That's okay.

00:37:09 --> 00:37:11

But is what they're saying valid?

00:37:13 --> 00:37:14

Maybe that they were a little bit sharp

00:37:14 --> 00:37:15

in their tongue.

00:37:15 --> 00:37:15

Okay.

00:37:15 --> 00:37:16

I get it.

00:37:16 --> 00:37:16

Not good.

00:37:16 --> 00:37:17

Not prophetic.

00:37:18 --> 00:37:19

But is what they're saying applicable?

00:37:21 --> 00:37:22

Can you benefit from it?

00:37:23 --> 00:37:27

If the answer is yes elevate yourself to

00:37:27 --> 00:37:28

a better status.

00:37:28 --> 00:37:31

But if we constantly want to disqualify what

00:37:31 --> 00:37:33

people tell us because it wasn't told to

00:37:33 --> 00:37:37

us exactly right we're never going to get

00:37:37 --> 00:37:37

better.

00:37:38 --> 00:37:39

And we're always going to have a reason

00:37:39 --> 00:37:40

to say no.

00:37:40 --> 00:37:41

I don't want to listen to you.

00:37:41 --> 00:37:41

And that's fine.

00:37:41 --> 00:37:42

But guess what?

00:37:42 --> 00:37:46

A person who constantly rejects feedback never grows.

00:37:46 --> 00:37:48

And if we want to grow towards Allah

00:37:48 --> 00:37:50

sometimes the advice is going to be beautiful.

00:37:50 --> 00:37:52

Sometimes it's going to be less than beautiful.

00:37:52 --> 00:37:53

And we have to be willing to take

00:37:53 --> 00:37:53

both scenarios.

00:37:54 --> 00:37:55

We ask Allah to give us Tawfiq.

00:37:56 --> 00:37:56

Okay.

00:37:56 --> 00:37:57

Let's do some Q&A inshallah.

00:37:59 --> 00:38:03

Real quick before we conclude.

00:38:04 --> 00:38:07

So slido.com and then heartwork inshallah.

00:38:07 --> 00:38:08

I forgot to open it.

00:38:08 --> 00:38:08

It's open now.

00:38:09 --> 00:38:10

So if you go now you can ask

00:38:10 --> 00:38:10

questions inshallah.

00:38:11 --> 00:38:12

And then what we'll do is we'll conclude

00:38:12 --> 00:38:14

in four minutes and then maghrib is going

00:38:14 --> 00:38:18

to be at 7.52 inshallah.

00:38:19 --> 00:38:20

Please get me married.

00:38:20 --> 00:38:21

That's the first question.

00:38:22 --> 00:38:23

Brother or sister.

00:38:24 --> 00:38:24

I don't know who.

00:38:25 --> 00:38:28

You failed because Allah is the one you

00:38:28 --> 00:38:28

should be asking.

00:38:28 --> 00:38:29

Not me.

00:38:30 --> 00:38:32

And if Allah did not do anything for

00:38:32 --> 00:38:33

you, I can't help you.

00:38:34 --> 00:38:34

Alright.

00:38:34 --> 00:38:35

Mark has answered.

00:38:35 --> 00:38:35

There we go.

00:38:36 --> 00:38:36

Okay.

00:38:36 --> 00:38:37

Good question.

00:38:37 --> 00:38:37

This is a good one.

00:38:38 --> 00:38:41

Can you give me a recommendation on a

00:38:41 --> 00:38:43

book of the life of the Prophet sallallahu

00:38:43 --> 00:38:43

alayhi wa sallam.

00:38:44 --> 00:38:44

Autobiography.

00:38:44 --> 00:38:46

Well, it's not an autobiography because he didn't

00:38:46 --> 00:38:46

write it.

00:38:47 --> 00:38:48

They were autobiography.

00:38:48 --> 00:38:50

A recommendation on the biography of the life

00:38:50 --> 00:38:50

of the Prophet.

00:38:51 --> 00:38:51

Yes, I can.

00:38:51 --> 00:38:52

Okay.

00:38:52 --> 00:38:52

A few different ones.

