Aashiq Hill – Msa 2016
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AI: Transcript ©
The
is normally very boring and dry. They normally
always give you the dry comments,
like, you know, the of the of that.
That's normally very, very boring for Allah.
So inshallah, I I ask him, he say,
what do you want? What is the objective
behind the lecture? And this is more intimacy.
So I'm going to be very frank. I'm
gonna speak about matters of intimacy.
That's gonna make some of you uncomfortable,
but that's to do with this. Really important
breakdown in marriages,
*,
all of these things are life in our
communities. Why? Due to the due to the
lack of intimacy.
So I'm gonna deal with these matters inshallah.
And if you're feeling over talking, inshallah, the
teaching is overrated.
I will also be speaking about in laws.
You know?
I will give you tips and advices.
This this issue of marriage,
it is a major context,
It is a major thing in the life
of a Muslim. And the prophet
put me and you in a beautiful tradition.
He said
that
the
this is normally if you teach marriage. Mullah
Mu'adhkari is in a world of his own
in in regards to the things that remains
in suhada. SubhanAllah. I learned the law. But
when it comes to the issue of marriage,
the first thing that the women state,
You understand? That's the first thing they want
to know. What are threats?
So inshallah, I will mention a few things
inshallah.
Hopefully, this is the first time you will
learn these things. So they ask I'm I'm
a listen to this inshallah. Intimacy, being the
main topic. I know you guys are, good
stuff. We will discuss that inshallah. I won't
be in the
in sexual intimacy and other matters inshallah. That
we will discuss in detail. That's why we
go to the next one. That I can
inherit from one another. To inherit from one
another versus
when husband we have
and wife inherit from husband.
Number 3,
the the life of lineage. If I'm adding
my wife, she's my wife. The kids that
are born from that marriage are my kids.
So that's,
the rights that each of us enjoy. Allah
states in the Quran, and Allah proves this
concept of rights and obligations by stating. And
for them, the women, are rights similar to
what is upon them. So like women have
obligations,
they have rights as well. Like males have
obligations,
they have rights as well.
What are those
rights that are particular to the female,
the Dawid?
Dawg. Allah commands that we have to pay
our dawg. Is there any specific amount that
the dawg should be? Any specific amount?
No. Any specific amount?
The husband takes the wife away. Do you
see why? No.
No
maintenance. The
one who has a lot should spit on
his wife, and the one that does not
have a lot should still spit on his
wife. So maintenance is the obligation of the
and the right of who? The right of
the spouse. Is it obligatory for my wife
to do well?
Is it obligatory?
No. Is it obligatory for me to support
my wife? Yes. Yes. The matter of
finance is a really, really important matter of
subhanallah. Imagine, as one lady says,
she says,
does money bring happiness? Quick quick question.
He's a very stingy person. My husband, extremely
stingy. He doesn't spin. Prophet
He
gives the
judgment.
Think what you supposed to get.
And that it's supposed to come to your
child
with
It is based upon the custom and the
agreement of the spouses.
If my spouse is,
agrees that, inshallah, I will buy the groceries
and I will buy the clothing and stuff
like that, and then maybe give a pocket
money, R500 every month.
That is. Differs from society to society. Perhaps
in your areas, the is about 10,000 bucks
a month. You get that?
From place to place, the risk from capital
to capital.
Whatever is a need of that
will be that will be the number 5.
Kind and proper treatment to treat your spouse
well.
Said that the believers who are also competing
their faith, the people that have the best
iman, the highest level of iman are those
believers that keep their wives, the best. Subhanallah.
You can be standing in a running up
and down the stairs looking like big shit
and speaking and saying nice things, Subhanallah.
But if you're not speaking your wife properly,
then
to speak about
sexual relations
in general, to discuss the legality of it.
What is this permissible? Is that permissible? Fine.
Pray god that that's permissible.
As for, you know,
in the bedroom and stuff like that.
And she is intimate with him.
The next morning comes and he exposes her.
How will your friends look at that wife?
How will your brothers look at that spouse
of? How will the sisters look at the
husband? You understand? We don't want that. We
want a pure a pure society.
Justice between multiple wives?
Explain anyone justice between multiple wives?
Obviously, if you have more than one wife,
otherwise,
bless you.
She needs a 1, a 3, 4 bedroom
house. But my married sister, Sumeya,
was no kids. Does she also need a
5 bedroom house? No. Obviously, you have to
adjust and you have to be fed. If
this one has a place to live in,
that one should also have a place to
live in. If my wife
or a waste is a certain a weight.
We won't discuss numbers and stuff like that.
And I buy her a certain amount of
material, should I buy the other one?
No. I have to
and stuff like that. Prophet said, he's the
one who gets a slave girl. He manies
her and he teaches her religion. He teaches
her a deed. He gives her good ada
and good training. So he teach her a
deed. What do we mean by teaching the
deed?
