Waleed Basyouni – How Do I Get My Kids To Start Caring About Performing Prayers – Ask The Imam

Waleed Basyouni
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The speakers stress the importance of consistent prayer and activity for children, particularly in older individuals. It is important to pray with parents and be firm in their approach, as it can lead to weaker behaviors. It is also important to monitor behavior and lead around activities around "slow time" for children. The speakers stress the need for cooperation and monitoring of behavior, particularly in older individuals.

AI: Summary ©

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			I actually get this question quite a bit
		
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			by parents who struggle sometimes to, you know,
		
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			make their children consistent in their prayer, you
		
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			know, whether they have reached puberty or not.
		
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			What is the best way to, let's say,
		
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			encourage the child or make the child, you
		
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			know, love the prayer and pray regularly and
		
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			consistently?
		
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			And is there a way, like, you go
		
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			gradually or what do you do basically?
		
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			I'm wondering what you say, Sheikh, when they
		
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			ask you this question.
		
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			Oh.
		
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			I'm flubbed in here.
		
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			I start with du'a.
		
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			I start making du'a.
		
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			Make du'a.
		
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			Yes.
		
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			Yes, I start with du'a.
		
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			Very beautiful.
		
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			The Qur'an, you say in the du
		
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			'a, Ibrahim alayhi as-salam said, Allah make
		
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			me among those who establish the salah.
		
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			I'm from my children.
		
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			Yes.
		
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			Very good.
		
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			So, that's one.
		
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			And I remember the ayah of the Qur
		
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			'an, وَأَمُرْ أَهْلَكَ بِالصَّلَاةِ وَاصْطَبِرْ عَلَيْهَا Meaning?
		
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			Remind and order your family.
		
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			Yeah, but be patient with them.
		
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			So, I do that and I tell the
		
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			people to do that.
		
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			Don't give up.
		
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			Be consistent in asking them.
		
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			And also, don't be harsh.
		
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			Right.
		
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			You know, be nice and gentle.
		
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			Just a reminder.
		
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			Give us, let's say, a holistic answer.
		
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			Well, Shaykh, one other thing I will say,
		
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			make sure that you pray with, for example,
		
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			if you're a mother, pray with your daughters.
		
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			Ask them to come join you in prayer.
		
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			So, they see you as a role model.
		
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			If you're a father, pray with them or
		
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			take them with you to the masjid.
		
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			Can you tell them in the camera?
		
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			Yeah, yeah, yeah.
		
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			I'm telling them.
		
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			Be basically consistent.
		
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			Remember that.
		
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			Yeah.
		
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			Be consistent in taking them to the masjid.
		
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			Come to the masjid more often.
		
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			Also, one other thing that you can make,
		
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			a prize.
		
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			If you're consistent in praying for this amount
		
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			for a month, no missing salah at all,
		
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			Fajr, Dhuhr, Asr, Maghrib, Isha, there is a
		
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			prize for you.
		
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			You know, reward them for doing good.
		
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			You know, talk to them about the importance
		
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			of salah.
		
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			Start early.
		
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			You know, Nabi Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam said, Listen,
		
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			order them to pray at seven.
		
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			And even at ten, you become firm.
		
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			And there is discipline if they did not
		
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			pray.
		
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			So, be firm about this.
		
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			Let them make sure that salah is more
		
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			important than anything else.
		
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			One of the reasons people, kids not consistent
		
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			in salah, because when they go out to,
		
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			let's say, to the park or to play
		
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			or to, you know, these jumping places where
		
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			they go, to play on the boardwalk or,
		
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			you know, or go to a theater, and
		
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			they book this kind of trip or this
		
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			activity around the salah so they miss the
		
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			salah.
		
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			Make sure they said, No.
		
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			Before you book your activity, is this around
		
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			salah time?
		
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			Make them think that their life is around
		
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			the salah.
		
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			Their activity is around the salah.
		
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			I'm not going to miss the salah.
		
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			And if they are outside, let's stop and
		
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			pray.
		
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			How can we pray in public?
		
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			Let them see you doing that.
		
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			So, these things will help them.
		
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			Don't make it, you know, don't make the
		
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			salah too long for them so they will
		
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			get bored.
		
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			Teach them in the salah that they make
		
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			dua.
		