00:38:53 --> 00:38:55

One of the better ones that I've ever

00:38:55 --> 00:38:59

come across is In the Footsteps of the

00:38:59 --> 00:38:59

Messenger.

00:39:00 --> 00:39:02

If you look it up on Amazon you

00:39:02 --> 00:39:03

can type In the Footsteps of the Messenger.

00:39:03 --> 00:39:04

It's very good.

00:39:04 --> 00:39:05

It's also available I think on Kindle.

00:39:05 --> 00:39:07

Another one that's really good is called The

00:39:07 --> 00:39:08

Prophet of Mercy.

00:39:08 --> 00:39:12

And that's by Maulana Ashraf Ali Tanvi.

00:39:12 --> 00:39:13

That's a really, really nice one.

00:39:14 --> 00:39:17

Also, Sheikh Yasser Qadi has a really, really

00:39:17 --> 00:39:19

good work that has been put together.

00:39:19 --> 00:39:20

It's a little bit on the pricier side

00:39:20 --> 00:39:22

but it's a really good investment if you

00:39:22 --> 00:39:23

want to learn the seerah in a nice

00:39:23 --> 00:39:24

way.

00:39:25 --> 00:39:27

There's also one that's quite long by Adil

00:39:27 --> 00:39:29

Salahi called Muhammad, Man and Messenger.

00:39:30 --> 00:39:30

That one's good.

00:39:30 --> 00:39:33

So, I would say in order of length

00:39:33 --> 00:39:35

I would do In the Footsteps of the

00:39:35 --> 00:39:35

Prophet.

00:39:35 --> 00:39:38

I would do Prophet of Mercy.

00:39:39 --> 00:39:42

I would do Sheikh Yasser Qadi's biography of

00:39:42 --> 00:39:44

the Prophet ﷺ and then I would do

00:39:44 --> 00:39:47

Adil Salahi's text which is called Muhammad, Man

00:39:47 --> 00:39:49

and Messenger ﷺ.

00:39:49 --> 00:39:49

Okay?

00:39:54 --> 00:39:56

My relatives are very strict in forcing me

00:39:56 --> 00:39:58

to wear the hijab more than I am

00:39:58 --> 00:39:58

ready for.

00:39:59 --> 00:40:01

How do I maintain boundaries while still looking

00:40:01 --> 00:40:02

at the guidance positively?

00:40:03 --> 00:40:04

Very good question.

00:40:04 --> 00:40:07

You can take, hijab of course is a

00:40:07 --> 00:40:09

very specific experience and that is a very,

00:40:09 --> 00:40:11

very real challenge that a lot of our

00:40:11 --> 00:40:13

sisters have but you can extend this to

00:40:13 --> 00:40:15

any religious guidance that people get.

00:40:16 --> 00:40:17

So, I'm going to make this a little

00:40:17 --> 00:40:18

bit broader because obviously we have a large

00:40:18 --> 00:40:22

audience with different demographics but specifically with being

00:40:22 --> 00:40:25

forced, with having religious guidance forced upon you

00:40:25 --> 00:40:28

and down your throat, I have good news

00:40:28 --> 00:40:28

and I have bad news.

00:40:29 --> 00:40:30

Which one do you want first?

00:40:31 --> 00:40:31

The bad news?

00:40:31 --> 00:40:33

Okay, the bad news Okay, let me give

00:40:33 --> 00:40:37

you the good news first وَبَشِّرِ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ بَشِّرُوا

00:40:37 --> 00:40:40

وَلَا تُنَفِّرُوا The Prophet ﷺ was Bashira and

00:40:40 --> 00:40:40

then Nadhira.

00:40:41 --> 00:40:42

He gave good news and then he warned.

00:40:42 --> 00:40:45

So, the good news is that your relationship

00:40:45 --> 00:40:47

ultimately, spiritually is between you and Allah.

00:40:48 --> 00:40:50

So, whether or not your parents force you

00:40:50 --> 00:40:54

or friends or spouse or whatever, ultimately at

00:40:54 --> 00:40:56

the end of the day, Allah is judging

00:40:56 --> 00:40:58

you and grading you based on what He

00:40:58 --> 00:41:00

knows about you, not what people know about

00:41:00 --> 00:41:01

you and they're not grading you.