You know? Those things that are incumbent upon
her, those matters I must teach her. If
I'm unable to teach her, then she has
the right to go seek to that knowledge.
To defend the honor, to defend you what's
honor, not to expose the secret and stuff
like that, made from enemies and stuff like
that.
It's more a responsibility than an honor. You
understand? It's not like I'm the boss in
house. I'm the dictator when I say it
goes. No.
Everything is done upon and,
consultation and stuff like that. But the one
who leads the pack is obviously is obviously
the husband. To wait to be obeying all
that,
I'm sorry, to be obeying those matters,
then that we're not,
in the disobedience of Allah.
Like the like the like the stuff there.
K.
Medical relations, that's the like of spouse as
well. How many amongst many people, wherein in
the books of the scholars, you will find
many scholars think that they write in the
mercy
that
Okay. You're not sleeping. Okay. I'm going to
laugh. Okay. She should not be dua without
his permission. Authentic ahad even this matter. Obviously,
if you have an understanding with your husband
that he does not mind that he be
duaus, then should there be a problem?
No. Obviously not.
The
there.
The matter of intimacy,
imagine Allah speaks about it in the Quran.
But one thing that Allah never makes mention
of,
the epic word for intimacy is what?
Is.
Have you heard about the word?
What is a?
A group of people. Right? So
comes from the same root.
Means to come light.
So if you put it on a certain
vector, you say, jama'ah,
2 people combining, subhanAllah, 2 people sign with
1. You get that? So the Quran speaks
about intimacy, but David doesn't use the term
6 or for that matter, jima. It uses
the terms touching
when you move against your wife like that.
That's what the Quran. The Quran teaches us
Adam. How to deal with the matter with
the matter of intimacy, subhanallah.
The sunnah, subhanallah.
So many ahadith.
Yeah. Subhanallah.
Indeed, Allah is not shy of the truth.
Is this, this, and that allowed?
Companions, female
so many so many actors. I'm gonna give
you a few examples.
The scholars speak about something called.
Means
that's the fucking the thigh.
Okay? Tafid means tafid means the die. The
scholars wrote about impermissibility
of your wife satisfying you
by placing your organ
be in between do you see the soft
part here? And rubbing it. So hang on
a look. Think about it.
Why? You're fulfilling your need. Like how we
learn the fiqh of salah even though the
fiqh of salah clause is like, the fiqh
of Hajj, we also have to learn about
the fiqh of intimacy, the fiqh of sexual
relations, the fiqh of the Bedoum.
This fiqh is never discussed. Is it?
So I'm sure that today we will discuss
it. Why do people resort to *?
Why do they resort to a dolly? Because
many times the wife would say, no. That's
not permissible.
But because she does not know the fiqh
of the bedroom, the fiqh of intimacy,
the thick of sexual relations
is a breakdown in the in the marriage.
Next slide.
One of the objectives of marriage is what?
Performant of sexual sexual desires like.
We have sexual means. You understand? We are
attracted to the opposite *. Like I always
speak about and I mention to my wife,
Simon, is it something wrong, inherently, to being
attracted to the opposite *, even if you're
married?
No. It's natural.
You'll always be attracted to the opposite *.
Like, when you are married, obviously, you know
how to curve that. You know how to
control that trauma. So one of the objectives
of marriage is the fulfillment of sexual desires.
Often, a spouse will refuse to engage in
a form of sexual activity,
mistakenly believing believing it to be a normal,
which could easily sour the relationship.
Therefore, we study the do's and the don'ts
and stuff like that. Lack of intimacy leads
to the breakdown of marriage problems,
which in turn leads lead to divorce.
Couples are not satisfied, etcetera, etcetera.
That's the reason why we're discussing this problem.
But you have to speak about it. If
we are not gonna speak about it,
who will move the India's is gonna check
on Google.
So we don't want that. We don't want
people to check on Google because on Google,
you're gonna get the opinion of Frank, Simon,
and Ibrahim and all these type of characters.
That's important.
That's important. That's important.
When a man sits listen to this, Hari.
When a man sits
on top, basically, it means amidst her full
parts, her arms and legs, he sits on
top of her, exerts pressure on her, and
the true path becomes completely upon him.
That's gonna open a can of worms now.
Imagine. If anyone need you that second before,
you hear that way? The year before besides,
the sisters at the democratic class,
you hear that before, India's?
All matters of sexual relations
are allowed
unless proven and permissible. That means the scope
is empty.
We view 6 everything's how long, except, you
know, certain things in a span. But the
opposite is true.
Everything is allowed. We come to intimacy
except those limited scenarios that the blind sunnah
speaks about. Limited. Let's say limited. Keyword over
there. So that's one that's intimacy one one,
Part of your course who have memorized,
Now sudden versus,
the reason of.
Then you get something called
and the reason why the have seen something.
Something happened.
That's the occasion, and the prophet did the
response. That's only
And then you get something in the as
known
as.