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			Teach them that this is an opportunity for
		
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			them to review their Quran, you know, to
		
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			read different verses.
		
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			Sometimes you encourage them to lead the salah.
		
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			Mahmoud ibn al-Rabi' he was a child,
		
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			and he was leading his people sometime.
		
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			You know, there is a whole, there is
		
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			a little bit of caveat for this.
		
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			Is a child allowed to lead salah or
		
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			not?
		
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			As long as the child, this is the
		
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			debate between the fuqaha of the validity, but
		
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			let's say at least in volunteer prayers, okay,
		
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			and also if they are mumayyiz, if they
		
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			know all the rules of the salah, the
		
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			sahoo, the wudu, the stuff.
		
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			They can keep their purity.
		
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			Yeah, so, in my opinion, they will be
		
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			allowed to lead the salah.
		
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			One other thing also to make them consistent
		
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			of the salah, make sure that they pray
		
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			salat al-nafila, the volunteer prayers, from the
		
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			early age.
		
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			Because, subhanAllah, volunteer prayers is like siyaj, is
		
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			like a protection for the obligatory prayers.
		
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			It's like a layer of defense.
		
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			So the shaytan, if you only pray obligatory
		
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			prayer, the shaytan straight go to the obligatory
		
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			prayer.
		
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			Right.
		
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			But if you have a defense mechanism, like
		
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			a wall around it, which is the volunteer
		
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			prayer, subhanAllah, it weakened him.
		
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			It weakened the shaytan before he reaching to
		
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			the wajibat.
		
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			That's why if somebody like became careless about
		
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			the volunteer, even we notice from ourselves as
		
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			adults, if we don't care about the volunteer
		
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			prayers, we found later on our salah, the
		
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			obligatory prayer is not on time, not as
		
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			focused.
		
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			It became weaker.
		
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			But if you're good with your volunteer prayers,
		
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			or sunan prayer, that protects the core prayer.
		
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			So, that's why also, if you look at
		
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			the older, I don't know if you know
		
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			this in the masjid, look at the older
		
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			generations.
		
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			They always pray the sunnah.
		
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			Yes.
		
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			Even though not very religious.
		
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			While you see the so-called religious young
		
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			people, they don't care about salatul sunnah.
		
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			Salatul sunnah al maghrib, sunnah al isha, sunnah
		
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			al fajr, sunnah al dhuhr, they don't care
		
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			about it.
		
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			They probably pray it at home.
		
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			Allah, shaykh, I don't know.
		
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			These young, I notice a lot of them
		
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			don't pray.
		
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			But that's something, why the older ones do
		
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			that.
		
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			Because from the beginning of their life, they
		
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			were told you pray the sunnah, you pray
		
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			the sunnah, you pray the 12 rak'ah
		
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			every day.
		
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			And that's why they're consistent in their salat
		
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			is strong.
		
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			My father, for example, said, I never missed
		
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			salat since I was 7 years old.
		
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			You know, many people today, even religious, they
		
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			can't make that claim.
		
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			And my father was just an average person.
		
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			Rahimahullah.
		
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			So, and that's something that for me, because
		
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			they always pray it and pray the sunnah
		
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			with it.
		
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			So these are some points that, you know,
		
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			I think it has to be a concern,
		
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			cooperation between father and mother about the importance
		
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			of salat, encouragement, putting rewards for it, admonitions,
		
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			be nice, be consistent, be a role model.
		
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			Be patient with them.
		
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			Be patient with them.
		
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			And wake them up for the salat.
		
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			Right.
		
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			So, du'a, you make du'a for
		
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			them.
		
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			The parent lead by example.
		
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			They call them to pray with them.
		
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			They put a prize.
		
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			They make a schedule.
		
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			Okay, I want you to fill this.
		
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			How many prayers you prayed.
		
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			And by the end of the month, there
		
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			is this prize for you.
		
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			Bring them to the masjid.
		
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			Make them love to make du'a to
		
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			Allah.
		
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			If they need something, your prayer is your
		
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			means to that.
		
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			Your way for that.
		
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			Pray the sunnah.
		
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			Pray the sunnah, which is the protection for
		
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			the fard, obligatory.
		
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			These are really great points.
		
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			Yeah.
		
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			Yes.
		
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			Ameen.
		
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			JazakAllah khair.
		
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			JazakAllah khair.