00:41:01 --> 00:41:02

So, that's step number one.

00:41:02 --> 00:41:03

Now, that's not a concession.

00:41:04 --> 00:41:05

I'm not saying, okay because of that, I

00:41:05 --> 00:41:06

don't have to pray, don't have to wear

00:41:06 --> 00:41:07

hijab No.

00:41:07 --> 00:41:10

But what I'm saying is Allah holds you

00:41:10 --> 00:41:13

to account based on your capacity and as

00:41:13 --> 00:41:17

long as you are sincere in intending to

00:41:17 --> 00:41:20

fulfill what you can do, Allah rewards you

00:41:20 --> 00:41:20

in that way.

00:41:21 --> 00:41:23

So, a person for example, let me give

00:41:23 --> 00:41:24

you an example of prayer because it's easier

00:41:24 --> 00:41:24

to understand.

00:41:25 --> 00:41:27

If a person prays no prayers a day

00:41:27 --> 00:41:29

and their family is like, pray, you have

00:41:29 --> 00:41:30

to pray five times a day.

00:41:30 --> 00:41:33

If that person prays twice the next day,

00:41:33 --> 00:41:36

Allah rewards that person and loves them for

00:41:36 --> 00:41:38

their effort even though they weren't perfect.

00:41:38 --> 00:41:39

Now, that doesn't mean that five times is

00:41:39 --> 00:41:41

no longer an obligation No.

00:41:41 --> 00:41:42

They have to get there.

00:41:43 --> 00:41:45

But Allah rewards you for your capacity and

00:41:45 --> 00:41:46

your journey that you take.

00:41:46 --> 00:41:48

So, don't ever stop going towards Him, ever.

00:41:49 --> 00:41:50

Even if you're less than perfect, that's okay.

00:41:51 --> 00:41:53

But, okay, so that's the good news.

00:41:54 --> 00:41:55

The good news is that Allah knows you

00:41:55 --> 00:41:57

and Allah rewards you and He will forgive

00:41:57 --> 00:41:58

accordingly.

00:41:58 --> 00:42:04

The bad news is that usually the unsolicited

00:42:04 --> 00:42:07

advice it never stops.

00:42:07 --> 00:42:11

From family, from friends, it will constantly happen

00:42:11 --> 00:42:12

all the time.

00:42:12 --> 00:42:14

So, maybe when you were younger it was

00:42:14 --> 00:42:16

coming from a certain person, then you get

00:42:16 --> 00:42:17

older and you meet someone else and now

00:42:17 --> 00:42:19

it comes from that person and then you

00:42:19 --> 00:42:20

get married and it comes from your in

00:42:20 --> 00:42:23

-laws and then, right, I'm joking, and then

00:42:23 --> 00:42:25

you meet somebody else and it comes from

00:42:25 --> 00:42:27

this person, you get a job and it

00:42:27 --> 00:42:27

comes from your boss.

00:42:27 --> 00:42:31

So, the presence of unsolicited advice that's being

00:42:31 --> 00:42:34

forced on you, that never disappears.

00:42:35 --> 00:42:35

That never disappears.

00:42:36 --> 00:42:38

So, if you're imagining or dreaming of a

00:42:38 --> 00:42:40

day where I can just be left alone

00:42:40 --> 00:42:43

or advised so sweetly and so gently, the

00:42:43 --> 00:42:44

reality is that's not going to happen.

00:42:45 --> 00:42:47

So, instead of hoping for a day that

00:42:47 --> 00:42:49

will not come, you have to instead prepare

00:42:49 --> 00:42:53

yourself to be resilient in the face of

00:42:53 --> 00:42:55

unwanted and unwarranted advice.

00:42:55 --> 00:42:59

Which is, take the good, listen to the

00:42:59 --> 00:43:02

message, and try your best to forgive the

00:43:02 --> 00:43:02

messenger.

00:43:03 --> 00:43:05

Listen to the message, whatever it is.