And the reason why it companionship something.
So this hadith is directed by Abdullah ibn
Mas'rul. Why? Because Husband, the great cleric of
the Muslims, he came to him, and Abdullah
al Mas'kru was at the age of 8
years old. And he said, oh, Abdullah,
virgin
daughter.
And Abdullah Mas'kruh,
you made that young girl enough. Energy's gone.
State is gone.
If you have that inclination in terms of
you have a desire for sexual relations,
because it will cause you to lower your
eyes.
It will cause you to protect your prior
parts.
If you cannot do that, they fast.
Fast, inshallah.
The next,
objective of intimacy is fulfill the life of
your spouse. Like you have desires,
your spouse also has desires. So you have
all those desires. A removal of harmful fluids,
you get that? You know what they call
this part of your body?
Have you? Yeah. What? They call this Baghdad.
Not Baghdad.
Baghdad. You mean the, you know, Baghdad. The
back of dad. You get that? So the
removal of harmful fluids.
The very, very famous,
very, very important method,
sexual enjoyment, SubhanAllah.
We said that Allah will share the truth,
and if Allah will share, well, we
what do you think we came in? How
about to make an impact of me? I
wasn't gonna.
Okay.
That's an excellent answer. As often as the
need arise. So
When your wife is free from the situation,
then approach your wives.
And the question at the heart of his
sister, every so often without listening fixed at
a specific frequency. So if you feel the
need twice a week, thrice a week, 10
times a week, whatever the case may be,
couples the first works with different folks. Everyone
different in this matter, in this, in this
very, very important issue.
So how regular?
It may so often. You know, you you
decide you marry and you decide that.
Islam does not fix a specific limit or
distinction on how often the government may engage
in
Likewise like what Lamar had mentioned, a lack
of this is problematic. We have to agree
with that. Many people will know. Those who
are not ready, those who understand, you'll get
that. Oh, I don't know.
Lack of it
will need to will need to feel failure
to manage.
But overindulging
is also calling for problems. So moderation is
very, very important.
According to some scholars, what is considered moderation
is once a week. So they say every
Friday
eve Thursday evening
or Friday morning, before full you need at
that time is the sunnah of the prophet
Why do they state this? Where do they
come with us?
Do you think it's true? They do so
good.
The plot is in a beautiful
So they say, evening,
once a week. Friday,
just before tomorrow or
Thursday evening.
For us to for us to to suit
what is best for us and stuff like
that. Islam does not specify any particular time
for engaging in or desisting from sexual activity.
It depends on the couple. Many couples may
choose any time of the day or night
for intimacy. It depends on the mood, urge,
temperament, and stuff like that. It's best when
both parties act. Oh, most probably at night,
late night, or in the case maybe,
and they can engage in the matter of
if the next life.
In terms of the
or removal of hair. Any excess excess hair,
excess, you remove,
that means puberty,
hair that grows up. It's not supposed to
grow. For sure, you
remove that hair. Beautification,
wearing nice and revealing clothing, skimpy, skimpy clothing,
and stuff like that. Very important.
Islam is not a, demon.
Alright? I have to come back over one
from the. It's a narration that says that
I said,
hide him. I, myself
Aisha, have never seen the private parts of
Rasulullah
nor has he seen my private parts. What's
that mean? Simon?
What?
Anyone?
You need an expert opinion here?
Anything in regards to sexual intimacy is allowed
and this is clear,
authentic evidence to prove otherwise.
There's no evidence to prove otherwise.
We
make it basically on the same front of
the house, but it's still to me 100%
Those people are transgressing the limits of Allah.
Allah does not give the leeway of *.
Allah does not say, please go home. Allah
has given you a wife. Allah has given
you fasting. Yeah. So Allah, you quite get
it fast.
Why did the prophet not say?
So it is not how long. It is
one language. As
for fluid that comes up,
there we have to make a distinction. Number
1,
money, sperm, according to the majority of the
scholars, is pure and not impure. It's not
nudges according to the majority. Obviously, there is
a difference of opinion of the specter.
Madi?
Is pre
Pretty similar to it. According to the majority
of the scholars, this is.
So, technically, if you can get this right,
you're doing this act, so to say, and
then give it down, you remove it. And
then you do that act and then it
over.
And in that scenario, all the permissible. And
Allah knows best. And
I'm just discussing the usual of making child.
I know it's uncomfortable, but I I I
want to discuss this because we have many,
many misconceptions about, about 16,
oral,
fallatio, basically.
Next issue insha'Allah.
It's
the opposite.
It's the opposite. When the husband uprights his
mouth, the private age of the female, but
it's not the previous who is also permissible.
Next insha'Allah.
In the law and the law is not
shy of the truth. You are not allowed
to penetrate the * of your of your
spouse. That is how long?
Next, these things will come in the Quran
and then in the Quran
and
the