00:43:06 --> 00:43:07

If the person is telling you, listen to

00:43:07 --> 00:43:07

it.

00:43:08 --> 00:43:11

But try your best to pardon the messenger

00:43:11 --> 00:43:13

for the flaw in the delivery.

00:43:14 --> 00:43:16

And do not, do not, do not let

00:43:16 --> 00:43:19

the messenger become a reason why you discard

00:43:19 --> 00:43:20

the message altogether.

00:43:20 --> 00:43:24

Because that's not going to leave anybody in

00:43:24 --> 00:43:25

proving at all.

00:43:31 --> 00:43:34

Okay, let's do...

00:43:38 --> 00:43:39

How do you respond...

00:43:43 --> 00:43:44

Oh...

00:43:44 --> 00:43:45

This is actually a really good meta moment

00:43:45 --> 00:43:46

for all of us.

00:43:46 --> 00:43:48

How do you respond to an atheist friend

00:43:48 --> 00:43:51

who is staunchly anti-Islam at every point

00:43:51 --> 00:43:52

they say it's extreme?

00:43:55 --> 00:43:55

Can I give advice?

00:43:57 --> 00:43:59

This person should really not be your friend.

00:44:01 --> 00:44:03

No, listen, I'm going to be very honest.

00:44:04 --> 00:44:07

If there is an ounce of daylight, you

00:44:07 --> 00:44:08

can be friends with that person.

00:44:09 --> 00:44:11

Like an ounce, meaning like, hey, what do

00:44:11 --> 00:44:11

you think about Islam?

00:44:12 --> 00:44:13

It's not for me.

00:44:13 --> 00:44:15

Okay, that person, I'll still be friends with

00:44:15 --> 00:44:15

them.

00:44:15 --> 00:44:16

I have a lot of friends that are

00:44:16 --> 00:44:17

not Muslim that are like, it's not for

00:44:17 --> 00:44:17

me.

00:44:18 --> 00:44:19

I'm like, well, it's for you, so you

00:44:19 --> 00:44:21

better, you know, get with the program.

00:44:21 --> 00:44:23

Ash hadu an la ilaha illallah, right?

00:44:24 --> 00:44:26

So, an ounce of daylight is fine with

00:44:26 --> 00:44:26

me.

00:44:26 --> 00:44:27

You wrote, not me.

00:44:27 --> 00:44:29

I did not, no mubalighah here.

00:44:30 --> 00:44:32

Staunchly anti-Islam.

00:44:33 --> 00:44:35

That's staunchly anti-you.

00:44:35 --> 00:44:37

Like, are you want to be friends with

00:44:37 --> 00:44:38

someone that does not like you?

00:44:39 --> 00:44:40

No.

00:44:41 --> 00:44:42

Have some dignity.

00:44:44 --> 00:44:46

If somebody is calling your prophet a liar,

00:44:48 --> 00:44:50

I can't be close to this person anymore.

00:44:51 --> 00:44:52

I don't believe that he was a messenger.

00:44:53 --> 00:44:57

Now, if it's conversational, alright, I'm curious.

00:44:57 --> 00:44:58

I don't know.

00:44:58 --> 00:44:59

I was raised this way.

00:44:59 --> 00:45:00

That's different.

00:45:00 --> 00:45:02

I'm talking about the one who is like

00:45:02 --> 00:45:03

Bill Maher.

00:45:05 --> 00:45:06

The one who is like, in your face

00:45:06 --> 00:45:08

about religion is brainwashing and you're this and

00:45:08 --> 00:45:09

you're that.

00:45:09 --> 00:45:11

You can't play uno with that person.

00:45:12 --> 00:45:13

It doesn't work.

00:45:14 --> 00:45:16

Your identity, your belief, your principle, what makes

00:45:16 --> 00:45:18

you you, the reason your heart is pumping,

00:45:18 --> 00:45:22

is too diametrically opposed to the things that

00:45:22 --> 00:45:22

they're saying.

00:45:22 --> 00:45:26

And if that doesn't push you a little

00:45:26 --> 00:45:29

bit, right, you have to really assess.

00:45:30 --> 00:45:32

Listen, friendships have compatibility too.

00:45:33 --> 00:45:33

It's not just marriage.

00:45:34 --> 00:45:36

Friendships have compatibility as well.

00:45:37 --> 00:45:39

And if the person that you're friends with

00:45:39 --> 00:45:43

makes you feel bad or worse for what

00:45:43 --> 00:45:45

you believe in, then you have to assess

00:45:45 --> 00:45:48

whether or not this person is worth a

00:45:48 --> 00:45:49

piece of you.

00:45:50 --> 00:45:52

That's bitter advice, but that's just real.

00:45:53 --> 00:45:54

And I'll tell you this, as a 36

00:45:54 --> 00:45:56

-year-old, when I was 24, when I

00:45:56 --> 00:45:58

was 26, when I was 28, I thought

00:45:58 --> 00:46:00

all my friends back then were going to

00:46:00 --> 00:46:00

continue to be my friends.

00:46:01 --> 00:46:05

But some friendships, just like good books, have

00:46:05 --> 00:46:05

endings.

00:46:06 --> 00:46:08

And the chapters move on and then eventually

00:46:08 --> 00:46:09

they close.

00:46:09 --> 00:46:09

And that's okay.

00:46:10 --> 00:46:11

If Tihaj Muhammad was the first person I

00:46:11 --> 00:46:12

heard say this, I thought it was amazing.

00:46:13 --> 00:46:14

I was like, not only are you an

00:46:14 --> 00:46:16

Olympic athlete, you're also a genius.

00:46:16 --> 00:46:18

She said some friendships come to an end

00:46:18 --> 00:46:18

and that's okay.

00:46:19 --> 00:46:20

And if you're at a point where Islam

00:46:20 --> 00:46:22

means a lot to you in your life

00:46:22 --> 00:46:24

and Allah means the most to you, then

00:46:24 --> 00:46:28

that friendship that's challenging that, it might be

00:46:28 --> 00:46:29

time for the last chapter.

00:46:30 --> 00:46:30

Right?

00:46:30 --> 00:46:31

It might be.

00:46:31 --> 00:46:33

Unless the person is willing to have a

00:46:33 --> 00:46:37

conversation and be respectful and loving and mutually

00:46:37 --> 00:46:37

supportive.

00:46:38 --> 00:46:39

We ask Allah to give us Tawfiq.

00:46:39 --> 00:46:41

We ask Allah to make it easy for

00:46:41 --> 00:46:42

us and to forgive our sins.

00:46:42 --> 00:46:44

We ask Allah to make us those that

00:46:44 --> 00:46:45

are able to give good advice and receive

00:46:45 --> 00:46:48

good advice and that our life is improved

00:46:48 --> 00:46:50

by the company that we keep.

00:46:50 --> 00:46:50

Ameen.

00:46:50 --> 00:46:50

Ameen.

00:46:50 --> 00:46:51

Ya Rabbil Alameen.

00:46:51 --> 00:46:54

Subhanak, Allahumma bihamdik, nashadu an la ilaha illa

00:46:54 --> 00:46:56

anta, nashtaghfiruka wa antubu ilayk.

00:46:56 --> 00:46:58

I'm going to ask everybody inshallah because maghrib

00:46:58 --> 00:47:00

is literally starting in two minutes to make

00:47:00 --> 00:47:01

your way to the musalla.

00:47:01 --> 00:47:03

If you sat on one of our chairs,

00:47:03 --> 00:47:04

help us out by folding it and putting

00:47:04 --> 00:47:06

it on one of the dollies.

00:47:06 --> 00:47:07

And if you sat on one of our

00:47:07 --> 00:47:09

backjacks up here, just help us by gently

00:47:10 --> 00:47:12

standing it or laying it towards the front

00:47:12 --> 00:47:13

inshallah.

00:47:13 --> 00:47:14

Jazakumullah khairan.

00:47:14 --> 00:47:17

We'll see you inshallah the next few events

00:47:17 --> 00:47:17

that we have this week.

00:47:17 --> 00:47:18

Check our calendar.

00:47:18 --> 00:47:20

Wassalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.

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